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Chapter 12 - Everyone has a Struggle

After the admittedly fun evening with Tristan, I headed on back to the Arc. I was bouncing in my stride and hands in my pocket. I passed an alley and I saw Lucas come barreling out and almost slam into me. The wolf pup somehow found a way to stop on a dime.

"Woah!" he said, waving his arms dramatically to keep his balance. "Hola Simon!"

"Hey Lucas," I said and patted him on his back. "Glad you're working on your stopping."

"Honestly I considered tackling you, but I figure you'd have been a little angry if I did that."

"Only a little?"

Lucas grinned. "But I hadn't seen you in awhile and wanted to see what you were doing! Going to St. Andrews?"

"Back home to the Arc, actually," I said and began to walk, motioning with my head, "but you can come with me for a bit."

"Yes!" Lucas bounced on his feet and walked alongside me. He was doing that face again. I called it "the begging face." He didn't even have to say anything, but with his ears flat and his eyes wider than usual, he was asking for money. He was probably hungry.

I sighed and dug into my pocket and pulled out a dollar coin and put it in his waiting hand. The boy grinned and bit the coin comically and then put it in his pocket. "Thank you!"

"You seem to be in good spirits," I mused as we kept walking, though admittedly slower now that I had company.

"Mama said if I keep doing well with Tristan she may let me find work this spring. But I have to keep my scores up and not get caught doing bad things."

"Emphasis on the 'caught' part of that, eh?"

Lucas seemed a little surprised, for an instant, that I had caught what he thought was a loophole in his mother's logic. But he winked up at me. "You sure you're not a wolf? That's pretty sneaky for a fox."

"Boy," I laughed. "When I was your age I was doing this and then some back in London. I even begged for apples and swiped a few of them at times."

"So you're saying..."

"You ain't doing anything I haven't done before, pup." I ruffled the top of his head. "One day I'll tell you about my time as a kid in London."

"Was it tough?"

"It...at the time I didn't think so. It was all I knew. I woke up early with the other boys--"

"Others?"

"We were all part of a chimney sweep service. We would go up and down chimneys cleaning them for our Master Sweep. We all lived together in a large building. I guess I had something like 20 brothers at one time."

"That's a lot."

"It was why we were always hungry. Not 'cause our Master Sweep didn't feed us right, he did his best, but you have to make money stretch sometimes. So I worked from sun up to sun down and was filthy all the time. Tired too." I let my mind wander into my olden days, when I was surrounded by a whole different lot of folks. "But again, it was all I knew. Wasn't until I got older that I realized that it was almost a death sentence. Lots of boys I knew died doin' the work."

Lucas was about to ask something when we heard a raised voice ahead of us. We both pricked our ears and tilted our heads. "That's coming from the Arc," Lucas added.

We hurried down the sidewalk and stopped when the Arc came into view. In front of the building was an otter priest holding the Bible in his hand and speaking loudly to the small crowd of people who had gathered in front.

"...And sins have entered our fair city since its inception! God has warned his faithful and pure children of these trying times and asks us to remain vigilant in the face of blasphemy! Here! Right here! In our city is a den of evil and seduction..."

I quickly held onto the wolf pup's arm and gave it a light squeeze, which caused him to turn to me with a questioning look. "Lucas, go to St. Andrews."

"Huh? Why?"

"Just do it. Go inside and don't come out until someone tells you it's safe to go home, okay? Please just do this for me and I'll give you another dollar."

"O...Okay," Lucas said and I handed him the other coin. I motioned down the street. "And don't fib me. I'm serious."

Lucas was gone with a look over his shoulder. I didn't want him near this--this was potentially bad. The otter was getting louder.

"Sodom and Gammorah! What does the Book of our Lord say about such a wretched place? That it, a den of lust and carnal desire, would be raised to the ground and anyone who indulged such people were condemned to damnation! Here we have such a seed as in our histories past! Let us not tolerate these dens of degeneration. Let us stand pure and proud against the..."

