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An Annoyed Thaw

For Taiko

By Draconicon

"Alright, this should do the trick."

The polar bear thwacked the butt of his axe against the ice beneath his feet. When it didn't do more than splinter a bit at the surface, he knew that they had sufficient thickness to work with. He put it back over his shoulder, turning to face the mule -

"...Are you gonna get out of the boat or not?"

"There's a blanket on the boat," a muffled voice muttered from beneath said blanket.

"Yeah, but you gotta get out of there if we're gonna train."

"Why do we have to do this here?"

"Because it's better. You can't overheat."

"...The fact that you can use logic annoys me."

"Gotta have some muscles that ain't in the rest of the body. Now come on. Get out, or I'll tip ya out."

The grumbling voice from under the blanket finally ceased, and its source slid out. A blue and red mule managed to drag himself from the boat to the ice, shivering almost right at the start, and Olag chuckled a bit. He wasn't even in his usual loincloth, while the mule was in something that was halfway between a speedo and a jockstrap, nothing more, and barely keeping the shivers at bay.

"Wimp."

"Next time we'll do this in summer, on the beach, and we'll see how you like it."

"Hey, you said yes."

"I forgot how you like to 'train.'"

Olag shrugged. It wasn't his fault that Nor didn't like working in the cold, and he sure as hell hadn't expected the little guy to actually want to go along with his suggestion. He'd been extending that same training offer to everyone that he could, wanting a decent workout, and everyone else kept turning him down.

But hey, at least he got someone that he knew liked the forfeits of the fight.

The polar bear settled himself on the ice, stomping one foot down, then the other, embedding them in holes slightly over three inches deep in the ice. The mule groaned, shaking his head as he raised his fists. They were not that dissimilar in build, though the bear admitted that he had a bit more of a gut than the mule did. Then again, anyone that wasn't in the gym seven days a week had more of a gut than Nor. He smiled, cracking his knuckles as he clenched his hands into fists.

"You ready to fight?"

"I guess," Nor muttered. "How long until we get to the new stuff?"

"Eh, however long it takes us to get tired."

"...Please tell me you're joking. You know that takes forever."

"Yeah, for me, too."

"..."

"So." Olag chuckled. "Come at me, buddy."

"...Did I say how much I regret this?"

"Yep."

Then the bear was on the move. If the mule wasn't coming to him, then he was coming for the mule.

Forty-five minutes later, the pair of them split apart again, and Nor was actually panting. Panting hard, for that matter, and slowing down.

Heh, he ain't tired, either, the polar bear thought, rolling one arm around and around in its socket to limber up again. Cold's getting to him.

Not too surprising, really. Nor might have some mechanical parts, but that didn't mean that he was immune to the weather. Hell, the mule was probably more susceptible to the extremes than most people; all that resetting to make sure that he wasn't getting fucked over by the heat or the cold probably meant that he was draining his battery almost constantly. Made it that much easier to fight him this way, really. In a temperate climate, Olag was pretty sure that Nor would have been going just as strong as he had been at the start of the fight.

"Are we -"

"Nope!"

Olag threw a punch, and Nor dodged. It was more akin to falling out of the way, actually, which meant that the mule dropped right onto the bear's knee. As the mule went up, Olag caught his ankle and spun him around. He fully expected to get a kick in the face to slow him down, so when it didn't happen, he might have thrown his little buddy further than he had meant to.

The mule skidded across the ice, coming to a halt right at the edge. His face dropped over the side, hit the water, and then stayed there. By the time Olag rushed over to get him, Nor was struggling to pull himself free, and the bear needed to help him out.

What came up was a mule-head encased in a block of ice. Olag couldn't help but smirk. He held up a finger, then brought his head down, hard. The ice cracked at the point of impact, shattering to allow Nor's head free again. The mule gasped, and Olag chuckled.

"And you call me a blockhead."

"S-s-shut u-up..."

"Getting cold there?"

"What...w-wha-...what d-d-do yo-you think?"

"Heh, sounds like you need a warm-up, then..."

Which was the other reason that the bear had been sending out invitations to train with him. It was a common thing to have a little fun with one's work-out partners, and Olag hadn't had the chance to have anyone under him for a while. It wasn't that he went out to prey on other guys, but there was something all too fun about hitting the showers and having some fun after you were done training.

And he knew for a fact that Nor's ass felt amazing after a hard work-out.

"Come on, little buddy. Let's get to the -"

His hand was just starting to grip Nor's nearly-bare ass when the world flipped upside-down. Olag went spinning around, up became down and then up again, and he slammed belly-first into the ice, and this time, it was his head that went over the side, dunking into water that was freezing cold even for him.

That wouldn't have been so bad, but what happened afterward...

He jolted upright as he felt Nor's hands on his ass. They pulled back almost immediately, but the way that his cheeks came back together after having been obviously parted? Well, that was beyond new, particularly from his little buddy. He couldn't even see what was going on, considering his head was in the same sort of ice block that Nor's had been in a second ago.

For fuck's sake...

With a heave, Olag headbutted the ice shelf that they had been standing on, and the block shattered. He didn't gasp, considering that he hadn't been lacking in air, but he did slap his head a few times to get the icicles out of his ears.

"Ugh...fucking fuck...oh, FUCK that hurts..."

"..."

He turned around, looking the mule in the eye again. Nor looked...he didn't know how the other guy looked, if he was honest. Angry-sorry? Sorry-hateful? Hard to tell, really, but definitely not in a good mood. Olag sighed.

"Hit the showers?"

"If we can."

"Yeah. Just gotta swim back."

"WHAT?!"

"I'm kidding."

"...Better be..."

"'Sides, if it happened that way, I'd be the raft."

A half hour later, they were back on the Man in Red's ship. Nobody had stopped them on the way down to the showers, and the great hulk of metal bobbed up and down in its gradual way, another glacier on the frozen sea. The hot water was an obvious blessing to the mule sitting on the bench across from him, while Olag just tolerated the heat getting the ice crystals out of his fur.

He rolled his head to one side, then the other, cracking it as he shifted his dick from between his legs to over one thigh. The mule looked up from the floor, and Olag rolled his eyes.

"Alright, I guess it's my line."

"Huh?"

"You sure as shit ain't saying anything, so I'll start. Thanks for not fucking my ass out there."

"...How did you know I was -"

"Because that's how it works, right? Goes from training to 'training', and ya always start with the ass. Just...ain't me on the bottom."

"...You're welcome." Nor sighed. "Sorry. I just...it's been a week. A really long, really stupid week."

"Get that. More of the mind-fuckery?"

"Like you would not believe."

"Bad as the time that the boss tossed you into that weird-ass lab trying to figure out what real AI is like, where they put all those personalities in your head for a week?"

Nor blinked, his eyes going wide and his mouth hanging open. Olag rubbed the back of his head.

"Uh...yeah, forget I said that. Probably a biiiiit much for you right now."

"...Every time you say something, I wonder what happens whenever I hit my off switch."

"Hey, I didn't come up with that one...did enjoy it, though."

"...Can we move on to ass training before this gets more awkward?"

"Yeah, let's do that. Come here, buddy..."

The End

Summary: Olag and Nor head off somewhere cold for a training session, and Olag ends up getting a bit handsy. This, in turn, provokes a rather different response from Nor than usual.

Tags: M/M, android, Nor, mule, polar bear, Olag, ursine, naked, fight, fighting, humor, shower, character, playful,