FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

On a Saturday morning, I woke up early for some reason. At around 8 AM. Which is kind of strange, considering it was a Saturday. Normally I would sleep in. Then again, it was very warm outside already and felt the warm sun on my face. But that wasn't the reason why I woke up so early. I woke up because I felt my face was being licked. When I opened my eyes, I saw Ceylan had her eyes still closed while she held on to me. It was actually kind of cute to see her like that, as if she was just a little cub or something. After a while, I noticed that she opened her eyes and looked baffled at me while her tongue was sticking out. I thought it was so cute to see... It's just her way of saying "I love you"... 'Hehe...'

'I always had a weak spot for fluffy stuff, Nic...'

'Hmmm-mm... You're not as ferocious as you always claim to be...'

It stayed silent as we were lying on our bed for a long time. Every now and then, we let out big yawns... Just feeling the warm sun on our faces while we closed our eyes... But it wasn't enough to make me fall asleep. But I loved days like these. Just to lie in bed and drifting away. But at some moment, I realized we were wasting our day. So I slowly opened my eyes and looked at the clock. 10:37 AM... Then I closed my eyes and felt myself drifting away again... "Just one hour... I swear..." 'What are we gonna do today...?'

'Mmwuh...?'

'It's a lovely day... It would be a waste if we don't go outside...'

'Hmm-mmmmm...'

'You awake yet...?'

'Mmmwhuh...'

'I'm going to take a shower...'

'M'kay...'

A couple of moments later, I felt how she got out of bed. And when I opened my eyes, I saw her naked, like she always was whenever she was sleeping with me. I had no idea what caused it. But I felt so many tingles in my stomach when I saw her walking out the door that morning, staring at every inch of her gorgeous body. After a while, I heard the shower was turned on. For a while, I was thinking in bed, hesitating on what to do. "Now's the right moment, come on, go..." Soooo... I got up and went to the bathroom. She never locked the door for some reason. She left the door wide open, as if she was trying to invite me in. The shower curtain was wide open when I got in. And I was facing her back... Ceylan was looking up while she had her eyes closed as the water was running over her face. I was watching her and at some point, she noticed I was watching her... She turned her head and smiled, and then looked away again... Maybe that was the hint I was hoping for... So I took off my nightie... Took off my bra... And got out of my panties... I stepped in the bathtub, and hugged her from behind for a while, hoping she would react. And at some point, she turned around, and sat at the bottom of the bathtub. So I did the same, while I sat between her legs, with my back facing her, feeling her soft fluffy tail between my legs, still hoping she would do it... "Touch me... Please..." She clenched her arms around my stomach, and gently started to lick the back of my head. I never had the guts to ask her to do it... She always did without asking... But after a while, she didn't... Well, you know... So I scraped all the guts I had and tried to bring it up. It wasn't gonna be easy. And I knew I just had to be blunt and tell her. So the moment I uttered it out of my mouth, I felt really nervous.

'W-Would you go down on me...?'

'Now...?'

'Yes...?'

'Heh...'

'You won't do it...'

'No, dushi...'

It stayed silent for a while as she kept on licking the back of my neck... I didn't want her to lick my neck... I wanted her to lick something else... Or touching for all that matters... I love it when she does that... 'W-Would you touch me...?'

'I uh...'

'P-Please...?'

'Nikki...'

'Yes...?'

'I want to but...'

'But...?'

'I wish I knew...'

'Heh...'

