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I'm laying on my back on a bed/table with my foot paws in stirrups about to give birth to a big, full term Lion cub. I know, I know, it sounds off to me too. But it's true. I'm 19, a male Lion, huge bellied, and I'm about to give birth. Where's the father, you might ask? (Well, its not the first question you'd probably ask, but it's the one I'm going to answer. And I'm not willing to deal yet with the How or Why of it.)

He's a big, gorgeous Russian born Lion named Boris Ivanovitch. We had an affair that lasted for about 2 months before he disappeared. I loved him so much that I begged him to take my cherry. Little did we know that last time we made love, and I let him barb fuck me what would happen.(I'd never been barb fucked before as I was a virgin. I had only been with Boris so far when he did me.) I didn't know that I was a hermaphrodite, and had internal female parts. Dr Wallace says I was probably pregnant before he even pulled out of me. His barbing me made me drop an egg right off as soon as he'd raked me a few times.. I had cramps right before he came, but who knew? He'd already fucked me three times that day. My egg dropped into my uterus which was already filled with his thick and very fertile Leonine semen. It got swarmed over and fertilized immediately Dr Wallace thinks. (Like a Feline Female I ovulate when barbed. My little ovaries shoot out an egg immediately unless I'm on the pill)

Three and a half months later, I woke up puking my guts out and it lasted for two weeks. Nigel teased me about being pregnant and the Feline home pregnancy kit he bought me as a joke came out positive when I used it. I ran crying to Dad and he took me to see Dr Wallace. He's specialized in male births. Which are oddly enough becoming more common, for reasons unknown to science. All the tests he does confirm that I have a big Lion fetus in me. Since I have slept with no one but Boris, I know it's his. Dad's thrilled though. When Dr Wallace gives us the test results, Dad's got a big grin on his face. "I never thought I'd ever have a Grandcub" he says ecstatically. "It's Boris' cub?" Dad asks. I nod. He liked Boris a lot so he's even happier now.(Dad saw a lot of himself in Boris and he was proud that I loved him. I had told him I loved Boris but I had yet to tell Boris when he disappeared. He knew though, he knew I loved him.)

When I found out I had his son in me, I started seriously looking for him. But no one has seen or heard from my Boris Ivanovitch since the last time I saw him. Dad had 'the girls' look for him, since they work on retainer for him. Even they can't find my Boris. I'd miss him even if I wasn't about to spew forth his son from my loins. He was a beautiful and loving Big Lion and I'd of bonded him if he hadn't disappeared on me.

Boris Ivanovitch wasn't the sharpest knife in the drawer. He was poorly educated, but he's not stupid. He's big hearted. (And big dicked too.) Boris is 7'3" tall, he's a body builder and he's got to weigh at least 320 pounds. He has the same Golden Tan fur I do, But his mane is darker. Mine is a Red Blond, and his is kind of a Red Brown. His eyes are a beautiful Emerald Green, and mine are Dad's Sapphire Blue eyes. Boris is tall and stocky. His barrel chest is massive and he's very solidly built. Huge dick too. Usual pointed tipped, and barbed Feline Dick. In a size that can only be considered massive, 22". But he took my cherry and was so tender and loving and gentle.

I weep still to think of how he made me feel when he busted my cherry. When he came inside of me, he held me tightly and softly sang me a Russian love song. If I wasn't already in love with him , I would have been after that. (Boris' absence has broken my heart, I don't have a clue how I would cope with him being gone. Without Jamie, his son, I'd just give up on life. Only in therapy could I admit it to myself though. He bonded me the first time we had sex, I don't figure that out for a while. Having Jamie probably saved my life too. It kept me from developing 'wasting syndrome'. An unfulfilled bond causes the bottom to stop eating and lose interest in life. I'd of withered away and died, and only Boris coming back to me would save me. Having his son kept me from getting it. Jamie's been my lifeline in so many ways.)

I too speak Russian, I took it as an elective. I'm considered a genius. I finished Medical School this year, even though I was a pregnant male Lion. I'm going to start my Internship and then my Residency after my son is born. Dad will help me with my son. He's in love with his Grandson already and he's not even born yet. He took me to have my first ultrasound and when Dr Wallace showed him his Grandson on the screen. Dad wept with joy. I was already crying because I heard his little heart beating. I was desperate to have this little cub when I heard his heart beat. Made it so real to me. Boris and I together created a little Lion that was now growing inside of me. Dad was so happy and proud and he told me he'd do all he could to help me have my son.

