FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

As much as she deserved some soothing, she probably didn’t deserve a whole nap in his arms. Leo found himself stuck in the grasp of a beast as she snored away. Unfortunately he had gotten a little too relaxed and let her wrap her arms around him like fleshy vines, anchoring him to the spot. He was able to bend back and grab at his phone, affording him at least some amusement in the several minutes of wall staring. No work, though. Vernon probably lied about that little detail. Figures. Missy twitched and grumbled in her sleep. She hadn’t stabbed or bitten into him yet, so it must’ve been a good sleep. Hard to imagine she could be so peaceful after hearing her go on about how much a creature in the mist was going to tear them to shreds.

Suddenly, Missy’s calm breathing came to a stop with a snort. Some odd snuffling came out of her, then she yawned and grunted into a stretch. There was some prodding before Missy pulled back to size up Leo. “Sorry,” she said with a yawn. “You’re super comfy, you know that?”

“That’s nice. Can I have my body back now?” Leo asked, setting his phone down.

“Yeah.” She stretched once more and pulled away. “There you go,” she said with another yawn.

“I’m going to make lunch now.”

“Wait!”

“What? Aren’t you hungry?”

“Well, yeah, of course,” she said, taking hold of his hand. Today would have to be one of those three shower days. “What if that thing’s still out there though?”

“Look, it’s been nearly an hour since you slept. It’s definitely gone.” He tugged back, but Missy’s grip held.

“I still feel it,” Missy replied. She cocked her head. “Wait, you waited for me for a whole hour?”

“Nearly. Nearly a whole hour.” Leo tugged again. “Now I’m hungry.”

“But...” Her eyes did that ridiculous teddy bear thing again. That killed his appetite.

Leo rolled his own eyes. The straw was mounting ever higher on that camel. “OK, I get it. I’m going to disappear if I walk out there.” He plopped back down onto the bed. “Fine.”

“Thanks.” Missy quickly scooted up next to him, but thankfully relenquished his arm.

“So what are we going to do while waiting this out?” Leo crossed his arms and resumed counted the plaster spots on the ceiling.

“We could try talking again?” Missy said.

“No, thanks. I’m good.” Leo closed his eyes. Maybe he could get some sleep. A waste of time to be sure, but for once, sitting here felt exhausting.

“Hey!” The man snapped awake again. “Don’t fall asleep on me.”

“Why? You got a nap.”

“Yeah but you’re supposed to protect me,” Missy said.

“I thought the fog thing was going to kill both of us?” Leo replied.

“Only if we’re apart.”

“So what, sleeping is apart? Can’t wake me if fog starts pouring into the room?”

“No.” Of course not, no. That would make too much sense. Missy was alien to logic, so it was only natural to expect that she’d completely ignore it. “Maybe we can watch some TV though?” she asked sheepishly. At least that meant she was getting over it.

“It’s not gonna hear us?”

“I think it’s going away, we should be fine,” Missy said with a nod.

“Sure, turn on the boob tube.” Leo motioned toward the television. Never had he been happier to say those words. Something to at least work his mind in a dreary time like this. Missy cautiously grabbed the remote, then settled back against Leo’s side. Bam, the television was on and he had something to stimulate his weary mind. Television had been just about as worthless as the last time he watched it. Now though, now he drank it up like it was the last thing he’d ever see. Explosions, dramas, and slow documentaries. Missy flipped through them all, but of course lowering the volume before she did so. Wouldn’t want the monster in the woods to hear them watching ALF, right? Heaven forbid.

They continued on this for what must’ve been half an hour. Leo’s mind slowly disengaged from the visual drug. He had gotten his fill of mindless entertainment to get his mind jogging, letting it wander to other places. Like the snout laying on his arm, or the chest pressed up against him, or the hand rubbing up against his. Missy had completely relaxed into him. “Missy,” Leo said flatly.

“Yeah?”

“You seem awfully calm.”

“Oh?”

“That pit in your stomach gone?” There was a long pause. Her gaze was squarely centered on the television. “Missy?” She propped herself up on an elbow and looked around.

“Oh, huh, I think— yeah, I think it’s gone now. Phew!” The monstress let out a long sigh. “I almost didn’t think we’d make it. Weird how I didn’t even notice. But it’s fine now.” She put on a smile. Not a wholly genuine one either.

