FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

My name is Eric and I am a trader by profession.

One job I took was going to lead me from Proskur along a road by the marsh of Tun, up into the Stormhorn mountains and on to Arabel.

The delivery was some magic items, small enough that I could carry them in my backpack. They were mostly rings.

My trip started uneventful enough. The walking was easy along the marsh. But then the road turned east and approached the Stormhorn mountains. When I got close, I was a little shocked at what I saw. The road had quite a great deal of switchbacks in order to get up the mountain side. I sighed, and pressed on.

Every once in a while, as I ascended the switchbacks, I took a break and had a sip from my canteen and a little morsel of food from my stores.

I finally made it to the top, only to be greeted by the sight of just as many switchbacks going down the other side. It had taken me an entire day just to get to the mountain, another to ascend the switchbacks, and here in front of me is another set which would take me just as long to go down.

I was beginning to get worried. I had not planned for the road to be so long thanks to the switchbacks. I was running out of water and food. And what was worse, is that I never saw even the slightest stream as I was crossing the mountain, in order to refill my canteen.

Once I had gotten down the east side switchbacks, I had noticed that I had run out of water and food stores. And I was beginning to feel worrying fatigued.

I found a small field of inviting grass separated from the road and looking up at another one of the mountains in the Stormhorns range.

I decided to sit down against a tree, with my backpack between my back and the tree. I sat there gasping for air. My fatigue was not improving. Without water or food I would never make it to Arabel.

I sat there for what must have been several hours.

Then all of a sudden, the ground around me started to shake. I thought it could be an earthquake? No this had a regular cadence to it and earthquakes do not do that. And then I notice something else. It sounded like someone humming. It was a rather jolly tune which I eventually recognized as an old folk tune called "Across The Western Sea".

And then I saw it. The site made my veins run cold. It was an extremely large red dragon. It wasn't as big as the well known Kloth or Inferno but still huge and could probably just gobble me down as I might do with a piece of jerky. It was walking toward the mountains in front of me to my left. It had two very large sacks Flung over its back. One looked to have quite a few dear carcasses in it, which the dragon was obviously considering, making its dinner. The other sack looked to have a multitude of fruits, vegetables and greens of all sorts. This dragon may have dabbled in cooking, seeing that humans seem to like that activity all the time.

But something was strange. It was the creature, humming that tune. It was quite a jolly tune for a creature famed for its cruelty to humans.

Never the less, I at least thought I would try and protect myself even though I realized there was very little hope of me doing so. I reached for my sword and made a concerted effort to try and pull it as silently as I could. But luck was not on my side. It made the usual singing bell sound that all swords make when pulled. Of course the dragons movable ear immediately swiveled at the sound followed by its huge toothy head. It pointed its snout right at me and let out a bit of a surprised comment.

"Oh its a human!"

With the last of my energy I did my best to lift up my sword and pointed it at the tip of his snout.

Then he did something that I did not expect. He backed off and put his claws in the air and commented out frantically.

"Woe! Woe! Don't worry human. I am not going to hurt you. I am not going to kill you. I am not going to eat you. Okay?"

Startled at this, I blurted out exhaustedly "But, your a red dragon."

Then the dragon commented, "Yes I am. And I don't blame you for being defensive. My kind have not treated humans very well. But trust me, I have had some experiences in my past, that made me change my attitude about humans."

While he was going on, I realized that I might not wind up as a dragon snack. In exhaustion I released my grip on the sword and it fell to the grass to my side. The dragon saw this and commented. "Woe! Human. You don't look like your well." His head then started darting back and forth nervously as if he was trying to decide what to do. He then commented. "Hey, let me borrow your canteen for a minute. I promise I will bring it right back."

With that he deftly used his claw to gently lift the canteen strap off the hook on my backpack. He then turned and with a huge flap of his powerful wings he headed straight for a little dot on the side of the mountain, which was obviously the entrance to his lair. Several minutes past, then I saw him flying right back to me. He had my canteen in one claw and two bags in the other claw. The bags looked tiny in his claw, but for a human like me, they were quite large. The large sacks that he had over his back were gone. He obviously took the time to store his meal ingredients.

He walked up to me and commented, "Here human. I filled your canteen from a water spring in my cave. These bags have some provisions. This one has some venison jerky that I season, smoke and dry myself. This other bag has some venison marrow pemican. There is lots of fruit in it. Its sweet and will give you some of your energy back."

I drank some of the water which was quite crystal clear and did not taste nasty in anyway. I sampled some of the jerky and pemican cake, both of which were quite delicious. And I felt my energy quickly returning. I then commented "I don't know how to thank you dragon. I most likely would have died right here from exhaustion."

