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Chapter 44: All Sticky

Because Kilyan left out the little detail of Avi's super strength, the village council decided that Avi's possession of a penis was harmless and that she could stay. Kilyan practically bounced home, and he celebrated his good fortune by having another orgy. That time around, Avi sat on his dick, Lea sat on his face as he licked her, and Ohana straddled his belly as Avi fucked her. They were a sticky mess by the time they were through, and when Loryn and Kira dropped by to drop off LiAnh, it was to discover the four lovers bathing each other beside the fire.

Loryn's eyes about popped from his face when he saw Ohana tenderly bathing Avi's rigid cock with the tip of her tongue, and Kira - shocked and red in the face - covered both the eyes of her husband and her grandson before steering them out.

It was Inden who returned much later with LiAnh - as well as Elele and the news that he was allowed to marry her, thus integrating her into the summer tribe. Wynn stopped by for dinner with Sylas, and it was over the meal that Kilyan suggested they should all have one wedding ceremony together. Inden hugged Elele tight in one arm and expressed his enthusiasm while Wynn and Sylas expressed their enthusiasm with a kiss.

And so it was that, one cold and wintry morning as the snow fell silent to coat the earth, Kilyan was married to Avi, Wynn was married to Sylas, and Inden was married to Elele. The family gathered for the ceremony, all standing in a crowd as they watched the union. Zalia was so happy for Wynn and Kilyan that she cried in Keeno's arms, and Loryn did not waste an opportunity to tease Kilyan or ruffle his mane that he had finally lived the bi wolf's dream: a wife with a dick! Zane joked with his father that he now had to find a third wife in order to keep up with him, and LiAnh incited Wynn's wrath by throwing snowballs at the back of her head. Mio and Zee joined in, and the three boys soon engaged in a friendly snowball fight with Wynn and Sylas.

As a wonderful last minute surprise, Lynny arrived at the village. He was late for the ceremony but did not miss the opportunity to tickle Wynn or size up Sylas, to ruffle Kilyan's ears or playfully lock his big arm around Loryn's neck. White and burly and big as Zane, Lynny was also Ohana's father. He kissed his daughter and demanded to know when she planned on producing more sons, rode Mio and Zee around on his shoulders, and had a crazy wrestling match with Zane.

It was a beautiful day, full of fun and laughter, and at the end of it, Kilyan, Lea, and Ohana all jokingly carried Avi over the threshold of their home before making love to her in the bedroom the four of them would now share.

It was the perfect ending to the perfect day for everyone.

Everyone except Loryn. With the ceremony over, Loryn walked Kira home, LiAnh riding on his shoulders and kicking his legs as he cried for grandpa to "Giddy up!" Loryn laughed and jerked LiAnh playfully on his shoulders before setting him down when they reached the house, then he kissed his wife warmly and told her he wanted to drop by Yzlo's before it got dark.

Kira knew Loryn was lying. She knew him well and could always tell when the truth was not coming from those sensual lips. But she also knew better than to let on the fact that she knew. So taking LiAnh on her hip, she smiled and kissed her husband back, but her bright eyes watched with concern as he passed up the street.

Some time later and Loryn sat beneath a tree in the northern forest, missing Kel. It was not something he was used to doing because in the past, he had so seldom gone without. But having gone for so long without him? There were some days Loryn didn't know what he would do. It was like being kicked out by Kira all over again. A feeling of being lost and lonely and confused had welled up in him then, much the way it was welling up in him now. And he sat under that tree, his paws limp between his relaxed legs, and just stared.

It suddenly seemed to him that he was never able to hold on to anybody the way Kel was. He had almost lost Kira, had lost Eno for eternity, and now he had lost Kel. But Kel? Kel had everyone and everything. It sometimes amazed Loryn, Kel's ability to keep other wolves in his life. They crowded around Kel like bees to the honey pot. But it seemed to Loryn all his life that, for some reason or other, wolves were always bouncing off of him and never sticking. And every day of his life since the night he first touched Kira in their wedding bed, he was in terror that Kira would bounce and not stick.

A minute passed, two, and Loryn could hear footfall. Heavy footfall. This was a big wolf. He sat there, not caring if some lone wolf stumbled upon him or if some warriors on patrol crossed his path. In both instances, he would react the same way: fuck off. He wanted to be alone. Alone with his thoughts, with the wintry silence of the forest, with the beat of his heart.