Papa Harry thinks it's funny. But he's looking forward to being a Grandpa too. Dad's Tiger has always been like a father to me. I love him too. He teases me about being glad it's not contagious. Dad's pressuring him to try, though if Harry doesn't have the parts it'll never happen. He always wanted more sons. And my Momma died birthing me. Only thing that would make Dad happier than me being with his Lion Grandson, would be if Harry was fat with another son from him. Whether it was a Lion or a Tiger, Dad would love it as fiercely as he's loved me.

It's been a hard nine months. Fat and swollen bellied from Boris' huge cub, it's been hard to get around, and I expended a lot of effort and energy just doing day to day things. Let alone having to explain to damn near everyone I met how I got pregnant. And the usual questions when they finally get it. I feel like wearing a sign around my neck saying: "Yes, I'm a male and I'm pregnant", "I do want it", and "No I know who the father is, but not where he is" Animals don't realize how rude they're being. And I keep missing Boris, 'the girls' haven't given up on finding him, and Nigel searches online once a week still. Nige can usually find anything on line, it's a talent he has. But neither he nor Anya and Una can find my Boris.

I'm not worried about after he's born. Our family retainer, Edward has his nephew coming. Gerry wanted to be a nanny but no one would hire him and the family wouldn't send him out. I was glad to get Gerry, when I met him, I thought he was perfect to be our nanny and help me raise my cub.

My best friend and his mate are happy for me. Nigel bonded my Med School mentor, Dr Emil Brunner, a big Walrus. Nigel's a Honey Badger. A lot smaller than Emil. Emil's 6'6' and 300 pounds, and Nige's 5'9" and 165 pounds.

Nigel would tease me unmercifully about being knocked up, until when I reached six months, he started throwing up like I did. He's knocked up too, and he's three months behind me in terms of due date. I can't bring myself to tease him at all. It's not really a laughing matter. And Nigel like me is a bit scared of giving birth to his love's son. Since they're so much bigger than we are. Nigel has a lot more trouble than I do. But he's as determined to have his son as I am to have mine.

Emil's so proud he's gonna be a father. He told me he never knew he wanted a son til he found out he was going to have one. As much smaller as Nigel is he's had it rougher than I did. I'm 6'4" and 225. I am smaller than Boris but not as much as Nigel is to Emil.

I'm having major cramps now, and Dr Wallace is telling me to push with the cramps. He's a big Grizzly. A kind and gentle one. He and his Black Bear lover have become friends with us. And have moved in with us. We have a pair of Russian Bull lovers living with us. They run the gym where I met Boris at. They're also brothers. Dmitri and Yuri Petrov. Big well built Siberian Bulls. Dmitri has Brown fur and Yuri Gray fur. They're both loving, kind, gentle and thoughtful Bulls. And they adore each other. They're amazing Bulls and they make our home a happier place by living with us. (They adore little Jamie and they treat him as if he was theirs. All of our little gay family love Jamie and Emil Jr. They grow up feeling very loved. Jamie misses having his father around, but he won't tell even me. Dad's an amazing Grandfather. Shouldn't have surprised me as he is an amazing Dad too.)

I yowl and it feels like my ass is splitting. "He's crowning" Dr Wallace says smiling. Dad's got a look on his face I've never seen. Pride, happiness, joy, yet mixed with concern for his only son. Quite frankly, I'm amazed this won't rip my asshole wide open. They never told us how elastic it really is in Med school. Two days after Jamie's born, it's as tight as ever.

I yowl again. This kid's now in a rush to be born. I'd tell you more, but truthfully it's a blur of pain, blood, and pushing this Lion cub out of me. I do remember the oddest things though.