He smiled down at me. I didn't even have an idea that a red dragons snout could even manage a warm happy smile. He commented "That's no problem human. I'm happy to help. One reason I made my lair here is to help individuals going along this road. Not taking the switchbacks into account is a common mistake. If I hadn't made my lair at the half way point, there would be quite a lot of deaths."

I immediately screamed "Half way! I'll never make it!"

He then responded with the smile still on his snout, "Oh you will, the rest of the way is far flatter. There are no more mountains to cross."

But then his expression evened off somewhat. He started pointing his snout up into the air and sniffing around. He then commented "On the other hand, you might wish to join me in my lair for the night. I smell a strong rain storm coming this way. The nights are still getting pretty cold around here, so you probably would wind up cold and soaked."

I winced at the idea. I commented "Sleeping on rocks in a cold cave doesn't seem much better."

To which the dragon replied. "Don't worry. I've excavated out many sleeping quarters for smaller creatures like you, and furnished them with soft beds and other furnishings. The entire cave is kept at a comfortable warmth by a hot spring." He had that warm smile on his snout again.

But then is expression changed to a bit stoic again and he said "Although I should let you know I do have a rule that might put you off staying in my lair. But it really isn't that bad. While your inside the living area of my lair, you will remain naked at all times. The only exception is shoes, since humans need protection for their feet. Don't worry though, I'm 350 years old and basically seen everything so no one is going to be making fun of you. You'll find this is fairly common among chromatic dragons like myself and even the metallic dragons feel the same way, but they usually do not enforce it."

At first I was shocked at this, but then I remembered a dragon by the name Claugiyliamatar who is famous for making her followers go naked. I then commented "Oh so Claugiyliamatar's thing isn't unique to her. She just lets everyone think that way".

The dragon then winced and commented urgently "Oh please keep that to yourself. If she learned that I told someone that, well that would be a pretty bad amount of wrath coming my way."

I smiled and said "Oh don't worry. I wont say a word."

The dragon looked visibly relieved and commented "Thanks for that. By the way my name is Korosuaritoth. You can call me Karl for short if you like."

I responded "And I am Eric the trader. Nice to meet you Karl. I must admit I was a bit shocked by that rule but then thought about it and realized that dress codes are quite common even in human dwellings. So I think I will take you up on your offer. Although I know its going to feel exceedingly weird."

Karl's warm smile returned and commented "I'm glad to hear it Eric. Since you are probably not completely recovered yet, you can ride on my back and I'll walk the distance."

I made an effort to get up and found that the water and food that Karl had brought me had indeed restored a good deal of my strength. I picked up my sword and sheathed it and commented, "No need. The food you brought me has made me feel quite a bit better. I'll take you up on the offer of a ride so we can get there before the storm, but you can fly if you like."

He nodded, showed me his back and commented "Clime up then and hold on tight."

I climbed up his back and immediately noted how soft and supple his scales actually were. I got a good grip around his neck and with one powerful beat of his wings, we were in the air. The wind rushed by me powerfully making my eyes water. The experience was thrilling. But then a worrying thought crossed my mind and I called down to Karl, "Hey wouldn't other red dragons be completely angry at you for treating humans nicely?"

He yelled back above the wind, "You would think so, but I actually have a paper agreement with both Kloth and Inferno. As long as I adhere to some strict rules they have agreed to leave me alone. The top most of which is the naked rule. As long as I make sure that creatures staying with me adhere to being naked, I am in compliance with that rule. And believe me, they are always using scrying orbs to make sure that I do that."

He very deftly landed at the entrance to his lair and let me down off his back. The entrance to his cave was fairly monstrous, but to the left side of it, there was a large fireplace hearth and a cheery welcoming fire going. There were faint glowing runes around the fireplace and I suspected, those kept the fire going eternally.

Then he commented "Oh and don't worry about your stuff. See that smaller cave off to the right of the entrance? Look down in it. You'll see a bunch of large wooded chests. They all have combination locks."

He then walked over to the side of the cave entrance and picked up a small brass bracelet that had some numbers written on a flat plate. He commented "This is the number of the chest and these 3 numbers are its combination. This is so you can store all your stuff securely. As I said you can keep your shoes on. Oh and if there is some sort of magical ring that is magically supporting you, you can keep that on as well. Everything else must get stored. Okay?"

I nodded and took the bracelet. It was chest number five. I walked down to the chest, entered the combination and it popped open with no trouble. I kept on thinking that this could all be an elaborate trap on the part of this red dragon, but he has been so nice to me already and without him, I most likely would have died. And he could have had me as a snack at any time but hasn't. I stripped down completely naked except for my shoes and neatly folded everything and laid it all in the bottom of the chest. I put my backpack, canteen and sword in as well and locked the cover.

