Trent's Story
Hello, I'm Terry Wolf, a white wolf with a blue tipped tail and the writer of the series Cost of Love. That story is still in progress, but I need to take a break and ended up writing this. Yes I am gay and proud of it, though I am against rape. But I was depressed when I wrote this. Well enough about me, here is my story
Disclaimer: This story contains rape, depression, and suicide. If any of this offends you I advise you not to read. Though, if you wish to continue, then please do and rate.
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Life was horrible for Trent Clamer. He was a seventeen-year-old white wolf who lived with his mom and dad. It's been about two years since his parents remarried, trying to make life perfect again. But it couldn't be perfect. In those two years Trent life hand spun down the drain. He had begun fighting with friends for no apparent reason and to top it off his dad had started beating him about a year or so ago. But how does a seventeen year old get beat up and not do anything about it? You see Trent had lost all will power by then and didn't care what happened to him. But that wasn't what hurt him the most. What hurt him the most was that his mom never knew what happened to him. Though not all was that bad. He had been looking forward to living on his own, but today things changed.
School had brought him down even more. He had another fight with a friend, another fight with the guidance worker. A friend bailed on him, so he had to stay at home for the weekend, something he know that his dad would use to teach him that he should be home more. It was a long walk home too. The guidance worker made him miss his bus. He just took his time, not wanting to go to hell, his home. It was what he had named it, because that's what it was to him. He arrived an hour before ten pm, and just as it started to rain. He hadn't noticed that his mom's car wasn't home, which meant that he was surely going to get beaten for being late. And as he thought, once in his dad growled at him and ordered him not to leave. Picking up a bat his dad mumbled about getting his report card and how Trent had three F's. That was the final straw for Trent. Now, he knew that he couldn't be here anymore.
So, Trent turned and slowly walked out of his house. It was the only thing he could do. It hurt too much to be in that place, that place that claims his happiness, his home. But he had nowhere to go. His friends had slowly been leaving him one by one. With not much but two friends left, one who wasn't ever really around, and the other who he got into a huge fight with today. There wasn't anywhere he could turn. He just took a deep sigh before he continued walking. He always found it easier to run from the pain, just pretend that it isn't there. Hence the point he acted like life was so great. He was disobeying a direct order not to leave, but he did anyway. His dad had gotten mad at him for his slipping grades. It was funny his grades in a way reflected what was happening with his friendships, slipping.
So he walked, just off into the raining night. He had nothing but a thin jacket on. He promised himself that he wouldn't cry, but that didn't stop the tears from rolling down his muzzle. It always seemed like he was searching for something he didn't know of. Something to fill that hole that existed in him, anything to get rid of the pain. But no matter how hard he looked, he just got more lost. Everything in his life became bleak and he was losing his will to survive.
He tried to hum, but only started to sob. So he thought it would just be better to stay quite. The tears were still rolling down his muzzle, but no one could tell. They were getting mixed in with the rain. Silently he walked. As if nothing around him could see him. Slipping back into that world where he didn't exist. To be away from it all. Away with no goals or hopes in life. A place where he felt safe, even...loved. Into what people these days call their happy place, but to him it was home. That place he felt that he belonged.
He didn't make it more then half way down the block, before he fell to his knees. Oh, if only his God had answered his prayers. But his God never cared. That was one of the main reasons he had stopped believing. But even in times of disbelief the only thing that he could, wanted to do, was pray.
"Dear God, I know I don't believe, but life isn't working for me. It's all become too hard and I can't take it. I know I've said things about you, but I have nowhere else to turn. Please help me...please," he whispered, but nothing came. "DAMN YOU GOD!!! YOU'RE NEVER THERE WHEN I NEED YOU!!!"
Trent stood, his pants clinging to his legs from the water they held. He started to laugh. "Typical, no ones ever there. Why did I think he would be? WHAT DO YOU TAKE ME FOR? A FOOL!?!" His laughter increased.
He walked off laughing when he heard his dad yell at him to get back. He just raised his paw and gave him the finger. He didn't care. Why should he? No one cared about him. Just goes to show what neglect can do, from family, friends, anyone. All he need was himself; at least that's what he kept telling himself. He heard his dad yell something to the effect of good riddance and don't come home.
He didn't plan to. Nor did he plan to be in school anymore. He also planned on never seeing his friends. Besides he saw no real reason to keep them. He'd just end up hurting them again. Well, hurting the last two he had.
