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Why did I ever think that would be a good idea?!?!

Of course a chance to make out with Scott, 'fake-gay' prank or otherwise, was too good to pass up. But it was also too good to be true: no one said anything about him grinding up against my big gay boner in nothing but a jockstrap and now the cat's out of the bag and he probably knows I'm gay and everything's going to be awful.

Even though it was supposed to be a joke, I just stood there in shock and let the big Polar Bear have his way with me like I was a gay blowup doll. Not only that, people saw and they're going to suspect, which wouldn't have mattered so much if I just played it off as a joke like I was supposed to! Now people won't just call me 'Bootleg Taro', but 'gay-Taro' too! Ooohhhh I'm such an idiot!!!

Sean had just stormed out of the locker room, disgusted at how incredibly gay Scott and I had been acting. Sean's homophobic intensity terrified me, and I wanted to do something to show those around me that 'oh hey jk this was just a dumb joke lol!', but the mixture of my fear of being outed and my exacerbated gay-hormones had my senses completely overloaded. All I could do was stare off into space and babble like an idiot.

Of course Scott effortlessly pushed the joke further, calling out to Sean saying, "Good thing you don't think being gay is contagious or anything! Oh wait, yes you do! Gimme a call if you start getting a craving for Wieners, I'll let you have a taste of mine!" His voice brimmed with confidence, confidence that must have made it obvious to any listening that the whole thing was just a prank. Joking about being gay must be a lot easier when you're not secretly gay...

Scott soon broke into laughter, then Rob and Marty followed suit; I suppose I should have too if my body wasn't being completely useless. Scott thanked me for a 'playing along' (like he didn't totally just feel the giant tent in my pants pressing up against him) with a slap on the back. It wasn't even that hard, but after today's leg training and all that stress, my weakened noodle legs couldn't take it. I fell down to the ground, probably bruised the tip of my muzzle too, but it didn't register. So I just lay there on the floor, like the stupid piece of garbage that I was. The adrenaline had died down, yet my boner still taunting me with its stiffness, precum slicking my underwear. "I think I broke Toru, you guys," Scott joked, except it was so completely on point. I was broken pretty bad.

I heard Rob and the others leave, and then Scott call out my name a few times, but I couldn't drum up the courage to respond. What was even the point in moving? I might as well just accept my new life as a door mat because people were going to walk all over me now anyway. ... Walk over me more, that is.

Scott hunkered down by my side, still in nothing but a jockstrap, and called out to me again, "C'mon Toru, we're wasting valuable lunch time here." He grabbed my reluctant body from under my armpits and hoisted me up on my feet. "Upsy-daisy!" Somehow, despite the sweet allure of gravity calling me back down to the floor, I managed to stay up on my hindpaws.

I looked at Scott with my ears folded down like the defeated loser-Dog that I was... GAY defeated loser-Dog. I couldn't even think of anything to say. Did I want to pretend like nothing happened? Or make up some bullshit excuse? Or do I just confess to being gay and accept my new life as a pariah and victim of perpetual bullying? Every option I could think of seemed worse than the last.

After an awkward moment of silence, Scott half-smiled at me. "Sorry, did I go a little too far with that? You seemed to be enjoying it though, haha," he laughed at me, pointing to my big shameful boner. He noticed! Panic once again cut through me; I covered my crotch with both paws and whined like a sorry bitch. He just laughed at me again, "Can't say I'm surprised though, I am quite good at grinding, hehe," he flashed a dreadfully white smile at me... So much white. So much sexy, irresistible white all over that body... curse the white, why did I have to fall for its trap? And while I'm at it, curse his impossibly perfect abs for drawing me in, curse his happy go lucky attitude for convincing me it'd be fine, and curse his stupid big package for grinding up on my junk too! WHY DID I AGREE TO THAT?!

I felt hot tears forming in my tear ducts. It was all I could do to not cry like a big fucking baby right there. "Don't ever tell anyone..." I muttered, biting my lower lip.

He tilted his head at me with a cocky smile, "Wait, what is it you don't want me to tell people?" I was hit by a jolt of angry electricity.

Haven't you done enough Scott?! It's not enough that you know I'm gay, but now you also want me to spit it out? How cruel can you be?!

"You can't ever tell anybody..." My voice was choked with pain and panic. I couldn't say it, not in the goddamn Boy's locker room, but I just couldn't let him make an even bigger fool of myself; I'd been through enough. I ripped my phone out of my pocket and banged out a quick message: You can't tell anyone I'm gay. I held it close up to his face, paw shaking.