It was evening and quickly becoming night. Loryn knew he should have been heading home to Kira, but he didn't think he could do it. He didn't think he could go home to her sympathetic stares, to her pitying arms and eyes. She knew, after all, that he had been in love with Kel for years, much the way she had been in love with him. She knew what it had done to him, Kel's walking out of his life, and she wanted in her typical sweet fashion to take his pain away with her kisses and her smiles. And sometimes Loryn would hold her at night and thank everything - the stars, the moon, the goddamned mud - that Kira, at least, would never, ever leave him. He'd shit a kidney first.

The footfall suddenly stopped, and Loryn knew that the stranger was probably somewhere in the trees regarding him. His nostrils flared to take in the scent and he was startled when he recognized it: rough, thick, musky, winter wolf. Loryn looked over his shoulder: Lynny was standing in the trees behind him, but not a hint of surprise was in his expression.

Norilyn - known as Lynny for short -- was Zaldon's younger brother, a winter wolf, and as a consequence, looked almost exactly like him. His white body was very tall and well-built, with a thick neck and black eyes that did not twinkle like Zaldon's but were instead usually playful and commanding. He was clad in a heavy cloak against the bitter winter - a cloak that had been a present, Loryn knew, from Zaldon - and on his hip, he wore a dagger.

Looking Lynny up and down, Loryn smiled: that boy was still big and sexy. And still apparently a regular brute, for he came crashing through the trees toward Loryn, fairly bending them as he made his way.

Loryn turned back around and leaned against the tree. He closed his eyes. He knew why Lynny was at their village. He had heard some days ago through Kilyan: Ohana's mother had passed away. In despair, Lynny had set forth, traveling across the lands as he had when a child. He visited the mountain wolves, even the sun village, and still other far distant places and wolves. In search of something, he said. Perhaps in search of his wife. Or perhaps to run from his own pain. But when he returned to his daughter in the summer village, Lynny later told Loryn, his pain was still there. Perhaps more amplified simply because the trip had been without his wife.

Loryn closed his eyes as he listened to Lynny settle in the dead grass and snow beside him. He had never been this close to Lynny. Not in all thirty-eight years of knowing him. Lynny, like Zaldon, only had eyes for Kel. But unlike Zaldon, Lynny had never used Loryn to satisfy that longing. No, unlike his older brother, Lynny had never been afraid to approach Kel and grab him by the tail. Lynny had never been afraid to take anything he wanted.

Loryn and Lynny sat side by side in the middle of it, that white winter. Icicles were hanging from the barren branches of trees, and dead, crumpled leaves were pressing up from the thin blanket of snow. Winter was just beginning and pretty soon, it would once again melt into Spring. Sitting there beside Lynny, Loryn didn't think his winter would ever end.

On top of missing Kel, he still missed Eno. He hated himself for it, but that love was still there for Eno. Possibly because Loryn knew - had always known - that if he did not love Eno, no one would. It was something he still believed even now, fight it as he might. Something he held onto. A struggle within himself. And it was a dismal thing, fighting ones own self. For the first time in his life, Loryn fully understood Kel's inner struggles, fully understood that look of shame in Kel's face when his cock grew hard because of Zaldon. Finally, Loryn understood.

"I knew you'd be out here. Didn't even have to ask Kira," Lynny said after a pause.

Loryn didn't say anything.

"Still beating yourself up over my cousin?"

Loryn closed his eyes. Eno was Lynny and Zaldon's cousin, of course, and the son of Eloein, the sorcerer who had once taken Aliona.

Sitting beside Lynny, Loryn could feel the cold loom of his shadow, the brush of his hard fur. He could hear Lynny rummaging in the inner pocket of his cloak, then smelled the familiar musk of a pipe being lit.

"If you don't talk to me," Lynny said, his voice slightly muffled around the pipe in his teeth, "I will ram all eight inches of this pipe in your ass - or all eight inches of my dick. Your choice."

Loryn laughed before he could stop himself, and Lynny grinned. He passed Loryn the pipe. Loryn took a puff, passed it back. He almost choked. It was foreign leaf, something that grew in the fields near the winter village. He heard Lynny chuckle at him and marveled how deep Lynny's voice had gotten over the years. He had never paid attention to it before. But then, he realized, he had never really been alone with Lynny before.

"Saw Kel," Lynny said into the silence. He pulled the pipe from his teeth and stared thoughtfully into the distance.

"Saw or fucked?" Loryn teased somewhat bitterly.

