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Omnipocalypse: Chimera ‘n Conquer

OmniPokelypse Sunstone

By Von Krieger

This was not my apartment. For one, I didn’t have a second story bedroom. For two, I most certainly didn’t have some kind of lurid, pulsating hybrid of a video game console, strange fleshy egg, and onaholes on equally fleshy cords whose black and green color scheme stated it was a “Sexbox 690.” For three, even if I did, I wouldn’t have had it and the (equally biological looking) television analog (it kind of reminded me of a giant eyeball, a TV that watches you back) in the middle of the room like some kind of weirdo. That was how you break either your neck or your console by tripping over the power cables. For four, the décor was something you’d expect from a ten-year-old kid, not a grown-ass man. And for five, my apartment (and everywhere else I’d ever lived, for that matter) was definitely not made up of some kind of biological goop that made it look like some kind of hive or the inside of somebody’s intestines or something like that.

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[Congratulations and condolences, dear user. The world as you know it is at an end, but rejoice, for the Great System is upon you. Your initial welcoming into the System was interrupted due to your mind and body being overloaded with energies not native to your dimension of existence by an extradimensional influence.]

[Cataloged as “Xenoslimecubus Parabolic Sex Ray,” this discharge has attracted the attention of several organizations from outside your realm that have decided to sponsor you.]

[The Celestial Menagerie is tasked with maintaining the biodiversity of the multiverse, having access to the genetic blueprints of thousands of organisms (usually animal in nature, but not always), acting as a collective archive for many species that do not exist outside of their limited section of existence.]

[You are now part of this archive. Simply taking action in your world as a wielder of the Celestial Menagerie will generate Celestial Points, which you can use to acquire new creatures and abilities.]

[You have also gained access to the Chaos Gacha, whose usage is somewhat less benevolent. The Gacha is a favorite of entities of large amounts of power and low tolerances for boredom, and as such they grant the capacity to draw upon random assortments of abilities, items, traits, skills, familiars, in return for you taking action in your world and bringing them amusement.]

[Due to your circumstances (molecularly degenerating into a slime-like entity) at the time of activation, your starter power from the Menagerie and one of your Chaos Gacha rolls were consumed in order to stabilize your body.]

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Sylvia, Elite Familiar, Chaos Gacha - Platinum Starter Ticket

● A growth chimera from Konosuba

● Physically strong and capable of basic magic

● Can absorb other beings into her body to gain their characteristics and grow stronger

● Due to the energies your were exposed to during The Incident the Xenoslimcubi’s Feeding characteristic was acquired, requiring the absorption of significant amounts of another creature’s fluids, or an intimate act performed with them (which will also result in the acquisition of significant fluids)

● The Celestial Menagerie reports that the Chaos Gacha’s archival of this entity is non-standard, lacking a canonical appendage that has carried over into your form

● You may reacquire the appendage by taking that as a characteristic from a creature

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Healing… Fluids, Rare Trait, Chaos Gacha - Gold Starter Ticket

● Your sweat, saliva, and intimate secretions (and also blood, but you probably want to keep that inside) create a healing effect that scales with your physical stats

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Expert Kama Sutra, Elite Skill, Chaos Gacha - Gold Starter Ticket

● Intimately familiar with detecting signs of arousal

● Capable of pleasuring partners in bed to a degree unmatched by most

● Due to your form’s innate magical knowledge and ability, you have access to simple Eromancy

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Modified Self Transformation>Chimeric Acquisition, Starter Power, Celestial Menagerie

● Usually this power would allow you to expend a use of a Summon to take on that creature’s form for 1 hour

● Due to The Incident, this power was sacrificed to lock your base form as that of a Growth Chimera approximating your original appearance

● You can gain one Characteristic from each of your Summons (but you’ll have to gather them manually)

● You can gain the standard version of this power by rolling it again

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Clawbringer Class, Starter Creature, Celestial Menagerie

● A Class from the Borderlands series spin off Tiny Tina’s Wonderland

● A faithful order of warriors that seek to commit deeds of heroism throughout the lands through fire and thunder (elements subject to change due to influences from The Incident)

● Allows the user to summon both a Spectral Hammer (due to The Incident this may also be summoned as a Spectral Phallus) and a Wyvern Companion

● The Class is permanent while the Wyvern acts as the Summon, the Spectral Hammer does not have a cooldown, its accompanying Action Skills do

● You gain access to the Skill Tree with one skill point (which due to The Incident has already been assigned)