“Yeah?” Leo said, eyes narrowing.

“I think you can go get lunch now.”

“I certainly hope so.” Leo stood up, feeling slightly dizzy upon doing so. He walked over to the doorway and stopped. “Missy?”

“Mhmm?”

“Don’t ever lie like that again.”

“...OK, sorry,” she said. Leo shook his head and walked out. Once he was out of sight he instantly started stretching, working out all the knots in his body that built up over his forced lounging. His joints loudly popped. It was a wonder he didn’t snap any bones. Nobody to blame except himself. He was the one who decided to be nice and help some irrational fear. Leo walked right up to the window and gave the scenery a good, long stare. Not a drop of fog in sight. In fact, it was brighter than ever out there. Whatever. No more fog monster. No more soothing tense nerves.

After confirming that his one opportunity for an enjoyable day off had been thrown out, Leo stepped into the kitchen and began making a simple lunch. Somehow Missy had drained all of his energy, despite him not doing much of anything at all. He stopped for a moment and closed his eyes. Why’d you even bother? Yeah, she’d be annoying about it later, but she’d get over it. And then she had to go and draw it out at that. She may have been scared at first, but afterwards? Not a chance. Leo piled out all the ingredients for his meal. It had probably been a long time she just laid like that with anybody. Heck, it had been a long time since he did either. That wasn’t an excuse for what she did. What, was she supposed to ask instead? Hey friend, just need some human contact.

Leo finished their sandwiches and went right back to the bedroom. It didn’t occur to him that he chose to eat in the bedroom until he handed Missy her plate. Wouldn’t hurt this once, he supposed. Leo turned toward the television and ate quietly. “You’re not too mad, are you?” Missy asked, between bites.

“No.”

She chewed some more. “...But you’re mad, right?”

“I don’t know. You mind if I eat?” Leo replied. Missy nodded and they eased back into silence. The thought still bothered him, rubbing up against his thoughts. She wasn’t scared, so what was all that for? Loneliness? Sure, it could’ve been. Knowing Missy, it also could’ve been to fuck with him, but she gave up way too easy for that. He sighed. “What was all of that about?”

“What?”

“You know what I mean, Missy.”

“I was scared, that’s all.”

“After that.”

Missy took a few more bites. “I don’t know.” She shrugged. That could’ve very well been the case, but it didn’t sit right with him. “I just wanted to do it, OK? Don’t you do stupid things sometimes?”

“I try not to. At least not to other people.”

Missy crossed her legs. “Sorry.” Leo left it at that. He didn’t want to ruminate on the implications or if she had any actual reasoning for her actions. She did seem at least genuine, and it wasn’t that much of a big deal. It was a weird deal. Just swerve into something else.

“Alright.” He turned his attention back to his sandwich. “So what kind of clothes did you want?” he asked. Not entirely unrelated. The feeling of her fur still lingered in his thoughts, making the situation all the more uncomfortable.

Missy’s eyes widened. Yeah, that did the trick. “Oh, uh, I was browsing a few days ago and I saw this super cute tee with buttons.” Worked too well, even. “Then I was thinking it’d go with some jorts. Ripped.”

“Why ripped?”

“Saves me the trouble,” she said, holding up a hand. “Plus they’re cool.”

“You don’t want pants?”

“I’ve tried pants. They don’t work well with digi-tigi-ridi-grade.”

“What?”

“My bendy legs.” Oh, right. He looked to her legs. Did she try— “Not your pants. Just, you know, way back when.” Oh, good.

“So that’s it, just a shirt and shorts?” Leo asked, raising his brows.

“You mean I can have more?”

“That’s not what I meant.” The man set down his plate. “If you work for it, maybe.”

“I will, I will,” she said with a nod. Missy downed the last of her sandwich, forcing it down her gullet with a gag. Ugh. “So can we order them now or what?” That trick worked far, far too well.

“OK, one, make sure you chew when you eat.” Missy gave a small nod. “And two...” Leo motioned to the doorway. “Go wash your hands first.”

“Do you want me to put up my plate?” Missy asked politely.

