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I've been hurting a lot on a particular Friday afternoon. And I'm tired of it, I know I have to work through this but I need to let up a bit. I go downstairs and I beg Edward to talk to me for a bit. And we sit at the kitchen table. "Claude, you're upset at Rory's staying away from you still" Edward says. I nod. "He's overwhelmed, he wonders if it was his fault, that he upset you and made you feel so alone that you had to run" Edward says quietly. "Did you see it in advance?" I ask him. Edward cries hard. (I knew he did, but I still had to ask) And he nods. "I could not warn you, and I knew it could not be avoided, Claude, it almost killed me" he says weeping hard. I hug him. "I do understand Edward, I don't think I could have coped seeing it and knowing I couldn't stop it or ease the pain from it" I say holding him tightly. "You've always understood me and my gifts" he says quietly. "I love you, Edward" I say hugging him tighter. "My Fox's gift can sometimes be a curse, when it's something bad for those he loves so" I say taking him into my lap and rocking him. He's calming down a bit. He smiles at me. "I'd do that with you when you were younger and upset" he says softly. "It always worked, Edward, I wanted my Fox to know he was loved, same way you always made me feel loved when you did it" I say. He kisses me.

"Claude, no one knows what to do to help you, so they just give you space, not knowing how much more it hurts you, Nigel doesn't know but he's just trying to be there for you, and he knows on some level it helps" Edward says. I nod. I'm quiet for a bit. And I realize the more I've processed things the less I know of what I need to actually do.

"Edward, what do I do here?" I ask. "Quit hiding from life, so animals know what happened to you, but your patients love you, a lot of them probably worry for you, you have to rejoin the world now, move forwards as I have always taught you to, forgive those who love you for not knowing how to help you, and forgive yourself, you had no idea what would happen" Edward says. "You felt guilt too, that you'd gotten yourself into it, and you'd of fucked any one of those guys if they hadn't of forced you to" Edward says. I smile. Edward's right I would have. (Something is about to happen that will strengthen my will. To make me see how and why I need to jump back into life, Something I'd of never expected at all. But eventually I'll learn not to try to anticipate what my Roo will do next. He may be as much of a genius as I am, but he's playful and easy going, and so wonderfully unpredictable. And he'll do anything to show me how much he loves his Lion.)

The door bell rings and Edward gets up and answers it. He's carrying a huge bunch of roses of all different colors and he hands me a note that came with them. They're so beautiful and so fragrant. But I forget that when I read the note. It's exactly what I most needed to hear. Paulie's as big hearted as I thought he'd be.

"Claude,

I heard what happened ta ya, mate. I was really sorry ta hear, I hope ya get well soon. Teddy says ya was pretty upset and hurting, and wouldn't speak ta no one, so I thought I'd send ya some flowers that were almost as pretty as ya are. I hope ya don't think this too cheeky of me, but I wanna go out witcha some time when ya heal. And if ya mad at Teddy ya won't come back ta the Den, so I had ta let ya know I was interested. I know now I shoulda come talked ta ya that night, maybe ya wouldn't of been hurt so bad. I wanted ta but I didn't know how ya'd respond ta me. Ya looked at me and ya kept smiling at me. I see it now. Ya wanted ta let me know ya was interested, hoping this ole Roo would pick up on it and come ta ya. Ya were giving me the choice ta come ta ya or not as I wanted ta. Sorry I didn't see it then as I sure as shit would have come ta ya. Ya made me so hot, and I wanna get ta know ya better. I'd o come ta the Hospital but I thought ya needed ta heal a bit first. I'd never hurt ya, Claude, never.

Claude, I do get that ya might be too upset ta get with anyone fer a while. But I'll be as slow and gentle witcha as ya need me ta be. Even if it takes ya awhile before ya ready ta have sex. I wanna get ta know ya too. This ole Roo doesn't wanna just root ya and hop away, he wants ta see if ya might want more from his raggedy ass. Please let me know. My phone number is......... Call me if ya wanna go out, or if this old Roo can do anything fer ya. I hope ta hear from ya when ya can cope. I think ya kind o like this ole Roo at least a bit. He sure likes ya a lot, and hopes ya like him too.

Dr. Paulie Jacob Christopher"

"He's certainly a very masculinely romantic Roo" I say softly. Edward smiles. "What?" I ask. "I can't tell you" he says. "He's gonna be mine one day?" I ask. Edward smiles and nods. "Eventually, but you two have a long road ahead before you get together, you have much healing to do, and Paulie needs to see how much he really does need you as his, he's avoiding settling down now, he wants to establish himself in his field." Edward says. I smile. "Still" I say wistfully. "He knows and he doesn't care, he knows how badly I was violated and he still wants me, Edward" I say trying to hide how it's affected me.. "He does, Master Claude, but remember what I said, don't rush this, take the time you'll need, I swear you'll know when it's time and when it's right, I've seen that" Edward says. I hug him. "I get it, Edward, if I heard you right, I have to wait for him, he has to sort his own life out while I heal" I say softly. "You did get it, he'll beg you to belong to him, and then and only then do you let him know how badly you want him" Edward says. "I can do it, I am sure now, I have to get over this, I was trying too hard, but I'm so different inside now" I say quietly. "You are, Claude, you've been through hell and you have to cope with the changes it's made in you" Edward says. I nod.

