Gortoz 'A Ran - Ch 36 - Pun intended...
#37 of Gortoz 'A Ran
That Sunday morning, I woke up by strange sounds I couldn't really place... I mumbled quietly to ask Terry what it was but I didn't get a response from him. And when I opened my eyes, I realized that Terry wasn't even next to me in bed. With all the sounds coming from downstairs, I couldn't really focus on falling asleep again and just closed my eyes when all of a sudden, I heard a loud thud and Terry yelling "Ow, son of a bitch!!"... "The hell is going on...?" I thought to myself but lazy as I am, I didn't get up to investigate and closed my eyes once more... Hey, don't blame me, I was still very sleepy and I'm a feline, it's in my blood to be lazy... Hehehe... A while later I heard him carefully walking up the stairs and when he entered my room, I saw that he held a tray with breakfast... I was a little baffled to say the least and sat upright in my bed as he placed the tray on my night stand... No one ever brought me breakfast in bed before... 'Morning, dude.' 'Hey, goodmorning... You're giving me breakfast in bed in my own house?' 'Yeah, figured you might be a little hungry. Had to sniff around your cupboards to find everything though. Hope you don't mind.' 'It's alright... That's so sweet of you, Terry...' 'Hehehe... I burned my hand in the process though...' 'Aww, you poor thing... C'mere...'
He sat on the bed next to me and I saw his hand had a little mark... 'Did you cooled your hand?' 'Yeah, I did...' 'Aww, I feel bad now...' 'Don't be so melodramatic, haha... So are you a tea or more of a coffee dude?' 'Both, prefer tea though.' 'Then I made the right choice.'
I looked at the plate and saw he made a bowl of scrambled eggs with bacon and chive with a couple of slices of toast, two tomatoes and a large baguette with ham and cheese, baked in the oven. It looked delicious and being the hearty eater that I am, I felt like eating everything up... But you know, I wasn't alone and it's considered to be rude to gobble everything up like that... 'So... You want the baguette or scrambled eggs and toast?' 'You pick first.' 'Uhm... It's difficult to choose.' 'I'll make it easy for you then. I'll take the baguette.' 'Good choice...' 'Hehehehe...'
I got hold of the bowl of scrambled eggs and we started eating. His scrambled eggs had a subtle hint of garlic and chive and it tasted really good with those slices of toast. I'm not the best cook around but I never managed to get my eggs so creamy the way Terry made them. As if he had a secret ingredient or something... 'These eggs are great...' I mumbled with my mouth full. 'Thanks.' 'No, really, I never manage to get my eggs so creamy. What's your secret?' 'Milk.' 'Milk?' 'Yeah. Add a little milk to make it creamy and fry the bacon 'till its brown and crispy. A secret my mom taught me when I was little.' 'Wow... Gotta remember that.' 'Haha, its not that hard, Ceylan...' 'I'm a terrible cook.' 'You can't be that bad.' 'No really, the only reason why I'm still alive is because I'm immune to my own cooking.' 'Hehehe...'
I finished my eggs and toast in no time while I watched how Terry took his time with his baguette... He just looked at me while he took little bites of his baguette deliberately, as if he was trying to tease me with that... Once he finished his baguette, I looked at him as it stayed silent... And there was only one thing that was going through my mind that morning... We weren't talking about the things that happened the night before and that felt a little strange to me, to be honest... As if we had to "review" one another based on our "performance"... I expected him to bring it up any second but he never did that morning... "Should I bring it up...?" And tell him what, how awesome he was in what he was doing...? I think he already knew how awesome he was... But what did he think about me...? Was there ever any satisfaction when he was pleasing the fuck out of me as he gave up his own...? "Does he expect me to do the same...?" I wasn't able to get any answers from him by the look on his face... And I wanted to, I wanted to pleasure him in any way I was able to, except not "all the way" yet... Hell, even a blowjob was too much to ask for... And it's not because I thought it was disgusting or anything but I was more afraid that I sucked so bad it that he didn't like it. Pun not intended... So yeah, afraid that he might not like it or something... And yes, the thought of giving him one also made me a little nervous. Which is why I didn't. And I know you go like; "You said it yourself that it isn't determined by the questions you ask yourself but rather on how you feel about it when it happens!" Yeah, yeah, I know, I know... But that's a lot harder than you think! But still... When I looked at Terry, I realized that I wasn't capable of doing that just yet but did, in fact, had the potential... And an idea is like a seed, planted in your brain... It grows out... And the seed was planted that morning... All I had to do was to wait until it grew out...
