FSE

Furry search engine

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Leo snapped awake. His eyes darted around the room, making sense of where he was. Couch, living room, dark out. Laying next to something fuzzy. And wet. Leo carefully shifted away from his makeshift pillow. His face was dabbed in a bit of wolficus drool, having been smushed up against her in his sleep.

The man shook his head and looked about some more. How did this…? Oh, right. He'd have to give her a stern talking to later. At least his muscles weren't sore from the awkward positioning. Missy, however, might not be so lucky. He looked at her. So you should probably put her in bed, right? Right. Fine.

Missy hardly stirred as he picked her up. Annoying how he had that power over him. His fault for reacting that way, though, right? An ear fluttered, as if she were listening in on his very thoughts.

Leo rounded Missy's doorway. “Y'know, I've always wanted to be treated like a princess," Missy said. Leo stopped. “Nice, beefy arms ya got there." She gave his biceps a squeeze.

“I could drop you, you know."

Missy kicked her legs and giggled. “You wouldn't!"

“You're right, I wouldn't. Might dent the floor."

“I shoulda just kept my mouth shut."

“You really should have." Leo took a few steps toward her bed. It took a fair amount of restraint not to simply toss her on there. Instead he placed her sitting down on its edge.

“Hey, that's not how you're suppose'ta do it. You have to lay me down." She swiveled on the spot and plopped back down onto the bed. “See?"

“Just go to bed, alright?"

“Already did."

“Then there's no harm in doing it again. Goodnight." Leo turned around and closed the door behind him. He headed straight for his room and lay down after tossing off his shirt and shorts. The odd sense of being well rested lingered in his body. This was going to be hard. Both admitting Missy gave him a good nap and going to sleep again.

_

“What do you mean I said yes?" Leo asked.

“Before you got all sleepy, you told me we could totally do it!"

“And that's all I agreed to?" Leo asked, setting down his fork.

Missy paused as she munched on a bit of bacon. “Well, yeah, that's all I asked you about."

“Do you have this in writing?"

“Don't say that. You already said you don't go back on your word, dude." Missy propped her head on a a hand. Leo didn't exactly recall when he said he wouldn't go back on his word, but he had to admit, that sounded like something he would say.

“Alright, fine, and say I did agree to a Halloween party. So what? That doesn't mean we'll be selected."

“Doesn't matter, I still wanna try!" Missy replied. She pointed to the living room behind him. “Look, can't you imagine all the fun decorations you could put up?" She gasped and began clapping frantically. “I forgot! We can carve pumpkins!"

“Easy. Slow down. Do you know how many people will be coming?"

“Like, twenty?"

“Or thirty, or more. People change plans all the time, you know."

“I can deal with thirty people."

“All of them at once? Talking? Maybe yelling? Along with music and a television?"

“Yeah dude, that's my jam. That's pretty much how it was with one of my old roomies."

“Yeah but that was however many years ago?"

“Over a hundred years ago, seeing as how I'm an ancient monstress."

“I'd hate to think how old I am then." Leo shook his head.

“Dunno. I bet you could convince a lotta people you were a monster too. I ain't sure you're not either. Guy lives in the middle of nowhere, stays at home, only goes to work, and walks around the empty woods." She paused. “Hey, you got a basement?"

“You want to see it?" Leo asked.

“No. No, thanks. I don't need to see any corpses today."

“Well, you were all excited for Halloween, so I thought, you know, it made sense." Leo shrugged.

“Stop, stop, I'm eating ya know. Don't need to ruin my appetite." She downed another slice of bacon. “But you don't actually have a basement, right?"

“No. I don't." Not that he'd have much use for it. Though it might've served as an amusing room for Missy.

“Let's get back on track here, then. You said we were gonna have the party."

“Fine, alright, I'll send in the request. That's all I can do."

“Really?!" Missy straightened up, then slouched again. “But we're gonna have to practice a lot. I mean, thirty people, yeah?" She turned her head as her eyes looked around. “That's a lotta people to impress. What are they gonna need? Do we have enough food? Enough space? Can they go outside? Should we sweep up?"

“Easy. We haven't even sent the thing off. You sound like it's going to be tomorrow." He raised a hand to calm her.

The woman eased back into her seat. “Who are we competing with? Maybe we can toilet paper the other houses. Egg 'em. Take out the competition."

“We are not doing that."

“C'mon, you said it was gonna be hard. I'm just asking for this one tiny thing." She pinched her fingers together as if that would really lessen the crime. “Oh! What if I scare them through their windows? It's Halloween!"