“No, I’m on my way to the kitchen. Just go wash up.” The second he finished his sentence, Missy jumped off the bed and scrambled to the bathroom. He could hear her nails scratch against the wood floor. Leo winced and made a mental note to check on that later. “Ease up on the running,” he said as he picked up their plates. The bed wasn’t smothered in crumbs, thank heaven. Leo walked out to the kitchen and quickly washed up, neatly placing the dishes away. He turned back around to find Missy standing there. His nerves jumped but he managed to remain stoic.

“I stopped running, was I uh, quiet enough?” she asked, fluttering her eyes.

“Maybe a little too quiet.”

“Got your phone too. We can browse right now!” She held out his electronic brick.

Leo took the phone. “We can do that in the bedroom.” Sheesh, he was turning into her now. Well, more that it would be incredibly odd to sit huddled on the couch looking at clothes. Any weirder than doing it on a bed? He wasn’t getting dressed just to look at clothes, anyways. Leo walked back with Missy close in tow. All he could hear was her excited breathing, which made the experience more sinister. He sat down on the bed and Missy took her spot next to him.

“Is it OK if it has like, a graphic on it?”

“That seriously depends on the graphic. It’s not something stupid, is it?”

“What if it is? You’re the only one who’s gonna see it.”

“Not something obscene, then.”

“More obscene than nudity?” Missy looked down at herself. He really didn’t need that little reminder that she’s constantly nude.

Leo turned on his phone. “You know what I mean.” He navigated to the Internet and punched in a search for whatever clothing store came to mind.

“Not gonna go to Amazon?” Missy asked, pushing up against him to see more of the screen. “They have so much stuff on there.”

“Look, using Amazon rubs me up the wrong way, OK?” Much like you, he thought, pulling away from her. “These stores ship too.”

“Fine, OK, but what if they aren’t shipping what I want?” Missy tilted her head. “Would you uh, go to the store for me?”

Leo shook his head. “No. Not unless I had to get something else there.”

Missy seemed disappointed with that answer. “That makes sense, I guess.”

“Here.” Leo hushed all the voices yelling in his head and handed her the phone. “Pick out five tops and five bottoms. Let me repeat that—”

“Five tops, five bottoms. I know. I will,” she said, already swiping through the list faster than Leo could make sense of it. “You think I should get them in small?”

“I guess.” Leo sized up Missy. “Maybe a medium so you don’t shred the arms.”

“Whaddya mean? I’m not fat.”

Leo rolled his head. “Not because you’re fat.” Far from it. “Because of your claws. I know you’re going to wake up in the morning, slip on a shirt, not look at what you’re doing, and shred it to bits.”

Missy looked up at him. “OK, fine.” She paused. “But you want me to get medium shorts too? Claws down there too, ya know.” The way she phrased it put a terrible image in his mind.

“We’ll get you a belt.”

“You think I can work a belt? That’s super nice of you but no, I can’t.”

“Fine, I’ll put the belt on—” No, that wasn’t happening. “We’ll get you some adjustable shorts with string.”

“I like the belt idea.”

“Missy.”

“You offered,” she said with a snicker. “Ooh, ooh, look.” Missy tapped on the screen, bringing up an incredibly garish shirt that he wouldn’t have ever pictured. “Isn’t this just the coolest thing ever?” The dumbest grin was splayed across her face. A mixture of cheery excitement and giddy laughter.

Leo rubbed his forehead. “Is that ALF saying ‘cat-a-bunga’? On a skateboard? With a slice of pizza? And strangling a cat?” He rubbed his head more vigorously.

“You don’t remember Overboard but you remember ALF? Some priorities you have.”

“How could I forget that stupid thing? All those 80’s revival morons love him.” He shook his head. “Pick something else. Please.”

“Aww, c’mon, pretty please? Just this one! I promise I won’t pick the other stupid things.”

“You had other stupid things lined up?”

“Well yeah, I want my first clothes to be special.” She tapped her chin. “That sounds a little weird now that I say it. You know what I mean, anyways.” Leo could already picture her in the stupid thing, sitting on the couch, eating pizza, and watching that awful show while laughing at all the miserable jokes. That was probably the epitome of being Missy. At least the ugly thing fit her.

“You don’t eat cats, do you?” Leo asked. He wasn’t sure how serious that question was.

“Eugh, c’mon, you really think I’d eat a cat?”

“Wouldn’t exactly put it past you.”