Terry never asked me to do anything he liked... He did hinted at the blowjob thing but wasn't forcing me at all... And I always felt a little guilty every time he got down on me... Of course, there were other things I did, like giving him a hand-job or let him play with my feet... Terry loved it whenever I gave him a nice foot-job but you know, after just a few days, that just didn't cut it anymore for me even though Terry always loved it. He never complained about it... Nevertheless, I felt that we had to move on, to explore each other in a new way except I didn't really know how... But despite that, things were going great for the two of us. For the rest of the week, Terry and I spend a lot of time together after school, usually at my place where we, uh... he, got down on me... And I absolutely loved it every time he did while I gave him the occasional foot-job or a hand-job... But the thought of me giving Terry a blowjob always came back to me at night... And I started to fantasize about it... But the truth about fantasies is that your mind always portrays it the way you want it to be... And from my experience, things were hardly ever the same as my fantasies... So I did my research by watching certain movies on how a woman was practicing to play the "meat whistle" on the internet, if you know what I mean... And I can honestly say that watching it was quite the turn on... The only question was however, would I still feel the same about it when I was doing it...? I had a lot of time to think about it until one night, it suddenly struck me... "It can't be that bad, right...?" And like I said, the seed was already planted... So... Yeah... Things were going great and all with Terry and me but I had the feeling that we had to move on to something more ambitious... But I have zero experience with these kind of things with males and I figured I needed help by finding out... So I turned to the person who knew the most about these kind of things...
´You know, when you asked me about my expertise, I didn't expect you to ask me how to give a guy a blowjob. I don't know if I should be flattered or offended by that.´ ´You obviously did it more often than I ever did, Sam...´ ´I've only been with two guys in my life...! You make it sound like I'm a total slut...!´ ´I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that... But you're still more, uh... "experienced" than I am...´ ´Hm...´ ´Please...? I need your advice... I just have no idea where to start... ' 'Okay, so... You really serious about this...? The internet is full of useful information too, you know...' 'Yes, I'm serious...' '... For real...?' 'Yes...! I know it's quite embarrassing and awkward but...' '... Are you alone?' 'Yes, are you...?' 'Yeah, almost, hold on, I'll put you down for a sec...'
I heard on the phone that she put me down and talked to someone, shortly followed by the sound of a door closing... Then I guessed she flopped down on her bed when she took the phone again... 'So uh... You seriously ask me for my advice...? Your not trying to pull some prank on me or...' 'Look, Sam, if you don't want to talk about this kind of thing, just tell me... The internet doesn't tell me what it's like...' 'I know, I know but it's just that no one ever asked me advice about these kind of things before...' 'Yeah...' 'So... uh... I mean, haven't you ever thought of just trying it and like, ask him what he wants or something...?' 'Of course I did but...' 'You're too nervous to actually do it...' 'Yes...' 'This is gonna be difficult... Uhm... Have you ever tried, uh... "practising" it...?' 'Practising...?' 'Yeah, with a banana... Or a cucumber...' 'Oh! Uh... Well, I did, yeah...' 'With a banana...?' '... Is it relevant for you to know what I used to practise?' 'No, haha, but I don't want you to expect that his "thing" will taste like a banana...' '... I used a dildo...' 'A what?!' 'You heard me...' 'I think I did, yeah...'
