Mixed Feelings - Chapt. 1
#1 of Mixed Feelings
This is a new series I've decided to start due to recent events. I hope you guys enjoy. Let me know if you think I should do more.
Alex stared at his paper as he day dreamed about his crush; a fox named Richard Coats. Richard was a rather large, thick bodied fox with deep red fur, green eyes, and short black headfur. The two boys had been best friends since middle school and they were rarely separated for any reason. In the past few months, Alex had developed a crush on Richard that got stronger every single day and at this point, he knew that he'd have to tell Richard about it soon. The only thing he was worried about was whether or not Richard would still accept him.
'The guy is my best friend.' Alex though 'I'm sure he won't make a big deal about it.' The bell to signal the end of 1st period rang and Alex didn't even realize that he hadn't done any work all class period. A small golden retriever put her hand on the black wolf's shoulder and asked concernedly "Alex, are you okay? You didn't move an inch all class. You just sat there looking at the paper." Alex shook his head and adjusted his glasses. "Yeah, I'm fine, Taylor. I just... Need to get some sleep." He said with a lazy smile "I was tossing and turning all night and barely got any at all" Taylor smiled and shook her head. "Ok whatever you say, tough guy. Say hi to Richard for me!" The petite retriever scurried out of the classroom to get to her next class. Alex froze at the sound of his best friend's name.
It struck fear and nervousness into his heart now that he was getting feelings for the guy. 'There's no use' Alex though. 'If I tell him, he'll just think I'm weird and even if he was gay, he already told me why he'd never date a wolf' Alex sighed and gathered his belongings to go to his Government class.
Richard greeted Alex at the door to the class with a large, friendly embrace. "What's going on midget?" He exclaimed. He called Alex a midget because he was the size of an average tiger, while Alex was the normal size for a wolf.
"You know I hate it when you call me that." Alex said as he returned the embrace. "Just because YOU'RE on steroids..."he trailed off and they both had a hearty laugh as Richard playfully punched Alex in the shoulder. The two boys went to sit in their respective seats that were right across from each other, intensifying Alex's nervousness. He began to fidget with his pencil while he watched Richard unpack his things on the desk. 'He's so perfect...' Alex thought. He tried to control his facial expressions but apparently it hadn't worked because Richard shot him a confused look and asked, "You ok, Alex? You look like you had a bad burrito or something." It didn't register in Alex's head that Richard had been talking until the large fox stood up and clapped his paws forcefully right in front of Alex's face.
Alex jolted back from his fantasy world with that crude gesture and looked around. Every single person in the class was staring at him as if he were some kind of monster. He cleared his throat and slowly turned his head from one side of the class to the other. A somewhat muffled "What?" was all he could manage to say before Richard got incredibly close to his face to look into his eyes. Alex kept looking away in fear that he might end up in his fantasy world again from looking into the brilliantly green eyes of his best friend.
Richard grabbed Alex's head to hold it still. "Stop moving, dude." He said as the government teacher, Mr. Burns, walked in. He was a rather tall, mahogany colored squirrel and he had a very distinct British accent. "What's all this, then?" Mr. Burns bellowed as he entered, confused by what Richard was doing to Alex. "Mr. Coats, I advise you to return to your seat at once and leave Mr. Stevens alone." Richard and Alex finally met eyes at the sound of their teacher's voice. Richard released the wolf's head and began to turn around to go back to his seat, but he and Alex were locked in a stare. "Uh... yeah, Mr. Burns. I was.... Just..." Richard couldn't finish his sentence. Alex's eyes were too powerful, so Richard shook his head as if to get rid of a bad thought and sat back down in his seat.
Government went by rather quickly for Alex, mainly because he and Richard didn't say anything to each other the entire time. It was a strange feeling, fancying his best friend. Alex didn't want to lose the guy if he didn't approve, but at the same time, he didn't want to withhold his feelings for the large fox either. Since Alex was a senior, he only had two classes a day and Government was his last one for the day. He headed out to the parking lot, got in his car, and drove home before the school lunch rush to get off campus. When Alex arrived at his home, he was pleased to find that his Dad was home and his sister, Marlene was back and visiting from college. Alex loved spending time with his sister because she seemed to bring out the best in him and there was never a dull moment with her, unless she was upset, but Alex always knew how to cheer her up.