I could hear it in her voice. She was lying. She did know the answer to that question. Maybe she didn't want to answer me because she would hurt my feelings if she did. But I wanted to know why she wasn't doing it... She would kiss me and all that but... We don't have sex anymore... It's not like her to be insecure about something. But even now when things were finally getting better, she was still unsure and insecure about us... And about our sex life... Heh... Well... My sex life was great but... Did she experience the same? Did she have a great sex life as well with me...? Knowing how insecure I am about my capabilities of pleasing her, she never asked me to please her. I never had the guts to do it, actually. I was always on the receiving end, and I can tell you that I've been enjoying it but did she? Could she enjoy pleasuring me? Would she...? I thought that she waited for the right moment. A moment where I would come out of my isolation... And I realized that if I wanted my sex life back, that I was the one who had to take the initiative to show her that I was ready for it. She was insecure about taking the initiative because I think it must've felt really awkward if we were doing it again after a long time... And then everything would start all over again... So I had to show her that I was ready for it. But I didn't realize it that morning. I was too focused on what I wanted, and not what she wanted... 'We've got plenty of time. No need to rush things, dushi...'

'Yeah...'

'You sound disappointed...'

'Heh...'

'Trust me when I say that good things come to those who wait, Nikki...'

It stayed silent again for a while as she was licking the back of my head again. I love that feeling. Some people think it's disgusting but they obviously never felt it... I loved it whenever she was licking me... In any way imaginable... 'How'd you get the scar on the back of you're head...?'

'Hm? Oh, eh... I-I eh...'

'Hm...?'

'I-I fell down the stairs when I was a kid... A-And bumped my head...'

'Must have hurt...'

'Y-Yeah...'

Now I was the one lying to her. I didn't fell down the stairs. It happened when dad couldn't find the remote...

Ceylan kept licking the back of my head and neck while the hot water was running over our faces. At some point, she turned off the shower. But we didn't got out. We cuddled each other in the empty bathtub for a long time while we didn't say anything. And after a while, I was feeling cold and started shivering. The moment she noticed I was shivering, she held me even tighter and whispered of how much she loved me and what I meant to her. Then all of a sudden, I turned my head and kissed her... Then looked away and stared into blank space for a while... And all of a sudden, I started to cry for no apparent reason... Then she held me even tighter, whispering in my ear that everything would be alright...

Looking back now, it seems kinda strange that I couldn't have touched her the way I wanted to. I wanted to, but I just couldn't. And I think she couldn't do it either. Maybe it's because we haven't had sex in a long time, and that it might've felt awkward if we did, which would probably make things worse. Nonetheless, that wasn't on my mind that morning. All I wanted was to have things back the way they were. Being able to be intimate with her without feeling embarrassed about it. She never forced it on me. I just did what I always wanted to do. To satisfy my curiosity... And I just gave in to that. Maybe that was my problem. Being weak of character and being naive about things. She wasn't the one manipulating me... Maybe I was just manipulating myself again... I just simply gave in without second thought. I mean, why would I think twice about the things I like...? To have my doubts about the girl I love...? It didn't seem to have a reason, but now I know. It's just to avoid this. It's just another endless cycle of loops where there seems to be no end.

But even though Ceylan and I weren't being intimate anymore in the way I wanted to didn't mean we couldn't enjoy the simple things. For a couple of months, it felt as if we didn't have a relationship. It felt as if we were just close friends. Of course, whenever we were spending the night together, we cuddled and kissed but apart from that, nothing else happened. But maybe it was for the best. I could see that Ceylan became less insecure over the months, and even though I longed for her passion, and even though I could see it in her eyes that she wanted to, we still didn't had sex... I never talk about it and Ceylan used to ask me what I like and what I wanted... But she's not doing that anymore, and I didn't know what caused it... Whenever I tried to bring it up, she tried to explain it and made a big story out of it that didn't really make much sense to me... I just didn't want to push it... But apart from that, everything went great...

'No!! NO!!! Don't do this!! Please don't do this to me!! DON'T!!! DAMN IT!!!'

"_A problem has been detected and Windows has been shut down to prevent damage to your computer.

If this is the first time you've seen this stop error screen, restart your computer. If this screen appears again, follow these steps:

Check for viruses on your computer. Remove any newly installed hard drives or hard drive controllers. Check your hard drive to make sure it is properly configured and terminated. Run chkdsk /F to check for hard drive corruption, and then restart your computer.