My son is out to his knees, and I am struck with wondering where my Boris is. I'm suddenly grateful Dad and Papa Harry insisted on videoing me giving birth. I wish Boris was here. I know now I love him. I've just had his son, and I did it because I love him, even if he's not here, I love him, and I will for life. If he never comes home, I will not mate anyone else. Every day that passes I'll pray for my Russian Lion to come home.(We bonded when he popped my cherry, only my therapist has seen that possibility)

Dr Wallace talked to me about my options. Young, unbonded and pregnant, he reminded me I didn't have to carry it to term. I was horrified, I can't kill my son. (I know Ernie's only being thorough in showing me my options so I'm not upset at him) His cub may be all I'll ever truly have of Boris. And Dad would have freaked if he knew we'd even talked about it. I'll raise it, I can't just get rid of it, like it was just some kind of inconvenience. After I heard his heartbeat per the ultrasound I knew I'd fight anything to have him. I want him desperately, I want to birth my Lion son so badly, even if I never get Boris back. I weep wishing so badly that my Boris was here to see our son enter the world. Though just to know Boris is alive and well would at least be comforting somehow. He's just vanished. INS says he should be here somewhere, as he never left America. He'd have to notify them or they'd get a copy of any passenger manifests with his name on them.

I've never known pain this intense and that spread throughout my entire body. Dad looks so proud. I scream and give one last big push. "He's out, Claude" Dr Wallace says grinning. I pant hard, and when I hear his first cries, I'm weeping even more. "He's truly beautiful, Claude" Dad says with an ear to ear grin.

When I can speak again, I beg for my son. Dr Wallace grins. He gives me my son. Wrapped up in a blanket. He's gorgeous. He looks like a cross between Dad and Boris. He whimpers a bit, and I hold him to my left nipple and he nurses greedily. He's Boris' son alright. Boris had a big appetite, and his son does too. I feel more than I can put into words. This little cub is mine, a part of me, and he's so beautiful. I understand Dad a lot more now. Dad's smiling at us so brightly. I know now, I love my Dad more than even I knew. If he felt for me, what I'm feeling for my newborn son. I weep and Dad takes my paw. "I understand completely, Claude" he says quietly. He smiles. "You were that beautiful when you were born, Claude" he says grinning. "I'm so very proud of my boy now, you've given me a beautiful Lion Grandson" Dad purrs. Harry, on the other paw, though happy for me, he looks really queasy at having watched me give birth.

He whimpers again and I move him to my other nipple. "Claude, do you have a name for him yet?" Papa Harry asks. Our lawyer said I can't give him Boris' last name without his permission. So that kind of settles it for me. Dad, Harry and I may be the only parental figures he has. "I do, meet James Harrison Kitman" I say. Dad weeps. I combined his name and Papa Harry's full first name as the name of my son. Jamie has finished nursing and dropped off to sleep and Dad and Harry take him from me and hold him. I'm exhausted. The afterbirth slides out of me and I feel a sense of relief. I drop off to sleep myself. I've never been this tired.

I wake a bit later when they bring Jamie in for me to feed. He's so calm, he gives me a big smile and begins to nurse greedily. I really wish Boris was here now. Everything about our cub reminds me of him. I say a silent prayer that he is well and comes back to me one day. Til then, I'll raise our son the best I can, I know Dad will help me bring him up right.(I don't know it, but he's already dead. Boris, my Boris died at the very moment his Jamie was fully out of me, somewhere far away in Russia he died as his son was born.. But it's not the end of our love story by a long shot.)

When Jamie finishes nursing, Dad takes him and I try to get up to go to the bathroom. I yowl from the pain in my crotch. "Claude, he broke your pelvis coming out" Dad says softly. I lay back down and ring for my nurse.

After about a week, I get to take Jamie home. Gerry is there already, and he tends me and my son very well. I'm soon recovered and up and around without problems. Dad and Harry spend a lot of time playing with Jamie. Dad's so proud of his Grandson.

