A&B Chapter 5
Alex chose to stay at home on Saturday reading a book about the war between humans and dragons. Both were species of intelligence with powerful magic which caused a disaster to the world upon meeting. This particular history gradually raised doubts between furs. As their technologies were developed fast, more and more furs started to assail the beliefs as such so called history, while the supporters were traveling all the world to search for vestiges of magic or magical creatures. Anyway, for a fur who was neither a supporter of it nor willing to be against it, he enjoyed reading history like reading fantasy stories.
During his reading, James gave Alex a call, who apologized for his drunkenness last night and thanked him for bringing him home. The deer assured him it was fine and the night went absolutely wonderful for all the three furs.
*
On Sunday, the weather was so good that when Alex saw the cerulean sky, he suddenly missed his pencils and paper. He drove the pickup to a store and came back home with an easel, pencils and paper for sketches.
The deer was a bit talented at drawing sketches, but he didn't want to be a painter because he knew that required more patience than he had. He prefered to do it when he wanted, not to do it for a living under pressure.
He set the easel on his own room and decided to draw the scene over the windows. An hour later, the deer finished the sketch and was quite satisfied with the quality, which was rather good for an amatuer. However, the passion for sketches was still strong that he wanted to draw more with the pencil in paw.
What to draw?
He first came up with the idea to draw James, but the one whose image kept lingering in his mind was actually Blake. He quickly started drawing a ¾ view of the bear's head facing left and slightly down. He first sketched roughly the shape of Blake's head, paying more attention on his muzzle. Then he located his eyebrows, eyes and ears by drawing curvy lines. He then finished the rough sketch by adding the bear's nose, mouth and neck, and began to draw in details.
Half an hour later, Alex finished Blake's eyes, eyebrows, nose and mouth. He enjoyed drawing the bear's rounded eyes very much, which were glowing and full of spirit. He also drew the bear with a subtly smiling expression, with his muzzle slightly opened with his tongue and canines barely visible. However, he left the rest blank where he should draw fur, because he wasn't sure about the direction of his fur to lean to. Also, he couldn't remember the details of scar.
He stopped, not forcing himself to remember the look of Blake. He checked the work so far, which was good enough to be recognized as the particular bear and even with his spirited smile. The deer didn't intend to do this seriously, but now he wanted to do his best and presented it to Blake. Thus, he needed to observe the bear again.
He then called the bear and asked him to have a dinner on next Tuesday again, who quickly replied with a yes.
*
On the day they were having dinner together at a restaurant, Alex secretly examined the features of Blake's face, which was made much easier when the bear was busy eating his food. Alex noticed the scar was from the forehead above his right eye to his right cheek, luckily passing round his eye from the right. The scar seemed rather odd that Alex couldn't imagine how he got it. It was too tortuous and wide to be a cut by a sharp object such as a knife. The wideness of the scar indicated that it was more like to be cut by claws, but this still couldn't explain its shape. Alex didn't give it further thoughts since all he needed to do was to remember the look.
He watched carefully at the bear's facial fur, paying attention to its length and direction.
Blake noticed Alex's taciturnity at that night, and the deer averted his eyes at times. He was worried if he had done something wrong, but his concern was replaced by shyness as he discerned that Alex was staring at him secretly. No one had stared at him like this ever!
The two didn't talk much that night, because Alex was afraid to forget about what he just learned if he paid attention to talking, and Blake was just not a good conversation starter. However, they still managed a friendly and heartwarming goodbye, and they expressed the will to have dinner together on Friday night again.
Alex blinked at Blake when the bear was about to leave the car and said, "See you on this Friday, Blake. There'll be a small surprise for you."
*
Friday night sure came fast. Alex brought the sketch to his pickup and left it on backseat. He had finished the sketch on Tuesday when he spent an hour drawing Blake's fur on his face and neck, and changed a bit of his nose. He rolled it into a scroll carefully and tied it with a blue band.
When they got off the truck to go into the restaurant, Blake noticed the scroll in Alex's paw.
"What's that?"
"A small gift to you." Alex said honestly with a smile.
"Oh? What is it?" The bear's curiosity was aroused. He couldn't help but show a goofy happy expression. After all, he had only received gifts for a few times and all of them were from the same gorilla.
"How about we go into the restaurant, have our food ordered, and then you open it?" Seeing the bear so excited, Alex already felt what he did was definitely worth doing. Alex thought the bear was indeed acting like a 16 year old boy.