Lynny laughed, almost as if he hadn't expected Loryn to respond that way. "No, Loryn, I didn't sleep with Kel. That I can promise you."

"Oh?" Loryn watched Lynny out of the corner of his eye, and he had to admit that he was amazed: in the past, Lynny had never wasted an opportunity to touch Kel. He had often described Kel as irresistible and had seemed to really believe it: he couldn't keep off him. It was something that had always amused Loryn, even if it did make him the tiniest bit jealous.

To be perfectly honest with himself, Loryn was a little angry the first time he found out Kel had given himself to Lynny. Loryn had been trying for years to be Kel's first lover under the waterfall. Had been asking for years - please, please let me make love to you! But who had Kel given it to? Zaldon and Lynny. Always, always, always, Zaldon and Lynny. Loryn sometimes scathingly thought that Kel would peel his ass cheeks open on reflex should Zaldon or Lynny walk by.

"He was so happy," Lynny said dreamily, and his black eyes gazed into the distant trees as if he was seeing an image of Kel with Zaldon, Aliona, and Julyan. "They all were. You know that glow mothers have when they're expecting?" He glanced at Loryn, who nodded. Lynny looked back to the trees and smiled. "Well, it was something like that. Something pure, their love. And I . . . I didn't want to touch it."

"I'm glad to hear Kel's happy," Loryn said, and it was the truth.

"Yeah. . . . but what about you?"

Loryn looked up to find Lynny watching him with concern from those black, commanding eyes. "Tell me how you feel," he ordered. "What is happening to you? Why do you wander around alone? I know you've been doing it for years now. But you had Kel then, so I didn't worry. I figured you could talk to Kel about it since you couldn't talk to Kira. But now . . ." Lynny frowned and lowered the pipe from his lips. "Now I'm worried. Because I know you'll talk to Kira about anything except that. And if you don't talk to someone, it will kill you."

Loryn looked away. He would die before he talked to Lynny about Eno. It was common knowledge that Zaldon and Lynny - and, shit, everyone else - had hated Eno. But what they didn't realize was that no one hated Eno more than Loryn. God, they did not realize.

Loryn tensed when he felt Lynny's big paw close on his knee. He wanted to jerk his knee away but didn't see how he could without looking stupid and awkward, so he kept still and continued glaring in the opposite direction. When Lynny's strong fingers squeezed his knee, Loryn realized this was precisely why he had chosen that part of his body: he could not escape that insistent touch.

"You know," Lynny said in a low voice as he ran his paw up Loryn's hard thigh, "I always wanted to touch you the way I touched Kel. But I knew it would make Kel angry. He had to have all his lovers to himself. We are never allowed to be together without Kel in-between." Lynny laughed and dropped his paw away.

Loryn swallowed hard. There had been a breathlessness in Lynny's voice that wasn't there before. He realized for the first time that Lynny was attracted to him. It wasn't something that he had never thought about, but as far as Loryn was concerned, Lynny was Kel's dirty secret and always would be.

"Why is it so difficult to talk to me?" Lynny demanded, almost in frustration. "I've got no one now - no one! So I came to you, hoping we could talk about something - anything - anything to take the hole from my heart. God, Idella, I miss you."

Loryn glanced around sympathetically. Idella had been Lynny's wife, of course. He was sitting with his forehead in his paw, his knees drawn up, and the paw holding his pipe resting on one knee. He suddenly threw the pipe hard and it was extinguished in the mud and snow. His broad chest was heaving, and Loryn was stricken to see tears in Lynny's eyes.

"You couldn't talk to Zaldon?" Loryn asked. He put a paw on Lynny's big shoulder and squeezed.

Lynny shook his head. "I talked to him. God, I even wound up crying as he held me, crying like a female --"

"Hey," Loryn said with a frown, "females aren't the only ones allowed to have feelings."

Lynny smiled and sniffed and blinked out more tears. "Same old Loryn," he said, "never afraid to feel, never afraid to be yourself, never afraid of being considered less than a male for your desires. You have no idea how I, how Kel and Zaldon, how everyone admires you for that!"

Loryn blinked at Lynny, startled. Apparently, he didn't have any idea. Gazing at Lynny's miserable face, Loryn realized that Lynny wanted to be comforted as much as he wanted to comfort. He pulled Lynny's neck into his arms and held him tight. Lynny's big arms enfolded Loryn's smaller body, tight with muscles and bristly fur. Their hard bodies flexed against each other in the fading light as Lynny closed his eyes and stroked Loryn's mane.

