Hades and Philos: December
#5 of Hades and Philos
Hades learns of a plot to kidnap his beloved Queen.
My Queen's fourth month in Hades shifted between entwining together with me on our warm bed, performing our duties as God and Goddess of the Underworld, and lazily lounging about throughout our palace. All of it done together.
December gave way to the new year without much resistance, save for a stubborn mortal or two who could not comprehend the concept of death. However, their feeble attempts to leave were unmatched by Cerberus, who would pull them back if his growls did not scare the souls back. One foolish mortal, a Spartan tiger who managed to break the hind legs of one of my centaur guards before dodging the thrashing claws of a vicious Erinyes, only to be sideswiped by the mighty arms of my three-headed hellhound. He would have been thrown into the pit of Tartarus had the Spartan not offered to...please Cerberus in exchange for a lenient sentence.
I relented when the mutt wouldn't stop wagging his tail, since he rarely was given much pleasure outside guarding my realm and subjects. And such, after pulling the Spartan into the maze outside my palace, the howls that echoed throughout the Underworld did not only come from the three-headed gatekeeper. And by the time another centaur came to escort the Spartan tiger (lightly melancholy yet nevertheless very spent and sporting an erect phallus) into the entrance of the Asphodel Meadows, Philos and I could not help but notice the satisfied smirk etched across all three of Cerberus' muzzles.
"Thank you, my King and Queen," he panted, licking his muzzles without ceasing to bow for us. "It has been decades since I have been allowed to divulge myself in mortal pleasures..."
"How was it, Spots?" Philos giggled from his throne.
"Divine," he stood, "but I do wish for a more talented, eager partner..."
Fortunately, but not for me or my husband, he would be offered another chance to pleasure himself with another mortal. Or mortals, in the case of an incident that would occur two weeks later into January.
Philos and I remained in our throne room, reviewing the judgements made on where each soul would reside in the Underworld.
"Hades, my King!" An armored, female harpy flew in through the skylight, bowing to us both, "I have some disconcerting news! Two mortals have found their way across the River Styx. They secretly intend to abduct the Queen!"
The rest of the court gasped in immense alarm, while I silently roared and gripped the decorated armrest of my ebony throne, causing a few cracks to appear.
"Who?" Philos immediately asked her. "Who would dare to kidnap me?"
"King Pirithous of the Lapiths of Larissa," the harpy answered, "accompanied by his friend and the great hero, Theseus of Athens! I overheard this plot as I was patrolling the tunnels leading from the mortal world."
My eyes narrowed with disgust. "I will deal with this matter, my dear Philos."
Rising from my throne, the denizens of my court were quick to make way for my fuming presence. I strolled out the palace entrance, through the courtyard and to the stone-laden pathway leading to the diamond gates of my domain. I imagined the thousands of different tortures I could enact upon them, from having Furies eat them repeatedly before resurrecting them, to allowing the vilest of monsters of the depths of Tartarus to...
"You are not welcome here, mortals!" Cerberus barked on the other side. "Leave."
"Allow us passage, beast!"
"Do you not know who we are?"
"I know you are both still among the living, foolish mortals," my hellhound growled. "If you wish to be down here so badly, then simply die first." He darkly chuckled. "I can arrang--"
"There is no need to do that, Cerberus!" I commanded the gates to open, revealing two middle-aged mortals--a greying canine and still-muscular feline--standing at the front of the line of mortals still awaiting judgement. Through my roaring, hidden anger, I decided to feign ignorance. "Who are they?"
Aside from their polished, regal armor and brightened eyes, I could tell they were amongst the living by the smell of hubris. The feline, a bearded orange tiger carrying Thessalian traits in his stance, defensively gripped his sheathed sword at the sight of me. Meanwhile, the canine forced a smile on his muzzle when our eyes locked. I recognized that same smile from Zeus from the time Hera nearly caught him with Io.
"Lord Hades, I am Theseus of Athens," the dog introduced themselves, "And this is King Pirithous of the Lapiths. We have traveled so far because...we have gone on many adventures, but never seen the wonders of your domain."
