FSE

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2593-27

The sound of his children talking to each other, the nannybots and to no one in particular made a relaxing backdrop for Eric to work on his report, and place the orders needed for the ship to be ready to head out again after their week on Earth. The clang of docking had just happened, startling the boys and setting them talking.

The communication request surprised him, Elliot rarely bothered contacting him when they were to meet face to face in a few hours. He accepted it, and the holographic image of his brother appeared. That was even more surprising. Normally he preferred just using a comm window.

"Elliot, what can I do for you?"

His brother looked over the children, running among the nannybots. "I wanted to talk to you about taking some time off."

"I am, I'll be spending the week down with you guys."

Elliot focused on him. "That isn't what I mean. I'd like you to step away from being a captain for a few years."

"What? Why?"

"So, you can raise your sons, why else?"

"I don't need to quit my job to do that. I'm managing it fine."

"I'm not talking about quitting, just a sabbatical. Until your sons are older." He looked at the children again. "And how can you say you're managing, you've had to buy nannies to raise them for you."

"They aren't raising them, they're just looking after them when I have to work."

"Exactly. They're your kids, not those machines', you should be focusing on them. Look, it would just be a few years. You could move into one the houses with them, I know dad would love to fix one of them up for you. You aren't like the other citizens, you don't have to worry about holding a job to keep your house. But if you really feel you have to, I know the hospital could use someone as gifted as you."

"No. Elliot, this is my life. I'm not walking away from it just because you don't think I'm doing things right."

Elliot sighed. "Don't you see. That's exactly what I mean." He motioned around them. "That, this metal box, that isn't your life. They are your life now." He indicated the children.

Eric rubbed the top of his muzzle. "And you're not getting it. I don't have to raise them like dad raised us. Dad and mom stopped everything for us, but that doesn't mean it's the only, or even the best, way to do it. I'm here for them. I spend most of my time with them. My use of nannybots is no different than when dad got one of his brothers to look after us."

"Of course, it's different! They're family. These are just machines! They have no business being involved in raising any of us!"

Eric stood and headed for the door.

"Where are you going?"

"I grabbing a shuttle and coming down. I'm not having this discussion over holo. If you're going to start screaming at me, I want to be there so I can shove you away. I'll be there under the hour."

Eric didn't give his brother a chance to reply, he left the room. The hall didn't have holographic emitters, so he couldn't follow him. As an extra precaution, he auto declined communication requests from him. It was petty, but right now he didn't care. His brother had no business telling him how to go about raising his family. If he had such strong feelings about how it should be done, he should have said he'd be the one having a family. He'd missed his chance.

William was putting a panel back in place on the wall. He had his tools at his belt and the smell for welding was in the air.

"Will, I need to go have a talk with my brother, can you make sure someone looks in on the kids while I'm gone. I should be back before the shutdown inspection is finished. A couple of hours, three at the most."

"Should we be on the lookout for problems?"

"No, it's family business. Elliot poking his muzzle in my family business. Nothing that needs to worry the crew."

"Okay, we'll wait until you're back before locking up."

Eric stopped and considered things. "No, if for some reason it takes me longer than I expect to talk some sense into my brother, don't have everyone hang about the ship. Ask for two to stay until I get back, the others can start their time off."

"Okay. I'll see you when you get back then."

Before leaving Eric checked if there was any more information he should tell William. He was making an effort not to keep needed information to himself, but in this case, he thought he'd told him everything.

He nodded to Robert and Gerald. On their way to look at the array coupling, from the tools they carried. Outside he headed directly for the shuttle rental kiosk closest to their dock. He didn't bother checking the company name. He didn't care who he rented from, so long as they had a model with as few windows as possible.

If he could get such a model from his corporation, without having to explain to his brother, and father, Francis would insist on finding out why Eric didn't want to admire the landscapes as he flew, he'd have his own shuttle stored here.

He got a two-person, privacy, model. Like each time he saw that, he smiled. He'd never confirmed it, but he suspected the privacy models existed because of Orr citizen and their practice of having sex when bored. And after time on the station, with its rules regarding appropriate behavior, any Orr citizen would be inclined to have sex the moment they weren't under SolGov governance anymore.

