Pluviophiles and Petrichor: Chapter 3
#3 of Pluviophiles and Petrichor
Merry Christmas. 7.5k words.
I opened my eyes. The world around me was cloaked in the grey of a cloudy morning, as per Oregon norm. What had awoken me was the sound of a key fob slipping into the slot on the door, followed by the entry of one very hung over armadillo, who shuffled in as if moving through molasses.
He looked around and, seeing his bed was take up by a massive grey dragon, looked over to me. He looked like he was still slightly drunk.
"He ssspent the night?"
I sat up in bed, nodding. "It's a long story. We didn't fuck or anything. Want to hear it?"
He put a paw between his eyes and squeezed the bridge of his nose softly, indicating he had a headache. "Give me the short version.."
I kept my voice low. "He wouldn't leave, I went to the graveyard. He followed me. I intended to ditch him in the dark, but he sprained his ankle and I discovered I couldn't just leave him there, despite the fact that it was his fault in the first place for coming along. I half carried him back here, got him some ice, and told him to go to sleep."
The armadillo blinked slowly. "H'might need crutches. You sure it aint broken?"
I nodded. "Positive. How was the party?"
The armadillo grunted once, stepping inside and sitting at his desk. "Party? What party.. Ugh, my head..."
I furrowed my brow. "Where exactly did you end up sleeping last night?"
He laid his head against the cool desk and let out another grunt, then a sigh. "Dunno. Jus woke up 'n walked."
I shook my head and got up, opening the blinds. My roommate groaned loudly and made an attempt to shield his eyes. That groan was all it took to wake up Gerrard, who yawned and rubbed at his eyes, sitting up in bed.
The blankets had fallen off the top half of his body, and I looked away. "What time is it..?"
I grabbed my phone and checked. "Half past seven."
He grumbled. "On a weekend? Jeez... Did Andrew ever come back?"
I scoffed and motioned towards his desk. The dragon, per usual, had his eyes trained on me the entire time, and didn't even notice the hungover armadillo at the desk.
Gerrard looked over and immediately became concerned. "Oh. Hey Andrew, how was the party?" All he got in terms of a response was a prolonged, angry groan. He looked back at me. "When did he get in?"
I had busied myself with getting dressed while the dragon was distracted, slipping on a black T-shirt and some skinny jeans. I didn't turn back to look at him. "Just now. He's hungover pretty bad, I'm guessing. He told me he didn't remember any party at all. Guessing he got smashed."
Gerrard grinned widely. "Finally got himself fubar'd, did he? Proud of him."
I quirked an ear to the side, looking back at the dragon, who was out of bed and putting his clothes on. He was built. Beautiful pecs, a screaming eight pack, a powerful, thick tail, and legs that would put most runners to shame. His chest scales, surprisingly, were black, and extended down his abs and ran along the underside of his tail. He wore what, on normal people, would have been a modest pair of black and grey plaid boxers. His body, however, annihilated any modesty that they conveyed, and it almost seemed like Gerrard was flaunting what he had.
I cleared my head and asked the question that had been on my tongue. "What does 'fubar'd' mean?"
The dragon put on his pants and grinned at me again, doing up the buckle on his belt. "Fucked up beyond all recognition."
"I see." A strange feature on the back of the dragon's shirt had me curious again. There were two holes near the shoulderblades, oval in shape, but with some kind of elastic band, along with a mini sleeve. Travelling from the lower part of them, down to the shirt's hem, were a pair of currently unzipped zippers, one on either side. "What's with your shirt?"
He didn't look back at me this time. "For my wings, ya nincompoop. You think normal shirts would work for me with these things coming out my back?" He ducked under the shirt and I saw that his wings did indeed fit through the holes. "Can you zip me up? Hard to reach, and I don't think that Andrew's going to be able to do anything for a while."
I nodded without thinking and did up the zippers on his back. "Sure."
He turned and gave me another grin. "Thanks."
I looked away quickly, averting his gaze. My eyes settled on poor Andrew. How he even got back to the dorm was beyond the scope of my imagination, but I knew we'd have to leave while he got some rest. "Help me get him in bed," I said, moving over and rousing my roommate.
He stirred, angrily. "Wat. Watya want."
I put a paw under his arm and motioned with my head for Gerrard to get the other one. "We're getting you into bed. Be thankful."
He writhed for a short while. "But I wasss already asleeeeep! Guh."