"There's no peace for us, is there?" Loryn said after a pause. "You've lost Idella and I've lost Eno, and there's a permanent hole where they used to be."

"What was so great about my cousin?" Lynny demanded, pulling back. He scowled as if he wanted to knock some sense into Loryn.

"It wasn't that Eno was great," Loryn said, shaking his head, "it was that . . . he could have been great if someone had just loved him. But no one did."

His face darkening, Loryn sat back against the tree again. Lynny sat watching him. It struck Lynny for the first time that Loryn was suffering because he had somehow thought he could save Eno, but he had failed.

Still sniffing with tears, Lynny closed his paw over Loryn's. Loryn looked around at him questioningly.

"You couldn't have saved him," Lynny whispered, "no one could, Loryn. That's what you need to understand. You did more for him than anyone ever did in his life. And somehow, in the end, that was enough."

They smiled at each other, and as Lynny squeezed his fingers, Loryn realized that his heart was beating very fast.

Lynny seemed to feel it too, the heaviness on the air. The struggle of fighting arousal. The longing and the lonely ache.

"Loryn . . . when was the last time with . . .?"

Loryn looked away as Lynny's meaning became clear. He had stopped fucking around on Kira years ago, and as a result, Kel was the only one he had touched. This seemed to become clear in the sudden misery that rose in Loryn's eyes.

"Me too," Lynny admitted. "Kel was the last time." He laughed after a pause and added, "And the first time since I married Idella."

Loryn lifted his eyebrows when he looked around at Lynny. "So Kel was the only male you were with . . .?"

"Since I was sixteen," confirmed Lynny, nodding mistily as he remembered that night so many years ago when he made love to Kel in his hut. "Of course, I had been with other males before Kel, but after him? I never touched another. I didn't know what it was to know the pleasure of a male's body before I knew Kel in my arms. And that first time I made love to him. . . ." Lynny closed his eyes as he remembered. "Kel shivered and moaned and his body kept tensing. He was so nervous. He thought I was gonna eat him alive and tried to escape me at first. But I didn't let him go. He admitted that he was frightened, but once he seemed to know that I would never harm him for the world, he relaxed. He kissed me. And I had never tasted anything so sweet." Lynny sighed.

Loryn stared at Lynny as this loving description was given. He had never in all this time guessed that Lynny . . . was in love with Kel. But then, he thought with a half-smile, who wasn't in love with Kel? He himself had fallen head over heels when they were nothing but little children.

"Tell me about it," Lynny said, smiling in amusement at Loryn's thoughtful expression.

Loryn looked around and realized Lynny had been watching him.

"About what?" Loryn said, his eyes shifting miserably to some distant, snow-coated tree. "My first time with Kel? It was nothing magical, I assure you."

"No, not your first time with Kel," Lynny returned, plucking his pipe from the snow. He wiped it clean with great care as he eyed Loryn and said, "The moment you fell in love with him. You've known him all your life, haven't you? So tell me about it. When did like turn to love?"

Loryn swallowed hard. So Lynny had guessed. He didn't want to tell. He'd rather do his best for forget the past, bury it, turn his back on it. But that was stupid. He could never forget Kel and how he felt about him.

"We were seven years old," Loryn said at last.

Lynny lifted his eyebrows. "Oh my. You have suffered long."

Loryn laughed. "Tell me about it. Our dads and the other warriors had taken us on a camping trip in the forest. You know . . . one of those trips that are supposed to help fathers teach sons about survival. How to fish and hunt, what berries to eat and what berries not to eat . . ."

Lynny nodded as he polished his pipe on his cloak.

"I never got along with my dad much," went on Loryn. "I hated him cuz he kicked my mom outta the house. Threw her clean out in the dirt. Of course, she had cheated on him. She fucked around on him all the time - had even brought some of her little friends home with her. But I was still more angry at him than at her. She had been unhappy with him for years: of course she was gonna mess around. I was a little kid and I coulda told him Mom was miserable! But he couldn't see that. All he could see was that she had cheated. He didn't have her stoned, of course - and he could've. He probably wanted to, the rotten bastard. But for whatever reason, he didn't. She was banished instead to the outskirts of the village. She lived in a shitty little hut by the wall, and no one was to speak to her, not her friends, not her own parents - not even me. You know how it is: pups are expected to disown adulterous mothers. Well, I had gone to visit her anyway. I was never gonna stop loving my mother and to hell with the traditions! My dad found out I'd been from some nosy old wolf next door. He whipped me blind. And during the camping trip that day, we weren't speaking to each other.