"Oh my god, this is so embarrassing..." There was a little tension between the two of us to be honest... We've had these kind of talks before but never over the phone... Whenever Sam and I were together, we saw each other but we couldn't over the phone, which was the cause of the tension... I wasn't able to look in her eyes that evening... 'Okay, okay... So... Uh... What did your mom said...?' 'My mom? Catherine...? I didn't talked to her about it...' 'Hm...' 'So yeah...' 'I don't really understand of what you're making a fuzz about, Ceylan... It's not really that any different... Except for the shape and size... I mean, be honest to him. Tell him that you never sucked a guy off before. Does he know your bi-sexual...?' 'No, he doesn't. I don't think he expects it from me...' 'Then you should tell him!' 'What?! No, absolutely not!' 'Why not?' 'Because things are finally going as they're supposed to go! I fucked it up many times before and well, Terry...' 'Yes...?' 'Terry's always been there for me, even when I wasn't there for him... And we had a lot of fights and everything and I just don't wanna risk it now that everything is going so well between the two of us... And... it's very serious between us and I feel that by telling him, I'd be risking it all...' 'How can you even say that? It's not a risk, more like a relationship's perk! I mean, which guy doesn't dream of his girlfriend having it off with another girl?' 'No, you don't understand, Sam, it's not that easy!' 'Why not?' 'Because I made him change, for me... Terry was always honest to me, told me about his previous girls because I asked him and even though I appreciate his honesty, I just...' 'Wished you never heard it in the first place...' 'Yeah... I heard things I'd rather not wanted to hear... And even though he didn't went into details, it makes me feel as if I'll never be good enough to do the things he wants me to do... But I want to... And I still do...' 'You changed too because of him...' 'Yes... I did...' 'Then just do it, you know...' 'What do you mean...?' 'Have sex with him...' 'I don't understand...' 'You know the reason why some guys are players...? And why Terry changed?' 'No...?' 'It's because they're looking for something new and exciting in a girl. And some girls give themselves straight away so there are hardly any new things to discover. The two of you have been together for almost half a year now and just a few days ago, he got down on you for the very first time.' 'S-So...?' 'You've sent me pictures of Terry and I admit, he's a hottie to look at... And I bet if there was a girl he had his eyes on, he'd get laid with her within two weeks. But now he met you and after half a year later, he still didn't get laid with you.' 'So you're saying that... Once I slept with him, he would find someone else...?' 'No, I'm not saying that, Ceylan... What I mean is, is that he never met a girl who could "resist" him, if you know what I mean...' 'Not sleeping with him...?' 'Yes! For more than half a year, you kept him at a distance, which is good! Because he gets to know you better and that you're not so easy as all the other girls he's ever been with. Because he knows that there is so much more to discover about you.' 'That's what Terry said as well...' 'Then what are you afraid of? You're absolutely gorgeous and a very sweet girl to be with... And even though you didn't have many relationships before and all them were with girls, I think you'll do just fine... Be honest, keep telling him what's on your mind and don't ever loose the focus on sex in your relationship... I know you chose that sex doesn't come first place but it certainly helps when you're enjoying him physically... It's healthy to have good sex in a relationship... It only draws the two of you closer than you already are... And not to mention, a lot of fun...' 'Heh...' 'And from what you've told me last Sunday, you already experienced it first hand... Was he really that good...?' 'Oh yes, definitely... No one ever stuck their tongue in me before...' 'Do you fantasize about doing the same to him...?' 'He doesn't h- wait, no! Eww! I'm not sticking my tongue in his tailhole!' 'What?! No! That's not what I mean, stupid! I mean giving him oral...' 'Oh...! Yeah, I do...' 'And you still want my advice...' 'Well, yeah of course...' 'I don't really know how to explain it without showing you...' 'You can turn the webcam on...' 'No...! There are people in the other room...!' 'Ah...' 'I guess you'll have to do it yourself then. Alright, time for a little practical assignment.' 'A what?' 'Get your dildo...!' 'What, no! You want me to suck it off on the phone?!' 'It wouldn't be much of a "practical assignment" if you didn't practised it.' 'You serious...?' 'Yes, you wanted my advice, didn't you? Go get it.'
