Invitation to a Stoner Sleepover
#6 of Royalty
Author's Note: Thanks to all my friends, viewers, and watchers. You guys are awesome!
Invitation to a Stoner Sleepover
One day, James II was sitting at his desk reading his mail and drinking a cup of iced coffee. It was all hate mail today, which wasn't uncommon for him. You see, James was not born in Jerk Island City, but in Densville, which is the capitol of the Wolf Empire. He was born there because his father, James I, had been forced to leave Jerk Island due to an invasion by Scüt Island. James I eventually regained his throne, but by this time James II was 20 years old and already had a life in Densville, which involved working for the wolf emperor, Lucius IV. James II hated JIC and only came there a few times a year to visit his father. Jerk Islanders saw his infrequent visits and his job with the wolf emperor as a sign that he was more loyal to the wolves than to Jerk Island. Because of this people sprayed graffiti on the palace and sent him messages accusing him of being a werewolf, a traitor and other bullshit. On top of that, some people wanted him to sell the island to the Foxes because their empire was more prosperous than Jerk Island. James II threw the letters away and said to himself, "I hate my job". He was about to play a video game to make himself feel better when he got a call from Kuhlman VIII, emperor of the Coyotes.
"Hey man, what's up", Kuhlman said.
"Same old, same old. What do you want", James said
"You need to chill out man and I know just the thing", Kuhlman said
"What's that", James said
"Come get high with me man. I have the good stuff, know what I'm saying", James said
"I don't do that. I'm not high off my ass 24/7 like you are", James said
"Do you have a stick up your ass or something", Kuhlman said
"No, it's just how I am", James said
"You'd feel better if you got baked", Kuhlman said
"No", James said
"How about I invite Lucius too? When he can all sit in a circle and share a bong. It'll be a sleepover", Kuhlman said
"Do you seriously think I'm going to go to one of your stoner sleepovers", James said
"You're no fun. You're like Max", Kuhlman said
"How dare you compare me to him", James shouted
"You have anger issues", Kuhlman said
"No I don't", James said, trying to be calm
"You do man. Hey, have you ever have one of those purple Jerk Island Cigarettes? You know, the one's that make you hallucinate and see weird shit? I would love to try those", Kuhlman said
"I can get some for you if you want", James said
"That would be awesome! How about you, me, Lucius, and Max all smoke them together", Kuhlman said
"You aren't going to get me and Lucius to go to a party where Max is invited", James said
"That wolf-fox rivalry thing is so stupid. I guess you really are a wolf at heart, huh? Well if we all get high together maybe you and Max will get along", Kuhlman said
"I wish I was a wolf. That way I wouldn't have to be emperor of this stupid, run-down, depressing, dreary, ass-backwards island and fat chance of me and Max ever getting along", James said
"Oh come on please come to my summer palace and get baked with me", Kuhlman said
"Hmmm...Well I could use a vacation", James said
"So you'll come", Kuhlman said
"Yes", James said
"Yay", Kuhlman said, "I'll look at my schedule and call you back with a date and time"
"Okay", James said, "Bye"
"Bye", Kuhlman said
After he hung up, James said to himself, "I can't believe I just agreed to a dope party with Kuhlman." James then sighed and ordered one of his interns to get him another cup of coffee.