"The other pups laughed and played with their fathers. Hell, even Gurwin was nice to Kel. I can still remember it today, Kel laughing as Gurwin rode him on his shoulders. But my father? Yarorz ignored me. I tried to apologize - shit, I wasn't even sorry, I just wanted us to love each other again!"

Loryn paused and shook his head darkly, his eyes trained on the snow.

"I understand, Loryn, go on," Lynny said, and Loryn knew it was true: Zaldon and Lynny had almost never gotten along with their father Bayne for the same reasons.

"Well . . . to spite him, I ran away into the forest one night while everyone at the camp was sleeping," continued Loryn. He stopped and laughed, blinking as something hit him. "I never realized it until now, but Lea is so much like her father."

"What's that?" Lynny pulled the pipe from his lips, watching Loryn in curious amusement.

"She ran away like that too," Loryn explained. "Years ago when she was sixteen. Was mad at Kira for putting me out. Only thing was . . . I deserved it. Males never get punished for fucking around, but I should have been living in some crappy house on the edge of the village just like my mother . . ."

"Loryn . . ."

Loryn looked up when he felt Lynny's big paw on his knee again. Lynny's dark eyes were warm and concerned.

"You've made a few really stupid mistakes in your life," Lynny said gently, "but you didn't deserve anything more than what Kira gave you. And rightly so."

Loryn laughed sadly as he remembered Kira shoving him out so hard that he fell on his face in the mud. His sleeping furs slapped him in the face when he sat up, and he could hear the laughter of his neighbors, the taunts of children as he gathered his belongings and started the wretched walk for Eno's.

"Yeah, alright," Loryn relented, rubbing the back of his neck. "Having her throw me out like that was bad enough. So where was I? Oh, yeah - I ran away. It was very dark by the time I got up the nerve to do it, but my dad had been an ass all day and I was sick of him. He badmouthed my mother right in front of me, called her a whore and everything. What was worse, Gurwin loudly agreed, and he told my father that if he didn't get a firm hold on me, I was gonna wind up just like Nayrah. By the end of the day, I wanted to run away and never come back.

"So I waited until it was dark before I slipped from my sleeping furs. Two wolves were on watch, but I threw a rock into the trees. They went to investigate the noise, and while they were gone, I took off. It was hard finding my way in the dark, but I had been to the waterfall so many times that I could have found it blindfolded. I followed the scent of the flowers and reeds that grew near the water, and in at least half an hour, I was there.

"I didn't know what I was gonna do, just that I was never going back. It was dismally cold, that water at night, but I wadded in anyway. I'd rather freeze my ass off than go back to my father and his mean black eyes. So I swam hard. And by the time I reached the cavern, I couldn't hold back anymore. I crawled up on the cold stone floor . . . and I cried. I cried like I'd never cried before, because for the first time in my life, there wasn't some male standing over me ready to smack me in the head for it. I curled up in a little ball, and with my sobs echoing off the wall . . . I cried.

"Well, in a little while, I heard someone swimming toward the cavern. I sat up and just listened, scared stiff in my fur. I was sure it was my dad. And how was I gonna escape the cavern without him noticing? I knew I was in for it. I wiped my face and stood, ready for all the hell Yarorz could give me. I was surprised when I saw Kel. He was alone and he looked so scared for me, but he looked relieved too. He crashed up out of the water and grabbed me, asked if I was alright. He and Yzlo seemed to know I'd run away that night sooner or later. Yzlo was back at the camp covering for us. If we were discovered missing, he would tell the others that we'd just gone off to pee or something. I looked at Kel and I had never been so grateful in my life to have him as a friend.

"We had already met Zaldon around this time," Loryn said, pausing to glance at Lynny, "but we weren't that close to him yet. I don't think Zaldon even went on that camping trip. Melgo and Gurwin didn't get along. Because of Zaldon, they were almost always at each other's throats. And of course, no one trusted Zaldon yet because he was a foreigner. Didn't matter that he was just a kid." Loryn shook his head and laughed. "Wolves can be so fucking stupid sometimes. Zaldon was always the gentlest . . ."

