Alone At Last
"Get down here and help us load the car."
"I don't wanna."
"Now, Dylan."
Groaning, Dylan made his way downstairs, as slow as humanely possible. "I'm busy. I don't see why I have to help. I'm not even going on this trip."
"Because I said so. What are you so 'busy' with anyway?"
"Stuff."
"Watching porn again?"
"Maybe."
"There's a time a place, son. Now help your mother with her bags."
Mumbling under his breath, Dylan hiked to his mother's room. She was the last person he wanted to help. Her bags were bound to be overstuffed.
"Oh Dylan, you're here. I'm almost done packing, can you get my bags?"
As Dylan expected, she had three bags, all bloated, no doubt stuffed with enough outfits to clothe a family for months. He didn't complain as he carried the bag to the car. The faster he finished, the faster she would be gone. Two weeks, all to himself. That thought alone put him in double time.
As Dylan threw the last of the bags into the car, his sister emerged from the house, there to annoy him one last time. "Unlike mom, I'm glad you're not going on this trip. I can finally get some peace and quiet."
"Yeah, well you're ugly. And I hope you don't mean that literally. If so, good luck on the twenty-three hour trip with dad snoring and mom talking on the phone constantly."
"A small price to pay to get away from you. Don't wreck the house while we're gone."
"Relax. It's not like I'm going to throw a party, invite all my friends, and have them take a piss on your bed or anything."
"Very funny."
Dylan's mom and dad appeared moments later, ready to head out. Dylan's dad and sister hopped in the car, but Dylan's mom had to try one last time. "Are you sure you don't want to go? There's still time. We can wait for you to pack."
"I'm completely sure. You don't have to worry about me."
"But we'll miss your eighteenth birthday. We wont even be able to get you a present. We could hold off for a few more days if you really wanted."
"Really, it's fine. Just think of these two weeks alone as my present."
"Are you absolutely sure?"
"Yes."
Even Dylan's dad was starting to get annoyed. "Sharon, just get in the car. You're not going to change his mind."
"Oh alright. Come here." Sharon gave him one last kiss on the forehead before going to the car. "Be a good boy."
"I'm seventeen."
"You're still my little boy. Be safe, and stay off that porn channel. It'll rot your brain. I set the parental controls just in case."
That would have been a problem had Dylan's dad not given him the parental code months ago as an early birthday present. Of course neither of them would tell Sharon.
Dylan smiled and waved as his family pulled out of the driveway. As they drove farther and farther down the road, Dylan's smile grew. When they passed over the horizon, he finally let it out. "Yes! YES!"
The neighbors looked on in concern as he screamed into the air, but Dylan couldn't care less. He was alone at last. As quickly as he could, he ran back inside and plopped onto the couch. "Finally. Two weeks, summer break. Hell yes."
As he prepared to rot his brain for two weeks straight, the house's other inhabitants plotted, neither of the approving of Dylan's choice to stay.
"Damn, we were so close to having the house to ourselves. That little, lazy, good-for-nothing...man!" The grumpig fumed as she stomped across the room.
"Relax, Sasha. Just because he's here, doesn't mean we can't have fun."
Nancy's suggestive tone always made Sasha excited. "I love it when you use the naughty voice."
"We'll have plenty of time later. For now, try and keep your pants on."
"Oh I can guarantee if I even wore pants, they wouldn't be on now. You, on the other hand, I'd love to get you out of that sexy little hitmonchan skirt."
Nancy couldn't help but chuckle. It was always amusing how straightforward Sasha could be. But she couldn't blame her this time. Nancy herself nearly screamed once she heard about the family vacation. With them gone, Nancy and Sasha could have their fun anywhere, anytime, and worry about cleanup later. But Dylan, in all of his ungrateful laziness, decided he didn't want to go on the trip. Though he messed things up a bit, it didn't ruin the girl's plans entirely. They would find a way. They always found a way.
"Nancy, where do we do it first? The bathroom, the backyard, or right here in Max and Sharon's room?"
"Try not to think about it. You know what happens when you get too excited."
"I can't help it when you're sitting there looking all hot and sexy."
"You see? It's happening already."
"With your legs spread all wide and your skirt riding high and your-"
Nancy sighed. It was going to be a rough three weeks.
"Where are you, man? Sounds like construction going on, or are you just hyperventilating into the phone... doesn't matter, they're gone... yeah about three weeks, some stupid vacation...yep, completely alone, well except for the pokemon, but they're nothing to worry about...yeah but...yeah, I know but...no, that's a stupid idea. I thought about it though...this ain't a movie, I'm not doing that. You guys can come but only 'cause my mom knows you wont make a mess...no, not even if you brought Kaley, and her lesbian sister...yeah, two days. See you then."
Dylan smiled as he tossed his phone to his bed. "This is going to kick ahhhh!" He was forced to cut himself short as someone spun his chair in circles. He yelled as it spun faster and faster. The only things he could make out were a big blotch of brown and purple as well as a smaller purple blur. After a minute's worth of spinning, he began to feel sick, but before it became unbearable, it suddenly stopped. Once the world, and Dylan's head, stopped spinning, Dylan's eyes settled on the chair-spinning culprit. He knew that brown and purple blotch looked familiar.
"Get out of my room, Nancy!"
"Oh come on." A familiar - yet annoying - voice echoed through Dylan's mind. "We just want to hang out." Nancy stepped to the side as the voice's owner hopped into Dylan's lap.
"No, Sasha. I have friends to hang out with."
"Well can't we tag along too? We can be loads of fun, can't we Nancy?" Nancy smiled and nodded, knowing Dylan wouldn't pick up on the implications.
"I don't care, now get out of here." He dropped Sasha on the floor and went to spin back around, but Nancy's glove held his chair in place. Sasha jumped back up moments later.
"Come on, Dylan. Please?"
"No."
"Please?"
