Shattered Freedom, Chapter One
#16 of Decision & Sacrifice
Previously in Decisions and Sacrifice........
"Never told anyone what happened to me....." Throttle's soft voice thick with sadness whispered. "It hurts to even think about it."
On his lap he held a stuffed bulldog in a leather jacket. Charley had bought it for him on one of her shopping trips. He played with the small soft ears.
"Guess the first time was the worst. Tossed down onto a bed, tied up and stripped by the crew. Then Mace showed up." Closing his pink eyes he rested his head against the toy. "Wasn't my first rape, but damn, after what that Plutarkian had done, Mace hurt."
Large black button eyes stared back at him unblinking, uncomprehending and uninterested.
"I guess it started when Vincent got hurt. Hurt bad. I ran out of options, I brought him to Karbunkle, traded myself for Vincents' safety. The freak helped Vinnie all right, guess that was my goal all along. Damn freak of a doctor, brought in a shape-shifting villain, blinded me, used me..... for some odd experiment to breed Mice and Rats. No idea if it worked, shouldn't have, hope it hadn't. I was shipped to Plutark, why? why not. Some unfortunate female rat I met was to be my mate. Never happened. I was brought to Lord Camembert himself.... sick son of a bitch. Damn.." Throttle's voice choked, he cleared his throat ignoring the tears trickling down his cheeks. "He used everything, a pole, an electrical cord, himself.... all to hear me scream. His plan was to tear me down, and behead me on national pay-per-view. Harley rescued me. That's when we were rescued...... in a fiery battle, in confusion I told Vincent not to turn around, we found ourselves at the feet of Mace. FUCK!" Throttle threw the stuffed toy across the room. The small toy didn't make a sound as it hit against the wall, slid down and flopped to the floor.
With an exaggerated sigh, Throttle stood up and retrieved the toy dog. Whipping it against his leg, he dusted it off. With a sigh he flopped back in the leather chair he'd grown fond of.
The nights seemed longer than before to the tan mouse who sat quietly in the living room of the Last Chance Garage. The rumble of the laundry machines, din of the fridge and whirr of the ceiling fan seemed to be the only noise.
"Somehow, Vincent and I were saved, brought back to Mars then sent here to recover." He finished telling the toy as the ceiling creaked.
Vinnie stood on the stairs, a smirk on his face. "Well, lest you're talking to someone."
Throttle didn't look up knowing his friend was only worried. "You locked up the weapons."
"Hey, it was either that or tell Charley why I wanted the knife drawer locked." Vinnie shrugged walking down the rest of the stairs. "I made your bed." Vinnie said. He studied his bro. The poor tawny mouse still wasn't eating enough. "You want to come back to bed?"
Throttle hung his head. "Not yet."
"Kay. I'll leave a light on so you don't trip again." Vinnie gave Throttle one last soulful glance before retreating back up stairs.
"Yeah, thanks." Throttle sighed. He looked at the stuff toy in his hands and frowned.
Biker Mice From Mars
In
** Shattered Freedom**
by** : Whipblade**
"Sweetheart!"Vinnie whined, only to receive a harsh look from his beloved mechanic. "The only reason you say you love him is because he's within earshot!" The white mouse accused the married human.
"Vinnie" Charley sighed yet again agitated at hisinability to accept her marriage.
Throttle rolled his eyes tired of hearing the same argument for the last two months. "Charley, why don't you take Vincent to Quigley field." He suggested thumbing towards the garage where Modo was. "Away from him."
Smiling at the tawnys' idea."That sounds great." She grabbed her white and purple helmet. "Come on Vinnie, I'll show you what happened to the field."
Vinnie watched her leave. "Bro?" he paused beside Throttle.
"You'll both be out of earshot Vincent. Listen to whatever she says. Get it through your head." He patted his bros arm. "Go on, she's waiting."
Frowning Vinnie left his bro, his awaiting bike and passenger made the white mouse nervous for once.
****************
The two pulled into the remains of Quiggly fields parking lot. "So this is the feild" Vinnie more stated as he stopped the bike, eyeing the large construction site. "Not much to see is there?"
"There's an artistic rendering of the new stadium over there." She pointed out. "But the electronic score board wont be able to hold anything but wires and a cat-walk."
"What about Stash?" Vinnie asked looking at the cartoony billboard. He remembered the old janitor that tended to Quiggly, even cleaning up messes he and his bros made. Calling them cockroaches and Fred the Mutant handsome.
"He died 19 months ago." Charley informed her Martian friend.
"oh." awkward silence befell them. Neither one wanting to start the conversation that needed to take place. With a heavy sigh, Vinnie stepped off his bike. Standing he took a deep breath and faced Charley. "Is there any chance for us? What we had been? Could of been?"