He received his shuttle assignment, and headed to the lift. Normally he took the low speed lifts on stations, but this time, both because he was in a hurry, and to practice his tolerance of shifting gravity, he went for the high speed one. He would have preferred being alone in it, but four others got in at the same time.

Eric controlled his breathing as the doors closed and prepared himself for the floor to drop out from under him. Even expecting it he almost reached for the handle bar along the wall. He didn't know why there wasn't gravity plating in the lift's floor, but with the speed they were going down, he expected he was experiencing close to zero G, point nine as the most.

After six months of practice, he was much better at keeping the panic at bay, so long as he knew the shift was coming. When William canceled the gravity while Eric walked, it sent him in a fit of panic that could take minutes to bring under control.

Right now, he focused on his breathing and keeping his eyes open. One of the women, a rodent with tan fur turned to talk to her companion, a slim wolf with bright pink fur, and the motion made her feet leave the floor and she started spinning. With a chuckle she grabbed him and he held on to the bar.

He envied how comfortable they were with it. He was sweating and had his clothing set to cancel the scent, but he thought he still got a whiff of his fear. It felt like a long time before the lift slowed, and then stopped, but checking, the kilometer-long trip had only taken forty-eight seconds.

He paused after stepping out to give himself time to calm down. Still this was a marked improvement, before William's training, the idea of stepping into a high-speed lift would send Eric's heart racing.

His shuttle flashed in his vision. It was in the departure side of the hangar. Stepping in, he instructed it to go to Orr Corp headquarter as fast as it could. No matter what Elliot might think, Eric didn't want to be away from his sons any longer than he had to.

He leaned back in the seat, he should have asked one of the crew to come with him, he could go for some sex right now. He considered jerking off, but decided against it. Being pent up for a while simply meant he'd have more to take out on Elliot-after he'd gotten his brother to see some sense.

* * * * *

The pounding in his head woke Eric. And even through his closed eyes he could see that someone had left a strong light on before he went to bed. Although he didn't remember going to bed, or what he might have done previously. His headache indicated he'd done some kind of chemical drug. It had to be alcohol, it was the only thing mind altering chemical he allowed himself, but how much had he had?

A check of the time told him it was only four in the morning. With a silent curse he reached for the light controls, but didn't find it. There were no electronic controllers of any kind within range of his implant.

Where was he?

He cracked an eyelid open, and was blinded by the light. An arm over his face provided shade, enough of it for him to see bright blue above him, a lot of blue, with wisps of white here and there. He closed his eyes and slammed his hand down, digging his finger in to keep himself from flying off.

Don't shift, don't shift. The words zoomed through his mind over and over. He was outside. How had he gotten there? Where was everyone else? He couldn't have come here on his own. What was he going to do?

First thing to do-breathe.

Right, breathing. Slow breath in, and out.

The more breaths he took, the slower the words raced, until they were only two words among many. His heart was still faster than normal, but it no longer felt like it was trying to punch its way out of his chest.

Second thing-open your eyes. He had to look around, figure out his environment and work out how to get to safety.

He couldn't open his eyes. Not with the wide sky above him. To look at the sky was to invite gravity to shift.

Alright, he couldn't do that one, but he still needed to figure out his environment. He took a deep breath. He smelled dried grass and disturbed earth. He had to smile. He was amazed he recognized those scents, the last time he'd smelled dried grass was when he'd visited Samson and Samuel. It had been the height of summer, it had been a dry summer in their area. They could have ordered rain to take care of that, but they'd explained that it was good for the grass to dry like that, that in a few weeks they'd light it on fire and it would help replenish the soil.

Dry grass, soil, no electronics within range.

What was he doing so far from any city?

Wait a minute, what was the sun doing up at four in the morning? It was only early summer, it should still be at least an hour before sunrise. He gulped, did he have to open his eyes to confirm where the sun was? No, he'd looked almost straight into it, so it was around noon. Was his implant off? It couldn't be. He had the time locked to headquarter time. He didn't travel to other territories, so he didn't want to accidentally catch other times.

Far enough from any city, in another territory. Even if he was on the east coast, the sun would be close to the horizon. Four to noon, seven hours. Halibury?

