Bet your ass! Pt2
#23 of Shorts
A few days since that eventful night, Marty find herself in another sticky situation.
This is a work of fiction. Unless otherwise indicated, all the names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents in this story are either the product of the author's imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental. All characters are of legal and consenting age, likewise if you are reading this story you should be of legal age in your respective country.
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It had been a couple days since that eventful evening at the Devils Doorstep, the events of the evening still fresh in Marty's mind. Images of her friend's faces all staring at her with unfiltered want and desire, part of her still felt guilty for letting it happen, but that part was starting to fade. After a long talk with Leon when they eventually got back home not long after dawn broke had revealed that he was anything but upset with her, quite the opposite in fact. He'd enjoyed seeing her let go and get wild, he admitted he'd found it "Fuckin' hot" in his words, watching as his friends enjoyed his wife. Leon knew what a wild thing she was in bed and often bragged to his friends about it, unbeknownst to her. Finally they had proof of his claims, if anything they were more jealous and envious of him now than before. Marty knew she should be upset by this revelation, at first she was for sure, but the more she thought about it she felt an odd sense of pride and even smugness about it as she'd lived up to a reputation she hadn't even know she had.
Soon the discussion turned to the possibility of something similar occurring again someday, with the events still so fresh in her mind, Marty at first had said no. Marty was still unsure about the entire ordeal and did not want to garner that sort of reputation in the biker community as a whole. But in the days following the incident, she noticed the members of their group seemed to be treating her with more respect and even a little awe now than they had before, instead of the smug mockery she'd been expecting from them. Even Ash started speaking more, a curious side effect of their time together perhaps.
Marty needed some alone time to think and clear her head, so with her new bike finally in her possession she headed out on the roads. Having something else between her thighs she was in complete control of for a change seemed like a good idea. The bike handled like a dream, she had to give it to Morty; the ferret did excellent work. Riding her new Strontium Yellow Triumph almost made up for him getting her gangbanged all evening and leaving her with aches in new and interesting places.
Turning a corner and seeing a long straight before her, instinct kicked in as she put the figurative pedal to the metal and pushed her bike faster and faster. She watched the speedometer as it steadily rose, easily surpassing the one hundred mark, then one twenty and kept on climbing. She looked down again to see the needle fluttering just shy of one hundred and fifty, but that wasn't the only thing she saw. In her mirrors were flashing red and blues, Marty cursed under her breath as she let off the gas and slowed down before pulling over onto the shoulder of the road.
"Do you have any idea how fast you were going?" A familiar voice asked as it approached her from behind while she undid her chinstrap and slipped out of her helmet. Her fiery orange spiky hair catching the light. The multiple studs along her ears glinting in the light as she turned a little in her seat to try peer back at the officer standing behind her.
"Sorry, I'm all out of fucks to give. I heard a store in town was having a sale, was trying to get there before they sold out." Marty replied on instinct, doing her best to hold back a soft growl.
"Well well, what do we have here? If it isn't Marty Marty, life of the party. Long time no see, mutt" A tall broad chested draft horse said with a smarmy smirk at her. The large equine moved closer, peering down at her over the rim of his glasses with an unsettling predatory sort of grin.
"Shit...Bryce?" Marty had a sinking feeling, having history with this douchebag already, not a good history either. Bryce had been a typical football jock back in High school and he'd always been an asshole. He'd been handsome back then, still was now truth be told, but he had a really shitty narcissistic and domineering personality. Back then she hadn't been so wise to the world and had unfortunately fallen for his charming smile, they'd had a brief fling until he tried to force himself on her one night but she'd managed to get away from him and run home. The next day he was acting like she'd lead him on and calling her a slut in front of the school, to which she promptly kneed him square in the balls, making him the laughing stock of the school as he'd collapsed into a whining and wheezing pile on the ground. She'd done her best to avoid him and his jock friends from then on, at least until she graduated and never saw him again, until today it seemed.
"Marty, I warned you last time about speeding. You know damn well your license has been suspended and you still have unpaid tickets!" Another familiar though more friendly voice said from her other side like a parent reprimanding their kid. Marty turned to see the scowling face of an old bloodhound she'd known most of her life.