Charley reached out, taking a hold of his warm gloved hand. "Vinnie, you know I love and Married Modo. I still will always love you and Throttle, but only as brothers now. I'm sorry, but my heart and soul belongs to Modo forever."
Vinnie gently rubbed his thumb over her smooth hand. Lifting it to his mouth, he kissed her hand knowing this would be how close he'd ever get to tasting her. "Okay, sweetheart." he dropped her hand. Taking a breath he settled back onto his bike and started her up. "Family is important to Modo, and you." He fought to keep his voice steady. "You're good together."
"Vinnie?"Charley rested her hand on his shoulder.
"I'm okay sweetheart." He revved his bike heading to his new home, her home, but not theirs never their home.
****************
Time ticked on, Throttle once again disappeared upstairs to nap, leaving Modo alone in the living room.
Modo channel surfed, not really paying attention to the shows passing by on the screen. 'Baby-sit Throttle' he gave a snort. 'Why not, I got nothing better to do than watch my wife and bro ride off in the night like they got some secrete that I don't know about.' The big gray mouse irritated thought. He paused at a wrestling show for a minute. He started to flick again.
'Dunno what's worse, the thought of my wife riding with Vinnie, Or staying home with an adult mouse who is able to take care of 'imself.' Modo thought reclined in his soft lazy boy chair. He flicked the TV off, the living now reflected Modo's mood. Dark.
'Both Vinnie and Charley cater to his every need, even when he doesn't want anything. It's disgusting. The guy isn't blind, isn't broken. Yet they help make him something to eat. Hell they help him walk if he misplaces that damn cane I keep tripping over. He takes a shower every morning, changes his bedding and clothing. The only thing Vinnie lets the poor mouse do alone is that. Laundry.' Metal arm reached over and roughly grabbed the soda can beside his chair, crunching it slightly.'Throttle doesn't want anything to do with the Freedom Fighters, or his bike. He doesn't need a baby-sitter! He needs to be locked up in one of them insane asylums.' Modo chuckled to himself as he gulped down the last of the pop.
'What harm could leaving Throttle alone for a night do?'
His eye squinted in the darkness of the living room. The only light source being filtered through the curtain from outside.
"Damn it bros. Why won't you talk to me?"
Silence ticked on in reply.
"nnnahhhgggnnnn"
The big gray mouse looked towards the ceiling, his ears perked for any other sounds Throttle made. He took a quick glance at the clock. "Two hours asleep, betchya he's having another nightmare." Modo said aloud to no one but himself. 'My Dear ol' gray furred momma used ta warn me about that. '' Battles leave deep scars on the soul, sometimes a mouse can't get past a lost war, it'll consume them and haunt them. Don't let that be you Modo. I've seen it happen too many times. They're better off dead, most are. Just remember I love you, as does your family, bros and friends.....' Modo shifted pondering his momma's lost words. 'The difference between Vinnie, Throttle and I, was just that. I's still got family, Vinnie .... thought he had Charley and Throttle, has no one now.' Setting down the crushed can Modo didn't realized he crunched.
"Modo!!No!... not true... MODO!!" Throttle's pain filled cries erupted from upstairs.
Modo jumped to his feet. Running up the stairs he tore into the dark bedroom. Once the panic fell from his throat did the gray male breath. The window in the dark small bedroom was still closed, and the tawny mouse sprawled on the bed in the grip of another violent nightmare.
Throttle struggled in his bed, his sheets tangled around his neck and right arm. His tail flopped wildly as if anchored to an invisible footboard. He withered, whimpered and struggled as if confined to a small space.
"Modo.....not...no...." Throttles desperate cry escaped this clenched teeth.
Quietly Modo sat on the side of Throttles bed. "bro?"
Throttle whimpered. "no..."
Modo went to touch Throttle with his real hand but stopped short. "Bet your not going to react all that nicely." he said opting for his metal one.
Cool, not cold metal brushed Throttle's uneven forelock off his sweat soaked forehead. "mmm.." Throttle's hands clasped onto the metal so fast that Modo didn't have time to even flinch. "moe.....doe?" he squeaked softly.
"I'm here." Modo said squeezing Throttle's hand with his metal one.
"Modo?" Eyes fluttering open he saw the familiar face of his lost bro. "Modo?"
"I's me" Modo smiled running his real hand over Throttle's cheek. "I'm right here."
A deep blush crept up and consumed the tawnys' face.
"bro?" Modo sat up, his metal hand holding Throttles hands; he put his real hand on the blanket and froze. "oh."
