The Yiffing Man

Story by FluffyPony on SoFurry

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The entire production started from the idea of a rather randy fox in a white fantasy island tux. The fox's name was Frederick Dunz, and he invented the basis for the modern day equivalent of the yiffing girl game show.

Yiffing girl was a heavily popularized series about women and fur vixens of various species that were given a chance to be paroled early from prison if they accepted being hunted by over-endowed male furs to the eventual conclusion-yiff.

Hence, The Yiffing Girl. No one would ever call it the Yiffed Girl, for that was an indirect way of denoting rape. For many decades, ratings continued to hold firm as horse wood, but now, the late Jerry Dunz, grandson to the great Frederick, was no longer impressed. He had seen all forms of hot femmes being roughly plowed by the macro size males whom had contracts as hunters.

Every girl by every hunter in all ways. Boring. Jerry Dunz needed a new way to inspire the masses to excitement, and so he announced on June fifteenth his latest idea for a one-upper.

Even that time, it was highly controversial. Nobody, no fur, no human could have ever anticipated the strangeness of Jerry's new affair into eroticism, for at that June press conference, Jerry announced his bold plans for the new show;

The Yiffing Man

Darryl had been in a fur prison longer than he could remember. He had been left alone by all the other inmates because he had a reputation for being a vicious and quite mean fighter. He wasn't nobody's bitch. He didn't need friends, not in a fucked up place like this. The guards and the warden were all furs and didn't cut him any slack. Not that anyone would cut any slack for a convicted vix rapist.

"Lights out! Snuggle up to your boyfriends if you're scared of the dark!" Jeers a skunk guard rattling a ring of keys in a master lock system for the cells.

Then the lights were out, and he was forced to go to sleep or face a possible migration to the isolation area-without clothes. He'd almost give anything to get the hell out of here.

"I want a rapist!" Screams Jerry to his pair of attorneys, a wolf and a panther.

"What, Mr. Dunz?" Responds the panther with a confused shrug and adjustment of his red framed glasses.

They thought he was insane.

"The first show for The Yiffing Man. We'll have a human rapist and title it 'poetic justice.'"

"I see. He caused others pain, and now by irony we'll do the same to him." The wolf offers.

"Exactly! The audience and those watching on PayFur will go crazy for it!"

When his attorneys just stood there, Jerry bared his teeth in a menacing snarl.

"What the hell are you waiting for?! I said to get a rapist!" Jerry growls.

Darryl had a visit at the door of the cell he shared with a grizzled unshaven coyote, whom was brushing his pointed teeth over the steel sink. Darryl laughed to himself, thinking the coyote looked completely rabid.

"Darryl Gossan. You have an important visitor who is the legal representation for a popular pay-per-view television company." The bobcat guard jeers.

"Who would come to see me, pig?" Darryl grumbles, kicking the bars angrily.

"You know the routine. Wear the bling if you wanna see the king." The bobcat demands insultingly.

The bling was the handcuffs. The king was a reference to any visitor to the prison, because supposedly, all prisoners were practically unworthy to receive guests.

Seated in a small nearly unfurnished room save chairs, a table, his visitor, and two baton wielding guards. The panther across from him had a smooth graceful demeanor, wearing a powder blue suit, a closed brown suitcase laying flat on the table. The panther cleans his glasses.

"Mr. Gossan. Are you familiar with "The Yiffing Girl"?" He enquires with a soft purr.

Darryl fidgets excitedly, his hands tapping on the aluminum of the table, his eyes staring forward in disbelief.

"I Looove that show!" He jumps up a little, but a guard shoves him back down.

"It inspired me to do what I did to end up here!"

The panther casually scratches his right brow.

"Sir, you DO realize that there is a disclaimer not to emulate any portion of the show, or having the notion to be a hunter yourself?"

"I don't care! It was fucking awesome!"

"Umm...thank you for your support...I think."

This kicked all ass! The panther might ask him to be a hunter for the show!

"You're here to offer me a position as a hunter! It's about time! You only have those super-endowed studs doing it. It'll be great to show the fans how a human does it!"

The panther coughed to hide a laugh, a paw over his mouth to conceal a grin.

"Actually, I DO have a contract for you, but it isn't what you might have expected."

"Really?! Let's see it!"