I growled at him. "You'd have an awful crick in your neck if you fell asleep doubled over your desk like that, moron. Come on!" We heaved him up and put the 'dillo beneath the covers.
"Smells like dragon," he grumbled. The comment made me take a deep breath and I realized that the whole room pretty much smelled like dragon. The bed, however, must have been absolutely musky. I banished the thought and grabbed Andrew's empty water container, knowing that the poor guy'd be thirsty when he woke up.
Gerrard gave the 'dillo's shoulder a small punch. "Be happy it's warm. Besides, you won't smell it when you're asleep." He reached over and closed the blinds. "And you can just take a shower when you finally get up." He looked over to me. "Where're you off to?"
I had my paw on the door pawle, one paw already outside. My tail flicked in annoyance as I glanced back and held up the large water bottle. "Getting our mutual problem some water. That's what you're supposed to do when your roommate gets smashed, right? Make sure they have water and then leave them alone until they don't hate everything anymore."
"Oh. Yeah, I think so."
I rolled my eyes. "May I leave now, commander?"
His mouth split into a grin again. "Aye, soldier. Get this man some water."
I scowled and closed the door, taking care to not let it close on my tail on the way out. Halfway down the hall, though, I heard my door open and close once more, and soon the dragon was walking beside me cheerily.
"What made you decide to join me," I asked, flatly. I tried to keep my voice low; I didn't want to wake anyone up. We turned the corner and continued.
He continued walking with me, although he was limping due to his ankle. I didn't slow down. "Just didn't want you to get a chance to get away from me is all. You could have gotten the water and just left the container outside, and I'd have been none the wiser until ten minutes later or something, giving you plenty of time to slip away."
My tail lashed the air once in annoyance. He'd known. "Why do you insist on following me, and not leaving me alone?"
He chuckled. "Because I know that if you ever got away, there's very little chance that I could catch you, and an even lower chance that you would come back."
I sighed and muttered sarcastically, looking down at my paws as I walked. "Gee, I wonder why?"
We reached the filtered water station near the grand stairway of my building and filled up Andrew's bottle, turning around and heading back.
My tail lashed again and I growled in annoyance. "Don't you have somewhere to be? People who are worried about you? Anything that would draw you away from me? Studying? Homework? Anything?"
He put his paws behind his head as we walked, smirking. He smelled musky. "Nope~. Nothing for the whole weekend."
I put my free paw over my nose, even though I didn't really mind the smell, and scowled. "How about a shower?"
He looked up at the lights we were passing under, then turned around to face me, grabbing the paw I had over my nose and holding it in both of his own. "Are you asking me to shower with you?" He said, seriously.
I reflexively jerked my paw out of his grip, startled. I tried to keep my voice down, but I was basically whisper-yelling. "What? No! I'm saying you reek! You stink! You smell! You're musky and you need a bath!" I shook my head and continued walking, completely annoyed. My almost whip-like tail lashed the air once more, however this time it caught him in his uninjured leg. He jerked it up in response with a slight yelp, before covering his mouth. It was still seven fifty in the morning, on a Saturday. Most people would rather stay in bed than be awoken by a startled dragon in the hallway.
He hobbled back to me as quickly as his ankle would let him. "Okay! Geez, it was a joke. Don't take it so seriously. In all honesty it's not a bad idea."
I kept my eyes forward and turned the corner again, nearing my room once more. "I don't like jokes very much. Especially when they concern me."
He put his paws up defensively. "Alright, alright. I get it. No jokes."
I remained silent until we got back to my room. Setting my roommate's filled water bottle on the nightstand next to where he lay in bed, I walked to his dresser. After rummaging about for a bit, I threw one of Andrew's clean towels to Gerrard. "Take this and go shower, otherwise we'll never get the smell of you out of this room," I grimaced.
He grinned at me. "Alright, but only if you come with me and shower at the same time, otherwise I'm staying right here." My fur stood up on end, making my mane puff out.
I turned around and lunged at him then, laying my ears back, baring my teeth, and retracting my claws, putting them up threateningly with a roar. He backed up, paws raised once again as he bumped into the door, caught completely off guard by my aggression. "Woah, woah, woah! Calm down! I didn't mean together! I meant that you and I take our showers at the same time! Not together, I repeat,not together!" I had stopped myself just short from rearranging the dragon's facial features. Andrew stirred on the bed, mumbling something about pineapples and how they didn't go in the coconuts.
