FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

"Eeuhuhuuhhuhu-huhuhuh...." she shivered...

It was really freaking cold in this cupboard. Like, stupidly cold.

With her paws hog-tied together, Rain Flower tried to roll again, but again it only made things worse. The thin layer of ice that had formed around and under the naturally-moist Vaporeon cracked and its pitiful insulation was lost.

"Eugh-ghf-fk-fk-fk-fk-fk!" chattered Rain Flower.

She decided to lay back down and press herself against the crunching, iced-over clear poly-pockets full of documents. They pressed in at her from all sides... It wasn't as if she was going to be able to roll off, anywhere, anyway...

Stupid Prometheus. Stupid, grumpy, sexy, beautiful, giant-dicked...

Rain Flower, musing bitterly to herself, quickly cheered, her eyes dilating as she considered the giant cock of Prometheus. A canine dick at least as big as she was... and burning with the Arcaninetales incredible heat... So hot, so tantalisingly unavailable. So hot... She forgot whatever else it was she had been thinking about. She frowned, in confusion...

Oh yeah. She was stuck here in this cupboard. Stuck, cold and BORED. She sighed, almost filling the available volume with her misted breath. (It wouldn't be so bad if her paws were tied at her front. At least then she could try masturbating; it might pass the time.)

There was literally no fun to be had in this cupboard. It was like she just had to lie here and think about what she had done, or something.

It sucked... and not in a fun way. Like when she'd locked Redtales down in Pissy-Prissy Elegance's weird death-bed... or found Firenze in the bath... or even better, last time she'd gotten the Keldeo, Aquarius, alone in a closet... This, unlike that, was boring and cold and uncomfortable and cold and annoying and COLD!

Stupid, sexy Prometheus... She growled a little at the unpleasant feeling in her gut. Which was totally due to the cold and not guilt, she thought. Oh no, not guilt at all..

Groaning slowly until she'd hidden herself in mist again and gradually being forced, perhaps by the enclosing ice, to think on what she'd done, Rain Flower pouted.

Oh, poor Prometheus... his face...

She heard the door opening and Rain Flower almost sprang up and shouted. Someone was coming! Sweet freedom!

She almost shouted out until she heard Clarice's voice and remembered whose office's closet she had been trapped in.

"...and you're sure of the quality of this..?" said the gravelly, older Glaceon, "It cost a lot of money. It looks cheap for the amount of money I paid..."

"Ma'am, I'm just the delivery guy," said a deep, male human voice, pushing something into the room that sounded like it was rolling heavily, "but these custom Poképlush™ chairs are the best on the market, tailored to the type of Pokemon perfectly." For a delivery guy, he did a good job of sounding like a sales'mon, "Why; forget the active massagers, servo adjustments, intelligent posture control. That's just icing." She heard him pat the padding, "This stuff'll be attuned to your Ice type physiology in a way that just feels great. You'll see."

"Huh," said Clarice, sounding as unimpressed and impassive as ever, "Yeah, that's what the catalogue said, but it still looks cheaper than I'd like. Put it behind my desk."

"...Yes ma'am," said the man, driving the trundling, unseen chair around the room. "You honestly made the right decision. There's a money-back guarantee if you're not satisfied, but trust me; You won't be wanting your money back."

"Hmmmmmmph," said the Glaceon, sounding emphatically unimpressed. Rain Flower would swear she could hear her lips pursing together in that trademark punched-by-a-lemon scowl.

"Alright," said the man, "Happy to help; have a nice day, y'all!"

Clarice made a growling, gravelly noise. It might have been acknowledgement or disgust.

"Hey," said the apparently irrepressible man, "Anything more I can do for you that might get ya to smile..?"

"...Smile..?" asked Clarice, as if the man had just asked her something odd, then her voice fell to a low growl, "I had a happy smile once. It was the envy of all around. They used to come and see me smile and walk away smiling themselves. Then I met a man who called himself The Tooth Collector and he said I could be his friend..." at that point, Clarice just sank off into a low growl.

She remained silently until the man, in awkward silence, left and closed the door.

"...Eugh," said Clarice, "He let in the disgusting warmth. Typical... Typical, that's just typical."

Rain Flower lay quietly, wondering if Clarice would like the new seat. She should have shouted out, then, but the until-then understimulated Vaporeon was now firmly invested in the plot and damn the ice. "Sit on the chair," she muttered to herself.