The panther opened his case and handed over a piece of paper with some very legal sounding back-talk. Darryl read it, confused;

'The member(s) of said party are offered the opportunity to be released from incarceration pending review of entertainment significance as pertaining to The Yiffing Girl Ltd.'

"What the hell is this? What 'entertainment significance'?"

"Jerry Dunz, grandson of Frederick Dunz has created a new show, and has offered to make a deal with you through the state prison system."

"Okay, so I have to do something on T.V. and then I'll get out of jail free? Sounds fucking A! What do I need to do? Be a hunter?"

The panther wonders how to approach this delicately, when an idea struck him.

"You said you love our show. Who's your favorite hunter?"

"You shitting me? Lance Alot! He rocks!"

Ah, the ever popular white-haired, blue-eyed, equine-endowed, and graceful unicorn of Britain.

"How would you like to meet him in person?"

"What's the catch?"

"There's no catch. If you sign this, you both will be hanging out on our new aired show."

"Like a talk show about yiff?"

"Yeah, sure."

The panther smiles wryly. Pillow talk.

Darryl had been in wardrobe for hours being pampered and made up and dressed by some very hot fur ladies. He couldn't help his excitement and where his eyes went. This was probably the best day of his life. He gets out of prison, gets to be on T.V., gets to meet his hero face to face, and might even get some hot action!

"Ladies, gentlemen, and the rest of you." Mused Jerry the fox in his black suit with a playful wink.

"We have a special new show to kick off tonight. Keaton! Tell them about our contestant!"

Then a deep baritone voice on a loudspeaker came on.

"Sure thing, Jerry. Our contestant is named Darryl Gossan. He is a regular viewer of the show until he thought it would be fun to imitate it. His hobbies include making shivs, threatening fellow inmates, annnnnd, Aggravated Rape! His favorite hunter on the show is Lance Alot, and guess what folks? We're going to fulfill his dreams and yours in our new installment, The Yiffing Man: Poetic Justice!"

Jerry had to admit to himself there was some sick irony in allowing a fan to be raped by his hero, as the lights dimmed and multi-colored spotlights dotted the stage in intricate weaving patterns, as fur girls in hot little teddy's with their tails spouted from the back, began to file on the wood of the platform, dancing to the remix of Nine Inch Nails' "The Hand That Feeds." redone as K.O. Bad Ass Big Room Anthem. God, that was an intriguing song! Mist floated over the stage, and even though Jerry choreographed the whole thing, it was still fun to watch.

Darryl paused in putting on a green long-sleeve shirt, hearing the loud echoing bass of music rumble the walls and the little study mirror. He think he heard, 'chew until it bleeds' for some reason. The pants were a little weird. They felt like something he'd wear to bed.

Nearby, the panther, wearing large headphones with a mic attached, nodded, declaring;

"Five minutes to show-time."

"What do I say? I'm nervous."

"Lance Alot is more of the quiet type. Don't worry about what to say."

"If you really think so."

Darryl was escorted by a fine complement of furry chicks in those hot Yiffing Girl thong bodysuits. He on the other hand felt oddly like a sleepwalker in his green pants and shirt of super light material. Nevertheless, if this was how he was supposed to be in costume, Darryl would do it. He might even have been hired to do a little comedy; 'Lance Alot and me'

Jerry spots him and motions him impatiently over to his side. Darryl jogs excitedly over.

"Mr. Dunz! I love your show! It is great to be here!" Then Darryl sweeps his eyes at the thong bodysuit clad fur girls on the stage dancing to some rock song rendition or remix or some shit like that. Foxes, skunks, mares, bitches, pussy cats, and various other species as varied as leaves in Autumn.

"I'm glad to hear that, Mr. Gossan. Tonight, you are the star on my newest show. It is heavily related to The Yiffing Girl, except...hmmm...Lance Alot! Come out for us, please!"

Immediately, the vixens filed out, the music stopped, and was replaced by the song "Clocks." by Coldplay.

Darryl hears the heavy sound of hooves on the wood of the stage, as a giant male unicorn steps out from a nearby hallway. White flower petals float down from above. Lance Alot is dressed in his costume; a coat of silvery plate armor, an elongated helmet hiding his face, his long foot and a half spiral horn bursting from the brow of the helmet, leaving a little slit for his blue eyes to peer out. Tonight, they were wide with lust. Lance Alot also bore a great black lance in one hand, the tip severally blunted down, and his wavy white horse-like tail was long enough to drag on the floor behind. The unicorn immediately pierces the black painted lance through a cardboard caricature of someone's bared rear in a bending position.

