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Waning Heart

_ DISCLAIMER: All characters and properties are copyright their respective owners. All writing and original characters are copyright 2010 Zephyr Paws. The author is in no way associated or affiliated with any third-party. This original fiction was created with no intention of any copyright infringement against any third-party, and is purely for fan enjoyment. _

WARNING: This story contains sexual acts and descriptions of sex between two Pokemon. It also contains first-person descriptions of internal emotional turmoil that follows rape, as well as the struggles in getting past it. If any of these things bother you - at least when reading them in a fictional story (real rape is awful!) - or if you are under 18 years old (or whatever it is in your area), then stop reading now and, um, do something else. Of course.

-~ Chapter 7: Pride and Pressure ~-

The next morning, I woke up right next to Gin again. We must have fallen asleep together in the same bed like we did the other night... but I didn't mind it quite as much now that we were closer. It felt a lot more right.

As we feasted on some of the berries and mushrooms he had stored away in his cave for breakfast, he told me more of his amazing stories, such as traveling to the top of Mt. Coronet, enduring a raging blizzard all just to see what the view was like at the top.

"It was absolutely spectacular!" he exclaimed, standing up and waving his arms around to display his excitement. "Like something you couldn't really explain with words. The ruins, oh doll, those ruins... Legend says that's where Dialga and Palkia were sealed away!"

"D-Dialga and Palkia?" I asked, not familiar with either of those names.

"They're the Pokemon that created space and time. Supposedly they still govern those two things as well."

Listening to him tell his stories was nothing short of enjoyable... Gin knew so much. He was just so intelligent and was so knowledgeable about the world I knew comparatively little about.

He never seemed to be interested in Mt. Moon, though, or whatever my life was like back home. Maybe it was just because I was too shy to interrupt him or start up my own topic of conversation, or maybe it was because he just wasn't all that interested. Whatever the case, I didn't feel it was of urgent enough need to complain about...

After all, he was far more exciting than I was, and I wanted to hear everything about him. I'd gladly listen to story after story of his.

"Hey, go get me some more of those berries," said Gin, sitting down again and pointing over towards the pile of berries on the other side of the room.

"Right away!" I exclaimed back, getting up and quickly running over to the berries to grab some for him to eat. I was full, but I wanted to make sure I pleased Gin and brought him back plenty of delicious berries.

Filling up my hands with some berries, I walked back over to Gin and handed them to him. He quickly snatched them without saying so much as a thank you and started gobbling them up. I smiled back at him, pleased to please him.

I watched Gin consume berry after berry, staring at him with a look of adoration. The more I stared at him, the more I found myself thinking about him and thinking about us. It seemed unreal that he cared about a worthless Pokemon like me... but he really did seem to care.

He finished up and let out a loud burp, patting his stomach as he leaned back a bit. "Get over here, cupcake."

I walked over to him and lay down beside him. "H-hi," I said shyly, still feeling nervous and fluttery whenever I'd talk to him.

The Gabite rolled over and grabbed my chest, then started rubbing his claw in it. It felt very interesting, to say the least... I wasn't quite sure what he intended by it, but it did make my heart skip a few beats as he rubbed his claw tenderly across my chest.

"You're my cutie pie, you know that, right?" he asked, circling his claw on my chest and starting to circle closer down to my belly. "You know you always want to make me happy, right?"

"Y-yes..." I replied, wondering where he was going with that.

His intentions became a little more clear as he started reaching that claw even lower down my body, no longer circling it and instead running it down my groin, stopping just a few inches before my girlhood.

My heart raced as he did that. I felt a mixture of confusion, worry, and arousal... I couldn't tell what exactly I wanted him to do or what I was going to do to stop him - or if I even felt the need to stop him.

He loved me, so shouldn't I trust in what he was doing to me? Shouldn't I trust that everything was going to be okay?

"Just tell me that you want me to stop..."

He brought his claw right down to my clit and rubbed it gently, causing me to twitch and quiver all over. I felt rather reluctant to let him do what he was doing, but at the same time I felt somewhat excited, too.

It was a very confusing rush of emotions. A lot of it reminded me of when Tom molested me like that... just how horrible and violating it felt. But Gin made me feel differently. He was going slowly, with that same tantalizing feel that Tom gave at first, but it didn't feel as malicious... it was Gin doing it, not Tom.

