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The Customs Officer By Danath August 2014 danath.sofurry.com

* * *

"Next, please."

A serronian in long red robes approached my kiosk. Several dozen impatient travelers waited anxiously behind him, a few humans like me included. The serronian's face had what I'd been told was their equivalent of a smile: lips pulled back, grate-like dentures exposed, eyes bulging out the sides of their heads. I'd heard other officers refer to them as fish, and I couldn't avoid the comparison as I motioned for him to place his palm on the sensor.

The biometric system pulled up his information. Del'u Marmarkaramar Od. Merchant. Earth's biodiversity was rare among interstellar civilizations. Not all managed to achieve a Type II culture without suffering mass extinctions. As such, merchants like Del'u often explored the various DNA and chemical compositions unique to the native fauna and flora. It also meant they often tried to sneak samples off-world, a strictly prohibited act. Earth's economy was based on its biodiversity. It couldn't be patented, according to law, but it could be protected from outside influences. Other planets didn't mind, since early samples of bullfrogs from the Amazon turned out to be a very effective chemical weapon against one species. Other examples of misuses of Earth's natural resources abounded. The black market attempted to flourish, but if there was one thing humans were good at by this point, it was fighting poachers, as the herds of rhinos still roaming the African plains could attest.

"Destination?" I asked.

The fish blinked. "Home."

That would be Delrakaralaralakarakka, the serronian's home planet a short trip away - at least in interstellar terms. He was still smiling at me. It made me uncomfortable - most serronians found smiling painful after a short time. Their flaky, silvery skin dried quickly in open air and lost its flexibility.

"Are you transporting any biological or mineral samples of specimens native to Earth?"

"Of course not!"

He nearly blubbered. The biosensors confirmed what I'd already guessed: a liar. It was funny, but with all the technology, all the programming, all the biometrics, most of the time, a good customs officer could spot the smuggler from a mile away. Thanks to the tight control exercised over Earth's skies, ships couldn't land without a United Earth Alliance cruiser getting there within minutes. Smugglers could only get in and out of the planet through customs.

"Sir, please step this way."

A few other customs officers glanced over at me as I stepped out of my kiosk. Another officer stepped in to take my place and help the next person in line as I followed Del'u across the concourse.

There were four ports on Earth, centrally located on the major continents. This domed structure sat square in the middle of the district of North Dakota, one of the many former American districts that kept its old, pre-UEA name. The bright blue sky overhead used to shine down on endless fields of wheat, but now a sprawling city had grown up around the port, stretching dozens of miles in each direction. The shuttles taxied up the runways, busily carrying passengers to the station miles above, from where the interstellar ships launched. There were no customs on those stations, just regular security, so the room for error in missing any illicit materials was low.

Del'u walked towards the door, which lit up as the path extended ahead of him. I followed him in and motioned for him to sit at a table. He sunk into his robes as he sat, looking smaller by the moment. A serronian defense mechanism: not fearing them because they looked tiny was an advantage for the clever fish in ancient days; now, it was a cultural thing, signifying respect, fear, and a variety of other emotional states, though to most non-serronians telling the difference between what each slightly different quiver meant was difficult. I had a feeling this one was definitely fear, though.

Another customs officer, John, arrived with Del'u's luggage. He set it on a table near the far wall and opened the container.

"You... you can't!"

"Mr. Del'u, all passengers traveling through UEA Customs are subject to search of their personal belongings and their person at any time," I said. "All rights to protection from unreasonable search and seizure were waived the moment you stepped foot in the spaceport."

He shrunk further. His eyes bulged further. I tried not to stare. It was kind of gross.

"Would you like to tell us what we'll find in your luggage, Mr. Del'u?"

Information scrolled up the inside of my contacts. The tiny microcomputers connected to the Customs Office's central database. Mr. Del'u had been busy. He'd spent a month in Africa, then a week in southern Asia on several islands, before flying all the way to North America for departure. He'd arrived at the European port. Someone was covering their tracks.

"I demand to speak to my government's representative!"

"That is already being arranged," I said. I heard John rustling around in one of the crates. There were two, each about four feet long, three feet wide, and two feet deep. The crates were made of blue polyplastics. The locks had been removed during the regular search when Del'u had checked in. If they missed something, it meant we'd be taking apart the containers totally.

