FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

A new day. A new day... Get up already, dammit! Even though the winter chill permeating the room would crawl up his spine the very second he so much dared to pull out a single toe from beneath the blankets. Really, what was the point of getting up during such a cold season, when he had a perfectly comfortable bed to spend the day in? The only real improvement he could think of was a hunk next to him to cuddle with, but alas, beggars can't be choosers.

That was just one of many things that went through Raz's head as he drifted between sleep and awareness, constantly shifting around in his sheets, trying to fall back into Morpheus' arms, despite his brain's complaints. From time to time, he seriously considered getting up, start the day, be productive! Only for the cold against his crimson scales to immediately eliminate those thoughts. 'If you got it, flaunt it' was a great philosophy on paper, but it clearly didn't take the weather in consideration. Bed was such an easier, more comfortable option, and as his head continued to boot up, a slow process, like every morning, he remembered his phone beneath his pillow, left alone after the previous night's... activities. The moment he fished it back up, he realized he had everything he could possibly need, and how fast his morning would go away by browsing through Instagram for hot guys in skimpy underwear. And when 'Jocks in jocks' was the first thing that popped up in his screen, he considered it as fa-

The sheet flew off the bed, leaving Raz completely naked, exposed to the cold air, as he sat up on his bed. None of that mattered to him. His eyes were focused on the phone; texts from work, missed calls from his father, nothing out of the ordinary. It was the date that caught his attention. The date...

---

It was a cold winter day; the kind of day that most people would rather spend inside their homes, with some warm drink in their hands, hiding from the cold beneath a blanket and playing games all day. Quite coincidentally, that was exactly what Manny was doing. The young man stared at the television from under his hat, unable to tear his eyes apart, while pressing button after button to get his opponent off the field. Said opponent, however, was proving to be quite a challenge right now, partially because the cold didn't let him move his fingers as much as he would've liked, but mostly as a distraction; Manny refused to tear his eyes from the TV because he couldn't fathom how his friend could spend the day in nothing but shorts and a tank, and if he didn't, he would constantly turn around to stare at him and ask himself the exact same question over and over again.

Koku was in pretty much the same state, his brain completely focused on the game, but unlike his younger friend and the heat cocoon he had locked himself in, the ghost wore such flimsy clothes and had such a relaxed stance, you could mistake him for a beach party frat boy. Must've been an undead thing, but he even had the audacity of scratching his chest, his claws sinking in the short purple fur, as if rubbing on Manny's face that he could wear looser clothes.

"Have I ever mentioned you have huge, juicy tits?"

"What the fuck!? Where did that come from!?" understandably, Koku's first reaction was to cover said tits up. What he didn't expect was the explosive sound effect coming from the screen as his character was sent flying. "Hey, that's cheating!"

"Don't you mean chesting? Haha," and for such a bad joke, Manny got a controller thrown at him; not like it did much to stifle his laughter. What did do the trick, however, was the sudden ruckus coming from the nearby room, followed by a crash and a loud curse. "What's his deal?"

"He's probably late for work again. Ah, but I thought he was off today? Maybe he fell off his bed again," by the time he turned around to look back at his friend, the look the man was giving him was one of disbelief. "He... has bad days sometimes, ok?"

Neither of them was prepared for the door bursting open, nor for Raz jumping out, wearing clothes for once, Koku thought. The tall, muscular dragon seemed to have the same ability as his roommate to stand lower temperatures, if his choice of shorts and a sleeveless jacket was any sort of evidence; either that, or he was willing to fight off the cold for the chance of showing off. Manny considered the latter to be far more likely. As for Raz himself? Whether it was resistance or vanity, the cold was the last of his concerns; he was searching, looking all over the place, until his eyes landed on the very same couch they were sitting on.

"Happy! BIRTHDAY!!!" he screamed at the top of his lungs right as he launched himself at the ghost, immediately crushing him under his arms in an embrace that would've squeezed the life out of him had he actually had any left. For a moment, however, he did seem to turn more purple. "Hi, Manny. Is that Smash?"

"Konichiwa," was the man's answer, and he quickly tapped away to throw Koku off the field again. That only got a purple claw to reach and hold his wrist down.

"Stop," Koku's tone was surprisingly threatening, and while it did work, it did nothing to deter his friend's trollish expression. Next thing, however, was kicking the dragon off him, getting back enough room to breath and sitting up to stare at him in the eye. "Jesus, don't do that again! You brute! You musclehead! You..." Koku had to stop when Raz stood up and started flexing, the bulging arms immediately grabbing his attention and clearing out any anger he may had felt. But because that wasn't enough, he actually zipped down and started pec bouncing, getting the tiniest of whimpers out of the ghost. "God, you're so hot..."

"First, I know," the dragon said while zipping up, despite his roommate trying to make him keep the jacket off. "Second, and this one's just to be clear, this is definitely not your gift. I got a lot of other stuff planned for tonight, so Stan and I are going check on all that this afternoon."

"Oooh! Are you having a party? You didn't invite me to your birthday party!? How dare!" and without even looking at the screen, Manny threw Koku off the field again.

"Stop that!" at last, he took the controller off his friend's hands. "It's not a party. Chark and I are having dinner together tonight, and Raz offered to take care of decoration and all that stuff. You know, so it feels more birthday-like, and we can have a good time together."

"Did he?" again, an expression of disbelief, but this time his smile did falter. While Koku vigorously nodded, he looked up at the dragon behind him, the slight frown and the sharp look he gave him saying everything he needed to know.

"I did! Because that's what friends do, they look out for each other," the heavy crimson hand patted the ghost, getting swiftly swatted away as a result, and Raz returned to his usual cheerful self. "I'll have everything delivered here, and I'll probably stay at my dad's for the night, so feel free to be as loud as you want. Not like you guys stop when I am here!" Koku's blush was enough to get another good laugh out of the dragon. "Oh, right! I got a text from work, asking me if I can do a bit of a noon show, so I'll be going out now. Probably won't see you until the morning."

"What? But it's my birthday!" the puppy look he gave him could've melted anyone else, but Raz, who had already seen it before... No, it still worked wonders, and he felt himself about to cave in before a quick pat made it disappear from the ghost's face. "Tch, fine. But while you're doing that, you might as well buy some milk and eggs, we're out," and with that, he pulled out an old, tattered, almost torn apart wallet from his back pocket.