I can't really bitch about being a single parent. With Dad and Gerry I don't have a lot to do. But I spend every moment with Jamie I can. Sometimes I feel sad though, I love my son. But he's so much like his father it reminds me I don't know where he is. And I miss him so much. Every night I pray that tomorrow is the day my Boris comes back to me. And one day, I'm going to have to sit down and have a very uncomfortable talk with him about why his father is not here. (I don't end up doing it, Dad does, before I thought Jamie was ready, but he was ready to learn the truth, or as much of the truth as we knew at that point)

Nigel's at 7 months when I have Jamie, and he's miserable. He's been put to bed and he's bored. Ernie (Dr Wallace) is living with us now, and it's comforting to Nigel. Nige's stopped letting Emil fuck him, he's so big, it's too uncomfortable for him to have his Walrus' big dick in him. He told Emil to come to me for his sexual needs. I'm glad to keep Emil happy. I wanted to bond him, was going to try when I was not his student anymore, but he bonded Nigel before then.(I had planned to give Emil my cherry before they bonded.)( IF I had of that would be me with my belly stretched out that big. I'd of borne Emil all of the pups he wanted. Nigel is smaller than me, but I think Emil's pup would have stretched me out more than Boris' cub did. Emil Jr is bigger than Jamie was when he was born.)

Emil and I rut each other at least two or three times a day. I love it, but it reminds me of what life would be if I was his mate. He's horny a lot, seeing Nigel fat with his pup makes Emil so hot. I'm glad Ernie told me I can't get pregnant as long as I'm still nursing Jamie. He'll put me on the pill a few weeks before I start to wean Jamie. Emil would love it if he had sons by his Nigel and me both. But I'm not up to bearing a Walrus pup right now. Still, Emil keeps me happy sexually. He's a hot Walrus lover and makes me so hot.

Nigel had a hard time birthing little Emil Jr. He almost died pushing him out. He ruptured his womb passing his pup. Ernie spays Nigel immediately. Emil Jr is a beautiful Walrus pup. I thought Emil was the most beautiful Walrus I'd ever seen before I first saw Emil Jr. Nigel's recovered and like me is so proud of the son he bore for the male he loves. As they grow up together, they're as close as brothers. Jamie loves Emil Jr. Emil Jr is a good Walrus. And Emil Sr is so proud of him. (Both of our sons skip grades in school. Emil Jr seems to follow along when Jamie gets skipped ahead.)

Jamie has grown a lot very quickly. He's a big cub, and as he grows I see how bright he is. Boris must have been smarter than I thought. Just uneducated. Time goes on. I have random sex with guys I meet in a little gay bar I found, but they don't want to get involved with a single Lion male with a child. It's a shame as I've met a lot of good males. But in a way they are right. Jamie is and always will be my first priority. Finally, I stop dating altogether, I have sex with Emil, and Dmitri and Yuri and Ernie. It's enough to keep me happy.

I've realized I won't take any other male as my mate. I meant what I said when I had Jamie. But I'm not lonely and I don't go without sex. I just miss the Hell out of my Boris. I won't give up hope he'll come back one day. Even on the days it seems I'll never see him again, I can't give up hope, I still have faith in my big Russian Lion's love. I know my love for him will never die, and even if he never comes back to me, I'll love him forever. Jamie gets to be more and more like Boris every day that passes. He is the constant reminder of my love for Boris. And I find it comforting somehow.

I've finished my residency and I'm now a full Doctor and in practice with Emil and Nigel. And I'm still on the pill as we haven't yet figured out that I need to be barbed in order to ovulate. (It turns out that I do, I get barbed and my little ovaries shoot out an egg immediately. Just like a female Feline)

I miss Boris more each day. I didn't know him long and I can't say I knew him well. But to have his son, and he doesn't know it. I think of him several times daily. And at times I wonder if it's as much love as obsession. I go to see a friend of Emil's to do therapy. After six months, he tells me I don't really need to be in therapy. I just really miss the male I love and who's son I had proudly.

Fast forward to Jamie's third birthday. By sheer coincidence, Jamie was born the day before my birthday. And the day after Dad's. (Big surprise, we're all Leos. Dad's Aug 6th, Jamie's Aug 7th, and I'm Aug 8th) Dmitri and Yuri are quiet. I almost get the feeling there is something they want to ask me, but can't find the nerve. They're talking to Ernie a lot too. It has the definite feel of them being up to something.

After Gerry and Nigel and I have put Jamie and Emil Jr. to bed for the night, Ernie and Dmitri and Yuri come in my room to talk to me. Our Russian Bulls look determined, but a little afraid as well.