Clarice moved so slowly that she seemed to take an agonising age to do it, but the Glaceon made her way across the room with Rain Flower watching her invisibly from behind the door, waiting patiently until she heard Clarice hop up onto the cheer and listened to the upholstery squeak until it had accepted Clarice's more than ample form.

"Oohhh..." groaned Clarice, "That's good, that's good, that's gooooood..." and then chuckled, softly. It was a weird sound that stunned Rain Flower for a second. Clarice went on, "Hrm... wonder what all these buttons do..." there was a soft click and a strangle, wobbling, buzzing noise started.

Clarice apparently got a start, "Oh... woah.. woaaaaahh..!" Hearing her gravelly voice rise in pleasure that was as obvious as it was obviously alien, was almost disturbing, even for Rain Flower. Especially when that rising noise became aggressive and Clarice settled into a long, low, throaty groan...

"Well alright!" cried an amazed, oddly excited Rain Flower, "She likes the chair..!"

There was a surprised noise from Clarice, shortly followed by a noise like something falling over and a noise like something hitting something. Angrier noises came from outside the door, leaving Rain Flower to wonder what was happening.

The buzzing came to an abrupt halt, being replaced by a frigid growl and Rain Flower heard Clarice storming towards the closet.

The door opened hard, a forceful, cool draught seeming to help it along and Rain Flower found herself looking up at Clarice from her shelf. "Hey, Ice-bitch!" she said, "Let me out of your damn office! It's freaking cold in here..!"

Clarice, the Glaceon now visible in all of her unusually tall, overweight, seemingly 'grim-blue' furred, thick, cyan spectacled anti-glory gazed down at the diminutive Vaporeon and worked her jaw like she was chewing the name as she growled it, "Rain Flower..."

Rain Flower frowned, "Yeah. It's me. Can you let me out, now? I'm gonna freeze to death in here!" To make her point, she lifted her front end up, breaking the ice around her and dislodging more that had accumulated on top, sending crackling fragments skittering down onto the floor around her.

"What. Are you doing. In my closet..?" asked Clarice, at a deadpan growl.

The temperature in the room seemed to drop even lower. I'm stuck, obviously! I wouldn't be hanging around here if I could help it!" She glared at the Glaceon, "You know your office is too damn cold..?"

Clarice's eyes narrowed, fractionally, though the movement was magnified by her thick glasses, "Why are you stuck in my closet? Who put you here? Was it October?"

"Redtales..?" asked Rain Flower, looking at the Glaceon, smiling with both eyebrows raised, as if she were an idiot, "No way. You're getting it wrong as to which of us is holding the ass-whoopin' stick, there!"

"Hrrrf... yeah..." growled the Glaceon, grumpy disapproval in her eyes, "I've heard rumour of your assaults on him, but he hasn't made a complaint... I need a complaint to take action..."

Rain Flower rolled her eyes with animated dismissal, "Of course not," she said bluntly, "he's no snitch! Are you gonna untie me, already?"

Clarice's stare became tangibly colder. As in, the temperature around the ice type literally dropped. Fog began to condense around her, pouring to the ground in slow, creeping tendrils Cold-eyed, Clarice stared at the small Vaporeon, "Who tied you up and why did they do it..?"

She was looking up at Clarice's eyes, which being pinpoint white pupils upon seemingly featureless midnight-blue were cold and sharp indeed, strange and unsettling... The glasses made them look even bigger and more ominous. Something about the Glaceon's piercing glare forced honesty to Rain Flower's impulsive surface, "It was Prometheus..! ...Because I hit him with a Hydro Pump! ...but it was an accident! It was alright because I was trying to hit Redtales!"

Clarice somehow seemed to loom larger. With even angrier eyes, as cold and deadly as any blizzard.

Rain Flower's confession went on, the girl beginning to babble under the intensity of that icy gaze. "I didn't mean to hit him! I felt pretty bad about it! I even let Redtales get away!"

"Rain Flower..." there was something disturbing about the way Clarice pronounced that name, like an unpleasant lump of gristle in her food, "I'm getting sick of dealing with reports of your assaults upon staff. Your rumoured behaviour's nearly as bad as Eclipse's-"

"WHAT!?" cried out Rain Flower, in protest. She wasn't nearly that bad... was she?