Being completely naked felt exceedingly weird and I was beginning to feel a bit cold. I assumed the storm Karl sensed, was getting closer. I walked out of the chest chamber into the presence of Karl, fully expecting to hear at least a chuckle out of him, thanks to my nakedness. But true to his word, he did not treat me all that differently. He commented, "Good. just in time. Better come on in." As I stepped into the cave, the skies really opened up and rain began pouring down at the entrance. Karl was obviously right about the storm.

But just then I noticed a powerful wincing pain in my right knee. I collapsed to a seated position to the side of the cave. I yelled out "My knee. I must have over exerted it on the switchbacks."

Karl commented, almost nonchalantly and not concerned at all. "Hold on just a second. Let me go get something." He went off further into the cave then came right back with a huge dragon size book. The binder had letters I did not recognize and I knew it must have been draconic. He opened the book with this left claw, then mumbled to himself, "Page 132". He flipped threw obviously going to that page. He then said to me "This is a minor heal spell. It is all I can accomplish with my level of magical mastery. Still it should be good enough to significantly help your knee."

He started chanting something that was obviously in draconic and he held his right claw open in the air. As he chanted it began to glow faintly with a amber warm glow. He then touched the tip of his claw to my knee and the amber glow flowed into my knee almost as if it were water. Immediately, my knee felt much better and I was able to stand on it again. I could still feel a slight wince of pain though, but no where near the amount that would keep me from walking. I said "Thanks, that helped a lot."

We continued into the cave and he commented "Welcome to my lair. I do have four other guests at this time. That's why I gave you chest five. All of them are really nice so don't worry. Two of them are Kobolds and two are Dragonborn. One of the Kobolds speaks common human tongue. All of them speak draconic."

I did notice that as I walked in, the air was getting very pleasantly warm on my naked skin.

Karl stopped and turned to me and said, "You know you probably deserve an explanation about the naked rule. Trust me, it is not to humiliate you or single you out or make you the brunt of jokes. Let me ask you, have you ever seen a dragon actually waring clothes? And I don't mean if we are hiding in human form, what we call going human." I just shook my head no. He continued. "We are rich enough where we could hire humanoid tailors to make us huge clothes that also accommodate our wings and tails without much difficulty. But we do not. We dragons consider ourselves to be part of nature, but at its pinnacle. We are the top level predator. And we are highly intelligent and sentient. By the way don't take this as a slight to humans or humanoids. It is not meant that way. We just think it would be highly immoral to coverup such perfection. Now we understand that humans and other humanoids, do occasionally require clothes to fend off hostile environments, like the frozen waists. Also, we understand that you need shoes to protect your feet. What we find a bit offensive, though is your tendency to wear clothes in comfortable environments, such as my cave here. I know you personally and other humanoids, do not intend it as an offence and are frankly just not willing to put in the effort to disrobe. But can you at least see that we dragons and other creatures of nature, could look at this habit as an arrogance, or narcissism? Its sort of like you are saying look at us. We are better than nature."

I commented back "I never thought of that, but yes, I can see how it could be perceived that way."

He continued. "Again, please don't take any personal offence. All dragons think this way. I bet, if you pressed a metallic dragon on the issue, he or she would even eventually admit feeling the same way, even though they do not enforce it in their lairs. Thanks for your understanding."

I said "Out of curiosity, what are the other rules you have with Kloth and Inferno?"

He said "Well, there is what they call the two "Efforts" rules. The first one is that I am not allowed to possess more than one tenth of the amount of treasure that either one of them has. The idea is that they consider that "Not worth the effort." In other words, they wont bother killing me for that. Believe me, other red dragons would love to have even a tenth of what those two possess so its not hard to adhere to that rule. The second "Efforts" rule is that I cant claim more than one tenth of the amount of land they claim for territory for my territory. The next rule is, I can not go around evangelizing to other dragons, on the benefits of befriending humans. And the last rule is, they will leave humans alone that are in my territory, but if any of the same humans wander into either of their territories, then I can not complain if they get eaten. And they really do enjoy making humans, well"

I finished Karl's sentence for him "char broiled and tasty?"

He then said "Ya that's a good way to put it."

I winced at the idea and let out a groan then commented "Ya I definitely not going any further north than Tilverton from now on."

Karl snickered a bit then said "Good choice."

I said "Wouldn't other dragons want to steal your treasure?"

He said "Oh of course but given how powerful Kloth and Inferno are, other dragons and especially red dragons, tend to follow what they say. They don't want to anger those two. I think the reason Kloth and Inferno entered into this deal is they are looking at me as some sort of sheep herder, tending livestock that can be used as food by them later if you get my meaning."

I nodded and said "Yup. And I am definitely avoiding their territories."

He continued walking into the lair then commented, almost like a tour guide "Over to your right are halls that lead down to the bedding quarters."