Scott never stopped smiling as he read my message, "'You can't tell anyone I'm fat'? phhhh" Scott flicked his wrist with a 'that's just silly' look on his face. "Toru, you're not fat! You just have tiny bit of extra pudge is all. Plus, it's not like you can hide how you look, dude. Unless you're planning to Photoshop your Tinder profile photo or something?"

I felt a wave of hot embarrassment rush through me. I looked at the message disbelievingly; in my haste, I had accidentally hit the 'f' and 't' keys instead of 'g' and 'y'. I whined with folded ears, and stomped my foot on the ground a few times, frustrated that I managed to fuck up even that. Scott kept on smiling at me, raising an eyebrow like I was a child. I changed the 'fat' to 'gay', and held up my phone one more time, a deeply painful frown on my face.

Scott's smile faded after he read it, "Oh... OH!" He backed away from my phone and started scratching the backside of his head, eyes wide. "So that's what was going on there...Uh..." He checked around both ends of the locker isle. Our aisle was empty, but the happy chatting of other furs still changing reached our ears. "Let's... maybe talk about that somewhere private where we can get some space, after I, you know, put some clothes on..." Scott stretched out the last four words, and the hot embarrassed feeling tugged at me even harder.

Oh great, now he's going to be uncomfortable around me in the locker room because he'll be afraid that I'll be checking him out, isn't he?

He must have realized by know sexy I thought he was... I mean why the fuck else would I go along with that kind of prank if I was gay? There was no way I was going to make it any more obvious; if he caught me checking him out he'd be uncomfortable at best, and want to beat me up at worst. So I didn't dare sneak a peek while he was changing, but the fact that I still wanted to made me want to strangle myself. So I waited with averted eyes, stewing in my shame and misery, like the world's most pathetic Japanese hot pot with only dinky mushrooms and cabbage in it.

I was vaguely aware from sound that Scott was changing quickly. He probably finished in a minute, but it felt like an eternity. He nudged me on the shoulder to catch my attention and suggested we go out by the dumpster near the school's parking lot to talk. It provided a blind spot while being separated far enough away from the school, making it the perfect spot perfect for private conversation. I didn't have the energy to think of a better alternative, so I followed him here, my eyes glued to his feet the whole time. Sometimes the stoner kids hung out around the graffiti-ridden dumpster, but nobody was around today. It was small comfort to me, though.

Once we got behind the dumpster, Scott tried to casually edge in to the topic, "Hey, sooo-"

At that moment something primal spurred me to look him in the face, all the horror and ugly pain resurfacing on my face at once. "-You can't tell anyone!" I re-emphasized. The words come out pathetic, like a bitch's whining.

"Dude, I think you might be overreacting a little-"

His words didn't reach me properly. My emotions had completely overtaken me, the welling tears in my eyes that I had been holding back overflowed down my cheek. "-I didn't want anyone to find out I was gay! Especially not in such a stupid way as this, ugh, I'm such an idiot!" I dropped my lame purple trapper on the ground with a hard thwack. Covering my eyes with both paws to cover my pathetic tears. It my tail wasn't permanently curled up like a stupid curly-fry I would have tucked it under my legs.

"Dude, Toru..."

Everything came spilling out. All of it, just all of it.

"You have no idea how hard it is to be a gay twin! It was fine when we were little pups but once I found out I got scared and confused and lost my confidence while Taro was able to have fun and be a playboy with girls, but my parents still try to force me into doing everything he does and being just as good as he is even though I don't even really like sports, and they even try to dress us the same way and pressure me to date girls like he does but then they also give me shit when I don't live up to their expectations and it's exhausting and I just want to live a quiet life as my own person but I'm actually secretly really lonely and desperate and-"

I could see between the cracks of my fingers that Scott's muzzle was withdrawing. He looked incredibly uncomfortable. "-Uh, Toru, you're really unloading a lot on me, really fast, right now."

"And now I'm saying too much and talking too fast, and being too emotional and making you uncomfortable and ooohhh," I started groaning along with my sniffles. Was there no limit to just how pathetic I could be?! Who knew what Taro or my parents would say if they saw me like this. And not just them, my Japanese ancestors from four generations back were probably harshly judging me up from heaven too: You have brought dishonor to our lineage, shameful crybaby gay-pup. Not only did you lose the spar of tongues to Scott-san, you are also being a total bitch about it, too! Why can't you be a proper alpha Dog like your twin-brother? There is no excuse, for you have the same body! Your only penance: Japanese-ritual suicide!

Maybe I wasn't going to do that, but... "Don't mind me I'm just going to beat my brains into a pile of mush. Goodbye cruel world."