Clarice's piercing eyes silenced her. The Glaceon went on, grimly, "...and just like him, you're a few complaints away from serious action being taken against you, no matter how good your performance is. We have standards of conduct to uphold, here. Standards that don't tolerate assault. This is a clean and professional house of comfort and we have to draw the line."

More than what she said, the way Clarice had said it had Rain Flower in thrall. This sounded pretty serious.

Seeing she had the Vaporeon's attention, Clarice went on, "Even if we take your excellent surface numbers into account and the fact that you never cash your pay account, you're responsible for a lot of the unauthorised, untransactioned, unsanctioned, and undocumented... intra-staff... liaisons, around here. You're lucky Mister Firenze thinks those liaisons are good for morale, because otherwise you'd be paying a fortune in your fellow Waiter's time and valuable, expensive procreational resources..."

Of course, with long and boring words rolling in, Rain Flower's attention didn't last long, nor her quiet. "Don't compare me to Eclipse!"

Clarice stared at her, "...and why not..?"

"Eclipse is a bully!" said Rain Flower, "and he's a GUY!"

Clarice continued to stare, coldly. "What difference does that make?"

Rain Flower rolled her eyes so hard her head moved with them, "Don't give me that! It's okay for girls to knock guys around, some! They can take it! Who's gonna handle 'em if we gals don't, huh? Pokeguys have a lot of hot spirit, we gals have to cool 'em off!"

"...If I took that attitude," said Clarice, her voice heavily deadpan, though laden, seriously, with ominous growl, "half this Café would be dead..."

Something about her tone made Rain Flower believe her. It briefly quietened her as she stared, worriedly, at the Glaceon.

"Frankly, Rain Flower," said Clarice, eventually, "You've got a lot of disgustingly hot spirit yourself. Almost as bad as October; A matter which is being taken care of even as we speak, as you well know."

Rain Flower made a sarcastic noise and looked away, "Shoulda just left him to me..."

"Honestly, Rain Flower," continued Clarice, "You could stand to 'cool off,' yourself. Maybe think a bit more seriously about your behaviour before I'm forced to do something about it." Clarice turned away from her then and started walking towards the door.

"Wait, what..?" said Rain Flower, staring at Clarice's slowly retreating ass.

Clarice casually opened the door and started making her way out of the room.

"You can't leave me in here!" protested Rain Flower.

With a freezing gust of wind, the door slammed shut behind the Glaceon, flowing over the walls and spitefully chilling the already-cooled Vaporeon. She shivered, loudly. "Eughhuhuhuhuh...." at least until she had the breath to shout, "BITCH!"

She couldn't believe this! The unbelievable nerve! Just because Clarice was her boss, chief HR disciplinarian and perfectly entitled, as far as she could tell, to say and do these things to her, Rain Flower was not happy!

She was freezing her ass off in here and Clarice was going to make it worse, just to rub some more... ice into the... ice? She was done thinking about this, already. She thought... then she frowned for a second.

The metaphorical gears and components of Rain Flowers brain might have in simile been compared to the squeaking of loose plastic cogs accompanied by the screech of a tuning analogue radio. At least, one would certainly expect that from the twitching of fins and the odd facial expressions she pulled as for this brief and critical period, Rain Flower's acting impulse was actually to THINK.

Plaisir should have trembled.

* * *

Clarice had just turned around the corner from her office and was walking the short distance towards the staff room, feeling somewhat satisfied with herself. This wasn't such a bad day, all things considered. Rain Flower and October both getting some much needed discipline and she'd only needed to put a note of reward attached to October's Hygiene Notice on the staff noticeboard to set it all in motion. There had been some disruption around the Café for a while, of course, but ultimately, things were going very well, indeed...

Opening the door to the Staff Lounge from the direction of the Admin Offices and Quarters was always satisfying. As soon as that door was opened, the wide variety of Pokemon who were sitting, enjoying their disgustingly warm food and drinks, slouching and chatting, would straighten up and quieten down at once. Especially when they saw that it was Clarice. There was a certain shifting spectrum of expressions ranging from from 'uh-oh' to gradually down to 'oh-no' that she appreciated.

Suddenly there was a crashing noise, then a sound like a fire hydrant letting off pressure,, followed shortly thereafter by another, louder crash and a repeat of the whooshing noise.