Technical information

***STOP: 0x0000007B (0xF898963C, 0xf0000034, 0x00000000 0x00000000)"_ I grabbed the edges of the screen of my laptop and shook it around, as if that would make everything work again. But of course, that didn't work. For the last couple of days, my laptop gave these blue screens and well... Everything just shuts down, losing all of my work... _ _

'That's the first time I ever heard you made a swear...'

I looked up and noticed Ceylan was standing there in her nightie, smiling innocently. She sits down next to me, and stared at my face for a while as she kept on having that smile... But I turned my head away and stared at the screen again, waiting for it to come back... 'No seriously, I never heard you swear before...'

'I'm sorry, but... I gotta hand in this paper next Tuesday and it keeps on crashing! I'm so sick of this thing!'

Ceylan took a sip from her coffee and stared at the screen as well... ' Ah... I told you to make regular backups of you're documents... That's what those flash disks are for...' I just sighed... It's easy for her to tell...

'How old is you're laptop?'

'Uh... I think its two years old by now...'

'So it's out of warranty then...' she said, sipping her coffee again...

'I guess...'

'Hm...'

'What am I supposed to do now...?! I've been working the entire morning on this and didn't even have the chance to make a back-up!'

She pressed and held the power-button of the laptop until it goes off and pressed the power button again. Ceylan opened up the CD-drive to see if there was a CD in it and closed it again when she noticed there was no CD inside. But the laptop didn't even boot... You saw this Windows logo screen with that progress bar, and right at that point, another blue screen appeared... 'Noooooooo...!'

'Hm... "PROCESS_INITIALIZATION_FAILED"

So she pressed the power-button again and waited until the laptop went off again. She turned it back on and this time, Windows booted just fine... 'EEE!! Thank you!!'

'Open up your document.'

So I did, and this auto-recovery feature that Office had, restored my document and it was intact. I still had to make small changes, but I quickly saved it. And then... Just as I was making those changes... Another blue screen appeared... 'Ah! Nooo!! I thought you fixed it!'

'I never said I did, dushi... "NV4_disp.dll..."

So she rebooted the laptop once more... And this time, Windows booted up correctly, shortly followed by another blue screen... 'I hate this... I might as well go buy a new one...'

'No need to buy a new one... "PAGE_NOT_ZERO..."

'Ceylan, rebooting the laptop over and over again isn't gonna work... I can't work like this so I need a new one...'

'No, rebooting won't solve it. I'm just trying to see those error messages.'

'So you know what "STOP Error 0x00000127" means?'

'No, you have to pay attention to little details.'

'Whadda ya mean?'

'These error screens, they randomly appear at random times, right?'

'Yeah...'

'Well, each stop error screen indicates a different problem. First we got "PROCESS_INITIALIZATION_FAILED", then we got "NV4_disp.dll..." and then the "PAGE_NOT_ZERO" error. The first one indicated a possible hard-drive error, the second one indicated that you're graphics card driver is corrupt and the third one indicated you have a memory problem.'

'Uh...'

'You happen to have a screwdriver...?'

'You know how to fix it...?'

'Yeah, this one is easy...'

She turned the laptop off while I searched for screwdrivers... I didn't know which one she needed, so I took a whole bunch with me. She turned the laptop upside down and unscrewed a small lit, and once she managed to open it, I saw two small green... thingies... 'These are SO-DIMM DDR memory modules, specifically designed for laptops. You've got two 512 MB modules, and one of them is busted. Normally, I'd say you're boot record device or you're graphics card is busted, but it's unlikely that all of these things are defective, so I think it's most likely a memory issue.'

'I have no idea what you just said...'

'One of these things are broken which causes you're laptop to act funny.'

'Oh...'

So she removed one of those things and pressed the power-button on the laptop again. Everything seemed to work just fine but a couple of minutes later, another stop error screen appeared. Ceylan switched it off again and removed the other thing and puts the other one back in. Then the laptop was switched on again... And we waited... 'You're laptop might be a bit slower then it used to be, but it should work fine now...'