When I looked down, I realized Karl wasn't kidding. The halls to the bedding quarters were very nicely finished with wood wainscoting and painting and looked like a fairly elegant town Inn. I noticed all the halls were lined with quite a number of oil lamps that also had those faintly glowing runes, keeping all the halls well lit.

I then looked up and noticed his other four guests walking out of the next side passage. Even though Kobolds and Dragonborn were known for wearing clothes, and armor for that matter, all four of these individuals were just as naked as me. Karl definitely keeps to that rule. One of the kobalds looks at me and comments "Oh are you a new guest of Karl?"

I nod back and say "Yes he helped me from exhaustion."

The Kobald smiled back and commented "Oh ya, don't worry. A lot of individuals make the mistake of not accounting for the switchbacks through the mountains. Happens all the time."

He shook my hand and as he did he spoke something in draconic to the other three individuals. They immediately nodded understanding and shook my hand as well, making some comment in draconic. The one Kobald commented "They are saying welcome."

I smiled and gave them a nod back.

Then Karl spoke up, obviously talking to me as he spoke human common, the Kobald translating to the others. "I know you still feel weird about being naked. Doing something familiar usually can help that feeling. How would you like a nice traditional afternoon tea with Earl Grey and cucumber sandwiches?"

He led us all on to what struck me as a traditional human stile kitchen, but then I noticed everything was massive in size. Obviously it was all dragon size.

Looking a bit shocked I blurted out "How the heck am I going to sit at that table?"

But then I saw the other four reptilian guests going around a set of stares to the left of the table up to a platform that allowed them to sit at the table properly.

Looking a bit sheepish, I commented, "Oh right."

Karl giggled a bit.

I got to the top with the other guests and noticed the platform was just high enough to bring the chairs up to waste height with the table. The platform extended for a small distance under the table so that no one could fall. The chairs where a bit strange in that they had this large O ring of metal holding up a back rest. For a moment I wondered about this until I noticed my fellow guest, using it for a convenient gap for there tails and I thought to myself "Karl thought of everything."

Karl started making introductions. "This Kobald here is Ikithek. He is the one who can speak human common tongue. The other Kobald is Klekseek. The first Dragonborns name is Garagon and the next is Hooridon." Each one bowed in turn to me. They may not have recognized human common tongue, but they did recognize an introduction.

Karl then said "OK here are humanoid size creature cucumber sandwiches, buttered scones, venison jerky, and fruit and venison marrow pemican." as he set down circular metal racks in front of all of us, holding generous proportions of all of these snacks. He continued "And of course, humanoid size cups." Setting those down in front of us as well. He then set a dragon size cup and dragon size servings down, on his side of the table.

He continued "And now to get the tea going." Picking up a huge water kettle from the dragon size fire box stove. But then he got a sheepish look on his face and he commented, "Oops. I let the fire go out on the stove. The water is cold. Um, excuse me a minute. He then went down a side passage that led from this, his kitchen. A moment passed and he came back with a huge sling of firewood. He opened the door to the stove firebox and started loading it. He then turned to us and said something in what I assumed to be draconic. Ikithek translated and said "He said, Don't freak out."

Karl drew back a huge breath, then spat a cone of fire into the stove firebox. I could only marvel at the accuracy at which he could do that. The wood he had loaded, flared to life and he closed the door.

I giggled a bit and commented "Oh that can be used as a tool as well as a weapon."

The other guests giggled as Ikithek translated.

Karl still looked a bit sheepish, although still with a smile on his snout, and commented "Ya, I guess so."

It took a few minutes for the water to boil and it was all I could do to keep my hands off the treats in front of me. I could tell the other guests were feeling the same.

I also noticed that on the other side of the corridor that led here, there was an area with humanoid size picnic tables and what looked to be some sort of stage.

Finally the steam started to make the kettle whistle. Karl put some Earl Grey leaves in a steeping pot then added the hot water. He then flipped over a small sand timer. Seeing that he is steeping Earl Grey, I assume that timer is a 3 minute one.

When the sand ran out, he filled our normal size cups and his dragon size one. He also put cups of honey on the table, once again, small for the guests and me and big for him.

I added just a little honey to my tea and took a sip. It was smooth and relaxing and not overly steeped at all, and I sighed at how comforting it was.

As I and the guests ate and drank, I started to realize that Karl was correct in that I started to feel a bit more normal even though I was still naked.

Then Garagon said something in draconic to Karl. Ikithek translated to me. "He is asking Karl how he got to be such an unusual friendly red dragon. He probably started wondering since your here and you didn't wind up becoming a red dragon meal instantaneously."