"Edward, I see it now I think, he's what I really need now, he'll help get me comfortable with sex again, he said he'd be as soft, patient and gentle as I needed him to be, and he'll want to go out at times, when his work lets him, but he'll not want to settle for a while, gives me a chance to heal and throw this off" I say softly. "If I end up with him after all of that happens, I"ll be a happy Lion for life" I say softly. Edward kisses me. "That's my Lion son" he says smiling. (It won't quite work out that way, he'll sort his life out very quickly once I lay it out to him that I do care and want to mate him, but it has to be when it's right for both of us.)

"I have one more thing I have to tell you, Claude" Edward says "Paulie will be your first after your gang rape, and he will be loving and gentle and he'll ease your fears and make you want sex again, but under no circumstances should you discuss bonding with him, he'll run from you now if you do, he wants to take his time and build his career, but he'll see soon enough that he can't live without you, and he'll be the one to bring it up" Edward says. "I get it, I'm not in any shape to belong to anyone now anyway" I say. "You do get it, now you have to start healing and you have to make a few amends" Edward says. I know where to start I think.

I go to Marcus and Al's room. They're laying curled up. I get into bed with them and they cuddle me "Papa Al, Papa Marcus, I'm so sorry, I went through so much, and I have to apologize, you wanted to help me but I didn't give you much of a chance to do anything" I say softly. Al hugs me and for only the third time since I've known him. He cries. "It almost killed me, to know what those ...what they'd...how badly they'd violated my cub, and I was so helpless, not even knowing how to help you" Al says holding me. "I know" I say quietly. "It helped when Marcus told me you'd forgiven us" he says. "I'm a long way from healed but I had to start rejoining the world, I spoke to Edward and he helped me see things as I needed to" I say quietly. "I know you guys love me, and I was hurting badly, Jonas has helped me work through so much of it, and I was upset at Rory mostly, but things there will never be the same" I say quietly. Al strokes my mane. "Claude, he hurt to see you like that" he says. "He never came to see me, how would he know how I was?" I ask archly. "He didn't?" Marcus asks. "No, unless he came while I was asleep but the nurses would have told me I'm sure, they asked me why my twin brother never came to see me" I say sharply. "He even saw one or two of his patients in the ICU but never came to me or even asked about me according to the nursing staff" I say angrily. "Jonas thinks he's transferred the bond he and I had to Jeff, and I can't really complain about that, as Jeff is his mate, but I didn't expect to be totally abandoned by him" I say sounding more cross than I meant to.

"Claude, we'll talk to him" Al says. "No, Papas, I'd rather you didn't, we'll either work this out or we won't, but for once I think it's best to leave it to fate, if he still loves me he'll find his way back to his twin brother" I say quietly. "I'll be cordial at minimum, but he needs to see he still loves and needs me" I say firmly. "Papa Al, it's time I grew up, and I know I love you two and I'll always need my Dads, but I have to start standing on my own foot paws, even if one of them is damaged" I say softly. "He's growing up, Al" Marcus says. "I'll always need my Daddies" I say cuddling them both. They hold me and we talk a bit.

"Claude, who sent that big bouquet of Roses?" Al asks. I laugh. I pull Paulie's note out of my pocket and hand it to him. He reads it. "He's a romantic fucker" Al says laughing. "He's about my size and he's an Australian born Red Roo" I say softly. "Is the one Nigel told me about?" Marcus asks. I nod. "I want to go out with him, I know I have to heal, but Teddy told me he was kind of devoted to his job, and he'd only want to date and fuck for a while" I say. "Do you know what he does for a living?" Al asks. He's got that protective Dad look on his face. "I do, I looked him up. Papa Al, he's got an MD and a PhD in Pharmacology and he's the head of a research team at Novartis, developing and refining drugs for them" I say smiling. Al looks impressed. (Paulie's playful and joyous nature hides a brilliant mind, his accent throws a lot of animals. But he's smarter than I am for sure. But he's a fun, playful, and unpredictable soul at heart Yet, all business when it comes to his work.)