I hit my forehead against the ugly browned-green dumpster wall w. Thwam. It hurt but I didn't care. I kept on going. Thwam.

"Toru!"

Thwam Thwam Thwam.

"Dude, stop! You're seriously going to give yourself a concussion!" Scott grabbed me by the shoulder, flipped me around and looked me straight in my bloodshot eyes. His grip was strong, but it just made me feel even more weak and powerless than I already was. I couldn't even look him back in the eyes, all I could do was give a big droopy frown. "Why bother stopping me? You probably hate me now. What's even there to like? I'm just a slower, weaker, less talented and gayer version of my brother. I might as well not exist, just let me pound my head into a pulp."

"Oh for the love of... Toru, I would never hate you! You're awesome and you're my friend, Geese Louise!" he shook me as he spoke, as if to drive home his emphasis.

My ears folded down, my posture vulnerable and submissive. "...You don't hate me?"

"Nah Brah! Look I don't care if you're gay, man. It's fine. You're fine."

It seemed like the exact words I wanted to hear, but I couldn't find myself able to just believe it. "...I am?"

"Uh-duuuh," he said with a comical cross-eyed look. He let go of my shoulders. "You think the guy who made the suggestion to gay-make out as a prank would care if somebody's actually gay? No freaking way man!"

"...Really?"

"How many times do you need me to reassure you?" He said with a huff. "I'm telling you man, you're blowing this up way out of proportion. What, did you think I'd do something to you when I found out?"

"I thought maybe..." I couldn't look at him while I said it, "You were going to beat me up, tell the whole school and not be my friend anymore..."

He recoiled at my comment, "Holy shit, no, NO! I would never do that. I don't think even _Sean_would go so far as to beat you up. Oh my God, dude."

"Oh..." was all I could say. Bullying, abuse, ostracization... It seemed like it happened a lot to gay guys. Those thing were everywhere in TV shows, gay stories online and accounts from other gay people... was I wrong to think it would be different for me? I looked up at Scott, belief slowly starting to settle in, but otherwise still afraid of what he'd say next.

He let out a few chuckles, "You're looking at me like you're not sure if I'm going to hit you or make out with you again, heh. Here, c'mon, you look like you need a bro hug."

He embraced me in a warm, affectionate hug. It felt good, like he was protecting me. I spent a few moments catching my breath and letting all of his reassuring words sink in. I wanted to nuzzle his chest and just melt away... but at the end of the day he was still straight, and I didn't want to make him have to be so physically close to a gay guy like me, so I pulled out after a short while. "You're not going to tell anyone, are you?"

He thought about it for a moment, but ultimately shook his head, "Nah... I mean, not if you don't want me to... I don't think Rob and the others would care if you told them, though."

Coming out to the rest of the guys... I was nowhere near ready to even consider that. I still felt like a vulnerable, squishy sponge, and I already had so much to process, "Maybe... don't tell them..."

Scott just shrugged at my reply, "Alright, I won't. You can tell them when you're ready, or not, I guess. And uh, if you need to talk about all that, uh, 'gay twin angst' stuff you mentioned, I'll totally lend you an ear."

I cringed a little bit. I forgot just how much of my insecurities I had randomly blurted out. "T-Thank you..." I don't know why, maybe just to shift the topic, but I felt the need to ask again, "So you really don't care?"

His answer was completely nonchalant, but struck me right in the core, "'Course not, Dude. In fact, heck, I might even be a little bi or something, I dunno. It was pretty fun making out with a cute guy like you after all."

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Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat??????!?!?!??!?!?

I couldn't believe my ears. "You are? It was? I'm cute?! What?"

He laughed modestly, "Eh 'maybe', 'yes' and 'also yes'."

Was this adrenaline, or my immune system shutting down? Was I going to vomit or explode? Was this another joke, or for real? "I think I might pass out..." I muttered as the last vestiges of power was sapped from my knees. My body lurched forward, and then succumbed to gravity's heavy pull.

"Woah, the Leaning Tower of Pisa falls again!" Scott joked, and I once again found myself in the Polar Bear's arms, the side of my muzzle was pressed against his firm chest. I felt myself blushing when I sniffed in Scott's deep scent. I tried not to think about it the last few times I was this close to him, but that deep manly, herbal scent, oh my... Thankfully, I caught myself before I started murring. What was happening to me?

"Geez Toru, Leg Day must have been extra rough, huh?" Scott laughed as he helped me regain my balance. I blushed, suddenly extra aware of just how good his strong grip felt. It was fleeting though, after helping prop me up, he patted me on the shoulder and gave me a thumbs up, "Anyway, don't sweat it. You're secret's safe with me! C'mon, we've had enough heart-to-heart talking, let's go get some grub."