"I won't speak until I see my representative!"

"That's your prerogative, Mr. Del'u." I wondered, briefly, whether "Mister" was the appropriate honorific. "I should inform you of several factors, however, before you decide whether or not you will cooperate."

The serronian grew an inch or so and snorted defiantly.

"First," I said, ignoring him, "if you are found in possession of any Earth-native organic or mineral materials in this spaceport, the law assumes you are trying to smuggle them. Second, there is no trial or court of law. You will be placed directly into one of Earth's famous penitentiaries."

They were famous, since they were all in the Antarctic. They were well-maintained, of course, with regular inspections and basic amenities provided, as per the various treaties the UEA signed with the governments of convicts sent there. It was nice, but not exactly pleasant. The weather didn't help.

"Third, the Delrakaralaralakarakkan government has an anti-smuggling treaty with us. They will not intervene in what they will consider an internal UEA affair."

Del'u's eyes practically popped out of his skull. I almost felt bad for him, but I was mostly tickled that I'd managed to say the damn name of his planet correctly.

"The only advice I will offer you, Mr. Del'u, is that cooperation is appreciated. You may not believe me, but if you cooperate, show us what you're hiding, and give us no trouble, your sentence will be reduced."

Del'u's head grew and shrunk and grew and shrunk by an inch or so. His eyes looked around the room, over to where John was busily cutting into his case.

"Found it, Ted."

"Fine! Fine, I admit it! The case lining. Sheets of different metals to confuse the scanners."

Del'u slumped into the chair, mouth disappearing into his red robes. I nodded.

"And what are you smuggling?"

"Samples."

"Of?"

"Animals."

I heard a crack and glanced back at John. He'd wrenched open the inside lining, exposing the layers of metals. Sandwiched in the middle were small polyplastic packages.

"For what purpose?"

Del'u shook his head. "Is this... necessary?"

"For our investigation, yes. Keep in mind, Del'u, that your cooperation is very much appreciated and will be reflected in your final sentence."

The serronian frowned, an act that retracted the eyeballs and caused the jowls to droop. When a serronian wanted to look sad, boy, did they ever look sad.

"I am researching aphrodisiacs," he finally said.

Figures. Pharmaceutical companies balked at the restrictions placed on research and development, which was required to take place on the surface in regulated facilities. Anything developed or derived from Earth-native anything was owned by the UEA, who would license the products to the companies to market and distribute in their home systems, all enforced by the power of various treaties. If the pharmaceuticals could sneak the substances off Earth, however, they could modify the resulting products enough to claim they were in-house developments not related to Earth at all. There were half a dozen major legal battles over this very thing employing many thousands of lawyers on a dozen different worlds.

I got the company name and his contacts from him. He transferred all the data he'd collected as well. There was quite a lot of information about mating habits of various felines. He had quite the collection of DNA: lion, puma, tiger, panther, and even cheetah. How'd he'd managed that, I wasn't sure, but I was impressed. Too bad he wasn't as good of a liar as he was at collecting samples. The more he talked, the easier it was for him to spill the beans. That was the thing with smugglers: they were often hired couriers. Their paycheck ended with the job. Corporations couldn't send their own in order to maintain culpable deniability. The mucky-mucks at Del'u's company would claim they'd never heard of him before. Still, the UEA would sanction them in some way, slap them on the wrist, so to speak, and the whole process would repeat.

"Thank you, Mr. Del'u. You've been very cooperative," I said finally. "Is there anything else you'd like to tell us before your sentence is read?"

He gurgled. I proceeded.

"Del'u Marmarkaramar Od, you have been found guilty of smuggling Earth-native fauna and/or flora. The maximum sentence for this crime is thirty years imprisonment. That's Earth years, which would be around..." I twitched my eye, calling up the appropriate conversion. "...49 Delrakaralaralakarakkan cycles."

He looked even more sad. I took an extra year off. Maybe I was going soft.

"Considering that this is your first offense and that you have cooperated in the investigation into your crimes, you will be remanded to the custody of the UEA Antarctic Penitentiary for eight years. You will be eligible for early release based on behavior. When you are released, you will be forbidden from coming within 100 light years of Earth for the rest of your life. Do you understand your sentence?"

Another gurgle, which I took for a yes.

"Again, Mr. Del'u, thank you for your cooperation."