"Claude, you know you always had that problem of jumping at guys, wanting to bond them right away" Marcus says. "I know, Jonas and I talked it out, I was trying to hurt myself more" I tell them. And I tell them what Jonas and I figured out about my self destructive streak and where it came from. Al and Marcus are silent while I explain. "You've really been working hard in therapy" Marcus says. "Well, Edward's helped a lot too, and it's time for me to get back out in the world" I say softly. "I'll call Janice tonight and have her start scheduling appointments for me, but I have something I need to do first" I say smiling. "I need to make amends to Teddy, I was cruel to him, granted I'd of been worse if I'd seen him, but it's time to make up and move on" I say smiling. I kiss them both and I get up.

I go to Nigel's room. "Got an errand to do, come with me, Nige?" I ask. Nigel nods. Horst is eyeing me cautiously. "I'm so sorry, Horst, I had no excuse for yelling at you, I'm calling Janice tonight I do need to get back into life" I say hugging him. "I'll call her, Liebchen, I'm so glad you're not mad at me" he says. "I wasn't really angry at you, more like at life, but that's over now" I say hugging him tighter. "I love you, Horst, you're too important to me to lose your love" I say quietly. "You sound better, almost better than you were before" Horst says looking into my eyes. "I am, Meister Horst, I see a lot of things I didn't before, and in some ways this was a wake up call I needed" I say. Nigel nods. "He knows?" Horst asks. "He does, I've talked about everything Jonas and I have worked out with him, I really needed our Badger, and he was amazing, he kept me from breaking down worse, Horst" I say. "And thanks for recommending Jonas to me, he's been a great therapist" I say. "He was perfect for my Liebchen, he is gentle yet firm and he will not let you evade things" Horst says smiling. "There was only one problem with him, Horst" I say. "What, Mein Claude?" he asks. "I'd sit and watch him, and I'd wonder how it would feel if I let him knot and/or turn me" I say smiling. Horst laughs. "He knows, he told me he was hot for you too, but you knew enough to know how to handle it" Horst says kissing me. "Good thing I could always let my German Grizzly tear my ass up" I tease him. He smiles. "When you've healed, I'd love to again" he murrs. I kiss him. "I will, I miss that big Ursine dick of yours, Meister Horst" I say softly.

"Claude, where are we going?" Nigel asks. "The Bear Den, I have to make amends with Teddy too" I say. "I saw the Roses, Claude" Nigel says. I hand him the note Paulie sent me. Horst reads it over Nigel's shoulder and he laughs. "He wants you" he says laughing. "I know, but he's busy, and it's what I need now, Horst, I need to heal and sort out my life, and he wants to break me back into sex after the gang rape, and we'll date and spend time, and maybe down the road more might happen, but only time will tell" I say smiling. Horst grins. "Mein Claude, is growing up" he says quietly. I kiss him. "Bout time don't ya think" I tease him.

"Ja, it is, but you still hurt over Rory's distancing himself" Horst says softly. I smile. "Not going to let me get away from facing things?" I tease him. "I can't do anything about it, I'm not going to go running to him, he's got his mate and I hope they're happy, he's my brother and we'll just have to wait and see how our relationship sorts itself out" I say. Horst looks impressed. "My little Lion" he murrs. "I am proud of you, Mein Claude" he says smiling. Nigel's dressed now. "Let me run change" I say. And I do. I hate the cane, but it's better than being in a wheelchair I suppose. I go to the living room. Nigel is waiting. Horst is in jeans and a t shirt. "He wants to go too, he wants to get a beer or two" Nigel says. I kiss Horst. "Of course our beloved German Grizzly is welcome to come too, but I'm driving" I say firmly. Horst laughs. "Didn't think you'd walk" he says smiling. I grin. Horst looks happy for me now.

And we go to my Mercedes S560. I drive to the Bear Den and I let them out at the door. I want to take Teddy by surprise. I park and I walk into the bar. Teddy's busy. I move up to where he is and I lean across the bar and kiss him. He's surprised alright. "Claude, I thought you were mad at me" he says surprised. "I was mad at life and I'm sorry I took it out on you Teddy" I say quietly. Teddy grins. I notice a little Black Bear glaring at me now.

"Claude, have you forgiven me?" Teddy asks. "I have and I'm sorry for even being mad at you, you've been too good to me and I do care about you" I say quietly. "Help me?" he whispers. "Anything for my 'Big Griz' " I say smiling Teddy murrs. I'd called him that while we were fucking and it made him hot. He loves it when I call him that. "Meet Jesse, my new mate" Teddy says. I turn to the Black Bear. "He's gorgeous, Teddy" I say happily. Jesse blushes. He is attractive. 5'10" 200 pounds, soft liquid Brown eyes, nice buff build. I shake his paw. And he seems nervous.