Then in showy flair, the equine spins to face Darryl and Jerry.

"Knave! I shall claim yore arse! By thy honour, no mate shall escape thy lust!" The unicorn rumbles.

Darryl stares in horror, as colored lights bounce off the chrome steel costume of Lance Alot. But no lights can hide that horny stare, a stare of fierce undeniable urges.

"Wait, WHAT?!"

Jerry laughs cruelly.

"We've given you the privilege to get to know Lance Alot, your hero, better than most others."

The audience cheers with applause and some laughter.

"...Home, home, where I wanted to go..." The song declares.

That's where Darryl wanted to be about now, even if it WAS prison!

Jerry lifts a mic to his mouth.

"Those playing at home can place a bet with our PayTo line for when Lance Alot finally Ssss-Lays 'the dragon'! For those playing in the audience, place your votes and win prizes! Now, Darryl, get ready to run!"

Behind, a wide black door opened, revealing a darkly lit corridor of mirrors arranged in a version of Daedalus' maze, Daedalus being the architect for the maze of Crete, where lay trapped the minotaur.

Darryl was about to do just that, when the unicorn caught him in his gaze.

"Knave Darryl. Do make this sporting for thyself."

Darryl felt like screaming, remembering Lance Alot's massive eighteen inches of bulging pink cock. Once good for rendering females apart, now would tear Darryl to agony screaming tattered pieces!

Okay, no one ever died on the show, as E.M.T.'s were always ready to step in, but still, it was a scary thought for a unicorn to viciously fuck him, and his idol no less!

And all on Pay-Per-View T.V.! What could be more demeaning?!

Darryl charged into the maze with the yelling and applause at his back, as the music change again, now playing Marilyn Manson's version/remake of "Tainted Love."

"Let's give him ten minutes before we send our good knight wishes! Who says Lance Alot will conquer in half an hour? Any takers?"

Several furs in the giant audience raised paws in response.

"Ah, and in an hour?"

Still more hazarded guesses.

"In an hour-thirty?"

No one wanted to guess, assuming the unicorn had this job down well, after twenty or so seasons working on the show.

"Very well, let's see what happens, then."

Darryl ran hard, dodging through narrow cornered walls of tall reflective glass, heavy mist swirling about his sandals. It was nearly too dark to see, as narrow beams of light pierced through the dark from above like moon light. From the darkness came the deep echoing voice of the unicorn.

"Knave! Ye shall not deny thy conquest forever! I will find thee, and thee will wish I had not!" Roars the equid with a fierce laugh.

"You won't claim me! I'll fight your horsie ass if I have to!"

"Nay! Fear not! I shall take thee like I would any slut in thy employ! Feel gracious for thou honour!"

"I challenge you horse, I mark you. Be warned, for I WILL fight, and, I WILL win!"

"Bold words, sirrah. We must find one another before such a tourney may commence. I hope this boldness is not vain, when you spy the lance I bear at my waist!"

"I shall yield to no animal. I shall yield to no male. I shall yield to no one!"

"Bold words indeed, vagrant. Enjoy sitting down, while you can!"

Darryl cringed at the visualization that implied.

Jerry smiles, watching the various T.V.'s bearing the unedited footage of the contestant, and the hunter, both running through the maze of mirrors as they insulted each other. Brilliant, really. With femmes, there was more screaming involved, but with male prisoners, and the animated discourse, this might prove to provide a psychological aspect to the show.

In fact, though Darryl did not realize it, his voice was confusing the hunter! Never had Lance Alot been forced to deal with so much echoes in his little randy safari adventure! The unicorn might take half a day to find the human, and that prolonging of the ever delightful event would only excite those watching further.

Yes, Jerry had unwittingly discovered a way to outwit the hunter's efforts despite their mass of experience for this type of stalking. The longer it lasted, the longer he had the audience's attention. Ratings could now be as hard and big as a bull elephants' raging cock!

"Get 'im Lance Alot!" Someone in the audience screams.

Everyone uproariously cheers.

Darryl had been walking around forever. Maybe in circles, not that he could tell. There was no way to orient himself.

