Chapter 8 - Recouping

510 A.R. July 1** 4 *,* Volkov Household ***,* Morning

It felt like a pair of bellows in my neck as father drew breath, it was slow, steady, and I could hear the thump of his heart if I focused my ears. Mother was sleeping in front of me, she looked peaceful.

My own sleep had been shaky but to my surprise I had no nightmares, just thoughts running through my head.

The room brightened as the rays of the sun entered the room, mother stirred and shifted in bed before opening her eyes as she looked at me.

Father's arm grabbed me without warning and pulled me into an embrace, he snored and made a light grumble as his heavy muzzle came to rest on my neck. A mischievous smirk spread on mother's face as she snuggled her pillow and looked at me in silence.

I made an embarrassed smile but couldn't help but feel a warm sensation of comfort, it felt safe and the scents were calming.

Father seemed to wake and yawned which made me catch sight of the ribbed insides of his mouth and the ferocious fangs that reminded me of a saber toothed tiger.

Father cleared his throat and spoke up, "What?"

Mother snickered, "Did you get any sleep Vilkas?"

"A bit," I whispered as my ears folded back.

"Something wrong?" Father asked.

It seemed like a stupid question but there was something hidden inside it. It offered me two choices, wallow over what happened, bury myself in doubt and guilt, or move on, learn, grow, rebuild, and deal with things as time passed.

I smiled and answered, "I turn twenty in two weeks, I'm living at home, sleeping in my parent's bed."

"You're a wolf, I'd expect you to live here until you find a mate of your own," Father said.

"Is that typical for wolves?" I asked.

"Yes, your mother might not agree, but-"

Mother interjected, "You're free to live at home for as long as you want Vilkas, I'd prefer to have my mate to myself though."

I smiled and nodded, "Don't worry, I do prefer my own bed."

Father huffed, "Silly human fashions."

I shifted in bed and glanced back at father, "How much do you weigh dad?"

"230, why?"

"Kilos?" I asked in surprise.

"What else?" Father asked.

I made a sheepish smile, "I thought I had gained a lot of weight now that I'm 80."

Father made a slight grin, "You'll grow pup, don't worry about that. The teeth are a nasty business but you'll get used to it."

My ears perked, "What? Teeth?"

Father bared his huge fangs, "Teeth don't grow pup, you'll lose them in cycles until you're fully grown."

I sighed, "I had hoped I'd be rid of that unnerving experience."

"You will, once you're fully grown they'll fuse with your jaw and become strong enough to chew iron."

"You have to be joking?" I asked with a raised brow.

"Not really, wolves are built for strength and power," Father said with what sounded like pride.

"Uh huh. So what counts as a good amount of exercise and a proper diet?" I asked.

"I'll show you, it's about time you start using the gym in the basement," Father said.

Mother spoke up, "You never told us how things went at the study councilor?"

"She said... that my grades were good, and that they'd have no problem letting me join in august," I said.

Mother leaned in and patted my shoulder, "Good boy."

510 A.R.** July **** 1 *5* , **** Volkov Household *,* Midday**

The sound of the family car pulled me out of my daze. I sat up, blinked, and stretched as I realized that I had almost fallen asleep.

I got up and headed out of my room as I heard something heavy being moved outside.

My ears perked as I wandered over to the stairs and glanced down. Father approached the gaping hole in the front entrance and set a new door and a frame on the ground outside.

The house still smelled of blood and the walls downstairs were clean but seemed to have taken on a different hue. It unnerved me but I struggled to repress it as I descended the stairs.

Father returned from the car with another load of wood and a large box of tools, he set it down and glanced up as he noticed me.

"You don't need to be here Vilkas," Father said as I stepped onto the ground floor.

"I'm fine dad, how was the therapy session?" I asked.

Father made a disgruntled frown, "Boring, machines asking questions, doctors who think I'll open up to them like a book just because they ask for it."

"... But you are complying with them, right?" I asked as I inched closer to the front entrance.

Father nodded, "Yes I am."

My heart began to thump as I entered the spot where I had... ceased to be, it felt like a black hole drawing me toward it.

"Need some help?" I asked.

Father looked at me with hesitance, "You sure you're up for this Vilkas?"

I looked at the floor, the wooden panels along the wall, the broken entrance.

"I think this is therapeutic, tearing down the old, building something new. I want to help, and... I could use a lesson in how to work with my hands."