Trent didn't want to loss them, but who does want to lose a friend? He knew in the long run that they would be better with out him. No more dealing with his emotions, or his jokes, or him twisting things into sexual comments, or his life. He'd just be alone. Where only he had to deal with it. He didn't need anyone's help. Besides when he did ask for their help it just made him realize how much better their lives where then his.
Some things are better left unexplained, right? He thought.
Trent sighed, giving that single things are better this way. He continued onto the next road. Walking right in between traffic, having a bunch of people curse at him. He just laughed at them.
"Maybe if I'm lucky one of them will hit me," he mumbled.
But to his surprise, one of them stopped offering him a ride. He climbed in, not caring that he didn't know the person, or the fact that he was risking his life.
"So where to kid?" the driver, a male lion, asked.
"Anywhere but here," Trent sighed. He closed the door and rested his head on the window.
"You look like you have had a lousy day," the all to kind driver had asked him.
"Just more issues that I'm running from." He stated. Trent didn't want to talk about it; he didn't even look at this driver while he talked. He just closed his eyes as more tears rolled down his face.
"Ah, a runaway. I did that when I was about your age..." The driver kept talking but Trent wasn't listening.
Why was he talking Trent thought? It's not like he can relate to me.
"Look, could we not talk about this," Trent asked. He looked at the driver, who only smiled at him. The driver just went on taking them both to wherever. Trent didn't know where he was going, but he didn't care. No one would miss him. The driver had taken him to a park, a park Trent knew all to well. The driver unbuckled and grabbed Trent's muzzle, pulling him towards him.
"Didn't your parents tell you not to take rides with strangers?" Trent struggled. But he was pined down. The driver forced Trent's muzzle to part allowing their tongues to touch.
The driver sat back up and pulled up a dagger. "You do as I say and nothing will happen."
Trent replied with a nod.
"Good, now stay still."
The driver pulled off his shirt and undid his pants. The driver pushed Trent back and laid on top of him. Gripping Trent's shirt, the lion ripped it, exposing Trent's white furred chest. The driver then moved to Trent's pants, undoing those. He let his hand glide down Trent's sheath, that wasn't doing anything. Trent was straight and had never once had thought of a guys touch. But out of lack of wanting to live, he did nothing to stop himself from being used. The driver spread Trent's legs apart, showing the driver his virgin hole. The driver pulled off his briefs and put his elongating piece on Trent's entrance. He then pushed with a hard shove, forcing Trent's body to give him entrance.
Trent winced feeling himself being probed. With another thrust the driver had delivered his whole package into Trent's bowls. Trent yelped as he felt the unwanted visitor inside of him. The driver glared at him, and Trent realized that he was to keep quite. The driver began pulling himself out and pushing back in, 'causing the flesh on his hole to chafe. The moaning of the driver increased as he felt the warm blood start to cover his cock. Trent winced in pain again, his bowls were bleeding and his skin was chafed. The driver started to thrust faster, coming towards climax. Blood now covered his cock and Trent was in serious pain. With his final thrusts the lion released, sending his load into Trent.
The lion slowly pulled himself out of Trent. "Now, lick my cock clean."
Was he serious? I never wanted to taste cum, or blood. Trent thought. But Trent did, fearing for his life and founding no will to not do it. He slowly wrapped his muzzle around it and began to clean the driver's cock off with his tongue. Trent shuddered; the taste was unbearable to anything he had ever tasted. Every drop that touched his tongue made him want to vomit. And when it was clean the driver didn't let Trent take his muzzle off his cock. The driver had grabbed Trent's head and had started thrusting, hard. Gagging Trent each time. Trent tried to pull away, but the driver only pulled his head back hard with each thrust. The lion moaned feeling the warmth of Trent's mouth, slowly coming back to climax. Trent gave up fighting. He just endured the taste as best he could. The driver pulled Trent's head back hard, releasing again and forcing Trent to swallow.
"Good, now get out of the car."
Trent did as he was ordered, with nothing but a torn shirt and no pants. The lion got out of the car and proceeded to Trent. The driver rested the tip of the knife on Trent's chest. He slowly pushed in getting a pled from Trent to stop. The lion grinned getting shear pleasure from hurting Trent. He proceeded to carve the flesh into his own symbol on Trent's chest. The driver reached into the car and pulled out Trent's pants, tossing them to him.