"I'll find ye, knave! And I shall take the pleasure of introducing both the lances I bear!" The unicorn declares with a great rumble.

You have to find me, first, and I won't take this lying down!

It had been three hours since Jerry had started the first Yiffing Man show, and since then, he had kept the audience busy with the dancing vixens when the pace in the maze slackened a bit, when an idea came to him.

"Hello, folks! Since we did not envision this hunt to take so long, we will reopen the voting terminals for further guesses to win prizes!" Jerry declares.

Just like that, with their cheers and shouting, he knew he had the audience's loyalty. He was wildly popular and could do this show for eternity, if he wanted to. Then, still more brilliant ideas struck him! This show, usually the Yiffing Girl, went by so fast with just one hunter stalking, it was rarely wise to add more to the equation, but now...

"Well, we have a problem. Our little randy uni is having himself quite the headache in trying to find his prize! Let's take a vote on which hunter we should send to give Lance Alot some assistance!"

Immediately, the audience flooded with requests.

"Captain fuck-machine!" A shire stallion.

"Macho Master!" A super vicious gray wolf.

"The Dominator!" A bull elephant. Ouch!

"Yes, I believe I heard Captain fuck-machine! Ladies and gentlefurs, today, you are witness to history. Not only have I invented a variation of Yiffing Girl, I have also created the concept for the daily double; two hunters in one show! However, Lance Alot still gets first dibs on our contestant!"

"Captain fuck-machine! You're wanted in wardrobe. Jerry just announced his plans for the daily double." Replies the wolf attorney with his own set of headphones, peering into Captain's personal lounge area, where he had a rather slutty filly firmly planted on his massive shaft of shire meat, her expression set in relaxed bliss, almost sleeping.

"The WHAT?! Doesn't Jerry realize that the show wouldn't last very long if we did two hunters at once?!" The shire protests.

"Jerry disagrees. Lance Alot has been hunting the contestant for almost four hours."

"No fucking way! Is he slipping?"

"The echoes confuse him, and that's how you stalk, with ears, right?"

"Well, why me? You know I'm not overly happy to do guys!" He replies, motioning to the small filly snug on his rod.

"The audience and your contract demand it. You are open to lawsuit if you break your agreement."

"My fans won't like you suing me."

"Your fans also won't like seeing you deny their request."

"Damn! I'll just grin and bear it."

"Well, you should be glad you're not the one who'll need a hemorrhoid donut for the next week."

"So true. I'll be out of my dressing room in ten." Then he nudges the dreamily weary little slut on his tool.

"Honey, please wake up. Big Daddy has to do his job." The shire whispers gently into one of her funnel ears.

She shrugs tiredly, her chestnut fur coat shivering slightly. She looks into his big brown eyes, laying her tiny delicate hoof-let hands on his massive blue roan colored chest.

"Must you lover?" She squeals in horny protest.

Captain puts a giant digit to her mouth to quiet her, but instead she takes the finger in her muzzle and sucks on it.

"Shhh, babe, I'll be back, and I'll enjoy you like no male has ever before."

Then Captain slowly lifts her little form from his mass of hard equine cock with a sloppy eruption of sex fluids from her now unplugged cunt, setting her softly nearby on the bed he'd been sitting on during the tryst.

"Hello everyone! When you think, don't ask, don't tell, this is one mean bastard you DON'T want to ask!" Jerry announces.

The song, Twisted Transistor" by Korn plays on the speakers, as from behind a curtain marches a blue roan colored shire dressed like a drill sergeant in camo pants, a black tank top, a short cut mane, a pair of chrome dog tags about his thick muscular neck, and a long baton affixed to his belt.

"Thanks to your courteous requests, I introduce Captain fuck-machine!"

"Hoooah!" Grunts the paramilitary dressed horse, saluting, tearing the baton from his waist and thrusting it through a caricature of a human mouth, making an enormous gaping hole. Whew! That's what Jerry called 'deep throat'! . "That's gonna be my dick, next!" The great stallion barks.

"Do you have anything to say to the audience, Captain?" Jerry asks.

"Yeah! You don't wanna be the private in front of my privates!"

The audience laughs in response.

The maze had him going all over the place. The obscurity left Darryl tired, ready to give up. He didn't know how long he'd been running around, but he was tired, hungry, and sweating from all pores like a wrung-out sponge.