Father knelt down, opened the box, fetched a crowbar, and offered it to me with a rather relieved smile.

510 A.R.** July **** 1 *6* , **** Volkov Household *,* Midday**

I was sitting in the sofa with a pad in my hand. It waited for credentials and my clawed fingertips hovered above the screen as I wrestled with doubt.

You can't hide from it...

I entered the credentials and the screen faded as it was replaced with a desktop, I activated the browser, surfed to one the index sites, and was met with something different from what I was used to.

There was more, of everything, news-clips, databases, aggregated news sites. My eyes went wide as I saw an indicator along the top that showed what looked like a status update for the nation itself.

'RedWall: Armed Standby, GreenWall: AOK, PurpleWall: AOK'

'Orbital Defenses: AOK, Coastal Defenses: Minor Disruption (Maintenance Sector: G5)'

'MBA: AOK, Etemenanki: AOK, MagnaSystem: AOK'

I got up and brought the pad with me as I walked through the house in search for someone else.

My nose caught mother's fresh scent and I followed it into the garden. Mother was sitting by a table near her flower beds and seemed to be working on a big pad.

"Mom?" I asked.

She glanced back and made a slight smile, "Yes dear?"

I held out the pad and showed the vast difference on the index site, "What's this?"

"It looks like one the national index sites, why?" She asked.

"This... isn't what it looks like usually."

"Oh, right," Mother whispered.

The reality began to dawn on me, "My access to the web... it's been filtered... hasn't it?"

Mother was silent for a few moments before nodding, "Yes, anyone below twenty years of age is kept in a walled garden, there are exemptions to it though, such as receiving a symbiont."

"What about humans?" I asked.

"The twenty year rule applies to them as well," Mother answered.

I frowned and let my arm drop, "I was going to ask why, but the answer seems rather obvious. An unfiltered web is dangerous to youngsters as it might keep them from getting symbionts."

"Vilkas..." Mother whispered.

"Was it manipulated as well?" I asked.

Mother shook her head, "No, nothing has been manipulated, it's mostly discussion forums and news that have been hidden."

"Lovely," I whispered in disgust.

"You make it sound so evil," Mother whispered.

"It's just... you didn't even tell me it was filtered... I'm really starting to hate all of these lies and deceptions. Or is it just that I've been blind all these years?"

Mother looked hurt and glanced away, "It's not always easy being a parent Vilkas. We could have told you, we probably should have told you... but life is busy and it can be compelling to... forget."

"I understand on some level... but still."

Mother glanced at me with a troubled look, "We would never do something like this to hurt you."

I held up the pad once more, "I know. So what is this? Orbital defenses? Coastal defenses? I knew about the walls but it sounds like we're armed to the teeth."

"That's because we are Vilkas, the navy shields us from the sea, the walls from the land, the orbital defenses from the air."

I nodded, "Yeah, and I'm guessing that MBA is moon base Alpha?"

"That's right, and the MagnaSystem is the underground rail and the geothermal system."

I pointed at the one with the strange name, "And what's this 'Etemenanki'?"

"It's the tower that keeps the island safe from the lusus," Mother answered.

"I don't understand, I thought all the lusus were dead on this island?"

"They are, but the spores are everywhere, without the tower they would start spawning again."

"So what does the tower do? Is it some kind of shield or something?"

Mother shook her head, "It's like a gigantic factory producing our own version of the spores, it covers the island and keeps the harmful types from growing, like an immune system."

My ears perked, "We're breathing spores?"

"Harmless ones, the spores grow in the ground like bacteria and are designed to destroy any unknown ones."

"Harmless to hybrids you mean, how come humans survive?"

Mother smiled, "You're not thinking Vilkas, come on."

"... Humans today are descendents of the ones that survived the collapse, they're immune?"

Mother nodded, "That's right, out of thirteen billion only a few thousand survived."

I looked down on the pad, "Yeah."

Mother reached out and touched my arm, "What do you want me to say Vilkas?"

"Are there any more secrets?" I asked.

Mother made a light shrug, "You're a hybrid, you got your age restrictions lifted. There are no more veils hiding our society."

"Yeah, now it's just a matter of asking the right questions, " I said.

Mother made a surprised if somewhat proud smile, "Exactly."

