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Being a writer is my dream job but it has full-time hours and doesn't pay the bills. I want to keep writing these stories for everyone to enjoy and your support on Ko-Fi helps make that happen. I also appreciate non-financial support like faving, voting, and following me here or on Twitter or BlueSky. Thank you so much for your continued support! Please enjoy the episode.

And with that out of the way…

Welcome back, my lovely reader!

Quite an interesting start, wasn't it? Leo never talked about Flia to Tracey, why was that do you wonder? Trauma, heartache, or maybe… guilt? Perhaps the doe was cruel to him and he wanted it all left behind, or maybe…

Hey, do you remember James? That's Electric Blue's keyboard guy! I know he didn't get much time in the last tale but remember his name, it'll be important later!

Let's jump right in!

—*—

Episode 2:

Hate that I love you

“And I hate how much I love you, boy. But I just can't let you go. And I hate that I love you so."

He woke clinging to her, his cheek against her breasts, the doe's fingers still tangled into his hair with one hand, her other resting on his arm that was around her. The whole thing was surreal, the low rumble of the bus engine driving along, very faint R&B music playing from the speakers on the bolted-down nightstand. She must have turned it on before she passed out with him.

That was it then, his first time, with an older experienced girl, an idol at that. Her scent was all over him, in his nose constantly, and his was all over her as well. Leo shuddered and gave a contented sigh, pushing a little closer to her breasts, wanting to smell her more deeply, and feel her warmth a little closer.

“Relishing it, popstar?" Her words came to him in a soft whisper as he felt her hand rub one of his ears. He blushed and bit his lower lip, simply nodding against her breasts, tightening his hug a little as she giggled.

They stayed like that for a few minutes before she huffed out, “Say… I want to ask you something, Leo."

“What is it, Flia?" He spoke against her breasts, his breath hot against the bar in her peak near his lips. She squirmed a little but kept her focus.

“I see that look in your eyes when you sing. It's like you're just pushing everything away. You have a single goal, and I've only ever seen that with people like me, people with… issues."

Leo shuddered and nodded in response to her words. “Yeah… something like that."

“I mean, you fucked my brains out, and you're here in my arms laying on my tits, I can feel it weighs on you, popstar… you wanna vent a little? I'm obligated to listen," she hummed gently into his ear.

His ears flipped at that as he nodded again. “Is that… okay, Flia? I want to share more about myself with you, I like you after all…"

She smiled and stroked his hair gently. “I like you too, popstar… don't think it's a two-way street though, I'm not offering to unpack things, just watching out for my new protege as it were."

Leo smiled at that and nodded. “You really are nice, Flia… uh… when I was sixteen, almost seventeen… it was my Junior year-"

He only cried a little while he explained why he was so focused, explained he wanted to make it and never have to look back at that world, that family that let him down. Flia just smiled and held him the whole while. She didn't offer advice, she didn't need to, she just wanted him to open up, she knew it'd help him ease that valve so he didn't blow up later as he moved through his career.

After he was done and she had kissed his tears away, she whispered gently into his ear, “We should get moving soon, won't be long before we stop, Leo…"

“S-Sure… but… a little longer?" He whispered out, pushing to nuzzle her breasts, taking a deep scent of her into his nose.

“Ha… alright, Leo… sneak into the shower with me at the truck stop, we'll wash up together, okay?" She hummed down into his ear, grinning as she watched it flip up seeing that fluff of his tail under the sheets start to flick about like a dog tail wagging.

“Okay!" The ram called out happily and she grunted at how tightly he hugged her, giving him a sad smile while he wasn't looking at her face, shaking her head gently.

Once they got to the truck stop, she pulled him right into the shower and they ended up having sex again, before getting cleaned up in earnest. After that, she settled down at a booth with him, a sock hat on to keep her hair tucked up under it, a single platinum blonde bang hanging out of the front of it.

“No gossiping or bragging about this, Leo… you peep a word of it, I'll never spread my legs again for you, I'll fire you, and swear you're lying. You understand?" The doe glared daggers at him with her hard blue eyes while stabbing at some of her oatmeal with a spoon.

“O-Of course, Flia! I'm not a braggart and, uh… it was our personal time, it was special between us, that's no one else's business!" He gave her a resolute nod as he met her fierce gaze with determination.

He watched her eyes shift to the side as she prodded at her oatmeal. “Special, huh?"

“Sorry, did I say something weird?" He frowned at her shift.

The doe simply shook her head and took a few bites of her oats. She then pulled her coffee to her before withdrawing a small flask and proceeding to pour a few ounces of some sort of alcohol into the muh before stirring it. She sipped it and gave a relieved sigh from the dual burn of it going down.

They settled into silence as she sipped her spiked cup of joe and nibbled on oats, then finally she cleared her throat and met his eyes as he jerked them up to her timidly. “Leo… you're a treasure, and for now… you're my treasure, for now…"

He gave her a slow nod as he processed the 'for now' part. Flia moved a hand to his cheek, stroking a thumb along it, just the tip of one of her long nails grazing his soft skin. “You've got a lot going for you, and you won't believe me now, but just understand… I will drag you down eventually, I do everyone I'm with."