Loryn's voice trailed off as he gazed thoughtfully into the distant trees. He didn't know it, but Lynny was watching him closely and smiling. It was hitting Lynny for the first time just how much Loryn cared about his friends. He wanted to pull Loryn into a rough hug for this sweet affection toward his brother, but resisting the urge to do so, he busied himself with his pipe.

"Go on. What about Kel? He had come for you."

"Oh." Loryn blinked and came back to earth. He smiled as he remembered. "Yeah. And in that moment, when Kel hugged me tight and told me everything was gonna be okay - in that moment, I knew that he would always be there for me. He had never really hugged me before. I had always thought he was cute and I had kissed his face all the time to make him mad, but I never took it farther than that. I always knew Gurwin would beat the living daylights outta Kel if he found out I was hugging his son. Gurwin always hated me as much as he hated Zaldon. So I always laid off Kel. You see why I would be surprised that he was hugging me."

"I do."

"So when he hugged me, at first I just stood there. But it was nice, feeling his body against mine. I hugged him back and my heart started beating hard. Kel was always shorter than me and smaller, so his ear was near my chest. He could hear my heart just flying." Loryn laughed. "So he pulled back and looked at me. He said something, but I didn't hear because all I could hear was this roaring in my ears. I didn't know it then, but it was my heart. I looked into his eyes, and then suddenly . . . I kissed him."

"Did he let you?" said Lynny, and they grinned at each other: they were both well acquainted with how stubbornly in denial Kel could be about his feelings toward males.

"For about two minutes," returned Loryn, smiling. "And, god, they were the longest two minutes of my life. Kel wasn't the first boy I had ever kissed or even the first pup. But it was so damn sweet that he might as well have been. I didn't want to stop, but I could feel that Kel was getting scared. He had actually started to kiss me back. He had moaned and everything. But after those first two minutes, he seemed to realize what was happening. He pulled back all red in the face and wiped my kiss away with the back of his wrist. He looked confused, as if he didn't know what to do with himself, as if he didn't know if he should go back to kissing me or drown himself in the river. I told him I wouldn't tell anyone. He stammered something and wadded as fast as he could into the water. I just stood there watching him swim away."

"With your heart now in his teeth."

Loryn laughed. "Yeah. Maybe he's still got it - though Kira has a chunk of it in her own teeth these days."

They sat together in silence as the world slowly darkened around them, passing the pipe back and forth, locked in their own thoughts.

"So what now, Loryn?" Lynny said after a pause. "Should I worry about you or not? Kira says you aren't sleeping."

Loryn's ears pricked forward. He had no idea Lynny was so concerned that he'd been keeping tabs on him through Kira. He stared at Lynny.

"Loryn," Lynny said, smoke hissing from his lips, "whether you realize it or not, there are a great many wolves that care about you, myself included. If anything happened to you, you have no idea what it would do to Kel and Zaldon, and I couldn't stand by and watch their pain when I could have stopped it. Kira and Yzlo are also worried. Aliona even asked me to corner you on my next visit. Kel said I should fuck you. And I'm seriously thinking about it." He puffed on the pipe again, not looking at Loryn.

Loryn looked away, not knowing what to say. "Lynny, I . . . There's nothing to worry about. I'm happy for Kel. And what you've said to me about Eno has helped me to finally stop . . . beating myself up." He admitted the last part with a miserable smile.

Lynny grunted but didn't seem too convinced.

After another pause, Loryn said in amusement, "Did Kel really tell you to fuck me?"

Lynny chuckled. "He said for me to fuck you for him. That we both needed it. Idella died years ago, Loryn. I have been traveling since she passed, searching for some peace that did not exist. And in all that time . . . I never touched a wolf. Wolves who remembered my mother offered their daughters to me. Others offered their male slaves. One sick perve offered me his seven-year-old son and I had to whoop some ass --"

Loryn laughed at what was obviously a joke.

"--but I never touched any of them. I didn't want anyone after Idella. I was looking for her all those years, I believe that now. I couldn't accept that she had . . . gone."

Loryn gazed sympathetically at Lynny, who was puffing on his pipe with a sad frown.

"So you haven't had sex in how long?"

"I wanna say five years," Lynny answered, not looking at Loryn. "Idella . . . she was so sick. She wanted to stop . . . so . . . you know." He shrugged dismally.

Imagining life without Kira, Loryn thought he understood: if he had to bury his wife, he wouldn't want to touch another either. Still, it was shocking. Most males Loryn knew turned to sex in their grief, and in the comfort of a stranger's arms, they forgot for a moment the suffering that thrived within them. But Lynny had done the opposite: Lynny had chosen to live with his anguish.

