FSE

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Love is not something that everyone finds easy to show, or to find. But me... I... well, I love it. :3 To show that, this series of short, single-scene stories is all about the many aspects of love.

Love Is... Being Shamelessly Silly Together On A Night Out!

"Go on then... hit me with your best."

Resting her head on her paws and twirling a strand of her long, black hair around one finger, Emma gazed challengingly across the table at the male border collie sitting there. He stared back, grinning with fierce determination and lifting his paws into the air before her, cracking his knuckles loudly. What did that vixen know about his best?! When he was done with Emma they'd be picking her up off the restaurant floor!

"Alright then, I will!"

The collie's eyes sparkled with mischievous glee. He held his paws up before the female, ensuring he had her full attention before commencing. He looked around them at the other diners, at the waiters, at the door to the kitchen a short distance away. Only when he was convinced that he would not be interrupted did he begin.

"Why did the dinosaur cross the road?"

Emma smirked.

"Because chickens hadn't been invented yet! Sorry Martin... but you'll have to do better than that."

The collie looked crestfallen, but swiftly pulled himself back together and pointed an accusing finger at the female sitting across from him. Between them a candle flickered, illuminating a small, polished wooden table, two wine glasses and a bottle with a few glasses worth of liquid missing from it. There was no food on the table, and with both of them having ordered hot desserts it would be a few minutes before they arrived. Martin knew he still had time, but knew that now it was all the more imperative that he succeeded in his quest to make Emma laugh with one of his jokes! He'd failed to do so on their first date, and ever since then each time they went out together Martin made it his aim to make his girlfriend collapse in a fit of the giggles.

Needless to say, he'd yet to succeed.

"Okay, how about this one. Why did the turkey cross the..."

In a moment of perhaps unnecessary cruelty, Emma answered before the collie had even finished asking. She was smiling more widely than ever though, still amused by these old and corny jokes that Martin seemed only to have discovered recently even though she'd heard them ever since she was a cub!

"Because there was a vegetarian Thanksgiving on the other side! Honestly Martin, where did you get these jokes, 1001 Funnies from 1001 BC?"

The male's eyes narrowed, a soft growl escaping his throat. Emma growled back, and they both grinned. They linked hands across the table, both rose out of their chairs slightly, and gave one another a quick peck on the lips before settling back down into their seats.

"Don't think I'm gonna go easy on you just because we're dating... I'm gonna get you this time! Why did the chewing gum cross the road!?"

Emma almost felt bad for knowing the answer to that one, as it really was quite funny. She dared not try to fake a laugh though, not after the time when she'd tried in the local park and a passing police officer had thought that she was choking on something!

"Because it was stuck to the chicken's foot?"

The collie saw Martin's eyes darting towards the kitchen just after she delivered her answer, and following his gaze saw the waiter that had been serving them emerge with two white porcelain bowls. Their eyes snapped back towards one another at precisely the same moment, and Emma wordlessly urged the collie-dog to have one last try. He nodded resolutely, leaned forwards, and whispered in a low, intimate voice...

"Why did the dead baby cross the road?"

Opening her muzzle purely out of habit, Emma froze as she thought about it and suddenly realised that she didn't know the answer. She looked all ready to respond, and already could see the accepting resignation of defeat in her lover's eyes, which made it that much more horrible when the vixen closed her muzzle again and shook her head.

"No... I... I don't know that one."

Martin almost began laughing himself he was so relieved! She hadn't heard it, and it was the best of the bunch. The vixen had looked so confident too, and now where was she? Up the river without a punch line! A punch line which he would now deliver. Puffing up his chest with pride and importance, Martin leaned in even closer. To his delight Emma leaned in too, until they were almost nose to nose over the candle flickering at the centre of their table. The waiter was getting closer and closer all the while. He only just had enough time to reel it off uninterrupted, but he had to do it right then and there if it was to have maximum impact.

"Because with enough superglue... you can make a chicken stick to anything!"

A split second later a new figure appeared beside their table. Dressed in a smart white shirt with the restaurant's name written across its breast pocket, their rabbit waiter cleared his throat and the two canids rapidly withdrew from their close-quarters conversation. Martin was grinning madly, staring intently at the vixen who had suddenly come over very quiet. Her face looked slightly scrunched up, and it took him a moment to realise why. Emma was biting her bottom lip! She was biting it to keep from laughing, and by the way her eyes were getting wider and wider, it was a losing battle that she was fighting with her sense of morality!

