Ch. 66
#71 of True Confessions of a Trainer
Sybil
I awoke in a panic. Paranoid glance around a semi-dark room. Unfamiliar. Too clean. Too fresh. Smell of soap. Of other pokemon. Of the sea air. Instinctively I wanted to lash out with my claws and leap for the window. But something pulled me back. The memories of yesterday began to flood in.
What. The. Hell. Did I do? Did I really just throw myself into his life like that? Into theirs? And he just took me, just like that? Was he nuts? Was I?
Once my heart stopped racing, I was able to get up, look around, really take it in. Where I was. Who I was with. The absol, Helena, had one eye open, keeping watch as I did, but underneath his arm, and curled up close to him, she made no move that might stir him. Just watched, and waited.
They were all on the floor. Nobody in a pokeball. The bed was too small, so he slept on the floor with them. The arcanine was propping him up, head and shoulders. A big, warm, fluffy pillow. He was half covered by the tail of his delphox, who was snoring a little. One leg wrapped up in ribbons, a sylveon perfectly content in that boneless sort of way they managed, to be asleep on and between his ankles.
The delphox was embraced from behind by the lycanroc, although her long arm was also draped across him, resting easy on his chest. Her ear swiveled toward me, one claw raised, aware of exactly where I was, and ready if she needed to be. That didn't surprise me. The miltank, Cocoa, was resting against the arcanine as well, her head on his shoulder, and drooling a little.
Everyone was around him. In contact with him in some way. Some more than others, but equal parts comfort and protection. The lycanroc and the absol were the light sleepers. The moment anything was different, they were ready to defend him. Doubtless the others would be right behind. He could have kept them in the pokeballs. Could have let them sleep on the floor or the other furniture. But he pulled it all down to be with them. Chose them over human comforts, and did so happily. With them, wherever that was going to be. Weird fucking human... but that's the kind of shit I needed to see.
And they were all ready. Clearly. No matter where he was, he wasn't alone, was he? He hadn't been kidding, then. About being hunted. Even here, they were ready. I would be, too. He didn't have to take me in, I'd make it up to him.
But first I had to understand what he was running from.
Helena
And there it was. Her burst of anxiety. She handled it well, and she handled it quietly. Sybil didn't stir him, or the others, just took it all in, and calmed herself down. Thought it through before she sat by the wall, beneath the window. She was too wound up to go back to sleep, but kept it as her problem, and that was good.
Fucker had enough on his plate already. This was supposed to be a chance for him to relax. Like hell I was about to let her interrupt it with her bullshit. Tempest was of a similar mind, it seemed. A quick glance shared between us before she let her hand relax again. It wasn't long before she was asleep again. She'd come back a little late with Claire, who was so exhausted she was trembling with every step. If master was bothered by it, fucker didn't let on at all. Just got her to lay down, rubbed her back and shoulders and let her rest early.
Tempest waved it off, her own fatigue, but he insisted, and set to her after. Easing out her aches and pains and giving her time to unwind and relax. They'd talked about everything and nothing. Somehow it meandered back to her childhood dreams, watching performing pokemon and the fashion contests. Wanting to be an idol. It was a cute thought, but ... I could tell she wasn't always happy with being who she was. What she was.
Seems we had something in common, there.
It wasn't all bad, though. Not lately at least. Master had given me a lot of good things to feel about being an absol. I'd enjoyed being able to just dance and play and be myself with him. To not have to try and figure out what I was feeling, or answer questions about it. To just let it be, and for a little while just be one of his girls. To steal him away in the dead of night and let him know he was mine, too.
I didn't need my horn to tell me how he felt about that. Fucker made it pretty clear, and left the proof of it dripping out of me. Arceus but I wanted to give him something to show for it. I knew we all did. He just had that effect on us. Still, I wasn't complaining about fun I didn't have to take care of after. Not right then at least.
It was nice. I could just be his absol. One of his many lovers. His friend. His partner. I didn't have to be Helena the soothsayer. I didn't have to be Helena the run-away. I didn't have to be Helena the troublemaker, on guard from everything and everyone. I could be Helena, his mate, lying on her back beneath the moon, showing him her belly, and letting him feel it from the inside. And it felt good. It felt so damn good the way he loved me. The way his body responded to mine, the way we fit together.
Arceus, but he was huge for me. It was so much. Too much. I couldn't feel anything in my horn when he was inside me. It was all drowned out by him. By his passion for me. By his lust over me. And I loved it. I loved the way he made it all quiet down. Made the whole world quiet and still so he could make love to me. So he could fuck me. So he could use me. So he could breed me.
It was weird to realize I was getting used to it. The ways he was, perverse, almost nasty as a lover. He enjoyed the way I stretched around him, the way my body clung to his, as he pushed and pulled through me. Teased swollen, puffy lips with his fingers as he pumped himself into me, slow and hard. Only grew more passionate at the sound of my moaning, and panting for him. Shameless deep wet kisses between us, growled and pulled me even closer as my teeth grazed at his skin.