Clarice was left standing there in shock, halfway through the doorway, looking over her shoulder when she saw the source of the sounds. Her expensive new Pokeplush™ chair appeared and slammed back-first into the flat of the t-junction from the direction of her office. Blinking, she was no less astonished when the chair-reoriented itself so that the back was facing Clarice and once again started accelerating!

"What the-" Clarice had just about time to say before she was forced, in a most undignified manner, to scarper out of the way of the errant furniture!

Bursting into the Staff Lounge, Pokemon fled before whatever might be chasing the Ice Queen of HR. Many burst out of the opposite door, reasoning that they didn't want to be anywhere near this scene. The rest gawped in astonishment as Clarice fled from a large white office chair, propelled at the head of a jet of water...

Clarice veered off to one side as the chair pursued her, knocking aside lounge chairs and smaller Pokemon alike, but that chair kept on in hot pursuit of the fleeing Glaceon.

At least, until the HR Dictatoress took stock of her situation. Her eyes briefly glowed as she kept on, in a suddenly lightly loping pace... The temperature of the room shot down, there were murmurs of surprise from all around and suddenly, the staff lounge found itself reverberating with the groaning cracks of a room suddenly forming a layer of ice a centimetre thick without warning.

Just about everyone was in too much surprise to catch it, but Clarice lightly touched down upon the surface of the ice and skated out of the way of the now out-of-control chair with a casual and featherlight grace.

The chair sailed into the wall, hard enough that Clarice was wincing hard as she came to a stop... then snarling even harder as the source of the chair's locomotion became obvious.

Grinning wickedly, like an imp or a devil, still tied up, was Rain Flower, wedged into her seat, holding onto the control arm with her thick, long swimming tail.

"I got your chair, Ice-bitch..!" taunted Rain Flower.

"You give that back..! Get out of there!" growled the Glaceon in response.

"Nuh-uh-uh!" said Rain Flower, shaking her head, slowly, "You were gonna leave me to freeze in there!"

"I would have let you out," hissed Clarice, "Eventually; You had too much defiance left, Rain Flower..."

The Vaporeon blew a very rude raspberry at the Glaceon.

Clarice snarled harder, "GET. OUT. OF, MY, CHAIR..!" she said with glacial firmness, a cold wind picking up around the Glaceon.

Rain Flower's response was another sudden jet of water which had Clarice ducking, then, as it scythed across the room had everyone either leaping to the floor or being thrown to the floor by the water's surprisingly hefty impact..

The chair, spun by the jet, scraped away from the wall and set off moving again, on an unpredictable, wobbling vector, riding on a column of water that was shattering mugs, scattering Pokemon and tracking crazily through the room.

Clarice could only watch in horror as Rain Flower somehow accomplished the incredible task of piloting a low-friction office-chair around an uneven rink by intuition and water-jet impulse alone.

Cackling, Rain Flower rammed the chair out of the staff exit and out towards... Oh no...

Clarice ran after the laughing Rain Flower out of the lounge, watching her careen off the wall and rocket straight towards the Guest Quarters.

"Rain Flower!" shouted Clarice, ducking the Vaporeon's renewed stream of 'thrust,' "Stop this, right now!"

Rain Flower's response was a prolonged, cackling laugh as she burst through a knot of surprised human guests, sending the people diving for cover as an expensive chair seemingly tried to take them out.

Growling, trying to keep up, Clarice was considering her options. "Dammit, stop..!" she hissed, reddening as the spectacle became ever more public.

"Ya want me to stop..?" asked Rain Flower, with a teasing grin, as the chair continued to coast away from Clarice.

"Yes..!" hissed the Glaceon.

"You ready to make a deal..?" asked Rain Flower, grinning harder.

"A deal..?" Clarice looked shocked and appalled, "No! Get out of my chair you loose and vapid-"

"Uh-oh!" said Rain Flower loudly, cutting her off, singing, "Looks like someone wants me to steer this thing out across the balcony, then down through the main bar and out into the carpark..!"

"You wouldn't..." growled Clarice.

Rain Flower's evil smile said without a shadow of a doubt that she would do exactly that... and more...

"What's the deal..?" asked Clarice, snarling sharply.

Rain Flower was chuckling wickedly as she let the chair slow to a stop.

Clarice was looking at her like she wanted to kill her. It was a delight to the smugly smiling Vaporeon.