Throttle looked away ashamed. "sorry.:"
Modo frowned. "Do this often?" He asked standing up slowly.
"Yeah."Throttle sat up wincing feeling the wet between his legs.
Modo reached down and lifted Throttle up like a baby.
"BRO!"Throttle squealed as he was carried to the bathroom and carefully placed into the bathtub, blankets and all.
"HEY!" Throttle laughed kicking his blankets off him.
Modo gathered the blankets and put them into the hamper. "Take your clothes off, bro. Their wet."
Throttle froze. "When you leave, I will."
"Bro, ah ain't letting you off tha hook that easy. Take 'em off."
Throttle sighed. Lifting his shirt over his head he paused before tossing it to the gray mouse.
Modo eyed the scars criss crossing Throttle's chest and back. The distorted remains of the tattoo.
Throttle turned his head as he awkwardly peeled out of his wet pants.
Modo just stared. Mouth agap and eye wide. "bro..." his voice a scarce whisper.
Throttle couldn't look at his bro, couldn't dream what was running through the gray mouse's mind. Feeling rejection, the tawny reached over to turn on the water. Just short of grabbing the hot water knob, Modo's hand took hold of the tan one. Throttle looked up to see Modo sitting down on the edge of the bathtub. His face wasn't screwed up in horror, or disgust. It was full of compassion, not pity.
"Guess we're more alike then ever before, eh bro?" Modo's sad voice quietly said.
"no..."
"We're scarred for life."
"not the same.." Throttle whispered his eyes landing on Modo's metal arm.
"No, no it's not." Modo agreed absently flexing his metal wrist. "but, the feelings are."
Throttle sighed, still not looking at his bro.
Capturing Throttle's chin with his metal hand Modo forced the tawny mouse to look at him. "Your still m'ah bro, Throttle."
Modo stood up, taking the laundry with him, he shut the bathroom door leaving Throttle to bathe.
Modo leaned against the bathroom door. Taking a deep breath he closed his eye trying to understand just what he saw. The .....the way Throttle.... He shook his head.'Someone is going to pay for what they did to my bros!' Remembering the wet laundry in his arms Modo continued down stairs.
' Nowonder your wetting the bed bro. Betchya anything you've been taking a bath at night and doing laundry to hide it. Primer did that when she was younger. Embarrassed that she wet the bed at age 7.
Man, I never seen any sheath so damaged before. few more cuts and they'd given you a free gender change.' Shaking his head Modo headed for the basement. 'Fuck, I didn't even notice your balls. Damnit! That ...." Modo dumped the laundry into the washer. Washing his hands in the sink he bit his bottom lip unable to think of any words that would express his anger.
Throttle stepped out of the bathroom just in time to hear cement crumble and Modo's loud curse. Tawny ears dropped dramatically, almost touching his shoulders. Carefully padding to his room, the one time leader of the Biker Mice huddled under Vinnie's blankets. 'Modo's been here the longest. They all expect me to be my old self again.... I just... I can't.' With a sigh, Throttle retrieved his stuffed dog. Rolling on his side, back to the wall, he closed his eyes in hope of a dreamless sleep, trying hard to ignore the sound of Vinnie's bike returning.
**************
Charley smiled at the lone mouse sitting by himself. He had his back to her, his head turned watching Vinnie and Modo playing street hockey outside.
"You look bored."
Throttle glanced over his shoulder to see the smiling human. "Naw, I'm fine."
"Right."She leaned a hip on the window ceil, arms crossed and that coy knowing smile on her face.
Throttle concentrated on the game outside. Not wanting to look at Charley-girl.
"How many times have you gotten dressed this week?" she asked, her voice holding a small tease.
"A few times."Throttle answered, his ears lowering slightly.
"And how many times have you lost your cane?"
"A few more."
"Have you stepped foot outside?"
"no." Throttle turned his head, studied her. "why?"
"You need a hobby." She stated uncrossing her arms. "And I need help in the garage."
The tawny mouse blinked uncertainly.
"Unless you want to hide upstairs for the rest of your life while I hire some low brow wrench jockey of unfit qualifications to work her, I suggest you get yourself dressed and in that garage in five minutes."
Throttle blinked weighting the threat. "And if I don't.... if I want to stay upstairs for the rest of my miserable life?"
"I'll hire Greasepit."
Throttle frowned. "You wouldn't dare."
She held out an oil-smeared poorly spelled resume'. "Wouldn't I?"
Swallowing hard, he stood. "Make it ten." he walked past her. Pausing uncertainly at the bottom of the stairs he saw her smile and wave the paper.
Charley giggled seeing the tawny mouse scoot.
*************************
To Be Continued
In Part 2
whipblade
September 28 2005