I sighed reluctantly and opened my drawer where I hid my realistically shaped dildo... It's roughly about the same size as Terry's "little friend"... I put the phone down and went to the bathroom where I let warm water run over the dildo and then patted it dry with a clean towel... And so, I made my way back to my room and sat on my bed as I got hold of my phone again... Looking at my dildo again made me realize how silly it was to actually follow her instructions on the phone... Wasn't there some sort of a manual in .pdf format that she could've sent me...? 'Okay, I got it but I refuse to suck it off on the phone...' 'Alright, alright, then don't suck it off...' 'Yeah, okay...' 'First you fondle it a little until it gets erect.' 'I got that bit...' 'Alright, next, do a little stroking with your tongue. Going up and down slowly.' 'Uh-huh... And then stir the fried onions in a pan and add the meat.' 'Huh? What??' 'I'm sorry, you make it sound like a cooking-show or something.' 'Shut up, it's awkward enough for me to tell you.' 'It's awkward for me to imagine that I'm doing it.' 'Alright, alright... Okay, a nice thing to do is to suck his balls... Suck it lightly otherwise you'll hurt him.' 'This dildo doesn't have any balls...' 'Oh... Use your imagination then.' 'And what if you're just licking it...? Like, licking a pussy...?' 'Sure, why not...?' 'Okay... Then what...?' 'If you want to put it in your mouth, be careful with your teeth... Don't bite him or something just because you think it's kinky; that'll hurt him. A lot. Also, be careful not to let your teeth touch his shaft when you're bobbing your head up and down... The trick is to suck it when you do... That's what gets most guys off. And that's about it, really...' 'And what if they do...?' 'What do you mean...?' 'What does it taste like...?' 'I can't tell, it's different with every guy. But it's always a little salty, I guess.' 'Do you, uh... swallow, Sam...?' 'Uh... Yes... Haha! But of course, you don't have to. If you put it in your mouth all the way down and he cums, you wont be able to taste it. Or just spit it out somewhere...' 'That'll make a mess... So... A deepthroat means that you wouldn't be able to taste it...?' 'Yes, haha...' 'I've made Terry reach his climax before but... I can't really imagine what it's like when he cums in my mouth... I mean... Would it be a lot or...?' 'That also depends on the guy. Buuuuuuuut I'd say about a teaspoon full of his stuff...' 'Okay...' 'The trick is to be creative... Try things out to see if the two of you like it... And well, that's all there is to it... You can also use a flavoured condom if you like.' 'What kind of flavours?' 'Strawberry, lemon, mango, chocolate, hell, even curry flavoured. You name it! I'm sure there's something there that fancies your taste...' 'Hopefully...' 'Of course there is... When do you get to see him again...?' 'I see him every day and after classes are over, he comes to my house... Simon and Catherine are still on vacation and they wont be coming home 'till next week so...' 'You got lots of time then...' 'Yeah...' 'Look, I know you're nervous but there's absolutely nothing to be worried about. You'll do great if you treat him the same the way you always treated me...' 'Heh...'