The waiter placed a perfectly formed individual treacle tart in front of Emma, who nodded silently and flashed him a smile which quivered at the corners before she could suppress it again, and a hot fudge sundae before Martin.

"Will that be everything for now?"

Martin smiled, and looked searchingly towards Emma. She shot him a furious glance as the waiter turned, but smiled again and nodded hurriedly. The waiter looked a little bemused by her rather over-eager response, but nodded curtly back and turned away to attend another table.

The moment his back was turned, Emma stuffed her left paw's index finger into her muzzle and bit down on that instead, her lips curling into an unstoppable, quivering grin as she began to shudder with silent mirth. She looked desperately at Martin, as though hoping he could say or do something to stop her. The collie just smirked evilly back though, and thought inwardly that she should have known better than to trust him when it came to joke-telling.

"Baaaaaawk..."

Under his breath, so only Emma could hear, Martin did his very best chicken impersonation. The vixen's eyes widened in horror, whimpering and shaking her head pleadingly.

"Bk-bk-bk-baaaaaaaawwwk!"

A little louder this time. Emma snorted, then giggled. She slapped a paw over her muzzle, trying to muffle the sounds of her laughter as they began to grow to audible levels. Her sharp green hues glared at Martin, trying their best to look venomous, but even they were beginning to sparkle with tears of her barely contained laughter. She knew that if he did the slightest bit more, she'd explode. Worse than that though, was knowing that he knew it too.

"Baaaawk! Bk-bk-bk-bk-baawwwwk!"

As the collie turned his arms into stubby wings at his sides, flapping and jutting his head out towards Emma like a chicken as he clucked some more, the vixen knew she was done for. She whimpered once more, and promptly began to giggle madly, louder and louder. She clung to the table to keep herself from falling off her chair just as Martin had promised she would, fighting to control herself as all around her the other diners began to shoot furtive, curious and amused glances in the direction of the vixen rapidly descending into fits of laughter. Her whole body shook with the force of it, and she had to close her eyes to blink away the tears streaming down her cheeks.

From beyond the sounds of her own frantic giggling she heard footsteps approaching, felt a shadow fall over her, and heard the waiter asking her if everything was okay. She looked up, red faced and eyes streaming, still shaking with mirth. The first thing she saw was the rabbit, looking shocked and amused in equal quantities to see that his most attractive customer of the night was not in fact in any difficulty, just laughing at some unknown and unfathomable reason. The second thing she saw however made everything so much worse. Sitting across the table, taking a spoonful of sundae and looking just as confused and entertained as everyone else, Martin appeared as though he had no idea whatsoever what his date for the evening found so funny. Thus Emma could only assume that everyone watching thought she was laughing at something she alone had seen or heard!

About half a minute later, when the vixen had recovered, caught her breath and told the waiter rather tersely that she was fine, she glared at Martin as he took another leisurely spoonful of sundae. Seeing his nonchalant expression, Emma grinned savagely. The collie's eyes flashed in a moment of pure, brilliant improvisational humour, and he lowered his spoon just long enough to utter a simple question.

"What's so funny?"

That, needless to say, was a mistake.

"Ow!"

Martin exclaimed loudly as Emma kicked him in the shin under the table, then promptly lowered her head and began to eat her treacle tart. The whole restaurant stared that time, eager to see what new drama was unfolding at that mad couple's table. Their waiter also looked over, and as Martin accidentally met his gaze, nodding weakly in recognition that he'd done something wrong, he couldn't help but notice an expression of mild annoyance flitting across the rabbit's features.

"Now that..."

The vixen's soft voice drew his attention back to his immediate surroundings, cheeks flushing to match the way Emma's had been shortly before and his blue eyes gazing keenly at the female. She was still looking down at her meal to begin with, but just as she uttered the end of that sentence in a playful undertone her gaze rose to meet his once again.

"...was funny."

Despite the residual ache in his ankle, Martin grinned, and despite the fact that the whole restaurant was still watching them out of the corner of their eye, Emma beamed back. Once more a paw from each of them slid out across the table, gripping the other's own limb with an affectionate squeeze.

Without another word they resumed eating, still hand in hand, and remained that way until it was time to pay the bill.

By Jeeves