He continued rubbing my sensitive nub in a circular fashion, tickling the underside of my hood in a very sensual way. I lightly moaned as he did so, finding myself unable to resist the feelings of his tender treatment.

I bit my lip and clenched my fists as I got into what he was doing even more. It wasn't due to pain, but just anxiety and nervousness. The confusion was what was getting to me the most, because I still wasn't entirely sure just how far he was planning to go.

The Gabite then lowered his claw and slowly parted my folds with it, touching my even pinker flesh and running it down right to my opening. It felt so familiar... so familiar... I held my breath as I awaited the inevitable.

Sure enough, the inevitable came. Without any verbal confirmation, Gin pushed his claw inside of me. Going very slow, he slid a little bit of it in before sliding it out without any pause, only to push it back inside. He wasted no further time with taunting or teasing and began a rhythm of pushing his claw in and out of me.

I certainly didn't feel the pleasure anymore as he shifted from clitoral pleasure to a more internal method... instead it only reminded me of when Tom molested me that very first time. I couldn't help it, but it had very much the same feeling. It didn't feel like I really mattered as much as I thought I did, and though he may have just been doing it to help me feel good or return the favor or something, it certainly wasn't effective if that was his intention.

"I can see why you're so desirable, my dear..." said the Gabite in a suave manner as he kept up inserting his claw in and out of me. "Who wouldn't want some of that..."

That started creeping me out to be honest. I don't know if he was trying to help reassure me or if he was just talking nonsense in the moment, but it wasn't what someone who'd had to suffer through rape numerous times wanted to hear.

I felt really nervous about asking him to stop, worried that he might take offense to it. I didn't want to hurt his feelings or make him upset, but what he was doing was crossing that line, that feeling of safeness I felt when I was around him. I had to stop. I didn't want to continue. It was making me uncomfortable and drudging up horrible, awful memories and feelings I wasn't ready to feel again.

It was entirely different sucking on his member, because, although that also had past trauma attached to the act, I didn't feel like he was personally violating my body as much. Yes, my mouth, yes, but not my body... not my girlhood or anything else private to me. Plus I was willing then. I was no longer willing as he continued...

"S-stop... p-please..." I begged quietly, only hoping I spoke loud enough for him to hear.

Seeing as he stopped pushing - though still had his claw inside of me - I figured he must have heard. "Why? Don't you want this?" he asked, staring up at me with a confused look on his face. "Don't you... love me?"

I blushed. I did love him... at least I thought I did. I believed that he loved me, and he certainly treated me better than any Pokemon before, so that feeling must have been love... and I definitely knew I was genuinely attracted to him. "I... I d-do..."

"Then what's your problem?" The tone in his voice was a bit more aggressive than I would have liked. Not only that, but I felt his claw tense up while still inside of me. "You know you want me to do this to you... it's because I love you."

I couldn't help but look down at him, nervous and timid, blinking several times. "I- I-..." I wasn't exactly sure what I wanted to say or how I wanted to tell him - if I wanted to tell him - that I didn't want him to do that.

Before I could say anything, he pushed his claw up against my inner walls, applying a lot of pressure to it. It actually started hurting. "Now let me finish, babe, okay?"

After that, he pushed his claw further in, going in deeper than he was before. I winced in response to his unwelcome advances. He wasn't listening to me, was he?

He made three or four full claw thrusts inside of me before I willed up enough courage to speak up again. "N-no... p-please... I don't want to..."

Gin rolled his eyes and stopped his claw thrusting once more. Rather than applying pressure or inducing pain, he withdrew his claw entirely from my vagina, then looked at his lightly-damp claw and sighed. "Fine, just fine."

He sat down instead and crossed his arms together, looking quite upset with me. I sat up as well and looked at him with a look of concern, feeling really bad. He looked so angry... so disappointed... like I was denying him something.

But that shouldn't matter, should it? I didn't want him to continue... I felt uncomfortable. I didn't want to go through that feeling again... especially if it would lead to something I'd definitely regret...

"Yeah, just fine." He continued mumbling to himself a bit, eyes closed and still baring that rather pissed expression. "I guess we don't have to be mates, then. Who needs to be mates. I mean we can just sit and eat berries all day and never do anything and always be unhappy with how things are."