And with that, it stayed silent for a while as I already knew where this conversation was heading... It happened every once in a while whenever Sam and I were talking to each other, either on the phone or during our MSN conversations... And sometimes, I got a little emotional... At some point, I heard she took a deep breath... 'I miss you, Ceylan...' 'I know... I miss you too, babe...' 'Maybe...' 'Hm...?' 'No, no, it's silly, Ceylan...' 'No, tell me...' 'Heh... I, uh... I had this dream a few days ago... That you and I were having sex again... And that Terry was watching us... And it's been on my mind ever since and I was wondering if...' 'Yes...?' 'How you would feel like if we... You, me and Terry... well...' 'Have a threesome...?' 'Yes...?' 'What...?' 'D-Don't get me wrong, I mean... It's not like I would, you know... Jump on Terry or something but... if Terry's okay with it and I know him well enough to do something like this, I'd like you to know that I want to... It's just the idea that you and I would do it and... the idea of being watched just... really turns me on... To just, you know... Warm you up for him...' 'I don't know about this, Sam... I really don't... Please don't do this, not now...' 'You remember those rules back when we were still together...?' 'Yes...?' 'It wouldn't be any different...' 'Look... Terry and I are together and things were difficult enough as they were... I'm not jumping to any conclusion because I don't know where we'll be by the time you graduate and come back to Ravello... If I'm single, I'd do it... I'd take you back and make all of your fantasies come true... It would be so much more difficult if I'm already taken and I doubt if anyone is willing to share me... And even if they would, it would still be difficult to see you having it off with Terry...' 'I don't have to, you know... It's just you I want it to happen with...' 'Sammi... I'm usually very open minded about these kind of things but... y-you know...? I'd be risking a lot of things if we did... And I'd rather not want any of that...' 'I understand, I shouldn't have asked you...' 'It's okay...' 'It's just that... Several weeks ago, we had a frat party in one of the houses that me and David went over to. And David knows I have these bi-sexual tendencies and... while we were there, he talked to some girl and she took me upstairs... And at first, it was very exciting and all for me but... Once I was naked on the bed, she started to kiss me between my legs but I didn't liked it all...' 'Why, what happened...?' 'Nothing, that's the thing... You always whispered in my ear that you loved me and... The only thing she whispered was that she was going to fuck me real good... I normally like that kind of stuff but it just didn't felt right... I only spent several minutes with her until I got dressed again... You're the first girl I've ever had sex with and our first time in the gym was just... You know...? And I just want it all back...' 'Heh... I know...' 'So... Heh...' 'Does David make you happy, Sam...?' 'We're not a couple... He's just a close friend of mine...' 'Does he...?' 'Yeah, he does... I like being with him...' 'Then you should focus on him instead of me... The only thing I can do from here is to call you up and talk to you... I wish I was able to promise so many things to you, Sam, but I can't... I just can't because I can't predict what'll happen when you get back...' 'Neither can I...' 'Then don't... Why would you make a promise when you know you can't keep it...?' 'Heh, I don't know... False hope, I guess...' 'It doesn't have to be... But you need to put those feelings aside for now and focus on what you have with David... Focus on what's the most important to you... Don't let it go to waste like I almost did with Terry...' 'Heh...' 'You don't think I miss it...? I miss it too, you know... We don't have to label ourselves as lovers because we're not... We're just two friends who happened to have some fun with each other, that's all... And I don't think there's anything wrong with that... But not everyone thinks like us, which is why you'll have to be careful with what you're doing and what you're saying...' 'Friends with benefits...' 'Yes, something like that... We go a little deeper than just being friends...'
That particular phone-call didn't end the way I expected it to be... While Samantha's advice and tips proved to be very valuable, somehow, somewhere, we started to talk about "us" instead... What we had and that we wanted it back, like it used to be... Now that I was with Terry, I was still looking at girls the way I used to, that didn't change a bit, except I had to keep it a secret from Terry... If Samantha didn't go to college and we were still hanging out together, I believed my relationship with Terry would've never been there... It's always the never-ending struggle to choose... And I can't choose... I love Sam just as much as I love Terry... But Samantha wasn't with me in that period of my life so I had to focus on someone else, which was Terry while Sam focused on David, a guy she fancied... And no matter how deeply in love the two of us were on our boyfriends, we couldn't help longing for each other like we once used to, simply because of one thing; Terry and David weren't girls... To be in love with a personality is one thing but being in love with someone of a different gender was something entirely different and new to me... And I know Samantha wanted it back because sleeping with a girl was all new and exciting for her... I was longing to have sex with a girl again simply because it was the only thing I knew... Samantha and I already came to the conclusion that what we had was never going to return ever since she left for college... And I guess the two of us never really had any peace with that, despite the fact that we were in love with someone else... But Samantha had to focus on David just as much as I had to focus on Terry... But even though I wasn't able to promise that we'd be together again one day, I did promised her that I still love her deeply and that I'll always be her friend, in any way imaginable...