"No!"
"Nancy could teach your friends how to box!"
"I said-" A knock at the door cut the conversation short. "Off." Dropping Sasha on her hind end, Dylan left to answer the door.
"I don't think it's working, Nancy."
"Keep at it, it will."
Dylan wasn't surprised to find one of his friends at the door. "Dylan, what's this I hear about you having a party?"
"I'm not having a party, Reed. Did Dave tell you that?"
"Yes he did, and why aren't you having a party?! Come on man, this is perfect, just like in the friggin' movies. Your parents are gone, you got the house to yourself for two weeks, you need to have a party!"
"It ain't happening."
"But the food, the women, the dancing, the women, the other women! I have a friend with a smoking hot lopunny he could bring."
"That's sick, and you're a sick bastard for suggesting it, you and your friend. You know how I feel about that."
"It's not sick, its hot as hell. You haven't lived until you seen a guy plug a gardevoir in the ass."
"Just stop, you're making me want to puke."
"Yeah, alright fine, no pokemon sex, but still, the party!"
"No. Everyone will come in, have a good time, wreck everything, and I'm left with the..." All of a sudden, something felt off. Dylan wasn't sure what it was, until he turned around. Sasha and Nancy were there, hanging out as if nothing was wrong. "Can I help you two?"
"Oh, don't mind us. We'll wait." Sasha said with a wide, innocent smile.
"Go, away."
"But we just wanted to hear more about the party you're having."
"There's not going to be a party."
"See, Dylan? Your pokemon have the right idea." Reed said blindly as if he could hear what Sasha was saying.
"Not happening. Go away." Not even waiting for a rebuttal, Dylan slammed the door and shoved his way past Nancy and Sasha.
"You just wait." He could still hear Reed's muffled voice from outside of the door. "I'll figure it out. It'll be the most epic party ever! Alright, I'll just see you later then..."
Dylan was gone by the time he had finished, leaving only Nancy and Sasha in the living room.
"Um, Nancy. Do we...actually want a party to happen? I thought we wanted Dylan out, not more people in."
"It could work in our favor. For now, just keep annoying him. We'll see how it works out."
"I love it when you deviously plot things. You're like a sexy, evil genius."
"And you're my horny little henchman. Now get back up there and annoy him."
"Yes, Ma'am." Sasha saluted.
"Dylan. Dylannnn." Reed pressed his face against Dylan's window. "Open up. Come on! Dylan!" He made ridiculous faces as he slid his face back and forth across the glass. "Open up or I eat you, I eat you now! Graghhhh!"
Over the past two days, Reed had been back and forth with ideas for the party. Everything from a psychedelic rave to a pool party was suggested, and every idea, no matter how 'epic,' was rejected. The ideas were interesting, but the aftermath would always be the same.
Regardless of the ideas now, Dylan had long since decided to ignore Reed, along with the Sasha, Nancy, and the phone. Noise canceling headphones and heavy metal made the task easy.
Humming to the sound of his favorite songs, Dylan contemplated the idea of a party. Sure it seemed like an awesome idea, something straight out of the movies, but they were, after all, just movies. Reality was harsh. He would have to supply the food and drinks, all money out of his pocket. Not to mention the mess everyone would leave behind. No one would help clean. It all amounted to too much work and not a big enough payoff. Still, it didn't hurt to hear one more of Reed's plans, even it was inevitably going to be stupid.
Sighing, Dylan threw his headphones to the side and opened the window.
"Dylan, finally! I've got it, the perfect plan!"
"Listening."
"You're worried about people trashing your house, right? Well forget the house, we'll have it in your backyard! Think about it. Your backyard's huge. We drag a few couches, tables, and chairs, back there, we hook up my sound system with those orange, long ass extension cords, and it'll be just as good. The only time people actually have to go in your house is to take a piss. We can get a few garbage bins so people aren't just dropping trash everywhere. I'll help buy the snacks, Dave can send out invites. Dylan! We can do this!"
It seemed like a good idea at the time, but those were famous last words. "I don't know..."
"You'll never get a chance like this again. Come on." Reed seemed desperate. He had crawled halfway through the window in excitement. Dylan couldn't blame him. His ideas this time were tempting.
"I'll think about it...that is, if you pay for all the snacks..."
"Oh that's dirty. Does that mean you'll do it though?"
"Thinking about it. I'll have an answer tomorrow. Tell you this though, I might be more persuaded if you got those things asap."
"You filthy scum...I'll see what I can do." With a smile, Reed ran off, presumably to do something about the snack and drink situation.
"A backyard party. Son of a bitch. Could work, I guess..."
Taking her ear from the door, Sasha ran downstairs to tell her partner the news. "Nancy, I think the party's on."
Reed menacingly wrung his hands together as his friends transformed Dylan's backyard into the perfect party area. Enclosed by a tall white fence, it was already an ideal location. Chairs - provided graciously by the local dump - lined the edges of the yard. Powerful lamps, screwed to the overhang of Dylan's house and placed on various locations across the fence, would provide light where needed. Reeds four massive speakers sat in each corner of the yard, all wired to a mixer and a set of turntables center stage . The snack tables were set, the punch bowl was in place, everything was coming together. Though one crucial thing had Dylan worried.
"Reed, what are we going to do about the dance floor?"
"You just leave that to me. More importantly, I been meaning to ask about your pokemon. They're not gonna rat us out or anything, are they?"
"Nah, they seemed pretty cool about it. Actually they kinda looked excited when I told 'em. They were also giggling...dunno what that was about."
"Excellent! Now, only a few things left to do." Reed smiled even wider as he continued to wring his hands like an evil mastermind.
"...You're not planning on having any alcohol here, are you? The last thing I want is to get busted for underage drinking."
"No, of course not. Like half the people are invited are under twenty-one. What do you think we bought all the pop for?" Reed's grin was unsettling. "Just go back inside, we got this handled."