Alex walked in through the garage, where his dad was working on his 1985 Z28 Camaro, instead of using the front door. "Hey dad, what's shakin'?" Alex said as he stepped over his father. His dad slid from under the car and greeted him with a friendly head nod. "You're sister's been looking for ya," the older wolf said with a slight chuckle. "You'd think she hadn't seen ya in 15 years." Both of them shared a laugh and Alex continued his journey toward the door. "There's stuff to make sandwiches in the fridge, if ya want." His dad said though gritted teeth, due to holding a wrench in his mouth. "I gotta get Lucy ready for the track tomorrow." Alex knew his dad was a street racer but had never seen him drive on a track. "Alright, dad. I'll leave you to your work." Alex sighed as he entered the house. He didn't enjoy making sandwiches, just eating them. His main focus was to see his sister who he hadn't seen in a while, though. So, without even stopping in the kitchen, Alex head straight upstairs and went to his sister's old bedroom. When he opened the door, Alex was surprised to see Marlene fast asleep with the TV remote in her hand. 'Oh well,' Alex thought. 'I'll see her when she wakes up.'
Alex stripped down to his boxers and flipped on the TV so he could relax. As soon as he turned it to the cartoon channel, his phone began to ring; it was Richard. "Damn it!" Alex said as he picked up the phone and tried to decide whether or not he should answer it. He couldn't let his best friend go to voicemail, so he answered it.
"Hello?" Alex said.
"Hey" Richard sounded as if he were nervous about something. "You want to come over?"
Alex put his paw over the mic and sighed, "Sure. When?" he said.
"Well, practice is over at 4. So I guess... 4:30?" Richard seemed unsure of himself.
"Great. I'll see you then." Alex retorted. "Later, man."
"Yeah, later." Richard hung up and Alex let out a deep sigh.
'Maybe I should tell him today' he thought. 'I have no reason not too and I don't think he'd be too freaked out by it.' Alex got up to check his watch and saw that it was already 3:08. He occupied the next hour by going to the kitchen and trying to make a sandwich. He made a mess and laughed at himself for being so bad at things in the kitchen. He decided to take the sandwich with him to Richard's house and grabbed his keys. He walked out into the garage just as his dad closed the hood of the Camaro. "Hey dad, I'm going over to Richard's for a while." Alex's dad smiled at him and shook his head. "You fancy the guy dontcha?" the older wolf said. Alex was frozen and didn't know what to do or say. "It's alright, son. You have a right to. You've been hangin' out with him since before ya even hit puberty." He walked over and hugged his son. "I just want ya to know, I love ya no matter what." Alex returned the hug, relieved that his dad didn't flip out. His dad pulled away first and the smile was gone from his face; he was more serious and stern now. "I don't want you going and getting your heart broken though. If ya decide to tell 'im, make sure he's really calm first." The older wolf looked at Alex and turned around to go back in the house. "Y'all have fun, now" he said as he closed the door.
Alex got in his car and drove over to Richard's house. It was only a 15 minute drive so Alex actually got there at exactly 4:30. He rang the doorbell and waited for the fox to open it. Richard opened the door and kind of looked away from Alex. "Hey, man." He said. "Come on in."
The air around them was thick with awkwardness and nerves. Neither of them really looked at each other but Richard seemed to know that Alex wanted to tell him something. "What's wrong?" he asked the wolf. "I, uh..." Alex began. "I have to tell you something, Richard." The fox smiled and laughed. "Don't tell me. You're gay, right?" Richard let out a chuckle and Alex just stared at him and blushed a bit. "Well, yeah. But that's not what I wanted to tell you." Alex looked at the floor and rubbed his right forearm with his left paw. "Well, then what is it?" Richard was more serious now. Alex started shaking and fidgeting. "I... I kind of...." He sighed at his inability to speak. "You kind of...?" Richard seemed to be getting impatient. "I love you Richard." Alex put his paw over his mouth in disbelief. Richard raised an eyebrow and contorted his face to where he looked confused and angry at the same time.
"Are you serious? Are you serious?!" Richard yelled. Alex didn't know what to do. He felt like he shouldn't have told him, but it was too late now. "Yeah..." Alex mustered through the tears stinging at his eyes. Richard got up and quickly walked over to the door and opened it. "Get out." He said. There was no hint of joking or even friendliness in his voice now. Alex looked at him fearfully and didn't move. "I said get the fuck out, you fucking faggot!!" the fox was obviously not playing games so Alex scrambled to get up and got out of the door as quickly as possible. Richard slammed the door and almost caught Alex's tail in it.
Alex got in his car and drove back home. He cried most of the way there and couldn't even get the strength to get out of the car. He had no control over his legs. Just like that, his world had crumbled to pieces and he had nowhere to go. Richard was the only other person Alex trusted aside from his dad and his sister and now that's gone. He could tell Richard anything and vice versa. They always had so much fun together and were never separated. Until now. Alex wiped his eyes, sighed and stepped out of the car. "Now what..." he said as he walked back into the house. It was going to be a long week...