“Flia, that's not true!" He grabbed her hand his, eyes looking love-struck again as he huffed out, “I'll be with you, I'll lo-"

“Don't you dare finish those words!" She snarled out, gripping his jaw like she did that first time, forcing his mouth shut. Leo bit his tongue with a whimper and blinked wide-eyed at her. Flia hissed out and eased her grip before pulling her hand away to sip on her coffee. No, she didn't sip it, she was drinking it fast, taking it down in gulps, then she snarled and simply pushed the mug to the floor, a loud shattering of ceramic filling the air before she pulled the flask out and took a few gulps straight from it.

“Sorry, butterfingers, I'll pay for it, just add it to the bill, love." She hissed out to the waitress who came over to check on things and start cleaning up the broken mug.

Leo bit his lower lip hard, still feeling the pain of her nails digging into his cheek but gave her the space she needed. Flia finally composed herself after several minutes and leveled him with a hard glare. “You're high right now, I get it. I was the same fucking way with my first, but know the difference between your dick and your heart, Leo."

“W-What do you mean, Flia?" He frowned as he tried to process what she was getting at.

She shook her head and pulled her cellphone out, quirking a brow at the time. “We need to wrap this up, we've got a schedule to keep. Choke that down and I'll see you… on my bus, understand?"

He swallowed down the lump in his throat, nodding at her orders as he tried to force the rest of his breakfast down. The nerves and twisting in his stomach only let him eat about half of it before the bus started blowing the horn to get the stragglers moving.

—*—

Flia pushed the play button on her phone as the intro started again. “Okay… focus, stop thinking about my tits and pussy, you can have that later."

“R-right!" Leo nodded and closed his eyes, trying to sync up with the music and her. She began with the introduction, soft and sweet, her voice sounding angelic, then he started his part and on the very first note croaked it out like he had a frog in his throat.

She sighed and hit the stop button on her phone and leaned back, rubbing her forehead with her hand. “Popstar… what the fuck are you doing to me, here?"

“I'm sorry, I'm just nervous okay?!" He spat out defensively and clenched his teeth, looking away.

“How can you be fucking nervous? I let you fuck me like twice already, I'm gonna fuck you again later too! Why are you so fucking nervous, Leo?!" She hissed out, glaring at him through her fingers over her face.

“I just… I was thinking about you, okay?!" He spat out and glared at her.

“What about me, Leo? I'm fine, we're fine, what's there to fucking think about?" Flia shifted to put her hands in her lap.

“Uh… Y-You're drinking really hard, and that talk about me not finishing what I was saying!"

He saw her eye twitch, he'd hit a nerve and he knew it instantly. Her eyes looked furious but then they drifted over his worried face and closed. She held them closed for a long series of moments before opening them back up, the look softer but still annoyed. “Leo… my drinking is my own fucking business, it's not-"

“I'm worried about you, okay?!"

“You're not my fucking husband or some shit, don't get in my fucking business!" She snarled out.

“I am your friend though! I can still be fucking worried!" He fired back, showing his own teeth in a snarl.

She flinched at that, darting her eyes away. She pulled the flask out of her pocket and glared at it, then at him, showing him a scowl before throwing the container across the bus. “Why do you fucking care, popstar?"

“Leo." He snarled

Her eyes narrowed as she glared daggers at him. “Why, do you fucking care, Leo?"

“Because I fucking like you, and you're my friend! I respect you, I look up to you, I want to be like you!" He spat the words out clenching his fists.

Flia flinched again at that and squeezed her hands into fists, feeling her nails digging into her palms as she sighed. “Leo… I like you too, but I'm not someone you should try to emulate, okay? This life has fucked me up, I used to be such a chill girl, but now I've no friends, no family, just the shows and whatever I can get my hands on to take the edge off."

“Flia… you've got me now, I'm-"

“No, Leo. I'm a selfish cunt, but I'm not dragging you down. I'll get you on a good path, and toughen you up a bit, but I don't have you!" She shouted at him, her eyes looking wet now.

Leo gritted his teeth and jerked his gaze from hers, resting his elbows on his knees, snarling at the floor as he shook his head. “Flia… can you try to lay off the booze and drugs a little, for me?"

She frowned and folded her arms, looking at him sitting there, not backing down but giving her the space to think clearly. Flia took a calming sigh and looked over at the silver flask across the bus. “I… can try to calm down on it around you, Leo."

“I mean in general, be a cunt, be a diva that steps on everyone if you want, but please… that shit'll just kill you, it'll also just speed up how quickly you have to call it quits… if nothing else, do it for your fans."

“For my fans huh?" Flia pursed her lips as she looked away.

“Yeah… all the bullshit, we do it for them, that's what you said a good performer is all about, yeah? You can't put on a good show if you trash your body, so… for them. Not for me, but for them, just one more thing to tack on the list for their needy asses, right?"

