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POKER NIGHT, the sign outside the bar's back room said. FIFTY TOONBUCK BUY-IN.

Kevin had toonbucks. There was an exchange at each entrance to the neighborhood and he'd turned in some cash for the colorful scrip. Most business would take dollars but it felt good to fit in.

The drawback to toonbucks was that like non-character toons they would fade and disappear if you stayed away from toon neighborhoods long enough. Toon characters didn't, which is why Gazelle could tour with her tigers and entourage and the Toon Revue bringing in still more real money to the town. Add in the hotels and bars and Toontown wasn't poor and wouldn't be any time soon. Not with Scrooge McDuck and Richie Rich running the district's finances.

There were two cartoon ducks fighting in the bar as he went by, one with white feathers and a sailor suit and the other with black feathers and a beak that a punch had spun around to the back of his head. An enormous cartoon bear left his place by the door and gave them the heave-ho. Even outside they kept fighting. Kevin shook his head and showed his ID to the bouncer at the inner door.

"Tables are full," the bald and heavily muscled toon bouncer rumbled. "You can watch and buy in if someone loses."

Kevin nodded, paid the cover charge for a normal entry, and went in.

Cartoon fans overhead dissipated the smoke from various sources. At the nearest table an man in a sailor suit and what could only be called Popeye arms cursed and threw down his cards. His corncob pipe was one source of the smoke. The next table was all big cats, ranging from what must be one of Gazelle's tiger dancers, two lions, one of the older Looney Tune art style, one more modern, 3-D and stylized, a black panther who might be some version of Bagheera and a slender spotted cat who seemed to have most of the chips at the table.

Kevin's attention was drawn to a flash of technicolor pink. A stylized cartoon cat who was both pink and a panther sat at a table with a blue anteater-ish creature, a long-legged bird of some sort, and a big nosed cartoon man in a brown coat and cap.

Sat amongst these toons was a human man about Kevin's age. Curious, he drifted over and watched as the four toons and the man played a hand of five card stud. The Pink Panther and the anteater, or whatever the blue thing was, were the last ones still in. The panther blew out a smoke ring from his long handled cigarette holder and nodded as he matched the blue thing's final bet.

"Didn't think you had it," purred the cat when the aardvark turned his hole card over, a deuce to go with the two others he had face up. The panther's pair of aces lost. By this time Kevin remembered the blue character. Everyone at the table was from a Pink Panther cartoon, spinoff or other Friz Freleng show. The blue anteater-like thing was from one called The Ant And The Aardvark.

"You never think I do." said the aardvark in a thick Jewish accent.

The panther shrugged and blew another smoke ring. The one human at the table turned and looked at Kevin.

"Friz Freleng table?" Kevin said.

"Sort of developed that way," the man said.

"If you hang around, maybe the Inspector or Crazylegs will lose out and there'll be a spot," the human continued.

"You should be so lucky, Bart," snarked the crane.

"Nice tattoo," said the man.

"Oh, yes," Kevin replied. He showed off the animated toon tattoo on his forearm. "Just got it. They say it'll fade in a few weeks, because they can't use an actual character in a tattoo."

Two tables over one of the big cats threw down his cards, snarled and swiped at the air with his claws. Any one of the cats could tear him apart and he was happy they were a couple of tables away, toons or not.

"So, uh," he said to the man. Bart. "Is it safe to hang around toons? I mean, I read that they are pretty much indestructible, but we aren't."

"You just have to understand the rules," Bart said. "Sam, wanna help me show him?"

"Sure Bart," the aardvark said in his nasally voice.

Bart stood up and leaned across the table toward the aardvark. The Pink Panther, Inspector and crane pulled their chips out of the way. The aardvark's long snout just reached and Kevin scooted his chair back back in alarm when the rubbery tip of the snou sucked itself to the top of Bart's head and slurped it in.

The aardvark braced his clawed hands on the table and sucked. With a long slurp a lumpy bulge of man moved into his rubbery snout. Suddenly there was nothing left of Bart but a set of legs sliding across the table toward the anteater's maw.

