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Slutcat climbed the entry stairs inside of Dragonreach and was accosted by a rather formidable Dunmer woman.

"What's the meaning of this interruption? Jarl Balgruuf is not receiving visitors."

"Whoa! Spent a little too much time in the tanning bed? Relax, I have news of the dragon attack at Helgen. Besides, exactly where do you think I might be smuggling a weapon? Wait... on second thought, don't answer that."

The Dunmer put away her sword. "You are not appropriately dressed to meet the Jarl, Khajiit," she said haughtily, "But I suppose the dress habits of catfolk may be somewhat different from ours here in Whiterun. He will want to talk to you personally. Come."

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Slutcat and Sworddog followed her to a man who sat on what Slutcat could only assume to be a throne, though it looked like little more than an overly-embellished chair.

"So, you were at Helgen? You saw this dragon with your own eyes?"

"Well, mostly I was looking down at the business end of a chopping block, but yes. Nice beard by the way!"

"Thank you Khajiit. You have nice... a nice... you look nice," the Jarl finally concluded before arguing with a bald man beside him. Finally he commanded the Dunmer woman, Irileth, to send guards to Riverwood to protect it from the dragon.

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"Er... I don't think that will be necessary sir," Slutcat said. "I've just spent the last day there and nothing..."

But the Jarl was busy with the bald man beside him who would have slunk away with his tail between his legs, if he'd had any tail. Irileth left to carry out the Jarl's command, leaving her and Sworddog alone with the man.

"Well done. You sought me out, on your own initiative. You've done Whiterun a service, and I won't forget it. Here, take this as a small token of my esteem."

With that he handed her a piece of armor. She accepted it gratefully and stowed it in her Inventory, knowing it was unlikely to ever be worn but she knew she could always sell it. She considered if it might bring more if she could get him to autograph it, but remembered that it was unlikely he knew how to write.

He continued, "There is another thing you could do for me. Suitable for someone of your particular talents, perhaps."

"Oh Mr. Jarl! We've only just met, but I'd been hoping... Certainly! I would love to show you my talents! I'm told I'm particularly gifted at 'oral' but a man of your distinction would have to be the judge of that. However, I would really love to feel your beard against my..."

But the Jarl wasn't done talking, "Come, let's go find Farengar, my court wizard."

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"Another? It's a bit kinky, but given my recent dry spell I'm game for anything!" Slutcat said as she followed the Jarl to a room nearby.

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The man the Jarl introduced her to was clad in a wizard robe and obviously was a person of some note here. "Farengar, I think I've found someone who can help you with your dragon project. Go ahead and fill her in with all the details."

Suddenly Slutcat realized her mistake.

"Just... dragon stuff is all you want me for?" she said forlornly to the Jarl before he left them.

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"Oh well. I guess I was aiming too high," Slutcat said after the Jarl had left the room. She turned her attention to the Mage.

"You know," she said. "I'm a bit of a mage myself..."

Slutcat hopped onto his desk and sprawled across it seductively.

"Want to make some magic?"

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"Everyone's a mage it seems. No cat, what I really want is an artifact hidden in Bleak Falls Barrow. It's called the Dragonstone and shows where all the dragons are buried throughout Skyrim!"

"Oh," Slutcat said, producing the Dragonstone from her inventory. "You mean this little thing?"

"The DRAGONSTONE? How did you get that?!"

"Some guy in Riverwood needed me to fetch something from the Barrow. I found this while I was in there. What will you give me for it?"

"Give you? I've got some spells and the like... and a little coin if that's what you're after."

"What I'm after, Gandalf, is a man. Right here. Right now..." she said and struck a pose that left absolutely no doubt as to what she wanted.

"Oh my! You're certainly... flexible!"

"You've no idea. Listen Merlin, I really really need a man right now and you're the one I've got. Now don't be coy, let's see what you've got under those robes!"

"The name is Farengar Secret-Fire, cat. I've heard you Khajiits get really frisky when you're in heat though. Just for the sake of my research of course - let's do this!"

"Finally!" Slutcat said, leaning back and getting comfortable. "Let's see about that Secret Fire! Plow me like your grandfather's 40 acres!"

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"Farengar!" came the voice of Irileth. "Farengar, you need to come at once. A dragon's been sighted nearby."

The mage quickly readjusted his clothing as the Housecarl of Dragonsreach ran into the room.

"GODDAMMIT!!!" Slutcat screamed.

"A dragon! How exciting! Where was it seen? What was it doing?" Farengar asked Irileth excitedly.

Slutcat swung around and exposed her ass to Farengar, "How about this way? Cats can do doggy!"

But her attempt was doomed to failure as Farengar left the room with Irileth.

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"I'LL DO AAAAAAAAAAANAL!!!!" Slutcat screamed across the palace.

"Give it up girl, it's not happening," Sworddog said. "Though the doggy style was a nice touch."

The cat began to cry.

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Irileth came back in then, "Keep it down slut cat! Now follow me. The Jarl wants you too."

Slutcat sniffled but climbed down off the desk.

"Wow!", she said to Sworddog as she followed the Dunmer, her mood improving. "How did she know my name?"

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