The door behind the serronian opened. Two of the UEA transport guards came in. They wore black body armor, helmets, and carried stun guns. They shackled Del'u's boneless arms behind him and frog-marched him to a waiting transport.

"What's that for you this month, Ted? Four?"

I leaned back in my chair and stretched my arms over my head. "Yeah, that was number four. I'm on fire!"

"Ow! Shit!"

I jumped up and ran over to John. He clutched his hand and scowled.

"Cut it on the case. Wasn't paying attention. Pretty deep, too."

I glanced at the crate and realized John's hand wasn't the only thing that had been torn open. One of the polyplastic packages was ripped. A few moments later the seals around the outside of the room clamped shut, cutting off all access to the room. John rolled his eyes at me.

"Come on, we don't need quarantine procedures. I just cut my hand, I didn't..."

He stopped talking when I pointed at the torn polyplastic bag. I leaned in close, but there were no identifying marks on the bags themselves and nothing to cross-reference them with in the data I'd received from Del'u. I was able to check what the samples were stored in. Smugglers often suspended them in various cocktails to disguise what they really were. Unfortunately, I wasn't sure what it was Del'u had used. Probably something he'd brought on the way in.

"T... Ted..."

I looked over at John. His hand trembled and I stared, incredulous, as thick, shiny black fur grew out of his skin. The growing fur expanded quickly from the area around the cut. He dropped to his knees, gasping, clutching at his chest. I sent the signal for a contamination emergency and an alarm sounded outside the door. The seals wouldn't open for an hour. If the contaminant were known, we could have the room sprayed with something to neutralize it, but this was a custom job. The computer could only do so much with the data Del'u gave me without a chemical analysis.

"John? John, can you breathe? Are you okay?"

I wanted to try to reassure him, but I also didn't want to touch him and risk contamination myself. Something had obviously gone wrong with the alien's containment system and caused a reaction. I tensed as I watched John hunch over on his knees, one hand gripped around his other wrist. Black, glossy fur sprouted rapidly up his arm, growing in under his short-sleeved uniform. The fabric stretched taut as the changes continued, only increasing in pace as I stared, horrified.

John's slashed hand looked more like a paw now. It uncurled, exposing smooth pads on the palm; there was no sign of the nasty cut that had been there a few moments before. The front of his shirt stretched outwards as his groaning turned into something distinctly more pleasurable sounding.

I glanced towards the door. Where was the decontamination units? The siren was still going off out in the hallway. The door! Of course, the intercom... I'd been rooted to the spot and forgotten all about it.

"John, just... don't move," I said, not knowing what else I could say to him. He either didn't hear me or ignored me. I dashed to the door and slapped my palm against the button.

"Ted! Ted! Can you hear us?"

The seals around the room had cut off any visuals, so nobody could see what was going on inside.

"Yes, I'm here. Ted cut his hand on the Delraka... the Delrakara... the alien's case!"

"We have decontamination units standing by, but the computer fail safes won't let us in until the active agents are lowered."

"Active agents?"

"Limited readings show massive amounts of airborne chemicals of some kind. We can't tell what and until we're sure our filters are working, we're not coming in." There was a pause. "Sorry, Ted."

"You've got to get us out!" I screamed. "John is... he's... he's changing!"

"Ted, just stay calm. Keep John calm. Everything will be okay."

A deep, dangerous, and loud rumble echoed through the room. The hairs on the back of my neck stood.

"John? What was that? John? John!"

I ignored the intercom and slowly turned around, fearing what I might see. John was still hunched over, but the shirt had split in half over his backside, now covered in a thick layer of black fur. Despite the hair, I could still see muscles shifting underneath. John looked bigger than before, too, even kneeling.

His head lifted and I whimpered, backing up into the corner, ignoring the commands from the intercom to report what was happening. His face... John now had the head of a large black panther. His muzzle was broad, with long whiskers sticking out the sides. Large golden eyes focused on me, and I stared back as the vertical slits of his pupils narrowed. He turned, getting onto his feet, facing me.

His tattered blue shirt hung by a few buttons around his chest and shoulders. I tried to make myself invisible as his nostrils flared again. His chest was enormous. I mean, porn stars would be jealous. As I watched, it swelled further. Fat pink nipples as big as my fist capped each, poking through the shreds of blue fabric.