Karl started telling them the story and Ikithek translated for me "First of all, don't shed a tear for the typical, runt getting kicked out, story. That was me. I was. But the runts of a dragon hatching almost always do perfectly fine on their own. And I started out no different. I was the typical red dragon hatchling. I was vain, greedy, arrogant and narcissistic. It did not take me very long at all to find my own lair and immediately start killing and eating passers by and taking any treasure they had. Only took a few years and I already had started getting a reputation. Fortunately, I chose a lair in a spot where the humans in the surrounding villages where not all that smart. They kept sending adventurers to try and slay me, but never sent any magic users which was a big mistake. All that ever did was provide a supply of humans I could make extra crispy, so I could dine on them. And of course I added any treasure they had to my own. This also, is how I was able to pickup on human common tongue. Then one day another group showed up, but I noticed that one of them was hanging back and peaking out from behind a rock. I thought, maybe they finally wised up and brought a magic user, so I kept an eye on him through the fight. He never cast anything and I easily dispatched his friends within seconds. He was stunned at how fast I killed them all, but then managed to get his wits and turned to run. I let out a mighty roar then I bellowed at him, don't bother, I can easily catch you. He stopped, and turned to look at me again. He was shaking in fear and probably wetting his pants. I noticed he had on the robes of a cleric and I immediately knew this party brought him along to heal any injuries. Unfortunately they poorly underestimated me. I told him, Since you are a cleric, I am going to let you go, but I demand you let those villagers know that they are vastly underestimating me and its making me angry. He nodded and began to walk away, but just then my attention was drawn to a loud crack just above me. My roar had loosened a huge stone from the ceiling. It was big enough to crush me and I was just a moment away from a horrible death. But then I felt a hard shot against my side and I was immediately flung back against the wall ten feet away. The massive bolder crashed to the floor just in front of me. I crawled up its side and peeked over. There was the cleric holding up his hands as if he had cast a spell. He must have used force push to push me out of the way. He had obviously saved my life. I looked at him questioningly and commented, Why? Why would you save me. He commented back to me a bit sheepishly, Well, my god demands that I follow a certain rule. Its called the golden rule. I barked back at him, Oh please, it probably has nothing to do with gold and I have no time for a religious sentimentality. But, out of curiosity what is it? He said, It states that you should do on to others as you would have them do on to you. I then growled back, Yup, I figured it would be something that inane. Now go back to your village and do as I told you. He immediately ran away. I shrugged off what he told me and went about breaking up the bolder so that it would be easy to get in and out of my lair again. But for some reason, those words just kept on repeating in my brain like a tick that would not go away. Do on to others as you would have them do on to you. I started humming catchy tunes to try and wipe those words from my mind, but they would always come back torturing me. Several years passed and I started getting use to those words running through my brain now and again. Still I paid them little heed. I had developed a favorite tactic to increase my treasure. There was a road outside my lair that was a favorite haunt of thieves, who would set up ambushes by putting some archers up in tree branches. I would wait for the thieves to strike and then immediately ambush them as well, killing them, their victims and making meals of them all, and of course taking all their treasure. One day I was watching a band of thieves setup an ambush like this. I was circling way up in the sky and they didn't notice me. A group of humans came by with a wagon. As soon as they attacked I attacked the lot of them as well. I killed and swallowed a couple of the thieves in seconds then turned to the thieves victims, intending to do the same as well, to them. But then I pulled up and gasped. The first human I saw was the very same cleric I had met years back. I bellowed, What are you doing here. But before he could answer, his eyes grew wide and he hit me with a force push again, and to my surprise an arrow flew by my head. I turned to see that one of the thieves was still alive up in a tree. I quickly exhaled a cone of fire and burnt him and the tree to a crisp. I then turned back to the cleric, but then immediately noticed another thief taking aim at him. I once again used my fire to char him to a crisp. I then looked down at the cleric again, thinking at last I can kill them and take their treasure. But then the words started up in my head again. This time they were not whispering. They were screaming in my head. I gripped my head and flailed around. The humans, including the cleric took it as a sign that they should go and they did. It just kept wrenching at my mind. Do on to others as you would have them do on to you. Do on to others as you would have them do on to you. Then something happened that I never thought would happen. I shed a tear. The full meaning of that annoying rule hit me like a ton of bricks. I had saved the clerics life and he had saved mine, twice. From that point on, I vowed to help humans and other humanoids, instead of eating them. That was the last time I ever saw that cleric and I never did learn his name. And that is what led me to create this half way point to help travelers in need. It had fully dawned on me, that this was no mere inane religious rule. It was more of a truism."

Karl then said in common tongue, "Oh I didn't tell you. These 4 reptilian guests are a traveling band of minstrels. They call themselves the Tilverton four."

Then Ikithek then got a smile on his face and giggled a bit and commented. "Oh well that changes. Its mainly where we're staying at the time. Hey, we could replay a couple of the tunes we played you earlier."