They want me to have a son for them. Ernie told them about a medicine that if I take it and they both cum in me close together will give them a son that shares some of both of their genes. Tentatively, Dmitri asks if I would bear their son. I smile deeply. If there is anyone who needs to have sons, it's my Russian Bulls. This world could use all of their bloodline it can get. Yuri tells me how proud they'd be to have me be the one to bear their son. I know I will. And I tell them so.(I don't tell them, but I'm kind of proud that all of my sons will have Russian fathers. As they are so big hearted and love me and their sons so much.)

They're ecstatic. Ernie tells me to stop the pill and in two weeks he'll give me the medicine and Dmitri and Yuri will take me together. And we'll repeat it every day for a few days. (No real need, I get knocked up the first time, but I'll always fuck my Bulls anytime with or without an excuse)

I go tell Dad what we're going to do and he's proud. Like me he really loves the Petrov brothers and he's happy they'll sire his second Grandson. Dmitri and Yuri get more excited each day that passes while we wait. When the day comes, they can hardly wait for the 30 minutes the shot requires to take effect. They both take me together in a double penetration. We figured it would assure the mix of semen required for our son to belong to both of them. We do it two or three times a day for a few days.

It's almost become a routine. I get up. Ernie gives me a shot and Dmitri and Yuri fuck me all day. On the sixth day, I wake up puking. Ernie tests my urine and it's chock full of FCG. A hormone produced only by a pregnant Feline. Our Russian Bulls are thrilled. And they are very solicitous of me, as they will be during my whole pregnancy with their sons. (Yes, sons. That drug worked too well, and it made me drop two eggs at once. I have two fraternal twin Bulls in me. One looks just like Dmitri and the other just like Yuri. They're thrilled when they see the ultrasound.) They spoil me and are so proud of my giving them each a son.

I'm really sick and I take to my bed for the day. I get up the next day and I feel better. By the end of my third month I'm really huge and when we have the ultrasound, Dmitri and Yuri are so happy. They each have a son by me. They tell me in excited Russian that they'll love both of their sons. Ernie tells me as big as they are for only being three and a half months, that I'd best get used to the idea of a C section. Fine with me, they're already almost as big as Jamie was when he was born.

Dad and I sit down with Jamie and we explain to him what's going on. He's excited to have two baby brothers coming. He and Emil Jr are as close as brothers, but he wants a baby brother and he's so happy to be getting two. Dmitri and Yuri treat him as if he was theirs and he loves them too. He does ask them later if they'll still love him, and they happily assure him they will.

He's such a well behaved cub, and smart as hell already. He's grown up surrounded by loving adults and Emil Jr. Emil Jr's a brilliant pup, but he can be a bit shy at times. But he's loving and open with me and Dad and his parents. He really loves Jamie. He doesn't say much when we tell him about me being pregnant again. But he'll tell Gerry later he's happy if they'll love him as much as Jamie does. (They will)

By my seventh month, I'm so big I'm having trouble getting around and Ernie puts me in bed until I am ready to have them cut out of me. I hate this, but Nigel spends a lot of time with me, He hated it too. Jamie and Emil Jr spend a lot of time with me, they'll sit with me and we'll watch TV or I'll read to them. They both love me a lot and they love spending time with me.

When my cramps start after nine months and two weeks, I'm really ready to have them taken out. Dmitri takes me to the hospital. And I'm prepped and put out. I don't remember any of the surgery. I wake up to a grinning Dmitri and Yuri holding our sons. Andrei and Alexei Petrov are really big for newborns.

And they're beautiful Siberian Bull Calves. I hug them to me. Nursing them both is way harder than nursing just Jamie was. Dad brings Jamie and Emil Jr. in and they're as happy as can be. . When they're finished nursing, Dad and I help him and Emil Jr hold each of them for a while. Jamie looks at his half brothers with so much love, makes Dad and I really proud of him. Emil Jr looks proud and happy too. Nigel and I have told him they'll be his brothers as well.