Still a bit suspicious, Dylan nodded and left. Moments later, one of Reed's helpers appeared. "Reed, where do you want the '151?'"
"Under the table. We'll spike the punch when Dylan ain't looking."
"Right."
Hours before the party was to begin, people began to show up, in pairs and groups. Friends of Dylan, friends of Reed, and people neither of them had ever seen. Things were getting out of hand, and the party hadn't even started.
Sasha and Nancy sat and watched as people went by. From big-boned jocks to skinny schoolgirls in dresses, everyone imaginable was coming.
"I can't believe so many people came on such short notice. They only came up with party yesterday. Don't they have anything better to do?"
"Well you can blame all those social networking sites for that. Besides, it's spring break, Sasha. What do you expect? Why work or do something productive when you can go over to someone's house, get drunk, and wreck their things?"
"Well you got a point there. I just hope they'll be really loud about it. They'll have to be to cover your moans." Again Sasha's suggestive tone managed to slip out. Nancy was finding it harder and harder to control her. The closer the party, the more anxious Sasha became. But for the sake of secrecy, she would have to hold out.
"Soon, my little piggy. Soon. The longer you wait for something, the sweeter it is."
How and where Reed got a hold of an actual dance floor Dylan would never find out. It was best not to ask questions when it came to Reed. All that needed to be known was that he had connections, and experience. In only a day he had assembled everything and more for the perfect party. An hour early, he was ready to start. With so many people already in attendance, why delay?
Momentarily, loud feedback screeched through the speakers as Reed plugged his microphone in. "Friends, acquaintances, people I don't even know, shut the hell up. It may be an hour early, but I'd say it's about time to get this party started. But, before that, I gotta give a shout out to my friend Dylan who's turning eighteen tonight."
A bright spotlight shined on the unsuspecting Dylan. Close to the snack table and far away from cover, he had nowhere to hide from the eyes of everyone at the party. Embarrassed, he managed to hold his composure as he tried his best to hide his face.
"Ladies, if you catch him, give a birthday kiss and slap . Now I think we've stalled long enough. DJ, hit it!"
The DJ smiled as he stylishly spun his records in the air. "Let's get it started." Deep bass sounded through the speakers, and soon after, the dancing begun. Everyone on the dance floor broke into a rave at the sound of the pulsing, techno beat. The many rays of colored light danced and spun around the yard in vibrant and hypnotic patterns. Reed was proud of his work. The only things missing were a disco ball and a fog machine, but you can't have everything you want.
Not being a fan of techno - or dancing - Dylan stayed out of the way, hanging close to the snack table in particular. He didn't have to lift a finger. It felt like being at someone else's party, and as such, he would devour every snack he could get his hands on. But while he and the other guests played, Nancy and Sasha were planning a party of their own.
"Is it time? Is it time?!" Sasha 's self control was at an all-time low. She made no attempt to hide her anxiousness and shakes as she sat on the couch.
"Geez, you're like a drug addict. Alright, let's go before you-"
"Wow, a hitmonchan! I've never seen one up close." A random partier had taken an interest in Nancy.
"I think he likes me, Sasha."
Amusing as that was, Sasha he no time for random party goers. "Great, fantastic, can we go now?" She said in a hurry.
"Yeah, we might as w-"
"I bet you can break boards with those fists. Do you think you could show me some moves?"
"...Sasha, could you...meet me upstairs? You know the spot."
Smiling wide, Sasha hopped from the couch and dashed upstairs. That would keep her busy for a bit. Turning back to the party goer, Nancy smiled and hopped to her feet. A chance to show off her skill, Nancy couldn't pass up the opportunity.
In the meantime, the party was going strong, and Reed couldn't wait to enact his plan. It wasn't hard to recruit some help. "Psst, Janine, help me out with something. You see that guy over there?"
"Dylan?"
"Mhm, distract him."
"On it."
Dylan - hanging very close to the punch bowl - was still eating, bouncing in tune with the techno beats. The music had grown on him in the past twenty minutes.
Caught in the music and oblivious to his surroundings, he had no way of knowing when Janine would strike, or that she was after him at all. He had just finished a hand full of popcorn when she came out of nowhere and dragged him away from the snack table.
In a corner, behind a crowd of people, she grabbed him by the shirt and pulled him into a kiss. Dylan had no idea how to react. He could only stand in shock as the random woman kissed him.
Out the corner of her eye, Janine could see Reed retrieve the bottle of alcohol from underneath the table. With no subtlety or measurements, he poured the entire container into the punch and mixed it all together. He gave Janine the sign and she broke the kiss.
"Happy birthday, birthday boy." She patted Dylan on the head and left without another word.
"...Well, at least I have a story to tell now..."
Up in Max and Sharon's room, Sasha bounced and twitched in anticipation, unable to contain her excitement, or her need for sex.
"Come on, come on, come on. What are you doing down there, Nancy?" Seconds stretched on like minutes, and minutes stretched on like hours. Sasha wouldn't last long at this rate. "Gotta calm down. Just relax, I'm fine. I'm okay. I'm horny as hell! Nancy, where are you!"
Out in a less populated section of the yard, Nancy demonstrated her skills to a small crowd of pupils. "One fist is always guarding your face. Extend your arm all the way and you have a straight punch. You'll get faster and faster at it until..." Nancy threw a blinding flurry of punches with only one hand. Though the crowd couldn't understand a word she said, they were amazed by her speed and technique.
"Hey uh, Dylan." Reed called from an unknown location. He worked his way through the crowd to find Dylan in one of the many chairs on the sidelines.
"Hmm?"
"What's the deal with your hitmonchan? He's kinda...fruity."
"Fruity?"
"Look at him." Off by the punch bowl, Nancy stood in a somewhat feminine pose as she chatted and mingled with some of her fans. "He even sounds fruity. What is he gay or something?"
