Cabin Helper
Fixing up a story I wrote a while ago. I'm trying to figure out if I should keep it up or not. I have a hard time following through with things and if enough people like it and that its better than the last one. I'll be sure to keep practicing and expanding on my work. I don't always ask, but if you would be so kind to leave a comment of what you think of it after you read it. I would be very happy for any amount of input.
Sample:
Wearing a simple white shirt, stained with a few spots of blood and pitch, and faded gray slacks, missing a half of a leg and held up by a dirty old red sash. The young looking rabbit was leaning against the large wooden helm of the ship. A dazed look on his face while staring up at the stars above, added with the moon it gave a good deal of light to make the ocean sparkle like silver. Ship rocking lightly to the waves, the rabbit shifted and looked around for a moment. Holding back a yawn and could not keep it from coming out. Stretching his arms above his to stretch himself out caused him to almost jump out of his fur. Though it was not the stretch and yawning that pricked his nerves and almost had him screaming into the sky. A clawed paw and pressed onto his shoulder and pushed him forward into the large wheel in front of him.
"Growing tired young one?" A voice whispered into one of his long ears. It got him to turn his head and the sharp features of his captain's face came into view.
"Sleeping on the job, eh, cabin boy?" The second question made the rabbit shake his head quickly.
"No Captain." He replied quickly worried that he was now going to get into a lot of trouble. The dragon shaped captain standing behind him. "J - Just stretching is all." He added when that smiling maw leaned in closer, a shiver went up his spine as the nose pressed into his neck and could feel the inhale of breath.
A groan came from behind the pinned rabbit, "You smell so tasty!"
A wet tongue replaced the nose and got dragged up under the ear and into the loop lightly. "Captain?" the rabbit asked in a worried voice as he noticed his Captain's body pressing closer to his own and it was easy to feel something quit large rubbing into the small of his back.