"Dude, that thing's hella old," Manny said when he saw the wallet opening, tiny bits of leather falling off every time it moved or stretched when a pair of purple fingers fished in a few bills. "Is that mold? You should seriously get a new one."

"Nonsense! Raz gave this to me when we were kids, it's an important memento. Besides, it's holding up just fine," and he shook it once, gently, to prove his point; that one time was all it took for it to tear in half, and the side with his cards to fly away and land with a heavy thud. Sudden silence fell between the three men as they simply stared at it... "It's holding up fine!"

"Silly ghost," Raz patted him again before putting the money in his own pocket. "You know, I didn't even remember I gave you that one. Can't believe you've kept it all this long. Manny's right, you should throw it away."

"Fucking never! Now, give me one more hug," and because he couldn't resist the ghost's open arms, nor his silly, childish grin, the dragon held him once again between his strong arms, tight, not wanting to let go... Until he noticed Manny staring at them, silently mouthing the words 'Tell him', and getting him to frown and shush. As if he could...

"Well, time to go! A lot of laps need this ass!" one good spank was all it took for him to show off before he was out of the door. "Don't do anything lewd without me here!"

---

'Don't do anything lewd', he said, and was now noticing the irony. Being a stripper, lewd was ingrained in his job, as today insisted on showing him. An early shift, barely any guy around to see the show, but as experience had shown him, the ones that bothered to go while the sun was still up were always the real sleazebags (and thus, sadly, the ones that paid the best); and to top it off, the big man decided to go for a cowboy theme. Great! That meant skimpy, sleeveless vests and tight thongs to go with the assless chaps. Under normal circumstances, Raz would be thrilled over the outfit: the more skin and bulge he could show off, the better, and he'd be damned if he didn't rock the hat. But with this kind of customers...

"Yeah, handsome. Ride the rodeo!" let's just say, these were the kind of customers that didn't think twice to pay for a private room and show. Nor were they the ones to stop themselves when it came to rubbing and groping a guy while he was grinding against their bulges. And as his luck had it, he always got the rougher ones, the ones that left his pecs and abs sore just from their touch. What he would give to just turn around and break the guy's nose right there... If it wasn't for the twenties he was slipping into his underwear. "Bet you hadn't seen one as big as this before!"

"Enough to make me go 'yeehaw!', buddy!" god, he wanted to die, but the money was well worth it. Even when his hand reached up and his fingers dove into his mouth, despite the burning desire to just bite them off, he sucked and licked them, gave them his best service in the hope that they would get him some extra change. Even as a hand started slipping into his thong- "Wow, there! Sir, that much is off... limits..." he had stopped the old gator and was about to get up for real, until the $100 bill caught his attention. In a single second, he debated himself, his head trying to convince the rest of his body that it was a bad idea, despite the fact it knew that was a losing fight. It wasn't like he hadn't done it before.

Slowly, almost regretting it, he let go the old man's arm, and without missing a bit, the now free hand dove into his underwear, quickly grabbing his flaccid length. Raz had to hold back a wince from the rough handling, but as he started getting stroked, he realized he had to focus his mind on something else. Big, hunky, nice guys started filling his head, showering him with praise and kisses, their hands crossing all over his chest before pulling his head closer, pressing it against thick, soft, fuzzy... purple pecs...

"Hot damn! You like it that much, don't you, slut?" another tight grasp on his boner pulled him back into reality, and only now he noticed how hard he had gotten in a matter of seconds. That was about to end, however, as the same fingers entered his mouth again, and a raspy tongue licked his neck, following with a nibble that made him shake. He had never felt the urge to gag so much in his life.

But for once, luck decided to give him a break and the music stopped. That was his cue to leave the room, with his client's time used up, and he forced his way off the gator's lap, hoping he wouldn't ask for extra time. He didn't even bother looking his way, wanting to get as far away from him as possible; had he done so, however, he would've perhaps been able to keep the man from reaching his arm and pulling him down. No matter the surprising level of strength he must have had to get a man the size of Razul to trip over, what got the dragon was the way the old gator planted his lips and forced a kiss on him; the audacity, the roughness, the taste of booze in his mouth... It was all intoxicating, disgustingly so.

"A quick one for the road, hottie," he said in that rugged, grave voice, and Raz had to fight every cell in his body to not knock his teeth off. No hitting customers, right? Especially ones that had given you such big tips... Fucked up mentality necessary to keep the job, and he hated himself more for it. Rather, he gave the gator a half smile and stepped back, never taking his eyes off him until the door closed behind him.

The first thing he did was wipe whatever was left on his mouth. Even if it was ridiculous to think there really was anything left at all, he just wanted it all out of his system. And through gritted teeth, a grunt left his mouth and he stepped away from the room. The furious fire behind his eyes was enough for everyone else to keep away from him, and by the time he reached the back of the club, the changing room had been left empty in his wake. Not like he gave a damn; the more privacy he had, the better. Off were the vest, the hat, the pants, everything! And he was left completely in the buff, back to the wall just to make sure no one would walk up to him.

"Oh damn, full frontal assault now, are we?" despite his best efforts, he was still surprised, but of all people he could've imagined doing it, the purple-dyed canine staring at his naked body from over the divider was at the bottom of his list. Caleb seemed to pick up on it and gave a quick handwave as a greeting before crossing over, casually leaning on the wall and giving the dragon the look over. "Hey."

"Fancy seeing you around," he replied in the most casual, calmed tone he could muster while pulling his shorts up, but noticed his emotions slipping through every word. And immediately, he knew Caleb would pick up on that.

"Just checking on my dad. Everything ok with you?" there was the psychology major. And dammit, Raz didn't need a therapy session right now, so once he finished pulling up the zipper, he had every intention of making his way out. "You're still shirtless," until that, and a quick look down was all it took to notice as much. "Man, your head's not working today, is it?"

"Just...!" once again, he gritted his teeth and walked up to the mirror, quickly finding his jacket. "I just had a nasty client today, ok? You know, the handsy type. You, of all people, should know how that feels."