"Claude, my place is so small and such a mess, I'm ashamed to have him there, can we...?" He asks. "I'd love to have you guys live with us, I've wanted you to move in for a long time now" I say grinning. "Really?" Teddy asks. "Yeah, just was afraid you'd take it the wrong way, that you'd think I was going after you again" I say. Jesse takes my paw. "I heard, Claude, it must have been awful" he says. "It was, broke my heart that I couldn't bond my 'Big Griz' and make him mine" I say. Jesse looks puzzled and Horst and Teddy and Nigel are laughing. "Oh, you meant that thing in the park, well, it wasn't fun, especially since I'd of taken them all on anyway, though I'd of preferred that they hadn't of beaten me and all" I say smiling. Teddy cracks up. "Taking it well" he says "I'm amazing when you give me no other choice" I say winking at my 'Big Griz'.

"Jesse, understand me, I'd of been happy to be Teddy's, but we weren't meant to be, from the looks of things, you love him like I wished I could have, and his eyes light up when he looks at you, I want 'Big Griz' happy, and you're the one to do it now, not me, I'd love to have you guys as part of our little family" I say smiling. "Family?" Jesse asks. And Nigel explains who's living with us and tells him about the house. Teddy kisses me. "Thanks, Claude, he was a bit intimidated by you, and truthfully scared you'd try to take me from him" Teddy says. "I'd never do that, not even to get you" I say. Jesse and Nigel go sit and talk a while. I fill Teddy in on what Jonas and I had sorted out. "So you wanna still heal and take your time now" Teddy says.

I smile. And I walk over to the piano Teddy put in to get me to play for his customers. And I play a song I wrote while in the hospital. "Bad Day" And I can hear Teddy, Nigel and Horst laughing. But it sums things up in my mind. I play and sing 'It's Gonna Take Some Time This Time' and Horst smiles proudly at me. It will. I survived a hellacious ordeal. With my mind, my heart and my ass intact. Time to move on. I walk back to the bar and I sit. Takes a bit of time though, even with the cane. I hate this, but I can't change it, just have to adapt. (Paulie will help me adjust, he'll tease me about being happy knowing I can never run away from him.)

And my attention is diverted for a moment. Paulie walks in with a big, and extremely sexy Polar Bear. "Hey Paulie, hey Ignacio" Teddy calls out. Paulie looks my way and smiles deeply. "Surprised ta see ya here, mate" he says joyously. "I had to come make up with Teddy, my 'Big Griz' means too much to me not to" I say. Nigel's laughing as he's looking at us. "This is me best bud, Ignacio Montoya, he works with me" Paulie says happily. I shake his paw. He looks into my eyes. He has Deep Brown eyes and they're hot. I purr for a minute. "He is even more beautiful than you said, Paulie" Ignacio murrs in a deep Spanish accent. He's making deep eye contact with me. He very obviously wants me.

Ignacio is big. 7'2", 330 pounds of incredibly hot, White furred Polar Bear. Deep Brown eyes. Big paws and foot paws and a shining smile. "You're Hispanic?" I ask. "I am Cuban, Pretty Lion" he murrs. There is a fleeting look of annoyance on Paulie's face. Is he jealous of my obvious attraction to Ignacio? I'm momentarily torn between flirting with this huge and beautiful Polar Bear and talking to Paulie, and since he's here, I think it's a sign of some kind. I'm being rewarded for enduring my ordeal, and growing as a result. Apparently, God's trying to put us together here. Who am I to defy 'God's will'? And as I look at this big Roo, I know I love him. But we'll get there, when it's right and when we're meant to. Edward was right as always, I have to wait now. If he really is meant to be mine, it'll all happen as it's supposed to. And while I'd love being under this huge, gorgeous Polar Bear, I need to start getting to know Paulie more.

I take Paulie's paw and I kiss it. "Thank you for the beautiful Roses and the sweet note, Paulie, it meant a lot to me" I say smiling. He breaks out into a big grin. I gesture to the seat next to me and Paulie sits. Ignacio wanders over and sits by Jesse and Nigel. And they all talk a while.