Leo perked up. “Do not do that," he said firmly. “You don't know what the hell they might try."

“Ah, yeah, OK, never mind."

Leo sighed. “Just think about what you always do, alright? I'll take care of the message. Why not work on your costume or something?"

“Yeah. Yeah!" Missy nodded. “OK, I'm gonna do that. But we gotta start getting the things we need. You know, drinks, food, movies, and music. Fruit punch? Or like, cups. Plastic cups! And skeletons, and spiders."

“Do you have a list?"

“I'll make one, don't you test me," Missy replied.

“Yeah, I want you to." That he could then sift through and pick out the logical choices. She won't miss the rest.

“Oh. Yeah, I'll do that. And stuff for my costume. Hmm, I'm thinking a lotta white and gold."

“That's not vague at all."

“Can't rush perfection. White fabric and gold jewelry. I mean, I would recommend real gold but fake is fine too. You know, if people want to think I'm lame."

“I think that's going to be the farthest thing from people's minds when they see you."

Missy tapped her fingers on the table. “Yeah, it's gonna be cool." Her eyes darted around again. “It's going to be really cool."

“You sure?" Leo asked, turning his head.

“Very cool."

_

Leo turned the bit of paper over in his hands, making sure there wasn't a stipulation for 'No overly frightening costumes.' Nothing like that. Missy herself wasn't really scary, though. As he read, he wondered if anyone would be allergic to wolficus fur. How would they explain that one?

The phone number stared back at him. Gave his word, right? To be honest, he vaguely recalled saying something like that, only he said it to a black blob and even then the 'yes' part of it was all he was sure of.

The man sat down on his bed and pulled out his phone, punching in the number quickly. Before he would send in any sort of mail, snail or electronically, he'd make damn sure he had everything. As far as he could tell, his humble abode fulfilled all of the requirements listed, but who knew what else they expected of a prospective home to file in a bunch of rowdy partygoers into.

With a tap, the line was ringing. Leo looked to his doorway to make sure there weren't any staring monsters. “Hello?" a feminine voice on the other side said.

“Hey, Ruth, it's me, Leo."

“Is this some kind of prank?"

“Uh, excuse me?"

“I'm joking, see, since you have never called me in the history of living here."

“Right, well." Leo rubbed his forehead. “Let me clarify, I have the paper and everything, I'm just calling about the details that aren't on the paper so I know whether to bother or not."

There was a long silence. “Are you sure this isn't a prank?"

“No. I just wanted to know what we would need if we were to host one."

“You know you have to mail in, right?" Ruth replied.

“I know I have to mail in."

“With photos."

“Yes, with photos."

“You could use the Facebook page too. I think people would like that. Maybe."

“I'll think about it." Not that he even remembered what any of his login information for that was. He had it written down somewhere.

“And the place requires appropriate facilities."

“I've lived here, haven't I?"

Another long pause. “Fair enough." There was a clatter of a keyboard. “I forgot how roomy your place is. Next to the lake too. You know, you're at risk of flooding if it rains bad."

“Is that really important right now?"

“No. I guess not. Not really the rainy season. We usually have a questionnaire for this kind of stuff in the first week so we can get back to you with specifics."

Missy poked her head around the corner with wide eyes. Leo shooed her off with a wave of the hand, and she promptly disappeared.

“Look, can I just get an idea of who will be coming, what we need, and when we can expect guests?" He inhaled. “And yes, I know some of it is already outlined on the paper."

“We'll have a registry of names, but it's usually in the thirty digits. You need at least three varieties of drink. Unless we change that, I guess. Oh, no orange. I'm allergic to that." Some more typing came. “Doesn't have to be a buffet of food but usually we get four kinds. Sometimes people bring their own."

“And anyone else's allergies?" Leo asked.

“Oh, um, dunno. Guess they just can't have whatever they're allergic to." Brilliant. “Though that'll be in the questionnaire." There was a long pause. “Should have appropriate amounts of candy. If you have any of those hard candies that taste like grape, those would be good. I like those."

“I'll be getting a lot if this goes through, I assure you. I'm sure my roommate wouldn't have it any other way."

“Roommate? You have someone else living there?" Ruth suddenly asked.

“Yes, is that a problem?"

“No, but you don't seem the roommate type. I guess rumors are better than I thought."

“Only good ones, I hope?" Leo asked. He put on a smile to force that cheeriness in his voice.

