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First Blood

Chapter 4

Ettoras stood in the breeze as the sun sank away in a watery soup of pinks and oranges. The first stars were winking overhead, and the soft roar of the waterfall was soothing. The atmosphere would have been very romantic if he had any romantic feelings for Kayya. But she was crying and disheveled. And he felt nothing but brotherly love pouring from his heart. He helped her to her feet and held her elbows and peered sadly into her face, frowning with concern as the cool, wet breeze lifted his mane against his cheek. She sniffled quietly and looked at him helplessly with her large dark eyes, and her small paws awkwardly touched his chest. It was a gentle, imploring touch, and it felt so sisterly and uncertain, Ettoras looked at her and realized they were children still. They had no business getting married.

Kayya smiled at Ettoras through her tears as she listened to his thoughts. Most foxes could hear some scarce surface thoughts, but only the very oldest could really delve into the mind. Kayya's eyes softened as she whispered, "Really? You love me like a sister?"

"Yes," Ettoras said softly. "I love you. And . . ." His frown deepened. "It's weird being told I have to marry you. I can't marry you. You're my best friend!"

Kayya laughed sadly. "But that's the idea, goof! My mom says you're supposed to find your best friend ever. Then you marry them and spend your life with them." She smiled at him and closed her fingers on the toned muscles of his arms.

He was still holding her elbows and cocked a skeptical brow. "Yeah, Kayya. But shouldn't there be some sexual feelings involved too? I mean . . . it would make having cubs easier." He moaned. "Oh gods. They expect us to have cubs."

Kayya cast her eyes down. "I trust you more than anyone, Ettoras," she whispered. "I love you too, even if I'm not in love with you." She looked at him again as the realization hit her, and her pretty eyes went round. "Did you say they expect us to have cubs? I thought I was going to die if you touched me!"

Ettoras laughed softly and took her paw. "My mother meant for you to marry me, not be a sacrifice. Your parents misunderstood."

"What?"

They left the stream, strolling paw-in-paw through the trees. The forest was called _Ky-men_and stood tall with thin, young trees. Small fireflies danced through the falling darkness, lighting their way, setting the curled leaves of bushes aglow. Ettoras smiled at Kayya and wrapped his arm around her. She hugged him tight and braced herself, her cheek crushing against his shoulder as his wings spread wide. He lifted into the air, and their manes flapped with the beat of his wings. He tried to ignore the sight of her swollen breasts rising from the deep neckline of her gown, but all the blood was rushing below his waist.

"I don't understand," Kayya said as they soared through the branches of a great tree.

Higher and higher they flew, passing flowers, moss, and draping vines in a blur. The tree was theirs, a gargantuan beast Azrian had grown to an immense size and height with her magic. There were times when Azrian came down from the sky and walked S'pru, and because her very presence endangered the foxes, they were always tasked with locking themselves in their homes. Azrian would then walk, and where she walked, new life would spring. When Ettoras was just a boy, she descended to earth to grow the great tree for him. Ettoras and Kayya had been playing in it ever since. They called it Tai Lin, which in the language of the foxes meant Sun Tree. For the tree grew apples that were yellow and gold.

Ettoras found a massive branch and gently sat Kayya on it. Her legs swung and her gown fluttered in the breeze as she adjusted her mane. He settled beside her and folded his wings.

"How can I marry a god?" Kayya said in wonder. "Once your seed fills me, it will kill me!"

"No," Ettoras muttered to his lap. "I'm not immortal, Kay."

Kayya looked at him in amazement.

"I'm not," he said to her unspoken disbelief. He closed his eyes and bowed his head. "I am not a god."

Kayya touched his shoulder and rubbed it in sympathy. "Well, that's a relief, isn't it? Think of all the girls you can boink now," she joked.

Ettoras frowned. "This is serious, Kay."

Kayya sighed and dropped her paw from his shoulder. "Look, Ettoras. You can mope about it, or you can make the best of it."

