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Smokey and Patty By Strega

"If I were going to eat you," the bear in the ranger hat said reasonably, 

"We wouldn't be having this conversation." "Or it'd be a lot more muffled," said a smirking raccoon wearing a complete ranger uniform, down to the U.S. Forest Service patches. "You're not helping, Rick," said the bear. "Well, what happens now, then?" said Tim, who wasn't going anywhere with a heavy pawlike hand on his shoulder and who very much wanted this meeting to not end with a belch. "You caught me, I'm guilty. Just call the cops already." "I warned you the last time, and the time before that not to steal from the campground," the bear growled. "You're lucky that camper isn't hurt any worse. Even so, if I weren't on a diet..." "Some people you just can't reason with," Ranger Rick chittered. "You might as well call Patty down in the valley and get a cop car up here." The grizzly bear in pants, belt and hat shot the better-dressed furry ranger a look. "That," he said with a pause, "Sounds like a pretty good idea. Now you," he growled with a glance at Tim, "You stay right in that corner while I make a call."

He didn't make a call. Instead he pulled out a smart phone and started texting. Maybe he had an app just for talking to cops? In any case, there wasn't a handy window to leap out of and he wasn't going to get past the 500-pound bear leaning against the door. Maybe he could jump Rick, who he probably outweighed two to one, but the raccoon had sharp fangs and causing trouble seemed like a very bad idea in a room with a bear who could say "Thief? What thief?" on the phone while waiting for the bulge in his midsection to go away. Tim stayed in the chair like the good criminal he was.

"Patty will meet me to pick him up," Smokey said a couple of minutes later.

"Well, that fixes that, then," Rick chittered as Tom found himself hoisted to his feet by a large bear paw. "Tell her I said 'Hi',"

There was something funny about the raccoon's voice, as though he were repressing the urge to say something else. Tim shrugged. He wasn't an expert at reading anthropomorphic animal expressions, after all.

Normally the campground would be closed this late in the year, but winter was unseasonably behind schedule and despite the nip in the air and the dusting of snow on the mountains there were still a few tents and camping vehicles in view. Tim quickly wished for more than a T-shirt and jeans as Smokey turned him away from the little ranger office and marched him down a dirt trail into the woods.

"I thought you said the cop lady was coming to pick me up," Tom complained. "There aren't any roads this way. If you were going to eat me why didn't you just -"

"Patty doesn't drive a car," the bear said from behind him. At no point did the powerful paw move from his shoulder. The one time Tim leaned forward a bit, the grip tightened until the tips of strong curved claws threatened to sink in. "She gets along just fine without one."

"What, does she ride a horse?" Tim asked as they left the woods for a meadow. He drew up short with a gasp when he saw the mountain lion.

"No, but she's the size of one," Smokey said with a chuckle, and he wasn't kidding. Patty, if that was she, was far larger than any cat he'd seen even in a zoo. Standing she'd be over five feet tall at the shoulder, and there must be a ton of muscle under that tawny fur.

The huge cat looked up from the sort of self-cleaning any cat does, with one hind leg hoisted up over her ear, and made what could only be a smile. "Good morning, Smokey."

"It is, isn't it?" the bear said, and reached out with his free hand to scratch her behind the ears. Her eyes squinched shut in obvious pleasure, and it turned out that even a one-ton cougar can purr.

The cat was twice the mass of Tim and Smokey together, at least, but the bear wasn't the least bit intimidated. Tim was another matter, shrinking against the brown wall of fur behind him with the horrible certainty that he was about to learn things about big cat digestive systems that he'd never wanted to know. If she'd been wearing a saddle maybe he would be all right, but she wasn't. He was instantly sure she'd be carrying him another way, a way he wouldn't like at all.

"And who do we have here," the cat purred as she unfolded from washing herself. A tail longer that Tim was tall and thicker than his thigh stretched lazily out to balance her as she rose smoothly to her padded paws. Her eyes were vivid green, the round pupils contracted in the slanting sunlight.