“Do you know how long it takes to get the fur outta your teeth?”

“Alright, alright, you get the shirt. Just don’t wear it while I’m home, OK?”

“Topless it is.” Leo sighed. “Hey, you think I could get a bra too?” The question knocked Leo completely off balance. “It’s weird but I never wore one. Think it might be neat.”

“Didn’t you already say your fur was like that?”

“Fur doesn’t provide support.” One of her hands pushed up a breast, then turned to him. “Do you know the size stuff?”

Leo turned his head. “Missy, I’m not a woman if you hadn’t noticed.”

“Yeah but you had girlfriends, right? I thought that was a couple thing. You know, go to the store, try on the lingerie. That sorta thing.”

“No, that’s not a normal thing.”

“You mean that’s not a normal thing for you.”

“I think I’m a pretty normal person.” Roommates with a monster from the woods aside. One showing off her breasts at the moment. “If it’s not normal for me, it’s probably not normal.”

“So it’s normal for guys to have a fish hook collection?” Missy asked with a tilt of the head.

“You get the idea.”

“Soooooo what did you do with your girlfriends then?”

“Is that really important for picking out clothes?” Leo asked.

“I mean, yeah, sorta. You musta done some clothes shopping with them.”

“Sometimes, but it’s not like it was a constant thing. I never committed cup sizes to memory, alright?”

Missy returned to her browsing, but didn’t turn away. “Was it fun though?”

“Doesn’t the guy always hate clothes shopping in movies?”

“Well, duh, yeah, but you said real life was different.”

“Sometimes they’re accurate,” Leo said with a shrug.

“Oh, this is that thing where guys don’t care what they look like, right?”

“No, I think that’s something you do.”

Missy chuckled and patted his shoulder. Mind the nails. “I’m gonna wear that stupid ALF shirt all day.” God help him. “So was it really boring?”

“I guess. What fun is it looking at clothes? You can do that online. It’s not like they’d try them on or anything.”

“So you would prefer seeing the real deal.”

“I guess?”

“Were they uh, fun girls at least?” Missy looked up at him.

“If they were I’d probably still be with them.” That made him realize something. How the hell was he supposed to get married with Missy around? Oh yeah, sure, come move into my lovely home. Two bedroom, one bath, large kitchen. Don’t mind the Wolficus. Hope you’re not allergic. Leo briefly imagined her in a collar, sitting by the front door. No, that wasn’t happening. Where the hell was she going to go? At least there was no girlfriend to worry about. Yet.

“You OK? Did a bug bite you?”

Leo pinched the bridge of his nose. “I’m fine. You pick out any other clothes?”

“So you didn’t date any fun girls? Why’d you even go out with them?”

Leo tossed up a hand. “I went out with them because I thought they’d be good partners. Now you pick out any more clothes?”

“Were they pretty too, then?”

“Missy, c’mon.”

“OK, OK!” She nodded and scrolled through the phone. “Can’t blame me for asking. Other guys I talked to had awful ladies. So I was told. By them. I’m curious, ya know?”

“I’d rather not talk about it, OK?”

Missy snapped back to him. “Why? Were they terrible? What’d they do wrong?” she asked.

Leo waved his arms. “No, none of that. Look, let’s drop it, OK?” He turned to her. “Now, have you picked any good shirts?”

Missy opened her mouth, then shut it. “Let me look some more.” Leo was already picturing what stupid shirts she might pick out next. Some cartoon character doing drugs? Horrible, gruesome violence? Maybe an outdated catchphrase that only the most obtuse of people would even begin to understand. “How’s about this?” Missy held the phone up. Instead of a cartoon character beheading another, it was a short dress all patterned in flannel. Somehow it was disgusting but fitting for Missy and the area.

“You really want to wear that?” Leo asked.

“What’s wrong with it?”

“I dunno. Is there something stupid on the back?”

“Let me check.” She frowned. “Oh, yeah, there is.”

“What is it?”

“A zipper.” Missy looked back up at Leo. “You think you could do that up for me?” Leo wanted to object, but he couldn’t quite find the right words for it. It wasn’t a dumb shirt, at least. Would probably look modest on her.

“You can’t do that yourself? Just pull it up? Could probably hook your nail into the hook.”

“Uh, there is no hook. Plus it’d be hard to undo anyways.”