"You... didn't have to go there," Caleb looked away and Raz knew he hit a sore spot. He'd apologize later, but if it served to keep him down right now, he might as well play the role of the asshole. "I shouldn't pry," spoke too soon, "but that's actually why my dad asked me to come over. He says you've been taking a lot of extra shifts and accepting more private sessions than usual the past few weeks. Not even I took that many when I was working here, but you know, if you need extra cash, you can always talk with him, right?" Raz heard, but in the most obvious way possible chose to ignore his former workmate's words while he counted his money. Lots of big bills, the one hundred included, and so far he had more than what he needed for his budget. Good. Finally, luck was shining on- "Does it have to do with Koku's birthday?"

"What would it have to do with Koku's birthday?" too fast, too specific. He caught on that the moment it left his mouth, one second too late to stop. And of course, Caleb's poker face did very little to hide his own realization. Change the subject fast... He pocketed the money and took the chance to reach for his phone. "Look, I have to go now. Stan is helping me pick up some stuff I'm buying, so I shouldn't keep him waiting."

"I'll go," the speed Raz's neck whipped at the dog would be enough to leave him sore the next day. "We haven't really hung out since I stopped stripping, so why not take the chance? You're obviously going to look for Koku's present, so I might as well do the same. And I can bug Stan about the wedding and maybe, just maybe, get him to actually set a date once and for all. Lots of things to do! Besides, we're family! We gotta stick around for one another!"

"What..." Raz looked at the canine, but he had no way of reading him. Everything, from his expression to his posture was completely neutral. The way he breathed was too natural for him to tell if he was feeling in any way anxious or excited about his choice; hell, even the cream-colored shirt hugging to his muscles! How much more neutral of a color could you get!? On the other hand, he was risking turning into a wreck if he joined them, and that would be far too easy to read, but it's not like he could shoo the dog away and not look suspicious. So, what to do...? "You know what? Sure! Maybe more friends around is what I need to get off this funk!"

The same as always: Smile and hope for the best.

---

A quick ride later and, despite what little hope he actually had for it, he managed to stay in the clear for now. Whether it was thanks to Stan's presence making him tone it down, or if Raz really had enough acting skills to mask his feelings, Caleb's near constant psyche analysis of him had stopped altogether. Rather than the barrage of questions to avoid that he had been expected, Raz was surprised to see him put most of his focus on the green avian, badgering about his wedding just like he had assured him he would. Even now, as they were right in front of him, going through piles of racked up shirts, the canine continued his attack, with Stan's face turning into a mix of anxiety and exasperation. He almost felt bad for him.

"Lord, it's cold!" but he was feeling too bad about himself for that. Even inside a shop in the mall, with the heating no doubt at full power, he could feel himself grow slower; reptiles weren't meant for this weather.

"If you're so cold, why don't you wear actual winter clothes?" he recognized his brother's deep voice, but refused to look up at the green avian, knowing his powerfully built body was hidden beneath a thick black coat that only added to the attractively dark, noir-film aura he projected just by existing. And to make matters worse, next to him was Caleb in his own white jacket and scarf, tail wagging from the heat, as he had explained to Raz repeatedly just to spite him. Damn them.

"Excuse you, but will you look at this?" and he proceeded to flex like crazy, showing off the thickness of his arms, puffing out his already prominent chest, mildly tempted to unzip and bounce them for a while just for the extra bragging points, had it not been for the cold. Yes, the cold; not the fact that they were in public. "I can't just keep these babies away from the world; there are tons of gays out there that deserve- that _need_these muscles in their lives!"

"I don't like winter clothes either, and I'd much rather just go to the south for vacations, like the Bahamas or something, like my bird instincts tell me to, but Joey likes staying here and visit his dad for Christmas, which means I have to wear all of this over my feathers just to fight off this damn cold, because I'm fucking in love, so if I can man up and be an adult about it, then so can you, dammit, instead of whining like a child."

"...Someone needed that vent," Caleb said and right after Stan took a single, deep breath, followed by a pat on the back. "You know, you can always time the wedding so you guys go to the Bahamas for your honeymoon during winter. You'll get at least a week of beach heat."

"You're right, I could do that and release myself from this wretched cold. But then I would have to time the wedding near the end of autumn, can we wear autumn colors for that? I'm sure it would mix in well with my feathers' green, but if I want it by the end, then everything would be mostly gray. Maybe I can stretch it all the way to early winter and have a snow theme, Joey's fur would look so good in a white suit, but it wouldn't really fit me. But then again, do I want the beach heat to disappear right after we come back to the cold? We should go around the summer instead so the honeymoon feeling extends after we come back, that's the key to a healthy marriage, according..." they couldn't hear the rest of his rambling as he slowly drifted elsewhere into the store.

"Why do you torture him like this? He's already enough of a nervous wreck."

"It's fun," was all Caleb could reply, his tail still furiously wagging, just in time for the bird to randomly scream 'TULIPS!' and getting nearby customers to slowly walk away while averting their eyes. Bursting out in laughter, Raz had to admit the canine had a point, right before going back to his mission: searching, among these piles of clothes, something his roommate would appreciate. "Why clothes?" when he realized Caleb was still talking to him, he looked up in curiosity; rather than the same sadistic glee he had been poorly hiding while toying around with Stan, he had returned to the same neutral expression as before. Raz figured it would be safer to remain quiet. "Wouldn't he prefer art supplies or something?"

"Actually, he doesn't like it when other people buy him art supplies, because they never get the few right stuff that he still uses. He does everything digital now, so at best I would be getting him a few new sketchbooks and pens for whenever he's bored outside or something. But he really does like clothes! Just gotta get him the right thing; something fancy enough, like a vest, or maybe with a cute magic circle pattern, he loves those things."

"You're smiling," that took Raz by surprise and he even reached up for his snout. Caleb's weight was already pushing him down by the time he tried to, however, and the purple arms surrounded and pulled him into a tight hug. "Whenever you start talking about Koku, you have the same look as Stan when he thinks about his wedding. It's actually kind of endearing. Makes sense you would let so many guys grope you that bad for the extra cash."

"You're still on about that, man?" a cocky grin appeared in his snout, and to make it clear who was in charge of the situation, he reached around and grabbed the canine's buttocks, getting a shocked yelp out of him. That was a sound you rarely heard from him, and he was sure going to enjoy it. "That was just my job! Which, as you just noticed, I'm amazing at! Getting guys horny and stuff, I can feel it against my thigh. I'll give you some extra service on the house, just because we're family," and he turned up the charm, ass grinding against Caleb's growing bulge, getting a huff from the dog in response.