"...No she's a girl."
"Bull crap. Hitmonchan can't be female."
"Well they're not supposed to, but it happens. Well kinda, it's like a birth defect. Like she was supposed to be a he, but he was born 'she' parts. And the planets must have aligned or something cause he also has like a fuckton more estrogen than a normal guy should have, so he's not like a dude trapped in a woman's body, still kind of tomboyish though. He thought he was a girl so my dad kinda raised him as a her, and well, he is a her technically. It's kinda why my dad didn't get rid of her when he gave up being a trainer, she was so rare. Now she just hangs around the house all day doing nothing with Sasha."
"Speaking of, where is that grumpig anyway? Every time I seen those two they were together."
"Sasha's not over there somewhere?"
"Nope."
"Weird...I'm gonna go take a look around."
After another twenty minutes of pacing, Sasha had gone almost insane. She sat on the bedroom floor, her eyes wide and her body giving off an occasional tremble. Her mind was blank, save for one thing.
"Sex." She repeated again and again.
Before long, an unsuspecting couple found their way into the room. Only after the man of the couple tripped and fell did they notice the grumpig on the floor. The man rose, annoyed at the small obstacle. "Beat it. I'm trying to score here."
"Sex..."
"Huh?"
Without warning, the door slammed shut behind them.
Having just entered the house, Dylan sprinted upstairs after hearing faint, but unmistakable screams over the loud music. They were coming from his parent's room. Try as he might to force the door open, it wouldn't budge in the slightest. There was only one other way into the room, and Dylan had to move fast.
He ran into his sister's room - the room closest to his parent's. There he jumped from her window and grabbed on to the roof's overhang. As quickly as he could, he shimmied his way to his parent's window. He could see inside. There was a woman suspended in midair. Only Sasha could do such a thing. Why she would was anyone's guess.
Once inside, Dylan was shocked to find Sasha pulling the woman's pants down. "Sasha, no!" The second he lifted her into the air, the women fell to the ground. The man, which Dylan hadn't noticed, broke free of the closet.
"Is that your pokemon, man? Tell her to lay off."
"No, she's my sister's and you get the hell out of here. This is my parent's room." All of a sudden, Sasha began a glow a bright blue. "Now!"
Not wanting to risk their lives, the couple ran downstairs as fast as possible.
Sasha glowed even brighter, prompting Dylan to drop her and step away. Her eyes glowing a bright blue, Sasha stood and took slow steps towards Dylan. He had no choice but to take slow steps backwards. A little fearful, he couldn't pay attention to his surroundings. Before he knew it, he had tripped and tumbled down the stairs. The only upside was that there was no one in the living room to witness the embarrassingly painful display, but that was the least of his worries.
By the time he looked up, Sasha was making her way down the stairs.
"Crap, crap, crap, crap!"
Dylan bolted toward to the backyard. Still not paying attention, he slammed into someone on the way through the kitchen door. Both of them fell to the ground in yet another embarrassing and painful display.
"Whew, saved my drink." It was Reed, with punch.
"Oh my God, Reed, where's Nancy?"
"Who?"
"The hitmonchan!"
"Whoa, relax, she's still near the punch bowl with some of her 'fans.' Why?"
"That's why!" Dylan yelled as he pointed to Sasha at the bottom of the stairs. Objects in the living room were beginning to float, and Sasha was glowing brighter than ever.
"Yikes."
"We can't let her get outside. Go get Nancy. I'll distract her..."
Reed wasted no time running to fetch Nancy. But Dylan was left with a major problem.
As Sasha reached the kitchen, everything inside began to shake and move. Dishes flew, utensils floated, it was like a pokemon poltergeist
"Sasha, I want you to calm down. Can you hear me? Ah!" Dylan narrowly dodged a fork to the head. Hoping for some kind of protection, he ran around the kitchen table. At the very least, he could distance himself from Sasha. But things never go as planned.
Sasha launched the table and all of the chairs into the corner of the kitchen. Dylan had nowhere left to go. "S-Sasha, come on. It's me, Dylan. Sasha? H-hold up, wait."
"Dylan!" Reed yelled from the door.
"Kinda busy!"
"No, I got your hitmonchan, but we got a problem..."
"What kind of problem?"
Reed stepped to the side as Nancy stumbled into the kitchen. The way she moved, the way she smelled, the way she looked, it was unmistakable. "Is she drunk!?"
"Maybe."
"Damn it, Reed! I said no alcohol!"
"I think they were trying to get her to do drunken boxing."
"Drunken boxing isn't even- ugh, never mind. Nancy, do something!"
As if she didn't hear, Nancy stood place, struggling to keep herself from falling over. For a time, she stared into space, her eyes drooped and her legs wobbly.
Reed couldn't help but laugh. "Your hitmonchan's so wasted. She must have drunk half the bowl."
"Shut up."
Only after Sasha had lifted Dylan into the air did Nancy decide to move. She hobbled and stumbled her way forward only to fall face-first at Sasha's feet. It took effort, but Nancy managed to stand. Soon after, she fell, just barely managing to grab on to Sasha's shoulders.
Both Dylan and Reed looked on in shock as Nancy grabbed Sasha's face and pulled her into a kiss. Even as Dylan landed on his head, he couldn't look away as Sasha began to kiss back. Both her and Nancy toppled over, moaning and darting their tongues in and out of each other's mouths.
"Holy crap, I'm getting the camera!" Reed smiled as he ran off. Dylan didn't hesitate to follow.
"You get your ass back here!"
Sasha and Nancy were left to their kiss, but it didn't last long as they broke apart for air.
"You're unusually affectionate today, Nancy."
Nancy chuckled to herself. "I know a secret. Wanna see?"
"Will it make me as horny as you?"
Nancy flashed a wide and mischievous smile.
