Merge - 21 - Mistake

Story by Monion on SoFurry

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#22 of Merge

As Kael might say, "Dude! Shit just got real."

A short but very intense chapter. I may have rushed the editing process a bit this time, so if you notice mistakes feel free to let me know!

Artwork is Jay, done by VintageMutt. https://vintagemutt.sofurry.com/. He's lounging around at home in his 70s-esque basement.


With a playful swat to the cougar's butt, Matt pushed past his boyfriend to get up the stairs to their living room. Jay was still being a little cagey, but the husky was in much better spirits about the two of them after the delicious meal together. It had been nice to go on an actual honest-to-goodness date for once, just the two of them. Matt resolved to make more time for Jay so they could make date nights a regular thing.

When Matt burst through the upstairs door, he saw the entire house of friends, plus Axel, waiting for them in the living room. Laura, Chris, and Axel were waiting on the couch, their muzzles all pursed solemnly, while Kael stopped pacing in front of them long enough to whirl on the couple.

"What is this, the Spanish Inquisition?" the grey-blue husky said, with a grin and a slow wag as Jay sidled up behind him.

"Huh?"

"He means that he wasn't expecting us, Chris. No one expects the Spanish Inquisition." Kael moved forward so that he was inches away from Matt, then reached out a clawed finger and tapped Jay on the chest behind the husky. "Why'd you take it, Jay?"

"Take w-what?"

Matt turned his head and looked at his boyfriend from the corner of his eye. Tail thrashing erratically, the cougar was shivering slightly as his eyes darted between Kael and Matt.

"My binder, dude. The one filled with notes on Ameranth? The one that I had hidden away and only Matt and I knew where it was?"

Matt's hackles raised as he pushed his snout into Kael's personal space. "Hey, maybe Jay didn't do it; maybe it was CSIS who found it on their own?"

Kael backed up slightly, but didn't back off. "You and I always used magic to mask our voices when talking about that binder. You know that, dude."

"I saw Jay coming out of the basement earlier this week," Chris said, still sitting on the couch. When Matt met the moose's brown eyes, Chris looked sad at delivering the news. Even his antlers seemed to sag. "When nobody else was home. He was really nervous, like he was hiding something."

The husky sighed and threw up his paws. "That still doesn't mean--"

"I found his purple earring under the mattress, Matt! Right where the fucking binder was!"

After Kael's proclamation, the room went silent. The husky turned to Jay, watching his boyfriend play with his earrings. A nervous habit, Matt knew, but it also conveniently concealed the missing one. Or so the cougar probably hoped.

"Your earring was missing at dinner. I asked about it, you never really gave me an answer."

"Matt..." Jay shook his head, his eyes wide and ears pinned down.

"Seems like you were probably in Kael's room at some point. Why, Jay?"

"I... it's not..."

"What did you do with the binder?"

Jay kept shaking his head as he backed up into the door, eyes wide. Pressing himself against it as if he could just fall through it, the cougar wouldn't, or couldn't, respond.

A growl erupted from the husky as he stomped forwards, his muzzle pulled back in a snarl as he trapped the smaller fur between his arms. Somewhere in the recesses of his mind he knew he was terrifying his boyfriend, but this was bigger than both of them. "Where did the binder go, Jay? Tell me!"

The cat slumped to the floor and held his legs to his chest. "I'm so sorry Matt! I just... I just wanted to help! You're always so busy, and so stressed out trying to handle all this stuff by yourself!"

"You haven't answered my question. Where is the binder?"

"I... gave it to... to Zachary Knowles."

"What the fuck?" "How could you, Jay?" "I knew it!"

Chaos ensued in the living room. Kael, Laura and Chris were yelling, while Axel immediately dialed a number on his phone and began to talk quietly to the fur on the other side of the line. Staring at each other, the rest of their friends might as well have been behind a sound-proof wall for all Matt and Jay noticed.

"I'm sorry, Matt." Tears clung to the cougar's whiskers and cheek fur. Matt continued to stare down at his boyfriend impassively, clenching his paws and drawing blood from his own paw pads. "Why aren't you saying something Matt? Anything. Please... you're scaring me."

"What do you want me to say, Jay?" The husky's voice was low, and everyone hushed to hear. "You were my boyfriend. We were supposed to be able to trust each other."

"Were?"

"And because I trusted you, an entire other world of furs might be in danger, because I certainly couldn't trust CSIS. I can't know they have benign intentions, not with how they acted, and they'll use that information to their advantage one way or another."