No, he'd seen the maps, there was no large expanses of grass left there. The territory was one large city.

So, he was in Soromis. What was he doing there? He forced himself to think past the headache. What was the last thing he clearly remembered? Gravity shifting as the lift moved down. Then it'd stopped. Where had he been? The rental shuttle hangar. He'd gone to his shuttle. Gotten in and ordered it to go to headquarter...

He couldn't remember anything after that.

How long ago was that? He brought up the date. A day and a half ago.

This didn't make any sense. Had he crashed? His implant didn't report any damage to his body, although he was slightly dehydrated.

Okay, enough analyzing, he needed to work on getting to safety. That meant looking around. He couldn't open his eyes; the sky was what he'd see. Gravity might shift.

Damn it. Gravity couldn't shift.

Knowing that didn't help.

What could he do without sight? What could he do so he wouldn't have to look at the sky?

He tried to raise an arm, but he couldn't even manage to loosen his grip on the ground.

If he let go, he might fly away.

He really hated his phobia.

Think Eric.

Letting go on one hand couldn't be enough for him to fly away, he still had his other hand grasping the ground. One hand is enough to hold me in place even if gravity shifts.

He forced his breathing to slow. He couldn't forget to breathe.

With effort he relaxed a hand. Nothing happened. His heart calmed slightly.

See, we're still here. Getting his arm over his body took much more effort. He kept feeling like it was the first pull of gravity raising it, instead of his will. He had to grab onto himself out of fear it would end up dangling up, and grasped fur instead of his shirt. Was he not wearing-

Later!

He had to flip on his stomach, that meant rolling over his other arm. That would make it press even harder on the ground, anchoring him in place. That proved surprisingly difficult. He had to raise a leg over the other, which meant he had to convince himself that wasn't going to send him flying off.

He managed to move the leg without raising it much, keeping it in contact with the other leg. Then roll on his side enough he could dig the fingers of his free hand in the soil and pull himself the rest of the way. He stayed like that, muzzle in the grass, breathing the scent of soil up close, for a long time.

He'd managed it. He'd gotten himself rolled over in spite of his fear. Once his heart slowed, he'd get back to step two.

He waited two minutes, then he opened his eyes. He saw crushed golden strands. For a moment he thought about the color, wondering what it might look like on his fur. He'd never done gold before, had he? He didn't think so. Gold stripes with black fur. That would be an interesting contrast.

He'd stalled long enough. He moved his head and looked ahead. The golden grass was low to the ground and went on as far as he could see. He checked the left and the right. Same.

So, he really was away from everything. Not even a tree to crawl under. He closed his eyes and gave himself a moment to accept just how royally fucked he was.

As he set about to search again for some controller, he noticed he had a request for communication pending. He accepted it with a rush of hope.

"I need help," he said, without preamble.

"Mister Orr," the person answered. The voice was male, calm. "I am so glad you finally decided to talk with me." He was much too calm. And Eric had a sense the request had been pending for a time when he finally noticed it. Whoever that was should be concerned as to why to took him so long to respond, not calm.

Unless he had something to do with why Eric was there?

How far was he? He had to be inside the range of Eric's implant, his implant didn't detect another one in range. Could this be an illusion? Was he in a building somewhere? Quarantine field would explain why he wasn't detecting anything. And those could be modulated to allow specific frequencies.

"Mister Orr? Are you there?"

"Who are you?"

A chuckle. "Who I am isn't important. I think you'd be more interested in finding out about the situation you find yourself in."

"I'm in the middle of a field. That's obvious."

"Yes, but why are you there? I admit, I didn't believe the information I got. I mean, in this day and age, who has a phobia? But there you are, under the bright blue sky, unable to move. I have to say that's rather amazing. What kind of psychological problem must someone have to prefer keeping a phobia rather than having it removed. But then again, I've always thought you Orrs were a screwed-up bunch."

"How did you find out about my phobia?"

"Ahh, a young mister Xavier Detros was handed to me when I was given your contract. I questioned him thoroughly. There was an incident on a landing pad, something about your father coming to kiss and grope him. Really, will you Orrs actually fuck anything that moves? I always thought that was propaganda. Anyway, he saw you freaking out before being kissed. That gave me a starting point and some research showed me that you never go anywhere alone. You are afraid of wide open spaces."