Paulie looks so happy now. "So ya wanna go out with me?" he asks. "I would have called you later tonight, this just speeds things up" I say. "Claude, I won't deny how badly I want ya, but I want to be, well, I'll take this as slow as you need me ta" he says kissing my paw. "I'd be lying if I didn't tell you how much your eyes and sexy accent make me want to roll onto my back for you right here on this bar stool" I say smiling at him. He blushes. "Are ya, well, are ya healed enough?" he asks. I smile. "Dr Wallace says so, he's told me I can have anal sex now" I say quietly. "Are ya, is ya head ready for it?" he asks. "With a sweet and romantic male, who's willing to be gentle with me, and reassure me, I am" I say quietly. "Your note made me so happy, I really needed to hear that" I say softly. "Yah?" he asks. "You knew what happened, but you were treating me so sweetly, you were willing to take your time and be what I needed you to be, you let me know you wanted me, but while you were willing to deal with the aftermath, you didn't dwell on it, it made me feel special, Paulie" I say smiling at him. "I was afraid guys would see me as soiled and ruined, and you let me know how much you still wanted to be with me" I say nuzzling his cheek. "Claude, I wanted ya so bad, still do, I fought with Tommy that night, he told me I was in love with ya, and I don't know what to think about that" Paulie says. "I want more than to just root ya and hop away, I know that much, Claude" he says softly. I smile at him. "I could tell from your note, you do care for this slightly damaged Lion" I say kissing his muzzle. He grins. Such a sexy, almost lopsided grin. Like a little cub who's up to something. And it's hot as hell. He's looking unsure now though, like he's not sure how or what to tell me now. I see what Edward meant, he's not 100% sure of what he wants yet. And the slightest hint of coercion will have him running. Time to just open up and tell him what I most need now. And hope he'll understand that while I am very interested in him, I am going to look after my own needs first.

"OK,, we need to get this out in the open now, Paulie, I'm healing still, I know about you, Teddy talked to me that night" I say. "I know you want to focus on your work, I need to keep working on healing, from the gang rape and several other things" I say sharply. "If we go out with each other, I need you to be as you are, can we just date, have fun, and fuck and not look for anything more for right now?" I ask. Paulie grins. "I can deal" he says smiling. I can see him start to relax a lot. But that lopsided grin is back. He's thinking of something for sure.

"But what if down the road, I decide I wanna bond ya?" he asks playfully.. "We'll cross that bridge when we get there, you might not like me as much as you think you will, but Paulie I'll make you a promise, if you come to me, and tell me that you think it's time for us to settle down together, we'll sit down and work it out, is that OK?" I ask. He grins. "Would ya take ya Roo one day if he comes ta ya and he asks ya ta?" he asks smiling at me.. "If down the road, we decide we really do love each other, and we want to spend our lives together, then yeah, I will" I say quietly. "But we have to be sure and we have to be ready for it" I say softly."When that happens, no matter when it is, we'll bond then, and only then." I say quietly. He kisses me. "I do care fer ya, Claude, I'd love ta spend time witcha, can ya deal if I call ya up when I have free time, will ya see me when I want ya to?" He asks. "I'll make you a priority of my life, Paulie, you call, and unless I have something major or mostly likely, if I'm on call, then I will be happy to have you come see me and spend time with me" I say smiling. He grins. "I'll keep a place for you in my life, I swear, Paulie" I say quietly. He's grinning deeply now. (It's not lost on me how insistent he's being in finding out if I might take him one day. But Edward was right, I need to think of what I need too, though I know I really hope we do bond one day.)

"I'm a lucky Roo" he says joyously. Teddy's looking proudly at me. "You did good, Boy" he murrs in my ear. I call Edward. I want to tell him Teddy and Jesse are moving in. But I am aware he'd probably know anyway. "Have them come tonight and I'll have a late dinner for them and they can move in tomorrow" Edward says. "You played it beautifully, Claude, you kind of disarmed him, he'll give you all of his affections unhindered by his own fears, he knows you do care, and he'll realize he loves you, in fact, you've moved up his time table, he'll see it a lot sooner than he would have before" Edward says. "Thanks" I say. "I can't quite see when though, could be very soon or could be months from now, Claude" he says softly.

"Teddy, Edward wants you to come home tonight when you close the bar and he'll have a late dinner for you and Jesse and you can move in tomorrow" I say. Teddy kisses me. "It'd work out better for us, Eddie will take the bar tomorrow for me, and we can spend time together" he says. "Edward will give you both the house tour, though he knows you've been there before" I say quietly. Teddy waves Jesse over.

"How about us, ya think, ya....well..could we get together tonight? Paulie says softly. He's trying to be cool and calm, but his anxiety to get with me shows in his eyes. "How about I take you out to eat and then we'll talk" I say softly. "I'll make sure Horst and Nigel get home" Teddy says happily. I go tell Nigel and Horst I'm taking Paulie out to eat and Horst hugs me. "You did well, Mein protege, you keep to it and it will work out" he says. I hug him. And Nigel teases me about getting a shot at Paulie himself while he's with me. I kiss him. "We'll find a way, Baby Badger" I say grinning.(I will keep to my resolve to go slow, but the more I do the more Paulie sees how much he wants me, and doesn't want to wait that long. He'll beg me to take him a lot sooner than I would have figured on. I'm not fool enough to say no though. )

I walk over to Paulie and he takes my arm and puts it in his. He walks with me, and he's willingly walking as slowly as I have to with my cane. We get in my car. "Bloody Hell, this is a fancy one" he says. "I don't drive, Claude" he says quietly. "I'll take you anywhere you need to go, Big Roo, call me if you need to go somewhere, even if you don't have time to play" I say quietly. He murrs. "Ya do care fer ya Roo, at least a bit" he says smiling. "I do, Paulie, and I think you and I can have a lot of great times together" I say softly. Paulie grins. "I already know I enjoy spending time with my Paulie even with our clothes on" I tease him. And his eyes light up, and they're so beautiful.