Ettoras glanced at her sheepishly. "Well . . . what about you? Do you even want this? You always said you didn't want to marry. You swore you wouldn't."

"I know," Kayya said to her lap. "But it's either marry you or marry some bigger goof my parents pick out. Things could be worse."

"Gee, thanks," Ettoras said sarcastically and Kayya elbowed him.

They laughed.

"I mean it," Kayya said seriously and her voice softened as she took his paw and whispered, "I couldn't ask for a better husband. There's no one I trust more."

Ettoras smiled at her, but he looked away again. "I know you don't feel . . . anything for males. That day at the beach . . . I know it was awkward for you."

"My parents don't under_stand_," Kayya said in frustration. "They still think I let you touch me that day. I tried to tell them I don't even like . . ." She halted sheepishly.

"Boys," Ettoras finished for her.

Kayya smiled at him crookedly. "But you're kinda cute, right?" she said and playfully tickled his ear. "If there was a girl version of you, I'd be drooling."

Ettoras laughed softly. "And if I was a girl, I'd be marrying your brother about now."

"You'd have my condolences," Kayya said dryly.

Kayya was the oldest of three cubs. Her younger brother was the exact opposite of her: he was solemn and cold and took his worship of Azrian and Ettoras serious to a fault. If Ettoras commanded it, Kayya's brother might have jumped off a cliff in silent obedience. His name was Karabo, and Kayya was fond of teasing him about his almost zealous worship of Ettoras.

Kayya's sister, meanwhile, was two years younger than Kayya. Her name was Isii and she had a crush on Ettoras that always left her blushing and stammering. Ettoras couldn't remember a time when she had ever formed a complete sentence in his presence. She was a white fox with red gloves and socks and a long red mane that spilled in curls down her back. She was beautiful, but Ettoras looked at her and saw only a child. She was a stammering kid sister to him, and the fact was painfully obvious to her as she watched him from a distance with sad eyes.

As the eldest daughter of the family, it was Kayya's duty to give herself to Ettoras for his pleasure, though Ettoras was fully aware his mother would have chosen Isii if she thought him in love with her instead.

"And what about you?" Kayya whispered. "Do you . . . like me?"

Ettoras glanced at her big breasts pressing through her provocative gown and swallowed hard. Did she really need to ask that? "You remember what happened last year. When you got . . . wet at the beach - shut up!" he cried when she snorted with laughter. But he laughed too.

"Wet at the beach," giggled Kayya. "Well, not for you, big boy."

"You saw what happened to me. Of course I like you. Don't be an idiot."

Kayya dropped her head on his shoulder. She was still holding his paw and her arm was wound in his. She shrugged half-heartedly. "Well, I dunno how it works. Maybe you like both. Or maybe you only got excited because an eel touched you under the water."

"Very funny."

"Do you like both?"

Ettoras blinked. "I dunno," he realized. "I like how you look, though. You're . . . pretty," he said sheepishly and didn't meet her eye.

"Really?" Kayya whispered happily.

Ettoras scowled. "I never met a girl who didn't know she was pretty, Kay. Knock it off."

Kayya dropped her eyes to her lap, and Ettoras realized she really didn't know. He squeezed her paw apologetically and whispered, "You're pretty, Kayya. I'll tell you every day if you need to hear it."

Kayya smiled at him warmly and dropped her head on his shoulder again. They sat in content silence for a time, listening to the crickets chirrup and the night birds sing.

"We can have sex," Kayya whispered after a while, "if you want to."

Ettoras frowned. "No, we don't have to. I know you don't like boys. It doesn't seem fair to make you."

"You aren't making me. It's my choice, you goof. It's . . . my gift to you.

Ettoras scowled. "Don't talk like that. Females aren't prizes or presents. And I'm not your god, remember?"

"But I want to give myself --"

"Why!"