Folly, to say the least. But I wanted to make their punishment all the worthwhile.
"Of course," I forced myself into mirroring their smiles. "You two must be tired, so why not we relax with dinner?"
"That...will not be necessary, my Lord..."
"But I insist, King Pirithous," I asserted to the feline. "I must follow the laws of hospitality, should I not?"
"...no," Theseus laughed nervously, "we would be honored, Lord Hades."
"Cerberus," I commanded my three-headed hellhound, "do stop by in half an hour. I have a token of appreciation I have yet to give you."
"Yes, King Hades!" he growled. "I will not be late!"
Like a good host, I led them through my palace courtyard to the grand dining hall. Philos remained in the throne room doing his duties, but I informed the servants to prepare a meal for the two mortals anyway. They did not eat any of the foods presented to them, fully aware doing so would make them bound to my domain and the dead, yet I indulged in pushing them further into my deadly grasp.
"Why do you not eat?" I toyed with them. "Are my cooks' skills not satisfactory for you?"
"I assure you your staff is excellent, L-Lord Hades..." Pirithous assured me. "I...I'm just savoring the smell before...before..."
"Your Highness," Theseus half-chuckled, interrupting his friend. "If I may be so bold to ask you, why do you not have a beard?"
I raised an eyebrow at the dog. "A beard?"
"Y-Yeah...you see," he explained, "on the mortal world, many statues and depictions of you have you with a beard similar to your brothers'."
"I do not see why you have come all this way to ask why I do not have a beard."
"No, no, that's not why we're here," Theseus waved his paws defensively.
I could not resist myself from smirking at the two clueless mortals.
"That is certainly true."
With a quick snap of my fingers, snakes erupted from their seats, startling the canine and feline as they tried to resist the coils wrapping around their limbs. Gripping horror and confusion replaced nervous confidence as the only sounds that then came from their maws...were screams of terror. If only my sculptors were talented enough to capture these few moments, and build statues of their frightened likenesses.
"W-What is the meaning of this, L-Lord Hades?!"
"H-Have we angered--"
" SILENCE!"
Theseus and Pirithous immediately snapped their muzzles shut, trembling in their seats with the exact fear I expected to find in those who decided to cross me, and pay the price.
My claws scraped the hard obsidian table between us as I walked to the other side. Our eyes did not depart.
"I am wholly aware of your plan to abduct my beloved Queen," my voice remained balanced in the storm of my emotions. Yet my tail arched high and fangs glistened in visible hatred. "The entire realm I rule has been aware ever since you loudly stepped foot into the tunnel.
Theseus tried to defend themselves. "W-Wait, we didn't--"
"--mean to? You did not want to?" I cackled in disbelief, further scaring the two mortals. "Oh, but you did. You, another one of Zeus' demigod bastards, intended to take Philos from here and force him to marry you."
"I...Wait..." Pirithous widened his eyes in a comically further manner. "Did you say 'he'? I...I thought that Philos was a daughter of Demeter!"
"He is," my eyes narrowed once more into the tiger's terrified, albeit confused orbs, "when it becomes spring. Since the Goddess of Fertility and the Harvest did not like having birthed a son, she raised him as if he were a girl."
"We had no idea Philos was male!" Pirithous blanched. "Gods, if-if I had known she was a he, then..."
Having stepped beside the tiger's chair, I coldly grasped his closed chin shut.
"You must be the ringleader of this abduction then," I seethed, turning to his canine companion in the other snake-infused dinner chair "If so, then why have you joined along on this foolish quest? The years have not been kind to you, have they not? Are you wishing to be among the dead already, Theseus of Athens?"
"I-I-I only..." the greying mutt muttered, "I only wanted to help...I only wanted to assist Pirithous in remarrying a daughter of the Olympians, I'm sorry!"
"Is it true?" I turned to the tiger. "Did you intend to force my Philos into marriage?"
"Yes, Your Lord!" Pirithous stammered, "But if I knew the crossdresser didn't have--"
" DO NOT INSULT MY HUSBAND, MORTAL."