She chuckled at that and scooted a little closer, pushing her hand over his own, squeezing it. “You… you're dangerous… You're going to break so many hearts, popstar…" Looking away she gave a sad smile, realizing hers would be the first on that list of his.

—*—

“C'mon, popstar! Keep, the, beat and, pitch, now!" Flia wagged her finger, her hips swaying as she stood before him, face to face, speaking in a melodic hum to the opening beats.

Leo gave her a nod, staring into her blue eyes that sparkled in the light of the stage, her words heard by the thousands before them. The ram was dressed in snug tight shiny black pants, shamelessly showing off his backside muscles. The jacket he wore was a two-toned black and blue one that attached to the pants. His hair now had a shock of blue running through it and he had a blue bolt across his face she put on him herself. The jacket was drawn open to his navel, showing the sculpted abs and toned muscles of his chest.

“Flia Price and Electric Blue's debut performance, you better fucking scream for my ram, loves!" The doe thrust her finger out towards the audience as the whole building shuttered. Leo swallowed hard, seeing the doe give him a confident grin, then looked to the side of the stage, seeing Max puff his chest out and give him a fist pump.

The song started, she was already singing her portion as he started nodding, closing his eyes, and tuning everything out, all the fans, all the nerves. He pushed it all down, all that mattered was this moment, her and Max, the two that made him, the two that molded him for this moment. His time came, this was it, he knew it.

He sang the notes out in perfect pitch and harmony, his eyes opening wide looking wet in the lights, staring into her own. Flia widened her eyes which also grew wet, looking lovestruck at what she had created, knowing there was no going back now. The audience knew it too, they watched a young ram die on stage that night and an idol be born in his place.

Leo sang with her and halfway through the duet she pushed into his arms, his hands moving to her hips. They locked into a slow dance while singing, their faces close enough to appear intimate but far enough to avoid feedback on the mics. She pushed into his chest, looking in love with him, her tail flicking in time to his own sang words, growing still on her own.

They finished the song with him dropping to a knee in a dramatic finish as he pushed his head to her chest, Flia cradling it as she looked up at the bright lights. She had tears in her eyes, he was crying too. It looked staged, but it wasn't, it was pure raw emotion for both of them. The concert hall was still and quiet as the last chord hummed out to silence, and then the whole place erupted in a scream of passionate adoration for them.

She heard his name in the crowd, heard it drowning out her own as she held him. She knew at that moment she had reached the height. Flia Price would never move higher than this moment, it was all downhill for her now, but his climb was just starting. Leo looked up at her, oblivious to it all, he only saw her eyes, probably not even processing how many of the cries were for him.

—*—

Flia shuddered as she moved into her dressing room, pushing her hands to the makeup table. Her heart was still pounding in her chest as she tried to calm everything. He was hitting notes in her she swore no boy ever would again. Her hand pushed to her chest, shivering as she felt the throb of her pulse through her fingertips. Her ears perked and she shifted her gaze to the entrance as she heard a knock, the door still open, the ram standing there.

Her blue eyes widened at the sight of him, he looked different, confident, like she did. He was there and no one could deny it, he was an idol. She cleared her throat to compose herself. “Come on in, popstar… shut the door… lock it too…"

Leo frowned but did as she instructed, then walked over to her. They stared upon one another for a long hard moment, neither seeming to find the words, then she averted her eyes and he finally spoke, “That was… amazing with you."

“Leo… Blue… You're there, you know that, yeah?" She blinked up at him with a small grin.

He frowned and shook his head. “Because of you… let's tour together, Flia. You and me! We can-"

“Stop! Please…" She pushed a hand to his lips as he gave her a shocked look. The doe clenched her teeth and drooped her ears. “Look, Leo… I'm not stupid, the writing is on the wall. I'll be twenty-two next month. I can't keep pulling off the bubbly sexy teenager look. I can't keep showing more skin and fur to get attention either, you know what I'm saying?"

“I… I don't really understand what that has to do with us, Flia." He blinked down into her eyes, the doe just shaking her head again as she pushed closer, leaning up to kiss his lips.

They lingered there for a moment before she pushed her forehead to his chest. “Leo, I'm due to renegotiate my contract at the end of this tour. Come with me along with your manager, we'll get you squared away. The record company will sign you no questions asked once they see the footage from these shows."

“Flia… you'd vouch for me like that?" He pushed his hand down through her blonde and pink hair, the locks soaked in sweat.

“Of course, I will dumbass… what are friends for? I told you I'd get you there, I will." She gave him a weak grin as her palm ran over his jaw.

“But… what about you, Flia?" The ram kept stroking her wet hair as she shook her head and sighed.

“Will you knock that off? You have to worry about your own tail in this business, Leo! You let me worry about my contract. If I get another one."

“If? Wait- Flia do you think they won't sign you again? You're still crazy popular, you're still selling out every place we go!" Leo grabbed her hands and she offered him a sad smile.