My heart softened and my anger began to fade as I stepped closer and brushed shoulders with her.

"Sorry... I didn't mean to accuse you like this mom," I said.

"I understand Vilkas, more than you realize. The filter was in already in place when I grew up and I remember feeling betrayed... only to end up doing the same to you."

"Can I... ask you something?" I asked.

"Of course."

"What happened inside the house, after... you know?"

"Do we have to talk about this?" Mother asked.

"It's just... there's something I don't understand."

"About?"

"You reached out and shut the door, father tore it off its hinges. Why did you do that?" I asked.

Mother gulped, "I wanted to protect Jason."

"From dad?" I whispered.

Mother shook her head, "No, not from your dad, the unbridled unthinking fury, the feral rage."

"How did Jason react?" I asked.

"He... Can't you just let this go Vilkas?"

"I'm sorry, I can't."

"At first he screamed, then he grew quiet... really quiet. Catatonic, I had to drag him away."

"I see."

510 A.R.** July **** 1 *7* , **** Volkov Household *,* Evening**

The unrestricted web had a plethora of wild discussions and it touched on aspects of society in a way I had never seen before. Some of it discussed adult humans and it ranged from open calls to contain them to the more far more palatable call of co-existence.

Something was missing though, actual human representation and real impressions of other nations rather than the statistics that often filled its place.

I was becoming aware of how naïve I was of the world around me; but now that I sought answers it became difficult to find those or to even figure out the right questions.

Sophos was an isolated nation hiding behind walls, it begged the question of what really lay beyond.

One of the news indexes updated and a new story rose to the top.

'Raid on the Happy Trails organization'

My heart skipped a beat as I recognized the name. I reached out, hovered a finger by the link, and pressed. A video started and showed a female feline standing in front of a large sealed off area that looked like a typical summer camp.

A small information window showed that the news were hours old as well as the name of the reporter.

' Paige Hinton'

The feline spoke and motioned to the area behind her as drones hovered the air while officers worked in the background.

"Early this morning the camps owned and operated by the Happy Trails organization were raided on charges of child abuse. Official reports indicate that over a hundred children have been removed from the premises and that all adults have been arrested until further notice."

"The organization is well known as a religious youth center for humans and its link with the controversial Unicostal sect. Records also indicate that the raid was initiated following a testimony from one of its members. Rumors say that there could be a link with the recent incident in Pasloe."

Loud voices could be heard in the background and the feline glanced back for a moment before continuing.

"If the allegations turn out to be true, then the consequences could be severe as the organization counts 6% of the human population as members. We'll keep you updated as the situation develops."

510 A.R. July 21, Volkov Household, Morning

I tapped at the phone and let it ring.

Someone answered, "James Grohol speaking."

"Hi James, it's Vilkas," I said.

"Oh, hi Vilkas."

"I was wondering how Jason's doing?" I asked.

"Jason's doing good."

"That's good to hear... Do you think I could come see him?" I asked.

"No, not yet Vilkas," James answered.

"That's what you've been saying for the last week."

"Yes, and it won't change until Jason wants visitors, and his condition allows it."

"How about a meeting over the phone then?" I asked.

"No," James answered.

I sighed, "Does he ever... talk about me?"

"You know I can't discuss that Vilkas."

"Does he at least know that I want to talk with him?" I asked.

"We've informed Jason that you've called."

"I see."

"Just be patient Vilkas, OK?"

"... Sure."

"I have to run Vilkas, how about I call you when Jason's ready?"

"What if you forget?" I asked.

"I have Athena to support me, she'll make sure I won't forget. All right?"

"Fine," I whispered.

"Bye Vilkas."

"Bye," I said as the line went dead.

510 A.R. July 28, Volkov Household, Night

"Damn it," I whispered as a screw clattered and fell into the computer case.

I adjusted the light, exchanged the screwdriver for a magnetized one, and reached inside the case as I tried to catch the screw.

My hand felt big because of the fur and I couldn't grasp the screwdriver with the same finesse I used to, it made it difficult but I heard a light clink as I caught hold of the screw.

I brought it out with a wonder how father could work as an engineer given his size, then again, maybe he did design or something that didn't require hands-on work.

I gave it a second try, got the screw into place, attached the cables, flipped the computer case up and pushed the power button.

The screen lit up the room as the computer booted, it recognized the new support processor, configured it, and then brought up the desktop.