"Okay."
After they each ordered their food, Alex looked at the bear one more time to ensure himself that he had delineated the bear in the sketch properly. He was satisfied generally, though the bear in real life had longer fur on his cheeks than what he had drawn. Then he put the scroll on the table and said softly, "Open it."
Blake untied it and unrolled it. He immediately craned his neck to look at the sketch in disbelief. The drawing was so vivid! He almost stuttered when saying, "Thi... this is amazing! Thank you Alex! It is the best gift I ever had!"
"Haha. I'm glad you like it."
"I like it a lot!" Blake was still staring at his own profile, but stopped because not wanting to appeared narcissistic to stare at his own portrait for too long. He rolled it back carefully and put it on the seat beside him.
One thing Blake noticed and found it meaningful was that, due to its being a ¾ view of him turning his head to the left (from viewer's point of view), it depicted mostly his unharmed left face, while it de-emphasized the scar on his right face. It wasn't an affectedly prettified drawing, since his scar was still drawn. Instead it was drawn to focused on his good side.
Did that mean that was what the deer saw in him, the good side?
Also, unlike other gifts he had received from James, this drawing wasn't something could be bought, but something he put a lot of effort and care into. It was invaluable.
Blake swallowed once. He was touched by the gift more than Alex had thought. For Alex, it was only a small gift that he had worked on for a few hours. However, for Blake, it was a gift meaning that he was liked by someone.
The bear was staring at the table, lost in his own thoughts.
Alex waved his paw at the bear in a daze, and said, "Hello?"
"Uhh... Sorry. I was just thinking. I really like the sketch a lot. Thank you again."
"You're welcome. How were your past few days? Anything happened?"
"They were okay. I won't be in town from next Monday to Wednesday. I'll go on an errand for the company."
"What's that errand about?" asked Blake.
"It's a major seminar hosted in the city. I'll be just listening to and taking note of the latest research findings."
"Wow. That sounds complicated."
"Yeah. I guess I won't understand most of them, and I highly doubt if they understand what they are going to say themselves."
"Hehe, I see. Still, your job sounds more interesting than mine." said Blake.
"I can imagine. What job do you want the most?"
"Umm... I guess I want to be a driver." The bear answered honestly.
"Why? You like driving?"
The bear nodded, saying, "I like it so far, and I prefer driving bigger vehicles. It feels exciting when I know I can make such a big thing move."
"Haha, I know the feeling. So, you want to be a truck driver?"
"Exactly!"
"I don't know about their standard of recruitment for truck drivers. They must be experienced though. If you want it, you can practice with my truck whenever you want."
"Thanks." The bear rubbed the back of his head with his paw, saying, "I... owe you a lot."
"It's fine. I enjoy your accompanying."
"Hehe, I enjoy yours too. When did you start learning how to drive?"
...
*
They shared some of their past with each other at the dinner. Alex learned that, just as what he had expected, the bear hadn't received proper education in the orphanage. Blake could read, but he wasn't very good at writing since there weren't teachers willing to guide them do so and check their work. Also, Blake's knowledges about math, science, history and other subjects were limited. Alex told him he could teach the bear if he was interested in any subject, but the Blake said honestly that he didn't care about such study.
Out of curiosity, Alex also asked the bear if there was sexual education for the orphans. Blake sheepishly told him there was merely one course, where the teacher gave them a book material for passing between the kids to read, and no talk was allowed. Blake only had a few glances of the pictures of male and female's genitals of different species before another boy seized the book from him. Since then, the boys in group started discussing about it secretly. However, Blake wasn't popular at all so no one would like to talk with him about that, or anything really.
"You poor bear. Well, I'm not sure if I'm the most suitable one, but if you are curious you can talk with me about that."
"O... okay. Thanks." Blake said with a huge blush.
*
They left the restaurant at 9:40 pm. Alex felt the weather was nice with a breeze gently drifting over his fur. He saw the bear beside him walked slowly with his eyes staring at the sky, clearly having something on his mind but didn't say it.
"What's on your mind?" asked Alex softly.
"No...nothing."
The deer could only guess, "You want to drive?"
"Uh... No, thanks. It's quite dark. It's better if I practice in the daytime."
"Okay." So, that was not what was on the bear's mind. Alex thought. He decided to forget about it, and begin drive to Blake's house.