"Mm.. Pineapples don't go in the coconut, Professor Hefway... Limes do... and then you shake it all up, not stir."
The soft sound of humming could be heard from the slumbering armadillo.
I lowered my claws, but my mane remained fluffed out, and I glared at him intensely. I kept my claws out as a warning to him, and grabbed my own towel, along with my shampoos and conditioners. I had one set for my body fur, and then another one for my mane and tail tuft.
"Let it be known that you annoy me greatly, and that, if it were not illegal for me to fulfill the prerequisite, you'd have to order a new face from a plastic surgeon, you fucking gecko."
The dragon scratched the back of his neck, looking down apologetically. "I'm sorry, okay? I didn't think you'd react that way."
I snarled at him again, opening the door. "Just remember that I don't know how much longer I'll be able to resist temptation."
We walked to the public bathrooms, Gerrard keeping a respectable distance behind me, and selected different stalls. He took the handicap one out of what I guessed was necessity, seeing as how getting the dragon's huge frame into one of the normal stalls would have proven difficult. They were by no means small, it was the dragon who was huge.
The shower stalls looked like toilets from the outside, each one separated with a large wall, along with a door that locks via sliding a bar until it catches inside a slot on the opposite side of the wall. In this space there was a small bench to set things on, and the shower behind it. Despite the door being there, the showers themselves still had curtains, and as I disrobed and closed them behind me, starting the water, I idly wondered if Gerrard was tall enough to look over and see me from the tops of the little cubicles. I stood up as high as I could and looked over, only to see the head of the huge dragon looking back, a wide grin on his face.
I scowled and let myself go back down. He wasn't even trying to make himself taller, and he could look over the dividers with ease. I was momentarily glad I picked the stall furthest from him.
~~~~~
I had showered as quickly as I could, even though it still took a long time to shampoo and condition both my body and my mane, and it was with a sigh of frustration that Gerrard's water turned off merely seconds after I had turned off mine.
He called out to me as I was towelling off within the room with the tiny bench. "Enjoy your soak?"
I scowled and replied. "Thought I'd be able to outpace you and get out of here before you could finish."
That got a laugh from him. "Sorry to disappoint you, but scales dry a lot faster than fur, and they're easier to wash, too! You should think about getting some."
I glared at the floor and continued drying. Finding myself to be adequately dried off from my towel, I unlatched the stall door and walked over to one of the two fur-drying machines installed in the dorm. This building was new, having only been finished one month before the students returned, and it had not been neglected in terms of accoutrements.
Taking my towel off after checking to make sure that Gerrard was still in his stall, I turned on the drier. Warm, scented air blew up from holes in the paneling of the floor, as well as the three walls of the unit. I turned around slowly, making sure that my back and everything got hit by the pleasantly warm air.
I cranked up the heat and closed my eyes, murring blissfully as the air cocooned me in warmth, driving any excess water from my thick pelt. The machine was noisy, yes, however it was so worth it. I curled my toes and arched my back a little, standing up as straight as I could, letting the air hit every part of my body. I had actually stood there for a good three or four minutes before finally opening my eyes and turning the machine off, turning around, and instantly getting the happy smile torn right off my face.
Gerrard had left his stall under the noisy cover of the machine and had stood there with Andrew's towel about his waist, watching me as I'd dried off. No doubt he'd seen everything, and it pissed me off.
I glared at him, growling. "Fucking pervert..."
He shook his head. "I actually wanted to see what you looked like when smiling."
"I'm not buying that," I said. He held up my towel and I nearly ripped it from his hands. "Fuck off."
I wrapped it around my waist and hurriedly got dressed within the shower stall, packing up my sets of shampoos and conditioners. Gerrard was waiting for me outside the stall when I opened it.
He had a solemn look on his face, and it actually seemed like the jock was deep in thought. I had walked to the door and put a paw on the handle when he suddenly looked up at me. He spoke softly.
"You're beautiful, you know. When your face isn't stained with hatred and pain, you're absolutely gorgeous."
I stood there, shaking, breathing heavily. He stepped forward and cupped my cheek with one of his paws, tilting my head up to look him in the eyes. His eyes were a beautiful, mossy green. The color of leaves after a good rain. The look in his eyes... The care, the concern. It brought back flashbacks of a certain wolf. The heat between him and myself. The look in his eyes whenever he'd gaze tenderly at me. The pain of having my heart torn out and ripped to pieces. I backed up a step, the door pressing against my back. I felt trapped.