I take him to a nice little place I know of. It's a nice little bistro with good food. We get seated and order. "I love this place" I tell him. He grins. "You look so beautiful tonight, Claude" he says and his eyes are shining at me. I blush. "Paulie, I wanted to go talk to you that night, but I was afraid, you were so beautiful and sexy" I say. (Not exactly true, he is beautiful and sexy, and I was afraid, but I was afraid I'd fall and not cope with him wanting only to date. Now, it's exactly what I need. And so is he)

Paulie blushes. "So ya think ya might wanna try ta...?" he asks and stops. "I know I do, it's why we're here, Dr Christopher" I say softly. "I knew when you sat down by me that was how our evening would end up, unless Ignacio was a play pal like Tommy and you had plans already" I say. "Nah, Nacho's a good friend, I was gonna find some hot little bottom and wear him out good, and I found you" Paulie says grinning. "I was going to call you tonight, I didn't know if we'd get together tonight, but it seemed to be right, going to apologize to Teddy and you were there" I say smiling. "I think I am one lucky Roo tonight" he says. "You will be soon enough" I say teasingly. "Hope he ain't mad at me though, fer ditching him" Paulie says. "I think there's a good chance Nigel and Horst will take him home and play" I say. "Horst will bottom for big Bears like Ignacio and Nigel's as big of a bottom slut as I am" I say softly. "Might wanna find that out one day soon" Paulie says. "I hope so, as he wants you as badly as I do" I say softly. Paulie grins.

And we eat and chat a bit. Just getting to know each other a bit. Paulie is charming, and warm and funny, and he's being very seductive too.. I'd usually be trying to impress him, or worrying if we'd bond. But now I am just being myself. I'm not trying to impress this hot, big Kangaroo. And he's very obviously courting me. Whether he knows it or not, he is. I can see it in his eyes, he's trying to impress me. No need, he has already, I know without a doubt, when it's time I'll take him, and be a happy, well loved Lion for the rest of my life. He's honest and sincere, and not afraid to show his feelings.. And I'm just sitting back enjoying myself here. It's nice to have someone court me, instead of me going after them. Paulie is fun to be with. He gets up and pulls my chair out for me. And he's being so attentive to me. We walk out to my car. His big ole grin gets deeper and it's so sexy.

"Claude, are ya, well, can we go home now, I'm so hot fer ya" he says putting my paw on the front of his pants. He's big and it's rock hard. I smile. "Ya don't have ta let me fuck ya if ya don't want ta yet, a bit o paw or ya muzzle would be fine, after we make out a bit" he murrs. "Claude, I'm dying ta cum on ya or in ya, please" he begs. "Paulie, I want you too, I want you to be the one to remind me how good fucking can be, I know you'll be as thoughtful and considerate as you have been all along, you're getting up my ass tonight, so calm down" I say softly. He grins. "I'm not sure why I'm so anxious here, mate, I want up ya so bad I can taste it" he says softly. "Do you know I want you up me that badly too, I want to look up into that sexy face and those gorgeous eyes while you fuck me" I say smiling. Paulie's murring loudly now. I drive us home. "Shit, ya got a big house, Kitty" he says softly. I smile.

We go in. Edward greets us. "Paulie Christopher, this is Edward Featherstone, our beloved family retainer, if you need anything at anytime you're here ask him for it" I say smiling. Edward smiles at Paulie. "So ya got a handsome Butler" Paulie says smiling."Thank you, Sir" Edward says softly. "Claude" I hear from behind us. "Paulie, this is my Papa Marcus and his mate, Papa Al" I say softly. They all shake paws. "He's an impressive male" Al says smiling. "We raised him and his twin brother, Rory and he's our son, I hope you'll be good to him" Al says. I smile. And I explain to them both about how things are between Paulie and I. Al grins, and Marcus smiles. "You'll always be welcome here, Dr Christopher" Marcus says smiling. I give Paulie a quick tour. He loves the pool and hot tub. "Want to get in?" I ask. "If it's you, yeah" he murrs. I pull off my clothes and get in the tub. Paulie flings his clothes off. I take a good look at him.