I recover quickly and we soon take them home. Dmitri and Yuri are proud fathers. And so happy. Little Alexei and Andrei are happy, loving Calves. And they like Jamie and Emil Jr. are well behaved too. Gerry is more than able to tend them, and he tends them well. Gerry is so patient with them, and he tends them so lovingly. Our boys adore him. (When our last sons hit 18 they all beg Gerry to stay. We talk and he retires and I keep him with us. Per their family's ways, I give him a big settlement check, and I agree to keep and maintain him. I'll do the same for Edward when he finally retires. But he's already said he won't leave us when he's too old to serve.)

I go back to work in a few weeks. The C section was so much easier on me. Life is normal for long while. The twins are 6 and Jamie and Emil Jr are 9 now. Jamie's a bright Lion, and does really well in school. He looks more and more like Boris as time goes on. He's already pretty big too. He's gonna be as big as Boris by the time he's in his late teens probably. Our Bull twins are almost as big as Emil Jr and Jamie already. They're going to be as big as Dmitri and Yuri when they're in their teens. Sometimes looking at my beautiful sons is enough to make me cry. They're all three stunningly beautiful. Alexei and Andrei look like Dmitri and Yuri, but with my Sapphire Blue eyes. Jamie looks like Boris with my eyes too. (It's a dominant gene, all of my sons have mine and Dad's Sapphire Blue eyes.)

One Friday afternoon, just a week after my birthday, I get a call at my office from a very excited Anya. They found Boris! Anya and Una are 'the girls', an exclusive private detective agency. Their mom and aunt started it. There is a long history of their family working for mine and they're like family. They never knew their own father, and they call Dad 'Daddy Lion' and treat me as a little brother. When my heart stops pounding and I can find my voice I ask Anya where he is, and if he's OK. I wont ask what I most want to know. Does he remember me and will he come home to me?

She laughs. "He was taken for ransom when he disappeared, his family thought he was dead, but he got amnesia from being hit on the head." Anya says. "He's been working as a farm hand since then, all these years he had no clue that he'd ever lived in the US." she adds. "He still doesn't remember much, only seeing a picture of you made him remember at least that he cared for you, it was enough to get him to allow us to bring him here" Anya says. "I don't know what to say" I say softly. Anya giggles. "We're going to bring him to see you and Daddy Lion tonight after you get home, we hope seeing you in person might snap him out of it" Anya says. I can't speak. So many questions in my mind. How will he react to having a son he doesn't know? And how will he feel that I had sons for Dmitri and Yuri? So many things run through my mind, making my head spin. She hangs up. (They told me the cover story the KGB used, they know what really happened, but they don't know how the whole, real truth will affect me, so they keep it quiet. He'll tell me the whole truth about everything. He's as honest as I am.)

I call Nigel on his cell. "Nige, they found him, 'the girls' found Boris, and they're bringing him home tonight" I squeak out. He rushes to my office. We sit and talk it over. "Claude, he will remember you, and you'll see, he would hardly come all this way if he didn't know he loved you" Nigel says soothingly. "According to Anya he thinks he's Ivan Archenko and he's a simple farm worker, he doesn't remember living in the US at all, but he at least vaguely remembers me" I say. "He'll remember you, he loved you, it was obvious, at least you know now he didn't leave you intentionally" Nigel says. I nod. We talk it out for a while longer til I have to stop for my next patient. Nigel goes back to his office.

I call Dad at his office. He's already heard the 'good news'. Una called him while Anya called me. He's happy. He really liked Boris. We talk of how to handle this. He thinks we should tell Boris right off he has a son. I don't agree. Be enough of a shock if he remembers me. We argue for a while. Dad finally agrees not to confront him with Jamie right off. (I should have listened to Dad, he knows how a father would react to his son, even one he didn't know he had)

Emil comes into my office a bit later. He hugs me. "Mein Claude, I am glad he will come to you, you have kept quiet about it, but you love him so much and been so miserable without him" he says quietly My Walrus mentor knows me so well.. I cry and he pulls me up out of my chair and hugs me tightly. I cry harder. "My Liebchen, cry it all out, we love you, we'll help you through this no matter what happens" he says soothingly. I cry a bit more and stop. He strokes my mane. I kiss him and he goes back to his office.

I'm tense as we leave to go home for the day. Will my Boris remember me? And how will I cope if he doesn't? I go shower, and I dress. I put on my tightest jeans and a tank top, and I go see my boys.