"Who hurt you so badly to make you so full of hatred, Axio..? What did they do to you?"
He'd moved closer, to try and hold me close to him and comfort me, to try and learn why I was the way I was, and maybe to try and learn how to heal me.
I can recall what happened next very well, in excruciating detail. His words infuriated me. My vision clouded over with red, and I felt nothing but seething, roiling rage. I saw in front of me not him, but the wolf who had caused me so much pain. My anger manifested itself in a roar of pure anguish, and I vaguely remember tears spilling down my face. My claws came out, and next thing I knew, the dragon's cheek was ribboned, blossoming with red. He stumbled backwards, hitting the wall, and slid down it, eyes wide.
I stepped toward him, panting, pupils narrowed to slits and teeth bared. My clawed paw was raised, and my entire body shook from my anger. Out of what might have been a cursory glance at my paw, I saw that my claws had blood on them. A bead of crimson liquid rolled down one of my fingers and hit the floor with a small patter.
The small sound of that drop of blood shook me out of my trance. The redness in my vision left me, and I came back to my senses. I looked back at Gerrard, who was staring at me as if I were a monster, about to claim his life. His cheek was scarlet, four long gashes sweeping along with his jawline, all the way from his ear to the tip of his snout, were weeping softly. Their burgundy tears were travelling down Gerrard's neck, and I backed away in horror, dropping my towel and its contained fur products on the ground.
All rage left me. All the pain evaporated. I looked back at my paw, then once again to Gerrard's bleeding visage. His handsome face was marred, because of me. Fresh tears welled up in my eyes, the guilt washing over my body in waves as the saltwater fled from my body.
I gave one shattered, broken cry of guilt and pain. A mixture of a sob and a cough as my face twisted up in grief and regret for what I had done left my lips and hit the tiled floor with a crack.
I turned, opened the door, and ran.
I was horrified.
Horrified of myself, and what I had done. Horrified of Gerrard, and how he'd gotten that reaction out of me. Horrified of the confirmation of the idea that I was utterly unfit to love anyone, ever again.
All I'd ever done is hurt people, when all they had been trying to do was help.
Gerrard called out after me from within the bathroom, and I could hear him scrambling to pick up my things. I ran down the hallway, not caring how loud I was, and burst into my room. I grabbed my phone, wallet, and keys, and left before the door could even swing shut.
I ran, nearly killing myself as I almost flew down the grand stairway, and bolted out the door, leaving my dorm behind.
My muscles burned, my lungs ached. I had never been incredibly physical, and this was the first time I'd put myself to running in a while. All of my body's complaints, however, were muted in comparison to the wall of grief that had stricken me.
Back there was all my proof. I truly was a horrible person. All he'd wanted to do was help me, and I struck him down without so much as a thought.
I cried openly, my breath puffing out in front of me as I ran, only to be left behind in my wake. Some people watched as I ran by, staring. I didn't care.
I ran until I hit the graveyard, my one place of sanctuary, recently tainted by my experience with Gerrard, only this was the first time I had ever visited during the day.
Regardless of how well-lit the path was, though, my muscles were screaming at me to stop. I had ignored them for too long, though, and as I turned off the path as to avoid running through a small, gravestone-filled clearing, I slipped on a frozen puddle and the earth came rushing up to meet me.
I hit the ground with a thud, and thank goodness my tongue wasn't outside my mouth when I had fallen, otherwise I'd have bitten it off as my chin slammed into the dirt. I remained conscious, but I curled into a ball, laying on my side, and stayed there, trembling. My arms were linked together behind my knees, my face buried between my legs as I just shook violently, my body wracked with sobs.
How could I have done that... What kind of person does that? The first time in years anyone had shown the slightest bit of interest in me... no, quite a lot of interest in me... And I slashed their face up.
I uncurled from my space on the forest floor after what seemed like an eternity and crawled into the clearing. My body resisted, bruises and sore muscles in a symphony of pain rising up from my bones and singing in my brain. I ignored them and continued, crawling into the center of the clearing, among the mossy gravestones, and laid down on my back, spread eagle to the sky. The clouds looked like they would let loose, soon. It wouldn't be bad, but it would wet the ground.
I stared at the sky, feeling as dead as the people buried beneath me, and as hopeless as the sun trying to break through the barrier of clouds..