"Lynny . . . why couldn't Zaldon . . .?"

"It was too late by the time Yuri got there. She came with Zaldon and Julyan. But it was just too late. Idella had been carrying it for a long time, the sickness. She would have these little pains, and I would massage her, and they would go away. So we thought it was nothing. But then it just got worse and worse . . ." Lynny shook his head, and when his lashes angled down and blinked furiously, Loryn knew he was holding back tears. "There was a moment when Zaldon thought he'd caught whatever she had. But he told me it was alright. He'd just had a cold."

Lynny looked at Loryn and smiled when the latter cupped his face.

"So Kel said we should fuck," Loryn said, gazing into those dark eyes. "I guess he just wants to see the pair of us happy. He wants us to comfort each other because he can't. Sounds like him."

"Yeah, I know."

Loryn dropped his paw from Lynny's face. They sat in silence a moment.

"So did you want to?" Lynny asked after another pause. He tipped the ashes from his pipe and sniffed against the cold air. "Like I said, I've always wanted you, Loryn. You should know that, handsome thing."

Loryn gave a half-smile as he stared at the snow. "Yeah, I kinda knew. But . . . Kira won't like it. I can only have Kel. That's my limit or I'm gone. And besides, after what happened the last time I fucked around, I wouldn't hurt Kira again for all the dick and pussy in the world."

"I'm not offering all the dick and pussy in the world - just my dick and Kira's pussy."

Loryn's head snapped around.

"I already told you," went on Lynny, tucking the pipe away in his cloak. "I talked to Kira while you were out. I've been talking to her for years, actually. We exchanged letters all about you and what we could do to snap you out of it. I told her what Kel said, and it was her idea for me to sleep with you really. She's tired of seeing you in pain too, Loryn. She wants to do something to make you happy again. And it doesn't take a genius to know what makes you happy."

Loryn laughed. "Oh, god." He dropped his face into his paws, unable to believe what he was hearing. He felt Lynny's big fingers massaging his mane when the white wolf went on,

"So I agreed to do it. Kel invited me to move into his and Aliona's old hut so I could keep an eye on you and the kids. Kira likes the idea of having me so close and so does Ohana. Zane was also for it, and I'm not against seeing Mio and Zee on a daily basis --"

"So what?" Loryn said, lifting his head incredulously. "You're gonna move to our village and fuck me and Kira on a regular basis? Be our secret lover? Or just mine? I don't believe this shit - does Kel really think you're supposed to replace him?" Suddenly angry, Loryn shot up and kicked the snow viscously.

"Glad to see you're so happy for Kel," Lynny said dryly from where he was still sitting.

Loryn's back tensed. "It's just - I never expected him to leave me. He was always the one wolf - everyone else could go. In fact, I expected them to. But Kel? Kel was forever."

"Loryn," Lynny said gently behind him, and Loryn knew without turning that Lynny was now standing. "Nothing is forever, baby."

Loryn bit his lip. Lynny had never used that intimate word when speaking to him before. It suddenly hit Loryn that Lynny used to talk to his wife in that manner. A soft, surrendering manner. Idella had probably been the only one who could take the command out of Lynny. Standing there listening as Lynny drew close, Loryn wondered if Lynny had ever spoken to Kel in that yielding voice or if that voice was only reserved for the select few wolves who would not succumb to Lynny's bossiness.

Loryn closed his eyes when he felt Lynny come up behind him. Unlike Loryn and Kel, Lynny had kept his hard, rippling belly, and his big sex brushed against Loryn's back. Loryn swallowed when the soft head of that cock nudged him: Lynny was hard. He felt Lynny's warm kiss on his neck, and suddenly, Lynny's fingers were massaging his cock, coaxing him toward an erection. Loryn's brows pressed together. He had not known a male's touch there since Kel left so long ago.

"Lynny, I . . ."

"Like it?"

"God, yes . . ." Loryn whispered. His head fell back against Lynny's chest as those skilled fingers kept caressing.

"Then just close your eyes and let yourself feel pleasure. Let go of everything you have been carrying for so many years, Loryn. None of it matters now. The only thing that matters . . . is my touch."

Loryn shivered, and reaching out blindly, he braced himself against a tree.

"Good boy," Lynny whispered in his ear, and bracing his big paw against the small of Loryn's back, he sank himself in.