Suddenly, as he turned a corner, he slammed into something hard and shiny. He thought it was a mirror until he saw the ferocious blue eyes in the dark.

"Ye have given thee the greatest challenge I've faced as a hunter, but now, thy body is thy prize!" Then the unicorn takes his dark lance and crashes it down hard on the crown of Darryl' s head, leaving him sprawled there on the mist shrouded cement floor.

Jerry watches, stunned, as the unicorn on the little t.v. set lifts the small human over his great shoulders, carrying Darryl to the center of the maze, the bedchamber and dungeon.

"Well, this IS unexpected! We'll be back after a word from our sponsors!"

On the t.v.'s arrayed about the audience comes a visual for a stallion weight-lifting at a gym. The horse gets up, smiling with not only large muscles, but quite an endowment as well.

"Hi there! Tired of being the little guy on the block? Well, I used to be like you until I discovered MacroPlus supplements. MacroPlus supplements provide an all around enlargement of the male anatomy. I use it all the time, and my mate couldn't be happier! Ain't that right, honey?"

A dark brown naked mare comes from the edge of the screen and smiles at the camera in a movie star way, hugging the big sweaty stallion.

"That's right, lover! Too bad all randy studs don't use MacroPlus!"

"That's right! Please give it a try. You're mate will be glad you did!"

Then he flexes his arm, and they hug and kiss while the disclaimer is recited by a male announcer.

"MacroPlus supplement should not be used by females, young boys, or males with heart conditions, diabetes or urinary diseases caused by sexually transmitted diseases. Those who are herms or young teens should consult a doctor before using MacroPlus supplement. MacroPlus supplement available by prescription only. Earlier trials have revealed possible hernia and severe headache. Follow dosing instruction carefully, and if you obtain an erection lasting longer than four hours, consult medical assistance."

The stallion smiles at the camera, his chin wet with spit, as the mare proceeds to suck on his blackish pink horse cock.

"Try MacroPlus supplement today."

Then he looks down at the mare servicing him.

"You'll never regret it!" He declares with a boisterous laugh.

The next commercial comes on. A lovely golden retriever female in a navy blue suit and skirt set is holding a microphone and speaking for a public announcement.

"Hi everyone. Some of you might know me as the yiffy porn star from doggiestyle 4, mutts and butts, or throw me a boner! I'm not here to talk about my movies, I'm here to talk on behalf of E.T.O.Y.H., the Ethical Treatment Of Yiffy Humans. The sad fact is most humans are unable to keep up with their furry lovers. So please, slow things down for 'em, because they're great to have around, but they are still adapting to our super-sexed world, and it's frighteningly easy to rape your non-fur lover and take advantage if your not careful. If you would, donations to E.T.O.Y.H. would be greatly appreciated and tax-deductible. The number is on the bottom of the screen. Thank you again, from Cindy!"

The last commercial featured a fox vixen trying hard to fuck herself with a light blue dildo. She tries in vain, but she just can't seem to get too far.

Then a female announcer comes on.

"Has this ever happened to you? Have you ever experienced difficulty or pain with insertion? Our new product Slick-Ryde TM Lubricant might be what you're looking for! Slick-Ryde is long-lasting, water soluble, and some lubricants may even be available with spermicide. Slick-Ryde available for purchase at most sex shops and pharmacies. What are you waiting for? Get some Slick-Ryde, and get back on the horse!"

Darryl wakens with his skull aflame, the unicorn stood before him, no longer in his armor, but instead wearing only a smile.

"Well, knave, ye rise at last!" The unicorn muses.

Darryl looks around, spying another popular hunter of the show.

"What the hell are you doing here?!" Darryl exclaims at Captain.

The shire seizes him roughly to his feet by his hair.

"Fuck up, maggot! We're goin' back to basic training. I'm gonna Looove teachin' ya 'bout my gun! You're gonna fire it down your bitch throat!"

"What?!"

The shire slaps him hard across the face, making his cheeks burn from pain and embarrassment. Not in prison was he someone's bitch, no that would be merciful, where there were no witnesses. Here, his humiliation would be available on DVD and FurTube!

"Can you hear me, bitch? Say, 'yes Sir!'" The shire demands, shaking Darryl helplessly by his unkempt prison locks.