I saw Oro step out of the building from the front entrance. Not once since I had met the man did he look as handsome as he did now. He was wearing a very conservative suit, edged in yellow as was his color. He stepped over to the Priest and spoke to him quietly. I couldn't hear so I tried pushing my way to the front.

"...Very well," the otter said with a firm voice. "We will leave, for now, but make no mistake, apostate, that you will be judged in due course."

It took a few minutes for the crowd to disperse and head on their own ways. By now Tin was standing outside with his powerful arms crossed. Oro looked tense but exhaled when the street cleared.

"Oro, what was that?" I asked as I approached the white wolf.

"He's Father Toddson. Comes around here now and then preaching the same thing. The crowds were always one or two people until recently. He had a lot more now."

"How'd you get him to leave like that?"

"Let's just say the good father doesn't always practice what he preaches," Oro said with a slight smile and then waved his hand dismissively. "But it is not an issue. He is just stirring the pot, probably for more donations to his church. No one was hurt."

"Yet," I heard Tin say with his deep voice. "This could get ugly."

"Let me worry about that, Quintin," Oro looked at the two of us. "Now come in. Bas is finished cooking and I know you'll love it."

---

I'm not a bad cook. Rut was not a terrible cook either. But Bas put us both to shame. The food in front of us was immaculate, beautiful, and delicious. I had never seen meat so juicy or tasted cabbage with such flavor. The food was immense and the young black cat was beaming from ear to ear. Miro was serving himself and said, "You're going to have to tell me what magic you use to make so much food out of nothing, Bas."

Ethan had made everyone drinks and was laying them out in front of us.

Tin was already eating, shoveling his food in that got a few looks. Ethan smiled sheepishly but it was Bas who looked incredibly happy. "You like it, Mr. Tin?"

"Mmnhmmf!" The tiger nodded with some noodles hanging out of his muzzle that he quickly slurped up. He chewed quickly and swallowed a bite that was almost too big to get down. "I used to think Simon was the best cook I ever knew but..."

"No no." I quickly waved my hand. "I'm hardly good. Rut was always leagues better, but this is like...my skill is someone standing on the ground level of a building and Bas is on the twentieth floor."

Bas chuckled, and a blush formed on his ears.

"You are very good, Bas," Ethan said as he sat down next to his young brother. "You know, we've talked about you becoming a chef."

"Y-Yeah but..."

Bas's voice trailed off as he fidgeted his hands. I turned to the gray cat, who looked solemnly at his food.

"Money is always a bit tight for us, even here," Ethan explained. "We can't really afford to send him to cooking school just yet."

"Plus he has some of our best clients," Miro said as he sipped some of his tea. "Not that we would force him to work, but right now he is getting a bonus so long as those clients are happy."

"Soon though," Ethan added. "Soon."

It was then that I noticed someone was absent. "Hey, where's Ciel?"

"He's in his room sleeping off a bug," the gray cat replied. "He's in a foul mood anyway."

"When isn't he?" If I could suck the words back in I would have.

That got a giggle from Bas. "He just hates missing work. He's fine, just some sniffles and a sore throat with a slight fever. We decided he'd be better off resting than working."

"That's no good, let me bring him his dinner."

Ethan and Bas looked at each other and then shrugged. "You sure?"

I rolled my eyes. "He's all bark and no bite."

The black cat gasped and said jokingly, "Don't let him hear you say that!"

I went to the kitchen where there was always leftovers. I grabbed a tray from a cupboard, poured some stew into a bowl and tea into a cup, then placed a few slices of bread on the side. I made sure everything looked neat and perfect since we all knew the white cat was very picky about everything.

I took the tray upstairs and went down the hall to Ciel's room. His door was just like everyone else's save a small bell hanging from the doorknob. I knocked on it with my foot.

"Go away," a voice said on the other side.

"Dinner time, Ciel."

"Go! Away!"