"God, you're doing it again," his hands landed on the dragon's hips and held him in place, pushing forward, bulge pressed against his bubble butt, reaching for his neck until Raz could feel his breath on his skin. "You know... It's pretty easy to tell between the real smiles and the fake ones."

"What," he couldn't see it, but his smile faltered for a second, right before he pulled it back up, with a bit of a chuckle to boot. "What are you talking about, man?"

"He's not wrong, you know?" that was Stan, who had returned after his mild breakdown, and was now leaning on the other side of the rack. "You know, let's just put all out cards on the table once and for all: You have feelings for Koku- don't give me that look, everyone knows, it's incredibly obvious -you have feelings for him, but you can't bring yourself to tell him, for some weird reason that doesn't keep you from flirting with almost every hot guy that walks in front of you, including him, which only makes it even weirder, and now you're letting yourself be harassed over a crush? I get you like him, and I love Koku, he's great, but he's not going to return your f-

Stan never got to finish that sentence. His words were caught in his throat with the shock of the dragon breaking off from Caleb's hold, turning his back to the other two. In the near future, they would both comment on how his back seemed to get wider at that moment, growing larger with every heavy intake of air. But the most surprising thing of all was when he turned back to them, with a large grin plastered on his lips.

"Dude, the hell are you talking about?" he laughed. "Crushing on Koku? Seriously? Come on, man. I mean... He's great, sweet and stupid hot, it has to be said! But he's way too much of a friend for that. Besides, he has a boyfriend; I'm a horny fuck, but I'm no homewrecker," and to mark his words, he tossed a shirt back on the rack. "Anyway, can't find anything good in this dump. Might as well check some other places, right?"

"Raz," Stan tried, but his brother was soon out of the door, hands on his pockets and if he was hearing right, whistling on his way out. "Raz! Son of a bitch, doesn't he realize the effort I'm putting in caring about him?" that got a chuckle from Caleb, who received a quick glance before the bird stormed out in pursuit of the dragon. "Raz! We need to ta-

"These are good, right?" Stan was shut down when a large pretzel was literally shoved in his mouth, and once he fought off the initial shock, he looked at the crimson drake grinning at him while chewing on his own. "Got one for you too, Caleb. Food! When you're in a mall, fattening yourself up while walking and seeing through the windows at all the expensive stuff you want and will never have is a must!"

"Other than the fact..." Stan started when he finally swallowed, right before taking another bite that immediately cut off his train of thought. Caleb, next to him, followed through, and neither of them wanted to admit how much they had fallen into Raz's description. "Ok, let's ignore the fact that you're literally using food as a coping mechanism to ignore talking about your problems, but we won't stop; you can't expect us to just pretend like there's nothing wrong."

"You're awfully chatty today, man. What if I want you to pretend?" he notably kept looking forward as he said that, only turning over when another store caught his eye, almost spitting the mouthful of food in excitement. "Ah! Games! You can't go wrong with those!"

And he practically skipped like an overactive child towards the window, browsing with mad glee through them. One had to wonder if he was looking for a gift to his roommate or himself. Stan and Caleb, however, didn't bother following him, left dumbfounded by his words.

"...What's your professional opinion?"

"Oh, this goes a lot deeper than everyone thinks," the purple dog stated, his voice getting the tiniest bit muffled as he bit on his own treat. "No one I mean, no one gets this bad over a simple crush; it's a lot more than that. It's not that he's too stubborn to admit it, it's that he doesn't want to be reminded. He probably already convinced himself that it won't happen, and it bothers him when other people tell him to do it because it _might_happen," the bird's quiet, fierce gaze never left Raz, and he just nodded in response to the canine's words. "You know, he's right. You're not usually this nosy. Or this verbal either, you're going out of character."

"Didn't I say it before?" a clearly exhausted Stan sighed, rubbing his temples. "You can't expect me to see m brother going through all of this and not do anything about it. I'm not a monster, I worry about my family."

"Hmmm... You've changed."

"I know. So have you. So have," he stopped for a second, seeing the dragon return with a defeated expression, "most of us..."

"What the fuck... Games are expensive now, man," and he proceeded to fall on top of the bird, causing him to drop his pretzel to the floor. Raz heard the angry yell, but didn't pay it any mind, too preoccupied with beating himself up to care. "It's impossible. I'm too poor for the right things and can only afford wrong ones. I'm the worst friend! I should be punished with chastity. Man, that sounds so hot; bro-

"You're not using any of my chastity cages again," and he quickly shoved the dragon away, making Raz put on a desperate pout to try and gain his favor. Rather, all he got was a short struggle that ended with his own pretzel stolen by the green avian, before he continued with a bit. "If you're so blank about what to get him, just do what I do: Stop trying to get him something meaningful and nice, and just go for something functional."

"Oh, yeah! That's a good idea! You know, since Gui never really wants anything, I always just get him something he needs, like new gardening tools. Or buttsex."

"I can't offer Koku buttsex!" he stopped, blank eyes staring forward. "...Nah, I can't. But... No, I really can't," he laughed, but he could already feel how unconvinced the other two men were. "Functional, though... Something like a keychain?"

"You're only saying that because it's the first store you saw, aren't you?" but by the time Stan finished saying as much, the dragon had already walked past him and was entering the shop behind him. A quick sigh left the avian's beak and for the smallest of seconds, he considered just leaving him alone, but their canine friend following him with a grin of his own was enough to finish convincing him. "Fine. Gotta start somewhere, I guess."

From the outside, with its shining front window and luscious presentation, the store could fool any passerby as your regular cute, hip franchise, crammed with random curiosities and everyday knickknacks made weirder, like World's Okayest Dad coffee mugs, or, to the dragon's shock, a rather wide selection of colorful sketchbooks; and of course, quite the number of adorable keychains down on the counter, more than one already catching his attention. Once inside, however, he was pleasantly surprised of how much more the shop had to offer; from flower vases and photo frames, to multiple scented candles and a whole shelf dedicated only to rings he could easily picture the ghost going crazy over, he was suddenly convinced he had found the right place to get his present.