"Just a little problem," the bear growled as he grabbed Tim by the belt and shirt. Tim yelped as he was hoisted from his feet, kicking and thrashing and completely helpless in the big bear's grip. "One I could use your help getting rid of, as I mentioned earlier."

"Well we can't have you stuck with a problem," the big cat said with a whiskery smile. As Smokey started the backswing that would send Tim into her maw she didn't yawn, though. Instead she turned in place with a neat placement of padded paws and swung her tail to the side.

"I'd say you were about to go where no man has gone before," Smokey said, "But that would be a lie."

"Wait," Tim said, but there was no stopping the forward swing that sent him in beneath that furry tail. He had just an instant to see the brown pucker and the star-shaped pink sex below it before his head connected with the latter. There was a juicy thump and everything went dark.

"What in the world," Tim thought in the instant before the strong paws gripping his hips gave him another shove. Wet flesh slid smoothly under and around him as the bear pushed him into the big cat's pussy almost to the navel. As the bear's claws scraped his back he was suddenly afraid Smokey was going to rip his pants off and rape him right on the spot. With his arms trapped to his sides by an oversized cat's snatch there wouldn't be a thing he could do about it.

That wasn't what happened. He could feel the cougar stretched tight around him, her distended sex stretched over his upper arms like a snake swallowing a rat and the pressure of what must be her pelvis against his upper back. A shudder ran through the flesh surrounding him and he felt as much as heard the cougar let out a long yowl of pleasure. The wet tunnel around him gripped down in a shivering seizure, muscles worked beneath the skin and suddenly he was being sucked in.

Tim was still for a moment of utter shock as the big cat's sex began to consume him. Then a kick of protest as Smokey's paws fell away from his hips, followed by all-out squirming struggle as the sucking pressure of the enormous mountain lion's pussy pulled him in.

It didn't stop her. He wasn't even sure it slowed her down. The yowling cat arched her back, then stretched out, her thick tail lashing his protruding legs as her rippling sex pulled him in. It was the opposite of what should be happening. Even if he'd guessed her sex could stretch over his whole body, things were supposed to come -out- of a vagina, not go in. Yet despite his increasingly muffled struggle, confined as he was by the muscular walls of her snatch, he was sucked further and further into the cat.

His face soon emerged into a looser space that was hopefully her womb. The alternative was her stomach, which he really didn't want to visit. This was bad enough! Muscular contractions in the walls of what should be rights be a birth canal continued to go against nature and pull him in, expelling more of him into the elastic folds of her womb.

When only his calves and feet protruded from her snatch, the stimulation of a squirming victim in her sex was finally too much. He felt the long shudder as she came, heard and felt the screech of joy and throb of pressure as her sex clenched down in orgasm. Her snatch clamped down, and like a wet bar of soap gripped too hard he squirted free. Unfortunately, with most of him already inside her, he squirted in the wrong direction, and his feet followed the rest of him in a sudden slide through her sex. She had successfully swallowed him whole with her pussy.

"I don't believe it," Tim muttered. The remorseless squeeze of her sex had pushed him entirely into her womb, where he lay curled up in what could only be called a fetal position. He felt the droop his weight made in her abdomen, a bulge that in any other situation would signal pregnancy. Instead she had a quite live and unhappy human in here, one sucked into the mutant cat's sex entirely against his will.

The now very relaxed cat purred her contentment, which he felt perfectly clearly from the inside. He was much less satisfied with the situation. On the one hand, at least he wasn't in someone's stomach. On the other, it was hot and wet and powerfully smelly in here, and he wasn't sure how long the air would last. With what little room he had to move he made his displeasure known.

"Enough already!", Tim shouted, and jabbed an elbow into the wall. Droplets of cougar goo splattered his face as thumped the womb wall again. "You've had your fun! Let me out!"

There wasn't a lot of room to work with, and he couldn't hit her very hard, but he felt her shift around to stare at her own belly. At least she knew he wasn't a big fan of the situation.