Scowling, I balanced the tray in one hand and turned the doorknob, then pushed my way inside. "Ciel, I swear to god you are a pain in my tail for no reason--"

My mouth hung open as Ciel stood there glaring at me. He was naked, holding a towel in front of him covering his groin and he was, without a doubt, one of the prettiest men I had ever seen in my life. And smelled nice, too. From the bottle of what appeared to be scented oil that he held in his hand, I guessed that he was rubbing it into his fur. I remembered him saying something like having a routine to keep himself looking his best all day, every day.

As a result of his routine, Ciel's creamy-white fur was immaculate, pristine and smooth, cut and trimmed to show off every line of his body in a way that made your eyes follow the curve of his body. He was also toned under his fur, muscles hidden by the way he brushed himself. He was gorgeous.

And he looked mighty pissed.

But he nevertheless paused to let me soak it in. He was beautiful and wanted to show it off...he seemed pleased with himself before he growled and jumped in bed and pulled his covers up into his lap. "You stupid fox! I said go away!" This was punctuated with a sneeze.

I shook my head a little bit and closed the door with my foot. I stepped in further and put the tray of food down on the nightstand near his bed. His room was beautiful -- nice rugs and draperies, incense burning and lantern flickering lights. He made this place his home and it showed. He also entertained clients here.

"You need to eat," I said calmly and smoothed my hands down on my pants. "Your brothers said you were sick."

"The snitches," Ciel said. "Telling Miro and Oro I'm sick. They told me to take the day off!"

"But you are sick," I frowned.

"Nothing I can't work through--"

And of course fate let him get into a sneezing fit. I frowned again and vanished from his bedroom. I came back with some pills in a glass bottle and put them on the tray. Ciel picked them up and turned them over in his hand. "What's this?"

"Something for your sneezing. It's supposed to help. Cinnamon and quinine tablets."

Ciel took the bottle and turned it over in his hand, scowling a little bit. "What, you're a doctor, too?"

I laughed and sat on the chair near his bed. "Hardly. I worked in a pharmacy in New York. I learned a thing or two about medicine there. These things work if you follow the instructions and drink water."

"Hm." He turned the box over in his hand. "You think if I take these I could be back on my feet tomorrow?"

"It's possible," I said. "But it's no big deal if you need to rest for a few days."

The white cat bristled and growled at me. "No big deal?! It's a HUGE DEAL!" He was shouting, trying not to sneeze by holding his muzzle. "If I didn't work, we'd STARVE, you idiot!"

My muzzle hung open and I listened to the voice in my head to not say something.

Ciel must have realized what he let slip out, for he blinked a few times, sank back down in his bed, and sighed. He then blew his nose. "Listen, Simon, I'm sorry. I need to get some rest."

"Um, no problem," I said with a soft tone in my voice. It was clear that I had been cowed but I didn't want to show it bothered me. I got up and left the bedroom with a frown.

Was Ciel working this hard because of his brothers?

Later that evening, I managed to find Ethan alone. He was done for the night working and came out of the bathroom in just a pair of trousers. He saw me and waved. I waved back and approached him.

"Let me guess," the handsome gray cat said as he crossed his arms over his chest, "Ciel said something that was mean but not entirely clear, right?"

"Well, I mean..."

Ethan waved a hand at me dismissively. "It's what he does. Of all three of us, he's the most sentimental and sometimes has trouble keeping his emotions at bay. But he also doesn't like being direct with his feelings, so things can come out all...jumbled and messy. What did he say?"

We went to Ethan's room, which was already cleaned up. It was warm and comfortable but it also didn't feel homey like Ciel's room. This felt like a place Ethan worked and did little else in. I told Ethan about what happened and the older cat sat on the edge of his bed.

"Ah, that does explain it."

"I'm guessing he's taking care of you two?" I said, knowing that I was asking a potentially sensitive topic that the cat wasn't comfortable discussing to an outsider like myself.

But Ethan didn't seem to mind all that much. The gray cat's blue eyes stared off into the distance as he explained.

"Not like he used to. We were all orphaned, Simon. Our parents died in a flood. All we had was each other, and Bas was frail back then. He used to need medicine just to breathe right, which was expensive. I remember Ma and Pa saying they weren't sure if he'd live to be ten. But as you know, of course he did.