I then blurted out "Let me guess. Across the Western Sea, was one of them."

Ikithek then got a questioning look on his face and said "How did you know that."

I then replied "Karl was humming it when he found me."

Ikithek then replied "Ah I see." snickering a bit.

Karl said "Hold on, if your going to do that, we all need a good tankard of mead." He went back to his back room then came back with five humanoid size tankards and one big one for himself. The four minstrels took their tankards up on stage and got ready to play and Ikithek cleared his throat a couple times to sing.

The stage area was just a decorated as the rest of Karl's lair that I have seen so far. There were pictures all over the place and one very large and realistic mounted bronze dragon head.

The group was about to start singing, but then Karl yelled out "Hold on. Hold on. Don't start yet."

He walked over to the bronze dragon head and in a very annoyed, mechanical, one syllable, manor, he commented "I don't own a mounted bronze dragon head!"

To my astonishment, the bronze dragon head smiled very sheepishly.

Karl then continued "Felgolos, what are you doing here? There is nothing for you to spy on here."

The head then commented back "Oh uh, well I heard you usually have some really good minstrel band playing here and I was hoping I could listen."

Karl then palmed his forehead looking a bit annoyed and comment "Okay. Okay. Fine. But please keep your body on the other side of the Frame Teleport spell."

Karl then noticed me looking up very questioningly at the entire absurd exchange. He craned his long neck down and whispered into my ear, "Felgolos has a bad reputation for being very clumsy and accident prone, and I would rather he not break anything here."

I responded, "Ah I see."

Ikithek said "Just so you know, these three might know the sound of the words, but they obviously don't know what they are singing."

The Tilverton four picked up some instruments and started playing some music.

All the songs they played were all old catchy folk tunes:

The Jolly Roving Tar

Drunken Sailor

Rambling Boys of Pleasure

As they played I noticed that Karl was off to the side, sitting on his tail and haunches. He reached over to a shelf where he picked up a huge dragon size churchwarden pipe and some pipe weed from a storage jar filling the pipe. With a very controlled, small cone of fire from the tip of his snout, he lit it. It was very nonchalant and as a "matter of fact" that he did this. And again I could only marvel at the control he has over his fire breath. As he smoked, his head would bob to the music, thoroughly enjoying it. I noticed that, now that he was discovered, Felgolos would bob his head to the music as well.

When they got to "Across the Western Sea" Karl and I started singing with Ikithek.

As I was walkin' down the street

Across the Western Ocean

A fair young lassie I did meet

Across the Western Sea

She was a beauty, bow to stern

Across the Western Ocean

And for her treasures I did yearn

Across the Western Sea

When we reach the other shore

Across the Western Ocean

We'll drink like hell, we'll rant and roar

Across the Western Sea

She asked me if I'd stand a treat

Across the Western Ocean

"I will," says I "for one so sweet"

Across the Western Sea

Up to her quarters we did go

Across the Western Ocean

I kissed her from her head to toe

Across the Western Sea

When we reach the other shore

Across the Western Ocean

We'll drink like hell, we'll rant and roar

Across the Western Sea

We took no rest, we forged ahead

Across the Western Ocean

We rocked and rolled around the bed

Across the Western Sea

Then heavy footsteps on the stairs

Across the Western Ocean

"Oh dear!" says she "My husband's there!"

Across the Western Sea

When we reach the other shore

Across the Western Ocean

We'll drink like hell, we'll rant and roar

Across the Western Sea

I leapt from bed, put on my clothes

Across the Western Ocean

His fist, it found my poor old nose

Across the Western Sea

He shook me like a ragged doll

Across the Western Ocean

I was kicked about like an old football

Across the Western Sea

When we reach the other shore

Across the Western Ocean

We'll drink like hell, we'll rant and roar

Across the Western Sea

He'd murder me, I knew right well

Across the Western Ocean

So down the stairs I flew like hell

Across the Western Sea

Come sailor boys, where'er you be

Across the Western Ocean

I hope you's all take mind of me

Across the Western Sea

When we reach the other shore

Across the Western Ocean

We'll drink like hell, we'll rant and roar

Across the Western Sea

When we reach the other shore

Across the Western Ocean

We'll drink like hell, we'll rant and roar

Across the Western Sea

YA HA HA HA!

After several more foot tapping songs and strong sweet honey mead, we all began to yawn. We all needed to head to bed.

Felgolos then commented "Hey guys, looks like your about done. I really enjoyed your music. Your really good. I have to go. I cant keep the Frame Teleport spell open much longer." He then slipped his head back out of the portal and the frame reverted to what it was before, which was just the frame of a picture.

Karl snickered a bit and commented "I don't know about that dragon."

Ikithek then got a mischievous grin on his face and commented "Hope our performance wasn't" then he paused for dramatic effect.