"For being such a good friend. For always protecting me from the other boys," Kayya whispered warmly and squeezed his fingers. "For always being there when I needed someone's arms to cry in . . . For loving me and being my brother. For letting me beat you up."

Ettoras laughed softly. "Kayya . . . we shouldn't. It doesn't seem right."

"And it doesn't seem right that you should remain a virgin the rest of your life. Do you really want to be alone? Or do you want me to give you children? I could give you so many cubs. And I want children too, Ettoras. Did you ever think of that?"

Ettoras blinked. No. He'd never thought of that.

"Your mother must have thought of it. Or why did she choose me?"

"Because she thought I was in love with you," Ettoras said. "But that doesn't mean . . . we don't have to do anything tonight."

"Let's try," Kayya whispered.

Ettoras frowned and touched her lip. "Mother and Nerayn told me that . . ." He shook his head slowly. "I don't want to hurt you, Kay."

Kayya laughed sadly, and he swallowed hard when she laid back on the thick width of the tree branch. She nervously unfastened the strap of her dress and let it fall, revealing her large, full breasts. They were white, as a white stripe cut from her chin and down her belly, and the pink nipples were jutting from the cold breeze. She breathed a shuddering breath and they lifted and fell, supple and full, and waiting for his paws.

"You can't protect me from everything, Ettoras," Kayya whispered and smiled.

Ettoras felt it coming on strong. He could see she was nervous. Every breath trembled through her as she lay there, young and beautiful, with her legs spread under her gown. Ettoras felt the nerves pumping through him as well, then something else pumped up, and he saw Kayya's pretty eyes flutter wide. He leaned close and looked into her eyes, and the pleasure tingled through him when her small paw found his shaft and squeezed it uncertainly through the fabric of his robes. He had never been touched before. And she had never touched a penis before. She was in awe of the sheer width of him as her startled paw explored down to his heavy sack. She suddenly seemed so small as he leaned over her. He could have folded her up in any position.

"E-Ettoras . . . oh," she whispered breathlessly as his lips gently closed on her nipple. He licked it carefully and paused to suck, suckling so deeply that his face sank in her softness. She curled her fingers in his mane and arched back against the pleasure. Her breathless cries encouraged him. His fingers found her soft, warm sex and caressed. He slipped a finger inside and almost halted to feel how tight she was. He could barely get his _pinky_in. He had to wonder if she was unusually tight or he simply had really big paws.

Her sweet smell, her softness excited him, and he felt himself getting harder still as he buried frantic kisses in her breasts. His kisses trailed down her belly, pausing only when he tugged her robes down. The robe went flying away on the wind as he found her sex and kissed it. Her soft thighs stood either side his head, and he paused only a moment to lick them before plunging his face. She twisted, thrusting her breasts to the sky with a weak cry. He ate her slowly and ravenously, slapping his hot tongue against the soft lips of her sex. When he glanced up, she was breathless and weak, her white mane tumbling in one eye. Her tail draped lifeless over the tree branch, twitching when his tongue gave a caress so deep, her toes curled.

She was limp and weak when he pulled back to look at her, tracing his soft, hungry eyes over the curves of her naked body. Her big breasts were still riding with her gasps, and she ran her paw over one and down to her sex, smiling to herself from the pleasure. He was surprised when she sat up and pushed his robes back from his erection. She stared it, and he waited, not knowing what she was going to do.

"I don't have to put it in," he whispered. "I like licking you --"

"Shut up, Ettoras," she said breathlessly and yanked him close and kissed him.

He trembled when her small paws fumbled to pull his robe over his head, and then he was naked as well, and she was wrapped in the strength of his arms, and her little paws were smoothing up and down the tight muscles of his back, as if in amazement. He loved the feel of her soft breasts crushed to his chest and kissed her fervently, sliding his gentle tongue against her tongue, moaning as he tasted her. She brushed her clit against his erection, silently urging him.

"Kayya . . . are you sure?" he whispered.