I loved that he didn't pull out. That he only pushed in harder, as deep as he could get, and filled me. I loved the way I felt with him, and loved the way I could make him feel, in return.
Trainer
I had decided to let the girls sleep in. Tempest and Claire in particular. Whatever they were out so late over, they came back exhausted. I wanted to scold them a little, but at the same time, honestly, they were home safe, they weren't unhappy, they'd have told me if they needed something from me. The tournament was just a thing we were doing. They didn't owe me that. It was fine. We'd win, or we'd lose, but that didn't change the color of my sky, or the fact that they were the stars in it.
Still, I couldn't have said I liked our odds with both of them being so tired today. It would be what it was, I figured. The three pins we had had begun to tell a story, the ship at harbor had departed in the second pin, now sliding through the waves. The third pin showing the battle deck, as seen from the stands. Starkly different from the first two, the third was enameled in black and white.
I wondered where the pins would take us, how many we'd have in hand by the end of it. If we'd even get through today. But it was a small matter. We still had eleven days of fun to be found. I'd debated a shower, but decided instead to just wash my face, brush my teeth and be about it. An early start and honestly I was ravenous. Helena had worn me out last night, and I could still feel her if I closed my eyes and let my mind wander. Unfortunately, I could also feel the gnawing, empty pit in my belly. A trip to the breakfast buffet was in order.
Sybil was there, waiting for me. Sitting at the edge of the tub. "I can't beleive you took me in, just like that." She said after a few moments of clearly trying to find words. "I knew you wanted to fuck me, but ... what, are you desperate or something?" It was teasing, but the self-doubt was on full display. She'd been awake too long, clearly. Flinched when I came and sat next to her.
"I mean, have you seen yourself? Damn." I teased, reaching up to take hold of one of her claws. Tense, anxious digits pulling away just slightly before she held my hand. She was cold in that weird way some pokemon were. Uncomfortably so, but I'd just have to tough it out for now. "Not to be an asshole about it, but when you suggested it was on the table I just wanted you on the nearest table." Not quite true, but not too terribly far off. She giggled at that, and sighed. Some of her stress dispelled by it. "But it's different. Yeah. If you're still offering, I'm interested and then some." I said, tugging her hand to pull her in a little closer. "You don't have to let me fuck you to stay, but I'm not gonna lie, I really hope you will."
"I told you before." She said, hopping down from her perch to stand next to me, her cat-like pupils narrowed in the light, as she met my gaze. "You're a weird fucking human, and I'm totally into it. You wanna fuck, just pull it out and I'll show you a good time. Or just play with me, must be nice not having claws." She said with a wink, raising her free hand, no less than a fistful of knives on the end of it. "Say what you want, but I'm gonna be easy for you. Really. Really. Easy." She sighed, and shook her head, a toothy grin crossing her features. "And yeah, I already know you fuck the rest of them. Caught your little show with the absol last night. Good stuff. Don't care. As long as you're treating me good in the ways that I need, I don't care." She sighed, and tugged away at that. "Now tell me what we're running from."
Wendy
It had been about a month since I'd heard from him. His tablet had been offline the whole time. I knew why. It wasn't about me. It didn't make it hurt less. It seemed like I'd managed to avoid the problems, but it was small consolation. I missed him. Missed the sound of his voice, the meals he cooked on the road. I missed his pokemon. Missed Penance too. She'd been right, all along, and I knew that now. She deserved better. I hoped he was making her happy. I tried not to be jealous knowing she was making him happy too.
That last night we'd shared together was amazing. Everything about it felt weird and wonderful and wrong and so damn right. Sneaking off with Penance later on to make her promise me she would take care of him, I realized how much it was going to hurt to be apart from him. It broke my old beliefs about what I wanted in a boyfriend. If I even really wanted a boyfriend, exactly. The way he saw the world, the way he treated it was so different.
Stacky and I had grown close, but it was different, too. Sure. I loved the way he felt in me. I loved the way he responded to my touch, to my voice. To every little thing. We'd found our way together, and it was good. But I made sure he knew what it was. What it wasn't. He'd have to take me as I was, and accept that while he might be the closest by my side, he was gonna share my heart. He was gonna have to.
He didn't complain when I found our next new friend, either. The lopunny got along well enough, he was agile and attentive. We even won our next badge together, Stacky and Sprinter had a kind of easy friendship. It didn't hurt that the lopunny was quick to grab the spare brush and start from the other side when I was looking after Stacatto. It took me a few weeks to realize he wasn't just being friendly, but I wasn't complaining about Stacky having another outlet.
I hadn't pushed the issue of course, whatever they were up to, as long as they were happy. But it kind of came to a head when I caught them by the river one night. I was gonna just let the two be, but somehow that wasn't in the cards for them. We made an awful late start of the next morning, and I was sore all day. Somewhere in the back of my mind I felt guilty for it, like I owed my friend an explanation or an apology, but I knew I was bein' silly. He was probably nailin' Penance right about now anyway.
So what was the harm if Sprinter had some fun with us, too?