It was then he realized that he had a problem. More properly he had -another- problem. Besides the heat and confinement and sweltering humidity and the smell, the amount of liquid sloshing around his knees was increasing rapidly. The walls were sweating copious volumes of the stuff, thick and warm and clinging.

And corrosive, he realized as his skin began to tingle. He wasn't in a stomach, as far as he could tell, but this sure seemed like it would do the job. In the tight confines of the big cougar's womb he began to struggle in earnest. It was either get out now or be cougar chow. He knew which outcome he'd prefer.

*****

"First there was another bear who wanted to be Smokey. He was about two-thirds my size and had cobbled up a bad copy of my uniform. When he wouldn't leave the camp I clobbered him over the head with my shovel and swallowed him. That by itself would have been fine..."

"Mm-hmm," purred the big cat curled around him where he sat, and she gave his unsheathed cock a long slow lick with her sandpapery tongue. Smokey groaned, then continued his story.

"But no sooner had I coughed up twenty pounds of wet bear fur and visited the outhouse for the tenth time when Rick had a problem. There were these three bikers who were harassing him."

"I like Rick," Patty said. "He's cute." The bulge in her abdomen twitched, and they both gave it an amused look. Tim hadn't quite thrown in the towel, though it must be obvious to him now that he wasn't getting out of her with a whole (or undigested) skin.

"He suggested I call you about this guy. He's a smart coonie, and he likes you, but you make him nervous," Smokey growled. "You could snap him up in one mouthful."

"So could you," the cougar said with a giggle. "Or I could snap you up."

"All of me I want you to swallow, you already are," Smokey said, and scratched behind her ears. The big cat's muzzle obligingly dipped, and a foot of thick bear shaft disappeared beneath her chops. Even he hadn't been able to satisfy Patty the usual way, but luckily Tim had come along and volunteered for the job.

"Rick tricked the three into sneaking into my cabin through an air vent, and all I had to do was stand there with my mouth open. So, a bear and three grown men in a week. I put on a hundred pounds from two big meals, and the vet said I had to go on a diet."

"'Diet'," said the cougar after disgorging his cock, "Is a word I avoid like the plague."

"You don't live in a cabin and eat prepared food," Smokey growled, and ruffled her neckfur as she licked his balls. His pants lay nearby in an untidy heap, leaving him with just his ranger's hat. "Which I do most of the time. You are a lithe and powerful forest cat who just happens to like sucking people into her pussy."

"I was always the biggest one," Patty mused. "Much larger than even the big males. They still courted me, of course, and one day after trying his best to satisfy me Redfur stuck his muzzle in to lick me out. I miss him," she said sadly. "I didn't know what was happening, but it felt so good, and by the time I recovered he'd been sucked in and smothered."

"And digested," Smokey said.

"Eventually," the big cat said, and gave his cock another raspy lick. "I don't know how it works, whether it's all one big stomach or whether I somehow have two. They go in, I spit their clothes or fur out my sex, but I still poop the rest. I'm curious, but obviously anyone who went in to see would have a problem telling me what he found."

"But it's the only way for me to really, you know, have fun," the big cat purred. "So I catch a deer or whatnot and stuff them in. And sometimes it still happens by accident. There was this poor bunny I met on a chat site, he decided to fist me...."

"My vet could figure it out. Ultrasound let them look right inside you. I got a a pair of jeans stuck in my intestine once and it was there plain as day on the screen."

"Mm," Patty purred, and her tail flicked. Smokey watched with considerable interest as the big cat's pussy twitched, then belched out first one and then a second tennis shoe whose owner no longer needed them. They must have been pulled from Tim's feet on the way in, and only now expelled. The rest of the man's clothing would follow once he was absorbed, or digested, or whatever Patty's odd sex did to people.

"Now there's a neat trick," he opened his mouth to say, but at at that moment Patty's muzzle dipped once more. Suddenly the urge to give her something to swallow with her mouth, as opposed to her pussy, was overpowering. Smokey groaned and rubbed her ears as he came. Two of the three people that'd come to the meadow had a good time today, anyway. That wasn't a bad percentage.