Even though Samantha and I missed each other dearly, the two of us felt that we had to move on. To focus on the people who we were with us at the time. But we usually ended these emotional conversations with gossips and jokes and then everything was fine again. Each and every time I saw Terry, I felt so great... And every time he visited my house, I felt even greater... Hihi... Still, I wanted to take it easy and to wait for the weekend for him to spend the night with me again... The week seemed to pass by slowly and I just wanted the days to go by faster... But that Friday-afternoon, after my classes were finally over for the week, I waited an hour for Terry... And when I saw him, I ran up towards him and literally jumped in his arms and kissed him all over his face... I was so caught up with him that I didn't even notice Nicole standing next to him... And when I finally did, she looked at me with a weak smile and walked off while Terry and I watched how she left...
We got in Terry's car and drove off to town where we did some groceries and made our way back to my place to make some dinner. And well, like I said before, I'm a terrible cook so we made something idiot-proof; soup out of a can. It wasn't all that great but it was still a lot better than I could ever possibly make. We didn't had any plans to go out so we watched movies downstairs instead. But at some point, I dragged him upstairs where the two of us took a shower together... And yes, we were fondling each other when we did and while we were washing each other, I paid extra attention between his legs for knowing what I was about to do... After we dried ourselves off, Terry puts his boxershorts back on and made his way back to my room while I stayed in the bathroom... I looked at myself in the mirror while Sam's words were echoing throughout my mind... "You're absolutely gorgeous... You'll do great if you treat him the same the way you always treated me..." I closed my eyes for a second, took a deep breath and slowly exhaled... And then I made my way to my room...
When I got there, I noticed Terry was sitting on my bed, smiling innocently as he gestured me to sit next to him... Once I sat next to him, he started to kiss my neck and gently fondled between my legs again... And while he was gently pushing me down on my back, his fingers were going inside of me while he was kissing my breasts, slowly going down to my stomach until he positioned himself in front of me and spread my legs... These little nibbles he gave me on my inner thighs were just downright exciting... With just two fingers, he spread my pussy lips and gently started to lick up and down... It was quite enjoyable to say the least... Especially when he started to finger me again while he kept kissing it as I caressed his head... "Oh god, this so great..." Until I suddenly remembered that I was supposed to do something this time... So I gently nudged his chin up and made him face me... 'T-Terry...?' 'Hm...?' 'It's not that I don't enjoy it but... I think wanna do things a little different tonight...' 'Oh...? What do you have in mind then...?' 'Do you, uh... Do you have any flavoured condoms...?' 'Nope...' 'Oh, uh... A regular one perhaps...?' 'No, not with me, no. They're at my place.'
"Shit... Okay, okay, don't panic, don't panic... Uhm... Shit...!!" Like I said, nothing ever goes the way I portray it... So I sat upright on the edge of the bed while Terry kept looking at me... I patted on the bed-sheet as a gesture for him to sit next to me on the edge of my bed... So he did, as he put an arm around my shoulders and gently kissed my neck... 'What exactly do you want to do differently then...?' 'I feel like returning the favour to you... But uh... I need to be honest...' 'What's up?' 'I never gave anyone a blowjob before so uh... Don't expect too much from it... I'll give it a try if you want me to...' 'Yeah, okay...' 'But you'll have to tell me what you like and what you don't like... I think I'm not any good at it so uh...' 'Well hey, it doesn't matter if you suck at it, as long as you have fun sucking.' 'Haha, pun intended...?' 'Most definitely.' 'I guess it's true though...' 'Hehehe...' 'So, uh... You want to lie down or...' 'Whatever works best with you...' 'Alright...'
I got off my bed kneeled before him on the ground with my head between his legs, placing my hands on his thighs... I already saw that it was in a semi-erect state and well, once I slowly pulled his boxershorts down, it revealed its tip and I couldn't help but to giggle quietly... I looked at Terry while he looked down on me for a while... 'I can't suck at it when I can't pull your boxer-shorts down, sweetheart...' 'Again with the puns...' 'Perhaps its better when you stand up...'