● Due to The Incident, Gun Damage refers to any ranged attack or the pleasure you grant with your orifices, Melee Damage refers to any melee attack or the pleasure you grant via penetration, Wards refer to any force field-like item or ability (Like RWBY’s Aura or a Borderlands shield) and also apply as increased sexual stamina (a ward break acts as a sort of mini-climax), Damage Reduction also functions as a sexual stamina increase, and Damage itself also functions as various flavors of heightened pleasure

● Your skill point has been placed in the Indomitable skill, which upon entering Save Your Soul mode (0 HP) or Save Your Hole mode (climax) will instead result in their Ward being refilled and a scaling amount of Bonus Lightning Damage being applied to all attacks (and pleasure) for a short time, scaling with the number of ranks

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Well, that was a thing to wake up to. And also a lack of a thing to wake up to. With the announcement of missing appendages, that prompted an immediate lookover of my body. I cast the blanket aside and looked down upon my nude form.

Which uh, was both not attired in the manner I had gone to bed in as well as not exactly the sex I had gone to bed as. I wasn’t sure if you could exactly call my form feminine, as my chest was flat as a pancake, but other bits of me were definitely signs of traditional womanhood.

Standing up, I’m pretty sure that my height was about the same and so was my weight. But things had been shifted around a little bit. I was narrower in the waist and significantly broader in the hips and butt than I recalled being.

So I was now a guy in a gal’s body, and I was going to have to get it on with another guy in order to get my junk back. Wait. Would it be my junk, or would I end up with a copy of that guy’s junk?

I covered myself up with the blanket and looked around my designated room. Unless I wanted to go out the windows, my only method of exit was a stairway in the opposite corner of the room as my bed. The room’s layout looked familiar, not somewhere that I’d been before, but something that I’d seen. Well, aside from it being decorated by HR Giger Interior Designs.

There was a closet on the wall that my bed was against, opposite the computer setup and the stairway. Oh goddammit. I had clothes, but for some reason not only were they all girls’ clothes, but they were all copies of the exact same outfit.

Okay. So I had summoning powers. Maybe my summon would be male and be… amiable to getting one rubbed out so that I could get my dick (or a dick) back. Ugh. Why was I even contemplating this? It wasn’t like getting banged by a dragon had ever crossed my mind, though for some reason I suddenly found the idea kind of… hot for some reason?

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[Your Summons are equipped with enough intellect to be able to follow any orders you give so long as you have a method to communicate said orders to them. Verbally will suffice. Their individual dispositions towards you will initially be positive, though they will be flavored through the Summons’ own nature. Master, trainer, friend, pet, and yes, mate, are all possible states for your Summons to have initially.]

[They will consent to having resources extracted from them, so long as the process is not harmful. You could trim your wyvern’s horns, for example, and they would be fine with it, as they would be restored within 24 hours or upon the next summoning.]

[Production of intimate fluids for use with Chimeric Acquisition is covered under this rule.]

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Great. So it seemed like my critters were perfectly happy to let me get ‘em off so that I could power myself up. Good to know.

I got myself dressed with the single option I had available to me. A midriff exposing top, a jacket that I could zip up to cover most of my tummy (but would expose it again if I lifted my arms even slightly), a skirt that just barely covered my underthings, the aforementioned underthings, thigh high socks, some sneakers that seemed a bit oddly oversized on the outside but were comfy on the inside, and a hat with a familiar logo on it that I could stick my ponytail through. My hair was orange, for some reason. Not like normal orange, but ORANGE orange, like the fruit, like carrots, like cheese curls.

There was even a full-length mirror on the closet’s door that allowed me to look at myself. Okay, if my reflection wasn’t my reflection, but was actually some girl, I’d think she was pretty cute. But this was not how I was supposed to look, and I wanted it changed ASAP.

Okay, why did a chill go down my spine the moment I thought that?

So I suppose I’d better check out what was downstairs. Having somebody walk in on me and my wyvern might be a bit awkward and… well… I wasn’t sure just how big the wyvern was. He might not fit down the stairs and I’d have to unsummon and resummon him.

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[A particular Summon will last until they are slain or unsummoned. Each Summon can be called upon once per calendar day.]

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Ugh. Yeah, if he didn’t fit, I’d have to go without the one actual thing my powerset had provided me that was actually useful. Pretty much my whole damned build was based around fucking, or in the case of Healing Fluids, at the very least smooching or licking being involved. Stupid Xenoslimcubus Parabolic Sex Ray. Whatever the fuck that was.

Wait. Hold on.

The Clawbringer Class actually DID give me one other power, albeit an altered one. I could summon a Spiritual Hammer or a Spiritual Phallus. Umm… did the Spiritual Phallus… you know… actually feel sensation? Considering that the “normal” mode was something you were supposed to fling around the battlefield, I didn’t think so, but I might as well try, right?