'You think it's fixed now...?'

'Yeah... Otherwise you would've had a blue screen already. Let's just wait and see what it does.'

So I opened my document and went to different web-pages and stuff but... No blue screen yet... They didn't come back anymore. When I looked back at Ceylan, she had her eyes closed and had this confident smile on her face while she sipped her coffee...

Ever since Ceylan and I got together since the "time-out", we haven't slept together... Well, we slept in the same bed but we didn't... Well, you know... But because of that, didn't mean I often thought about it... Sometimes, while she was next to me in bed, I could look for hours at her... Her scent was just everywhere and so intoxicating... I wanted to but... For some reason, she didn't... We could talk for hours in bed, and whenever I tried to bring it up, she just... I don't know, it felt as if she wasn't herself. Something held her back, but I had no idea what it was...

On a rainy night, I was in my room at my desk, finishing up a sketch I did for my own personal sketchbook. I heard the door got closed and felt Ceylan's paws on my shoulders, firmly massaging them. She rests her chin on my shoulders, and I quickly kissed her cheek... 'You weren't supposed to see this after it got finished...'

'Is that me...?'

'Yeah...'

'My tits aren't that big, dushi...'

'I made the sketch... I can make them as big as I want them to be...'

'Hehehe...'

'You like it...?'

'Yeah... It looks really good...'

'What's wrong...? You sound so glum...'

'Nothing, I'm just really tired...'

'Bad day, huh...?'

'Yeah...'

'Just go to bed then... I'll be there in a sec...'

I was gonna finish the sketch but... I ended up watching how Ceylan was undressing herself... Like I said, I never get tired to see her body... Her gorgeous hourglass figure... Her small breasts... Her firm thighs and her beautiful buttocks... Ceylan always slept naked even if we weren't having sex... I looked at the sketch and thought "Fuck it, I'll finish it tomorrow...' I had something else in mind... 'I'm gonna take a shower...'

'Take you're time, dushi...'

I thought that, well, she might jump up and carry me to the bathroom but nooo... She snugs herself under the blankets until the only thing I saw of her beautiful body was her beautiful head... Hmm... So I deliberately took my underwear off slowly right in front of her nose and bended over... I wiggled my butt... Squeezed my butt-cheeks and tits right in front of her while I looked at her with penetrating eyes... She just stared back at me and smiled... 'You look as if you have to crap needles...'

"Right... No raw juicy meat for you tonight..." And well, I just dropped the act and was about to make my way to the bathroom... 'Nikki... I didn't mean it like that...'

'Yeah, right... Sure you didn't...'

'No, I'm serious...'

'Heh...'

Ceylan took my hand and gently pulled me down as I sat on the bed... She placed her paws on my cheeks and gave me a gentle lick over my nose... I just closed my eyes, waiting for her to continue but... She didn't... And I felt how her hands drifted off to my hands... 'Dushi... You know I love you, right...? And that you mean the world to me...'

'So... What holds you back...?'

'I need to set things straight for myself too, Nic... I got a lot on my mind...'

'Yeah but... You always said to me that I should talk about the things bothering me... I didn't talk to you about it... Because... It was very personal... And... To be honest, it's something you don't have to know in detail... Or... Not after I set everything straight for myself...'

'I understand that, Nic... It's not as if I'm mad at you for that...'

'I-I know but... I just didn't feel comfortable talking to you about it... But... This is about us, you know...? I mean...'

'Does it really mean that much to you...?'

'Yes... I-It does...'

'But what means the most to you...? Me, or... Just the sex...?'

'Both... I can't believe you just asked me that... I think it's obvious... But... I still don't understand why you don't want to talk about it...'

