Guro Challenge #14: Self-Harm
#21 of 33 Day Guro Challenge
Fermald hadn't wanted to agree with him, but she had no choice; Graylunk knew he was insane, but he was not stupid, and he knew there was nothing more the infirmary could do. It was time. In the night he slipped away, taking no food or blanket - why would he need them? - and ran.
He made it further than he had thought he would, but it took less than a day before he had to stop, legs shaking too much and vision too blurred to go further. He found an outcrop of rock in which to hide, and curled up like an infant in the nest, making himself as comfortable as possible on the soft ground between the stones. He wondered; how long would he have to wait?
Hours crawled by, night turned into day which turned to night again, and cold rain began to fall. Graylunk had heard freezing wasn't a bad way to go. He couldn't remember where he'd heard it, but he'd been told in a beast's last moments they would feel warmth and no pain at all. It sounded nice. Might not be cold enough though. He licked raindrops off his whiskers. Dehydration was far harder, he knew that one firstpaw from life at sea. Starvation would take far too long, and that reminded him of other possibilities; he had no wish to meet his end thanks to a larger predator.
He had brought no food, but he had brought a knife. He pulled it from his sleeve and tested the edge, examined his scarred face in the reflection on the blade, put the tip to his wrist. Better to be sure and swift. He was hurting nobeast else, for who would miss him?
Fur and skin parted slowly beneath the blade, red spilling and the wound yawning like a mouth, and he thought of Fermald, but she had known he would never return. With luck, she would never find out about this, and he would not have hurt her more.