When they arrived, Blake got off the small truck with the painting in his paw, hesitating for another time to say something but dismissed it at last. He simply said goodbye and thanks for the night and the great gift, before moving his large body into his house.
Alex drove home with a delighted mood. It seemed that he really had made the bear happy this time.
However, right before he opened the door of his house, he heard the telephone ringing, so he quickly swung it open and ran to pick up the phone to see who called him at this later.
"Alex..."
It turned out to be the bear just separated from him 15 minutes ago.
"Yeah, Blake?"
"Do you want to go to Kul mountain with me now?"
Alex said in surprise, "Now?"
"Yeah. You gave me such a amazing gift, and I want to return it you by bringing you to the most wonderful place I found in the mountain."
"Oh... Okay then. So, what should I do now?" Alex agreed without hesitating. He didn't want to turn down the bear.
"Pick me up again at my house, please?"
"Sure. See you later."
Alex left the house he just arrived at. He drove back to Blake's house, finding the bear waiting for him holding a blanket. Alex let the bear get into the car and put the blanket on the backseat.
The bear seemed exhilarated.
"I'm not complaining, but isn't it a bit too late for a hiking? It's going to be very dark in the woods I guess." Alex asked.
"It'd be the most beautiful at night, and today the moon is full and bright without clouds, so it will be rather bright in the mountains." Blake answered, not able to suppress his excitement.
"Okay. What's the scene you're going to bring me to?"
"I'm not telling you now. You will see and I assure you that you'll love it."
"Haha. I trust you. I've learned my lesson from last time that I should always listen to you when it is about the mountains." Alex said playfully as the memories of being wet in the mountain came to him.
"This time you will only enjoy it." When talked about the mountain, the bear was always so confident.
"Great. What's it you got on the backseat?"
"It's a blanket. We are going to sleep on it tonight."
This surprised the deer, who didn't expect they would spend the whole night in the mountains. "But even though it is summer now, it's still going to be too chilly to sleep there at night, right?"
"I'm warm. You can cuddle with me, if you don't mind." Blake said sheepishly and softly which was barely audible. He felt so shy and nervous that he kept facing straight at the road, not daring to see the reaction of the deer friend beside him.
Alex was mentally stunned at first, but he still needed to drive so he remained calm, keeping his attention on the road. He replied without thinking through, "Yeah, that would be nice."
There were a terribly long silence between the two furs. Alex staring at the road, tried not to imagine how good it would feel to cuddle with the black bear, because it was dangerous to divert his attention to something arousing. On the other paw, the bear remained silent because he sure sensed the discomfort brought by his suggestion.
"I... I was just saying. You don't have to say yes if you dislike it." Finally, the bear opened his muzzle again referring the cuddling issue.
Alex heard the nervousness of it. He soon felt sympathetic to the bear, who rarely got physical contact with other furs. He reassured the bear, "We cuddle as you want."
Blake couldn't believe what he just heard, that he wanted asked one more time but he was afraid it would annoy the deer. Anyway, what he heard made him greatly delighted.
*
Then arrived at the foot of the mountains with Blake's guidance. The forest was indeed quite clear for a night, where moonlight cast down and there were no clouds.
Blake holding the blanket, leading the way in fast paces and at times looked back to ensure the deer wasn't having trouble catching up with him. He reminded himself that Alex was very endurable which was shown last time they went here, so he then moved even faster. The young and robust ursine was eager to show his deer friend the best scene he had discovered. But at the same time, he was also eager the following cuddle Alex had promised. Now the latter one seemed even more appealing for the bear to look forward to.
Little did the bear know, Alex was thinking exactly the same thing. Alex liked Blake in different ways. He liked to talk and take care of Blake as a big brother, but he also liked him for the bear being cute and attractive.
Despite the lust, Alex couldn't ask the 16-year-old bear to do anything. The bear was too young, too shy to say no, especially to him! Alex was aware how lonely the bear had been clinging on him recently. Since Blake wouldn't say no even if he disliked it, Alex could do anything to the bear but it would eventually hurt both of them.
He didn't allow himself taking advantage of the young bear, and he sure didn't want to hurt Blake everything . Hence, he decided anything would happen between the two must be initiated by the bear.
*
After an hour of fast hiking in an extremely tortuous route that made Alex lost in direction, the two finally were close to the spot.
Alex heard something! He called Blake to stop and listened to it carefully in the silent night of the forest.
"It's water, flowing water!" The deer claimed.