"I was trying to help! You were overloaded with worry and stress! I love you Matt, please!"

Matt pinched the bridge of his muzzle. "We need to think about what you've done and what it means to our relationship, and I'm having a hard time doing that right now. You need to leave, Jay. Give me your key."

"Don't do this, Matt." Jay was weeping and shuddering now, holding himself close.

"Your key!"

The cougar gingerly placed his house key in Matt's paw before looking into his boyfriend's icy blue eyes. Fear and hurt were mirrored in Jay's own gaze, but Matt couldn't find it in him to do more than seethe. Who was Jay to feel hurt when he brought this on himself?

And then Jay was gone, having slunk out the door while Matt was being introspective. The husky could feel the eyes of his friends on his back, and the quiet whispers of Axel's voice on the phone, but all he could do was stare at the now-closed entrance. A few moments or minutes - Matt couldn't be sure - he felt a heavy arm around his shoulders.

"Hey, you okay?" Chris whispered, his muzzle close to Matt's ears.

Before Chris could attempt to comfort Matt further, the husky threw off the moose's arm and stomped down the stairs. "I'll be in my room. I need to be alone for a bit. And don't let Jay back into the house."

* * * * *

It had been a really awkward five minutes after Matt fled to his room. Laura was playing with her tail, and it was Chris' turn to stare at the door dejectedly. Axel had finally gotten off the phone, but the cop's ears and tail were drooping like he had been hit with a bucket of cold water. Kael couldn't come up with anything to say that would even remotely help the situation.

So instead Kael studied the décor. He didn't hang out in the living room that often, preferring his bedroom and computer over the noisier group setting, but he had to admit they had done a pretty good job on it. The couch and loveseat took up the most space, but they were pretty cheap at goodwill. And they had all chipped in some money to get a decent television to watch movies on. Well, except Jay, considering he only sort of lived at the house. Which apparently was just as well, because they didn't have to worry about buying out Jay's share in the furniture if he didn't have one.

And Jay. Kael never thought that the cougar would ever do anything like that. The cat was honest to a fault as far as he could tell. And maybe he was telling the truth when he was telling Matt that he was doing it to help, but the road to Hell is paved with good intentions. Nothing could excuse the cat's betrayal of their trust, at least in Kael's mind. Maybe Matt would think of it differently once he calmed down. The kangaroo had never seen his best friend so angry in his entire life. He was afraid that Jay might've gotten a muzzleful of magic or paw or something.

"Who were you calling?" Laura whispered, still playing with the black fur she had dyed at the end of her tail.

Tension melting with Laura's question, Kael began to breathe normally. He hadn't realized he was trying to hold his breath the entire time.

"CSIS and the force aren't exactly on good terms," Axel explained. "We help the spooks when it doesn't interfere with our jobs or break the law, but we don't really agree with most of their methods. Terrorizin' furs to get information, hackin' accounts, spyin' without warrants. You name it. 'Cept we can't really pin anything on them. Too hard to prove they're breakin' the law."

The policefur stood and stretched, his paws touching the ceiling. After pulling down on his shirt, he continued. "I was warnin' my boss that CSIS may suddenly have a lot more info than they used to about the entire scenario, and that we should be on the lookout for interference. Like if they decide to try and coerce one of our officers, or capture a demon, or somethin'. I also told my partner to keep an eye on Jay."

"You think the dude might try something else?"

Axel shook his head. "Maybe. I don't really trust him not to. He's really upset right now, and he might try something desperate."

"Do you think he might be suicidal?" Laura asked, hugging herself and frowning.

"No clue. But I hope not. He made a mistake. He may never make it right, but he'll have to work if he wants back in my good graces, at least."

"I can't believe the dude ever thought that would be a good idea! How could he not see how much he'd hurt Matt?" Kael began pacing again, his thick legs taking long strides across the living room and back again.

"I think he was telling the truth," Chris said, his voice low, causing Kael to raise an eyebrow at the moose. Chris was the last one he expected to believe the cat. "Matt has been really stressed out because he thinks he has to do all of this himself. It's no secret that I... like Matt, so I could see where Jay thought that trying to spread that burden around might help. I don't think it was a good idea, but I think I can understand where it came from."

"Poor Matt," Laura said. The white wolf stood up and moved towards her room. "He's probably crushed by this."

"The dude's always been a little emotional; He wears them on his sleeve. He'll be completely out of it for a while, I think."