"A few things," said Rain Flower, imperiously, "Firstly; Rain Flower is not to be compared to Eclipse! I'm way cuter and that lets me get away with things!" She smiled and nodded, then went on, "Secondly; You're gonna untie me from this chair if you want it back in one piece! ...and Third!" she quickly added, "Third; You're gonna tell me what the hell you were on about regarding..." she creased her brow, "Unaut-or-eyes procri... money stuff. Tell me about the money stuff."

Clarice frowned. "I'll untie you, but you're expected to live up to the same standards as everyone else."

"Nuh-uh," said Rain Flower, "Rain Flower SETS the standards. Rain Flower does all the work around here!" The Vaporeon frowned, "Rain Flower keeps the boys in hand and happy. Rain Flower takes clients in the morning and the evening and the nighttime, picking up slack on every shift! Rain Flower takes more cock in a day than your frigid body has ever seen, Ice-bitch! So you better give Rain Flower her credit..!"

Clarice growled and ground her teeth, but didn't deny any of it. Instead, after a pause, she said, "You do a lot of work," she admitted, "but you're undisciplined, unpresentable and you make for a lot of waste..."

"Rain Flower gets what she needs to get the job done!" declared Rain Flower, "Speakin' of which, explain more about the money."

So Clarice ground her teeth and did. Explained about the large amount of pay Rain Flower had piled up in her account by working constantly and barely spending any of it - and none of that outside the Café. Clarice also explained how she felt that intra-staff sexual encounters ought to be paid for like any other and how that running total in her sight (alone) ruined Clarice's otherwise wonderful numbers, as far as Rain Flower was concerned. "...The worst part is the amount of precious seed you waste..." she muttered.

Rain Flower practically spat, "Pfah! Rain Flower earned those procreational resources, Ice-bitch!" of course, now what she knew what that meant, she was somehow able to remember the words, "more than you..!"

"Seed is money, vapour-brain!" hissed Clarice, "and in that respect, you're the biggest money sink around here!"

Rain Flower cackled, proudly, "Deal with it!" she shouted, "You told me something cool, though..."

Clarice stared at her, refusing to answer the prompt. In fact, she seemed to be using her time to try and kill the Vaporeon with her eyes, alone.

"All this time..." Rain Flower cackled, wickedly, "I've been chasin' him around, he's been setting lighting-fleas on me, I've been hosin' him, he does weird stuff and puts me off... all this time he's been gettin' away from Rain Flower's tender lovin' care..." her laughter was positively evil.

No sound came from Clarice but for the grinding of teeth.

Rain Flower continued, "...All this time and you're tellin' me I could have just BOUGHT Redtales's's'sz assz..?" Rain Flower took a second to spit out the unintended speech impediment. Looking briefly crazy as she licked at the fangs of her lower jaw.

"...Yes," said Clarice, "In fact, that's what you're SUPPOSED to do," she growled. Rain Flower giggled over that last part, though.

"Then some Redtales's is part of the deal!" declared Rain Flower.

"Mmmm..." grunted Clarice, "He has the right to refuse a customer, you know."

"Part of the deal, Ice-bitch," said Rain Flower, "Don't make me get scratchy, I'm feelin' scratchy..."

"Wait a minute," said Clarice, suddenly smiling, "You've just given me a great idea, a great idea, oh yes..."

Rain Flower cocked her head, confused.

Clarice smiled, smiling the wicked, heartless smile of the head HR lady, "It may just be we can help each other out, after all, Rain Flower..." she said, "With a certain red-tailed problem, who's getting his act cleaned up right now. A certain pretty-furred, rebellious idiot who, for lack of proper Bedroom Waiter Evaluation and Pro-squared-Creation Sample-processing, could be making this Café a lot more money than he is as a bad Floor Waiter on the graveyard shift..."

Rain Flower made a confused, rising, trilling noise.

"Rain Flower," said Clarice, still grinning with all the fanged, sharp pleasantness of a shark, "Given that it means that he literally couldn't say no to you; How would you like to start off October's Evaluation..?"

Rain Flower grinned, then started laughing, a high, cackling noise, then Clarice joined her, a low, gravelly and thoroughly evil sounding laugh that could only have come from the very heart of true cruelty at Plaisir.

People and Pokemon fled the disturbing noise. As well they should. For that day, two of the most influential females of Café Plaisir, Promiscuous Water and Prudish Ice temporarily resolved their axiomatic differences and joined forces to hatch the first stage of a most terrible plan against a most unfortunate Ninetales...