That sarcastic way he was speaking... it was really saddening. It made me feel guilty. Mates... mates... did he want to be my mate...? "M-mates...?" I asked, just to see what he meant by that. Though after asking that, I realized I should have apologized instead for making him upset.

"Yeah, I want to be your mate. Don't you want that?" He opened his eyes and looked at me with a very disappointed look on his face. "You... you wouldn't want me to leave you for another... more willing Pokemon, would you, honey?"

Hearing that made my heart skip a beat. It felt like it stopped beating altogether, but just the thought of losing the one thing in life that made me happy brought a shiver of worry down my spine. "N-no! P-please...!" I fell forward and crawled over to him, holding onto his leg or whatever part of him I could grab. "Please..."

"Please, what?" he asked, still sounding upset. "Please suppress my happiness for a long time? Please not be a mate with you but be there to feed you and pretend to care?"

Why was he acting so... poorly? Was I really making him that upset? Was it really that wrong of me to want him to stop? I never should have done that... I shouldn't have... If I just let him continue, I would have been spared how he was treating me.

"Well?" He grabbed me by the arm and lifted me up so I was on his lap. "I love you, muffin, but you can't expect me to love you unless you do something for that love..."

I looked up at him, nervous and scared. I blinked several times before asking that difficult question. "W-what... what do I have to d-do?" In a way, I didn't want to know the answer, but I had a feeling I'd find out...

Rather than answer with words, he answered with actions, leaning forward and slowly lowering me onto my back with him lying on top of me. "I want to mate with you. I want to know you're mine."

I blushed heavily. Why was I not surprised that was what he wanted? Where did the nice Gabite that I knew just the other day go? Where did those feelings of attraction and adoration go? I didn't feel them anymore... instead I just found myself being manipulated once again.

It didn't feel like my opinion really mattered. He wanted to mate with me, to do to me what several others have done forcefully before.

I didn't want to be wrong about him, though... he was still the nicest male I've ever known... he saved me from being raped by that Machoke - well, at least from letting it continue. He gave me a place to stay... he told me that he loved me and that he wanted me to be his mate...

"You don't want to disappoint me, do you? You love me, right?" he asked, staring into my eyes while on top of me. "Right?"

"I- I d-do..." I answered meekly. Taking a deep breath and letting out a large sigh, I gave him the answer that he wanted to hear. "M-mate with me then..."

The Gabite's facial expression changed immediately from a look of disappointment to one of satisfaction, seeming to possess what almost looked like a smirk on it. "Good, good, you're going to love this..."

Somehow I doubted it. I certainly hadn't loved it any of the other times I was forced into it, so why would I love it any differently?

He didn't pin me down as roughly as the Machoke did, but he was still on top of me and started gyrating his hips against my own. I felt that familiar body part tickle my groin and grow increasingly hard.

Gin leaned in and kissed me, which I had to admit felt really, really good. He locked me in a very deep, passionate kiss as he continued thrusting against me, feeling rather eager to get inside. Oh... Gin... your kisses... why did they seem so confusing now? Why?

When I was first kissed by Gin, I thought he would protect me from more of those situations... He made me blush, he took the breath right out of my mouth... so why was it that he was about to mate with me against my wishes? Why was it that his opinion was more important than mine?

Because... because he saved me... I closed my eyes and nearly started to cry as I realized that, once again, I was the weak female allowing myself to get taken advantage of. He was the big, strong male... of course he was right. Of course I could never do anything out of line...

He saved me... and he took care of me... if mating with him was how it had to be, that was how it had to be... if I really did love him, of course I would mate with him... I had to be strong... I had to be loving and affectionate like that female Sneasel who seemed so confident in herself.

I had to be... I simply had to... otherwise... otherwise... he said it himself... he'd leave me.

I shook my head as I felt his member part my folds and slide up and down that delicate piece of flesh on my outside. It felt significantly different from either Tom or that Machoke because I at least knew Gin and had a really good look at that piece of malehood earlier to know its appearance.

Without wasting too much more time, he brought the tip of his member right up to my opening and slowly slid it inside, pushing himself into me. I quivered as I felt him enter, feeling a mix of emotions swirl around in my heart.

The Gabite wasn't forceful or rough with me... he pushed himself in slowly and cautiously, looking right into my face as he did so. He smiled as he slid even more of himself into me, but looked like he was genuinely happy, and it wasn't because he was dominating or raping me like all of the other males I'd been with.