Leo shook his head. “I’d rather not do that part.”

“What? Why?” Missy asked.

He wasn’t saying it. “Put it on the maybe list.”

“Uhhhh, OK.”

“If you get it, you have to get underwear with it?”

“Why?”

“Just do it.”

“So do I get to pick five pairs of panties too?” Missy asked.

“Don’t say it like that.”

“Say it like what?”

“Look, just order a package of the stuff.”

“Woah, they sell panties in packages too? I always thought that was a guy thing.” Missy sped through the phone. “What color do you think I should get? Probably not black, right?”

“I don’t know, just pick something you think fits.” Leo shrugged and looked to the wall. Too late, he was already picturing her in a colorful array of underwear. Imagine her in black. Or would that make her look nude? She was already nude anyways. Good Lord, you just can’t win.

“You’re gonna be the one seeing them, don’t you want a word in it or what?”

“They’ll be under your clothes, so it’s not as though that really matters, right?”

Missy looked back at Leo. He really didn’t need her gaze at a time like this. “So what, do I have to wear clothes in bed at night? That’s gonna be super awkward. And hot too.” Awkward. Yeah, it would be more than awkward. She was constantly nude, but now that he saw her as something more than a pest... His eyes briefly flicked to her. The taboo of lingerie or pure nudity. No. Neither. There would have to be more distance between them. “You OK there? Sheesh, must be a lotta bugs in here.”

“Yeah, no, I mean, I’m fine.” Leo nodded. “You’re right.”

Missy pulled back. “I am?”

“We’ll talk about it later. Look, I’m going to check on something else. Don’t order anything yet.” Leo placed his hands on his knees and started to get up.

“Hey, c’mon, wait.” A hand settled on his shoulder. “I want your opinion.”

“Missy, I know I’m going to be the one seeing them, but it really doesn’t matter what you’re wearing as long as you wear it.”

“That’s a little mean,” Missy said, hand slipping away from him.

Leo narrowed his eyes. “Really not sure how I could be nicer.”

“Alright, yeah, I guess that was a little dumb to say. But like, this is the first time I’m ever gonna get something for myself, Leo.” Almost felt wrong to be called that by Missy. “And you’re gonna buy it, so like, I should look good for you. Right? That makes sense. Right?”

It made some sense. Demented, lonely, Missy sense. Leo put on his best calming smile. “Missy, it’s your own clothing. Like you said, you earned it. You don’t need validation, do you?”

“Sometimes it’d be nice to get some,” she replied, deflating. Just had to pull that one on him, huh?

Leo turned his whole body toward her again. “Look, Missy, it’s not like I’m a judge of fashion anyways.”

“So? Just tell me if it looks good, OK? You hated the ALF shirt so you definitely got opinions. We never do anything together anyways.”

“I spent several hours with you in this damned bed.”

“...Yeah but I was scared.” Missy shrugged. “And you’re a nice guy.”

“Really? What gave you that impression?” Leo crossed his arms. “Look, OK, fine, just go through the list and I’ll tell you if I like them or not.”

“Cool! Cool.” Missy moved back up next to him, showing off the phone. She went through random shirts, dresses, shorts, pants, and even skirts. She never stayed on one for long, though. As soon as she saw something else she snapped right to it and spent several minutes looking over it. “Whaddya think about this one?” She showed off a surprisingly plain blue sweater.

“That looks pretty cozy.” He paused and straightened himself out. “You’re not going to rip it up?”

“No, I mean, well, like I guess I could fold my hands up like this.” She did one of those generic Italian hand gestures and waved it about.

“You sure that’s enough? I’m not buying it again if it isn’t.”

“Worked on your shirts.”

“Yeah. Thank God for that.” Leo shook his head. “How much does it cost?”

“Thirty bucks,” Missy quickly replied.

“Thirty bucks.”

“Well, yeah. Is that a lot? I mean, too much?”

Leo decided not to go on about how little she contributed and that everything she had done up to this point wouldn’t have even worked up to buying this sweater in a thousand years. He cleared his throat. “How about you set this aside for later and we’ll get it for your birthday?”

“Birthday?”

“Don’t pull that mystery nonsense on me. I know you have a birthday.”

“I’m just surprised you remember.” Missy put on a goofy smile. “Do you remember what day it is too?”