Putting on her sweetest and most innocent smile, Marty turned to the old dog "Hey Mike, you know me and speed, it's in my blood..." she tried to say with her sweetest smile to butter him up. The old dog however looked over at Bryce, giving a sigh and shaking his head.
"Sorry Marty, Bryce here is my rookie in training. I can't let you off this time, we're going to have to take you in. Sorry to say, we're going to have to impound your bike as well, but with your fines and license situation, she's probably going to get the compacter. Pity too, she's a beaut!" Marty could see the hint of recognition in the bloodhound's eyes, he'd known one other like it, his best friend used to ride one before meeting an untimely end.
"What!? You can't do that! Isn't there something you can do? C'mon Mike, help me out here, please..." Marty suddenly burst out, placing her hands on the fuel tank protectively as if protecting her child. Her eyes pleading with the old bloodhound.
"I'm sorry Marty, my hands are tied. I have to follow the book on this one, if it was just me I'd help you out. But Bryce here is in training and it's ultimately up to him to make a judgment call here" Mike gently explained, looking almost as disheartened as Marty at the prospect of her bike being compacted.Marty turned to face Bryce, her blood running cold at the smirk he was giving her. Marty thinking for sure he was going to follow through with this just to spite her, but his words took her by surprise.
"Well Marty, we all know each other here, we're friends right? As friends I'm sure we can come up with some sort of deal, you know if we scratch your back you scratch ours right?" Bryce started, Marty having a sinking feeling of where he was going with this. "How about you entertain Mike and I for a little, I mean it has been rather quiet out here so we could use something to break the monotony. In return we'll let you off with a warning, how does that sound Mike?" the horse asked with a smug grin over at the surprised looking bloodhound.
Marty was certain Mike would decline the offer, having known her since she was a kid, what Bryce was suggesting would be rather awkward or even reprehensible to him surely. He was the closest thing to family she had left these days, he was practically her uncle. When she met his gaze however, she could see the gears turning in his head, his eyes roaming her over slowly in her form fitting riding leathers. Suddenly feeling very self-conscious as the old dog drank in her curves, the flare of her shapely hips and to her firm bust. Her cleavage on display in her tight leather jacket as usual with her zipper tugged almost scandalously down her front.
"I mean, it would mean no compactor and I'd prefer not having to do that..." Mike tried to rationalize with Marty, but she knew the real reason. Even just the thought of getting his hands on her was making the front of his trousers tent.
Marty turned back to Bryce with an icy glare and through clenched jaws gave an angry "fine" as acceptance of his offer. Mike informed her of an old barn he knew of where they could "scratch each other's backs" that wasn't too far away, following her in their patrol car as she headed down the dirt road as directed to a large faded red barn set back behind some trees and barely visible from the main road. With her bike and the patrol car parked out of view behind the barn, Marty was led inside and upstairs to the loft where there was a chair, table and well-worn mattress. Downstairs just smelled of dry hay and mud, but upstairs it smelled of alcohol and something Marty preferred not to think about as it brought back unwanted memories of the other night. Bryce leaned against one of the posts as he watched and waited for his turn, Mike meanwhile sat down in the old worn out seat with Marty standing before him, again his gaze roamed her form now he was able to better see her. Her form fitting leathers doing little to hide her almost hourglass figure and full bust, her leather pants cupping her shapely round behind.
Marty felt like a stripper with their eyes on her while she began to strip, kicking off her boots before removing her leather jacket and pants. Both males giving an appreciative grumble as more of her black and tan form was slowly exposed, soon standing in just her panties and a low cut sleeveless tee.
"Damn Marty, for such a scrawny kid growing up, you've filled out nicely" Mike commented as she lifted her top up over her head to expose her breasts with little dime sized pink nipples. The bloodhound licked his lips as she slowly pushed her underwear down along her thighs to reveal her narrow vee to him, capped with a little triangular patch of thicker orange pubic fur, shuddering as he reached out to brush his fingertips between her thighs and tracing his fingertips back over her folds.