He was happy... I was making him happy... that was something that should have made me happy... but that feeling, that feeling of something entering my deepest innards... it was still quite nerve-wracking.

I gritted my teeth as he continued pushing inside more rather than pulling out a bit. I was probably fairly well stretched due to the earlier works of his claw, but it still didn't change the fact that it hurt somewhat. He was rather big and thick, after all, not to mention there was the emotional pain of having to go through those physical feelings again.

My heart raced even more as he stopped with several inches inside of me. He blinked and then leaned in to kiss me again. It was just a more gentle, quick kiss, but after he brought his head away, he looked back at me with a dreamy look on his face...

"My darling Clefable... my sweet Brandy... mmmm... my mate..." he said softly, still staring at me with that delighted expression. He then licked my face and pulled a bit of his member out of me, only to push it back in and start a rhythm of light thrusting.

I blushed more, feeling really embarrassed over how sweet he was being, but also feeling so wanted because of it. Even though he did persuade me to do something I would rather have not been doing... he really did make me feel important to him, like he really wanted me specifically, and not just to use me...

Oh, Gin... I felt so confused. I wasn't sure whether I was feeling pain or pleasure, whether I was happy or sad. I just felt... like I was making you happy. And maybe that was all I needed...

It then hit me after he made several more thrusts inside of me. He called me... his mate. I wasn't just being raped or abused, but I was actually mating with him, as... as his mate. I moaned as I felt overwhelmed from the thought of that and the surge of pleasure that struck my body as I was filled with more than just a male's penis, but with a mate's love...

My mate... Gin... I stared up at him as he continued thrusting into me, starting to drool a bit and looking all the more content. He really was very cute... very adorable... and he was m- mine...

I was making him happy by letting him mate with me. I felt fulfilled mating with him, like it was something I was supposed to be doing and like it just felt right. And I felt happy by making him happy.

As we continued mating, feelings of pleasure started building up in my body. The way he was mating with me felt even greater than any other time I'd been taken like that. With every dynamic thrust he made deep into my depths, I squealed in delight as I felt a burning warm sensation pass through my groin for just a second as he passed across it.

It was very difficult to describe, but it was absolutely amazing... I finally felt pleasure from mating...! Maybe that was what I was supposed to be feeling all along? Maybe that was what drove the female Sneasel to crave sex the way she did?

Every thrust he made into me now felt like it was bringing me closer and closer to some great feeling that I couldn't describe. My toes started to curl and I found myself unable to resist bucking my hips in a rhythm matching his.

My moaning picked up in intensity as I felt that strange burning sensation between my legs grow stronger and stronger. My entire body was tensing up in a way I hadn't felt before. It was almost overwhelming.

I closed my eyes and released a loud cry as I felt an incredible sensation surge through my body and throb deep down in my insides, feeling extremely powerful and like I had literally reached some unbelievable peak of pleasure.

That amazing feeling lasted for several seconds as I felt Gin's member even more sensitively than I had before, like every single thrust it made into me was being gripped and hugged tightly by my throbbing insides.

It eventually subsided and I found myself almost entirely out of breath as Gin continued thrusting inside of me. My cheeks were burning hot and I was completely exhausted, particularly down there. It was hard to describe and the repeated insertions of the Gabite's member almost felt somewhat uncomfortable.

Perhaps that was the feeling of orgasm... something that I thought only males were capable of feeling. I had come to learn that that moment was what was the clearest indicator that they were done, and perhaps I now had some understanding of exactly why they had to pause when they hit that point... it felt just so satisfying and exhausting that they had no other choice.

Mmmm... I lightly mumbled to myself as I felt the Gabite make one final push into me before hilting me and hitting his own orgasm. The familiar feeling of having a male's seed launched deep inside of me felt far more pleasurable and satisfying now that it was after I had reached a pinnacle of my own pleasure and felt far too relaxed to feel disgusted by it like I normally was.

"Ohhhh... Brandy..." moaned Gin as he finished squirting out his semen into my depths. I could feel his penis pulse inside of my own quivering walls... and it felt really fulfilling. I couldn't quite understand how it could feel so much more fulfilling... but it did.

