Ballbusting haikus
After reading two rounds of Cmanblast3's ballbusting-themed haikus, I tried writing some of my own. Pretty silly, but also pretty fun, if you ask me. Feel free to chime in with your own in the comments
Idea credit to Cmanblast3 and poiu.
Biggest balls in town Just made him a big target Soon enough: *pop* *pop*
Female seeks a male: Must enjoy walks on the beach And constant nutache
"My balls," croaked the frog "My testicles!" squeaked the mouse "My NUTS!!!" howled the wolf
After a long day She couldn't wait to unwind With her man's stress balls
God, he loved her legs. If only they weren't always Smashing up his nuts
Swollen full of cum, Or swollen from all those kicks? Who knows? Probably both
He's a masochist She's a sadist, through and through What a lucky pair
In hindsight, bad plan, Betting you could take those kicks Props, though -- that took balls!
Could they take her weight? Carefully, she stepped on one-- The answer was no :(
She was one hot chick And she was not shy about Scrambing your eggs
Are your balls too small? Join our "Big Balls (BB)" club Growth is guaranteed!
She misunderstood What he meant by "bust a nut" As he soon found out
"Left or right?" she asked He was indecisive, so She just crushed them both
As a squirrel, she had Decades of experience Chomping down on nuts
Friendly little kicks Her leg barely moved at all But he sure felt it
As she sucked his balls She mistook his rising moans For cries of pleasure
His first day as a Self-defense class volunteer Was his last day, too
Former cheerleader She could kick as hard as hell Shake those pom-poms, girl
"She's so hot," he said "I'd give my left nut for her" Not the wisest trade
He enjoyed footpaws She was happy to oblige Smack. Smack. Smack. Smack. Smack.
--
Here's an easy way To get a male's attention: Grab him by the balls
And if you want his UNDIVIDED attention: Pop one of 'em first
--
Her workout was strict: 50 kicks every morning, 50 every night
It kept her legs strong And it left her gym partner Hella swole as well
--
The bull was quite proud Of his big, low-hanging balls... 'Til he sat on them
That was bad enough Then his girlfriend cheerfully Hopped into his lap
--
Her handjob technique was clumsy: each stroke like a soft punch in the nuts
As he got closer And her strokes got more eager, It only got worse
Until finally He had to ask her to stop And left with blue balls
--
The best birth control Is natural, fast, and fun (For the girl, at least)
Spend an hour or three Smashing your man's testicles Until they shoot blanks
Once he's sterilized Suck him off to clear the pipes And he's good to go
Repeat once a week Or more often if you like Results may vary
--
She'd teased him for weeks: Talons dancing on his shaft, Making his balls ache
If he got too close, She'd grab one nut in each paw And squeeeeze until soft
Then she'd start again: Stroking, sucking -- fucking, too Driving her man wild
Cock as hard as stone Gonads swollen from abuse Desperate to cum
She watched his dick twitch Drooling precum down his shaft Onto his blue balls
When she took mercy And let her mate blow his load It was a geyser
Ropes and ropes of cum A month's work of scrambled spunk All over the room
He moaned with relief She just grinned and gave his sac One more friendly slap