Just you and me
Story by Fere_Ermelis on SoFurry
'Just you and me' was another story of mine to get into the 2019 Anthrocon Conbook, and follows the counselling session of a young fox desperate to have his freedom... freedom from stereotype, from the expectations of others and - unlike most foxes - to have the ability to sail the seas. He misses his high-school crush so bad!
Just you and me
He’d been in with Dr Aubrey Skarl for at least an hour… and his father was pacing up and down in the waiting room with a permanent scowl on his muzzle.
“For paws’ sake, Kit, would you sit your tail down for just one second?!”
“I don’t like it, love.” He muttered, shaking his head and giving off a scent from his tail that said nothing more than impatience and intolerance.
“Uh huh…” Jillian started, flicking through her magazine with a nonchalant exhaustion that came from hearing her mate’s extremely unsocial sentiments twenty-four-seven, “…well if you’d let the poor boy spend some time with his friends - the ones that he wants to hang out with, not the ones you’ve ‘pre-approved’ - then he wouldn’t ‘ave run away and he sure as shoot wouldn’t be in there now talkin’ to a shrink!”
“I just don’t want him hangin’ around with…” And Kit paused, cos’ he noticed the young wolf arriving for his shift as intern at the reception desk; and their eyes met with a shared, awkward exchange of smiles, “Never mind.”
He slumped to a sulk next to his long-suffering mate, his dark, musky tail draped over the right paw-rest. Kit was yielding his patriarchal authority over his cub and even his mate, paws forbid! And he hated it! He grew up in an Earth where the dog fox was supreme, and the cubs and vixens obeyed every word and wag; but the world had changed, and his young cub, Pax, was nearly eighteen and his rebellion had peaked.
Paws alive, he didn’t want to think of him living above ground, exposing his beautiful pelt to the sun and the musks of those that were grey.
**
“Tell me about your friend at school. This special friend.”
Pax paused, sitting up slightly on the therapist’s couch, his ears pinning and his muzzle blushing pink.
“You… you won’t tell anyone, will you?”
“This is just between you and me, young fox.”
“OK, well… his name was Dean. Man, he was so beautiful. But my dad, you see… he found out about me hangin’ around with him and told me I wasn’t ever to do such a thing.”
“Was Dean a bad influence on you, Pax?”
“No!” The youngster was pretty insistent, to the point of nearly bursting into tears, “I… I just wanted a friend and I… I’m tired of living underground.”
“In your home Earth, you mean?”
“Yeah, I’m… I want to go out into the moonlight and the sunshine. Just like Dean and his cool family.”
“Is that why you ran away?”
Pax sighed and closed his eyes, pulling his tail up from dangling over the couch’s edge to hold it nervously in his paws like a sentient comfort blanket.
“No.” He murmured in a sulk.
“So why exactly did you run away, Pax?”
“I wanted what Dean had.” He huffed impatiently, “He lived above ground and dreamed of goin’ on cruise ships and at sea, cos’ his dad was a Lupic Navy captain. But he lost his father when his ship went down on patrol. Dean said they never found him.”
“So, you comforted him when he was sad?”
“Absolutely. He recovered real well from it, pro’ly cos’ o’ his hobbies… building model ships. Silver and grey ones. He painted one with our names on it, and said we should sail away together one day, cos’ it was what his dad would’ve wanted.”
“What did your family make of that?”
“My mum’s always been supportive, but my dad…” And he paused with closed eyes and a sorrow-damp twitch to his tail, “My dad has always wanted me to be a digger or an earth builder, remain in the Vulpic lands to tunnel and build bigger and better homes for foxes. Or something like that anyway. I get fed up of hearing it. He never lets me do what I want to do.”
“You hate your dad for that?”
“I… I guess so. I don’t want to. I… just… I just wanted to be away from him for a while, s’all.”
The doc was making notes as Pax poured his heart out, that young muzzle trained to the ceiling, tears starting to roll down his red-furred cheeks.
“You model-build yourself?”
“Yeah, but I have to keep everything secret.” Pax sighed and shrugged, “Last time dad found a ship I’d built, he stamped on it and threw it in the bin, tellin’ me that I wasn’t to ever think of going to sea, let alone with another male of a ‘grey persuasion’.”
“Did he tell you why he did that?”
“He just said, as a fox, my duty was to the ‘subterranean’, to the land and to a vixen when the time came.”
“So, the pier – where the police found you – it reminds you of the wolf you want to be friends with?”
“That’s right. I don’t want the soil and grit in my fur. I want it to be sand and saltwater and seaweed and bits of shells and…” Pax’s voice started breaking, “I guess none of it’s worth thinkin’ about cos’ I’ll never get to do it.”
“Everything’s possible, young fox. This wolf you knew seems to have been the catalyst to a lifelong love of what’s out there in the oceans. But would meeting him again make you want to run away a second time, Pax?”
“Well, no, I guess not… as long as my da’ will gimme’ a break and let me do what I want with who I want. I’m not a cub anymore!”
“Legally, you are still a cub, Pax, and…”
“… foxes aren’t permitted to sail on the oceans without the King’s pawprint and scent, some kinda’ off-land form or somethin’… yes, I’ve heard it all before!” Pax got up and sat with a growl on the edge of the couch, paws either side of himself and his head hung, “You sound like my dad! Paws alive, I’d rather just sail out to sea and never go home... I love the light. I don't want to go to ground again.”