John's legs opened, knees going to the sides as he crouched on his feet. His black pants hugged every inch of his legs, exposing the growth in his calves and thighs. I heard myself whimper again when I saw the bulge in the front: a clearly outlined cock more than a foot long, curling upwards and slightly to the right, pushing obscenely outwards against the cloth, which clearly outlined the thick tube, from the base to the crown. Beneath, two swells similarly drew the fabric taut. Each of his balls was as big as my head. He had to be eight feet tall.

When he slowly stood, I revised my guess. Nine feet, minimum.

A large black-furred paw dragged the fabric off his chest as he stared at me, whiskers twitching, tongue running over his plump black lips. I really didn't like the way he was staring at me.

"Teeeeeeeed," he moaned.

Huge claws erupted from his black boots, tearing them open. Black toes pushed through a few moments later. He took a step towards me and growled deep in his chest as his feet kicked his boots, trying to dislodge them from his ankles, where they were squeezed tightly. He took another step before leaning over, swiping at them with his claws, ripping them right off his legs.

I drew back, away from his outstretched fingers, eyes locked on the two-inch claws extending from the tips of his fingers.

"J... John?" I said. "What... what..."

The feline pounced. I gasped as a heavy, warm weight pinned me to the wall. A paw grabbed my hair and tugged my head backwards, exposing my throat. I was about to piss myself when, instead of feeling the sharp tear of fangs digging into my skin, instead I felt a broad, wet tongue rasp along the side of my face.

"John!"

The panther didn't reply other than to grind against him, thrusting his hips into mine, grinding the oversized package still trapped in his too-small pants. A series of growls and purrs drowned out the repeated calls on the intercom as he covered my face in kisses and licks. Claws stroked down my shoulders, lightly scratching my skin as they delicately tore through my shirt. Soon, I was naked from the waist up.

I tried to speak again, but the massive muzzle closed around my face. I jerked as sharp teeth caught my lower lip, piercing my skin, just enough to draw a little blood, but not enough to do any real damage. I couldn't move away as my head was already against the wall behind me. There was nothing I could do as the panther's tongue invaded my mouth.

A strange feeling crept up on me, emanating from where John had bit my lower lip. I groaned and twitched, struggling to slide to one side or the other, but the panther was too strong and held me fast. I could feel the bulge of his erection grinding into my belly as his breasts flattened over my chest.

My lips parted, stretching around his tongue as he turned his head to the side to go even deeper into the kiss. I tried to resist, but the strange feelings grew stronger. My heart raced and my lower lip ached.

The feeling of fur on skin is something I'm familiar with. I had a dog for a pet growing up. The feeling of fur on fur, however, was not something I was used to. When I felt John's hairy chin rub against mine, I was introduced to the pleasurable sensation.

The panther's head dropped. His mouth opened over my neck, slathering my jugular with his tongue. The heat of his muzzle was intense. My knees shook as his teeth closed lightly, pricking my skin. I reached a hand up and felt my face.

No more smooth skin there. Instead, fur. I rubbed my cheeks and neck. More fur. My face itched abominably for the next few moments as I pressed my fingers into my reshaped nose, feeling the long muzzle I now possessed. The changes proceeded as quickly in me as they had in John, and within a few minutes I was panting, red tongue hanging out over my chin. John's muzzle explored my belly as fur grew in under his eager tongue. Lust filled my brain, making my thoughts hazy, as my chest swelled.

I held up my arms and watched with fascination as a deep layer of thick white fur crawled up my wrists and over my fingers. I closed my hands as they itched unbearably for several moments, like my face had. When I reopened them, I had delicate pink paw pads on my palms.

The more I changed and grew, the more aggressive John became. I purred back at him, churring deep in my throat, as his claws tore open my pants. An erection I hadn't realized I had popped free and I groaned as his muzzle opened, swallowing it. I reached for his ears, leaning over him, my breasts already large enough to drape over his ears as I shoved my hips forward, burying my cock in the back of his throat. It felt incredible.

He drew back after a few moments and I looked down. My dick was huge, like his, but I couldn't tell how big because he dove right back down on it. One of his paws cupped my testicles, groping and squeezing the cantaloupe-sized balls, each one coated in thick white fur. Before long I was humping his muzzle heavily as my tail whipped back and forth between my legs.