"Yeah, hehe. You have better hearing than me. It is the water that I want to bring you to."
They followed the sound of flowing water, which was growing louder as they approached. Soon the deer realized it wasn't only the sound of flowing water, but also water splashing.
Minutes later, a small sized waterfall came into the deer's sight. Water was flowing down from the 4 meters height difference, splashing on the stones at the bottom that had been scoured to be rounded and slippery.
Alex and Blake were at the downstream, where the water expanded into a lake. The full moon was just hanging above them, lighting up the whole night scene with silver moonlight. The stars were abundant in this cloudless night, which was a first time for the deer who had grown up in a city and seen so many of them.
"This is spectacular." Alex exclaimed. His eyes lost focus because he was greedily trying to take the whole moonlit picture in his eyes, including the waterfall, lake, trees and the vast sky.
"Yeah. You... you like it?"
"Yes I like it. I love this! Thank you Blake." Alex expressed in exhilaration.
The two furs walked along the lake to the waterfall. Blake put the blanket on the ground and said, "We will sleep here, okay?"
"Sure."
Alex watched Blake unfold the blanket on a small step that could support their heads like a pillow. He also found the blanket was not wide.
"Are we going to sleep now?" asked the deer.
"I'm too energetic and excited to sleep now. How about we swim for a while?"
"That's absolutely wonderful! Wait! There aren't any wild animals in the water, right?" Alex asked half jokingly.
"Hehe, no, I assure you. But there will be a deer and bear right away."
Blake turned his back to the deer, walking to the edge of the water and started to strip himself off. He put his clothes in a pile on the earth, and walked into the lake, submerging himself gradually into the water.
It happened so fast and Alex found himself staring at the bear's nude back and bum, which was a scene as great as the natural scene there. He soon shook it off and made his mind clear that he shouldn't be luring at the kid like that.
He followed the bear and took of his clothes, dropping them off beside Blake's. As his hooves stepped into the cool water, Alex shuddered and moaned playfully.
"Come on quickly. It's not that cold." The bear said, with his whole body into the water except his head.
Stepping slowly in further Alex shuddered again, saying, "It IS cold."
Alex yelped between laughs and hugged himself as Blake suddenly splashed water to his upper body, "Stop! Stop!"
But Blake didn't stop, he only laughed loudly.
Alex plunged into the water, deciding to teach the bear a lesson, but only finding the bear was already swimming away from him. The deer stopped himself, floating in the mid of the lake to find his company who must be hidden in the water. He heard noise from his back, so he turned back quickly, surprised to see water flying to him.
They played the water fight for quite a moment, sound of splashes, laughs, and yelps were echoing in the night.
Alex had good physical stamina, but he wasn't good at swimming. After they had been playing like this for half an hour, Alex found himself panting hard with his heart pumping fast. He couldn't swim as fast as before, not to mention catch up the dexterous bear.
He kept himself steadily floating in the water, catching his own breath and energy back. The bear splashed water to the deer again, but Alex didn't counter back. The deer merely wiped the water off his head.
Blake submerged himself completely into the water, disappearing from the deer's sight.
Alex felt the water flowing at the bottom level but he couldn't see the bear in the water. He called, "Blake? What's on your mind you naughty bear?"
Then much to Alex's surprise, he felt the bear emerging from the water put his arms around Alex from his back. It was a gentle hug, wet and cold, but when his back was pulled further into the bear's torso, it was solid and hot.
Alex said in a soft tone, "I thought you meant we cuddle when we sleep."
"Yeah. Sorry, hehe." Blake released Alex, saying, "Let's swim to the waterfall, okay?"
"Sure."
"Think we can make a competition?"
"Yeah."
They began swimming to the waterfall as fast as they could. Alex knew he would lose to the bear, but he didn't mind.
In fact, they reached to the waterfall at the same time because Blake was waiting for Alex and then they reached there together, forgetting about the competition.
The waterfall looked much bigger and more vivacious from right below it. The water was very shallow there so both furs could stand on the rock. Alex was curious to see what was behind the curtain of water, but if he walked through it he must close his eyes.
"Let's get there from this side." Blake suggested, leading the deer to the left side of the waterfall.
They climbed out from the water, and Blake warned that the stone could be very slippery. The bear chose to walk behind the deer so he could catch the deer if he slipped. They carefully approached the waterfall. Alex found their wasn't much room behind it.
"What does it feel like if we stand in the fall?" Alex asked loudly to let the bear hear from the noisy background.