So, he'd gotten it wrong, but close enough not to be of any help.

"Is Xavier still alive?"

"He was once I was done with him."

"So, what do you want? You Vanguard people are always trying to cause us trouble. Although this is the first time you've been quite this direct. You realize that my family is already looking for me. All I have to do is stall you long enough and they'll get you."

"Really? Does your family know about your agoraphobia? I don't expect they do. I can't see them allowing you to keep such an easy thing to exploit. I've left them plenty of trails to follow, none of which lead here. I expect you'll die of thirst before they even realize they're chasing air."

Eric sighed. He was right, who'd ever thing of looking for a captive in an open field.

"And I'm not a Vanguard citizen."

"Fine, then you work for them. I'm going to be happy to tell which ever corporation you live under what you did."

A chuckle. "I'm not a citizen of any corporation."

"An Independent? What are you doing working for Vanguard? I thought your types didn't want to have anything to do with any corporation."

"Well, ideals are very nice, but the reality is that we all need money. And me doing this job lets me bring in enough money for the others to be able to keep their illusions of being detached from the corporations. I know, it probably makes me something of a hypocrite, but what can I do."

Eric sighed. "Fine, so what does Vanguard want you to do?"

"I don't know that it's Vanguard, although considering your history, it probably is. As for what I need you to do, is grant me access to your implant."

Eric was stunned for a moment, then he laughed. "You're kidding, right? You expect me to give you access? I do that and you can get into any of our system."

"That is the point I believe."

"You're not getting that. I don't particularly care what you do to me, I am never going to let you in. Fuck, you'd control me if I did. I'd rather die."

"That is what will happen. And once you die, all I have to do he collect your implant and I'll be able to force my way in. Wouldn't you rather live?"

"That's bullshit. My implant is tied to me. I die all accesses get wiped. The only thing that'll be left are whatever memories are in my buffer. And those wouldn't help you."

"I'd really hoped you were one of those who believed the stories floating around about the implants. It would have made things so much easier."

"I'm an Orr," Eric growled. "Not one of those citizens who don't do anything with their lives. You think we don't know how the technology works? Fuck, we invented a lot of it. Speaking if which, where the fuck is my clothing?"

"You mean the belt thing you wore? I'm afraid that was cut off you and given to scientist to investigate. Whatever it is, it's impressive stuff, if it's ripped it reattaches itself. They are going to have a blast figuring out what else it does"

They were going to waste their time. It was proprietary technology for a reason, when they'd cut it off him, they had released nanites programed to destroy any electronic component within the belt, turn them to base atoms. Good luck to them figuring out how it worked.

"So," the man said. "I guess you have about a day and a half to make up your mind. You give me access, and I promise I'll return you to your family immediately."

Eric snorted. "But not before doing something to me, right? Doing some personality adjustment so I'll be loyal to Vanguard maybe? Wouldn't that be a coup for them, get one of the Orrs under their control. Get me to betray my family. Not going to happen. I'm going to die first. And I don't have a day and a half. It's too hot and dry, I'm dehydrating faster, I have maybe a day."

"Really? I suppose you'd know, you're the doctor."

"You have anything else to say? More threats to make, more promises?"

"No, I've said my piece, the rest is up to you."

"Good." He shut the communication channel. He needed the quiet to focus. He thought about setting a general ignore, but he might want to hear what his captor had to say at some point.

Step one and two had been accomplished, as had three. Now he needed to make a plan. That was easy enough, he had to get moving.

He couldn't stand up. There was no way he could convince himself that was safe, but he should be able to get on all four. That'd be a start, and easier to move than crawling.

Or maybe it wasn't that easy, he found out as his body refused to obey him. He had to move, if he stayed here he was going to die. Except he also knew that any movement might set gravity off, and he'd float away to die.

So, he was fucked either way. If that was the case, he had to take the option that increases the chances he'd survive. He was inside a quarantine field. That meant it ended somewhere. If it was a wall, then he was inside and all this was a very good hologram. There would be a wall to grab on in case gravity shifted, and there would be a door.