“Sure."

Leo's expression dropped. He picked up the piece of paper and scanned it. “I also noticed you don't have an end time for the party."

“That's up to you. Usually it would end at 12 in the morning, since that's when the place we use would close, but we can't do that now."

How the hell was he going to shuffle out over 30 people on the dot? Maybe a megaphone would suffice.

“Oh, yeah," Leo said, “what happened to the place anyways?"

“Some teens got in and graffitied the place. Then animals got in, I think. Also I thought I was coming down with something. Watery eyes. Scratchy throat. Sneezing. It was the worst."

“I can tell. Anything else I might need to know?"

“What are you going as?" Ruth asked.

Leo furrowed his brow. His brain stalled for a moment, figuring out how to deal with the out of left field question. “Haven't thought about it yet. Any suggestions?"

Some shuffling came from the other side. “He-man? I think that would fit."

Leo shook his head. “Thanks for the suggestion. I'll think about it. So that's it?"

“That's it."

“Alright then, well… Have yourself a good afternoon."

“You too, Leo. Call back if you need anything else. Uh, bye!" The line dropped.

What the hell was that? He placed his phone on the bed and stared at it for a moment. Leo hadn't spoken to her in a while, but he didn't expect anything like that.

Missy strolled in the second everything was silent. “You don't really look like a He-man, you know?" she said.

“I'm not sure whether or not I should take that as an insult. Weren't you supposed to keep shut on your eavesdropping?" Leo replied.

“Not when it's something this important! Plus, I saw your face, you looked like you were gonna die of embarrassment. I just had to listen." She laughed. “Who is that dork?" Missy crossed her eyes and put on a fairly close impression of Ruth. “You'd look great in He-man getup!"

“Ruth, daughter of the folks who showed me the place. Haven't spoken to her in a while but I don't remember her acting like that."

“And she's the one who's gonna judge us? I'm surprised she can get out of bed in the morning."

“You're one to speak," Leo replied.

“Hey! I get outta bed! I made you cereal a few times, remember?"

“And usually fell asleep right after."

“It still counts." She batted at the air.

“She's not going to be the only one judging, there are a few of them, I just know her the most."

“Obviously not anymore you don't. I will say she has good taste in candy, though."

“I don't know. Look, I talked to her, now we just have to send in photos."

“We can't just send in photos!" Missy walked over to the bed and plopped down. “Video, Leo, video! We live in the future! Do you think people just take photos and post them on the Internet?"

“Yes." Leo shrugged.

“OK, well, they do, but that's not the point. Point is, how are you gonna make this place look amazing with just photos?"

“Well taken photos? Good lighting? A stand? I think I might have one around here somewhere for my phone. You not being in the photos would help too."

“Hold on, you can't just do a phone video either. We're not cavemen, OK? We have better things. I'm thinking we get a camera. A real camera. That way I can make the perfect video for it. Then we'll win! Easy. Just leave it to me." She braced her hands on the bed and stood up.

Leo grabbed her hand before she could dash off and pulled her back. “You mean you want to buy something, right? Some really expensive camera? Just for this?"

“Well, it sounds bad when you put it like that, so don't say it like that." Missy rolled her eyes. “You could use it for other stuff too. Like when you go outside or something. Take video of nature or whatever it is you guys do."

Leo had to admit he was happy Missy was taking an interest in doing so well, but like most of her projects it was somewhat misguided. Especially in this instance when he was certain it was to fuel her ego to some degree. Well, it could be that she just wanted to meet people too. Was that so wrong?

“Alright," Leo said. Missy got that toothy, wild-eyed smile. “But same buying rules. You show me anything before you spend hard cash on it, got it?"

“Of course!" Missy leaned in and kissed him on the cheek. “You won't be disappointed!" With that, she rushed off out of sight.

Leo sighed and wiped his cheek on his shoulder. It might turn out alright. Gave him a chance to talk to people too. Hopefully not as awkwardly as with Ruth, though. She didn't have any siblings, right?

He looked to the doorway. Probably should make sure Missy didn't buy anything on impulse. Leo went after her.

_

Leo reflexively held his hand up. “You don't have to take a video now. There's still plenty of days left to submit."

“The sooner the better!" Missy said from behind her camera. “Don't be camerashy either. It pays to be confident."

“I'm confident in myself, just not confident you'll make me look good."

“Whatever, we can cut that." Missy turned the camera around to face her. “You hear that future me? Cut it out!"