God his head hurt! Darryl swings his arm out vainly in a punch. The shire dodges, annoyed.

"Bitch has some fight. Teach him some etiquette, porny corn!" Then with that, Darryl is shove toward the nude white equid with the soft, yet intense sapphire eyes.

The unicorn kicks feet out from under him, catching the man by his chin before he thumps against the cement floor of a darkly lit room with a bed and what looked to be a torture chamber. Darryl stared pleadingly into the unicorns' eyes, almost begging.

"Be calm knave. We shall not be breaking you in until we have ourselves some jolly entertainment. Captain fuck-machine, hand me that leash on the far wall."

The shire looks back briefly, tearing a black leather cord from a utility hook affixed to a sandy-beige wall, tossing to land at Darryl's feet.

"A dog we'll have to fuck today?" The shire offers, a cruel grin affixed to his muzzle.

"Nay, an impertinent jester whom has plied his discourtesy to his lords."

The shire laughs, taking out his baton and taking a few test swats at the air.

"Jesters are flogged for such offense, are they not, my good knight?"

"Aye. Lay it across his back. Soft at first. We'll give him the idea of it before becoming rough."

Darryl squeals smartly as the baton snaps his back hard. It felt nothing like the beatings he experienced by the guards in prison.

"I said to start soft, ignoramus!" Lance Alot roars.

"You do it your way, I'll do it mine. God, maybe this daily double shit wasn't such a good idea, after all!" The shire wryly offers in lieu of apology.

"We do what our contracts tell us to. I'm a vain prissy fucker pretending to be on an elegant medieval power trip. You're a tight-ass military officer in charge of vicious whore training scenarios sighs Why'd we get involved in this shit?"

"The money's good, and we get to fuck all the hot jail bitches we want!"

The unicorn appraises the human on the leash in amusement.

"Speaking of, how do you feel about this one?"

"Personally? I don't fuck males. But Jerry puts the bread on the table, so I ain't exactly complaining. It's better to fuck one or two men than put in forty hours a week on a job that really sucks."

"Hmmm. I actually find some men cute." The unicorn replies.

The shire gives a cruel laugh.

"Hah! A unicorn WOULD say that! Do you want to marry our contestant?"

"Not so fast, Captain! I'm actually quite flattered. Think about it; imitation is the greatest form of flattery, and how'd he end up in prison? He got in trouble for imitating some of the things I'D done on this show! And how did he end up on the show? Jerry got a new idea. Don't you see? It's fate that united me with my most sincere admirer!" The unicorn declares in dreamy wonder.

"So you're cutting bitch boy here some slack 'cause he appreciates your work? Bad form old friend. We're professional studs paid to do a job!"

"Just you wait, some man will say, 'Captain fuck-machine inspired me to do pornos', and you'll be visibly touched!"

"Keep dreaming, you pillow biting dildo-head!"

"Hrrmp! You'll see."

Darryl could not believe the two hunters were arguing amongst each other, and not about yiff rights, either!

Jerry could not believe this shit! The hunters were not fucking the contestant, they weren't doing anything but arguing! He didn't have microphones to go with the cameras, but he assumed it was because they were arguing over who got first cuts and who got sloppy seconds.

Maybe this daily double thing wasn't so great after all, unless he had the hunters retrained to cooperate in pairs and trios. Strange though, how they started demeaning the subject and suddenly stopped in the middle.

And he could see the audience getting restless, negative whispers reaching his ears. These furs did not pay a hundred bucks to watch two nude males conduct a debate! Jerry turns on his private mic, telling the attorneys to find out what the hell was going on, when he belayed that, seeing the two horses on the t.v. had finally worked it out and got back to work.

Good! He didn't want to think of the massive influx of refunds he'd have to coordinate. These horny bastards paid to watch a human get fucked hard, and that was what they'd get-

Or two former hunters were going to be looking for new jobs.

"Are you ready?" Asks Captain.

"Is he?" The unicorn motions to the human subservient on all fours before them.

The shire slaps the back of Lance Alot's head.

"Ouch! Hey!"

"Do your fucking job! Don't ask the victim how he wants to be raped!" Captain roars.

"Okay, right. Better to ask forgiveness than permission, they say."