“Who knows, popstar… trends change and the higher-ups might figure I'm too old to make it in this world anymore. The older you get, the more detached from teenagers you become, the ones that follow you grow up, they start jobs, have kits, and don't have time for concerts. You know how it is, yeah?"

Leo frowned at that but Flia just continued, “Anyway… Leo… I'm not going to tour with you. I can't… you're on your way, and like it or not, I'll drag you down."

“You won't!" He snarled but then huffed as Flia grabbed his jaw, snarling up at him.

“So you know all about the industry after fucking me for a few months and being an idol for one night, Leo?!" She spat out, her blue eyes looking sharp once more. Leo hissed out and jerked his face from her nails, but then looked back at her as her palm pushed to his cheek. “You're gonna be off the charts, Blue… I won't take that from you. Stop thinking about it, let's just enjoy the ride until it's over, okay… Leo?"

He gave a nod and clenched his teeth. They still had a month left, maybe he could talk some sense into her, maybe he could- His thoughts scattered as she pulled him down and pushed her mouth right to his own, her tongue already meeting his.

His mind went blank as he just pulled her against him, feeling her smaller sweaty body pressing closer, their tongues rolling together gently. “Gods…" Flia broke the kiss and grabbed his open jacket, jerking him down closer, moving in to lap her tongue along his throat, tasting his musk and sweat, her tail flicking erratically as she huffed out. “You taste and smell so fucking good!"

“So do you, Flia… fuck…" Leo snarled and shifted his hands along her hips, peeling the tights off her, bringing the doe's soaked panties down with them, her little silver piercing in her pearl shining in the lights of the makeup counter.

Flia stepped out of her rolled-up tights and panties, keeping her heels on before hopping right up on the makeup counter. “You like it when I do this… right, popstar?" She gave him an eager grin, moving a hand down between her legs, spreading herself to show that pink entrance past her petals.

“Leo." The ram snorted as he moved between her legs, tugging those shiny black pants open.

Flia smirked and cleared her throat, even moving her hand away before starting again. She moved to spread herself once more, tilting her chin up as she spoke out playfully, “You like it when I do this, right… Leo?"

He shuddered and gave her a nod, parting those pants as she watched that bulge he'd been sporting finally being freed, his length fully ready for her, precum rolling from the tip. Flia licked her lips as he moved in and pressed himself right to her entrance.

“Gods yes… c'mere, Leo… I wanted to push you down and mount you right there on the stage…" She hissed the words as he pushed forward, her small tongue showing as he pushed nice and deep, every inch filling her until he settled against her core.

“Fuck… Flia…" He moaned into her ear softly as her legs wrapped around him, her crystal heels crossing as she felt him start to pump inside her eagerly.

“That's it… ngh… just like that, Leo…" She whispered against his lips, kissing him from time to time as he pumped inside her, one of her hands fondling his drooped ear, another gently holding to his shoulder.

“Flia… gods you're so tight and hot tonight…" He huffed as he stared into her blue eyes, the doe grinning with each impact to her core. He wasn't frantic, he was savoring her like he had been doing the last several times.

“I am… it was so hot… so romantic… ngh… that's it, Leo… right there, oh yeah… you've gotten so good at this… huff huff…" She groaned out, hugging closer to him, gripping some of his hair in a fist as he felt her crest, her honey dripping off his sacs to the floor beneath them.

“Ha… you saying I was bad before?" He quipped back playfully into her ear.

Flia giggled and kissed along his jaw, hugging closer as she panted out. “Stupid… you know that's not what I… mean… you were always good… just better n-now… ngh!" She clenched her teeth, sharp nails digging into his shoulder and scalp again.

“I love how much you… cum for me, Flia… love making you feel good… I love-" Her hand pushed to his lips, panting into his ears as her own hips ground back now, her legs locking tighter as he felt her walls clenching once more.

His cheeks burned as she halted his confession but he nodded and drew her tight into his arms, shivering as he tried to drink in the moment, his hips pumping faster now, listening to this deer's soft happy moans and huffs. “Yes… that's it's, that's it my-" She clenched her teeth together, cutting her own words off, hugging tight to him, hiding her tears as he drove deep.

“Flia… gods… I- I'm!" She clung tightly and said nothing, nails digging into his back as she nodded, her eyes burning, just wanting to save this, to keep it as long as she could.

“Gods!" Leo bleated out in a soft moan and she gave a sharp gasp as his heat surged into her, arching her back, tears rolling down her cheeks as he erupted into her.

Flia leaned back, bracing on her hands, teeth clenched, huffing and moaning through them as he kept pushing against her core, sending each thick rope of his love into her. The doe lolled her tongue, shivering as the last of it filled her, the young ram slapping his hands to the counter, panting in relief as he slumped forward. She hugged him tightly, using his jacket to brush her tears away while he recovered, offering a silent apology to him and herself.