“I only remember it’s in July because school ended before that.”

Missy giggled. “That’s better than I expected! Should I tell you now or make it a biiiiiiig surprise?”

“I honestly don’t want to know what you have in mind as a surprise on your birthday. Just get back to the clothes. Something cheaper, please.” It was times like this he hated himself. Maybe if he learned to keep his mouth shut all the time, he wouldn’t be stuck in situations like this. “What about those?” Leo pointed to the screen. Missy brought up the product.

“Jorts? You want me to wear jorts? Really, Lion?” Missy said with a chuckle.

“What? I don’t know, I thought they’d fit you. No pant legs to get caught in. Jean fabric seemed like your thing.”

“And you said you weren’t a judge of fashion. Sure, those’ll go right on the list.” Somehow it felt like he had made a huge mistake. “Four shirts and pants to go! Plus some bras.”

“You can do the bras on your own.”

“Fine.”

_

Leo looked at the weird amalgam of choices Missy made. One stupid ALF shirt, some wildly colored shorts, a couple of thankfully plain shirts, and one bright orange shirt that read ‘momster’. Of course. Also a few unmentionables for her that she could sort out. There was also one more odd shirt with a man on the front making a stupid face. Missy refused to tell Leo its origins aside from saying some stupid word. “So? Is it cheap enough?” she suddenly asked.

“Sixty seven bucks isn’t bad.” He looked up at her. “You’re not a mom though, so why this?”

“That makes it doubly funny!” Missy replied, as if it were an obvious answer.

“Whatever. You know you have to keep doing your chores, right?”

“Yes, I know.”

“Just making sure.” Leo mentally prepared for the wallet stab and his finger hovered over the order option. “And you’re OK with all of this?”

“Aaaaaabsolutely!” Missy said with a nod.

“Alright.” Leo tapped the button and let the order process. “Looks like they should come on Saturday.” Thank goodness. He would absolutely expect Missy to burst out of the front door and scare the living daylights out of whatever poor soul was forced to deliver here. “Hope you enjoy.”

“Great! Now what?”

“What do you mean?”

“Uh, thought were gonna do something else?”

“You—” he handed the phone back to her “—can get back to work on making a new computer. I’ve got something to look at. I’ll check back on you.”

“Aye aye, captain.”

Leo stood up and moved over to the doorway before turning back. “And don’t order anything else. I’ll know.”

“I wouldn’t.” Missy shook her head. “Thanks for the clothes!”

“You’re welcome.” How many people would unironically say that for clothes? At least she was happy. Leo moved into the hallway and then into his exercise room. He looked about the area. Would you really want to do that? Staying in bed with Missy certainly brought its wealth of issues, but going the full mile? Giving her a room to herself? That was pretty much the last step to permanence. How would you get her to leave then? There was still the trouble of where she would go. Out of all their little friend group, he was the last on the list. Why was he last anyways? He walked over to the exercise bicycle and sat down on it. He did move out of state, after all. Probably the hardest to even get to considering her position.

Maybe it could be a temporary room. This was a guest bedroom after all, or that’s what the listing said from what he remembered. He was out in the woods, who would live here and have guests? How do you make a room temporary anyways? There was the inflatable bed he planned to use for camping. Probably a bad idea with the knives she had on her, but it was the most ‘temporary’ thing he could think of. Anything to get her out of the room at night. Leo already began categorizing everything in the room and thinking of where to store them or even sell. A part of him was annoyed that he even had to shake up his life like this for Missy, and another part was happy to think about a new project. Anything to get his mind jogging after the hours of nothing. He began idly cycling on the exercise machine. The storage room was a better pick, but this was a good enough place to think about it for now, being similar in size.

The doorhandle was probably the biggest problem. Missy didn’t seem to care about privacy, but if she could shut herself into a room, all the better. Are you really going to go out of your way to install a lever handle? Why not? He didn’t usually go into the storage room, wouldn’t make a difference when she was gone after all. Leo stopped cycling and peered out into the hall to see if Missy was still in the bedroom. The TV was on, so she was in there for sure. The bed would probably go near the far wall, just so she was out of view if he had to walk out of his room at night. Then what else? He glanced around the room. Maybe a laundry basket for some of her clothes? That he would have to fold up and refill. Maybe he could teach her how to do laundry too.

