Snow Bunny Ch.5
#5 of Snow Bunny
Gentle rays of the sun reached out through the thick clouds, lazily licking up the winter wonderland. Everything was covered with white powder, pure for the first rays of the morning. The blood from the slaughtered was covered and shimmered innocently to blend in perfectly with the surroundings.
Nothing moved and nothing spoke in fear of tainting what little good was left. Rabbits burrowed deeper into the earth, huddling together for warmth. Foxes yawned and curled up tighter, not in the mood to venture out into the ice. Hibernating creatures slumbered on, dreams of lush green fields and bright sunlight filling their minds.
Deep in the center of this place were the most feared creatures. The noble tribe of wolves hid in their caves, struggling for survival. Those old enough to remember their unquestionable rein lay in resentment, despising the cats.
Mates held each other; the constant fear that the vengeful winter may come and take one away filled their every thought. The mothers clung onto their youngest child in hopes that it would survive just a few more months. The fathers kissed their mate's foreheads, gently stroking her thin body, praying that she would eat soon. For this is how death came to them. The females would instinctively sacrifice themselves for the life of their child, refusing to eat until the child was full. They shed their clothing to wrap it around the shivering pup, cuddling it to keep warm.
The fathers could only watch on in desperation as their loves slowly killed themselves. Such hopelessness should never be felt by any person. And from this hopelessness came hate, snarling with revenge. The cats never had to deal with this in their plentiful lands, and they despised them for it.
The pale rays of the sun continued onward to shine on the steep, rocky sides of the mountains. It caressed the small grey parts of rock that still survived the storms. It slid into the gaps to the hidden sanctuary.
Kadell was up, dressing lowly, deep in thought. He tied the leather knots of his shirt with automatic fingers, his eyes vacant. He slid on black arm bands, ones that covered his forearms. Lastly, he slid on boots. A ghost of a memory whispered into his ear of a time when the winters weren't harsh and he had no need for such heavy add-ons.
His eyes shut tightly with pain, the whisper bringing screams of the past. He pushed such thoughts away, his head twisting in pain as he did.
He began to walk towards the entrance, passing the bed as he did. He paused and looked at the sleeping figure sprawled across it.
Liolyn hugged a fur roll tightly, the other arm stretched out as a head rest. The very tip of the roll was in his mouth from where he had bit it in his sleep. His once unmarked back had a few bite and claw marks. Furs were pushed away from him and bunched around his waist.
Kadell quietly spread the pelt over the cat's body. He reached down and grabbed the large, thick fur of a bear demon that he kept folded near the wall. It covered his extremely large bed easily and he didn't use it unless the blizzards were harsher than usual and he needed the almost suffocating heat.
He dragged the black fur up to cover almost all of Liolyn, only half of his head peaked out.
Kadell gently slid the back of his fingers over the caramel hair before gently kissing the top. Liolyn's scent filled his nose as he did and he bit his lip. He straightened and left.
Golden eyes slid open and the cat sat up. He looked sadly at the entrance before rolling over and curling up in a tight ball.
Snow crunched under heavy boots as Kadell walked through the mountains, no specific path in mind. He stared vacantly at the blaring white. He was thankful that there was no blizzard that day and the unforgiving clouds had poured all it could during the night. But as his face rose to the sky, he saw the swirling masses of grey tumble together and gathering forces for another attack.
He jumped up the side of the mountains to the very top. He stretched, arms clasping together as they pushed up. He walked to a large rock that looked over the scenery. He stood on the very tip, eyes hard as an icy gust blew over him, ruffling his hair. He growled slightly as the wind clawed at his clothes, pulling on him. He held his ground and the wind passed begrudgingly.
Gray eyes slid across the snow covered forest. He usually went to this spot during the warm summers, grass growing thick over the top. Moss clung to the rock and some sort of flower grew sparsely.
Shadows formed before his vision as ghosts appeared, running and laughing. A small black haired child ran over to him.
"Daddy! Daddy! Look at what I can do! I can jump up here all by myself!"
Kadell snapped his eyes closed as pain shot through, searing his very soul. The boy haunted him.
"Daddy... m... mommy is... she wouldn't move... she wouldn't... help her, daddy... help... her..."
Kadell's hand gripped his hair as he growled, tears pricking and stinging his eyes. He flung his head back and roared as loud as he could. The desperate and angry noise echoed throughout the mountain side.
Kadell panted lightly afterward, feeling much better. Sometimes he just had to scream. Sometimes he just needed it to get by.
He collapsed on the rock, feet flat the on stone and hands behind him to support his upper body. The icy rock stung his palms but it was a distraction. His eyes were closed as his breathing slowed.
His thoughts drifted to the sleeping cat in his cave. What was he going to do with him? Surely he couldn't stay with him. The creature had a one track mind and it was at a place where he didn't want to venture to.
Kadell sighed.