She wrapped her arms around his neck, buried her face as if to hide, and nodded against him.

Ettoras swallowed hard. He closed his big paws on her hips and lifted them . . . and slowly brought her down on his shaft. But he was so large, the soft head of his penis couldn't get in. She tensed and whimpered, and he looked at her unhappily.

"D-Do it, Ettoras," she whispered and gave him a trembling kiss on the lips. She started to pull her mouth away, but he caught her lips to his and thrust his tongue in her mouth as he brought her down on him, sudden and hard, right to the base of his shaft. She sobbed. But it was the only way to break the tight hymen that had been barring him. He felt her hymen crumble against the strength of his hungry phallus, and as his massive shaft slid thick between the tight lips of her sex, he felt a sudden hot moisture and caught it on his fingers. He looked at his fingers and frowned. So this was what his mother had meant when she warned him of "First Blood." This was what Nerayn had meant.

Kayya sobbed quietly, but he felt as if he'd just been sent to heaven. Her sex was so hot and warm and clenching. Her discomfort only brought him shuddering pleasure as her sex squirmed to clench him out. The guilt thrumming through him, he clutched her soft backside and tried to pry her off, but she suddenly kissed him and began moving her hips, and he sighed against her lips as the slow gyration made him thicker and harder.

"Mmfph . . ." He hugged her tightly and frowned against the pleasure. "Oh . . . Kayya." He looked at her softly and felt his affection for her tripling with every pleasurable clench of her lips. Her face was no longer pained. She was looking at him just as softly, smiling, watching as he took pleasure from the most intimate part of her. She kissed him tenderly, his lips, his thick neck, his ear. A shudder of pleasure went through him when she softly licked his ear and he held her tighter.

"How does it feel?" he whispered to her.

"Weird," she whispered back. "Like someone is cramming a stick in me."

Ettoras laughed softly. "Someone is." He pulled back to frown at her. "Does it still hurt?"

"Stop asking," she whispered through a sudden rise of tears and tried to smile with trembling lips. "You're huge. What do you think?" But she hugged his neck tight and kept moving her hips, slowly and deeply, until he shuddered and moaned. Their foreheads touched, their hot breath rippled their fur. He slipped his tongue out and licked her gasping lips. She was making such sweet love to him . . . he couldn't even move. But it was hurting her.

"You can stop now," he whispered. "I won't last long anyway . . . Kayya . . . you're so beautiful, you feel so good on me . . ." He kissed her ear and hugged her curvy body tight, relishing in the feel of her large breasts crushed against him. "I never thought about . . . I mean, I thought about . . ."

Kayya laughed softly. "The whole point is that you should come inside," she giggled.

Ettoras frowned. "No. We're too young for cubs. And after tonight, I don't think we should . . . again . . . Though I wouldn't mind licking you."

Kayya giggled again. "You're good at it."

"Am I?"

"Mm . . . yes."

Ettoras smiled. But he felt it coming and quickly pried her off. She pulled back and watched as his face contorted, as his erection twitched and he gave a weak cry. His cum slapped his rippling belly and slapped her slender belly as well. He sagged breathlessly as his penis flopped soft between them. She was still staring at it and seemed fascinated. She had never seen a male give his passion before.

"That was icky," she said.

Ettoras laughed. "Shut up. Here . . . taste it!"

"No!" she squealed when he brought his cum-smeared fingers to her mouth. Her breasts jiggled as she tried to escape him. He locked his arm around her and suckled one tenderly, hefting the heavy softness in his paw. She moaned. He squeezed to make her nipple jut and suckled deeper, rolling his tongue.

"E-Ettoras . . ."

"Your tits are so nice," he whispered apologetically. "And your pussy . . . tastes sweet." He slipped his fingers in her sex, and she watched, blushing furiously as he licked them clean.

"Cut it out!" she cried and slapped his chest.