It stayed silent for a long time... Ceylan looked away and took a deep breathe... 'You know, Nic... I once knew a girl I fell in love with a long time ago... Mikaela was her name... And I loved her deeply... I did anything she asked me to do... Absolutely anything... I was crazy about her... I gave myself to her in any way imaginable... But she didn't... All she did was receiving... In any way imaginable... And it was unbearable... It felt as if she used me... Misused my love for her to satisfy her own needs... But I was just too blind to see it... I was young and in love and stupid... It just tore me apart from the inside... Friends said that I was crazy to get used like that but I didn't listen to them... I always asked her if she loved me or not... She always said she did but... I couldn't see it... I couldn't feel that she did... So at some point, the intimacy stopped... And when she asked me why, I couldn't give her an answer... Afraid that she would blame it on me for ruining our relationship... And it only got worse from that point on... So in the end, she blamed everything on me... For not giving enough, while I wasn't given anything in the first place... She never wanted to see me again...'

"Wow..." Ceylan took another deep sigh and wiped a small tear off of her muzzle... I placed my hands on her cheeks and wiped those other tears from her eyes with my thumbs... And then Ceylan looked at me with penetrating eyes... 'Do you understand what I'm telling you, Nic...?'

'Yeah... I do...'

'Okay...'

So that's what's bothering her... An old crush she never really managed to get over with which is why she hesitates to give herself to me like that... I understand, I could imagine how it feels like... So I gave her a firm cuddle and kissed her forehead... 'It's still bothering you, is it...?'

'What is...?'

'Mikaela...'

'Heh...'

'It's ok... Talk about her...'

'No... Just... Go take a shower, okay...?'

'Maybe there's something I can do to make you forget about her... I'll be right back, okay...?'

'Yeah... Sure...'

I kissed her forehead again and I felt so happy, thinking I knew what was bothering her that caused her to hold back... So I took a shower and... Did things to get myself in the mood... Paid extra attention to area's where the sun doesn't shine... Thoughts were rushing by as I was touching myself... Knowing she would stick her tongue between my legs, and would gently lick me until I had enough... I remember the nights when she gave me multiple orgasms... It happened rarely, but whenever it happened... Heh... What she did was spreading my pussy lips... And firmly pressed her tongue against it while she kept fingering me... Sucking on my clit... Played with my tits... She knows exactly what I like... I got so horny just by thinking of it again... And knowing it would happen that night only made it better... So I took the quickest shower I ever took... And once I dried myself off, I went back to my room... The door was closed, and I had no idea what to expect... I thought that she was waiting for me in bed, with her legs spread or... That she was on her knees, begging me to taste my pussy... I hesitated for a moment... But I opened the door to my bedroom... Ceylan wasn't posing for me... She tugged herself under the blankets again with only her head popping out and I saw that she had her eyes closed... So I got in bed next to her as her back was facing me... I moved over to Ceylan and whispered in her ear that I loved her... I felt how my hands drifted off to her butt... Caressing her thighs... And slowly made my way between her legs...'Just go to sleep, Nic...'

'Oh... I'm sorry...'

So I turned the lights off... And it was silent... I could hear her breathe... For hours, I was thinking in bed that night... Wondering what's so special about Mikaela that made her act like that...

I never figured it out... I was starting to get crazy, really... I wanted sex so bad and she just denies it... She wasn't thinking of what I wanted... But I did... The more I thought about it, the more I masturbated... And I thought that sex-toys might provide the answer... But I wasn't so sure of it... So I turned to my best friend in that period... Yes, the internet... I watched a lot of movies on ferociousfelines.com and clicked on the lesbian section... I saw how felines were fucking each other with dildo's and strap-on's and it seemed like a lot of fun... So maybe that was something what Ceylan and I needed... I often sat on the couch, with my earphones in my ears, listening how they were cumming and stuff... Most of them were faked of course, but it didn't sound like that... And it often caused myself to masturbate while I was watching those movies... Either on my couch or... In my bed... Whenever I was in bed, I placed my laptop on my bed while I had those earphones in... Hearing their huffing and puffing and moaning and begging for orgasms and shit... It drove me wild to say the least... So I let all my fingers do all the work... And of course, I always did that whenever I was alone... And then this one time, I watched a clip of a lesbian cat fucking a lesbian husky with a strap-on... The cat dominated the husky and it was so hot to see them...