“Maybe you should be a little louder so she can hear you from the past," Leo replied. He tucked in a chair and wiped down the table. The kitchen was always pristine, so at least that would take the least prepping.

“Right, anyways, this is the kitchen. Notice the large space and table for putting stuff out." Missy rounded the table, next to the sink and Leo. “Huge sink. Easy to wash stuff out. Leo is usually here cooking up something suuuuuper tasty." She practically shoved the camera in his face. “Isn't that right?"

“I certainly try." Leo tried to keep his face blank. He noticed she came close to reaching out and tapping him, just to annoy him no doubt, but refrained. Thank goodness.

Missy snapped away. “Big fridge, huge microwave oven, all these cabinets to hold stuff. Even if what we have isn't enough, we can always make more!" She stopped the video and lowered the camera. “I just thought'a something."

Leo crossed his arms. “What?"

“What are we, y'know, gonna tell people?"

“About?"

“You know." She pointed to him and then back at herself. “Wouldn't it be weird if we weren't at least like uh, an item? A thing?"

“We can't just be roommates?" He turned his head for emphasis. “You know, like we are?"

“But no way they're gonna think that. They're definitely gonna think we're fucking. No, it'd be weird. Either that or, y'know." Missy fiddled with the camera. “They'll think you're gay." She glanced up at him and then back down.

Leo's brow crinkled. “So what, you want me to start calling you sweetheart? Why do you care?" The thought swirled about in his head. He was above being concerned what other people thought of him, right? Well, office presentation would show otherwise. Plus, he didn't need any awkward confrontations with actually interested men. Not that he would tell Missy any of that.

“Duh, we're friends. I don't want my friends being misspoken about like that." She stifled a laugh. “Even if it is kinda funny. But no, really! It would be weird for me too to 'just be a roommate.' "

“I think people are gonna be too absorbed with your costume to worry about what you are, really."

“Yeaaaaah, I am very pretty." Missy nodded. “But I don't want any guys latching on me either, since it's me we're talking about. I'm gonna have like, ten guys watching me."

“You know you'll be in 'costume,' right?" Leo air quoted. “The normal person won't find your costume sexy."

“Well, I know you're not normal, so I'm sure there will be some other non-normies too!" She huffed. “Anyways, they'll fall in love with my personality. It's just logic. So it makes sense. We both don't need anyone looking at us, so we need to be off the table, right?"

“You're assuming a lot there. More than your usual a lot," Leo replied.

“It's called the scientific process."

“No, it isn't."

“Fine, an edu-ma-cated guess."

“Right, that's closer to the truth, especially with how you pronounced it." He moved over to the living room and glanced about for anything to fix.

“So we should be a couple. You know, to put off other people and so others don't–“

“I get it. What if I do want a girl from the party?" Leo shifted a pillow.

“Yeah? You want a girlfriend from these guys? That's why you haven't spent any time in the community, right? Duh. Silly me."

“Alright, fine. I suppose you have a point there." Not to mention it would legitimately be bad if Missy caught their eye. He didn't need someone coming over, leaving bad gifts, and generally prodding about Missy's existence. Anything like that would only be inviting the worst. No. It would just have to remain between him and her.

“Good." Missy raised her camera again and began filming the living room. “This is the living room area!" She did a large sweep across the room. “TV, sound system, large couch, and all this floorspace you've got to have all sorts of fun! Isn't that right, sweetheart?" Missy focused the camera on Leo.

Christ.

“Yeah. Can move the couch back and everything. Table has enough space for snacks."

Missy lowered the camera. “Awesome, that was perfect!"

“Don't push your luck."

“I'm not pushing anything. It's called acting," Missy said. “We've gotta sell the whole thing, otherwise no one's gonna buy it."

Leo rolled his eyes.

The wolficus was already back to filming. “You'll note the sound system has got a whole subwoofer and everything. It's not just a soundbar!" She leaned down to get a view of the black box. “Everyone in the forest is gonna hear this. Not that my precious lion ever uses it, but y'know."

Getting annoyed now would only lengthen the process and eat more time. “You use it all the time. Missy can attest to how incredibly loud it gets."

“Oh, it's great stuff. You can just toss whatever on the screen and it'll be atmospheric." The camera went down once again. “You think we should do our rooms?"

“You want a group of boring community managers to look into your room, be my guest."

“Eugh. No. Especially not that Ruth. I dunno but she creeps me out." Missy shrugged. “I guess that just leaves the outside and the bathroom. Oh, and I guess your little fun room?"

