Regret Comes in Waves
This was for a writing challenge in a Telegram group I joined (link here if you're interested: https://t.me/joinchat/CPoeZhclggenrOEh0yYwvg). In under a thousand words, we would write a short story fitting a chosen theme. This week's was 'seven seconds into regretting a decision'.
Hopefully, this story fits the premise and delivers in its message, because writing this makes me further appreciate most of the life choices I made. This includes finding the courage to be myself and eventually finding my loving partner. <3
Regret Comes in Waves
By Domus Vocis
The first wave of regret comes when you don't accept who you are.
You're a high school senior born into a lower-income family of wolves, but now you're confident in your future. All your life, your eyes wouldn't wander to the girls in class, or the sexy women in dirty magazines your friends occasionally traded to you. Be them she-wolves, vixens, does or female dogs, they never interested you. Instead of a chick's ass or luscious tits, you grew erect seeing a guy's flexing muscles.
After years of working hard in classes at school, sculpting your body for varsity football, and finding scholarships far and wide, you're excited to find an acceptance letter from your dream college. Your parents' smiles and your teachers' congratulations make your tail wag for university, and the possibility of dating made you listless for fall classes.
You attend a random party to celebrate the new year, and the new era to your life. As always, you try to keep your machismo façade with your teammates as they flirt with every chick attending. One of them, a she-wolf with a slender body and a high-achieving personality, wanted to get laid before going to her own dream college like you. A combination of drunken invincibility and your friends egging you to lose your virginity to the sexy she-wolf led you to joining her in an empty bedroom.
You pretend to enjoy it, imagining her lips as a male's as her hips that of a twink's instead. She buys it and slips her panties down to reveal her dripping slit. Although you'd been drinking that night and felt like you were on top of the world with an acceptance letter, part of you hesitates. You didn't want to sleep with this girl, but then you imagined enduring the rest of senior year with rumors of you being a fag.
Several seconds pass, and the thought scares you. With all your willpower, you bury your mostly-hardened member into her. The entire time, you imagine her pussy as a guy's clenching ass, and her moans belonging to the cute fox twink in Calculus.
The second wave comes two weeks after New Year's Eve.
She's pregnant with your cub.
In a flash, you feel yourself plummeting from the top of the world. You tell your disappointed parents a day later, but it's her stoutly religious parents who rain hellfire for what you did to their daughter. For weeks your life becomes a battlefield of emotions between two families, yours and hers, of what to do for the baby. She doesn't want to be a mother, but even thinking of adoption or the other taboo equaled disownment on a biblical scale.
Eventually, it's decided our graduation parties will also be a wedding. There were no other options where you had a choice in the matter.
The third wave comes when you throw away your acceptance letter.
College costs too much when you need to take care of a baby cub. Thankfully, your future father-in-law loans you the money. All you needed to do was attend church every single Sunday, name the baby after his father and love his daughter. Good-bye coming out while at university, and farewell to the promise you made to your teachers and parents.
The fourth wave comes when you say 'I do'.
Truth be told, you liked this she-wolf, and getting to know her more in the days leading up to the momentous day. Through the tears and arguments with her parents, there was this sweet nature and well-spoken intellect that made you wonder what her life would be like if it weren't for that fateful night. You both form a mutual friendship over the coming months, happily hold her paw during the monogram, and hoped something great would form from this union.
By the time the wedding comes, you're scared shitless. You follow the choreographed motions until the moment arrives when you're asked if you would take the beautifully dressed she-wolf as your wife until death. Hesitant and sweating all over, your eyes dart between your smiling parents and in-laws glaring toward you in the pews. You imagined leaving this life at the altar and starting anew in another town that doesn't know your name.
You almost did.
The following week, you're at a summer resort. While your pregnant wife is asleep in the honeymoon suite, you sneak out and pick up a male raccoon winking at you across the hotel bar. Ten minutes later, you're fucking his brains out in a deserted restroom. Your cock hardens with each thrust while his muffled moans bring you to your greatest orgasm.
The fifth wave is not getting his phone number.
The sixth wave comes after years of being unable to hit the gym.
To make money for your family, you accept a job working at the local car dealership. For nine hours every day, you sit in a cramped cubicle typing at a computer and eating fast food for lunch. What were once muscled abs became a beer belly. The chair hurts your back, and your boss (a friend of your father-in-law's) tries but fails being friendly whenever he drops new paperwork for you to complete by Friday. Soon you never have time off, and eventually lose contact with high school friends.
The seventh wave comes when you catch your wife having an affair, and you decide not to ask for a divorce. For both of you, this was the perfect chance to escape, but you couldn't with a mortgage and your teenage son attending junior high. You form a truce for now.
You drown yourself in alcohol after angrily driving off to a random bar. As you sit there in the bar stool, and see an overweight, middle-aged wolf stare back at you in a nearby mirror, does all seven waves of regret finally hit you all at once.
Without any regret that night, you cry for what you lost.