So he did... Once he got up, he looked down on me and I saw the smile he had on his face... And that's when I knew I was doing the right thing even though I didn't know if I was going to like it... Once I looked at his package again, I saw it bulging in his boxer-shorts... With the tips of my fingers, I gently caressed his balls as I kissed his stomach, slowly going down... Terry saw that I was nervous... And all he did was caressing my head when I looked to him again... At that moment, I slowly pulled his boxer-shorts down... And there it was, his little friend dangling right in front of me... I gently started to caress his balls and stroked his shaft, just like I always did... And I did that for a while as I was staring at his fuzzy nuts... At least it didn't smelled like cheese-onion crisps down there, like I always imagined it would smell and taste like... More like delicious sweet mango from the shower gel I used on him... 'Play with my balls a little...' 'I'm working on it...' 'Okay, okay, haha...'
I kept stroking him while I kept looking in his eyes and what I saw is just something I can't describe... So I smiled back at him and did what he told me to do... By lifting his erection up, I had a good view on his nuts... Once I closed my eyes, I brought my face closer to it and gently started to kiss his fuzzy balls... It was a lot easier for me than I imagined it would be... I didn't think it was any different than kissing his forehead or something... And that gave me enough confidence to try and lick them carefully... Gently pressing the tip of my tongue against it, going up and slowly... Whenever I looked up, I could see that Terry was enjoying it... And that's when I finally I started to suck one of testicles... Gently... Had to be careful of my teeth... But everything was going fine when I did... Seeing the look on his was so wonderful to see, knowing I did something he always wanted me to do... Switching between his testicles only seemed to add to his pleasures... And normally, my mind was running with a lot of questions but that night, none was going through my mind for the first time ever... The only thing that mattered was that Terry enjoyed what I was doing, to show him no other girl could ever compete with me... Lacking the experience only seemed to be in my advantage because he told me what to do and I obeyed like the good lil' kitten that I was... The idea of him being in control over me didn't seemed to be such of an issue anymore because I trusted him the most... I started to like it because it made me realize I was pleasuring him... 'Don't expect too much from it? Haha, you're a liar, Ceylan...' 'Hmmm... You like it...?' 'Obviously, dude... You feel like putting it in your mouth yet...?' 'Don't rush me...' 'You're a teasing kitten...' 'I thought you were into that kind of stuff.' 'Teasing you, yes. Not getting teased...' 'Then perhaps you could consider this as a little payback with all the teasing you did with me...' 'You're evil...' 'Hihi...'
I gave him a wink and smiled at him when he looked down on me again... And just like that, I continued where I left off... Stroking him, touching him, licking him... It wasn't until I started to lick the shaft of his penis when I finally start to hear his breathing... His penis only seemed to get harder... And what I was about to do was something I saw in those video's a lot... So I pulled his foreskin back and pressed my lips against the tip of his penis, gently kissing it... Those sweet, tender kisses I gave him seemed to do the trick... He placed his hand on my cheek and caressed it with his thumb as he was just looking down on me... There was no need to rush it... And like they say, the first impression is everything... And I felt as if I had to make my mark... To prove to him that I was way better than any girl he's ever been with before... That's when I realized I had to my best... To do whatever it took for me to pleasure him... So I opened my mouth... And slowly took it in my mouth as my soft lips touched his shaft, going up and down very slowly... Samantha told me it wasn't any different than licking a pussy... So I did what I always did whenever I got down on a girl... I pressed my tongue against it and slowly made circular motions around his tip... Every once in a while, I felt him squirting a bit... I thought the taste of it would be absolutely horrible but it wasn't anything I thought it would be... Like I said, nothing ever goes the way I portray things... Terry's penis tasted a little sweet and metallic... A taste I might've learned to like... It's simply a matter of acquired taste, just like with coffee... 'Dude?' 'Mhuyeah?' 'Don't talk with your mouth full...' 'Oh... Haha...' 'You feel like going on the bed instead...? Might be more comfortable.' 'Sure thing...'