—*—

The tour concluded about a month later. He tried to keep talking her into just saying the hell with it and recording an album with him, to go on tour with him. She wouldn't budge, she kept saying he needed to focus on himself going forward. They had a lot of sex in that time, sometimes multiple times a day, as if they both knew what was coming.

Flia kept her word, she got him that meeting, she got his foot in the door. The concert footage and the social media buzz were more than enough proof he was there. They'd be fools not to sign him after all.

He met with her outside the record studios and they went for a walk in the small garden area on the property. She stopped and stared at the manmade brook that cut through the area, her hands on her hips.

“So… my stuff is doing pretty well in Europe… They want me to go there and tour for a year or so, then they'll discuss if they want me to record a new album…" Flia just blurted the words out, the wind making her dyed hair drift along behind her.

“T-They've got me heading to the west coast, want me recording, said they'd… add our song as the title track…" He rubbed his arm with a frown as he looked at her.

“See, you made it, popstar. Flia Price always keeps her word, right?" She offered him a small weak grin, punching his shoulder lightly.

“I- Flia… what happens now? What happens to… us?" He tilted his head with a frown. She swallowed the lump in her throat, seeing the tears already in his eyes.

She sighed and looked away. “Leo… there's no us. We were friends with benefits. I got you sorted like I-"

“Bullshit!" He snarled and clenched his fists, tears showing now as the doe clenched her teeth, brushing a hand over his cheeks to wipe them away.

“Please, Leo… don't make this harder than-"

“No! I… I love you, okay!?" He finally got the words out she was trying to keep him from confessing. Flia turned her back on him, pushing a hand over her own cheek, and shaking her head. 'I love you too, I don't care about the stupid tour, I want to help you keep growing, I want to be with you!' The thoughts whirled in her heart, but, no. She knew it would ruin him, she had to do this, that was how she would show her own love.

“Say something!" He sobbed the words, tears rolling down his cheeks, his teeth clenched as well as his fists.

Flia turned to look up at him, her eyes wet, tears on her own cheeks as they hardened. “Leo… how many times did I say I loved you?" 'I love you so much.'

“You… never did… but you-"

She cut him off with a snarl, “Did I ever call you boyfriend? Did I ever let you call me girlfriend?!" 'I wish I could have, I wish I could have been your girlfriend.'

“No… you, didn't…" He sniffled and wiped his face. He looked like a little boy right now, like a frightened fawn she just wanted to hug and tell him it'd be alright.

Flia shuddered as she took a deep breath. “Leo… I kept my word, I never promised you anything else… I never led you on, I never promised you, my love. I've tried to do right by you at every turn…" 'I'm so sorry, I love you so much…'

“So that's it? Was I just a fuck buddy? A conquest? Punch my card and walk away all smug?" He gave her an angry snarl, his own eyes sharpening.

Flia felt her heart sink and pushed a hand to her chest. “Leo!… I told you I like you, I… you were never any of that. You were my friend and I do lo-"

“You what?! Did you just set me up to butter up the fucking company?! Here's a new star, don't cancel me?!" He sneered, his eyes looking full of anger, but then they widened and he instantly regretted the words.

“Leonard, you… you son of a bitch!" Flia cried the words out, tears rolling down her cheeks as she stepped back, sobbing at his accusations. “I just… I was just trying to do some fucking good, give you a fucking chance at the life you wanted!"

He reached for her, panic filling his heart. “Flia, wait- I'm sorry I-"

“Fuck you!" She screamed as she slapped his hand away from her. “I was doing what was best for you, everything I was doing was for you! All for fucking you! I knew my career was over soon! I- I-" She screamed out and stepped away further.

“Flia, I'm sorry, wait, please!" Leo called out to her as she snarled, that jaded look filling her eyes he'd not seen since he met her.

“No! I fucking hate you, Leonard! I love you, but I'll never speak to you again, you heartless son of a bitch! Enjoy your fucking career!" The doe turned and stormed off, tears rolling down her face. Leo just stood there, stunned, watching her stomp off, hearing her sobbing slowly fade.

Leo just fell to the ground sitting there, tears refusing to stop falling, looking down at his hands, trying to process everything. His teeth gritted as he just hugged himself and started sobbing. He'd made it, he got his dreams, he was going to be a star, and all it cost him was the heart of the doe he loved.

—*—

Max helped support Leo through the breakup and six months later his first self-titled album Electric Blue was released. It was met with moderate acclaim but he just didn't have the heart for it. He actually wanted to change his stage persona given how attached to Flia it was, but the studio had him under contract, he had to be Electric Blue.

“You gonna pitch a bitch fit if I get a star point crooked this time, cry baby? The fan in nose bleed seat number thirty-six might notice it." The llama drolled out as she worked on his makeup.

“Just shut up and do your job, Trixie," Leo sneered through clenched teeth, trying to not move his cheeks as she worked.

“Fuck me, I can't wait until this contract is fucking done, ever since that piece of ass you were courting ditched you a few weeks ago… you were already an asshole but now you're just full-tilt mother fucker mode…" Trixie snarled back without missing a beat.