If he was outside, which seemed more likely, then he could cross the field and send a distress call. How large could the field be? It couldn't be more than a kilometer, could it?

All he had to do, was get on all four. He'd be able to keep a hand in the ground at all time against a gravity shift. Slowly he pulled a leg under him, then the other. Okay, now get a hand before him, that proved tougher, letting go of the ground scared him, he had to remind himself his other hand was grasping it firmly. Once his fingers were in the ground, his other hand joined it.

Now came the hard part, he had to pull himself up. He had to get his body off the ground. That was the most massive part of himself, if gravity took hold of that, would he be able to keep hold of the ground? He focused on his fingers, they were deep in the soil, they would hold him. As he let go of his breath, he pulled himself to all fours.

He waited then, giving his heart a chance to calm, and to see if gravity would play with him. When nothing happened for a full minute, he decided to move forward.

Again, his body refused to move.

Come on, he couldn't be that stupid, he'd gotten here, gravity hadn't shifted. But it wouldn't take much for it to happen. Now that his torso was higher, it would be easier for gravity to take hold of it.

That was idiotic. Fuck he hated his phobia, at least it could have the decency of being logical.

He forced himself to relax his right hand, and waited. Nothing happened, gravity didn't pull him up. He reached forward and quickly dug his finger in. He moved the right knee forward, that was easier; it wasn't holding on to anything. His left hand resisted for a moment, and then he managed to move it forward, past the right and dig into the soil. Then the left leg.

He'd moved what? Half a meter? And it had taken him fifty-two seconds. He laughed at himself. Tucker would be so ashame of him. Fuck, even Terrence, who had been the last of his sons to start crawling, and had never matched the speed of his brothers could go faster than Eric.

Hopefully it would get easier the more he did it.

It wasn't. Each time he had to convince himself gravity couldn't pull him away from the ground, that he was holding on tightly, and only then would he be able to move.

But he did move. Slowly, one step at a time, he moved. He kept his eyes on the ground as much as possible, and when he looked up, he kept his gaze low to see as little of the sky as he could, where it touched the horizon.

After traveling this was for three hours, he now knew he was going north, but he couldn't tell if he was getting closer to anything. All he saw was dried grass, and the horizon. Even being in Soromis, he couldn't believe there was anywhere without a communication tower every few kilometers. He had to be inside then.

Eric received a communication request, and debated accepting it. He did, because he needed something to distract him while he crawled.

"You're shaking, don't you think you should take a rest?"

Arm forward. "I'm going to rest once I get out of here. Out of curiosity, how far do I have to go?" leg forward.

"I'm afraid you'll be crawling for a very long time." Another arm. "You should just stop. Exerting yourself like this probably dehydrates you faster." Other leg.

"Yeah, it does. How about you tell me where the closest tree is?" Start over again. "The shade should give me a few extra minutes."

"Mister Orr, I don't think you're taking this seriously. All you are doing is moving where your body is going to be found."

"If I haven't started cracking jokes, it means I'm still doing okay. Actually, I figure that if I walk far enough I'll get out of your range and won't have to worry about you bothering me again." He ended the communication. This wasn't the kind of distraction he needed.

The sun would reach the horizon. He tried to find out when sunset was today, but without a connection, he couldn't find out. That was a piece of information he'd never expected to need.

He continued crawling as the sun got closer to the horizon, then below it and the sky darkened. His tongue felt thick, the headache, which had faded for a time was coming back.

His captor requested contact again. Eric ignored him. One hand in front of the other. He couldn't believe that after all these hours, he still didn't accept gravity wouldn't shift all of a sudden. Maybe William was right and he should get it removed and deal with the consequences afterward. The request came every few seconds, but it was easy to ignore, a simple dot at the edge of his vision. He didn't go for auditory prompts, those were too distracting.

Fifteen minutes later, a request came, tagged as urgent. Eric groaned. That flashed in front of his eyes, bright yellow.

"Damn it! What do you want?" he said.

"I was wondering if it might not be better for you to rest for the night."

"Worried I'm going to get out of the quarantine and call for help?"

"I wouldn't get my hopes up if I were you. You are nowhere near the demarcation line."

"Then I guess I'll drop dead on my way there."