I sat down in front of the computer and then felt myself stumped as I had installed my birthday gift yet I had no one to play with, nor did I have the interest to try something new.

It made me feel empty and I found myself longing for the pack. I wanted to be in their presence, to learn more about them, and it made me wish they had been here for my birthday.

My eyes stumbled on the desktop's contact list and I caught sight of Jason's contact and the marker that indicated he was offline.

It made me wonder if I was ever going see Jason again as I considered the possibility that he might hate and blame me for the death of his father. Then again, maybe we would simply grow apart until I forgot about him.

One of the options was tolerable but the mere thought that I would forget scared me. The thought got lodged in my head and it didn't take long before I found myself standing by the window as I observed Jason's now dark and desolate house.

I made my way to the door, eased it open, and tiptoed into the hallway before descending the stairs. My fingers unlocked the door to the garden with a gentle click before I sneaked out and headed to the now gaping hole in the fence.

I stepped through and circled the house until I reached the second balcony from which we had rescued Jason. I jumped, caught hold of the ledge and pulled myself up with a slight grunt of exertion as I clambered onto the balcony.

My hands felt the sliding door and gave it a light tug, to my relief the door was unlocked and slid open giving me access to the house.

The air wafting from within was stale but it still screamed of their scents. I drew a deep breath, steeled myself, and then stepped inside what looked like a guest room that had little of interest.

I moved on, stepped into the hallway and stopped in front of Jason's room. My heart began to thump as I looked down the dark hallway and imagined some crazed human coming at me.

The place was silent though and there wasn't even the gentle whisper of the wind. It unnerved me but I decided to hurry up as I grabbed the handle and opened Jason's door.

My nose scrounged up and I made a disgusted grimace as it stank of old sweat and molded food mixed with Jason's scent. It was far from pleasant but I ignored it as I stepped inside and looked around.

The electronics were still missing but the stocked bookcases remained. There were a few sketches, stuff from his childhood, an old tooth in a jar, a few books with a religious theme and other useless memorabilia that didn't awaken anything inside me.

My heart sank as I began to question why I was here.

I walked over to his messy bed as an idea struck.

"Forgive me," I whispered as I knelt down and decided to glance under the bed.

There were a few boxes hidden underneath the bed, I gave them a gentle push only to realize that they were empty. Something was revealed though, hiding behind the boxes.

It was a rather small semi-transparent plastic box with something inside it.

I reached in, caught it, and eased it out from underneath.

Please don't be his porn collection...

The plastic blurred the contents so I grabbed hold of the lid and opened it.

Inside were decorative memory chips that I recognized from our childhood, they were rectangular and thin with a set of shielded contacts on one end while the other was fitted with a keyring. The surface itself was emblazoned with logos and markers of the games it contained.

The sight of them made me smile and I knew that I had found what I was looking for.

I began to look them through hoping to find a very particular and important one, something that could work as a beacon in case I would ever forget my old self.

I had almost reached the bottom as I caught sight of it. My padded finger ran along the surface of the chip and I felt the light bumps of the emblazoned surface.

Space, stars, galaxies, a hundred species, an epic struggle of survival. Galactic Conquest.

My throat tightened a little as I pocketed it and pushed the box into place underneath the bed.

510 A.R. August 12, Institute of Technology, Morning

I found it easy to recognize the other first year students as I stepped into the hallway. They were glancing about with a rather nervous look as they seemed to compare themselves to others while focusing on not sticking out.

I found myself bemused for some reason as I realized I had already failed at blending in.

The others had more clothes, jackets, light trinkets, bags, books. I on the other hand only had a simple pair of shorts, a dress shirt, and a small digital pad in my hand.

Others began to glance over at me and I returned the favor as I caught them.

The first one was a male deer, his fur looked short and the antlers on his head were little more than nubs. The second was a male slim husky with a strong contrast of black and white.

The third was a female bear that rivaled my own stature, she stared for a few moments but then let go.

The fourth was one of the odder ones, a male goat, he met my eyes and then made a slight nod. I nodded back and figured that my worry over being a wolf might have been overstated.

I decided to approach and joined the goat's side. I was taller than him and the goat was forced to raise his head a little.

"Hi, I'm Vilkas," I said.

"Frederick," he answered.

"Do you live around here?" I asked.