Loryn's fingers curled in the tree bark, ripping it loose as Lynny's big dick plunged that tight place between his ass cheeks. It was rare that Loryn was taken under his tail. He had not been taken there, in fact, since that day so many years ago when Kel came to make up with him at his house after an argument. He was so tight that it pinched to take Lynny in and he wished he had sucked Lynny off to make him slick or that Lynny had at least rimmed him. But Lynny was taking him dry, and he could feel it, his anus burning as it stretched to allow that big dick entrance. He clenched against Lynny's thrusting but relaxed when he felt those big fingers squeeze his dick in that steady massage. Lynny's fingers felt so good that Loryn came with a little cry. Loryn was surprised when Lynny took his hot seed, and after pulling out, used it to lubricate Loryn's ass.

"I've opened you," Lynny said breathlessly, "and now that you're all sticky, I can really get in. Here . . . give me your tits."

Loryn smiled. The command was back in that voice. He felt his dick swell upright again when Lynny pinched his nipples, riding him strong now and mercilessly deep. Their bodies moved together against the tree, flexing with muscles and straining in a silent struggle to increase the pleasure with each thrust. Lynny pressed so hard that the tree eventually shook, and Loryn found himself hugging it as he gasped and moaned and whispered Lynny's name. To have his own cum lubricating his ass felt amazing, and because of this, Lynny was able to get deliciously deep. He showered Loryn's neck with kisses and even licked his back as he fucked him, his paws did not for a moment stop their hungry caressing, and his deep grunts of ecstasy made pre-cum seep from Loryn's dick.

Eventually, Lynny locked his big arm around Loryn's throat, and dragging him down in the bushes, he fucked him so hard that the bushes rocked and the snow covering them sprayed the air. On his knees under Lynny and taking that cock with a strained face, Loryn really believed his friend about not getting any for five years. Lynny, in his misery, had been starved.

When they were both exhausted and laying breathless in the snow, Lynny pulled Loryn close, kissing his mane and playing in it. He ran his paw along Loryn's body, touching his hard chest and his ass and his thigh. He smoothed his paw along Loryn's tail and sighed as if to say that Loryn was so damned handsome.

"So is this going to be a regular thing?" Loryn wondered aloud after a few minutes of this doting affection.

"Kira asked me to look after you," Lynny answered. "But, no, this won't be a regular thing. Not unless you want it to be."

Laying in Lynny's arms, Loryn stared breathlessly at the slushy snow sprinkling the ground an inch from his eye. His back was to Lynny, but he could feel those warm, dark eyes calmly watching him. "No," he answered at last, "it won't be a regular thing. You can't replace Kel."

Lynny sounded relieved when he answered, "Good. Because I love comforting you, Loryn, but you can't replace Idella."

Loryn rolled over on his back, and they smiled at each other.

"But you're staying anyway." It wasn't a question.

"Said I'd look after everyone for Kel, and I will. Besides, if I don't stay, who's gonna look after me? I'm just ah kid, damn it." Lynny stuck his pipe in his teeth and grinned playfully.

Loryn closed his eyes and laughed. Looking at Lynny, he knew exactly why the big white wolf had chosen to stay: Norilyn would not want to return to the sun village and have to witness the joyous unity of Zaldon and his spouses while he still mourned Idella. It would be too much, being around and Kel and Aliona (the pair of whom Loryn was well aware Lynny often lusted after) and not being able to have them while his brother enjoyed their love and their bodies freely.

But there was one other thing Loryn had not counted on.

"And besides," Lynny added, leaning down close to Loryn, "I just like you."

Loryn's ears pricked forward in surprise when Lynny drew close and their lips touched. As Lynny lifted Loryn's face and the kiss grew more fervent, Loryn suddenly realized that he had just made a good friend.

"Since we won't be together like this anymore," Lynny said (and Loryn knew he meant sex), "at least let me clean you up some, stud. You're all sticky." He clapped his paw against Loryn's thigh to indicate the sticky mess of cum that had been smeared all over his most intimate places.

Loryn put his arms behind his head. "Be my guest." He let out a shocked laugh when Lynny grabbed him by the elbow and the thigh and flipped him over as easily as a female. On his stomach in the snow, his mouth fell open as that big, hot tongue curled against him, wiping him clean of cum but covering him at the same time in the nastiest pleasures. And as his ass, balls, and dick were bathed clean of all stickiness, Loryn suddenly knew that Lynny's friendship was the kind that was always going to stick.