"You tell anyone what happened I'll kill every one you've ever cared about...got that?"
Trent's eyes drifted to the side. "Why don't you just kill me?"
The driver chuckled. He got back in his car and drove off, leaving Trent there in the nude, standing in the rain. Trent picked up the pants and put them on. Trent knew where he was. It was about fifteen miles from his house. But Trent had no purpose in returning home. He never wanted to return to that hellhole. So Trent gripped what little of his shirt was left and wrapped it around him, trying to stay warm. He walked to the lake that was by the park and sat down in the rain. His life meant nothing now. How could he go on living? Every day just got harder, and harder.
Trent sat there as the rain fell across his face like a gentle hand caressing his cheek. The tears for his pain finally came, forming slowly at first but then turned to a full-fledged water show. He had never known that sweet feeling of love. There was one girl at school that liked him, but he couldn't go out with her. He was too afraid that he would just ruin her life too. Trent just sobbed uncontrollably, not wanting to live anymore.
How can I go on living? My parents have taken everything from me. No more art, writing, no nothing. Friends are never aloud to come over. My friends are too much of a disgrace to be in our house. Hell, I'm too much of a disgrace to be in my house, Trent thought.
Trent decided that it wasn't worth thinking over. He saw no use in it anyway. There was no hope for him. Hell, he didn't even have hope for himself. It just seems like things come and go, for people time turns for the better. But for him it's always leaving. Never once had he had someone that respected him or knew who he was. He was Trent. He was different. He didn't need the cool kids to be his friends, even though that's what his dad wanted him to do. He liked hanging out with the friends he had found. The ones his dad was ashamed of, but more, Trent was ashamed to show them what a real ass his dad was.
Even now he sit here, staring at this lake, thinking, 'how did my life end up like this? Why did I have to be the one that was put on a rope and left tied up to something just far enough away from what I wanted?' But still, he couldn't go back. He had made the right chose in his head. Never to see the ones that he loved or the ones that cared about him. It just seemed better.
'I mean honestly, It's not like it's the first time that I've thought about running away. Just look at me, suicide has even crossed my mind a couple of times,' Trent thought. Though, sometimes he wished that things were different, that he had an actual dad that loved him. Instead of someone that he looked at and only see disgust, disappointment, and hatred. You could just see it in his eyes. Those eyes that stare coldly back at you when you try and show them something that you accomplished and then say good job, but what they're thinking is 'wow that sucks and you could have done so much better on it.'
'Am I being cold to the man that claims that he loves me? Hell, I'm being nice compared to the things he's said to me. I just don't get it. How can I be related to that...that...that vile thing? And then there's mom. Who knows that something is wrong with me but I'm just too scared to tell her what it is. Why should I be afraid though? She loves me right? But then again that's what he tells me too. Maybe they'll miss me. Though I doubt it. I don't think they really give a damn whether I'm gone or not. I mean, hell, it's not like God is on my side', he thought
It's become so cold out now that he was starting to go numb. But the numbness felt good, just another helping factor that made him not feel alive. He just wished that he could kill his dad and get away with it. Trent chuckle.
'The lake looks like a good place to sleep,' Trent thought
"Maybe someone will notice me then," he whispered.
So he got up and slowly made his way to the lake. He shivered when the water hit him at first but then got use to it. It was nice. The numbness was picking up. Soon he would be unconscious and forever away from this damned world. The water was finally at his waist and he could feel the water drawing him in deeper.
'Mmm,' he thought, 'death.'
Close to a quarter the way in he laid down, submerging his head under the water. Not long after the air from his lungs was gone and he was breathing in water.
'I hope you fucking care about me know,' was his last thoughts before he passed out.
* * * *
That next morning Trent's mom was watching the news.
"This morning a seven-teen-year-old male white wolf was dragged out of Lake Rube. By the looks of it the police say that he was raped. Though the rapist did not kill him, the police say. They said that they found footprints saying that he walked into the lake and killed himself. Wait...this just in. they have identified the body as the body of Trent William Clamer..." the TV went on to described more of the horrific details, but Trent's mom wasn't listening.
She had gasped and spilled her coffee on the floor. She couldn't believe what she just heard.
"My baby," she whispered.
Trent's dad was standing in the doorway over watching.
"Good riddance," he mumbled out.