"How about you stop and I have a drone bring you some water and food?"

"So you need me alive then."

"I need you to give me access to your implant, like you said, you can't do that dead."

"And I won't do it while I live, so you shouldn't waste your water."

A sigh. "Are all the Orrs suicidal, or is it just you?"

"No records of any of us taking his life, so I'd say no. But I'm sure anyone of us would give up their lives to protect our family."

"You're not protecting your family, you're protecting a machine. Corporations are nothing more than digital machines put in place to keep control over the population. You might think your family controls the corporation, but they are actually slaves to it."

Eric had to laugh. "Is that what you Independents think? We're slaves? You really haven't studied my family, have you."

"I don't need to. All the corporations are the same. You really think you decided what you'd do with your life? No, it was picked for you by a program, which was creating by another program, that-"

Eric was laughing so hard he fell on his side, catching a glance of the night sky only hiccupped the laughter while he shut his eyes tightly. When the laughter died down he remained lying down. He wouldn't tell his captor that, but he was tired.

"You think that's funny?" this captor said.

"Yeah, Hilarious. No one decided for me."

"That's what it wants you to think. What do you think that implant of yours does? It has the power to change your thoughts."

What his captor said gave him pause. "You don't have an implant, do you?"

"Of course not."

Eric forced himself back on hands and knees. "I'd heard stories about Independents not getting them, I never believed them. How are you talking to me then?" He took one breath and began to move. Hours of doing this, and still his mind fought him each step.

"There were communication devices long before implants."

"You can't have access to the information net then. No memory buffers? How do you function without body readouts?"

A snort. "Those are artifacts created by the machine to give you a semblance of control."

"Man, I don't envy you. Your life has to be incredibly tough."

"I'm not like you. I'm not willing to sacrifice my freedom just to have an easy life."

Now it was Eric's turn to snort. "You say that because you don't live with an implant. I didn't sacrifice anything. The implant doesn't take anything away, it adds things to my life."

Eric looked up, it was easier now, with the black sky losing itself in the general darkness. Eric frowned, were those lights in the distance?

"You're just one of the cogs in the machines then. This would have been easier if you could see it."

Maybe there were buildings, and the daylight had hidden them. Or more likely it was his reluctance to look up that had kept him from seeing them. He had no idea how far they were, but now he knew he could get out of this. All he had to do was reach them.

"You don't have anything to say?" his captor asked.

"No. I don't care enough to try to explain the ways in which you're wrong. Now, if you don't mind, I'm going to keep going. If I'm going to die, I'd prefer not having to listen to you anymore." He ended the communication.

The night was extraordinarily dark. He'd never been outside and only had the stars for light. There were places on the islands without lights, but the paths to get there were lit, and enough of that light reached them, that until know, Eric hadn't realized they hadn't been completely dark.

He wondered if the moon was covered with clouds, or simply dark tonight. How much brightness would a full moon generate? He knew someone had calculated that, he'd looked it up when he was younger, but he didn't remember, and he couldn't look it up again at the moment.

He turned off the clock's display. He didn't want to know how long he was crawling anymore. He didn't think he'd make it to morning if he didn't reach those lights. The stress of fighting his own mind to move toward his survival was making him sweat, which was dehydrating him. He didn't check how badly, he didn't want to know how long he had to live.

One hand in front of the other.

If nothing else, he'd be able to say he'd confronted his fear, even if he didn't think this qualified as a victory. His phobia still had him crouched to the ground. Maybe he'd be a slave to his fear until his death. The way things were going, it was almost certainly so. But that wasn't a reason for him to give up.

One hand in front of the other.

He refused to look at regrets. If he was going to die here, he was going to focus on the good things he'd had. His father, his brothers, the rest of his family. The first time he and his father had sex. The tryst with the boy his father didn't like, the son of one of the corporation's accountants. That guy had been fun. It was interesting he couldn't remember his name or what he'd looked like. He'd been an elk, Eric thought.

Then he couldn't think as a barrage of signals assaulted him.

He looked up in surprise, and before him stood a kangaroo wearing a sharp uniform of some sort.

"I really wished you hadn't managed to do this. It would have been much simpler for you that way."