The doc’ paused.
“Well, what I’m going to do is ask you to relax and close your eyes. Lie back, there’s a good cub.” He guided Pax back to the comfort of the lounger.
The youngster huffed and puffed but obeyed.
“Now, let your tail sit still, let it flop comfortably… and imagine going to a place where you feel safe and happy. Tell me, Pax… where are you?”
Initially he just sighed, an impatience borne of having been here and done it with the doc’ many times before; but today, it was clearer for some reason.
“I… it’s a… I mean, I’m on a tropical island out in the ocean somewhere. It’s real quiet.”
“OK good. Are you alone, Pax?”
“I’m not su… wait, no, I… there is someone else. Someone’s callin’ me over.”
“OK, well pad closer… what do they look like?”
“He's smart and has a dressed tail, his shorts have an emblem on them – it’s my school emblem… Cherry Earth Reds. That’s the house me and Dean were in at school. Oh and… there’s a surfboard. He's a surfer. His fur is wet and… wow, it’s so beautifully silver and grey and… I can feel the sand between my pads and the water on my tail.”
His maw suddenly dropped and started to tremble.
“He's s… so… so l… lonely.”
Aubrey could see Pax was starting to cry, so he leant over and snapped his fingers to bring the young fox out of the trance.
“It’s OK, mate, you’re back with me now.” He murmured with a smile, “Our time is at an end for today, but what I’m going to do is write you a prescription for a low wag and dulled scent. But I encourage you to talk about your feelings instead of letting your tail droop so badly, OK?”
“Alright.” Pax murmured sadly, staring into space with his tail still hangin’ lifelessly over the edge of the couch.
It had been an abrupt end to the session, but he’d enjoyed seeing his crush at least once more, even if it had been in a dream. He padded out into the reception, back to his mother and father who both got to their footpaws as they saw him emerge.
But even before either spoke, his nose hit on something; and sure enough, over by the reception desk, sorting documents and fiddling with the photocopier was a very familiar tail.
“Dean??”
The young wolf turned to follow the sound, his thick, velvety triangle ears following suit, nose snuffling to pick up an unfettered happiness.
“Pax? Oh, paws above, I haven’t seen you in months! How are ya’, dude?”
“I’m uh… I’m good.” Pax’s white under-muzzle blushed, his footpaws pigeoning shyly.
“Awesome, I uh… I was wonderin’ if I’d made a bad impression on you or somethin’. I didn’t think… well I guessed you didn’t like me.”
“No I… I…” And it was then that Pax noticed his father scowling at him from across the reception area, paw on the door handle and ready to leave. His scent said as much. Foxes never had to speak. It was all in the wag of the tail.
“I’m sorry I was so distant n’ stuff. S’just that my dad wouldn’t let me come over or hang out.”
“Oh uh… god, I… I didn’t want to cause trouble.”
“Oh no no, you didn’t. It’s me… it’s totally me.”
There was a nervous pause as they were stuck smiling at each other, ears pinned in shyness and not sure what to say or do.
“Well heh… I uh, I’m glad I saw you today.” Dean coughed to compose himself and handed Pax his prescription slip.
“Me too.” The fox murred, clasping his paper whilst his eyes never met Dean’s for fear of blushing more.
He turned tail with his mum and headed for the door, leaving a trail of mixed-up scent in his wake… nerves, excitement and sadness.
“Hey Pax! Wait!”
The young vulp turned back. He’d secretly hoped to be stopped. Dean had come ‘round the counter, his tail wagging at a high hover.
“Well, s’just that we’re going on a cruise for a couple o’ weeks. Wanna’ come with? My older sister can’t make it and well... we have a spare ticket. I can teach you to surf n’ stuff, show you all the islands my dad visited when he was in the Navy.”
“Oh wow, I… I’d love to!” Pax’s four-feet of brush started wafting; he smelled so much sweeter in that moment. He turned to his mother, “Can I, Mum, can I? Pleeeease?”
His father had turned away and left in a huff, storming out with a strongly-musky negative scent… but his mother stood solidly behind her boy. Her tail dragged lower thinking about the fallout tonight at home, but for now she turned her attention to her cub’s new friend.
“Now Dean… you’d look after my boy, wouldn’t you?”
“Yes, ma’am.” Dean stood up straight, keeping his tail respectfully still for his elder.
“You’d keep ‘im safe?”
“Absolutely!”
“And you’d make sure he came back with plenty of memories?”
“Yes ma’am.”
She smiled.
“Well I think that’s a done deal.” Her long brush wafted happily, “Dean, you can tell ya’ mum to scent me when she has the details. And I’ll get the forms filled out and scented for Pax to be off-land.”
“I will, Mrs Marsh. Thank you.”
Pax was just bouncin’, he could barely contain himself. His tail smelled so much better, and his ears were perkier… and that smile! Paws alive! His mum could scarcely believe her nose.
He waved happily at his friend as he turned to leave, following the trail of his disappointed father to their car… but somehow, that didn’t dispel this feel-good feeling.
This was the start of something very special.
***