But even better still was the way his friends had started drifting away to their own browsing the moment they stepped inside, leaving him alone for a change. Thank the lord, because the last thing he needed was even more prodding regarding feelings he may or may not feel for someone else. All he asked was a moment of quiet to find a proper gift for his oldest friend; he couldn't understand why they, or anyone else, would try and look so deeply into it. Besides... he wasn't that obvious, was he?

No! Why go there when he had more important things in front of him? Things like the, once again, wide selection of sketchbooks! He said functional, and what was more functional for an artist than one of those? Something dark, with weaving patterns, things that could come out of a wizardry book or a magical girl anime, those were Koku's style, he knew that... because of the many other ones that were constantly left lying around the house, in the living room, the kitchen, sometimes in his own room, leaving him to wonder why the ghost had been drawing there! He said he found it comfortable because it smelled like the dragon, and he couldn't fathom how something so ridiculous could sound so wholesome; he was a slutty, sweaty mess, and he was sure his room was the same, how could anyone be comforted by that? But damn, he could practically melt with happiness over that.

Ah...! The point is! The ghost had too many sketchbooks already, and Raz had already flipped through enough of them to know that, despite the hundreds of drawings, some steamier than others, they were all still far from being filled up. Bottomline, he needed no more. Functional... The rings were right there, in front of him, and more than one fit the ghost's style perfectly. One shaped like a green snake practically jumped at Raz to buy it! But accessories weren't what first came to mind when you thought about functionality, and even if they were, it was likely he would be a bit off his budget if he tried to go for one of them. That and the whole implied message of gifting someone with a ring-

"Raz," of course, he jumped back, his voice reaching a pitch much higher than he was willing to admit. Of all things he could've asked for, being surprised when his mind was going to that kind of place... he'd much rather be caught while jerking off! At least that would be expected of him! But instead he was in front of his brother, trying his best to not make even more of a fool of himself. "You've been staring at the rings for a while. I thought you were choosing one, but you weren't moving your eyes. Are you sure you don't want to talk?"

"Dude, don't look whether or not I move my eyes, that's creepy," and Stan immediately looked away. That was a sore spot, he knew as much, and taking the chance he tried to slip away, until the bird's words stopped him. "You know, rings aren't exactly functional. And giving one is-

"I know they're not, but they look good, and Koku likes them," he said. And both, he and Stan knew he said it to stop the bird from his next thought. And even though he hoped it would work as intended, he noticed the bird about to keep talking, like the unstoppable force he was. "But you know, rings actually do have one very specific use. You would know about that, wouldn't you?"

That, however, was Stan's unmovable object; his absolute wall, which sent him completely rigid the moment those words reached his ears, and forced him to cover the ring in his hand. For a second, Raz could even swear his feathers had turned dull, suddenly losing their shine, at the same time his eyes went dark, and even felt guilty for a moment when he walked away, mumbling about catering services. But alas, it was necessary, or at least he thought as much when he saw Caleb reach for the half-dead avian. Even better, that would keep him away as well. With any luck, he could go back to just looking for something on his own, without any unwanted distractions.

And as luck would have it, the moment he turned around, his eyes were immediately drawn towards a nearby desk, where several different wallets were lined up. Wallets, of all things! He just needed one look and he instantly remembered the ghost's own, literally falling apart in front of his eyes. Why didn't he throw it out? Because he gave it to him? Then what would be better than this as a present? Functional! And he had so much to choose from, it was practically meant to be. It was so widely varied of a show: Plain black leather, easily fitting the ghost's tastes; some with waves in different cold pastel colors, so soft they were already relaxing him- Seriously, how much effort could go into a wallet?

But the one that won him over was around the corner. A dark purple covered in a web-like pattern; or rather, on closer inspection, a sort of glyph he recognized from one of the shows Koku had suggested him before. Naguma, or something... Either way, it was perfect for him.

"Here!" he yelled on the counter, surprising his two companions when he slammed his purchase in front of the cashier. "I'm taking this one!"

"A wallet?" the other two wondered in unison. "For your crush?"

"It's not a crush, it's functional!"

---

With that episode over, Raz wanted nothing more than go home, give his roommate his present, get yet another one of his tight, warm hugs, and sink in bed, preferably with him still in his arms... Before remembering he was most likely with his own boyfriend, eating and thinking about doing the exact same thing, and more through the night. It was... He decided not to think about it, and instead sank into the passenger's seat while Stan drove through the night. Despite his insistence in staying with them for a while longer, no doubt out of a sadistic need to keep teasing him like crazy, Caleb had to go back to his own home and relationship; and living so far into the city, the way back from his place was bound to be a long, awkwardly silent one, mainly due to the fact that Raz wasn't feeling like saying anything if it could mean his words would be twisted against him.

Stan thought he was helping him, as if he needed someone else to tell him how he felt; he was handling it his own way, that was all. Why couldn't he let him be? And his own way was being as nice a friend as he could be; to white knight the ghost if necessary. That just happened to include spoiling him like crazy with things like extravagant decorations and cakes for a dinner with another man. He had chosen that, after all. As long as Koku was happy...

"Raz," he was certain whatever came out of his beak now would some sort of admonishing, a friendly warning, an ultimatum- anything that made Stan think he was guiding him in the right direction. Bullshit. He just wanted to be left alone with his feelings; hearing people coming up with better ways for him to handle things was annoying. Annoyance that was sure to show in his face if he didn't cover it up with one of his trademark smiles. But by the time he turned around, the bird was already opening the door, and the smile gave way to confusion. "We're here, man."

He whipped back and understood his brother's words. At what point they had reached his old man's house, he had no idea, but seeing it made him remember that, if his roommate would spend the night with his boyfriend, he had to stay someplace else, right? Which is why, as he got off the car, he remembered asking their parents if he could stay the night in his old room. He mentioned that to the ghost earlier, didn't he? That seemed like a while back... But enough of that! He had to put on a good face for his father to see, else he might feel the need to prod in his business, much like the bird was insisting on.

Stan knocked on the door by the time the dragon reached him, and a bit of hustling coming from inside was all the warning they got before the door opened. Standing on the frame was an old version of the bird, graying feathers ruffled in every direction as if he had just woken up; an eternal look of tiredness that came with age, as Raz always assumed. Not like that stopped him from being incredibly large for his age! Seriously, Raz would kill to reach his golden years with such massive build, pecs jumping from the window left open by his tank and just begging to be groped, coupled with arms like freaking tree trunks. Overall, Arden was massive! But that did very little to diminish the almost childishly gleeful light that appeared in his wizened eyes when he saw the two young men standing on his door.