Then Darryl cringes as the unicorn tears the light green pants from his body with an audible rip noise, throwing him off balance, and leaving his bum cold and exposed in the air-conditioned maze.

"Let's make the drapes match the carpet?"

And with that, Captain boldly tore off Darryl's sleep shirt, the article briefly attached by the collar before being separated from the shivering human.

"Aww...little slut is cold!" Captain observed.

Lance Alot strokes his length of semi-erect rubbery shaft in one hand while supporting it in the other.

"I got something right here that might warm him up!"

Captain gives a roar of laughter in response.

Darryl can't help but shiver, and not because of the cold, when he sees the wide girth of uni-cock before him. Lance Alot was quite the bold fuck, with a pure pink engorged and slanted cock-head ready to spear those placed before it. Or perhaps the unicorn bore a great rapier between his white fuzzy legs, where rested two giant fuzz covered testicles like a pair of white peaches. Eighteen inches of stabbing unsated flesh. Madness!

"How would you like me to heat you up? Mouth or the ass?" Lance Alot offers.

"None of the above." Darryl whispers in disbelief.

"The ass, then, Lovely one. And I will enjoy you thoroughly like a bitch in heat."

"Please, no..."

Darryl makes a motion as if to get up, to run away, to escape, but Captain tugs hard on the end of the leash, strangling him.

"Service the master, slut!" Captain fuck-machine yells.

Lance Alot laughs, a lilting beautiful noise, his eyes alight in mischief, as he travels to Darryl's rear.

"And such a fine bum we have, too. Wouldn't you say, Captain?" The unicorn muses, digging a finger lewdly through the crack of Darryl's ass crack, licking the smell off with obvious pleasure.

"Yes, a bitch. He's unworthy of being a mare in standing heat. He fidgets too much."

"Nonsense, I'd fidget were I to have this monster before me."

Captain gives Darryl a hard resounding slap on the ass, making him whimper.

"What are you waiting for?" Captain muses.

Lance Alot gets on his knees, placing his chest over the humans' back and rubbing the human with his soft furred body.

"Patience, Captain. Prison whores are a dime a dozen, but rarely do I receive the entertainment of a man."

"You're gonna enjoy him slow!" Captain declares, incredulous.

The musky unicorn, with his cinnamon-like masculine odor, proceeds to savor the feel of Darryl's hot flesh against his hide, sighing.

"Like my own teddy bear."

Lance Alot crooks a hand under him, seizing Darryl's limp dick and ballsack in his fuzzy palm, the organs warm as sun-bathed stone. Then the beautiful equid leans a little over, nibbling Darryl's ear softly, then raking his teeth along Darryl's shoulder blades delicately, displaying the omnipotent equine power he could exert were he less merciful.

"I claim you slut. Do not protest, for you will regret it."

Then Lance Alot squeezes the delicate organs in his one paw, making Darryl squeal out in pain, inadvertently bucking like a wild un-broken horse.

"There, you see? He IS like a receptive mare! The only thing he didn't do was kick!"

The unicorn goes back to his delight, kneading the man's genitals still, in his one paw, the other reached around his waist to rub his teats and ribs with powerful, near orgasmic motions of malleable steely flesh.

"I've never known one as you, human, who I find such passion in, I dare not rush. I'll take you like my filly, but not before making you scream for release."

Darryl had never been treated so expertly like this. He'd never known a bisexual equine could have such experience.

The unicorn rubs the tip of Darryl's limp dick between thumb and forefinger, spreading the hot precum all over the head with slippery abandon. Darryl shivers, feeling absolutely fulfilled-and helpless-when the unicorn suddenly stops.

"No mare can cum before the stallion. That is the rule."

Then Darryl feels the unicorn stop, dropping his genitals, and instead seizing the human in fierce embrace about the chest.

But Darryl's mouth is open in horror as the unicorn shoves his pink dick at his rear passage without moderation, the head thumping slickly against his butt or through his thighs up against his belly, trying unsuccessfully to find his shitter.

Then the slick thing slides through him like agony-laced despair, destroying the harmony of his body as the pink lance parts both rectal rings of his anus and is shoved neatly up, stretching out his insides like a fleshy bulging enema.

"Hey, look at that! He's inviting me in!" Captain declares, going around to Darryl's front and dropping his camouflage pants, displaying his hard black stallion cock in a one-gun salute, the massive engorged head leaking hot juicy pre like a sprinkler faucet.