Tails are an unusual thing to possess as well. Mine appeared to have mostly a mind of its own, as it curled around my ankle or wiggled in air without me needing to do much about it. John's tail, I noticed, stuck almost straight out each time my growing erection hit the back of his muzzle.

Lust surged inside me as he suckled my smooth pink shaft. I grabbed for one of my breasts with a paw and squeezed the tit at the end, gasping as a wave of pleasure washed over me. I was taller now, like John, and fully covered in thick white fur. I licked my lips, which felt fatter than before, more plump and juicy.

The black panther's muzzle stretched as I came. It happened quickly, without warning. One moment I was sliding between his smooth lips, the next I was cumming uncontrollably. John's eyes closed as I leaned back, growling and moaning and purring. I wrapped my paws around his head, keeping him down, lodging my cock in the back of his throat. God, it felt so good... he swallowed around the rigid tip and I keened helplessly as pleasure overwhelmed my brain.

When I recovered, I certainly felt good. John pulled off my shaft, breathing hard through his nostrils as his lips cleaned my shaft. I was still rock hard when I finally popped free.

He didn't wait long. He stood and grabbed me, twisting me around, shoving me against the wall. I moaned and pressed my palms flat to the concrete as he grabbed my tail and jerked it upwards. The sounds of shredding fabric were music to my ears because I realized it meant his cock was free as well.

A moment later, he leaned into me heavily. His breasts squeezed flat to my backside, pushing me harder against the wall. His belly trapped my upturned tail between our bodies as his cock poked between my legs. I growled and pushed back as his tip found not my ass, but my pussy. What else had I not noticed until this moment? Of course, having breasts, it kind of made sense the other equipment had grown in as well.

There wasn't time to think about it further, though, because when he plunged inside me, I felt a heat like I'd never experienced before. There was a moment of pain and uncomfortableness as he took my virginity, but it passed as he kept going, driving into me, filling me with his heavy, hard shaft. For a fleeting moment, I wondered what color it was. Was it pink, like mine? Or darker red? Maybe black?

Teeth closed on my shoulder. His hips humped hard and fast, driving his smooth stalk in and out of my aching lips with powerful strokes. I pushed back against him even as his heavy body pinned me to the wall. His paws ran over my arms, going flat to the back of my paws, as our bodies worked in unison, setting up a hard rhythm. Every now and then I heard noises from the intercom, but they were mostly drowned out by the lustful noises John made into my ears. His teeth were everywhere: my shoulders, my ears, my neck. He licked his way up my spine and I moaned luxuriously, clenching even more tightly around his thick, massive cock. He felt huge and incredible inside me; each time his massive nuts smacked against the back of my thighs, I was that much closer to going over the edge. My cock splattered cum against the wall as he pounded me harder, deeper, faster...

The world went white. A dual orgasm ripped through me. I couldn't breathe, couldn't move, couldn't speak. Each of his grunts ricocheted through the room as my ears twisted back and my head lifted. Maybe he sensed what I was going through; maybe he didn't. Either way, he did the right things: one of his large paws slid up my chest, over my breasts, and wrapped around my neck, pulling me back away from the wall. His muzzle clamped onto my other shoulder as his free paw reached for my cock. I could feel nothing but him, his paws and teeth and shaft and body, muscular and firm, grinding into me, taking me, mating me. His growls grew more desperate as I painted the wall in front of me with cum and drizzled feminine honey over the fat shaft still plunging into my clenching pussy.

When he came, I could feel each shot of panther cum roping into my guts. I leaned back heavily, wanting to feel all of him, and shuddered as his thighs pushed into the back of my legs. His breasts squeezed my backside as his paws stroked down over my chest, alternating between grasping at my nipples and going lower to stroke my belly or tease my jerking, spurting shaft. His locked legs held us up as he came inside me.

Despite having cum twice already, my shaft stayed hard. I groaned as I felt John's length flex inside me and wriggled with pleasure. The panther's muscular arms held me tight as we both enjoyed the shared pleasure. Of course, standing around wasn't what I was interested in. After John pulled himself free (with much moaning and keening on my part, I'll admit), I turned the tables on him.