"Son!"

"Dad!" Raz replied, and almost immediately fell on the older bird's open arms, giving him his own hug as well, pulling him tightly, secretly melting with the contact alone, feeling their chests grind against one another; but despite the age and his own attempts at getting advantage, Arden soon enough had him in a tighter hold, forcing him to loosen his own and admit defeat.

"Why do you keep doing that?" both, Raz and Arden, looked at the frowning Stan, who had simply stood there, giving them a disapproving stare while they remained in one another's arms, and just to spite him, they pulled tightly against one another again. The bird simply sighed and rubbed his temples before pushing his father and stepbrother away to make his way into the house. "Where is Rigor, I could use a real adult to talk to right now."

"Let them have their fun, child," a deeper voice came from another room, and soon, a tall, bulky red dragon entered the room, scratching the thick beard while drying off long, thin trickles of sweat from his own large chest, bare to the elements and open for all three sets of eyes to fall on it. Of course, Raz wouldn't feel guilty upon staring at his birth father's chest with lust; they were all adults here, after all, and he'd have to be a fool to not enjoy the sheer size of those muscles, but he was still beaten over the thirst Arden gave them. He was soon let off the bird's grasp, and would've betted his ass that it was to head for that large chest, but Rigor walked past him, casually ignoring the groping hands, to give his son a hug. "Nice to see you, kid," and as soon as he said that, he let go as well, despite how much Raz wanted to melt over his muscles, and how many urges he had to just keep him in place and get off his own shirt in the process.

"Just to be clear, we all know Raz is checking you out, right?" the poor dragon whipped at his brother with a deep blush that managed to shine even through his scales, not only out of shame but also fear that he was such an easy book for the bird to read, which only got worse when both older men nodded in agreement. Realizing his arousal had been so readily exposed, Raz simply gave up and nodded as well, getting yet another sigh from Stan. Seriously, how could he breath when he sighed so much? "What are you doing shirtless anyway?"

"It's my house! You should be grateful I bothered to put pants on! Not like I hear any complaints when I don't," and a loud spank right on Arden's bum, which got them both to put out hearty laughter. Of course, Raz joined them, only getting yet another sigh from Stan before a quick flex from the older dragon got their attention again. "But if you really need to know, we were about to start working out. Well, I was, at least; broke a sweat with a bit of quick cardio. Not sure if this old lug here is planning on joining me, though."

"What? You think I got this size by standing still? I have to put some effort if I want to keep you interested," and rather than a spank to follow up, Arden walked up to his husband and gave his ass a rough, tight grope that almost got a yelp out of the otherwise composed man. By now, Stan's sighing had turned into grunting, while Raz had an excited grin on his face.

"I wanna work out too! I haven't gone to the gym all week!" right after saying that, he unzipped and his jacket fell unceremoniously, leaving his torso completely exposed to the house's warmth; and no one, especially not him, failed to notice the effect the cold had left on his nipples all through the day, but a couple bounces showed that he wasn't against it in the least; hell, the only thing stopping him from twisting them right there was the risk of getting Stan to beat him over it, but he still walked over to his parents, arms falling heavily on their shoulders, and the three made their way together further into the house, leaving the younger bird alone to groan and surrender, following suit.

As for Raz, he never stopped being amazed by his father's personal gym: what had formerly been Arden's barely used basement, serving only as a mere storage room for all the 'random crap he had hoarded over the years', as he would put it, had been turned into a fully illuminated room filled from one wall to the other with the latest equipment the old man could afford. Chest and shoulder presses, treadmills by the wall, racks full of dumbbells and a myriad of other things he didn't recall the names of; but his eyes were immediately drawn to the weights, and before anyone could say anything, he was already running down the stairs and lying down on the bench, confident he could take his father's usual numbers with ease.

"Dad! Spot for me! I need it, I miss the chest burning from lifting!" he yelled in the most frat bro voice anyone in his family had ever heard before, and this time two sets of sighs, the new one undoubtedly from his father, reached his ears before he recognized the dragon's thick thigs to both sides of his head.

"You know you need a lot of things other than lifting, right? Number one, stretching," Rigor insisted, or at least tried to, but found his will slowly breaking in front of his son's puppy eyes. "You have learned a lot from the ghost, I see. Fine. But don't come whining when you pull something," he said, and his son took it as cue to get his first shot in, not without feeling the familiar pressure start to set in on his chest, and gravity push against his arms. "Taking you more than usual. Why haven't you gone to the gym anyway?"

"He's been too busy whoring himself out at work," Stan started from the corner while he and Arden did stretch, and Raz's eyes bugged out while the weight almost fell on him, stopped only by his father's hands. Seeing that happen wasn't enough for the bird to stop. "Taking extra shifts and more private shows, letting clients get a bit more handsy on him, you know. He wanted the extra money to buy Koku a birthday party."

"I mean, he's a stripper, I can't say I expect him to keep his pants on. Don't stop," he added at the end when Raz was clearly about to put the weights back, but the harsh trainer tone his father used was enough to discourage that idea, and he was left pushing against them again, unable to say anything to defend himself from the upcoming assault. "But you know, if you need money, you can always ask me for it, I don't mind; I certainly would prefer that over my son getting manhandled by perverts."

"I like... getting... manhandled!" he pushed after every rep until he had no choice but to drop the weights back on the rack, feeling his biceps grow heavy from the effort. "Fuck, I'm sore! My arms are killing me, I need a massage," and before anyone could offer him one, he sat up and looked at Stan. "How do you even know that anyway?"

"Caleb told me," the bird said from the bench, his own presses giving him no difficulty to speak, unlike Raz's own exercise, and he mentally cursed the dog for his lack of discretion, as well as his brother for rubbing his own strength on his face. "And you only like getting manhandled when you can reciprocate; if anyone here knows that, it's me. You just wanted the cash to buy something big and fancy for Koku because you like him- don't give me that look, I told you everyone already knows."