He jerked from the blow and smiled at her, watching as her white mane tumbled. She was so beautiful. Here. In the darkness. Under the stars. As crickets were chirruping. He couldn't help but feel as if he could have loved her. If only she were attracted to males. But . . . she would never love him that way. And reminding himself of the fact, he cleared his throat and said they should get washed up. He flew her back to the river, and this time, he carried her in his arms.

He set her on her feet, and as they waded waist-deep into the water, he knew she was noticing the change in him. He was glad when she said nothing about it and resigned himself to resist falling in love with her with all his might. There was nothing worse in the world than loving someone who couldn't love you back.

"I have to build you a house now," Ettoras said into the silence. He scooped up water and let it splash back through his mane. "Mother says I can't come back to the CrystalPalace."

"You miss her already, don't you?" Kayya asked sympathetically. "You've never gone so long away from her light."

Ettoras dropped his eyes to the water as he was bathing. Yes, he did miss Azrian. He had never spent the night away from the CrystalPalace before. Being on his own was new and frightening. And he didn't know how he'd handle actually living among his worshippers. What would they do when they realized he wasn't a god? Not even a demigod? Would they turn away from him?

"What if we flew there?" Kayya suggested.

Ettoras glanced at her witheringly. "And did what? Begged her to let us live in the CrystalPalace? She wants me to live a mortal life. . . because I'm mortal." He stared glumly at the water.

Kayya scowled at him. "Stop pouting. We could sit around here feeling sorry for ourselves, or we could try. There are ways to unmake a god. Maybe there are ways to make a god."

Ettoras paused as he lifted water to his belly. "What do you mean? And why haven't I ever heard of this?"

"Because your mother tries to hide everything about Aonre from you," Kayya said at once. "She doesn't want you going there, and she has good reason."

Ettoras stared at her, listening with his ears pricked forward.

"You know my father is very old, Ettoras," she went on, gathering water to splash her face. "He lived on Aonre for a long time. Something like three centuries. He was a hunter of Tribe Eden, She of the Rapture. When S'pru appeared in Aonre's sky, his tribe rejoiced, and it is said Eden herself told them to come here. Eden told their Seer many things with visions through the water."

As he was listening, Ettoras glanced down to scoop more water and paused when he saw her. The white vixen was reflected beneath him, sitting on a rock, her chin on her fist. She looked very lonely and sad, all that white hair tumbling down the side of her face, her tail curled over the rock and slapping sadly at the tip. And, ah, she was just as beautiful as ever. Ettoras touched a gentle finger to her face and she disappeared. He stared at the water and realized his heart was pounding.

Kayya let the water fall back through her mane, not noticing what Ettoras was doing. She shook her mane out and lifted her face again, her big breasts gently knocking. "My father says a child of Zihma made your father mortal."

Ettoras looked at her quickly.

"With a dagger made of glass - Skkye Glass. And that's why your father is on Aonre and can not come here."

Ettoras glowered. "I knew it. I knew he was down there," he said bitterly.

"Even if he was immortal, I'm not sure he could come anyway. He's a dog, Ettoras."

"Pft. A god can walk anywhere, can't they?"

"No, I don't think they can," Kayya reflected. "My father told me stories of the gods, the ones older than your mother. They live in Skkye because Aonre is poison to them."

"Why didn't Mother tell me any of this? She never told me about Skkye or anything. I had to learn about Maret and the other gods from Nerayn."

"Maybe your mother thought Aonre would be poison to you. Believe it or not, she probably had a _reason,_Ettoras," Kayya scolded.

Ettoras scowled. "And you never told me! What's your reason!"

"Because I care about you too!" she snapped. "I didn't want you doing something stupid and flying off to Aonre in search of your father."

His chest heaved. "Not that it matters. I'm not immortal. It wouldn't kill me."