Well, I turned him on the table, at least. He went sprawling across it, on his backside, legs already lifting into the air. I licked my lips and moved in between his powerful thighs, stroking my paws up his sides against the lie of his fur. My huge cock pushed up against his testicles, squeezing into them, forcing a few more thick squirts of cum from his shaft. He groaned as I reached forward, grabbing at his breasts, squeezing them roughly, massaging his heavy swells. Did they even make bras large enough to hold knockers like these?

I reached down with both paws. He grunted as I lifted his nuts with one paw and guided my cock with the other. I found the entrance to his pussy and shoved in hard. Like me, he shrieked as his virginity was taken, but within a few moments growled and moaned as before.

He felt heavenly. His insides were so tight and warm and slick and my cock was so big I could feel all of him clenching around it. I didn't stop pushing until my sheath was crinkled up against his pussy lips. John shuddered and groaned, paws gripping the edges of the table, legs hooked over my shoulders. I grabbed his hips, digging my claws into his pelt, and thrust again and again and again.

Each forward jab was better than the last. No wonder he was making such loud noises when he'd fucked me; I'm sure I was even noisier than him. I couldn't control myself as my tail whipped behind me. This was carnal. This was bestial. This was heat. I loved it; any worries about my current state were obliterated by the pleasure.

Those worries stayed away for the next few hours. John and I did everything to each other. I tasted his cock three times, he went down on me several times as well. I brought him to climax by fucking him, by sucking him, and by tonguing him. He returned each favor with even more excitement. The floor was awash in white, pungent panther cum as we fucked each other stupid, until we were eventually too exhausted to go on. We lay together on the floor, half under the table, in each other's arms, chests squeezing together as we lazily made out. Our tails twined up, wrapping around themselves, as our heavy cocks dripped between us.

I was at least a foot and a half long. My breasts were as big as beach balls. Our faces could barely meet above them, considering his were just as big. His cock was the same size as well. In fact, except for the fur color, we could have been twins.

The intercom had gone silent some time ago, but crackled back into life.

"Ted?"

I pulled back from John and purred. He shook his head.

"We'll have to answer them eventually." His voice was deeper now than before. There was a slightly rough edge to it, like mine.

"Eventually," I agreed, as I rolled him onto his backside and pushed my cock under his heavy balls, finding his rump. I went for his ass this time, enjoying the way he shivered and groaned when I stroked him as I pumped inside.

Eventually turned out to be several more hours away.

* * *

Three months later...

"Next, please."

A familiar-looking serronian stepped up to my kiosk, eyes bulging, though whether it was surprise or something else, I wasn't sure.

"Mr. Del'u," I said, stretching my plump lips into a massive smile.

"Yes, that's me."

"You don't recognize me, Mr. Del'u?"

The serronian appeared confused for a moment, but soon squawked and shrunk backwards as he realized who I was. I couldn't help but smile even larger, which had the inadvertent side effect of displaying all of my teeth. All of them.

"Don't worry, Mr. Del'u," I said, trying to contain my grin. "I'm not angry with you."

"I didn't know! I didn't know the effect it would have on humans!" he said, beginning to babble. "They didn't even tell me what had happened! No pictures or anything! I didn't know!"

I held up a large paw, bigger than his head. He shrunk almost half a foot in size.

"It's fine, Mr. Del'u. Accidents happen. Didn't they tell you we were fine?"

He shook his head. "They said two people were injured. I felt so bad. I tried to help as much as I could with the makeup of the containers and the formulas I used."

I nodded. "And you're out of prison already?"

He looked miserable. "They will not let me stay any longer, though I asked to be able to continue to help. My government is embarrassed of me. My search to find a way to reverse the changes will continue at home, however!"

He straightened up a bit as he said that last part, obviously wanting to correct what he viewed as a burden on his soul.

"Mr. Del'u," I said, smile returning, "I think you have misunderstood what you've begun. I'm not unhappy. I'm ecstatic. It took some getting used to, of course." Like my uniform. The shirt was still a size too small and squeezed my chest uncomfortably whenever I bent over. "But haven't you heard of all the people trying to duplicate what you accomplished?"

I thought back to just after John and I had transformed. Oh, the paperwork. Oh, the reports. Woe is me, drowning in a sea of tree pulp!