Minutes later, both Dylan and Reed returned, but Nancy and Sasha were gone. They weren't hard to find. Out in the backyard, the party goers were crowded around the snack table. Dylan prepared for the worst as he listened to them chant and cheer.
Reluctantly, he and Reed pushed their way through the crowd to find a disturbing sight - Nancy and Sasha, taking turns chugging from a keg as the crowd cheered them on.
"Where the hell did you get kegs!?"
"I was wondering when those would show up. They were supposed to be here hours ago."
"Damn it, Reed!"
The crowd broke into thunderous cheers and applause as both Sasha and Nancy polished off a keg. With no regard for secrecy anymore, they shared a sloppy, beer-filled kiss in front of everyone.
Most of the men and women laughed and joked about how sick it was, but recorded the scene anyway on their phones and cameras.
Dylan could only sigh and hold his head down. "At least things can't get any worse."
Drunker than ever before, Nancy staggered her way forward, draping her arms over Dylan's shoulders for balance. "Dylan." She said as if he could understand. "This is...party is..." Completely unable to find her words, she broke into a laugh. "I love parties!"
Before Dylan had a chance to react, Nancy kissed him like she would Sasha. The overpowering taste of beer in her mouth was almost enough to make Dylan choke, and with Nancy's long, slimy tongue in his mouth, he almost did. The crowd continued to laugh and cheer, not once thinking of releasing the 'record' buttons on their cameras and phones.
Embarrassed beyond belief and desperate for air, Dylan feverishly tried to push Nancy away, but her strength held him in place until she was finished.
One airless minute later and Nancy pulled away, a long trail of saliva still connecting her tongue with Dylan's. Most of the party goers ended their recordings once the moment was over, but a small few continued to watch Dylan, coughing, sputtering, and wiping his mouth as he left. Nobody saw him for the remainder of the night, but then again, no one looked. For hours on end, people ate, drank, and danced. They laughed, mingled, and partied with no end in sight. The only person who should have been there, wasn't.
Dylan spent what seemed like forever brushing his teeth and trying to rid his mouth of the the taste of beer and pokemon spit. After a tube of toothpaste and half a bottle of mouthwash, he gave up and went to lie down. Even with his noise canceling headphones, he doubted he could drown out the booming bass of Reed's speakers. Dylan didn't feel very sleepy anyway.
He sat in bed for hours, listening to the music, and wondering how long it would be before someone posted footage of him kissing a hitmonchan on the internet. With his luck, someone probably already had. He didn't know which was worse, people thinking he was pokephile, or people thinking he was gay for kissing a supposedly male pokemon. After some thinking, Dylan found them both equally bad. Hopefully everyone would get their laughs out of it before school started again. Besides the free food, that was the nights only redeeming quality.
Dylan wasn't sure how long he had stayed in bed, but after some time had passed, he heard a knock on the door. Before he could answer it, the person walked in. Dylan only knew one person who did that. "What do you want, Reed?" He sounded tired, almost depressed.
"Hey, I know the party didn't quite turn out the way you wanted it, and you're probably embarrassed as hell. I mean I would be too. That pic of you is on background of everyone's phone. But I got a present to make it up to you. Well sort of. I got everyone to throw a couple bucks into a bowl for your birthday."
Dylan hadn't looked at Reed. He had no way of noticing the large, white bowl in his hands. It was almost overflowing with money. "There were a lot of people down there." Reed continued. "And quite of few of them were pretty generous. You gotta have like three-hundred bucks in here. Anyway, I'm off. I think I finally got Kaley's sister drunk enough to have sex with. Happy birthday." Reed set the bowl on the desk next to him before leaving and closing the door behind him.
"Alright, two redeeming qualities for the night."
Minutes after Reed left, there was another knock at the door, only this one was more of a bang than a knock. For a minute, the knob jiggled back and forth as if the person using it had no idea how it worked. But soon enough, the door flung open, and Nancy landed in the doorway. Sasha wasn't far behind.
Dylan rolled over, not even turning an eye to the two pokemon. "Get out of here, you two. You smell like liquor and ass."
"Now come on, don't be such a party pooper." Sasha's voice didn't sound drunk in Dylan's head. But it made sense. In her mind, she was probably talking perfectly fine, if not a little slow. "It's your birthday. Live a little."
"Is that all you came up here to tell me? 'Cause if it is, I don't care. Go away."
"No we came up for...for uh...Nancy, what were we doing again?"
Nancy could barely remember where she was, let alone what she was doing. She shrugged her shoulders in defeat.
"Mmm, well uh, Happy New Year!...wait, Happy Birthday. Yeah that's it. Oh! I remember what we were doing. Grab him, Nancy."
Her words took a moment to register in Dylan's mind. "Wait, what?" He had no time to turn as Nancy grabbed him from behind. With little effort, she positioned him as planned, his back to her chest. No matter how much he struggled, Dylan couldn't move, not with Nancy holding his arms down - a prisoner on his own bed.
"What are you guys doing?"
Still struggling against Nancy, Dylan hadn't noticed Sasha climbing between his legs. "We're giving you your birthday present. Be lucky, I'm only doing this cause Nancy suggested it. I know you men, give 'em an inch and they take...uh...how does the saying go? Ah, who cares. Hold still."
"Wait, y-you guys. We can't do this. It's..." Dylan struggled to find his words under pressure. "...not...right. It's not right. Humans and pokemon can't...and you guys are drunk." He squirmed as best he could, trying desperately to stop Sasha from undoing his pants. His efforts served only to slow her down as his pants were off within the minute. "I-I'm not even into pokemon. You guys wouldn't want me. W-what if someone catches us? Uh, um, I haven't showered today, I probably smell." Dylan used every excuse he could think of, but none of them deterred the drunk and horny pokemon.
"Cut loose. It's your birthday." Nancy said in a drunken slur. "You know, you're kinda cute when you're struggling."