And with that, he got down on my bed with his thing pointing in the air, curving a little to the left... So I got on the bed myself and continued where I left off, putting it in my mouth again... Confidence was the only thing I felt growing inside of me... How can something like this can make you feel so aroused...? The feeling only seemed to get better the deeper I was taking it... What made it so good...? Was it the taste...? The idea of doing something I thought I'd never lowered myself to...? To be submissive even though that totally goes against my nature...? The fact that I realized Terry enjoyed what I was doing to him...? All of them played a part and that just made my confidence grow... But I guess I got a little too enthusiastic at some point when I suddenly heard him... 'Ow, ow!! Dude! Watch the teeth!' 'S-Sorry...!'
I kept looking at him as I stroked him gently and several moments later, he seemed to be fine again... So I continued once more, carefully this time... Every once in a while, I looked up to see how he was doing but all he did was to look down on me again and started to caress my hair... Every now and then, I had to remove my hair from out of my face, totally missing every sign of him reaching his climax... As I was going down again, I felt with my tongue that his tip was swelling... His quiet groan was his climax and it sounded nothing like mine... The fluids felt a little watery at first until I felt him squirting something a little thicker in my mouth... I thought that it would pass my taste-buds but his stuff actually came on my tongue... And Sam was right... It did tasted a little salty... I don't really know how to describe it but the taste also had something metallic and sweetness to it... But there was just one thing I didn't take into consideration... Where was I gonna leave it...? I looked for a place to spit it out somewhere but truth was, there wasn't any unless I wanted his stuff on my bed-sheets or pillows... And just because I thought it wasn't that bad as I thought it would be didn't mean I wanted to wade in it... "Fuck it, just do it... You came this far already..." I closed my eyes and swallowed it... Smoothly, it went down my throat... I looked at Terry and couldn't resist to laugh at his expression... He had his eyes closed and had a huge satisfied smile on his face... So I got down next to Terry and cuddled as I held him close... 'Did you like it...?' 'I can't believe you swallowed, haha... Wow...' 'I take that as a yes... Hihi...' 'Did you...?' 'It wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be... But yeah... I liked doing it...' 'What made you change your mind...?' 'Did my research, asked for advice... Watched certain movies on the internet...' 'You watched porn...!?' 'Well, yes... Some girls actually like that kind of stuff... And it proved to be useful to me...' 'Hehehehe, wow... Never expected that from you...' 'Let's just say I did my homework...' 'Awesome...'
His smile never disappeared from his face that night... Even when he fell asleep later on, his smile didn't seem to disappear... Once I turned the lamp on my night stand off and my room was filled with darkness, I clenched on to Terry as I stared in blank space as I rubbed my feet against his... It's strange to have realized how it happened so all of a sudden... I couldn't help myself to feel proud for what I managed to accomplish... Feeling satisfied about the way our sex life was heading to... Sam was right about everything... Good sex is healthy in a relationship... It only strengthen one's bond... But the greatest achievement was to finally give him something in return, even though it was something small... And way too quick... But that didn't matter to me... I felt his strong arm clenched around me and all the prejudices and all the scepticism I felt just disappeared... Slowly but steady, the wall of burdens I felt crumbled down one bit at a time... It used to be so high that it was impossible for me to climb over... And over the months, a lot of it fell down... There was still a small wall standing in my way... But I figured I would just simply leap over it when the time was right... Because it wasn't a matter of "if" anymore, but a question of when... No longer did I had to ask myself questions... No longer did I had to doubt his motives... No longer did my mind played tricks on me anymore... I felt liberated... Free of all the worries and insecurities I've ever felt... Terry was right when he said that sex didn't always had to be a negative experience... That you don't have to feel ashamed when you surrender to it and actually enjoy it for once with someone you're deeply in love with... Realizing the truth about the love I shared with him and what felt right to do was a wonderful feeling... I was smiling at him that night as I caressed his head, for realizing that many more nights would follow... And I too, fell asleep with a satisfied smile on my face...