He's gorgeous. He's got the beginnings of a pot belly. About five or ten pounds now. (He'll gain more over time, but since I find it hot on him, he doesn't mind at all. My Roo has big appetites for sex and good food.) But he's hot. And his dick is long and thick. No sheath and huge Brick Red furred balls that sit above his dick unlike most animals that are below. It's typical of Kangaroos. His dick is so hard it's twitching. Nice size too. 19" and thick. He's murring now. I slip into the hot tub water. He's panting, he's too hot now, if I let him up me he'll be too hot to be gentle. "I think we need to calm you down a bit" I tell him, and I point to the edge of the tub. He sits on the edge with his huge footpaws dangling in the water. I move over and I deep throat him. "At's it, baby Kitty" he murrs as his Roo dick slides down my throat. And I work him. And he's really hot. And he's really vocal too. Cussing and moaning and grunting loudly. I hear a noise and I look through the French doors into the living room. Nigel and Horst are there, with Ignacio. He's got his huge paws on each of their shoulders. I was right. I go back to sucking Paulie. He's growling hotly. I start to speed up and he slows me down. "I know ya jaw was broken, Claude, don't let me hurt ya, please" he murrs. I smile. As hot as he is, he wants to make sure I won't hurt myself. He does care about me. I take him back down my throat and he starts to gently throat fuck me. He's cussing loudly. "I'm gonna squirt, if ya don't want me cumming in ya muzzle, pull off o me dick" he moans. I pull back a bit. "Can't hold" he hollers and I pull to where he's shooting on my tongue and I swallow him as his thick Kangaroo seed spurts out. And there's a lot of it. "Should have warned ya" he pants. He's cumming so hard he's shaking. "I cum bucketfuls" he pants. He's softly stroking my mane as he trembles, as his trembling body pushes all of his cum into my muzzle. He's murring loudly. "I'm a bit loud" he says shyly.

I pull off his dick and I hug him to me. "I loved it, I love a guy who makes a lot of noise and who gushes a big load" I say softly. He hugs me tightly. "Claude, that was, it was amazing, me Lion" he says shyly. I sit back and pull him into the water and I cuddle up against him. He puts his arm around me and he's happy. "Ya wanted me ta cool off" he says softly. "I did, and I got to taste my Roo" I tease him. "It was great" he says softly. And we sit for a bit. Quietly, just enjoying the moment. "I'd like ta stay the weekend" he says softly. "I'd love it, Paulie, I would like you to be here whenever you want to be here" I say softly. "I can take you to work when I go to my office on Monday morning, Paulie" I say softly. Paulie grins. "I think ya like me, at least a bit" he says shyly. "I do, you wouldn't be here if I didn't" I say quietly. He murrs gently. (I think he's trying to get me to tell him I love him. I do, but it's not yet time)

Edward comes out with a beer and a Diet Coke on a tray. "Thank ya, mate" Paulie says taking the beer. Edward walks off. Marcus walks out and gets in the tub. I smile at him. "You look happy Claude" he says softly. Paulie nods. "I know about ya early life, Boy" Paulie says. "Teddy cares fer ya a lot, he wanted me ta know, and he wanted ta make sure I'd not hurt ya" Paulie says. Marcus smiles. "Many care about our Claude a lot, Paulie" he says. "I won't hurt him, Sir, sexually or any other way" Paulie says earnestly. "I know, Paulie, you seem to care a lot, he showed me your note with the flowers, I think he's lucky you wanted him, you're exactly what he needs." Marcus says. I smile. I know he understands. He knows why I want to take this slow.

We all sit and chat. And Marcus is being charming. My beloved Papa Marcus can be that way. I know though he's still kind of evaluating Paulie, and he and Al will talk later, comparing notes and deciding if they do want us together. I kiss Paulie. "Gotta go pee" I say and I limp into the house. I head to the bathroom by the dining room.

Coming out I run right smack into Rory. "Who's the cute Roo?" he asks. Just like that, like nothing that happened since he last saw me matters. "Dr Paulie Christopher, and we're dating" I say quietly. "Think you're ready to date so soon" he says. "Fat lot you care" I snort. He looks surprised. Truthfully I am too, but damn it, he's acting like nothing happened to me at all. I feel like he doesn't give a damn about me at all anymore. And I can't hold back the rage I feel. (I've got to admit it, I have a worse temper now. I'm very easily brought to rage, at least with some folks.)

"Claude, I get it, you're mad at me" Rory says. "Oh, not like it'd take an Einstein to figure that out" I snort. "I don't know why though" he says. "Oh, let me see, little matter like you wouldn't come see me in the hospital, you've avoided me since I came home, and you just acted like nothing happened to me" I say angrily. He hangs his head. "I'd like to know why you didn't come see me" I say angrily. "It hurt too much, you've had such a harder life than I have, and I couldn't bear seeing you so broken up" Rory says. I look at him. "Rory, I don't know what to say here, I always thought I could depend on you, of all animals, and I needed you, and you were nowhere around, probably holed up fucking your Fox while I suffered" I snort. "Claude, what could I have done?" he asks. "I don't know, maybe let your twin brother know you still loved him, and that you were sorry he'd been abused and violated so badly" I snort. "It wouldn't have taken much, just more than the nothing you did show me." I say and I turn and gimp off. I won't look back. I should not have gotten mad, but dammit all.