"He probably won't ever want to talk to you again," I said, to no one in particular. The trees whispered back to me, swaying softly in the wind.
"He probably hates you. Thinks you're a freak." My words hurt, the whole scenario hurt. The memories, my body, his body, my heart.
"Did you see the way he was looking at you before you left?" Tears welled up in the corners of my yellow eyes. My ears flattened against my skull.
"He thinks you're a monster," I said. It was at that moment that I wanted nothing more than for the sky to inexplicably fall, thus killing me.
I closed my eyes and waited for it to happen. I waited. I hoped. I prayed to a god I didn't believe in to simply kill me where I laid.
After a while I gave up, and simply played through my mind all the ways it could have gone differently. I could have pushed him away gently, not hurting him, and gone about my day. He'd probably have followed me out to get breakfast. My stomach growled softly at the thought of food.
I could have done nothing, and let him try to comfort me, let him try and see just what laid beneath the surface of my personality. He knew now anyways, but he still wouldn't have gotten hurt.
I could... I could have leaned into him. I could have told him everything. I could have let him into my heart, or at least given him the first of many keys required. Maybe more as time went on.
But how long could it have lasted if I did...?
Someone better would have come along.
He would lose interest.
He would have broken my heart, regardless.
Letting people into your heart will hurt you in the end. Friends move. Pets die. People grow old and even though their body is with you, their minds may have packed up and left long ago. Dying before someone else doesn't help, then it's just you hurting them.
Everyone who ever gets close to you eventually distances themselves. That is the cold, hard truth. be it by their own will, or by something out of their control, they will leave you, and you will end up hurt.
It made sense in my mind. It always had.
Always.
I closed my eyes and waited for death to take me. I decided that I would wait until I starved, or until the world had mercy on me and ended my pitiful existence preemptively.
~~~~~
The sound of wingbeats drew me out of my dozing and the sound made me smile.
I'd thought the wingbeats were death, come to take me from this world that was much too good for me, and send me to hell where I belonged. They were massive wingbeats, and I smiled wider when I felt them powerfully blasting air against my body. They were descending, and I awaited them.
But no. They did not belong to death.
The sound of something landing next to me made me open my eyes, my smile dissolving.
Above me, there was the face of a very concerned dragon, with gashes across his face, crusted over with dried blood.
My eyes widened as I recognized Gerrard, and as he bent down gingerly to try and get closer to me, I panicked. So afraid of hurting him again was I, that, despite my body's complaints and groans, I rolled away from him, getting up into a squat with my back against a tombstone.
My mind flipped through all the possibilities as to why on earth he would be here, having found me. My mind settled on the most probably thing.
Revenge.
He was here to make even with me, I reasoned. I looked down, ears drooping, tail flagging, and lowered my guard, collapsing my tired body against the tombstone.
"Do your worst..." I said, softly.
He got up and stepped forward. I kept my eyes on the ground right in front of me. His feet soon came into my field of view, and I tensed up, waiting for the pain to begin. But no. No pain came.
Instead, Gerrard knelt down in front of me. I closed my eyes, waiting.
I felt arms encircle my body, and I tensed up so much I was shaking, trembling with fear.
He pulled me close. His body against mine, his arms around me. The smell of dragon playing in my senses.
I didn't understand. Why was he not hitting me? Why didn't I hurt?
He squeezed me gently before pulling back, holding onto me by my shoulders. I opened my eyes. The left side of his face was a mess.
Our gazes locked.
"Axio," he said, softly. "Are you okay?"
My bottom lip trembled, and I looked up at him, mouth slightly agape. Tears welled up in the corners of my eyes again.
"What..?"
"Are you okay? Are you hurt?" He asked again.
"N-no... I... why?" I sniffed loudly.
"Why what?" I couldn't stop staring into his eyes. They were beautiful.
"Why are you here?" The tears were rolling down my cheeks now, following the trails their predecessors previously dampened.
"I came here, looking for you. I figured you'd be here."
I balked. He was insane. "But... look. Look at what I did to you! I hurt you... I hurt you." I brought up my shaking right paw, and made almost as if to touch the wounds on his face. To touch them. To try and make them better. But then, seeing his blood mirrored from his face to my hand, I stopped it, putting it back down by my side. I let out a sob, crying quietly.
He smiled softly, and I worried that his cuts might reopen. They stayed sealed, though. "I'll be fine... Besides. I'm not hurt one tenth as badly as you are. Your wounds still bleed, even though they were made years ago."