"A bust."

Karl groaned.

Ikithek then continued "Looks like we are getting"

"A head."

Karl groaned again, and commented "There should be a law against puns like that."

Ikithek snickered.

Karl headed down a side tunnel to what I assumed to be a treasure room. One thing I did know about dragons was the secondary use they got from treasure. It served as a bed that would not ignite if they accidentally let sparks out of their nostrils.

The Tilverton four headed down to the same group of bedrooms from the hall they came out from earlier. I went down the next hall and opened the first door, immediately finding it equipped with a nice soft bed just like Karl had said. There was a oil lamp with those same runes on it. Thankfully, it could be adjusted up and down with a little wheel so it could be set low for sleeping. There was a desk, bookshelf with books and a plush chair. This chair had a wide circle hole again, where tails could go. Karl really wanted to make sure that tailed species felt welcome.

Thanks to the mead it didn't take me long at all to fall asleep.

I had a very restful sleep. The next thing I hear is Karl bellowing out "Just letting you all know dawn has come!"

I get up and just for a moment I look around to see if I could spy a chest of drawers where my clothes would be but then I hit myself in the head and muttered "Oh ya right".

I left the room and went up to the kitchen area again, but Karl wasn't there. The four minstrels met me then we heard Karl's voice come from a large passage to the right of the kitchen, that seemed to spiral down to the left. He said "Hey if any of you need a bath follow my voice." Then it sounded like he repeated the same thing in draconic. We followed the path which made a couple of long looping spirals to the left, those oil lamps lighting the way. I noticed the air was getting warmer and more humid. It then opened up to this massive room with a steaming pool of water in it. There were very large flat areas, around the pool where a dragon of Karl's size could easily walk. Karl was lounging at the far end of the pool. It was obviously much deeper there. When he saw all five of us walk in, he commented something in draconic and Ikithek told me he said, "Don't worry, the water is hot but not scalding."

We all started to wade in a bit. The temperature was pleasantly hot like bath water and it was constantly moving. Over where Karl was lounging, the water slowly flowed off a precipice into an abyss. The water was hot enough where all of us had to stop and start to get used to it. Once we did the moving water was very relaxing and we all slumped up at the side of the shallow side of the pool. I sighed "Ah. Just what I needed."

Ikithek said "Ya. This feels nice."

Karl mentioned "Besides being a half way point on the road, this pool is another reason I made this cave my lair. Its so comforting to have a bath now and again."

I could feel the water carrying away several days worth of grime and sweat. I dunked my head in for a moment and worked my fingers through my hair to wash it as well.

Karl had a warm smile on his face, almost as if he were a human watching small birds in a bird bath and somehow considered us to be "Cute."

After a while of lounging in the luxurious warm water, Karl made a comment in draconic. Ikithek translated to me, "He is saying he thinks its time to go make some breakfast. Would you guys like a traditional bangers and mash?"

Thinking that definitely sounded tasty I nodded.

He walked around us and we followed him back up to his kitchen area. We could tell that this time he did not forget to get the stove fired up. Ikithek, his companions and I made our way up to the platform again.

Karl pulled down a frying pan and put it on the stove in the middle where its hottest. He put a pot down on the side where it wouldnt be quite as hot. He then went back in that side room and returned with the ingredients he needed.

I then asked "You know I was curious about that room down there."

Karl said "Oh you don't want to go down there. I use it to sore all my food and cooking ingredients including where I have slaughtered deer carcasses."

I nodded and said "OK. But that wouldn't bother me that much. I have seen and done my share of cleaning deer carcasses myself."

Karl put a bunch of sausages in the heating pan. Many were normal size but two were gigantic obviously for him. I noticed the pot began to steam a bit. It obviously already had a good amount of mashed potatoes.

When he was done, he served out some plates and cups again. He put some of the sausages on our plates. The smell they let off made it obvious he was using the same venison. He added a good helping of mashed potatoes and some other vegetables that he grilled. He then went to fetch the same tea steeping kettle from before, and as he did he commented in draconic, with Ikithek translating "This is actually a good breakfast stile tea."

I the Tilverton four, and Karl started digging into our meal. Again, I was actually taken a back, by how good a cook Karl is. I thought to myself, "Well he is an adult dragon, 350 years old. He has had plenty of time to practice."

I commented "This is very tasty indeed. Thank you Karl."

He said "Thanks. Cooking is quite fun. I can see why humans like doing it."

Once we all finished our enjoyable meal, Ikithek commented in human common tongue, obviously so I could understand as well, "Hey we need to get going. We have a show we are scheduled to do in Suzail. Bye Karl. It was fun." Karl nodded still smiling and handed them a small bag. I assumed it probably had gold pieces in it. They went down into the chest area and started to get their things.