Leo sat back, glaring at her as she offered him a bored look and blew a bubble, popping it with a snap as she chewed, knowing it pissed him off. She huffed out, blowing a pink curl out of her face, “Say it, boss, tell me I'm fired, Max can put your fucking stars on for you."

“Get out," Leo snarled and spun his chair around to stare at himself in the mirror.

“That's what I thought. Hey, who was the sucker that did your fucking bolt before I came along anyway? Can only imagine how bad you treated them," The llama cat called the words out, not waiting for an answer as he heard the door slam to his dressing room.

Leo sat there in his makeup chair, hearing the light thrum of the opening band through the walls. He looked at the bolt over his eye, it was perfect in every way, precise and accurate. Flia's were always sloppy and sometimes looked more blocky than anything else, they were the best. He gave himself a pitiful sigh, shaking his head.

He'd finally tried with a girl after over half a year, she didn't seem eager for sex and he was afraid to push into it after Flia. He used their sex as a weapon against her, threw it back in her face, and hadn't gone a day without regretting it. The girl he had been seeing was happy to spend up when it was his dime though. Fancy restaurants, pricy gifts. She said she loved him constantly, pretty much from the start. Loved him until a rich sugar daddy picked her up in one town they were stopping at anyway.

A knock came on the door, pulling him out of his self-pity as Max trotted in with a grin. “Showtime, Leo, baby!" He grinned, then offered him a frown, seeing the look in his eyes. “You okay, Leo? Thinking about Flia again?"

“No one asked you, Max." The ram sighed and stood from the chair, his manager frowning and folding his ears down.

“Fine, Leonard…" Max set him with a hard look and nodded. “The studio reached out to me. Since we're doing even better with True Blue Avenue, they want a third album, we should start looking toward that soon. You wanna brainstorm on the bus and plan some songs?"

Leo winced at the album name, the song it was named after was for her. He wrote the fucking thing to be therapeutic, but it went straight to the top five, now he had to sing it constantly and have those wounds raked open repeatedly. Max saw his eyes and moved to grip his arm hard as he nodded.

“Max… I… I miss her so fucking much…" He shuddered as he blinked down at him, tears rolling across his stage makeup.

“I know… I know Leo, c'mere." The ram took a knee and his oldest friend held him, careful to not muss his makeup anymore. “I'm here, Leonard… I always will be. I love you, man, we'll get you through this..."

The idol nodded and shuddered, thinking back to that day at the gas station, sniffling a little before he sighed out, “Yeah… let's jam and plan on the bus tonight, like old times, man…"

—*—

It was about a month before their second tour was to conclude, they'd been working for the last few months between stops on the bus. They had over a dozen songs composed, Max with his guitar, Leo working on vocals. It wasn't a studio though and their band was just guys assigned to them, not the kind of group you could sit in and have a session with like this. There were limits to what they could do on a bus.

“I don't know, Max… we're good, but we need a stable keyboard guy. I need someone I can trust to mix synth in time with me, someone I can vibe with. I need someone I can keep with us that I can get to know." Leo grumbled the words over a beer at an after-concert party with the crew, of course, he had his knit cap on to keep his profile down, dressed in jeans and a t-shirt.

“Yeah, I get that, Leo baby…" The manager rubbed his head before sipping his own beer. “Once we finish we could take a few weeks to scout the area, maybe hold some audtions?"

“I guess it's all we can do…" Leo clicked his tongue as he turned his attention to the local band. They had only been going for thirty seconds and sounded like shit. “Gods… I hope they aren't paying these guys mu-" His ears lifted as he focused, hearing the keyboardist start.

The ram quirked a brow as he nudged the rat next to him. “Max… listen to that shit…"

Maximilian lifted a scrutinizing ear and then perked both of them, his mouth gaping slightly. “Well, that's… that's pretty good!"

“More than pretty good, little bastards playing on a shit deck like that?" Leo stood and looked over at the small band, four members, a frontman that couldn't carry a tune in a bucket, a bass player that was okay, with a mediocre drummer at best. Then he shifted his attention to the guy on the deck.

The dog had a knit cap on, jet black bangs hanging out of the front of it, more flowing down the back of his neck to about his shoulders. Looked to be a short guy, but most corgis were generally. Might have been twenty if he were twelve, but his hands moved over those keys like a savant.

“Okay, that's enough…" Leo stood with a snarl as he moved toward the stage.

“L-Leo, baby! What are you doing?!" Max squeaked out as he followed after him.

The ram strutted up to the stage and put his hands on his hips, staring at the band, all of them looking awkward at how close he was. He waited until their first song finished before he yelled out. “Yo! How much are they paying you guys?"

There were only maybe fifty people in the club counting the crew so it didn't take much to stop the performance as the lead singer stammered down at the ram. “Dude what the fuck, we're in a set here!"

“Answer the question, I might make it worth your while kid." Leo flourished a hand to pull his cap off, letting the blue and white hair come into view.