Kayya shook her head. "Aonre is dangerous regardless. You look so much like a fox, the creatures down there would kill you in a heartbeat or worse. They used to mount our heads as trophies. Mother says they still do. Sometimes she scrys Aonre to see what is happening there. She left behind a sister who refused to come here." She dropped her eyes and smoothed water along her arm. "The point is, if a god can become mortal, then it's possible a mortal can become a god. If we could make you a god, you could return to the CrystalPalace."

Ettoras snorted. "And become a cold and distant ball of light like my mother? No thanks."

Kayya glared at him for badmouthing Azrian and he dropped his eyes guiltily: he knew damn well Azrian was not cold nor distant. She was warm and caring and gentle, and those who came to worship her were at peace in her light. But Ettoras also knew that the more the years passed, the more withdrawn and indifferent his mother became. She was changing. And some part of him knew there was only a small window of time before the change was permanent and she could never become mortal.

"I thought you wanted so badly to be a god," Kayya said. "Which is it?"

"I don't want to be immortal - I want my mother to be happy," Ettoras realized. "I want to be near her, Kayya. I want to hug her and hold her . . . I want to see her face."

Kayya watched him sympathetically, her dark eyes soft and sad. "We'd have to go to Aonre to find a way," she pointed out. "It's too dangerous! And even if you found a way, how would you get near your mother without bleeding out your ass?"

Ettoras smiled in spite of himself, but he answered seriously, "Kayya . . . my mother is desperately_unhappy. She thinks I don't know it, but I _feel it. I feel her feelings when she's near. If I could bring my father home . . . or maybe . . . bring her to him . . . I just need Skkye Glass."

"No," Kayya said at once.

Ettoras paused and stared at her. "No?"

Kayya shook her head. "I can't let you do anything until you talk to your mother first."

"Kayya . . ."

"Maybe she'll have an answer! Or maybe she'll finally tell you the truth. Or maybe she'll let us live in the CrystalPalace together." Kayya smiled. "I always wanted to see it."

"But my father --"

"Your mother is the Second Light ruling her own world. She isn't helpless, Ettoras. She knows a way to make your father immortal again, she just hasn't done it. Maybe there's a reason for that. Like maybe they don't love each other anymore."

Ettoras frowned. "Don't say that. I'll never find out unless I find him."

"Or you could just ask your mother before you rush off and do something stupid."

Ettoras heaved a frustrated growl.

"Talk to your mother. Give her a chance," Kayya insisted, unfazed. "And then if things look bad, we can go to Aonre."

Ettoras looked at her quickly. "We?"

Kayya smiled. "I'm your wife now. We're in this together."

They flew fast to the CrystalPalace, and as his mane whipped back from his face, Ettoras could feel his heart beating a nervous drum in his chest. He was finally going to confront his mother about everything: his father, Aonre, how S'pru came to be. All the answers were behind her blinding light, and now, perhaps she would tell him a way to finally see past her light. Perhaps he'd finally be able to hold his mother in his arms.

But it wasn't to be. When they came upon the CrystalPalace, Ettoras pulled up short. A golden barrier of light surrounded the floating island, shielding it from all supplicants. Shielding it from him. Ettoras slowly scowled.

"Ettoras," Kayya whispered fearfully. She clung to his neck, her mane in her face, terrified he might drop her in his anger.

Ettoras ignored her, and with a wild roar, he soared at the barrier and punched it. The shield of light reacted at once. It vibrated under the force of his blow, and he felt the shock snap hot through his fur, singeing him like lightning. He roared in agony as he was sent rocketing back. Kayya clung to him and screamed as they tumbled through cloud after cloud. They finally hit a cloud that was thick enough to stop them, and Ettoras slumped on his knees, panting and glaring at the distant palace.

Kayya sat up and touched his shoulder, her white mane tumbling around her. "Ettoras . . . I'm sorry," she whispered, her ears back flat.

Ettoras took her paw and squeezed it. "I will take you to say farewell to your family."

"What?"

"We are going to Aonre."