"I just hope that it doesn't get Matt hurt or killed if he's distracted by this if and when he has to fight. We'll have to be there to help him out," Axel stated.

At least that was something they could all agree on.

* * * * *

It had been a week - seven days - since Jay's revelation.

Fifteen ignored calls from Jay. Thirty six disregarded text messages. Four skipped lectures, and twelve lectures that he might as well have skipped for all the attention he had paid them. Two missed police training sessions. One failed quiz.

It was easier for the math major to quantify his life rather than deal directly with the fact that he still hurt and was still angry. He knew logically that he was devastated, but it was still too difficult to bring that emotional part of himself to light to begin the healing process. He couldn't even bring himself to face Jay to give him back his stuff.

Three muscle shirts. One pair of jeans. One toothbrush, and one stick of deodorant. Seven books and two DVDs. Forty eight dollars to ship it all across town.

Matt realized that he was being unfair to his friends as well. They were just concerned, but the husky really couldn't face their stares. Every time one of them tried to talk to him, the conversation would inevitably end up reminding him of Jay. Hell, they couldn't even talk about Ameranth or magic, or classes or work, without it reminding him of the cougar.

Five dinners eaten in his bedroom. Two evenings where he fell asleep so early that he didn't even eat dinner. Twelve times the words, "Leave me alone," had been uttered through his bedroom door. Four jilted friends.

Even during his own training in Ameranth, it was difficult for the husky to concentrate. Rhisanth had backed off immediately, but Kazar had at one point commented that Matt was suddenly more isolationist than the black jaguar himself. And every single time Jason came around to chat, Matt made himself too busy to talk.

Two hundred fireballs. Forty three lightning bolts. Thirty three chunks of ice. Two blizzards. Eighteen wooden crates turned into splinters. Four times he had to stop, drop, and roll. Five excuses not to talk. Three times he passed out during training. Two irritated mentors.

The husky had even fallen back to the bad habit of not watching where he was going. Travelling the halls of the Easthaven Academy, lost in thought and bumping into other magi. During an afternoon nap on Earth where he had gotten pulled into Ameranth, Matt had decided to wander the Academy grounds rather than do any actual training. After blowing Kazar off and meandering mindlessly, eventually Matt found himself bumping into someone and getting knocked over.

"Hey, I've been looking for you."

Matt looked up and saw a cougar, then frowned. "Sorry, Jason. I've been busy."

"Jason?" The cougar reached out a paw to help Matt up. "Wow. I really fucked up if you're using my formal name."

Taking a closer look, Matt realized that he was speaking to Jay, not Jason. Instead of white robes, he was in a muscle shirt and jeans. Instead of pert, plain ears, his were laid flat and pierced. Rumbling in his chest, Matt batted aside Jay's proffered paw and stood himself up.

"Matt, stop, please, listen to me!" Jay said, following Matt as the husky stormed off. "I'm really sorry. I am! I miss you so much!"

"You should have thought of that before you sold us out to CSIS, Jay," Matt said over his shoulder, a growl in his voice.

"Just stop and talk, just for a minute!"

Matt did stop, but not because Jay asked. 'This is all wrong. I'm in Ameranth. How can Jay be here?'

"Thank you," Jay whispered when he caught up, but was cut off from any further speech by a raised paw.

Scanning the Academy grounds, Matt saw the ebony buildings of the magic school reflecting the fall sun. The pristine white marble walls that denoted the edge of the Academy and where the city began. Between hedges and benches were tile mosaics of fantastic creatures embedded in the earth. Furs in black, blue, and white robes walked and talked throughout the grounds.

But alongside the Easthaven Academy was his University. He could pick out the fifteen story brown-brick library, where furs dressed in jeans and t-shirts mingled carrying their textbooks and laptops. The student center with the campus bar and furs taking in the last days of sun and weather on the patio. The boxy building that was the Kinesiology department.

And then the furs began to meet. Some were confused, others thought there was a cosplay convention going on. Some magi had started putting up defenses. Some Earth furs had run from those displays of power.

"Jay."

"Matt?"

"Are you seeing what I'm seeing?"

"What are you... oh. Oh no. This isn't happening!"

Matt threw his bed sheets off and sat up so fast that he gave himself a headache. He was in his bedroom, still dressed from before his nap. The husky vaulted out of bed just as his phone began to ring and text messages rolled in.

"The university! Jay!"