Gender Confusion.
?I woke up. I was in a cave, feeling afterglow, unable to stand up. It was raining outside. I closed my eyes to reflect. After my mission and reward, Demiurgus didn't needed me anymore, só I was thrown back to the Sensible Reality.
I looked down, realizing I was still nude. I grabbed my weenie, feeling nothing different. I had flashes of my last pawing seccion and touched my lips by reflex. All that rush got me thinking as I enjoyed my afterglow. I remembered that my tailhole and muzzle needed stimulation too and I felt great when I satisfied them. I shook my head. "No", I thought, "I won't yiff, never ever! No one is going to stick anything inside me!"
I started to feel silly. What if I'm actually gay? Does it has something to do with my regression? Because sexuality is defined during the cubhood and I'm a cub again, só... maybe... Maybe my sexuality was erased and is being built again. "What the Hell is going on?", I think, getting rather worried. I shook my head again and sat up. "Is it really that bad?", I think, "I have a lot of gay friends, só what is the problem at all? Why is sexuality subject of worry? It's my sexuality, no one has anything to do with it..." Despite my rationalizations, I still felt very worried.
I laid again, feeling thoughtful, having flashes of everything that happened. I didn't felt guilty, just blank. My emotions were drained for a while and I needed some time to recover from what I did.
"I won't paw for a long time", I thought, feeling like I had left my libido in the Ideal World. It was night and I was enjoying the sound of the rain outside.
I just laid there, staring at the nothing, feeling true nolontade. I closed my eyes to, once again, take a nap.
I woke up again, the rain had stopped. I got up to take a walk. My libido was still gone; by this time of the day, I should be dying to paw off. The idea probably taught my body that pawing is better after some denial.
While I walked over the puddles of that warm umid day, I longed for a bath and, of course, a diaper.
I walked to a river and stepped inside. I sat and sighed. I started to wash myself softly, my tummy, then my weenie, then balls... soon I was enjoying myself again. I stopped after a while as I had no motivation to continue (for now; my addiction would kick in soon).
The river was calm and the trees were tall and very, very leafy. I got up and walked around still umid, só the sun would dry me off. My lower parts longed for something comfy to cover them. I craved my diapers.
It was afternoon. I had no money or anything, all I could do was to wait. I wish I had someone to talk with, at least.
I walked to the nearest city. There, I could beg for some money until I had enough to buy diapers.
With my dignity regained (I was naked, now I at least have a diaper on), I had a few coins to buy something to eat before my predator impulses kicked in.
Once I bought me some lunch, I walked again to the limits of the city. I started to miss my home, but it wouldn't change the fact that I was now on my very own. I looked at my diaper pack. "At least, I can feel safe", I giggled at the thought. I patted my diaper and resumed walking through the forest, leaving the city behind. I began thinking about my sexuality again. "I dunno... I actually loved everything I did in the Ideal World", I thought,"I wonder if I'm actually gay, as I can't really do that without either being too horny or having someone with me."
But, then again, it was because of the idea of pawing. All I did while on the Ideal World was by myself, with my tail, my fingers, my paws and tongue.
No matter how much I wanted to wave the question away from my mind, it always came back stronger.
I continued my way, giving in to my curiosity and determined to find who I am.