"Hooah!" And with that, Captain fuck-machine rams half a foot of plump horse dick down Darryl's protesting and gagging throat, choking him cruelly.

"Service my gun, private. It's in need of a place to discharge!" Then Captain thrust another half foot unyielded through the man's slack uncomprehending jaws.

Darryl could not believe three feet of giant shire rod was viciously being introduced to his throat and stomach!

Darryl cringes as the unicorn crashes the full length of his equine endowment right into his colon, then proceeds to fuck him in sporadic jerks of his hips, his tail flagging with each pump into the tight filly he was claiming.

Then Captain's huge draft cock stops, reaching Darryl's stomach with a soft and odd thump to his insides. He would have puked several times from the gagging sensation of horse meat sliding along his Larynx if it weren't for that very arm-sized proportion of horseflesh plugging up his throat.

"Ohhhh!" Moans Lance Alot. "He's got such a sweet and tight arse!"

"And his throat is heaven. If I were gay, I'd fuck this little palfrey whore like he was a filly kept in my stable!"

"Uh! Uh! Ride 'em horsie! God! Tight little asshole!" The unicorn ecstatically screams out.

The shire, whom is more collected, begins to line Darryl's mouth with slivering silky dick, throbbing wildly, excited, ready to spray gallons of special shire seed down the human's under-sized stomach.

"Heheh. Yummy, yummy, yummy, I've got dick in my tummy!" The shire teases.

The unicorn laughs gaily, inadvertently crashing, collapsing heavily on top of the contestant. Captain's dick is savagely ripped from Darryl's mouth as he is shoved hard against the cold concrete of the floor, his arms and legs splayed out. The unicorn is still in him, but now Darryl feels the pressure of the equid ever more intense and hotly than before, like Lance Alot were fevered, or burning brightly like a uni star.

"See what you made me do!" The unicorn giggles out, licking Darryl's right ear affectionately.

"Get a room, you two!" Captain jeers.

"Not till I fuck him up, and I don't mean with my hands!"

Darryl tried to swallow, tried to flex his mouth from the previous fellatio assault of the massive draft equine. His throat felt like shit. It might be cracked in a few places. He might need some serious throat lozenges after that little affair. Of course, the only thing little about said affair was the duration.

"Want to finish what we started, filly?"

Darryl tries to speak, to protest, to plead, but only a raspy croak could be uttered.

The unicorn laughs.

"You left him speechless!"

"And I took his breath away." The shire countered.

They share a bout of hysterics for awhile before Lance Alot continues his crusade, but this time a little gentler. With Lance Alot snuggly in Darryl's puckered hole, the unicorn lays his limbs across the humans' in weary bliss, wiggling inside Darryl the slightest bit to provide them both pleasure, equine sweat cold on Darryl's back and the unicorns' chest, sandwiched between like a thin filmy layer of salty grease.

Darryl never knew being someone's bitch-no, mare-ever felt like this. His ass loved it, for some "queer" reason. After running around in a maze for the day, being plowed by a shire in his mouth, and being a unicorns' good Knight wishes, Darryl could not contain the weariness he had at the moment, nor did he try to-there would be plenty of time later to talk with his idol. After all, he was Lance Alot's special filly!

As Jerry listened to the wonderful music of a well entertained-and endowed-audience. (you couldn't walk more than a dozen feet before seeing an audience member with either a wet crotch {females}, or a tent popped to go camping yiff style! {males}) When he saw the human and the unicorn go to the latter's dressing room for some further "acting lessons", Jerry had another wonderful gem of a show to announce next season when fervor for The Yiffing Man died down. His idea was loosely based on something he'd seen another network do. Jerry would rush to coordinate the new show for next season with his production staff. He was sure he could now have ratings equal only in size to a humpback whale dick by releasing this new and wonderful work of entertainment!

"Yes, let us get started on the newest revolution in entertainment, after all, Lance Alot and Darryl Gossan will only be satisfied with being boyfriends for so long."

He could see it in bold, purple, bulging balloon-like letters.

'Jerry Dunz, grandson of Frederick Dunz now introduces a special show. A show of love, dedication, loyalty, and vicious jealousy. May I now pronounce you horny and yiffy in our first season installment of,

"Who wants to marry a Macro stud?".'