Okay. Go-Go-Gadget Spiritual Phallus. Um… okay. That’s pretty damned big. Considering that the standard version was a massive fantasy warhammer, I shouldn’t be surprised that the Phallus mode was also similarly massive.

I gave it a stroke and felt nothing. Well, no, I did feel something. Just rubbing it felt kind of nice, but the feeling was on parts I had rather than parts I didn’t. I hefted the girthy thing in one hand and slapped it against the other. Okay, so it seemed like the function of the Spiritual Hammer was to inflict damage and pain, and the Spiritual Phallus inflicted pleasure upon impact.

I’d have to fiddle with it later. There was probably a way to get it to work something along the lines of what I wanted, but I wasn’t going to play with it (and also myself) amidst the great unknown.

It was time to head downstairs and discover what horrors awaited me.

-o-

Okay, so the horrors? Turns out it was a kind of cute bird guy sitting in a kitchen/dining room/living room combo. Dude was all black feathers, a lighter shade of black for his scaled hands and feet and his beak, a pair of wings on his back, and a pair of glasses nestled atop his beak. He too seemed to have to had suffered the indignity of being forced into feminine attire, as with his wings he was limited to a very clingy halter top, ridiculously short Daisy Dukes, striped thigh high socks with matching arm warmers, and a similar set of weirdly oversized sneakers, though his were shaped differently to accommodate his obviously avian feet. We collectively looked like the backroom of a Femboy Hooters.

“Why are you a bird?” I asked, rummaging through the fridge.

He looked about as confused about his location and circumstances as I was, so I figured I might as well chat about the situation properly fed and hydrated.

“You can’t just ask somebody why they’re a bird!” he protested.

“I did, though,” I replied, taking a half-gallon of orange juice (or what I hoped was orange juice) out of the uncomfortably biological looking fridge, “So why are you a bird?”

He sighed, “Result of a one night stand at a mythological mixer. An Angel of Mercy shacked up with one of Odin’s ravens and I was the result. I’m… I’m… dammit, why can’t I remember my name?”

“Well, I’m… uh… also having the same problem.”

“I woke up in the basement. Came up here, had some breakfast. Found out that I had some kind of a mental block where I just couldn’t leave.”

Well, the front door was right there. I took two steps towards it, and then found myself turning around and sitting right back down at the table.

“Crap. I can’t leave either.”

“Maybe we’ve got to go together?” he offered.

I nodded and took his hand, “Okay. Let’s try that.”

But instead of walking out the door we ended up on the sofa gazing into each other’s eyes and holding hands. He looked kinda cute, and he made me feel all weird and tingly down below. He let out a soft gasp and his facial feathers fluffed up a bit in the avian analog of a blush.

“Wh-what’s going on?” he stammered, trying to ignore the growing tent in his pants.

“I-I don’t know either! I’m just… really horny all of a sudden and I think you’re super cute.”

My arousal was getting absolutely out of hand. Was this normally how girls felt when they got randy? If it was, how the hell did they keep themselves from pouncing the nearest guy?

Fuck it. If whatever this is is going to force us into getting it on, I might as well experiment with my own powers.

Go-Go-Gadget Tallywhacker!

This time I summoned the Spiritual Phallus with a particular shape and purpose in mind. And all of a sudden I had a delicious fullness in my loins and a tightness in my panties. I scooted forward and rubbed our bulges together, kissing my corvid companion on the beak.

Drawing upon the one skill that I’d been given in this whole thing, I slipped one hand down into his shorts and used the other to tease his beak open to allow for a deeper kiss. Oh wow, they weren’t kidding about the amount of expertise in carnal matters that Expert Kama Sutra granted. I managed to somehow unbutton and unzip his fly while caressing his shaft on the downstroke, and then pulling it free on the way back up.

I continued to caress him and I hooked my thumb into the elastic band of my panties, squishing our members together. I’d sized the Spiritual Phallus to allow for our cocks to comfortably fit together in my grip. I somehow knew exactly how much he was packing with just a glance. Weird as this whole experience was, it was still kind of fun.

And that’s when my Ward shattered.

I could feel my inner walls clamp down and all of a sudden the conjured dick felt a whole lot more real to me. I tensed, but unlike the climaxes I was familiar with, the Ward break brought me a slow, continuous flow. It was more like a hot spring bubbling up and my hand was covered in hot, slick, sticky goo that just made it feel all the better to jerk the two of us off in tandem.

I gleefully suckled my cute little birb’s tongue as he thrusted needfully against me. Oh fuck, oh fuck, I was going to cum. I was supposed to be the expert here! Well, fine then! Let’s see how he likes Cleansing Flames!