I go back out to the hot tub. "Claude?" Marcus asks. He can see the rage in my eyes I know. "I ran into Rory, he asked me who the Roo was, like nothing happened since he saw me last, and I went off on him" I say quietly. "Claude, you know you shouldn't have" Marcus says. I look at him angrily. "I know we're both your sons, but just don't, Papa Marcus, I'm not the one who was wrong" I snort.

Paulie looks puzzled. "Rory's my twin brother, and he hasn't seen me since right before the gang rape, he wouldn't come to the hospital and he's avoided me since I came home, he had mated his Jeff right before I was attacked" I snort. Paulie gets out of the tub and he holds me tightly to him. I break down and I cry on his big chest. Marcus looks upset. "Claude, you know you get angry easily these days, you should have at least heard him out" Marcus says. "Has he talked to you about why he's avoiding me?" I ask. "No, in fact he never admitted to not going to see you" Marcus says. "I know you love him, he's your son too, but I'm not feeling very charitable towards my brother now" I say quietly.

Speak of the Devil. Rory comes out. "Claude, we need to talk, you and I alone" he says. "I don't know that we do" I snort. "Claude, I get that you're mad at me, but this is too important not to talk about" Rory says. I sigh. I kiss Paulie. "Papa Marcus will you look after Paulie til this is done, and can we use your study?" I ask. "Yes to both" he says. I follow Rory to our Papas' study.

I sit on a chair and wait for him to start talking. "I went to see you, and I ran into our Dad" Rory says. "I know Al and Marcus were there" I say. "No, Jim Kitman, our biological Dad, he'd heard and he went to see you, but he couldn't make himself go in to actually see you" Rory says softly. This isn't good. And it's not going to end well. I tried to calm down and listen, but this is too much. "So he heard of my attack, I guess he came to gloat" I say angrily. "No, he said he wanted to see you, make sure you were well, but he couldn't let go of his anger at you" Rory says. I snarl. "I've seen him a few times since then, but I knew you'd be mad" Rory says. "So you didn't come to see me but you went to see the male who fathered us and abandoned us both" I say archly.

"Claude, we went and had coffee, and talked, he's wanting to get to know his son and try to make it up to me for ..." he says. I roar and he stops. "So I get it, he wants his 'good' son back, and the hell with me, I know now thanks to Jonas that I was not responsible for how Mom died, I almost died myself, I was a newborn cub, how the Hell can he blame me" I roar. "Claude, he can't help how he feels" Rory says. "So go to him, you've made your choice" I say angrily. "I knew you'd react this way" he says. I'm even madder now.

"Jim Kitman has nothing to do with why I'm mad at you, Rory" I snort. "You don't get it yet, do you?" I ask angrily. He nods. "You turned your back on me when I was hurt and injured and needed you, all for a Lion who abandoned us after we were born." I yell. "When did you stop caring about me, Rory, was it when you got your Fox?" I ask angrily."When did I stop being your twin brother and become so unimportant to you,? I snort. Rory's mad too, but I can see him trying to control his temper. He's better at it than I am. And he knows I'm trying to sting him into getting mad. I always have done that with him. Rory's so even tempered, when we fight, rare as it is, I want him as mad as I am.

"Claude, be reasonable" Rory says. "You be reasonable, Rory, you abandoned me too, you want to be close to our absentee father, I don't have the right to tell you you can't, but I can tell you how badly you hurt me by abandoning me., nothing else matters right now, get it." I say angrily. "Rory, what do you want of me, of us now?" I ask. "Not to be mad at me if I try to see Dad" he says.

"And what about avoiding me and not seeing me at the hospital" I say. "I am sorry, but I knew you'd be mad" Rory says. "And that made you abandon your abused and injured brother" I snarl. "Claude, I was wrong not to come see you, is that what you wanted to hear" he snorts. "Only if you mean it, and it sure as Hell doesn't sound like you do" I say softly. "Claude, I'm sorry, you've had it so rough, and I know it has to hurt that Dad wants to get to know me and not you" Rory says. "No, no, that much I do know for sure, I don't care about him, he's never wanted us, maybe now that he's older he wants his older son, but he'll never want me, and between Al, and Marcus and Edward, I've never needed him" I say angrily. "See him if you want, maybe with time and therapy I'll forgive you for abandoning me when I was so badly injured" I say angrily. "Claude?" he asks. "We have nothing more to say to each other right now, Rory" I snap. I feel the words 'and get the Hell out of my house' on the tip of my tongue so I have to stop talking.