_"Bark like the hot bitch in heat you are... Ruff... Huuuuurrr ruff! Hihi... Fucking louder, you bitch! Only if you fuck me harder... You're the one in heat... You'll be craving for my cock... Stick it in your mouth and keep sucking it until you treat me with a little more respect... Want me to cock-slap you...? Is that it? Oh wait, it's hard to talk with a dick you're mouth... I didn't tell you to stop, you bitch, keep sucking it. But I want you're cock inside of me so bad... Are you gonna behave? Yes...! Stick it up my ass for all I care... Just fuck me, please... I beg you... Alright... There's a good girl..." _

Well, toys were a lot of fun... It always seemed like that in those movies... And well, the more I watched those movies which involved toys, the more curious I got and the more I thought that this was what Ceylan and I needed. A strap-on... And... A double dildo... So after searching the web for a couple of moments, I found online stores which sold those things... It's not like I'm gonna walk in a store and go like "Uh, yes, I would like the Assinator 5000 with extra lube and the double dildo Extravaganza." It's not like some fastfood take away... So I ordered it online...

On a Saturday afternoon, the TTP mailman brought my package... Weeeell... I was supposed to go to Terry to watch movies but... I called him that afternoon and told him I wasn't feeling so well... Sooo... I took the double ended dildo with me while taking a bath... It just felt so good, you know... The moment I penetrated myself hurt a bit but... It felt good... And well... For the rest of the day, I was naked on my bed, playing with my new toy...

But unfortunately... I never had the chance to show Ceylan what I bought for us... Ever since the last night she slept at my place, she didn't stay for the night anymore... And I just didn't know why... It felt as if she distanced herself from me this time...

One Friday night, as the four of us came back from the movies, we stayed at my place to talk and stuff. Everything was a lot of fun and at some point; it got late and well... Terry and Ceylan were about to go home. I followed Ceylan to the hallway, where she was getting her jacket. She turned around once I held on to her waist, and she looked down on me, while I looked back in her eyes. She looked a bit uneasy to say the least... 'Stay with me tonight, Ceylan...'

'No... It's best that I go home, Nic...'

'Please...?'

'I uh...'

'What does it take for me to have sex with you...?'

'Nic...'

'No... Ceylan, I love you. I really do...'

'I know... But... It's just too soon.'

'N-No, it's not, a-and you know it-'

'Dushi...'

I was getting pretty desperate to say the least. I think you've might have guessed it already. Why didn't she want to? She didn't make a problem out of this in the past. She'd pull my panties down in front of everyone else just to give me what I want. But now... When I looked at her again, she placed her paw on my cheek. 'It'll come. Trust me...' That's all she had to say about it. "It'll come". She gently nudged my chin up, and hesitated for a moment. But then she kissed me anyway. What made her hesitate to kiss me in the first place...? It didn't feel like it used to be. Just an empty kiss... No tingles, no butterflies whatsoever... And just like that, she walked out of the door without looking back...

When Terry was about to leave, I took Terry apart in the hallway and asked if I could talk to him. The way he looked at me, gave away that he knew that something happened. So after we waited for Meagan to go to bed, we flopped down on the couch again. 'I-I'm sorry to hold you up, I know you're tired...'

'That's okay... So what's up...?'

'Things are just... You know... Not what it used to be with Ceylan.'

'Yeah, I know.'

'Wh-What?'

At that point, he pointed to his ears and gave a weak smile.

'These things aren't just for decorations you know.'

'Heh... You were listening?'

'Naah, but I heard something was going on so...'

'Oh...'