But what followed his ejaculation was even more sweet. After his cumming had subsided, he leaned in forward and locked lips with me in another kiss, though this one much more passionate and deep. He placed his claws to the sides of my face and really got into the kiss, holding me tenderly while locked together both above and below.

"You're my mate now..." he said softly as he broke the lock he had on my lips, keeping his mouth just barely over my own, panting a bit still.

That was right. The Gabite was really my mate. It felt almost too hard to believe, but him saying it that way made it echo through my mind like it never had before. I wasn't just some toy to some aggressive male Pokemon. No, I was a male's mate, a male's second half. I was Gin's... and he was mine.

I pulled him in and hugged him like I'd never hugged another Pokemon before - which wasn't far off, really, as the only other Pokemon I'd hugged was daddy, and he was a bit... less than soft. Embracing Gin, the wonderful Gabite on top of me, felt absolutely incredible.

Why did I doubt him? Why did I doubt what he was doing to me? Why did I ever have doubts about mating with him? I wasn't raped... not really... it might not have been what I wanted at first, but looking at how it turned out... how could I complain?

It felt so delightful enjoying my afterglow with Gin. We just continued embracing each other for the next half hour or so until he got up and ate another few berries. I went over to join him and we shared a nice lunch together, now officially more than just 'roommates.'

***

The next few days passed in a similar way. Gin was extremely sweet with me, always wanting to hold me and touch me, and after a bit of that, he started kissing me to the point where I found him on top of me again.

Much of the stigma I felt about mating seemed to fade away as he showed me more what it was supposed to be like. Every time we mated, it felt incredibly fulfilling not just for him, but for me as well, which was a totally foreign concept to me.

In fact, it was almost getting to the point where I enjoyed mating with him... where I wanted him inside of me. I felt so protected by my big, strong male. My Gabite, my Gin. My mate...

When we weren't mating, he would lead me around the base of Mt. Coronet and show me some of the good places to find berries and various herbs. He would always lead me around so boldly, like some sort of protector or guardian.

Everything seemed so perfect between us for the next few weeks. It was like living a dream.

He eventually put me in charge of bringing him food and doing more duties for him. Since he showed me where to go to find food, it wasn't an inconvenience to me and I quite enjoyed being helpful to him. He told me to cry out his name if I was in danger so he could come to my rescue. Thankfully I never had to do that.

A part of me really wished that he'd be a bit more appreciative of what I did for him, though. Despite the fact that I would always do things to try and make him happy, he never thanked me and it eventually grew to the point where I felt he only wanted more.

I couldn't complain. He was still my mate. He brought me so much joy and affection. I had to believe in him and I knew that he cared the same for me. I mean, after all, I was still a pretty quiet Clefable. Though I had opened up and talked a bit more than I used to, he was still the main talker of us, going on and on about whatever he felt the urge to talk about.

"I thought you just went out for berries," said Gin. It was just an ordinary morning, though I guess we were low on berries. "They'd still be here if you didn't have any last night. Because you just had to have them, didn't you, darling?"

"I- I'm sorry, Gin..."

"Well, what are you standing here apologizing to me for?! Go get me more!" He stomped his feet and directed his arms towards the entrance to the cave, clearly directing me out.

I nodded and walked out towards the entrance, carrying a basket the Gabite had taken from some humans awhile back. It was very convenient for toting berries into our home.

I knew that I wasn't the one that ate all of the berries last night... he was. He ate them after we mated. I had maybe one or two before he told me to stop and 'let your love have the rest.' Did he really mean it when he said he'd do the same for me?

Shaking my head, I continued out into the forest that he had shown me in the past. It was actually farther up the mountain than I used to scavenge around while on my own, not to mention further past the waterfall pond, but there were plenty of delicious berries and herbs up there that it made it particularly worth it.

It took about half an hour to get up there. When I arrived, I saw plenty of the Gabite's favorite berries growing up there. I started plucking them and adding them to my basket. It filled up rather quickly, I might add, but that was a good thing because Gin went through a lot of them.

After filling it up to the brim, I closed the lid and carried the heavy basket of Haban berries down the mountain and back towards the waterfall I knew as home.