The corgi barked out at that display himself, "Holy shit, that's EB!"

“Who?" The frontman snarled, then his eyes widened as Leo gave him an annoyed look. "Wait, Electric Blue? The guy that just had a show in town a few hours ago?"

“I'll give each of you five hundred bucks if you let me up there to sing one song and you take a break, big guy." The ram cocked a brow as he shifted his gaze to each of them.

“Deal!" The drummer snapped out happily.

“Dude, you can't just make that decision for us!" The lead singer growled.

“Yeah he can, I need some major upgrades to my gear, shit we all do, go sit down, Josh!" The bass player hissed out as he moved over and hip-checked the singer who grumbled but stepped down.

Leo snorted as he walked over and looked down at the cheap mic with a scowl. “Max!"

The rat piped up and lifted his ears. “Yes, EB?!"

“Cut me four checks, one thousand each, these guys need all the help they can get judging by their gear." He sighed and turned to the corgi. “What's your name, man?"

The dog blinked up at him in awe, shuddering a little as the idol loomed over him. “Uh… uh…"

Leo offered him a smirk. “C'mon man, I put my pants on one leg at a time and sit down to shit just like you do, name."

“Oh uh… James." He gave a nod as he saw the ram looking over his deck.

“She's a mess, but I can see the love you've put in her. Know any Dream Theater?"

James flashed him a cocky grin, his brown eyes sharpening in challenge. “Maybe."

“I'll go easy on you. Pull me Under." Leo spun on a heel and moved to the mic.

The drummer called out, “Hang back, we don't have enough instruments for-"

“Do your best, don't care, go!" Leo snarled the words as he snapped his fingers.

The song sounded half-baked given their lack of skill or numbers but it didn't matter, he got what he wanted out of it. The crowd ate it up all the same, Leo's vocals easily carrying the bulk of the weight with James's synth backing him up. It felt good, it felt right, he'd not felt so in tune with someone since Flia.

“Thanks for being a good sport, man." Leo clapped the frontman on the shoulder and then nodded. “You don't have the pitch for what you're going for, study some Frampton, I think that's the vocals you're looking for, just some advice from someone at the top." The idol gave him a wink and sauntered back over to Max.

Max frowned and tilted his head, “Leo, baby, uh… that was great but…"

“Check our touring budget, I might have us a new band member." The ram hummed as he tucked his locks back into his knit cap.

Leo and Max waited for the set to finish before flagging down James. The corgi took a seat with them and they both noted the nerves in his posture and eyes. Leo grinned and got right to the point as he spoke, “Your synth, I want it."

“Uh… wait, you mean you want my deck?" James stammered out, his tan cheeks growing darker.

“No, dumbass!" Leo snarled, “I'm offering you a spot in my band, dip-shit!"

The corgi gave a startled bark and looked around nervously before down to the beer he'd ordered. “Uh… you're kidding right?"

“No, James. Blue and I both agree you're highly talented and we've been looking for someone for the long term. We can talk salary later if you're interested." Max offered a more diplomatic foil to Leo's swearing and snarling.

“Yeah, you very tight with those other guys?" Leo cocked a brow.

James shook his head. “No, this was actually our first gig, I'd only signed on with them about a month ago. I've not been very impressed but didn't have any better options."

“Well, you do now. We've got a month left on this tour then I'm back in the studio to record another LP. You stick with me and cut that shit as well on a real stage as you did here in this dive. You'll be right there with me, full member, name on the record and everything."

The corgi's ears perked up through his knit hat, his brown tail blurring behind him as he nodded several times. “Holy shit… Fuck yes, you got me, EB, where do I sign?!"

—*—

She hadn't been back to the company in over a year as she pushed into the office of the label's vice president. The goat before her had salt and pepper hair that was cut short and wore a fancy high-dollar suit to match the opulent desk. The wall had several platinum records on it from various greats.

“Flia, have a seat, how was Europe?" The goat offered her a smile, but she could see the calculated look in his eyes.

“It was something, I did my little fucking song and dance. Kept the venues stuffed, surprisingly. Didn't bother seeing the sights, didn't even fuck anyone this tour," She sighed with a shrug as she rested her hands in her lap. She was in blue jeans and a snug t-shirt with a jacket on given it was winter.

“Yes, well uhm… you certainly have a way of keeping the crowds enchanted even at your… age?" He formed the question in an apologetic tone, giving her a sympathetic smile.

“It's okay Jacob, I'm well aware I'm on borrowed time here, is that a segue into saying we're done?" She set him with a serious look, her eyes hardened as if she were already expecting it.

The goat clicked his tongue as he withdrew an envelope from the desk, tapping it a few times as he turned it over in his hand. “Are you familiar with the song… True Blue Avenue?" His eyes cut to her, seeing the doe wince.

“I've heard it a few times, yeah. EB's work, it made you guys a pretty penny, roosted at number one here in the states for about eight weeks, four weeks across the pond." Her blue eyes averted to the floor.