"We can have a try."
Blake caught Alex's paw, holding it and the two slowly walked into the water. Thanks to the stones protruding from the precipice cushioning the impact of the water, they walked into the waterfall without any danger or trouble.
It was still kind of scary to stand in the literally pouring water with his eyes closed tight. Alex managed to take breath through his agaped muzzle while keeping it pointing down.
When his breaths became even, he uttered a long "ahhhhh" but only made a funny sound of talking in water.
"Is it fun?" Blake shouted at him, who clutched Alex's paw in his for once.
"Yeahhhhhhhhhhh."
"Goooooooooood."
"Woooooooooooo."
They exchanged some stupid long vocal sounds. A moment later, they both found a it bit exhausting to stand under the waterfall, so they broke their paw holding and cautiously stepped down, walking away from the waterfall.
They opened their eyes to see each other's smiling faces.
"Do you enjoy it here?" Blake asked.
"I love this place! This is the best place in the world. Thanks for showing it to me!"
"You're welcome. I'm really thankful you came here with me, Alex."
"Anytime, Blake."
"Hehe."
They both were having a great time, and both were very tired from the hiking and swimming.
"I'm a bit tired now." Alex said.
"Me too."
"Should we get out from the lake and go to sleep?"
"Yeah. Let's swim back to the edge."
They did so, and Alex found Blake swimming very slowly. When walking away from the water, he turned back and found the bear was still in it.
"Alex... I still want to swim for a while. Is that okay?"
"Yeah."
"Good. You can get to sleep first. I'll join you later. And then... we can cuddle." The bear mentioned cuddle another time to remind the deer what he had promised.
"Yeah, sure."
With that, Blake quickly swam away to the center of the lake.
Alex shook wildly to make himself as dry as possible. Then he finally realized the problem that they didn't bring a towel. The deer decided to use his clothes to clean himself.
Unlike humans, furs usually didn't put on any clothes immediately after a shower because of their wet fur. So being naked, Alex went to lay down on the blanket which turned out to be quite worn out. Alex assumed it was one of the donated things to Blake back in the orphanage. Even though after the life in orphanage he got a job, the bear still lived in frugality , not buying new things unless necessary.
Alex laid on the blanket, listened to the sound of the bear swimming in the water.
The deer had a wonderful night, probably one of his best. The waterfall was spectacular, the night magnificent, the night scene being spectacular being wonderful and even romantic that caused many ifs in Alex's mind.
If Alex could find his mate here; if he could kiss the one who brought him to here; if they could slowly explore and pleasure each other's body under the moon; if they could hold each other, looking into the other's eyes and speaking in the language of love, he would be the happiest deer in the world.
But all the ifs were imagined. So far Alex had no idea whether Blake prefered males or females. Blake himself even didn't know! The bear had no one to talk with about that subject.
Alex made his mind follow his previous decision that he wouldn't initiate anything between him and the bear. He would have to be wait, hoping and watching Blake's actions and attitudes. Alex hence was laying on the blanket with his back to the bear, pretending to be asleep in the nude like a prey presenting himself openly and welcomingly.
Later, the bear came out from the lake and Alex heard him wipe himself. Heart rate soaring up, Alex felt the bear coming closer and joining him on the blanket.
A large, wet yet warm paw slided on his fur from his waist to his stomach, that made Alex's body tense up with his deer dick emerging itself quickly with a few throbs. Then the whole frontal body of Blake pressed against Alex's back, as well as Blake's pelvis against Alex's bottom.
It made the deer aroused but then quickly confused in doubts. He couldn't feel the desire from Blake; he couldn't feel anything hard against his bum. Either the bear had a very tiny cock, or he didn't get aroused at all.
Alex moved his butts as subtly as possible, and he was sure he felt the bulge of the bear that was completely soft. Also, Blake was actually in his underwears.
It was very cruel to Alex who felt being teased like this, who had been touched and held but wanted no more. However, he could understand the bear. The orphan must be craving for physical contact with any fur. Alex appreciated being the one consoling the lonely bear, or at least he tried to tell himself so.
"Not complaining, it's going to be hard for me to sleep if your bushy tail kept flicking like this." Blake said jokingly.
When Alex's mind was racing, his short cervine tail tended to do this subconsciously. He quickly suppressed its movement, and replied simply, "Uh-huh."
"Hehe, I said I wasn't complaining." Blake chuckled and moved his paw to the middle of Alex's fuzzy chest.