White hot pleasure shot through me as I drew back and then thrust against him, the impact creating literal flashes of flame that swirled around and over his body, igniting bliss rather than burning clothing or flesh, and the surge of magical pleasure made his body tense. He let out a cute little squeak and arched his back, but I wasn’t finished yet!

I slipped over the edge into climax, and I too found myself tensing and pressing against my lover as hard as I could. I squeezed our cocks together tightly and I could literally hear his balls tighten as he came.

But just as I tumbled over the edge, my bliss surged even higher as Indomitable kicked in. My Spiritual Phallus erupted with glowing goo, stickily splattering all over the two of us, sparking where it landed against flesh and sending surges of electric bliss racing down from where it landed directly right back into our groins, and then surging out into the other’s member, and then up our spines to where it passed between us once more as we were locked in a ravenous kiss.

My magical might somehow seemed to kick him straight into a state of even more intense orgasm. His cum splattered all over our chests, necks, and faces. But I didn’t mind, because my feeble Ward’s boost in sexual stamina was easily blown right through, and I joined my partner in painting our bodies with my seed, though mine was purely ectoplasmic. Translucent and glowy, but lacking the sparks of my first climax.

Oh fuck, what would this feel like with a real dick instead of the kludged together magical sex toy I’d used?

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[You have performed an intimate act with Nameless Bird Boy and have managed to acquire significant enough fluids in order to acquire a Characteristic with Chimeric Acquisition.]

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Yup. Penis. Cock ‘n balls. Meat and veg. Twig and berries. Give it back.

I moaned as my phantom phallus was forcibly unsummoned as my restored junk surged into full arousal. Umm… I didn’t expect to keep the ladybits behind my sack, but okay. I guess I’ll deal with having that too.

“By the gods, how the fuck are you already hard again?” the bird panted, “I’ve got splooge all over my glasses I came so hard!”

Rather than go back into the full swing of things, I just hugged him tightly (and goopily) against me. Just because I could keep going didn’t mean I should.

And that was when I heard the slow clapping.

“Oh Em Gee, you guys! That was sooooo cute!” came a squee from the front door.

“But for real! You guys started without me! I wanted to get this body and these clothes just perfect for our meeting! ‘Cause we’re going to be monster slaying and monster laying rivals! I was gearing up to explain how things work, but noooo! You just had to discover that the “If you make eye contact you must fight” rule doesn’t work quite right when you can’t call upon your critters!”

The new femboy clasped his hands together and kicked up one leg behind him, “When two monster tamers gaze into one another’s eyes it’s true love and they just HAVE to get it on. Which is why I strategically shaped this body to not have eyes so I don’t have to fight or fuck anybody I don’t want to!”

I was staring at a bright purple Xenomorph with a huge ass, open toed platform heeled sneakers that showed off his pink painted toenails, mismatched neon fishnet stockings, neon fishnet t-shirt, more mismatched neon fishnet gloves, the smallest band logo cut off t-shirt I’d ever seen, and an assortment of chrome and leather strap jewelry that would make him a JRPG protagonist.

Goddammit.

That’s where I recognized the room from. It literally WAS the bedroom of a JRPG protagonist, the Pokemon Trainer.

I had to avert my gaze from the clash of neon colors that extended from toe to top with some ridiculous blonde 80s hair with neon tips, a rainbow of dangly day glow earrings dangling from each ear, and of course as the magenta cherry on top of this sundae of eye-searing style were his big, glistening, shockingly pink dick sucking lips.

I wasn’t sure if it was something about him, something that all these changes had awoken in me, or if this was just me being catapulted head first into discovering a new fetish that I would never have managed to happen upon on my own.

“Anyways, let’s go outside and meet your monsters!”

He paused.

“Though maybe you two should clean yourselves up first. S’why I thought ahead and got you two a whole closet full of spares, ‘cause I expected you to get all gooey and gushy, but not this quickly. There’s the main bathroom and a shower in the master bedroom, just through here.”

He motioned to the door.

“You can call me Ametrine, or Amy for short! Cause like the gem I’m yellow and purple!”

He pointed to me, “Hmm, you can be Stonestone, since you’ve got orange hair, and we’ll call ya Sunny!”

And the bird got to be third, “Well, there’s not a lot of black gemstones, but you’re totally rocking the green and black stripey socks. So you can be Idocrase.”

“Nido!” the bird cried, “That’s what my name is!”

“Okay, okay, you can be Nido for short. It’s not as cute of a nickname as Ame or Sunny, but I suppoooooose I can give you a little leeway considering the circumstances.”

“What circumstances?” I asked.

“Oh, you’ll see. Anyway! Welcome to the World of Apocalypse Monsters, it’s the end of the world and everybody is invited!”