"Everyone knows, son. It's been pretty obvious since you were kids," to his surprise, it was Arden who said that; and if even someone as detached from the situation as him could tell, then his anger at being discovered was misplaced. "You know, I was really cheering for you back then, you guys would've made a lovely couple. But every year I saw you feeling fine with the best friend role until you graduated, he got a boyfriend and you missed your chance. That actually inspired me to ask your dad out because..."

Because I didn't want to be friendzoned for the rest of my life like you. That was clearly what Arden meant before stopping himself. And while it made Raz's blood boil, he couldn't really blame him for it. Knowing he would fail at keeping his factions soft, he stood up, back turned to the rest of his family, and walked over to a bar where he started doing pull-ups. The effort and the pressure he got from the pump were enough to at least distract him from the guilt of blatantly ignoring them.

"You can pretend you can't hear us all you want, but we'll keep talking," he heard Stan saying, followed by the older bird's deeper voice getting grunting, no doubt from his own effort in the same press. "You want my two cents? You need to move on. And for that, you need to tell him."

"Wow! Hang on!" this time the grunt came from his father as the weights fell loudly on the rack. "He can't just tell him! They've been friends forever; of course he doesn't want that to end, and going to your best friend and telling him 'Hey, I've been in love with you for almost two decades' is the kind of thing that creeps people out. He says it, and it just throws a wrench in their friendship," at least someone could see it from where he was standing; if anything, that was reassuring. "What he needs to do is get over it on his own so he can move in with his life, maybe with someone else. I'm not saying he should sleep around, because that clearly didn't work, so he should start dating someone else so he can figure things out," suddenly, it stopped being reassuring.

"Basically, you're telling him to get a rebound guy?" Arden picked up from where his husband left it, and Raz just wished they'd stop already. "Well, ignoring the fact that's unfair to the rebound in question, those never work. At best, he'll be in a crappy relationship that will slowly dwindle out because he didn't really get over his issues, and he can't stop thinking about Koku. At worst, he'll get dumped over the same thing and get his heart broken twofold. He has to tell him, and the two of them had to deal with it together, like adults."

"And what happens when Koku starts feeling uncomfortable around him because of it? At first he'll say it's fine, but things won't be the same, they'll start talking less, avoiding one another in the house, and before you know it, one of them is moving out. Or worse, what if he leaves his boyfriend for him?" of all things, Raz felt a tinge of hope the moment he heard that, and started pulling faster to clear his head of those thoughts. As if he wanted to be a homewrecker. "Then he feels guilty over breaking them up and that keeps him from having a relationship with him."

"What's with you getting all bleak? They're adults! They're mature enough to deal with this without burning the bridges. Besides, your big solution is bottling it all up and look for a substitute? Might as well tell him to go for another purple guy, then! Either that, or wait until they break up on their own and swoop in, like a knight in shining armor, and save the ghost from being single. Wait for something that probably won't happen, or resign himself to half-assed relationships doomed to failure: That's your great fatherly advice here."

"My fatherly advice would be to tell them to stop living together, but I can't-

"Shut up!"

And indeed, they all shut up. The only noise left in the room was the yell still echoing, still bouncing off the walls and vibrating on the bars, slowly diminishing, yet refusing to die out. And Raz remained still, his back to his family. He didn't need to see them to know what was going on: Arden and Rigor were staring at him, their eyes growing concerned at his outburst, yet too shocked to say anything; and Stan was looking with the same unflinching expression he always had, noticing the way his back seemed to become broader while he leaned on the equipment, the thick layer of cold sweat covering him being caused by his emotions rather than the physical effort. None of that mattered; the one thing that caught Raz's attention the most were his own eyes, where a few tears had already started flowing. When the fuck did that happen? Wiping a single one and staring at his wet fingers wasn't enough to make him believe it had actually happened. But it was enough to make his teeth grit and wipe the rest on his forearm as fast as possible.

"You know what, this was a bad idea," he said, still refusing to look at anyone in the eye, even when he started heading for the stairs. "I don't feel like myself right now. I think I'll just go home," and he wouldn't stop, despite his father's yells. Until...

"You're just running away then?"

That was enough to make him look up. Stan, also shirtless, stared at him from his leaning position against the wall. And Raz's reaction was grabbing him by the fluff of his collarbone with a snarl so aggressive, it seemed out of place in his face. The two older men immediately rose, but Stan gestured them to stop, his eyes remaining quiet, never breaking away from his brother. So, what now, Raz asked himself, as he sank on those black pools that were the avian's pupils. Was he supposed to punch him or something? What's up with that? What am I doing...

His eyes went down. His shoulders slumped. His frown lessened... And he just ran upstairs before anyone could say anything else.

---

"Fuck... Fucking Stan. Fucking Caleb. Fucking dad. Fuck, why is it so cold?"

He crossed his arms, trying to hug himself in a futile attempt to keep the cold off his scales. He wasn't made for the cold. Why on Earth did he think going out with so little on was a good idea? Here he was now, shaking after hours of wandering the streets with not even the moonlight to keep him company. No cars, barely any lights on, nothing but freezing desolation as far as the eye could tell. Even now, in his own neighborhood, there was nothing but darkness; of course, he wasn't expecting a parade to receive him home, but this was just the cherry on top of a crappy day. A quick check on his phone and he realized it was around 11:30. On a weekday. No wonder everyone had gone to bed already.

Everyone but two of them, he was sure. At this hour, they would probably still be up, maybe eating the cake, maybe pounding away on the kitchen counter. It was still his birthday, so he had every right to... What did they know? Everyone telling him to move on, to find someone else, to put his feelings out there so he could get over them; everyone judging him for running away, for settling with being a side character. What the hell did they know? Telling him how to be in lo-

"Fuck..." how long had he tried burying those things only for them to come haunting him back every time he so much as thought about them.

He almost missed his own house in the darkness. With no light coming from the windows, it sank seamlessly with the black surrounding it. Good. It meant they were already in bed, so he could avoid running into them while dating. Or fucking. He wasn't sure which one would be more awkward or painful. But no, he was lucky today; he had been lucky all day. A single day of luck amidst a near constant struggle to hide his feelings, to keep them from bursting out in front of his roommate and just break apart everything they had built over the years. The cruel irony of it being on his birthday didn't escape him. That was painful enough, he didn't need the cold to add to it; he yearned for his bed and a good night's rest, if laden with moans from the other side of his wall. At least he was having a good time, right?