Mike leaned back in his seat as he undid and removed his belt, opening his button and fly before shoving his pants down about his ankles to reveal a decently thick sheath with a dark red tapered tip beginning to emerge. Marty gave him one last pleading look to appeal to his senses, but it was clear Mike was no longer thinking with the right head. Sighing in resignation at her situation, Marty rested her hands on the thighs she used to sit upon and cuddle with whenever they watched scary movies at his. Now she had her face buried between them as she kissed and licked at his swelling cock, feeling more and more of him slip free and into her maw as he gently pushed her head down into his lap. With a soft hand stroking through her hair and rubbing behind her ears, Marty let the old dog guide her muzzle along his thick shaft. While he was quite wide, wider than she could grip her fingers around and have her fingertips touch, he thankfully wasn't that long at only a little over six inches. Still she would have to work at sucking the old dog though, finding he liked when she pulled back to suck on his tip and tease it with her tongue while she squeezed his balls, feeling him throb in her mouth and giving a little spurt of salty precum onto her tongue. Soon Mike was panting, his claws digging into her scalp as his rump raised from his seat while he bucked into her maw. It wasn't much longer before she felt the familiar warm splash of seed hit her tongue, despite his big balls the old dog luckily didn't produce much cum. Marty had definitely swallowed more of the stuff in the last few days than she had the past few years combined so she was thankful for this small mercy. With her tongue giving him one last swirl to clean the remnants of his climax, Marty pulled her lips from his tip with a soft wet suckle and sat back on her knees before him.
Mike huffed and panted, wiping the back of a hand across his forehead as he grinned down at her. "Got quite the hot little mouth on you, dontcha? My turn, always wondered what that little peach of yours tasted like..." he said with a lecherous glint in his eyes. Marty was guided over to the well-used and worn mattress, laid back with Mike moving to kneel between her thighs as he stared hungrily down at her laid bare cunt. With her legs over his shoulders, the old mutt got a good look at her up close and personal, neat and tight little folds just barely pouting. Marty blushed as the man old enough to be her father wasted no time before he began kissing and licking along her vulva, his whiskers tickled her inner thighs and bringing back unbidden memories of him tickling her when she was just a kid. She'd never had a sexual thought about him in her life, but apparently that was not mutual and here he now was with his tongue buried in her cunt as he ate her out with surprising fervor. Marty growled as she felt that familiar tingle starting, her tummy clenching in waves as she reached out to grip Mike's hair, but he wasn't deterred. If anything he just attacked her cunt harder, kissing and sucking on her clit before shoving his obscenely long tongue back inside her and making her utter out a soft "Christ, Mike!" every so often. Images of all Mike's past girlfriends started to make sense, she recalled times when her father commented on how Mike's partners were so far out of his league, he must have something going for him. Marty was finding out first hand why all of Mike's former partners were always smiling as his long tongue touched and teased spots inside her even she didn't know about. Her abdominal muscles flexing as she squirmed and writhed under the oral assault, Mikes hands caressing over the curve of her hips and over her taut belly, feeling the faint definition of muscle beneath fur and even on up to caress the underside of her heaving breasts while the Doberman whined and panted heavily.
Marty swore she saw stars as her climax hit like a ton of bricks, her head rolling back in a loud groan while her belly and thighs strained against the bloodhounds muzzle. Only Mike's eyes were visible between her thighs and over her mound, but Marty could tell he was grinning as he lapped up every last trace of her climax from her. Still grinning as he eventually withdrew his tongue from her, licking his chops as if having just enjoyed a feast before proclaiming "Better than I imagined."
As Marty lay panting and staring up at the light outside filtering through holes in the ceiling, she idly wondered what Leon would say right now if he saw or knew what she was doing. A slight smile tugged at her lips as she knew he'd enjoy watching her with other men again probably. Raising her head from the mattress she saw Mike back in his chair, grinning at her as he patted his lap. Marty saw the old dog was hard again after having gotten to eat her out, with a tired sigh she rolled over before crawling over on shaky legs to the bloodhound. Climbing up into his lap she would guide his stiffness into herself with a soft groan, fucker was thick and stretched her a good bit. With a determined clench to her jaw she would settle down in his lap eventually with a low groan, hips grinding and gyrating down on his cock while his hands reached up to first cup under her breasts to give a little heft, feeling their weight in his palms before he rotated his wrists to grope over her bare breasts. He'd commented earlier on how well she'd filled out and now he was exploring her curves intently. His soft thumbs brushed and rubbed at her nipples affectionately, gently pinching and rolling them as she started riding him slowly.