Dylan couldn't understand her, but he didn't like the suggestive tone in her voice. Nor did he like her breathing down his neck. He could feel her mouth drawing closer and closer as her breath warmed his skin. Already it felt weird, but the feeling only grew worse as Nancy began to plant kisses on his neck.
They were gentle at first, but that didn't last long. Quickly her kisses went from soft pecks, to hard, wet smooches. Nancy chuckled as Dylan quivered and writhed at her touch. He was so sensitive. It made Nancy smile.
Distracted by Nancy's odd, yet strangely arousing kisses, Dylan stopped struggling long enough for Sasha to remove his underwear. Try as he might, he couldn't fight his growing erection, especially with Sasha caressing him. None of it should have aroused him. Sex with pokemon was sick. This was something Reed would do. But then why was it so hard to resist? Trapped in between two horny pokemon, and feeling more excited than he should have, Dylan found the question impossible to answer.
As Sasha worked from below, Nancy continued from above, trying her best to soften Dylan up. Soon she went beyond just kisses. Dylan gasped as he felt her dragging her tongue across his neck, her loud, slimy licks filling his ears and making things just as arousing as they were uncomfortable.
Slowly but surely, Dylan's resistance faded away. The struggling stopped, his muscles relaxed, his will to fight disappeared into nothingness. Already his member was on the rise. Sasha needed only to help it along with long licks and gentle caresses. Dylan fought the urge to gasp as her warm tongue licked him up and down. It was smooth, made slick by the ample amounts of saliva coating every inch of it.
Her licks were firm, stronger than Dylan thought a tongue could be. They had him shaking and writhing, clenching and unclenching his hands and feet just to keep himself under control. The feeling of her tongue wrapping itself around his member was better than anything he had ever felt.
One after another, small dollops of pre emerged from his tip. Sasha was more than happy to lick them up as they trailed down his sides in long, sticky streams. As if Sasha needed a reason to go on, Dylan had a sweet and salty flavoring. She wanted more and she knew just how to get it.
Dylan grunted as he felt her mouth close around his tip. His eyes shut tight as her moist maw slowly engulfed his length. As Sasha pushed farther and farther down, the warm confines of her mouth gave way to the tight depths of her throat. Dylan's member was enveloped and squeezed from all sides, the feeling finally causing him to lose control and moan out loud.
Soon Sasha reached his base, and once there, she immediately began to bob her head. Up and down she moved at an agonizingly slow speed. She watched Dylan's face twist and contort, his eyes clenched, his mouth wide open, and his tongue hanging in the air. He wasn't going anywhere. Once the message was conveyed to Nancy, she laid him against his headboard and moved around to where she was needed.
Too focused on the task at hand, Sasha couldn't see what Nancy was doing behind her, but she knew her horny hitmomchan well, and could more than guess what she was up to.
Sasha wasn't surprised as she felt a soft lick across her wet, sensitive slit. She had been waiting days for that wondrous feeling. Nancy was right, it was better after waiting.
With Nancy doing what she did best, Sasha had a hard time pleasing Dylan. She grunted and groaned, trying her hardest to stay focused, but against Nancy, she stood no chance. Nancy knew every one of Sasha's most sensitive area's, and over the years had become an expert at exploiting them.
Nancy started gentle as she slid her long, slender tongue up and down Sasha's slit. She could feel Sasha tremble as she lightly tickled her. Nancy smiled. Sasha was already leaking, and a hefty amount too. The softest touch sent shivers up Sasha's spine, and Nancy had barely begun licking. It wasn't long before her licks grew in strength. Farther and farther she dug, wiggling her tongue deep into Sasha's depths. Nancy had grown to love Sasha's taste. It was always so warm and sweet, like a never-ending well of thin, watery honey. The sight of it streaming down Sasha's thighs was irresistible. Nancy would never tire of it.
Holding Sasha's rump steady, Nancy pushed even deeper into her tunnel. Her skills with her tongue soon became apparent as Sasha's entire body began shake and quiver. All of her most delicate areas were poked and prodded again and again without mercy. She couldn't move or wiggle as Nancy still held her tight. Dealing with it was her only option.
In a rush to finish with Dylan, Sasha bobbed her head at an heightened speed. Increasingly loud slurps emanated from her mouth as she sucked him harder and harder. She continued to run her tongue up and down Dylan's length. She pressed it hard against his member. The feeling was almost too much for him.
Sasha was so enthusiastic, bobbing her head at unreal speeds, taking Dylan far down her throat with every push, and sporadically flicking her tongue against every inch of his member. The feeling was amazing. He felt every one of his muscles tense. His body began to quiver. He panted faster and faster by the second. There was no use trying to hold back, he couldn't take it anymore.
Feeling Dylan twitch, Sasha pulled back, letting his member fly free as he finally came. Immediate relief and a rush of pleasure surged through his loins. He threw his head back, groaning out as his member fired string after string of white, sticky cum. Still feeling as dirty as ever, Sasha opened her mouth wide, catching as much as she could. Her mouth was promptly filled with the salty-sweet taste, and she loved it. The rest of Dylan's thin, white streams landed all over over her face in soft, gooey plops. She didn't mind. She licked up what she could and left the rest alone. It felt kinkier that way.
Before Sasha could do anything more, she was thrown on her back by her very horny, partner. Nancy crawled on all fours like a wild beast, her predatory gaze not only scaring Sasha, but turning her on as well. She made no effort to resist as her legs were spread wide and held tight under Nancy's gloves.
As always, Sasha's pussy was plump and wet with excitement., even more so now that it had been days since it was last serviced. It had to be a record for Sasha, one Nancy intended to break. The time for tenderness was over.
Once again she thrust her tongue between Sasha's fleshy folds, making the grumpig arch her back at the amazing feeling. Nancy drove her tongue deep, wildly flailing it about with no sense of direction or pattern. It darted in and out, back and forth, tickling every inch of Sasha's sensitive tunnel.