Okay, so it wasn't all that bad. There were innumerable tests, samples taken, isolation, all that. I learned the reason for my white coloring: leucism. Basically, reduced pigment levels as a freak result of the secondhand infection from John. At least they'd let us bunk together. I was single, so had no qualms about hooking up constantly, but John was married. He felt guilty about it until his wife, who'd seen pictures of him a few days after the accident, served him with divorce papers a month into our isolation. She hadn't visited once.

"Good thing we don't have kids," was all he'd said after signing the sheets of paper and passing them back through to the lawyer ogling us from the other side of the glass.

To take his mind off his ex, I'd turned him over the bed and pounded his rump and pussy. I heard a muffled "Oh my God!" from the lawyer on the other side of the glass before it turned opaque, blocking the view. I think I developed an exhibitionist streak after being cooped up so long with so many scientists and doctors coming through.

Del'u had been cooperative, in the meantime, and shared the strategies and formulas he'd used to hold the DNA in place in the suitcase. It was all a bit above my head, but basically it boiled down to a reaction caused by the Delrakaralaralakarakkan chemicals, the feline DNA, and human blood. Breathing it could cause issues at high enough doses. And, curiously enough, it only worked with feline DNA. Attempts to duplicate the process with other types of animals, like canines, had achieved nothing.

There'd been a hubbub about two months into our quarantine when one of the scientists developed a similar solution at home and turned herself and her husband into walking, talking snow leopards. They'd been tossed into the room next door, but unfortunately we weren't allowed to visit them personally. We could hear their constant, sexual groans through the walls, though, which John and I would giggle at like schoolchildren.

Three months later and we were free men. Well, free panthers. I resumed my old job, since what else was I supposed to do? John didn't like the publicity that came with our transformations, however, and took an early retirement. The government was very generous with both of us. We got a place together, of course. I discovered they did make bras big enough to contain us, which was fortunate. And I'd realized I truly had an exhibitionist streak when we took a walk through the shopping center for better clothes.

In the meantime, we'd been besieged by people eager to take the plunge, so to speak. Some just wanted to have sex, but others wanted the full experience. John and I could no longer turn other people - once the transformation completed, the infectivity of the formulas ended within hours. Besides the two leopard scientists, leaked information allowed a group of five amateurs to turn themselves into a pride of lions. Horny, hermaphroditic, well-hung lions, with libidos to match. John and I were visiting them next weekend at the containment facility where they'd been quarantined.

Del'u didn't seem to think accidentally turning us into humanoid animals was a good thing, so I tried my best to explain the cultural messages surrounding animal transformation that dominated Earth's culture, all the way back to ancient times. He appeared confused by most of it.

"I'm afraid I don't understand," he said. "Some humans would rather not be human?"

I shrugged. "Essentially."

The serronian shook his head again. "I don't think I will ever understand, but I am glad you are not unhappy."

I smiled and he flinched, so I toned down my grin. "To be honest, Mr. Del'u, there is quite the opportunity here. Those chemicals were non-native, besides the DNA. You should apply for patent protection on them the moment you land on your home planet. I have a feeling the market for them will be very popular here on Earth."

We talked a little longer. He promised to continue his work on discovering a way to reverse the process, but agreed that the financial opportunities of supplying the chemicals could fund the research. He didn't need much screening, as he'd been shipped here directly from his prison cell. The authorities had decided it wasn't worth holding him any longer, especially considering the attention he brought from home chemists wanting to duplicate his formulas. His home government was also pushing for a release. I made a mental note to contact the serronian ambassador and urge them to help him set up his new venture, rather than punish him for causing an interstellar incident. Better to release him and regulate the potential new market.

I watched him go, wondering at how much the world had changed. It was a very different place than even a hundred years ago. What was a few people turning themselves into anthropomorphic felines compared to the dozens of alien races, goods, and ships that passed through Earth every day?

I turned my attention back to the line, discreetly reaching under the counter and into my pants to adjust the bulge of my flaccid sheath. I stood up straight, smiling, as a human approached with a nervous look on his face. I sniffed the air, but he came up clean. I'd caught three people with contraband in the past week that way, something I'd forgotten to thank Del'u for. My bonus this year was going to be fantastic. I checked the guy out, digitally inked his passport, and waved my large white paw at him to get him moving through to final screening area behind me, where other officers would check their suitcases with additional scrutiny than before the Feline Smuggling Case, as it had come to be known in the press. I turned to the waiting lines of humans and aliens and smiled brightly.

"Next, please!"

The end.