"Anyway, after we were left to fend for ourselves, we came here to San Francisco. It wasn't exactly easy, but Ciel and I, we worked hard. We did odd jobs around the city, usually stuff that kids could do that adults couldn't. But none of us wanted a factory job because it was dangerous and we didn't know what would happen--kids go missing in factories all the time, you know? So we made ends meet that way even if we were hungry a lot.

"I was working construction back then. This city is always growing, so there are plenty of job openings for even an inexperienced lad like myself. But I was too inexperienced and... I ended up hurting my leg badly. Broke my hip. Almost had to have the whole leg taken off, the doctor said. He said it was lucky for me that things hadn't turned out differently.

"But even with my luck, I couldn't walk, let alone work, for a very long time. Ciel, he changed that day. He used to be a lot more relaxed and cheery--kinda like Bas is right now--but he just said he'd handle the money and went to work every day. And then, all of a sudden, he was coming home with enough money to not only feed us but also to get me proper treatment and Bas his medicine. Although we were still scraping by, he was making more money alone than he and I ever did together. He wouldn't tell me what was going on, either, but I could tell that he was doing his best not to show how much he was sacrificing for us. After all, I've known him all his life.

"I eventually found out, when I could walk with a crutch, where he was getting all that money. He was coming here, to the Arc, selling his service to clients. Miro and Oro, they told me later that they had found Ciel turning tricks a few blocks away. They knew how dangerous that was for a young guy like him, especially courting men, you know? So they started to let him work at the Arc. They took a portion of his wages, like they do now, but at least he was safe here. Miro and Oro don't let just anyone inside these doors, and they make sure that, if someone is hurt, they are seen to. But Ciel still had to keep an almost constant schedule to make ends meet for all three of us."

I was quiet the entire time as Ethan recounted his past. This was a lot to take in. Ciel was a lot more complex than I had initially given him credit for.

Ethan continued: "When I recovered from my injury, I got an offer to work here, too--apparently there's some demand for cats like us in this city. Ciel was mad at first, but Oro and Miro said we could move in here. And so we did. Bas is old enough now and knows what we were doing, so he was allowed to work too. Ciel always told him to turn down a possible mark if it's business hours. But one day, he didn't, and got a huge tip. Bas was so happy...and Ciel was so mad." The cat chuckled quietly.

"It still bothers him when he sees Bas doing this stuff. Says his little brother deserves something better, even if Bas likes the work. He wants to get Bas trained as a chef, and he's secretly saving his money for it. It's also why Ciel works so hard and has more clients than anyone else. He's trying to make it so that Bas can quit this job when he doesn't want to do it anymore and wants to move on to his next job--maybe as a chef. That's one of the reasons why Bas has a very flexible schedule compared to Ciel and I."

Ethan was about to continue when there was a knock on the door and in came Bas. The story ended there and we both switched over to other topics. We sat up that night and talked about the things we'd seen and done. Eventually Tin joined us, and we started playing cards in Ethan's room. Bas ended up sitting in Tin's lap, much to the tiger's embarrassment... and then pleasure. Bas clearly had a crush on Tin.

When we left Ethan's room and headed back to ours, I passed Ciel's door and saw the tray of food I had brought for him placed outside on the floor. His plate and bowl were clean. I also noticed that the box of pills was absent--he must've kept them. I told Tin to go without me and took the tray back to the kitchen. My thoughts returned to what Ethan told me as I washed the plate, bowl, and cup, then left them out on the counter to dry.

The cat brothers' story reminded me that even though a lot of people here in San Francisco are happy, they still have their own burdens and demons to deal with. I was lucky; mine existed as a physical person, and I had Avery--be it ghost or brain damage--help me let go of the pain I had been carrying around.

Not everyone had such opportunities, nor did they have such chances to heal so quickly. Ciel was carrying the weight of his brothers on his shoulders. I made it my mission to talk to Ciel again the next chance I got.

When I headed back to our room, I passed by Ciel's room again.

"Get well soon," I whispered at the closed door with the bell hanging from the doorknob.