“I'd rather not anyone go in there but I guess if we need the space I can shift stuff."

“Awesome, thanks babe." She gave a thumbs up and a wink. That was going to get old real quick. “Bathroom it is." Camera right back up. “And this way we've got the one thing everybody at a party needs, the bathroom!"

Leo quickly moved into the bathroom and wordlessly shuffled in front of the mirror.

“Immaculate toilet cleaned by yours truly. Same with the tub. Any problems you've got, you can solve them here!" Missy said.

“When's the last time you did either of those things?" Leo asked.

“Hey, we can't have them think you do everything else around here. Would be weird if a girlfriend didn't do some things for her BF, right?"

“Somehow I don't think you would do anything for a boyfriend either."

“I know. I'm good as is, right?" She gave a stupid smile. “Oh, right." Missy turned the camera to herself. “Cut that too!" Without missing a beat, she slid into the entertainment room and ran her camera across everything. “This is mostly Leo's super manly man cave, but we can move stuff around just in case we need more space for all the monsters joining us! Isn't that right?"

“Sure thing, huggy bear," Leo replied.

Camera off. “OK, no, we're not doing that one." Missy squinted at him.

“It was your suggestion in the first place, I'm just acting."

“You're supposed to be a boyfriend, not a virgin." Missy batted at the air. “I'm definitely cutting that." Worth it. Missy moved back into the living room. “So as you can see. We're all ready for food, people, music, and games. Just think of the decorations too. Spider web across here." She swept the camera across the wall. “A skeleton over there." Pointed at the corner. “And a bunch of spiders and a scarecrow–“ she opened the door and ran out onto the porch “–out here! That's right, we have all this space for outdoor guests too!"

Leo figured that would be the end of it, that there wouldn't be any more of this. Missy shut the door behind her and focused back on the house. “And you know, not to brag or anything, but if you choose us, I'm gonna have one of the beeeeest costumes on display." Missy cleared her throat. “You know, I'm just in uni for special effects and whatever, and I just have the fanciest costume made out of hiiiiiiigh quaaaaaaality stuff." The camera whipped over to Leo. “And Leo helped, because he's the best boyfriend ever!"

“It took a lot of time, but I'm just glad it's over."

“Showing this off'll be the perfect end to my final project! So make sure you choose us for the party!" Missy waved him on.

“Yeah, definitely don't want to let that impressive work go to waste."

“Aaaaaaaand cut. Thank you boyfriend." Missy fist pumped as best she could. “We have this in the bag!"

“You're a university student now?"

“Yeah, special effects, you know, nothing fancy. Going for my masters, then my doctorate." Missy nodded from side to side. “Rough first year trying to find what I wanted to do, then got my head in the game. Met you at the local Starbucks in the library, we hit it off when I mentioned something about making stuff. Mmmmm, I'm thinking we've been together for at least a year or two but only just moved in the last few months."

Leo furrowed his brow. The rate at which she weaved her entire life history with little effort was worrying.

“That sound good?" Missy asked.

“That doesn't sound terrible, but what the hell am I doing at a college library? Especially one with a Starbucks?"

“What, you're too good for Starbucks?"

“I'd like to think I am, yes." Leo nodded.

“Maybe you wanted to get a doctorate or something and scoped the place out, I dunno. What is your degree in anyways?"

“It's–“

“Oh, I didn't even think about what college it is. I guess it doesn't matter."

“It'll be important. That's what everyone asks when you go to college. We have to get a story straight."

“Good point. Good point. I'll research the best. Upper middle class college. Nothing too fancy."

“You definitely strike me as an upper middle class kind of girl."

“That's definitely a compliment, thank you." Missy walked over to the computer and set the camera down next to it. “How about I'm your first girlfriend? That way nobody really gets any ideas."

“Are we getting married in a few months too?" Leo replied with a half smile.

“No, still hung up on parents with the fiance business. See, I'm in a struggle with my dad to get my grandma's ring. Heirloom and all. He's not too happy with you."

Leo blinked. He wanted to ask what was wrong with him of all people, but then he realized he'd be asking the opinion of someone who literally did not exist.

Missy continued, “I'm thinking I got my interest in college when I first saw–“

Leo placed a hand on Missy's shoulder and guided her over to the couch, sitting her down.

“Look," Leo said, “I'm part of this too. Can't just weave a tapestry of your own. It's a relationship, right?"

