FSE

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"Can't wait to see you tonight ;)"

"Should I pick up condoms on the way home?"

"Well, I was kind of thinking, tonight might be the night, you know?"

"Oh! Shoot, my bad.. haha"

Ried put the phone down on his work desk. It was strewn with a decade of responsibility. The curse of middle management in some nothing white collar job from out of college. Ried has almost no ambition to rise any higher than this. He meets his needs, he can handle the responsibilities, he likes his team. And for him, it's enough. And he's known that for a while.

His wristwatch alerted him that he needed to stand up and get some steps in. Prone to obey the AI collective that permeates technology these days, he complies. But it's hard to argue with results, he's down ten pounds ever since his darling wife, Esmeralda, suggested he take his health a bit more seriously. His mid thirties had come with all the shifts in metabolism and lowered energy, but at least his hairline still looks good. Ried thanked his genetics on that one.

Really though, the squirrel was simply quite plain and normal. Boring but content. In love with the simplicity of life and its certain future for him. He trekked towards the break room, time to refill his hydro flask. He's a bit behind on his water consumption today.

"Hey Ried, how about those numbers today?" Greg called his way from an adjoining office.

"They're looking pretty good today, Greg." Ried responded with a wave. Their tried and true dialogue to each other ever since Greg started just a few weeks ago.

The water cooler sat dispensing his refill of fluids while he looked out the window. He gazed at the conjoining office complex of non-descript buildings, clouds blocking out most of the light, bathing the world in neutral gray. Contemplating his normal life, one soon to change.

Izzy and he have been married for four years, together for seven. And from the get go, Izzy made it clear she wanted kids. Ried had been undecided. She admitted that it didn't need to happen immediately or anything and there were life goals she wanted to achieve beforehand. Ried accepted it. But four months ago, she finally acknowledged she's ready. She's been conducting her research, looking into her reproductive health, making preparations, giving Ried homework. And the more Ried learned, the more worried he's become. He's a simple man, go with the flow, take it as it comes and it will end up alright. This, though, having kids, being a father. It scared him.

"Something interesting out there, Ried?" The words pulled the squirrel out of the headspace he was in. Greg the arctic wolf, his coworker and friend.

"Oh, just thinking."

"Want to talk it out?" Ried considered. He wasn't one to share his thoughts, but then again he's never had a need to before. Greg sipped his mug of cream with some coffee.

"Izzy and I are talking about trying for a child."

"Mmm! Wow, that's awesome!"

"Yeah..." Ried responded demurely.

"Okay, not awesome. Do you want kids?" And that was question, what did Ried want? He hadn't thought about it and these past few months the more he learned the more uncertain he's become.

"Do you have kids, Greg?" The wolf took another sip of his coffee, ending with an ahhhh.

"Yep. Two bundles of joy." He pulled out his wallet with a snap, there in the center fold were three or so family pictures. Ried's eyes honed in on the first one. There were four of them. Greg, a vixen, and two pups. Ried guessed there was about a three year gap between the kids. They both had Greg's ears, tall and pert. One of them had their mother's lovely russet coat. All four smiling as they posed.

"They look lovely." Ried said.

"Yeah, they're my precious treasures. That's Gene and the other's Lily, and of course my wife, Sulaine."

"Hmmm." He looked back out the window.

"Come on, Ried. You can ask me anything. I'm sure you're anxious." Greg elbowed the squirrel in the arm.

"Were you worried? The first time?" His hesitation evident, but glad to have someone to talk to.

"Oh, absolutely!" Greg admitted. And that shocked Ried. Hadn't he just called them treasures.

"Wait, really!"

"Oh, yeah, Ried. I can imagine it's the same things you're going through right now. Fear, anxiety, worry, went through it all. Both times."

"Both, even?"

"Oh yeah. It's another life you're bringing into the world. God forbid you take that lightly. Sulaine and I, we had a lot of talks. Finance, savings, planning, there were lots of moments where I thought I wasn't ready."

"But you still went through with it? Why?"

"Cause Sulaine was there, she told me, I'd never forget it. She told me, 'I'll be there for you, and you'll be there for me. Together make up for the other. Or we'll fail spectacularly.' Hahahahaha." Greg's laugh resonated in the small break room. Ried sipped his water bottle to hide his own laugh. The wolf was certainly good for moral around the office. It also gave Ried a moment to think through his next question. Greg however continued on.

"Yeah, Sulaine. What a woman, I could never do it without her. Cause, you know Ried, we have failed. More than once, not terribly, but you know..." Ried glanced his way and noticed his thousand yard stare. Off into parts unknown. "But," he continued, "we learned, we got better, we adapted. We failed better and better, and now I couldn't imagine a life without my family. They are my treasures." Greg fondly smiled towards Ried.

"So.. you never.. regretted it?"

"Ah, well. There are bad days, don't get me wrong. But they don't last, and I wouldn't give up the great days to just never have the bad ones. My children taught me to be a better man, so in the end, no, Ried, I've never regretted it."

"I see." Ried looked out the window. Silence passed along with the ambient noise of a working office. Telephone calls and printers humming.