Was nice to be included, if I had to be honest. To be able to just enjoy myself, and not worry about what either of them thought. Although I mighta had a thing or two to say about the smell of wet lopunny fur. Still, at least he hadn't come home sticky. Yet.
Sybil
Arceus be damned. He really did need a girl like me. Don't get me wrong, his little team was cute, but cunning they were not. Aside from Helena, at any rate. She knew more than she let on, and wasn't afraid to use it. We'd get on fine, or we'd hate each other. I wasn't sure which, yet. The others... yeah they were devoted, and sweet, but devoted and sweet doesn't do you much good against a predator.
No. He needed me. Sure, I knew he could fight. Helena told me he wasn't lying about the hatchet. That was good. Meant he had moxie, he was a weird human, bit of a soft touch, but all the muscle wasn't for show. He could be cruel if he had to be. She wasn't wrong about that being a turn on, either. He was willing to get his hands dirty, fight for something he believed in, and put himself in the front doing so, damn the consequences.
We at least agreed that he was worth mating. It was important for new friends to have something in common, I'd been told. Not sure this was what my mother had meant, but it would do. He was worth my time, and we could figure out the rest. For now, it was my job to be what he wasn't. What they weren't. Cunning. Clever. Careful. I could keep to the blind spots, and make sure he didn't get taken for a ride.
At least, not one his girls didn't approve of.
Today though, I had a very important job to do. I had to see how his strongest friends fought. If Cocoa was any indication, I wasn't about to be disappointed.
Tempest
This was what I'd been waiting for. Finally. The stands were packed. Hundreds of people, cheering, chanting, and I was the one he'd chosen for today. Shoulder to shoulder with a hitmonchan. He'd nodded at me, and got his guard up. He was ready. He was eager, and rested and I could see it in his eyes, he had been waiting for this fight all day.
I was ready too. I thought. Until I saw what we were up against. The blastoise I could tell was going to give us problems. But it was the zoroark that gave me chills. I bristled, I could feel the chill down my back at his glare. The memories of saving master. Of how badly I'd been hurt. For a moment I knew I'd flinched. And then I saw red.
"He's mine." I snarled, pointing one heavy claw at the zoroark. The hitmonchan just shrugged, and turned his attention to the blastoise. "Fine. Suit yourself." He replied, a few warm up jabs as the introductions concluded over the speakers, far too loud now. Drowning out my thoughts. I tried to calm myself down, but I couldn't quiet my heart. I couldn't hold it back. When the match started, I rushed him.
He kept up with me in close combat. Training? Instinct? Couldn't say. Nothing I did there seemed to matter, just got me bloodied by his claws. Another scar from the monster. It didn't matter. Master wasn't going to get hurt anymore. I wouldn't let him. Not this time. "I can see you, you bastard!" I shouted at him, as he lunged in. I think he'd expected me to back away. I didn't. Felt the claws rend me, the pain of it, the shock. It calmed me down, and his next swing went wide. He was open. The headbutt I delivered staggered him. I don't think he expected me to tear out my own fur breaking off sharp shards of stone to hurl at him as he sought distance. He was as bloodied as I was, the rocks had gashed open his forehead, and we squared off, painting the mat red as we circled one another.
It wasn't a proper fight after that. We resorted to biting and gouging at one another until I got the upper hand, my teeth sinking through his fur and leaving him whimpering beneath me. Too bad, I wasn't about to give him another chance to hurt my mate. I bit hard, felt his shoulder crunch beneath my teeth, and the rake of his claws at my side didn't find much purchase. He was ruined, he wasn't getting away. It was only then that I heard him. Pained, whimpering, begging me.
"Please. No more. Please. Please."
Claire
Oh, honey. Tempest, no. I'm so sorry.
I could see it in her eyes as she pulled away, the fear, the revulsion. The first time in her life she'd ever been ashamed, truly ashamed as she slinked back to master's side. She'd won the fight, but she could see it in his eyes as much as I knew she felt it in herself. What she'd been in that moment shocked her. Hurt her. It wasn't supposed to be that kind of fight. It wasn't supposed to be something like that.
It was a risk we all took. Really getting hurt. The scars she had, the ones I did, too. Some of them I knew ran deeper than others. I could feel it in her, the fear, the moment she snapped. The rage. And now, the shame. The guilt. The horror. I could almost taste it, the bile rising as she saw the damage she'd caused, the hurt and the harm in what should have been something competitive and fun.
It was league sanctioned, she didn't go too far, according to them. She stopped when he gave up. The match was decided behind her back. The hitmonchan had done his part, but even those two trainers were in shock about what they'd just witnessed. The medics from the pokemon center were carefully putting that zoroark on a stretcher. The crowd had fallen silent. Tempest was crying, sobbing and shaking in master's arms.
She hadn't meant to hurt anyone like that. Not for a tournament, not for this. I could feel it welling up before she got sick. And he led her away, to a quiet corner, and let her. Let her heave her anxious heart out. Held her, and pet her and did what he could... but it was small comfort compared to what she was feeling. There wasn't anything we could do, but be there for her. So I came down from the stands, and held her hand.
It would be a long time before the trembling stopped.