Jamie is excited, he heard Dad and Papa Harry talking. "Is my Daddy finally coming home?" Jamie asks. I weep and I sit and I explain everything to my Lion son. He's so bright and Dad and I have always told him the truth about everything. Dmitri is playing with the twins. And he smiles at me. "He will remember you, Katya, he loved you, Yuri and I will help" Dmitri says softly. I hug Dmitri. "I know, Katya, you are scared, what if he doesn't know you or his son" Dmitri says stroking my mane.

Edward comes in and tells me they're here. And I'm terrified. Not only if he doesn't remember but also if he does. Dmitri hugs me and I feel better. "Daddy?" Jamie says. I look over at him. He's got the same look on his face as I do. On an impulse I pick him up and bring him with me.(Jamie's 9 yet he still loves being in his Dad's arms, or any of those who are fatherly to him. Yuri always picks him up and hugs him and holds him, in fact, Yuri will hold all three of my sons in his lap when he can.. Dr White thinks Jamie's need to still be held is due to the insecurity of not knowing his father.) Dad was right. "Thank you, Daddy, even if he doesn't remember us, I want to see him too" Jamie says. I'm so damned proud of him, he knows he needs to be with me and that we'll comfort one another if things go wrong. We walk into the living room and Dad glares at me when he sees Jamie in my arms.(I fought him so hard over immediately confronting Boris with his son) "I'm sorry, Dad, I was wrong to argue with you, you were right, Jamie needs to be here too" I mouth to him. Dad grins.

Boris is sitting on the couch between Anya and Una. He looks at me closely. When I see him for the first time in so long, my heart stops and I can't speak. He's even more beautiful than the last time I saw him. He smiles softly. He gets up and walks over to me. He's grinning and I know he's recognized me. A quick look at his pants shows he recognized me for sure. That massive Feline dick is stiffening up as he gets closer to me. He stops, looking at Jamie. Jamie smiles brightly at Boris. Thank God, my Jamie seemed to inherit Dad's poise and grace under pressure. God only knows, I didn't. Boris is looking at Jamie closely. I see he's recognized him as his son. He's grinning broadly.

He grabs Jamie from out of my arms, and hugs him tightly to his barrel chest. "You have to be my son" he says in Russian, and he breaks down. "I am, you're my Daddy" Jamie says in Russian. I'm surprised that he's as fluent as he is, but then again, Dmitri and Yuri and I taught him. Boris pulls Jamie into his arms and cradles him in them. He silently holds Jamie tightly while he cries for a while.

Boris turns to me. "I didn't leave you willingly, I did not remember you at all, until now" he says in perfect English. "You had my son, he's old enough, I must have fathered him the last time we were together" he says crying. "You must hate me for abandoning you and our son" he says sadly. I hug him tightly. "I don't hate you, Boris, I love you still, and I mourned for your loss every single day you were gone, I had our son and raised him praying that one day you'd come home to us" I say. "You left me pregnant and I proudly bore your son" I say weeping into his massive barrel chest. Boris nods. "I did not know, but I have been told by Anya and Una how it was possible, and this is definitely my son, he has to be, he is so much me" he says kissing Jamie. Jamie looks as happy as I do. Boris hugs us both tightly. "Daddy, please don't leave us again" Jamie says through his tears. I nod. I know how Jamie feels. Boris has a tear in his eye when Jamie says that. Makes me feel better somehow. "I am home for good, my son and my love" Boris says quietly.

"I did not leave you willingly, Katya, I was kidnapped for ransom, they wanted money from my Grandparents, I'm back, and I have a son, and my Katya loves and forgives me, I could not leave you now, except by my death" Boris says fiercely.

Dmitri walks out and they happily chatter in Russian for a while. Anya is talking to Dad. They're making arrangements to get Boris a bond and have his things sent. "You had sons for your Bulls?" he asks. I nod, Gerry brings Alexei and Andrei out. "I had them both, they are fraternal twins, my Dmitri and Yuri fathered them together" I say. "They are beautiful Bulls" Boris says softly. Andrei and Alexei smile at Boris. Seeing he's holding Jamie they run and hug him. "He's my real Dad" Jamie says proudly. "You're our Uncle?" Andrei asks. "Da, such beautiful Bulls I would be proud to be their Uncle" Boris says. Dmitri smiles. "We proud of beautiful sons Katya give us" He says. Boris smiles. "Jamie such wonderful cub, we get Katya to give us sons, he give one apiece at same time, he love his Bulls, but he mourned his Boris no come home" Dmitri says. Boris grins.