He opened the door and, just as he expected, there was nothing but darkness inside. Not a single light to speak of, just the veil of the night over the furniture, the cake, the untouched dinner- And that was the first sign. The second was the dim, almost imperceptible glimmer of the television screen, as black as the rest of the room, but still evidently on. Already predicting what was going on, Raz closed the door behind him as silently as possible and crept up to the couch. And just as he predicted, there was the ghost, in all his purple glory, having bothered to put fancier clothes just for his boyfriend. And there was an empty bottle of wine in his hand.

"Koku..." he whispered. Not in disappointment, but in pity. And gently shook the ghost's shoulder. "Time to wake up, pal."

"Hrgh?" was the groggy answer he received as the lump of purple flesh started to stir into awareness, followed by several grunts and two pair of bright red eyes blinking unevenly to adjust to the darkness. Funny how he was so conscious about the extra two when sober. But soon enough, he started focusing on the dragon. "Hey... What are you doing here so early?" and he didn't wait for an answer to hug his roommate.

"I..." was he supposed to tell him what happened? Not like there was much of a point, given how intoxicated he seemed. Rather, he rubbed his back while reaching for the bottle, keeping it out of his reach just in case. "Never mind that. What's up with you? Where's Chark?"

"Working! The bastard! I hate him!" he buried his face on the dragon's stomach before starting to mumble again. "No, I don't. I love him. But I'm mad at him. Why is he at work instead of here, with me? Jerk. But I get it. But also, I wanna be mad at him. And I am. But I can't. But I want to and I am. And I'm drunk, and mad, and sad, and I hate him, and he's an ass, and I love him," talk about blabbering, but through all of it Raz stood still, listening, still rubbing his back reassuringly. "I know I'm being selfish, but I just wish he was here for me."

I would be here for you. I'm here for you.

...Of course, he couldn't say that. No matter how badly he wanted to. No matter how much he felt it would be enough to get his oldest, dearest friend to feel better, he couldn't bring himself to say it. But was he supposed to just spend the night watching him cry like this?

"...Why don't you go to his place then?" a couple sobs were all he got at first, before the ghost looked up with a weird face at the suggestion. Raz couldn't keep from snickering at how cute he looked. "Yeah! They won't keep him there all night, so you can always surprise him in bed or something. You know, get to his place, strip, cover only the right bits with the sheet, get your freak going! Trust me, dragons love that shit. You're not that drunk; one bottle? If what your dad told me about last Christmas party is true, that's barely enough to get you tipsy. But just to be on the safe side, I'll even pay your Uber."

"What the hell?" Koku looked at his roommate as his mind started clearing up, just in time to stop him after he pulled his phone up. "Raz, stop. You don't have to... You've done so much for me today. You do so much for me all the time, I'd think you have a crush on me."

"Pfft, right! Like you could handle this much meat," and just like he was known to do, Raz started flexing, showing off his massive. Hard-earned muscles to a wide-eyed ghost while trying his best not to let out how much he wanted to kiss him right now. "You're a friend. The best one I could ask for. I'm obviously gonna help you any way I can, and if that includes paying a stranger to get you to break into your boyfriend's place so you can get some dick, then you can be damn sure I will! And look at that, there's one nearby! Like, literally around the corner! It's a sign, man. Take it."

"How..." and just as he uttered that, a bright light blinded him from outside, filtering in by the window, along with the gentle rumble of an engine in front of their house. The ghost felt his jaw fall at how fast everything started moving, but all it took was a single glance at his roommate's grin for his confidence to boost. "You know what? You're right! I should do this! I will do this!" and with new decision, he stood on the couch, jumped over, fell face first on the floor and stood up again without missing a beat. "Ah, I don't have any money."

"I just told you, I'll pay. Here," he said with another smile and pulled the remaining cash from his back pocket. For a moment, he was thankful the ghost was this intoxicated; under ideal circumstances, he would be badgering him with questions about the money, teasing him about how big of a deal he was in the club, and eventually figuring out what happened simply because he couldn't bring himself to lie to him. But right now he was simply pulling out the old, crusty wallet he insisted on keeping, opening it to get the money in place, and only then did Raz realize. "Hey, didn't that thing break off this morning? You should really throw that out."

"I fixed it! I'm not throwing this out! It's important because you gave it to me! It's the only gift of yours I still use, and I still love it so much, I'm never throwing it away," he said with such warmth that Raz's heart almost skipped a beat. And just when he was sure it couldn't get any cuter, he went and gave him one more hug. "You're the best, you know that? You'll make a guy real happy someday."

"I'm making a guy happy today, that's enough for now. But thanks," he answered with his usual cheerfulness, before turning Koku over and patting him on the butt, getting a chuckle out of him. The ghost opened the door and turned around one last time, just long enough to wave him goodbye, before closing behind him in the same fashion he had done in his way in, and a few seconds later, the lights were already drifting off into the night, leaving the dragon in darkness again. Perfect to keep his faltering smile hidden.

Left alone with nothing but his thoughts and the winter cold, he left for his room, locking the door behind him just for good measure. Deep breath in, deep breath out. He pulled the new wallet he had bought for his friend while stepping up to his bed, sitting while his eyes looked it over, admiring the color, so close to his skin, the way the black indents seemed to shine a bit in the dark, bringing to mind the crimson eyes that often did the same... And he threw it across the room, biting his lower lip to keep the scream from leaving his throat.

He wanted to break something. To trash the whole room. To tear down the walls and punch everything in his way, tear the furniture apart with his bare hands, throw everything out of the windows, set the whole place on fire, pull trees off the ground and throw them in other people's houses all night long, and just roar while tearing himself open. But no. He sat in his bed, looking at the floor, lamenting himself over how pathetic he was, and feeling the chill of the night crawl up his spine. More than anything, he wanted him to be there, to hold him through the night. Or anyone, for that matter. Any guy would do to ease himself.

But all he did was stand up, walk over to the door and grab the discarded wallet, gently dusting it off, hoping it was still intact and presentable enough to give it to his roommate in the morning, with a goofy smile on his face ready to meet his hungover scowl. And he went back to his bed, pulling off everything he was wearing and slipping under the sheets, holding the wallet against his chest, no doubt looking ridiculous. It still was cold.