We stayed quiet for some time, and I broke our gaze to stare at the ground beneath us and cry.
He reached forward and scooped me up, lifting me into a standing position. I leaned against him, crying, my paws on his chest, claws sheathed. His arms were around me, warming my back. They made me feel safe. Images and memories of that wolf flashed in my mind again, and I shook, crying once more.
He leaned down and nuzzled my head, one of his paws gently rubbing my back. "I am so, so, unimaginably sorry. I didn't know."
We stood there, in the clearing with its mossy tombstones, as the sky opened above us, and finally let go of its rain.
"Come on," he said. "Let's get out of the rain."
I nodded softly. My heart was a wreck, my mind was a wreck. I still wanted to die.
We walked into the trees and sat ourselves down underneath one, where we hoped to stay dry.
I sniffed and rubbed my eyes, sitting across from him. "You have nothing to be sorry for, Gerrard. I'm a monster."
He reached out and enclosed my paw in his own. "You're not a monster, Axio."
I wrenched my paw out of his grip, sobbing. "Yes, I am! Look at what I did! Your face is going to scar over, and it's all my fault!"
He scooted closer to me. "Hey. Listen. Did you genuinely think about hurting me? Did you make the conscious decision to do this to my face, Axio? Look at me." I looked up into his eyes.
"I want you to tell me... whether or not you chose to do this," he said.
I growled at him, ears splaying back. "Of course I didn't! But it happened anyways! You tried to give me a hug and I fucking slapped you with my claws out!"
"Because you were afraid! You were scared. I pushed you too far, and you reacted. And for that, I am truly sorry. I didn't know just how hurt you were until then. Andrew had told me that you play hard to get. I can tell by what's happened now, though, that it's a lot more than that. It's more than that. I want to help you, please. Just give me a chance."
It was absurd. "You're asking me to give you a chance. To let you love me, or fix me, or whatever the fuck you think you want to do, to try and make me better?"
He nodded, smiling softly. "Yes."
I turned away. "That's exactly what _he_wanted, too. He got down on his knees and demanded that I let him love me, and look at what happened to me. I'm all fucked up in the head and the heart."
"Who's 'he'?" Gerrard asked.
I sniffed and rubbed my eyes, continuing to look away. "My first love. Freshman year of high school. He demanded I let him love me, and it lasted for three years. He finally broke up with me, saying he was straight all along, and revealing that he had been cheating for a year and a half of our relationship. I'd given him my virginity, and planned my life out with him. He broke my world."
The words hurt. The memories hurt. I was a bundle of pain wrapped in barbed wire, hurting all the time, and hurting anyone who tried to unwrap me.
Gerrard shook his head. "I'm so sorry... I don't mean it like that. Just... give me a chance. I won't leave you like that, I promise."
It was my turn to shake my head now. "I can't do that. Not yet."
The dragon huffed. "Then... then at least try not to treat me like shit whenever I'm around, okay? I know it's all an act, one to stop people from getting close to you. You do it so that they don't have a chance to hurt you. I understand. I've been there."
I scoffed. "How could you possibly know how I feel. You, of all people. Gorgeous, handsome, muscular. How could you ever understand what I'm feeling."
Gerrard took a deep breath, letting it out as a slow sigh. "I was raped when I was eight by my older brother. He was sixteen. He called me into his room when our parents were away, having just been dumped by his girlfriend. He got behind me, blocked the door, and demanded that I strip. I didn't know what was happening... But he got himself hard and took it out on me. It hurt so much. I wanted him to stop, but he didn't. I didn't tell anyone, and he knew that I wouldn't. I was scared of him. It went on for a few months, when finally my parents came home early one day and heard me screaming in pain. They opened the door and found my brother, knot deep in me and busting a nut. They called the police. I'd loved my brother a great deal. When we were growing up, he was the person I went to when I needed help with something, since our parents were away most of the time. He was the person who walked me to school, cooked me breakfast, and packed my lunches. And he betrayed me like that. That's how I know how you feel, Axio."
I remained silent, a paw having gone over my mouth as I had listened to him recount his story. I felt ashamed. My pain was so petty compared to his. I was petty.