Nancy's licks were messier and more erratic than usual, possibly a side-effect of being so intoxicated. They were everywhere, up and down Sasha's slit, in and out of her hole, over and around her labia, and across her clit. Sasha couldn't help but thrash back and forth, moaning and wailing at the unimaginable amount of pleasure surging through her body.
All the while making Sasha moan, Nancy's rump swayed rhythmically in Dylan's face. Whether it was on purpose or not, he couldn't tell, but it was strangely arousing. For a pokemon, Nancy had quite the ass. It was smooth and so perfectly rounded. Given how naturally athletic she was, it was sure to be firm as well. Thinking of it in such a way felt so wrong, but then again, Dylan had just gotten a blowjob from a grumpig, and enjoyed it. What more was there to lose?
Not having expected Dylan to recover so quickly, Nancy jumped when she felt his hand rubbing her bottom. She didn't expect him to be so willing, but she wasn't complaining. His hand felt nice as it gently squeezed her hind end. It wasn't long before his other hand joined in, rubbing up and down Nancy's legs and thighs. The only barrier between Dylan and his goal was the thin piece of cloth covering Nancy's ass. The tough, purple fabric slid down as easily as a pair of underwear would, and underneath lay Nancy's smooth, brown flesh.
It was just as firm as Dylan expected, and as smooth as it looked. Beautiful as it was, Dylan's real objective was in sight. There in between Nancy's legs, her slit dripped with arousal. It's lips were thin, frail looking, and as far Dylan could see, there was no clit to speak of - an almost featureless slit. It seemed small, but small meant tight, and tight was a good thing, in Dylan's mind.
Dylan didn't stare for long. His dirty thoughts and painfully hard member made sure of it. Before he knew it, his hands seemed to move on their own, reaching underneath Nancy's skirt and grabbing hold of her round ass.
Dylan's hips moved themselves forward as his hands pulled Nancy backwards. Once contact was made, there was no stopping. Nancy was tight as expected, but not to the point of pain. Her walls were soft and wet, almost like Dylan's member was encased wet, snug cushions.. They hugged Dylan tight, squeezing and conforming to every bump and ridge along his member. Nancy let out a long, loud moan as she was slowly penetrated. She hadn't felt something so warm and thick in years. She had almost forgotten the feeling, but now it was fresh in her mind, and she couldn't get enough of it.
After the slow process of penetration, Nancy sighed as she began to grind her rump against Dylan's crotch. Her breath was heavy, strained. She was hornier than ever and it showed. Ignoring Sasha for a moment, she looked backwards and gave Dylan a seductive smile, as seductive as possible under intoxicated circumstances. Any doubts left in Dylan's mind had long since disappeared. There was no going back now.
Dylan put a firm hold on Nancy's hips before beginning his onslaught of moderately powerful thrusts. Her ass was strong, tough as expected, but not bony. It felt so wrong, but at the same time, so right. He doubted he could find many girls with asses like this. That was more than enough reason to continue.
Nancy found it increasingly hard to focus as Dylan's member pierced her folds again and again. It wasn't long before she was moaning into Sasha's crotch. Dylan penetrated deep, his tip repeatedly hammering the entrance to her cervix. She could feel every inch of him rubbing and grinding against her sensitive walls. Not to mention the feeling of being pounded. It was a feeling she couldn't get with Sasha alone. She had forgotten just how much she loved it. She rocked her body back and forth in a attempt to make Dylan slam her harder. But Dylan was way ahead of her.
He loved watching her ass bounce back and forth on his cock. And her skirt had never been sexier. He rammed her harder and harder, loving the feeling of her tunnel pulsating around his member. He could swear she was gripping him tighter with every passing minute. The pleasure it brought was intoxicating. He hadn't realized how hard he was gripping Nancy or how rough he was actually being.
Loud, lustful slaps echoed throughout the room as he savagely pulled her into his powerful thrusts. The force shook the foundation of the bed. It swayed to and fro, slamming into the wall and sending the sounds of sex throughout the house.
Nancy had long since forgotten about Sasha. The amazing feeling coursing through her body blocked all rational thought. Anything and everything outside of her own pleasure became nonexistent. Her orgasm was fast approaching. Her moans grew louder by the second, every one of Dylan's thrusts sending them higher in pitch. She could feel it, the incredible yet overpowering sensation building in her loins. It was coming. There was no stopping it, and that was just the way she wanted it.
Her body quivering, Nancy finally reached her peak. She screamed loud enough for the neighborhood to hear as the pleasure overwhelmed her. Stars filled her vision. Her tunnel violently twitched and throbbed. Fierce tremors wracked her body. She couldn't remember the last time she felt something so great. The sensation was almost mind numbing. So amazing was the feeling that Nancy hadn't noticed Sasha struggling beneath her. Still pinned down by Nancy's gloves, there was nothing Sasha could do as she watched her partner have all the fun. Being ignored was frustrating, but being denied her pleasure was rage-inducing.
Even in the afterglow of Nancy's orgasm, she still possessed more than enough strength to hold Sasha down. But little by little, as Nancy regained her composure she began to formulate a small plan of her own, one that would not only quell Sasha's rage, but help Dylan, who hadn't quite reached his peak.
He had no way to predict that Nancy would rise and knock him backwards onto his butt. The surprise lasted only a second before the anger set in. He went to complain, but stopped himself as he watched Nancy lift her partner to her chest. Sasha struggled and flailed but ultimately could do nothing as Nancy spun her toward Dylan and pried her legs wide open.
As horny as Dylan was, Sasha's thick, purple lips were more appealing than they would ever be. Sopping wet and dribbling juices, her folds were a picture of arousal. A sight that should have disgusted Dylan, now almost made him blush as he imagined burying his face in them and licking up all the juices they contained. His cock throbbed at the thought.