He would be lying if he said he wasn't lonely. Of course he was. There were times when it was almost suffocating him. Even when he lived with the other wolves it felt like he was the only one there.
Of course his sister stayed close to him. Gira loved him dearly. He had raised her, watched over her when no one else could. She had stayed unmated for half a century because he challenged every potential mate for her. No normal male was worthy of her love. They had to prove to him that they could take care of her.
Adrex had been a good choice for her. He was strong, clever, and kind. Even so, Gira had to practically beg Kadell to let Adrex take her.
Kadell let his arms slide out from under him so that he could lay on his back.
After the incident five years ago, Gira didn't speak to him for a week. Xinala had been Gira's best friend, and the reason why he had mated with her. He enjoyed her company and was not blind to her affections for him. Gira had convinced him to take Xinala for a mate, knowing that he could take care of her better than any of the other wolves.
Kadell had held off taking a mate for so long, not sure if it was what he truly desired.
He always had an over keen interest in other males. He liked watching them, he liked challenging them. He knew perfectly well that he could hunt on his own but he chose to hunt with the back just for that reason.
Male love was forbidden because it held no reproductive means. The Fang Tribe was almost extinct and scattered across the mountain side. Their only chance for survival was as much reproduction as possible.
A nagging little voice popped up in his head. "But isn't there a law that says if you produce one female and one male child you are free to mate with whoever you want?"
Kadell rolled over on his side with a growl of annoyance. That rule was only created to encourage them to reproductively mate as much as possible. And besides, the rule only applied to males because they are the ones who are responsible for the sex of the child. The females didn't get the luxury of that law.
And that's biased so Kadell disapproved. End of story.
"I can't find a mate now so it doesn't even matter."
Kadell watched the snow, eyes picking out the individual ice particles. He didn't want another child. He already had one and the loss of it destroyed his soul.
"Nali..."
He had loved his son more than anything else in the world. After Nali was born he stopped wondering why he would rather watch other males than Xinala. Nali had made everything right. He had bonded his parents together under the common adoration for their son.
Kadell rolled over onto his back and scrubbed his face with ice cold hands. He couldn't replace Nali and he couldn't disgrace the memory of his deceased mate any longer. It was his fault both had died.
He failed to protect them.
He failed them.
He never loved Xinala.
Kadell roared, flipped over, and slammed his fist into the hard stone. He hated himself for that. He had led her to her death. He had led her under the false pretenses that he loved her...
Kadell collapsed onto the freezing stone, breathing heavily. The cat had to go. Liolyn couldn't stay there. He couldn't do this to the memory of his family.
***************
Liolyn sat in the bed with his clothes on. He wanted to be fully prepared for Kadell's decision.
If the wolf wanted him out then he would leave as quickly as possible.
If he wanted him to stay then fabulous, he half put on his clothes anyway.
Liolyn fidgeted nervously, his tail flicking back and forth. He didn't want to leave. He actually liked the wolf demon and he wasn't afraid to admit it. It was exhilarating and frightening at the same time. He hadn't had true feelings for someone he slept with in over half a century. And with that thought he was scared shitless at the thought of rejection.
He jumped to his feet the moment he heard crunching snow.
This was it. He was going to get his answer.
Whimper.
Kadell slowly walked into his cave, not looking at the bed. His eyes fell to the fire that the cat had started and... did he clean?
Kadell couldn't help the small smile that appeared. Leave it to a cat to be a neat freak. It looked like he cleaned the fire bit, organized the furs in a color coordinating pattern, and possibly changed the bed furs.
"You cleaned, didn't you?"
"I got bored."
Grey eyes flicked up to the cat demon. Liolyn was standing anxiously on the bed, looking at a lost at what to do. Kadell scanned over him and felt something grip him. He couldn't kick the cat out but he couldn't stay. Last night should never have happened. It was wrong and stupid and wrong...
"About last night..."
Kadell stared blankly at the fidgeting cat.
"I didn't... I didn't do anything wrong, did I?" Liolyn looked ready to bolt the moment Kadell answered.
Kadell didn't speak. He could tell the silence was making the cat nervous. And the fact that he was staring at him probably wasn't helping.
Liolyn clenched and unclenched his fists. "Fuck, let's just cut to the chase. Do you have an answer for me? Can I stay?"
Kadell met those almost pleading eyes. The cat didn't want to go. He didn't want him to go. But he would be in even deeper shit than he is in right now if the pack ever found out.
And yet...
"Do what you want."
Liolyn looked like Kadell had just punched him. "What?"
Kadell's eyes went to the flames. "You can stay if you still want to."
"If I want to or is it because you want me to."
Kadell growled but soon found himself tackled with an over excited cat demon on top of him. "Actually, I really don't care right now!" Liolyn kissed him fiercely, moaning and clawing at the wolf's clothes.
Kadell gave in without a word or without a fight.
He may have just signed his own death wish.