I'm struck by how different he seems now. He spoke before in Broken English and was more ebullient. He seems calmer and smarter somehow. "I have been further educated and I have had brain surgery to correct damage from an injury" He says. It's as if he guessed what I was thinking. I cry. "Katya, this is a lot for both of us, but know I still love you as I did, I am sorry to have been away, but if you would take me to you, I will spend our lives making it up to you and our sons" Boris says quietly. Jamie's got tears in his eyes too, just like I have. I've always been honest with him about the circumstances around his conception , he knows he was fathered by a big Russian Lion who disappeared before he knew I was going to have him. He knows we've looked for Boris, and he seemed happy to have me and Dad and Harry as father figures. But he's happier to have his Dad back than I'd of thought. I realize I hadn't thought it out properly. How would I have reacted to Dad's being gone? Bad enough I lost Momma when I was born. She died having me. I only know her by pictures Dad has, and by him and Edward telling me about her. I'm grateful Jamie won't have to only know of his father the same way.

Edward calls dinner and I take Boris' paw and lead him and Jamie to the table. Anya tells me they'll get his stuff and bring it a bit later. I hug them. We sit and eat. Jamie's watching Boris. After a bit I see why. Boris eats like Jamie does, his mannerisms and the way he holds his utensils is the same. Jamie's got tears in his eyes. After dinner we take Jamie to his room. And he and Boris talk.. I didn't eat hardly at all. I was too overwhelmed to trust my stomach. For once, I wish I could drink alcohol. But I can't, no tolerance at all.

I go to the the twins' bedroom to make sure they're OK. Quite frankly, I need a respite, my emotions are swirling around and threatening to swamp me. Dmitri and Yuri are in playing with them. We sit and talk. They're so happy and happy for us. Dmitri talked to Boris during dinner and he's not even remotely upset that I had sons by them. They talked a lot. "He told us how much he still loves you, Katya, he wants to bond you if you'll take him" Dmitri says. I'm both extremely happy and very terrified to hear that.

"Dmitri, I love him still, but we don't know each other, I didn't know him that well from then, we basically just fucked and I only knew him for a couple of months" I say. "Katya, he loved you before he was taken from you, he told us back then that he was going to bond you, and he did not have a chance to because he was taken" Yuri says softly. "Guys, what do I do, do I take him and we get to know each other or do we wait and get to know each other first and then bond?" I ask. "Katya, you should be talking to him about that" Dmitri says. "Guys, your opinions have always mattered a lot, you are smart Bulls and you've always been there for me" I say.

Dmitri kisses my paw. "I know, Katya, the way you agreed so fast to give Yuri and I a calf told us how much we meant to you" he says smiling. "You endured much to give us our precious Calves, and you are as their proud mother" he says smiling. "I know, we tried to joint bond, I'd of been proud to belong to my Russian Bulls but we weren't meant to be" I say softly. "Katya, go talk to Boris, you know you need to, but you are scared to" Yuri says. "He's in with Jamie now, they're getting to know each other" I say. "Katya, you need talk to Boris , don't be afraid, you have many who love you and who will help you if you need them to" he says. "He loved you so much then, and it looks like he still does" Dmitri says.

I lean down and pick up Alexei and hug him. He hugs me back. "Daddy, don't be afraid of talking to Jamie's Father." Alexei says smiling. "We see how much he loves our birth Daddy" Andrei says. I hug them tightly. Alexei resembles Dmitri more than just by looking like him and having his coat color. He's as pragmatic as his Bull Fathers. I kiss him and kiss Andrei too. My Bull sons love me too. "I just don't know what I'd do without my loving Bulls" I say. They all hug me. "Katya, no be scared" Yuri says. My Bulls know how to comfort me, and my Bull sons do too. I am suddenly so grateful that I did bear them, they're joyous Calves and they are as loving as their Russian Bull fathers. I'm proud that they have some of me in them.