Driven forward by pure lust, Dylan crawled his way over to Sasha. Nancy spread the grumpig's legs even wider as he inched his way closer. Whatever Sasha was screaming was only background noise as the head of Dylan's member began to prod at her folds. As resolute as her protests were, Sasha was quick to stop as Dylan's member pushed deeper and deeper into her cunt. Her mouth opened wide and she let out a long, airy moan as her depths were stretched wider than they had ever been. This feeling of fullness was new, foreign, and utterly amazing. Her entire body tensed as she felt the thick intrusion slowly grinding against every sensitive in her tunnel. She had no idea it could get better.
Before she knew it, Dylan's rod had filled her hole. She and Nancy had tried numerous things overs the years, but none of them could compare to what she felt now. Grabbing hold of Sasha's hips, Dylan began to thrust back and forth. Over and over again, his member stretched her wide, pushing forcefully against her tender walls. With every passing second, she grew more and more aroused, the heavy abundance of juices pouring from her hole making it evident to everyone.
Because of size differences, Sasha was tight, even tighter than Nancy, and much better than anything Dylan had ever felt before. Every rough push into her depths was a new burst of pleasure as her vaginal muscles tightened around him. The feeling of her huge lips against his skin was an added bonus.
He loved all the sounds she made. She was too far gone to speak telepathically, but instead, Dylan was treated to the sounds of her hoarse squeals and husky moans. They only grew in volume as he continued forced his cock deep into her depths.
As Dylan increased his speed, Nancy spread Sasha's legs wider, allowing for easier access. Dylan pushed harder with every passing moment, soon squeezing Sasha between himself and Nancy. Such a close proximity was proving to be quite the turn on, for Sasha, Dylan, and Nancy. With Dylan's face so close to hers, she couldn't resist.
Letting go of Sasha's legs, she reached her arms around Dylan's head, pulling him in to another long and messy kiss. Seeing no point in resisting, he gladly returned it. In his heightened state of arousal, he couldn't care less about the overpowering taste of alcohol, or the fact that half of the spit inside of his mouth wasn't his own. He had passed the point of no return long ago. Shame was the last thing on his mind as he reached an arm around Nancy's head and tied his tongue with hers.
Unaware and uncaring of the events going on above her, Sasha began to quiver and quake. She wrapped her arms and legs around Dylan's waist as his member went deeper than ever before. The feeling of fullness was now greater than ever as every last inch of Sasha's tunnel was stroked by the throbbing hunk of meat. Everything was a blur. The only things left in Sasha's mind were the unreal amounts of pleasure surging through her body, and the overwhelming need for release.
Dylan pushed and pushed into her until finally her moment arrived. She let out a loud, shuddering moan as her orgasm hit. Again and again she bucked her hips forward as her orgasm hit her in waves. Her arms and legs squeezed Dylan tightly. Her strength was almost painful, but Dylan didn't care. It was impossible to hold back any longer as Sasha's tunnel tightened and quaked around him. Moaning into Nancy's mouth, he came as well, thick pulses of cum erupting from his member and staining Sasha's depths in his gooey seed. He could feel Sasha trembling beneath him, her juices trailing down his front as she succumbed to her pleasure and began to go limp. Dylan wasn't far behind. As his member unleashed its final spurt, he broke the kiss with Nancy and fell backwards. The world went dark before he hit the bed.
"You what?!"
"Yep, recorded the whole thing." Reed stated proudly over the phone. "Seriously, I could hear you guys all the way downstairs, even with the music going. By the way, you really should lock your door before doing something like that."
"We...but...gah!"
"Relax, no one was in the house and I'm the only one who's seen the vid."
"Good! Delete it!"
Reed couldn't help but laugh. "What are you kidding me? This one's going in my vault. Personal fap fodder, you know? By the way, congrats, you're one of us now!"
"I'm not one of you...people."
"Then that sex wasn't the greatest thing you've ever felt?"
"No!...well...that's not the point!"
"Welcome to the Dark Side, Dylan. Don't worry, we have cookies! Also just a thought. Have you ever considered being a porn star? I haven't seen anything so hot since we got Mark drunk and had him make out with a lickitu-"
Dylan slammed the phone down before Reed could finish. "Never again."
As he sat and fumed, Nancy sluggishly made her way downstairs, the consequences of binge drinking forever burned into her mind. With a pounding headache and a feeling in her gut that made her want to vomit, chances are she would never pick up alcohol again. Dylan expected Sasha to feel the same way, but to his surprise, she smiled and hummed as she skipped past Nancy on her way down the stairs. She had never felt better.
"Gooooood morning, you two!"
Both Dylan and Nancy groaned. "Aw you're such party poopers. Dylan!" Sasha yelled as she hung on to the back of the couch. "You know, you are one hell of a guy. I didn't think any man could please me like that, let alone a human. Must have been having sex with the wrong guys."
"As drunk as you were, I'm surprised you even remember last night."
"Oh I can remember, every, last, sexy little detail." The suggestive tone in her voice did little to put Dylan's mind at ease.
"Good for you. Now go away."
"I've been thinking, you really outta join me and Nancy more often." Sasha leaned in close, whispering the words into Dylan's ear. "Imagine the things we could do together, all the hot, sexy things." Dylan cringed as she dragged her tongue along the side of his face.
"Dammit! Get the hell away from me!"
"Mmm, just thinking about your huge cock is getting me wet."
"Sasha."
"The feeling of you jamming it right in there."
"Sasha."
"All hot and thick and-"
"Sasha!"
"Wet, stuffing one hole while Nancy licks the other."
As Sasha rambled on, Nancy finally made her way downstairs. Holding her head, she plopped down on the couch.
"Nancy, does she always do this?"
Nancy nodded. "Get used to it."
Dylan sighed. It was too late for regret, but at least things couldn't get any worse...