So that’s it then, you’re clearing out a whole room for an inflatable bed and a basket, then going to rip out a couple of door handles and replace them. Leo pursed his lips, then nodded after a few moments of thinking. Yeah that was probably worth it for a good night’s sleep, among other things. Hell, she’d probably go hogwild for it too. Could maybe get her to move some of the stuff too. No, wait, that would be a terrible idea. Just you. Not that she could even lift half of the things in the room. Leo soon realized this would probably be the first time she ever had a room to herself, aside from a living room. Unless Ms. Swanson gave her one, which was likely.

You already gave her clothes. What’s to stop her from doing more work and asking for junk to put in her room? She’d probably get better at it too. It’s not as though you can tell her she has to leave eventually. He braced his arms against the handle bars and rested his head on them. It’s only going to get harder to make her find another place to live. Leo began cycling. Was that even fair? What choice did she have in the matter? It would’ve been better that she never came into his life. Leo stopped cycling for a moment, then continued. But if she truly had nowhere else to go after him, how could he force her out? She was a bastard, sure. An improving bastard. Not all of it was her own fault. Even if she was lying about him being her last shot, there was no doubt he was probably the best life she’d get.

Leo sat upright. Better not think about it. Just focus on getting her into a room and see how fate does you dirty afterward. Missy walked in not long after with a wide grin. Ah, speak of the devil. Should’ve closed the door. “Yes?” Leo asked.

“Go on, ask how great I am.”

“Just tell me what it is, Missy.”

The monstress walked over to the exercise bike, then crouched low and held up the phone. “Check it. I found nearly all the parts we need on sale.” Indeed, she showed off a cart filled with computer parts. They were still relatively pricey, with some only going up to six percent off, but it was good to see her making the effort. “So am I great or what?”

Or what? “Hey, good work. Almost surprised.”

“Yeah, I do great work, don’t I?”

He turned toward her. “You pick out a computer case?”

“Thought we could tape the whole thing to the wall. Would look cool huh?” Missy smiled. “OK, no, as cool as that would be, I thought you should choose that.” She handed the phone over to him.

“Oh, well, thanks.”

“But I did put some good ones on the list!”

Leo scrolled through the cart. “Yeah, I can see that.” Some absurdly designed cases that looked like decepticons and other evil machines. “I think I’ll pick something more businesslike.”

“What? Aren’t those cool though? They look like decepticons, right? Don’t they?”

“Uh, if you say so.” Leo shrugged. “Don’t want to pick something so malicious for work. I might get the wrong idea.”

Missy shot up into a standing position. “It’d be the perfect thing to start you work on world domination.”

“I couldn’t even imagine how tedious it would be to run a whole world. Managing internet domains is more than enough.”

“You don’t want to rule the world? I guess it must be a woman thing.”

“Yeah, I imagine it is.” Leo stood up. “You sure this is all completely correct? This is your research after all.”

“All correct, sir. Television has been pretty boring as of late, so I had plenty of time to go over it.”

“Naturally.” Leo examined the price. Over three hundred smackers. Wouldn’t make a dent in his savings, but the thought stung all the same. He spent some time researching it himself so he wouldn’t live and die on Missy’s word alone. Everything seemed to be in place from what he knew. Hopefully. “So you ready to build it too?”

Missy held up her hands. “Yeah, I’ll get right to work on those delicate parts real quick, boss.”

“I guess you got me there. You can tell me where the parts go though, right?”

“Oh yeah.” Missy nodded. “I’ve seen so many fat guys assemble computers, I could do it in my sleep. If I had the hands for it.” She shrugged.

“Let’s hope so.” With all his might, he ordered the parts. Spending money twice in one day. This was becoming a terrible habit.

“Thanks!”

“You know this computer isn’t for you, right?”

“Yeah, but you let me put it together. Never thought I’d do that.” Missy tilted her head. “I was lucky enough to break one! Uh, sorry about that.”

“It’s fine, you made up for it.” He looked back down at the phone and the large order confirmed text. Sort of made up for it. There probably wasn’t a chance she’d ever make up for the cash he spent on her. Leo pocketed his phone and looked back up at her. “So what do you want for lunch?”

“Pizza.”

“Subs it is.”