Missy shut her mouth and nodded. “A relationship, right." She stared over at the empty television. “Uh, yeah, so you were probably interested in your doctorate, but as we got together you wanted to help get me through college first."

“Right, that would ease costs more, and I'm not getting into any loans, even with my credit score. I could see getting an interest in a special effects girl. What were you working on at the time?"

“Puppets. Which is what lead into the magnum opus, which is moi, of course."

“You could definitely pass as an oversized Muppet. Could give any of them a run for their money."

“Now I know that one was a joke, but I love the Muppets, so joke's on you." She gently backhanded his chest. “I bet with gear as pretty as this, I could get any job I wanted in special effects. And you're there too, cheering me on."

“So what brought me over, then? Why would I kick up a conversation with a random person at a… library? Let's cut the Starbucks, OK?" At this point, Leo just wanted to see what else she might come up with next.

“C'mon, the obvious answer is that I'm pretty."

“OK, well, I don't know what the 'human' you looks like." Not that he really wanted to know either. “So pick something else."

“Alright, fine. I was working on a puppet, checking out how the uhmm… You know, robot muscles work?"

“Hydraulics?"

“Right, those, and you just thought it was so cool that you had to chat me up."

“I guess I could buy that. It would certainly turn my head if I saw someone in a library quietly fiddling with a fake creature. And I'm at the library because I was checking out the place, right?"

“Yeah, you know, library is where all the people who want to relax go because they can't go back to their dorms and smoke weed, or don't want to."

“That was definitely my experience with it, sure," Leo replied. Missy definitely would have been that kind of person. She didn't stink of the stuff, even when she first arrived, so there should be some benefit of the doubt given. “I imagine you must've had some terrible roommates then."

“Oh, don't get me started. Mathematician who thought she was better than everyone else, and a chemist who thought she was legitimately going to be cooking up drugs. Morons. But hey, that's life in the tough world of college, you know?"

“I don't think my actual roommates were that fleshed out. Are you sure you haven't met these people already?"

“And where would I have met them, huh?"

“What about your actual roommates? I'm sure they had a friend or two like that," Leo replied.

“Psh, no way. Not like I even saw their friends. Also probably too much to ask that they knew anybody in college."

“That's probably true. Cash and effort probably evaded them like the plague."

“That better not be a joke about me."

“I mean, it can be, if you want it to."

“No! We need more compliments. Like how about you thought it was love at first sight?" She snuggled up against his shoulder. “That'll get the crowd's heart."

“I know we're entertaining them, but they're not an audience," Leo replied. “Plus, I'm not sure either of us believes in love at first sight."

“Maybe you don't, but I do."

“No, you don't."

“Sure it can happen. Like, everyone ever has heard about love at first sight."

“Just because everyone has heard about it doesn't mean it's true."

“But it means there has to be lots of people who've gone through it," Missy said. “How come you don't believe in it?"

“Not saying you can't, but not knowing a person before you get intimate with them is one of the worst ideas on the planet. Imagine sticking your hand in the dumpster and expecting a gem."

“Hey, I know guys do that. Dumpster diving."

“Yeah, I do too. Then they wonder why their wife divorced them a year in."

“Harsh. Well, you can't divorce me at least. What would the neighbors think?"

“I'd rather not think about it." And hopefully they wouldn't either. Visiting neighbors was not unheard of, but it happened. Quite a few people might be wondering what she looks like 'under' there. “Probably going to have to say your 'costume' takes a few hours to put on, so they can't ask you to take it off or anything."

“Ooh, good point. Plus it makes me seem more hard working, I like it. Only such a wonderful boyfriend such as yourself would spend allllll those hours helping me with it." Missy patted his chest and gave it a gentle rub.

“Right. I guess we can say that part too."

Missy pulled back and squinted. “You think we should practice kissing?"

Leo furrowed his brow. “No. How would you even do that in a suit?"

“I use a very complex system of…"

“Hydraulics?"

“Yeah, and some pressure. Mwah." She kissed the air.

“I think that would have literally no other purpose other than to kiss people, and at that point it might as well be a fetish suit. Not a good look," Leo replied. Wasn't far off from the reality of her being a pervert.

“I guess you're right."

“Yeah, so none of that."

“I could at least give you one smooch, otherwise it'd be kinda weird. What guy doesn't kiss his girlfriend?" Missy asked.

“Alright, fine, just not that often. Might get weird if it was something you did constantly." Leo shrugged.

“I will scientifically concoct the optimal amount of kissing, don't you worry."

“Not sure that's possible."