I said to Karl "I must agree, I had a great time as well. But I am afraid I must be going as well. I had promised to bring a big collection of magical items to a man by the name of William in Arabel, and he is going to pay me 2700 gold pieces. And I really do need that money. And I am afraid I am now a bit late."

Karl smiled warmly at me as if he knew that I could have easily asked him for a loan of that amount but had pride enough to just do my job. He commented. "Yes I had fun as well. If you like, and you get some time to have a break or vacation, feel free to come back around. Although, since it would not be a situation where I am helping you I would appreciate just a small donation of gold pieces, just so I can pay for maintenance and the occasional minstrel band."

I nodded agreeing and commented "Yup, not a problem, and that sounds like fun." Although I knew that money was an issue. However, I didn't want to disappoint Karl.

I got my things and started down the road to Arabel. I walked a couple of miles and to my surprise, I saw William walking in the other direction. He did not look happy and was grumbling to himself.

Then he saw me and screamed "Where have you been?"

I said "The Stormhorn switchbacks were much more than I thought they would be."

He growled at me "No excuses. Do you have my merchandise?"

I handed him the bag of magical items. He opened it up and his anger visibly dissipated a bit. He then turned and started walking off.

I then screamed at him "Where's my money. You owe me 2700 gold pieces."

He didn't stop and screamed back "Traders who are late, don't get paid."

I screamed "I need that money."

He wheeled around, looking angry again and growled through clenched teeth, "I told you no."

He didn't even notice a rather large thump behind him.

Then he heard a low voice saying "I think you owe him some money." in a low even tone, rather reminiscent of an angry gang leader.

William, hearing this, growled out loudly, "What business is it of

"

He did not get to finish. When he wheeled around, he saw Karl behind him, grinning down at him. This time it wasn't a warm smile. It was that of the same aforementioned gang leader with evil intentions. And it was showing the rows of his dagger sharp teeth. Williams lower jaw fell open and his face drained of all color, going completely white. He just stood there for a moment, then bit his lower lip, wheeled around and handed me a bag. I looked inside and could immediately tell that all 2700 gold pieces where in there.

Karl then said "Good. I think this is the point you should be running now." Again really softly with obviously malicious intent.

William immediately took off toward Arabel.

I walked up to Karl and looked at him and he looked at me. For a moment we just stood there. Then almost perfectly in time, we both let out a snerk, then started laughing out hard. We literally fell to the ground and rolled around as we laughed ourselves silly. I blurted out "The look on his face was priceless!"

Karl said "Ya, by Tiamat, I would give a fortune to see that again."

I then sat up and let out a sigh and said "Unfortunately, even this amount of gold pieces is not going to be enough. Its my house. I owe a lot in taxes and my house needs a lot of work done. I don't think I am going to be able to keep it.

Karl had gotten up and was listening. He went to say something but then looked like he was deep in thought. He asked "Don't you have any relatives or friends that can help you out?"

I said "No. I have never married since I never found the right woman. And all my close relatives have passed away. I do have some very distant relatives. It just would not be right to ask them."

Karl look as if he was deep in thought again.

Then he said, "Have you ever heard of a Sarynmunthrek."

I knew that last word had to be in draconic and I had no idea what it meant.

He said "Roughly translated it means. Um." It looked like he was having a tough time, finding something that matched. He continued "As best as I can match it means Dragons Favorite. Its kind of a tradition among dragons, that they will keep around a human who they like. Even the most vicious of us, sometimes do this. It usually means the dragon both likes a human and also sees it is valuable to keep the human around. So its not really just the Favorite. Its kind of a little deeper than that. Since you are a trader by profession, you could do something for me. I am a lover of old folk tunes and you could go around to local villages negotiating a good price with local folk tune groups. If you did that for me, I would like you to be immediately truthful to them about who and what I am. Tell them I don't mind paying a good fee. You could be my favorite. You could then sell your house and I would give you free room and board. Of course you would still need to adhere to the naked rule. Also, you could help me out with those humanoid size sleeping quarters. Obviously I am just too big to get down there and clean them. I usually pay some human to do it for me. I could possibly clean them by going human, but my level of magical mastery is not that high and it is tough for me to maintain a human form for very long."

I looked a bit shocked at the suggestion. I thought about it for a moment and then said "Um. Maybe. I would like to think about that some more. Its a big step."

Karl nodded and said "Yes it is and I understand."

I walked away toward Arabel to take care of other business I had there.

Three months to the day I found myself back at the entrance to Karl's lair. I had sold my house and much of my possessions. All that remained was in a backpack that I was carrying. I had already grabbed an available brass bracelet from the wall, opened its chest and put my belongings in it. I was standing at the entrance naked. I called out "Karl I am here."

He came to the entrance.

Then I said "I'll be your favorite."