This made Alex aroused more, but he actually felt relieved greatly because he didn't have to be worried about his dick accidentally touched the bear's paw with a throb.
When Alex had been "tortured' like this for a few minutes, he heard the bear's breaths becoming steady and slow, the large paw on his chest hanging freely. Alex turned slowly to look at the bear, finding him asleep for real.
He stared at the bear's moonlit face that was innocent and quiet. Alex felt sorry for the lonely bear who had a warm heart but was so unlucky to grow up in an orphanage, without families or friends.
All he needs is a hug. Alex said inwardly with a smile and a hint of sorrow. He turned himself slowly to face the sleeping bear and hugged him gently.
He would do anything to help Blake. He could put his own desire aside for Blake. He could give his love to Blake, as a big brother.
Later the deer fell asleep as well.
*
The next morning was silent for both the buck and the bear. In fact it was too silent. They merely exchanged good mornings to each other and then folded the blanket, ready to go back to the pickup and leave the mountains.
The scene in the morning was utterly different from it in the night. It was lacking of the mysterious dimness and sereneness. Daylight made this lake common and unimpressive, so they didn't stay.
Alex didn't sleep well due to blood surging into his dick, despite how hard he tried to suppress it. But eventually the tiredness beat him and he fell asleep as his mind blurred. Hence on the road back to the foot of the mountains, the buck was exhausted due to the lack of sleep.
Blake, on the other paw, was also strangely silent since this morning. He had something he wanted desperately to say, but he was so fearful of losing Alex as a friend. When he woke up in morning seeing the naked deer beside him asleep, he almost failed to resist himself. He wanted to caress his body in a way that was not innocent but lewd and could be considered very rude.
They took a couple hours to get back to the pickup. Alex asked Blake if he wanted to drive, and then he saw the hesitance in Blake's eyes so he decided to drive himself.
They didn't talk on the road back until they approached their town when Blake couldn't hold it anymore. The bear took the courage to speak up, "I hope you don't hate me."
Taken aback, Alex was truly surprised, asking, "No, I don't! Where does that come from?"
"Not every male fur appreciates being cuddled by another male. They might feel weird and uncomfortable from that. That is what James told me." Blake said trying to be calm.
"Well... It's true, but I'm okay with it. Why did James tell you something like that?"
Blake thought about it for a while, before told Alex his story, "About 6 years ago, there was a fellow deer boy in the orphanage whom I liked very much. I used to live in a dorm room with 11 other cubs. One night when I couldn't get to sleep, I climbed onto that deer's bed and hugged him from behind. He didn't protest at first so I continued doing it for more nights, until one day he told the teacher in front of the other cubs that I had been bullying him, and every other fur laughed at us about this..." Blake said with his eyes fixed on his leg.
Alex kept driving steadily while he listened to the bear carefully. He had the feeling that the story Blake was telling to him was kind of important to him and had been hidden deep inside of the bear.
Blake continued, "After that I was moved out from the big room to a small dim room."
Alex gasped, "Oh dear! Is that the reason why you had been isolated by others?" Then he winced as he realized the cruelness of the question.
"Umm... no. That didn't make much difference to my life except I slept without a roommate after that."
Alex felt relieved for a completely selfish reason. He surely didn't want the town against such things. He apologized, "I see. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked it. It's not cool. It just slipped from my lips."
"It's fine. It didn't offend me."
"Still, I'm sorry. What happened after you were moved to a single room?"
Blake answered, "I was greatly confused and kind of depressed. It only went worse when I tried to apologize and talk to the buck, but he didn't talk to me anymore."
"I think it was not cool what that deer friend had done. First, if he didn't like it, he should've told you, not to the teachers in front of every fur. Also he should've taken your apology." Alex said honestly.
"It wasn't his fault in fact because he was really hurt. The children started to call us names after we slept together for a couple nights. They even called him names in class in the presence of the teacher. Finally he couldn't put up with it any longer. He bursted into tears and told the teacher."
"If I may ask, what did they call you two?"
"You certainly can. They called me gay bear, and called him something like uhh... bitch, Blake's bitch."
"Awwwwwww..." Alex winced and suddenly felt strong feelings of sympathy toward the deer orphan whom he just blamed.
Blake continued, "Luckily for me, at that time James was at the orphanage to help. When he heard what happened on that class, he talked to me a lot and let me know about manners regarding this. He told me about privacy, and every furs having their comfort zone. He also told me the meaning of being gay."