"He was hauled off by police officers within the hour, and his trial was held with me as prime witness. He was charged with thirty-seven counts of rape, and sentenced to life in prison without chance of parole. For the longest time, I was a scared kid. I wouldn't trust anyone. I didn't let anyone do anything for me. If they tried, I'd throw a fit. I was put into therapy, and my therapist helped drag me out from that dark place I'd withdrawn to. It took two and a half years, but I'm out of there. I know you can be drawn out of there, too. Just please, Axio." He took my paw in his own once again. "Give me a chance."
My bottom lip started to tremble again, and I threw myself into his arms, against every muscle and bone in my body telling me not to.
"Why?" I asked him, after a while of us just sitting there, holding each other.
"Because, despite what the cynics try to say, there _are_people in the world who want to do nothing more than help someone else, even if it doesn't benefit them at all. That, and I knew from the moment I saw your face freed from your own demons, that there's still hope for you. We can do this, together. You and me."
I swallowed. "Are you sure you want to waste time and energy on someone like me, though?"
He frowned. "What makes you say that?"
I looked down again. "I don't think I'm worth it."
He shrugged. "Then we'll just have to remember that your opinions are shitty. I think you're worth it, and I'm the one who asked you, remember?"
I kept my head down, studying an ant crawling across a leaf.
What, in reality, did I really have to lose..?
"... Okay."
He smiled at that, and drew me close to him again. I didn't understand why he didn't hate me, but I wasn't going to count my blessings.
~~~~~
We walked back to the campus through the rain, which, light as it was, still managed to wash most of the blood off of Gerrard's face, once he gave it a few gentle rubs. I kept my eyes to the ground as he did, ashamed of them despite having been forgiven earlier.
When we got to my dorm, though, we could hear the sound of arguing coming from the third floor. Both voices sounded vaguely familiar, although one I could not easily put a face to. Going up the grand stairway, the indistinguishable sounds of arguing turned into actual words.
"... telling you, I. Don't. Know where Axio went! They were gone by the time I fell asleep!" Andrew yelled.
The answering voice sounded... well... Scottish. "'An I'm tellin' you that I don' care! I'm 'is friend, and I'm jet-lagged as all hell! Let me in!" Apparently the accent got very thick when angered.
Gerrard and I turned the corner and were greeted with a somewhat... strange sight.
A blue and white wolf, somewhat reminiscent of Lobo from Animal Crossing in terms of coloration, as well as temperament, was standing outside my door, yelling at Andrew with two suitcases behind him. He was well-built. Not nearly as built as Gerrard was, but definitely fit. I tried putting my paw on just who that voice belonged to, when suddenly it hit me.
"Yeager?" I called, tentatively.
The blue-white wolf's head turned, and his muzzle split into a wide and happy grin upon seeing me. He raised a paw in greeting.
"Oi! There you are. Tell your bloody roommate to let me in!"
Gerrard looked at me. "Friend of yours?"
I nodded. "Yeah. But he's a couple thousand miles away from home."
I walked up to the two and gave the wolf a big hug. "What on earth are you doing here in the States, wuff?"
He smiled brightly and shrugged. "I saved up the coin and figured I'd just pop on by to say hello. Is this a bad time?"
I shook my head, motioning to Andrew to let the three of us inside. He was dressed, and I assumed that he was just about to go out or something when ambushed by the friendly -- and easily agitated -- wolf.
"I'm going out... got to go sign some pap- The fuck happened to your face?" Andrew's eyes were wide, trained on the dragon's soon-to-be-scars.
"It's... a long story," he said, scratching the back of his neck.
"Who did it?"
I spoke up, quietly. "I did..."
Andrew looked from Gerrard to me, and then back to Gerrard again. "It's too early in the morning for this." He then proceeded to walk out.
"He must still be hungover," the dragon whispered. "He's normally not this crabby."
Yeager piped up. "I'd be angry too if I smelled like dragon for no reason. Hang on..." The wolf sniffed the air inside the room, gently motioning for me to move out of the way before following his nose. That sensitive sniffer led him right to... well... Gerrard's underarm. Yeager gave a long sniff, tail wagging wildly, before backing away. His tongue was lolling out slightly. "Hoo! Ax, you didn't tell me your roommate was gay! Even less that he had such a stud for a mate!"
I just started laughing, moving inside and sitting down at my desk. Of all the people I knew, Andrew had to be the straightest. "Th-they're not actually together, Yeags. Andrew came back totally smashed after Gerrard here spent the night in his bed. We put him to bed, got him some water, and then-" I paused, thinking. "We went out," I finished, lamely.