Along the way, I spotted a pretty red flower sprouting up near the base of a tree. It definitely caught my eye, so I decided to check it out. It was very pretty. Maybe Gin would like it? I always wanted to give him something sweet to remind him how much I loved him. I'd try to do that every now and then, but every time it seemed to backfire somehow. But I hadn't tried a pretty red flower before... maybe he'd appreciate it?

I picked the flower and held it in front of me, looking at it with a smile on my face. My sweet Gin... maybe a flower would make you happy. Holding it up to my nose, I took a smell of it and found its scent to be quite delightful. It made me feel happy and all the more confident that he might like it.

Wielding the berry basket in one hand and the red flower in the other, I walked all the way back to the waterfall. When I finally I saw it, I protected the flower to keep it safe from the crashing water.

I got back inside to see Gin inside, stroking his member as he often did. I didn't mean to interrupt, but it looked like he was nearly done, so maybe it'd be alright.

"Took you long enough," he said with a grunt. "I was waiting and waiting! I couldn't take it anymore, so now I'm having to do it myself." He sounded rather upset with me for some reason.

I didn't take that long, did I? It must have been the flower I spent the time picking... that had to be it. "Um... I'm sorry." I set the basket filled with berries down near the entrance to the cave and walked over to the erect Gabite with the red flower held in my hands. "I- I brought you this... It's, um... it's pretty and smells ni-"

"I hate it." He interrupted me just to say that? No, not quite. "You took forever because you were picking stupid flowers?" The Gabite stood up and ripped the flower right out of my hands, then proceeded to pluck the petals right from it.

"I- I- I'm s-sorry...! I just t-thought you-... you'd like it..."

He threw the empty stem on the ground and looked at me with a very upset look on his face. "I hate flowers! I was waiting and waiting for you to get back so I could fuck you! And you go off picking stupid flowers when I'm sitting at home missing my mate?! Do you know how badly I'm dying for a fuck right now?!"

It wasn't clear to me when he started referring to our mating as 'fucking' - a rather disgusting term for it, in my opinion - but that was what I heard it as for at least the past while...

All I could do was just hang my head and sigh. "I'm s-sorry... G- Gin..."

He seemed especially angry today. The Gabite suddenly pushed me onto my back and stared down at me with his erection standing proudly in front of him. "Now let's get this over with and maybe I can forgive you."

It really hurt when he shoved me down onto the ground like that. It was no accident... he pushed me right down... on purpose.

Gin then got down on top of me and started humping against my leg and groin. He wasn't wasting any time...

It didn't take much longer than a few seconds for him to find my opening and penetrate me, causing me to tense up as he slid his member inside of me. He bucked his hips against mine in a rhythm, thrusting that piece of malehood in and out of me.

"Oh yes... just what I needed... uhnnn..."

I wasn't expecting him to do that, so I was still rather dry down there and it hurt a bit as he quickly stretched me out. I tried not to cry, though honestly the physical pain wasn't even close to the emotional pain I was feeling.

He was angry with me... I made him wait... all for a flower that he didn't care about. I let him down and disappointed him... of course he should be mad at me. I tried... but like I'd grown to see, no matter how hard I tried, it didn't seem like it made a difference.

Gin lifted me up from behind with his arms so my head was on the ground but my hips and girlhood were held in the air. He had complete control as he pulled my body up against his and thrust his own into mine while my rear was suspended a bit in the air.

I didn't say anything to Gin the whole time he mated with me. It wasn't even like he was mating me... but really just as he put it, 'fucking' me. It was just for him, just to pleasure him... I felt no pleasure or satisfaction from what he was doing and instead felt only increasing guilt as I continued beating myself up over the flower and being late for him.

Thankfully it wasn't more than a few minutes before the horny Gabite came inside of me, drenching my insides with his sticky hot semen. He made a powerful thrust into me as he came, holding me tightly against his body. I felt every drop of it drip all the way into my deepest depths, feeling like it was sliding down there in a very strange way due to the angle I was at.

After he finished his orgasm, he pulled himself out of me and let go of my underside, causing it to fall flat on the ground.

"Damn... I need some food." Without giving me another look, he brushed himself off and walked over to the basket of food I left over by the entrance.

That was it... he didn't even see if I was alright or if I enjoyed it. It felt like a piece of my heart was ripped out and smashed on the ground or something. He completely ignored me... he completely abused me only for his own needs...

But... then again... then again...

It was my fault...

-~ End of Chapter 7 ~-