'So, talk to me. What's up?'

'Well, at first glance... There's not really a problem. Ceylan and I hang out a lot and we're cuddling, making out and I still really love her but...'

'But?'

'It's just... With everything we do, it just feels empty for me, you know? It used to have a meaning but...'

'But there's nothing anymore.'

'Yeah...'

'Have you ever considered that... You're not the only one being insecure about it?'

'Whadda ya mean...?'

'I talked to Ceylan before. And she wants to but...'

'But she's not doing it for some reason.'

'Yeah. Well, she still wants to. But she's not feeling comfortable with it.'

'She never made an issue out of that in the past.'

'But she does now.'

'Why...?'

'You really don't see it, do you...? She gave you everything you ever wanted. She slept with you whenever you wanted, even when she wasn't in the mood... She sacrificed a lot just to be with you ...'

Then I thought of the night where she came over and told me what happened with her mother...

'You never supported her when she had a fight with her mom. You never asked her if she ever went back and talked to her... You never visited her mom to back Ceylan up. That's what's hurting her. You weren't there for her when she needed you. But despite that, she wanted to be with you, even though it tore her up from the inside.'

'Oh...'

'And then you broke up with her... Everything she ever sacrificed for you was for nothing. It hurt her more then it already did to see you throwing everything away she tried to build up for the two of you as if it was nothing. And she doesn't want to get hurt like that again... Which is why she's so... "cautious" with you right now... '

'I-I didn't know...'

'No of course you didn't... Because you didn't see it...'

Of course... How the hell could I've been so stupid...? Ceylan once told me that I had to place myself first when I still had difficulties... But I was so caught up with my own problems that I forgot hers... She supported me when I needed her... But I didn't... Terry was right... I've been so selfish... 'Look, Nikki... It needs to come from both sides. If one side keeps on giving while the other is receiving, well... It wouldn't last very long. You see what I mean?'

'I never wanted Ceylan to get hurt...'

'I know. But you did, unintentionally.'

'Why didn't she ever tell me this?'

'Because she's afraid and insecure, Nic. Just like you...'

'Heh...'

'Ceylan is difficult to understand and... She's complicated. But... She's very, very sweet and caring once you really get to know her...'

'I know she is...'

'Look... Things can work out between the two of you. I know it can. Despite everything that happened, she still wants to... That has to mean something to you, doesn't it...?'

'Yeah... I-I'm sorry...'

'You're not supposed to say that to me... You need to say that to Ceylan.'

It stayed silent for a while as I was thinking about what he said. And he was right. I had to tell her. How the hell could I've been so stupid...? It frustrates me to realize how selfish I was... I remember the night Ceylan and I were together at Terry's party... And what she told me. And then something came up that might shed a whole new light on things... 'Terry?'

'Yeah?'

'I-I get the feeling that... I'm not the only one who can make her happy. I mean... She broke up with you because she felt that something was missing. And maybe the same thing is happening again... Maybe she still feels that something is missing... I want Ceylan to be happy. I really do... And... If that means I have to share her with you... I wouldn't mind. It's because I just see it in your eyes. You both feel miserable because of it...'

'Heh... Well, let's not rush things, okay? Just one thing at the time, and we'll see from there. I mean, it's difficult as it is already for the three of us...'

'Yeah...'

'Hehe... It'll be alright, Nic...'

'Thanks, Terry...'

'Anytime, babe...'

Terry let out this big yawn... The moment I saw him yawning, I yawned too... It's contagious... 'Do you want me to drive you home...?'

'Naah... I'll walk.'

'You sure...?'

'Yeah...'

'You can also stay for the night if you want...'

'No, it's ok. I need to help my dad tomorrow.'

'Oh ok...'

'See you tomorrow?'

'Yeah...'

'Alright... Goodnight, babe...'

'Goodnight, Terry...'

And so, Terry got out of the door... And I could see him through my window walking away in the darkness with his head down...