The wolf's tail was still wagging. I had to admit, the dragon's musk was rather... exotic. And tickled all the right places, but I at least had some restraint.
"Fun. So, how'd you get them crazy clawmarks?" He motioned towards Gerrard's face.
I told him about how, over the past day, Gerrard had been sticking with me, and how he had tried to comfort me in the bathroom, followed by me nearly ripping his face off. I'd tell you guys how the story went, but you already read it.
When we were done, though, Yeager slowly stood up from Andrew's chair, and growled softly at Gerrard.
"Scuse me Gerrard, but I think yer gonna havta leave for a little while."
Gerrard tilted his head. "Beg your pardon?"
The wolf cracked his knuckles. "I don't care if ye'v made-up with Ax here, now ya gotta deal with me. From what he told me, ye'v been downright creepy to him. Followin him and shit. I don't care if all's swell tween you two now, I don't take kindly to people who hurt my friends. Regardless of how nice you might smell."
The dragon smirked softly. "And what makes you think you can ask that of me? I'm welcome to stay here as long as I want, right Axio?"
I looked between the two, and pretended to pull a zipper across my mouth. Not. Touching. That.
Yeager cracked his neck once or twice. "Ax, get the door. I'll muscle him out if I have to."
I nodded, opening the door, while Gerrard just stood in front of it and laughed. "No offense, Yeager, but I'm quite a bit bigger than you. I'm also a football player; I know how to handle being tack-- UGHLD!" The wolf had rammed into the dragon's stomach, wrapping his arms around his midsection, and lifted him off the ground, all the while growling roughly. His tackle ended up carrying the dragon out the door with him, knocking the back of Gerrard's head against the doorframe and stunning him. Yeager turned ninety degrees in the hallway and bodyslammed the dragon, clapping his hands off afterwards.
"'An I play rugby, bitch." Yeager closed the door behind him after coming back inside, locking it behind him.
Yeager was only just as tall as me, maybe an inch shorter than my own 6'5" height, and seeing him literally _throw_Gerrard really put his strength into perspective. He sat down with me once again.
"Was that really necessary...?" I asked him, before shockingly realizing that I actually felt concern for the huge dragon. I don't feel concern easily.
"Made you cry, didn't he? Made you feel threatened enough that you went and minced his face. Most intelligent people would have realized that either their presence wasn't wanted, or what they were doing was undesirable at that point. He didn't. I taught him a lesson. On a more important note though, did he hurt you anywhere, Ax? Are you alright?"
I nodded. "Y-yeah. I'm fine. Just a little relieved that Gerrard's finally not here anymore." Truth be told an infinitesimally small part of me actually missed him, but it was far outweighed by the part of me that felt relief.
"Good. I'll keep him away from you if you want." The wolf wagged his tail and flexed an arm, putting a paw on the bicep. "Got all the muscle you'd ever need, right here."
I smiled softly. "Thanks, wuff."
I should probably explain Yeager. He was my Scottish penpal, having met a few years ago on a website called 'Chatango'. We keep in contact over Skype, and we play League of Legends together occasionally.
"What are you doing in America, anyways? Just a whim?"
The wolf nodded. "Pretty much. I always said I'd come visit you one day, and here I am."
I shrugged. "How long do you stay?"
He put a paw on his chin and thought for a minute. "Eh, as long as transfer students stay, I guess. I flew in this morning, actually. You know how early I had to wake up? Still dark out, fuck. Transat-fucking-lantic. D'you have a place where I can stay, by any chance?"
I pursed my lips. "Actually, I'm not sure. Andrew and I don't have much space..."
The wolf waved a paw. "Oh, don't worry about all that. You know those papers he said he had to sign? They were for a room transfer. Told me so himself."
My eyes widened, and I looked down a little, disappointed. I'd thought I had a friend in Andrew. Guess not.
"Yep," the wolf continued. "Said he had some buddies who wanted to room with him, they just got an open slot or something."
I put the mask back on, the prickliness returning slowly. "That's great for him. Glad he's going somewhere he'd be happier."
"Yeah, me too, only I actually benefit from it by getting a place to crash," he grinned.
"Did you apply for a student exchange program or something?"
"Mhmm. Speaking of which, you know a place where we can grab a bite to eat? I'm starved."
I tilted my head. "Yeah, but Gerrard will probably follow us."
He waved a paw dismissively. "Doesn't matter, he can't take me, really."
I shrugged. "Whatever."