"What has you worried the most then?" Greg asked, turning to pour himself another mug of liquid caffeine.

'Oh, lots of things have me worried.' Ried responded internally, a great many things. As he flew along the strands of wild thoughts that ensnared his head though, he thought he found the root of it. More than the money, more than the sleepless nights tending to an infant, more than the stress, the exhaustion, the frustration. It was fear, a simple fear.

"I don't know if I'd make a good father."

"Hmm. Yep, been there."

"I don't think they'd like me. I'm... boring."

"Hahahahahahaha..." Greg belted out a belly shaking laugh. Ried didn't enjoy being laughed at, he sipped his water bottle and stared off to the side, smothering his irritation. "And what's wrong with being boring?" He asked between smaller fits.

Ried blinked, "Well, I don't do anything remotely cool. My definition of a good time is reading through a, a, a new paperback in bed. I play Solitaire with real cards. I play the clarinet in a community band. I'm not interesting, at all. I'm just worried that a kid won't like me."

"Hehehehehehe." Greg continued to chuckle, "None of that sounds terrible, Ried. Actually, that all sounds lovely."

"Lovely, really Greg?" He let his displeasure show on his face.

"Hey, man. Just cause it isn't my idea of a wild lifestyle doesn't mean there's anything wrong with it. And least of all does it mean you won't make a good dad."

Ried sipped water.

"Ried, your children won't care nearly as much as you think they will. And in fact, they just might learn to love playing Solitaire and reading because their cool dad does it!" Greg nudged the squirrel with his elbow again. Ried whipped his tail in mild annoyance. This conversation was not going the way he had envisioned.

"I don't know, Greg."

"Well, I can't tell you what the right answer is. Not with something like this. But Ried, I don't think you should make a decision based on what ifs. There's too many of those to get anything done. And speaking of getting anything done, those numbers won't crunch themselves. I got to get back to it."

"Yeah, same."

"Ried, you're a fine person. I don't doubt that you could make a fine father, but whatever you choose, that's the right answer."

"Thanks." He responded without turning from the window. Contemplating the plain office buildings across the way for another minute, sipping away on his water.

......

Ried did a lot of thinking on the train ride home. More than he's done in a while, in four years to be exact, not since he proposed to his soulsquirrel. To the wonderful Esmeralda. Those were the days, being together, facing the world, finding their path. But when it came to proposing, Ried found himself alone, struggling to get through it. There had been so many what ifs back then too.

But four years of amazing memories came from that day. 'Kinda like Greg said, I wouldn't give up four years of amazing times because of a handful of bad days and some stress.'

But with a kid, there was less room for error it seemed.

'Do I want a kid? If it goes perfect, would I want a child?' Traffic signs and cars buzzed by as the train trudged along, each one ferrying someone home. Some home to their families.

Family, it had a lot of weight to the squirrel. A word denser than steel. He had lost his parents young and his grandpa soon after graduating highschool. Since then he's been alone, till Izzy. It was more than a struggle to finally accept someone enough to bring him and her together. But again, Ried acknowledged that there was no other decision in his life he regretted less. Izzy and he were made for each other. And Izzy wants kids. And more so, wants kids with him. That thought had mass, had weight that grounded him. In the sea of swimming cars and drowning fears, it was his lifeboat.

'Even if it isn't perfect, and it won't be, do I want a child?' he asked his reflection in the window. It didn't answer but didn't shy away from the question either.

'For all the possible ups and downs, do I want a family? A family with Izzy?'

Sunset rays and golden clouds filled the sky, giving the soon to be dusk sky the most wonderful halo. Tantalizing oranges and yellows painted with giant brushstrokes. It was beautiful, a beauty that Ried loved to enjoy on his commutes home, it always prepared him for the beauty that was Esmerelda. It always gave him peace.

'What would Izzy say if I didn't want kids?' he pondered. Not long though, the answer was easy to determine. 'She'd look at me, smile, nod, and say okay. She'd understand. And I'd feel terrible.' It really soured the view for him. 'Cause I want her to be happy, I want to give her everything. Just like she's given me.'

This of course came to the inevitable final question.

'Does giving her everything include kids?'

His reflection smiled back at him, clearly certain of something.

'Yeah, I think it does. For Izzy, I'd become the best father possible. I'd love for her to be the mother of my children.'

'I'm going to be a father.' He thought with a smile.

'I'm going to be a father!' He thought with a frown. Clearly, he's still got some acceptance to go through, but at least he's made up his mind.

......

The house was dark as Ried entered, devoid of the wonderful presence of his wife.

"Izzy, you home?" he called, there was no response. Curious, he flicked the lightswitch, eager to cast light into their abode. Instead of the corner lamp igniting to life, a row of twinkle lights flashed into view. Ried recognized them, they were the ones they put around Christmas time. They led down the hall, away from where he stood, turning at the corner. Ried smiled to himself. Clearly it's a trail. And he had an idea of what he'd find at the end. The game was already underway it seemed.

The squirrel was known to enjoy a game every once in a while. He kicked his shoes to the side along with his bag, stripping down all that normal attire he wore for work. Slowly his natural form peaked out. Short auburn fur, his slacks pulled at his tail as he slid them off, belt and all. He left his briefs, to hide his goods as it were.