I wanted to, but... everything was spinning. "Oh... I need to collect my thoughts for a bit... I'll catch up in a few," I managed to say, albeit in a breathy voice.

He just casually shrugged both shoulders, "Alright dude, don't blame me if all the good stuff is gone by the time you get there! See ya in a bit!"

"Bye..." I said quietly as I watched him wave at me as he dashed back to school. I leaned my every increasing body weight against the side of the dumpster. I slowly slid down until collapsing on my butt, curly tail peeled upward against the wall.

I felt weirdly blank and light, so much so that a gust of wind could blow me away. I didn't know what to do, so I just stared out into the nearby woods, watching the autumn leaves fall to the buckeye-ridden forest floor. My nose began to pick up a scent from the dumpster that was somewhere between rotten shrimp and a week-old laundry. My ears became aware of the chirping of feral birds and the vrooming of cars off on the school road. I guess my brain needed to reprocess my sense of reality from basic sensory input. After that conversation nothing seemed to make sense, and yet everything made sense. Left felt like right, the ground like the sky, and life felt like a dream... And then I was smiling. I began to smile more and more with each passing second. My body was tingling and a happy glow began to envelop me. The happy glow turned into a fluttering bliss that took over me, and I sighed contently, even chuckling lightly to myself.

It took me a few moments, but I realized that this was far more than me processing a simple feeling of relief. No, I knew exactly what this was. Did I even have to say it? I was crushing on Scott, hard. It was worse than any of the tiny little crushes I used to have. I did always have bit of a thing for the Polar Bear (how couldn't I with a body like that?), but now, I was downright smitten. He even called me 'cute'! Nobody's ever called me that before! ...What if I actually had a chance with him? After all, he said he might be bi and earlier today he seemed like he really wanted to break up with Katie! My cheeks were getting hot and my heart was racing a mile a minute just thinking about him. I placed my paws to my stretchy cheeks. Just imagine how amazing it would be to go out with a hunk like that...

We'd go out on a date to a fancy restaurant, and then we'd go to a festival and have our first kiss to fireworks, and he'd ask me to be his boyfriend and I'd say yes, and then we'd go on several more magical dates, and then we'd go to the same college and room together and have all kinds of amazing sex, and then after graduating we'd have a trip to Japan and go to Tokyo Disney Land and that's where he'd surprise me with a proposal on top of the Ferris wheel where he planned for it to stop, and then we'd get married, and it would completely one up Taro's stupid hetero marriage to some bimbo, and Scott would be there in a tux (a Purple tux!) and he'd kiss me passionately after we said our vows, and there'd be a thunder of applause and it'd be amazing and magical, and then we'd go on a honeymoon to Bali, and then we'd adopt four children, two Dogs and two Polar bears, their names would be Haruna, Kazuichi, Misaki and Steve, and we'd grow old together, die at around age one-hundred, and be buried in the same cemetery and then reincarnate only to end up together again and...

Okay, maybe I'm thinking a bit too long term here.

It was ridiculous, but the fantasy had me in a vice-grip. Thinking about all the memories I could make with him smiling at me, oh, that amazing smile of his... I felt warm and fuzzy inside, but there was a bit of fear mixed in as well. After all, now that I spilled the beans to one person, I'm more liable to do it again, and again... And not to mention the impending aftermath of 'Operation: fake-gay makeout'. Sean was probably going to give me shit (or at least nasty glares), and Taro might also be mad, especially if people mistake him as the twin who went on the 'rainbow train to Fagsville'... But now I had Scott to support me.

After breathing in deeply to keep myself sane, I went from hormonal mess of emotions to finally feeling alright again. I picked up my fallen trapper, took one more deep breath and pumped my open fist. This was okay, I was going to be okay. All the adrenaline had had my stomach in a knot, but it must have unraveled because now the hunger pangs were hitting. All I had to do was go to lunch and... try to be cool.

I smiled at myself, all embarrassed. After double-checking that nobody was in the vicinity, I let out a few happy gay-boy giggles just to get it all out of my system. Alright, I had this. I took one step forward, my legs held. Then I took another, and then another. Before I knew it I was back inside Grovedale's west wing outside the crowded cafeteria. It wasn't quite as scary as I thought it'd be.

At first I thought this whole 'Operation: Fake-gay Makeout' thing was a disaster, but maybe it was actually a blessing in disguise. In the aftermath of it, not only did I find out that Scott was totally cool with me being gay, but maybe -maybe it's just a snowball's chance in gay-hell- but just maybe, I had a chance with him!

Heck, maybe there was hope for a guy like me after all!