“He wrote it over you, Flia." Jacob quipped out dryly before tossing the envelope to her.

“No shit, Sherlock," She snarled and snatched the envelope up, glaring at it as if it were severance pay. “The fuck is-" Her eyes widened as she turned it over, only her first name on it, hand-written in a script she instantly recognized.

—*—

“This is so dumb, Flia and my hand is killing me!" Leo gave her an happy laugh, laying on his belly on the floor of the bus. She was sitting, straddling his back in just panties and one of his t-shirts.

“Tough shit, popstar! I told you I'd train you up, gotta work on that autograph! Do it again!" She leaned down, pushing her chest into his back, cooing into his ear as she thrust a finger down onto the drawing pad, a mass of at least a hundred paper wads all around them.

Leo licked his lips and snarled as he tried to scribble 'Electric Blue' out again, but he only got to the T before she huffed out in his ear. “Not good enough, try again!" She giggled as she ripped the page out, wadded it up, and bounced it off his head with a grin.

“Well, maybe I could do it if you weren't on my damn back, Flia!" He laughed and tried to roll her over but she just lifted up, the ram rolling onto his own back before the doe gingerly plopped back down on his stomach, grinning down at him.

He stared up into her eyes, his green ones looking comfortable and happy. She bit her lower lip, staring into those lovely emerald pools before leaning down, bumping her lips to his own in a quick kiss. “Again!" She barked out against his lips before giggling and hopping up.

“Hey!" Leo gave his own fussy bleat as he climbed up after her. She grinned as he grabbed her hips, pulling her close to him.

“Okay okay… you can take a little break, popstar…" She cooed out as she threw her arms around his neck, pushing to his lips again, this kiss more purposeful, their tongues rolling as he shuddered and returned it.

—*—

She felt her breath catch in her throat, her vision growing blurry before she blinked her eyes a few times and scowled at the goat. “The fuck is this?"

Jacob gave a shrug. “Don't know, don't care. Leonard Montone ask me to give it to you when you got back into town. Toss it in the wastebasket on the way out for all I care. Shit, make up and break his heart again, he might go platinum."

“Fuck you, Jake. Stay out of my fucking business between me and him," She hissed out with a glare, the goat just holding his hands up placatively.

"Right… so what about me?" She tucked the envelope into her jacket and set the goat with another hard look.

“You're twenty-three now, Flia… been at this since you were fifteen… ready for a break?" He spoke out conversationally.

She swallowed the lump in her throat and felt her mouth go dry as she whispered, “Do… I have a choice?"

“Yes…" He pushed a contract forward and she quickly shifted to look upon it, biting her lower lip.

“You're… you want me to record a new LP? Wait- Jacob are you high?" She snarled out, then glanced at the pay rate, nodding as she saw it was the same offer she was currently making, which was a pleasant surprise, she expected them to shave at least twenty percent off if they even kept her for just touring.

“The President thinks you've still got the stuff, the analytics be damned, I happen to agree with him. You're not out of the game yet, Flia. Well, not unless you want to be." The ram slapped the pen down in front of her.

Her hand hesitated at the pen before she snatched it up and quickly signed her name on the line. “Fuck no, I love my fans… they're all I have left, I'll ride this train until you kick me the fuck off it!"

“Atta girl!" Jacob showed his teeth as he moved to make his own signature, then turned to the liquor cabinet. “Drink to celebrate, Flia?"

She paused in hesitation before shaking her head. “Thanks, Jacob, I'll take a rain check though, been trying to cut down. Need to go check on some things." She whispered as she brushed a hand on her jacket.

He gave her a knowing nod. “EB's wrapping up a new LP of his own you know. Think he's calling it Neon Sunset, or something like that."

She perked her ears and gave a small nod. “That… sounds like his style. Be seeing you, Jake."

“Don't be a stranger!" The goat threw a hand up as she slipped out of the office.

Flia quietly left the offices, looking over at the attached garden. She swallowed a lump in her throat and moved over to there, standing in the spot she had over a year ago. Her hands were shaking as she pulled the envelope from her jacket but not from the cold.

“Leonard… you fucking moron… what have you done now?" She pulled it open, breaking the wax seal on it before unfolding the letter within.

“Flia,

I know you hate me now, and I hate myself every day for what I put you through that day. We both are songwriters, so I know you'd smell bullshit a mile away if I made some impassioned spiel here, so I'll say it as plainly as I can.

I love you, and I'm so sorry. I never meant what I said, I was just angry and afraid of losing you. But I lost you anyway and I regret the pain I caused you every day of my life. I won't ask for your forgiveness over my words, just know I will always love you, and I wish you nothing but the best. Thank you for loving me and making my dreams a reality.

Popstar."

She took a seat on the nearby bench and just clutched the letter to her chest, tears coming to her eyes as her ears drooped. “Leo… you selfish bastard… You just had to have the last word…" She hung her head, sobbing quietly as the snow started to fall.

---

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