The tile was cool to his toes, his shadow whipped across the walls, he was ready.

Esmeralda lounged as a queen along her throne, lazy and regal at the same time. She laid across her side, form thinly veiled by lingerie he hadn't seen before. He regarded her, the most beautiful woman in the world, and she was sitting right here in his bed. Their bed.

She was lit from a collection of warm light, the strands of bulbs placed in the edges of the room to give every furniture a yellow glow.

"Hello, handsome."

"Hey, beautiful."

"Like the dress?" He did, but couldn't pass up the opportunity.

"Looks wonderful, however," he crossed over carefully treading over glass bulbs, "it'd look a lot better on the floor."

"Ohh, well then" She was close enough to grab. So he did. Stroking her shoulder and upper arms.

Their lips met, snouts coming close, he picked up the diffusing smell of perfume, lavender.

He rolled up on to the bed, rolled her beneath him, felt down her sides. She felt so soft, so smooth.

She ran her hands through his hair, played with his ears. Pulling him deeper into their kiss. And he loved it.

He broke away so he could look at her again, the woman that lit up his world, gave it beauty, gave him joy. She looked so happy.

"Ried, have I told you you're an amazing kisser lately?" Her dark eyes reflected the lights of countless bulbs.

"Not since we kissed last." He answered honestly. Her laugh was like tiny wind chimes.

"Well it remains true."

"Happy to hear it."

"Are you ready, for this I mean?" She asked, he felt the breadth of the inquiry. It almost made him balk, almost.

"Izzy, let's have a baby together." It was the first time he said those words aloud. He didn't miss the way she seemed to light up even more.

"I've never wanted you more than right now."

He laughed as he pulled her panties down to her ankles, feeling up her legs as he went.

"Me neither." Her lower lips were flushed and slightly damp. The aroma of her scent mingled with the smells in the air, Ried's nose and ears twitched in his own arousal, the telltale tingling between his legs told him that. He nestled his way to her honey, huffing the air like he was getting high off the smell. And in a way he was, she smelled so intoxicating.

The first lick was soft, a tease along the right outer lip, combing through her pubic hair. The second pressed the left to the side, digging in just a bit. The third was preceded by a kiss. Izzy hummed in pleasure, that always encouraged him. He tries very hard to please her however he can.

He became more bold and adventurous. Tongue lapping at her flesh, tasting her, bordering on worshiping her. His intrepid tongue dove in, the bitter organic taste of her walls became his world. He felt the walls roll as he ate her out, loosening up and becoming wet with saliva and natural lubrication. Izzy's hips rolled. Eager to feel him even more and more. He was quick to comply.

"Ried. Oh, Ried. Yes, yes." Her words were a sweet symphony, and the two squirrels were no strangers to this dance. He knew the steps, up top, down low, sweeping the right, poking the left. Kissing her clit, rubbing her thighs, flexing his dick in his underwear.

"Oh, Ried. Please, I need you. Now." He paused to look up at her. She was panting, biting her hand, struggling to maintain composure. Her ears whipped with frustration, the male found it quite cute.

"Gladly, my Izzy." His underwear was discarded quickly, he prowled up the bed, eyes locked on his mate, focused on the way her eyes traced his journey. Until finally, they laid eye to eye, heart to heart. She was ready, so was he.

He aligned his member with her moist vent. Before doing the gentlemanly thing and giving her one last look, his need plastered on his face. Her need plastered on hers.

Words passed wordlessly, but he felt the need to ask.

"Are you ready?"

"Let's have a baby..."

He smiled sweetly, "Let's have a baby."

He pushed in. Warm, wet walls met his sensitive shaft. Izzy moaned as he speared her. He groaned into her ear as their hips met. It was hot to the touch, it was hot everywhere.

In and out, in and out. Slow, long, deliberate. All the way in, all the way out. Their chests grinded against each other, she felt amazing. On his dick, on his arms, in his hands, around his back as she pulled him close. He had to close his eyes, the sights around him were too distracting as he focused on her breath, her grips in the fur on his back, her moans into his ear.

She began cooing at him.

"Yes, Ried, right there."

"Ahh, yes. Yes."

"Oh, oh, Ried."

"God, yes. Ried!"

He loved that the most, the praise that he was doing a good job. That he was making her feel good. It made him feel good. His thrusts sped up.

Their thighs thumps against each other adding percussion to the melody of her moans. He hissed through his teeth as he struggled to keep it together. A losing battle with a worthy opponent.

"Izzy..."

"Yes, yes, yes! Do it. Give me it all!" She knew him just as well as he knew her.

"Here it comes."

A final thrust, hips locked together, uncontrollable spasms shooting his seed deep in her. She was quivering too. He dug his arms deep under her, pulling her close to. Pulling them together as their two lives became one.

"Fuck.." Izzy moaned.

Ried felt a moment of reconsideration as his orgasm waned. Only a moment however. It passed as soon as he felt the kisses on his cheek. A reminder that he wasn't alone. That he had someone with him the whole time.

"Another round?" She whispered into his ear.

"Anything for you."