Alex felt a lump in his throat as he heard the word 'gay' for the second time. He swallowed but said nothing. There were just too much information in the bear's story, the driving deer was now almost in a haze. He forced himself to concentrate on the road while he tried to remember Blake's words.
After a moment of silence, Blake asked, "You? Do you hate me for cuddling with you?"
Alex swallowed for another time. The air in the truck was tight, and the deer wasn't exactly thinking thoroughly when he replied, "No, Blake. I'm gay... and I enjoyed cuddling with you."
"I'm gay too."
They both were in another silence. Blake's mind was elated incredibly, he couldn't believe what he had just heard. Alex was gay? It was like a dream about to come true. Alex was the fur Blake found the most attractive, and the deer was being really nice to him. He was already greatly gratified to have Alex as a friend. What if they could be more than friends?
On the other paw, Alex was confused. He felt like being toyed and played by the world. He couldn't forget last night when he was in desperate desire with Blake holding him went to sleep. The deer smiled wryly, saying, "What did you learn from James about gay furs?"
"Male furs who prefer male furs?"
They arrived Blake's house when he asked this. Alex pulled off the road and killed the engine.
"Prefer to do what?" asked Alex in a tone with a bit annoyment and pique.
Alex's slightly aggressive reaction was sure not the reaction Blake expected. The bear was even scared a little and began stammering, "Prefer to do everything? Sor... sorry, I know nothing."
Alex let out a long and sad sigh and told him gravely, "Blake, you are not gay."
"I am." Blake protested in confusion.
"No, you aren't. You don't even know what the meaning of being gay."
"I know! And I always like boys!" Blake claimed forcelessly.
"You've hardly talked to girls, have you?"
"No."
"Then you are probably just too shy and feared to approach them." Alex said with a sad face.
"But... every child in the orphanage knew I'm gay."
"Liking to cuddle with a boy doesn't make you a gay fur, Blake. You were just too young and you still are. Trust me it's easy for a fur your age to be confused about their preference. Besides, you have limited knowledge about sex." Alex said, though in truth, the only reason Alex thought the bear was not gay was that he didn't get aroused when they cuddled.
"But..." Blake lost his words, feeling confused indeed .
Alex embraced Blake and stroked his back for a couple times. He broke the hug and said, "I know you've been quite lonely, Blake. You want to hug or cuddle with me, which is fine. I'll be there for you at anytime."
"..." The bear was still finding it hard to find his words.
"Last night... was wonderful. Thank you very much for taking me to that beautiful waterfall." Alex said in a kind of flat tone.
The air in the truck was highly tense. Blake knew Alex only meant to be polite by saying that, and he knew it was only polite for him to leave the truck now. He said goodbye to Alex, and got off the truck.
The bear watched the truck driving away. He didn't go into the house, but sat on the stairs of it, deeply distracted for the second time in his life. He felt heartbroken, but he couldn't find anything that went. Indeed, everything went fluently with him and Alex, right? They were still friends, weren't they? Then why was he feeling so sad?
He was so happy when he knew Alex was gay, and he was even starting to think of the deer kissing him. But now, it was gone.
On the other paw, Alex wasn't having a good time either. He just took too much information from the bear's story. When he got back home, sinking into the sofa and had the time to think over, he gasped as he saw the whole picture of the events.
Blake, gay, the other deer in the orphanage, James, and his own coming out to James... It became clear that James wanted him and the bear to know each other because he wanted Blake to meet with a gay fur, who would help him to know about gay life.
*
When Blake went to his bedroom and locked himself there, he couldn't do anything except fall into his thoughts of Alex. The deer's firm attitude of him not being gay was strange enough to make the bear think pessimistically. Could it be possible that Blake was really not gay? Could it be possible that Alex held it so strong that he wasn't gay, because... because it was only an excuse? Because Alex didn't like him, that he thought he was ugly and pathetic just like every other fur in the town did?
The assumption almost made Blake feel suffocated. He felt a twinge of pain in his chest, so terrible that he felt hopeless. He fell on his bed in a mood of melancholy, suppressing the sore feeling in his nose in great efforts. However, when he turned his head and saw the scroll on the nightstand, he felt greatly relieved as hope just came back. He opened the scroll of his own portrait done by the deer. It was a bear definitely not bad-looking which he blushed to realize.
He was then confused again.