Now permanently silenced by my baritone, the canine and feline stared at me as I stood between their chairs, gripping the top and petting the hissing stone snakes.
"Now," I growled lowly, "I believe you two are really here because you are both widowed and have the desperate need of a woman for release. Since you are in desperate need or release, I have found a satisfactory solution to solve this predicament you both have: you will indeed be punished, but the choice is yours on which to endure.
"You may already know of my nephew, Hephaestus. He is a masterful craftsman and forger. In fact, he personally designed a few instruments for me and my insatiable Queen. You are both sitting in them as of now, believe it or not. He calls them the 'Priapus Chairs'."
The tiger and dog jerked their necks up to me and then down to their chairs.
"Marvelous creations, really. You also must be aware of Priapus and his massive phallus, correct? Hephaestus built into the seat a contraption that erects a stone phallus into whoever is sitting in it, by the command of my voice no less...The nights and dinner spent with my Philos, toying each other...hah...the memories."
On cue, the doors into the great dinner hall swung open to reveal the mighty Cerberus, who stepped inside and bowed before us at the foot of the dinner table. "Master, I have arrived."
I grinned evilly. "Excellent. You may stand."
I glanced down at Theseus and Prithous to see them distracted by Cerberus. Particularly his sheathed manhood and grapefruit-sized testicles hanging proudly between his muscular legs. I had seen them plenty of times before, as had many mortals over the centuries who...couldn't help but marvel at my loyal hellhound's sexuality. No soul could resist a single gaze or dare miss a peek at such a sight of virility. Or masculine musk.
"Your other choice of punishment," I explained to them, "is to allow Cerberus the honor of deflowering your lips, and you worshipping him between his guarding shifts. What will it be then?"
Pirithous immediately replied, "P-Please...anything but these chairs..."
"Do you consent to this then?" I asked. "Do you consent to this as punishment for trying to abduct and harm my beautiful Queen? My Philos??"
"Y-Yes...I do..."
Part of me wondered if the mortal secretly yearned for this.
"And you, Theseus of Athens?"
"...I will take the chair over degrading myself for that...that monster!"
Cerberus growled and stepped toward the canine mortal, only for me to raise a paw.
"Stay." I told him, much to the hellhound's exasperation. "As you wish."
With another snap of my fingers, the dog's clothes suddenly vanished, and he hung his head back in a hitched cry of carnal discomfort. The mechanically built phallus slowly started to erect itself, pushing past Theseus' virginity in careful succession. I had been kind enough to have the phallus slickened with olive oil, not to mention have the phallus vibrate on its slowest setting, since I was unaware of his experience or lack thereof with the male gender, but there existed no other kindness. Soon enough it would go faster until the mortal could barely even remember such times he suffered a potent mixture of pleasure and pain.
Meanwhile, Cerberus had pulled Pirithous' chair from the dining room table and pushed his sheathed balls into the tiger's snout. He feebly squirmed for several seconds before succumbing to the musk of a thousand-year-old hellhound. I dare even say he eagerly licked and pressed his nose into the sheath, ignoring his friends' moaning cries nearby.
"Bring Theseus to a dungeon," I ordered Cerberus in my most satisfied of voices, "and do what you want with Pirithous. He is all yours for the foreseeable future."
"Thank you, my King! I am honored! Now, my toy, if you even dare to bite down, I will bite your head off," he snarled darkly at the tiger, "Over and over and over again. Now take a whiff. Understand?"
"Yes, sir..."
"Hehe, this is going to be fun..."
I turned my back to them and departed from the dining hall, joining Philos back in the throne room as he continued to watch over the sentencing of mortal souls. Hovering nearby was a mirror showing Cerberus drag the foolish mortals to their fates. The red deer smiled mischievously when I sat by his side, placing a sensual paw on mine.
"Spots will be very happy tonight," he giggled amusedly.
"As will you, my Philos," I affectionately nuzzled his chin, then huskily whispered in his hot, twitching ear, "And I intend to make you moan louder than they will. I promise you that."
"Oh, Hades~"