Only Kevin reacted with anything more than mild interest. The Pink Panther was shuffling the deck while the Inspector and crane casually stacked their chips. The aardvark sucked again and Bart's shoes disappeared into his rubbery maw.

The aardvark leaned back, lifted his snout and swallowed. He was only about the size of his meal and a ponderous bulge moved down his thick neck, swelling his already fat belly broad and lumpy. The aardvark let out a long, high pitched belch, licked his lips with a narrow liver colored tongue, and patted his twitching gut with both hands.

Horrified, Kevin watched Bart move in the blue creature's stomach. Surely he'd need to breathe soon, whether or not a toon could digest a human.

"Wait," purred the pink panther as Kevin rose to get the bouncer. This had to be against the rules, right? He paused as the cat's word and went even more wide-eyed as something silvery appeared in the aardvark's blue hide just below his neck.

It was the end of a cartoon zipper. The aardvark watched placidly as his belly unzipped between his hands and Bart emerged none the worse for wear other than a thick coating of cartoon drool. Sam the aardvark helped Bart climb out of his gut, flipped the zipper grip so it was on the outside, then zipped himself back up again. The zipper disappeared once it was fully zipped.

"See. Harmless." Bart settled back in his chair and wiped his face with a cartoon napkin. His long sleeved shirt and pants were soggy but he hadn't been in there long enough for them to soak through.

Kevin sat back down and shook his head. "That is the weirdest thing I've ever seen."

"You haven't been in Toontown much then," said the aardvark. "Want to try it? Hell of a story to tell back home."

"Well," Kevin said, with the whole table looking at him expectantly. "What the hell, why not."

Rather than make people move their chips again he got up and walked past the pink panther. The aardvark was waiting, its short legs and long body making it as tall in the chair as he was standing up. Blue cartoon hands with blunt claws reached out and gripped his upper arms and the last thing Kevin saw was the aardvark's rubbery mouth expanding over his face.

With a single long slurp the aardvark engulfed him to the waist, the advancing maw pushing Kevin's arms down against his sides. With no table to hold his meal up Sam leaned forward and sucked, a lumpy bulge of human once more moving along his snout. Kevin's legs from the knees down waved briefly from his snout as Sam sat back up, and then with a last slurp and gulp it was over.

"Told you," Bart said, and the aardvark nodded as the lumpy bulge of Kevin moved beneath his blue hide. At first the movements were slow and unworried, but that didn't last. The shapes of hands pressed out from and the movements became frantic as Kevin felt around for the zipper and couldn't find it.

"Sure enough," said the aardvark, and dropped the cartoon zipper he'd palmed after zipping up his belly onto his pile of chips. All of this he pushed over to Bart, who nodded and smiled.

"Oh," said the aardvark, and grabbed a toonbuck from the pile of chips. "Got to pay for my room."

He stood, Kevin's frantic struggle making his belly twitch and kick, and let out a long satiated belch. The struggle was already weakening as Kevin's air departed and was gradually replaced by toon stomach acid. Kevin didn't see Bart wiping his hands clean of drool which doubled as digestive slime. There was a cartoon stomach wall between him and that sight.

"I'm out boys," the aardvark said, burped once more, and fed the toonbuck into a slot in the wall until a door popped open. Normally these little side rooms were used for romantic trysts or the enthusiastic fucking of human tourists, but he needed it for something else. The last they saw of the anteater as the door swung shut was him settling down on the bed to sleep off his meal. There was too much noise to hear the gurgles of digestion that began to consume the now nearly motionless Kevin.

"Hm," purred the pink panther. "We're down a man." He lifted a finger to summon another player but paused as a human woman, a curious college student from the looks of her, came in the door.

"Hm. Indeed," said Bart, who popped the cartoon zipper back into his belt pouch next to the cartoon doorknob. Another fanny pack on the other side held more essentials. Bart knew the rules and came prepared.

"Tell you what," Bart said. He looked at the small pile of chips in front of him, then the larger one in front of the pink panther. "I'll make you a bet."

With that he waved to the human girl, and was all smiles when she came over and sat in the chair Kevin didn't need any more.