Frederick shook his head, "I'm from the region but it's a smaller village called Aldmerrow."

I glanced up and noticed that we had now become the center of attention.

"What?" I asked out loud.

The ears of everyone else perked in surprise before they glanced away in embarrassment.

I looked back at Frederick and saw a bemused smile on his short muzzle.

"Are you by yourself?" Frederick asked.

"Yeah, or what do you mean?" I asked.

"Nothing," Frederick answered as if hiding something.

"You thought a whole pack would run through here and cause trouble?" I asked.

Frederick's smiled widened as if caught, "Something like that."

"Does that happen a lot or something?"

Frederick glanced up at me and shrugged, "I dunno, we're all new to being... part of it all you know. I finished my change just a month ago."

I offered my hand to him, "Well I'm a good guy, and I hope you'll be able to look past the fangs and red fur."

Frederick made a pleased nod and took my hand, "I'm getting that impression, nice to make your acquaintance Vilkas."

My tail began to wag as I glanced around once more, to my surprise the atmosphere seemed to have changed as the others had started talking to each other.

"Likewise," I answered.

"So do you have a pack?" Frederick asked.

"Well... yes, but I've only met them once so far."

"Is it true that you... hunt?" Frederick asked.

I glanced around and lowered my voice, "Yes."

"I see," Frederick whispered.

"Is it true that you eat grass?" I whispered.

Frederick's wooly ears perked and he made a slight frown, "No, it isn't."

I made a slight if evil grin, "Just messing with you."

Frederick sighed and gave me a light nudge as he knocked shoulders with me.

The sound of rushed footsteps and intense sniffing caught my attention. I looked up and turned my head just as the sound came around the corner.

A black wolf with stark yellow eyes came to an almost skidding halt before looking around as he huffed the air. I recognized the wolf and the scent brought by the rush of air confirmed it, Kato.

Kato looked in my direction and caught my eyes as he made a wolfish grin. I could almost feel the others tense up as Kato marched up to me.

"I knew I smelled you Vilkas!" Kato exclaimed as he brushed up to me and caught my arm.

"Uh, Kato?" I whispered.

"You're coming with me pup," Kato said as he pulled me out of the group.

I followed him around the corner to an empty spot before we stopped, Kato was quick to lean in as he put his muzzle next to mine. Instinct took over as we exchanged scents and nudged each other in a friendly gesture of greeting.

"You know, things like that might be why people are so cautious around wolves," I said as I leaned back.

Kato smirked, "Maybe, nice to see you again."

It was strange but I agreed, "Likewise Kato, how's the pack?"

Kato stepped back and made a proud smile, "Good, what about your own?"

I made an uncertain shrug, "I've only met them once, but I'm going to my clan gathering next month so I'm hoping to catch up."

Kato smiled and his tail began to wag, "Are you the alpha of your pack?"

"Beta," I said.

"I see. Know what clan you belong to now?"

"Silverfang," I answered.

Kato's ears perked, "Ah, the high and mighty."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"You don't know? The Silverfangs are influential, it's not that weird though since they're one of the oldest clans."

"Uh huh."

Kato inched closer and stared me in the eyes as his nose flared.

"What?" I asked.

"Just... is it... true?" Kato whispered.

"What do you mean?" I whispered in confusion.

Kato inched even closer and then reached out, his hand touched my shoulder and found the scar.

"It is true," Kato said with an amazed look as he let go.

I stepped back and made an irritated frown, "Please don't tell anyone, I don't want it to get out."

Kato nodded and moved one of his fingers across his lips, "My muzzle is sealed."

"How did you know?" I asked.

"A wolf was attacked, there were whispers and you knew that human, plus, I was here when that psycho came to visit. It wasn't difficult to put it together," Kato answered.

I cocked my head in confusion, "What are you talking about? Who came to visit?"

"I guess you didn't see it, it happened the same day you came to visit with that human."

"So what happened?" I asked.

"That old guy came here searching for your friend, he was quite frantic but managed to find him. They started arguing and the old guy tried to drag your friend out of here. Something happened though and it made the old guy go back off in an instant."

"I... had no idea something like that happened."

"Well, it's over now and you seem to be doing well Vilkas."

"Yeah," I whispered.

Kato brushed shoulders with me, "Cheer up, and good hunting at the gathering."

I smiled and nodded, "Thanks Kato."