Under any other circumstance she would actually be enjoying this, aside from the awkwardness of Mike having been a prominent figure all throughout her childhood and now here he was balls deep in her, he was a surprisingly gentle and attentive lover. It didn't hurt that he had a nice girthy dick for her to ride on as well, stretching her out just enough to add a hint of pain to a delightful fullness as she lifted and fell back down onto it in constant slow wavelike motions. Leaning in to press her cheek against the bloodhounds, Marty nuzzled at him affectionately as he started to buck up into her, feeling his own release starting to near. Shifting about in his lap, Marty came to rest her forehead against Mikes, staring into his eyes with a soft pant as he caressed her breasts. Her hips rolling and gyrating against his lap while he lightly bucked up into her. The moment felt oddly tender despite everything and soon Marty felt her own release come upon her, eyes closing as she whined softly, barely loud enough for even Mike to hear. But he would feel her climax rather intimately as the Doberman ground harder on his cock, gripping tighter down on that thick red rocket and soon milking his own release from him. Mike grit his teeth, arms wrapping about her shoulders as he hugged Marty tight to his chest while he bucked erratically up into her as he pumped her full of his cum. Marty remained resting against his chest as they caught their breath, enjoying the closeness for a little while longer, until their almost happy moment was interrupted by an annoyed snort from the watching equine behind them.
"My turn, bitch. Get my cock out and start sucking" Bryce practically snarled at Marty. Mike gave her an apologetic look and a soft caress along her flank, but they both knew she was too far along this path to turn back now. With a sigh of resignation and expelling her breath through her nose, Marty forced herself to raise up out of Mike's lap and reluctantly off his cock in order to pad over to face Bryce.
"Finally got me between a rock and a hard place, I can't escape your dick this time, just how you've always wanted..." Marty growled low at Bryce as he stood before her expectantly, glaring at him with unmuted hatred.
"Always such the smart mouth, bet it's good for more than just talking shit" The horse mocked as he gripped Marty by an ear painfully and pulled her snout down against his crotch, forcing her to drop to her knees before him as he began grinding his bulge against her face "Get to sucking..."
Marty refused to wince or flinch as her ear was painfully gripped and used to tug her against Bryce's crotch, she wouldn't give him that satisfaction. Having no choice but to suck his dick was already more than she ever wished to give this asshole. With no passion lost she roughly undid his zipper to reach within and tug his boxers down to reveal his thick sheath. It took everything she had not to dig her claws into the arrogant pricks balls, every fiber of her being screaming for her to do so. But she didn't, instead her fingers gripped his thick shaft within the soft leathery pouch and began to stroke, squeezing at the base to get him to drop for her as she'd seen in some porn videos she and Leo had watched together. Thankfully the trick worked and soon she had a fair bit of flaccid equine cock exposed and drooping over a pair of heavy dark balls. She leaned in to give his shaft a lick and caught a whiff of his scent, he smelled good, goddamit why did he have to smell so good? Marty tried to keep a passive look as she began drawing her tongue along his shaft, licking along one side, then the other before tracing back down along the thick vein along the underside to kiss at his heavy balls. Bryce smirking as he sensed she was going to comply, even helping with undoing his belt and trousers to let them fall and provide the sufficiently heeled bitch full access to his crotch. He gripped the base of his by now stiff and throbbing erection, lightly slapping Marty's face with it before lifting it out the way and pressing her face into his sack. As hard as she tried, Marty couldn't stop her docked tail from giving just one meager wag at his pleasing scent as it overwhelmed her, unfortunately Bryce caught that too.
"Still the same slut from High School, enjoying a thick dick and heavy balls in your face" mocked the horse as Marty diligently lapped and kissed across his balls. Finally he had enough attention to his sufficiently spit shined orbs, gripping her short red hair and roughly yanking her head back, making the Doberman yelp, only to cut the sound off by shoving his cock into her mouth and making her gag. "Hnnf, that's it, swallow down that dick Marty" the horse taunted as he felt her trying to swallow and get some air, her hands pushing against his hips to try dislodge him from her throat, but he held fast.
"Boy, you better let off now or you're gonna kill her" Mike finally chimed in as he saw how Marty was starting to panic and fight against Bryce's grip.
"Just...a little....longerrrr....there we go..." Bryce snorted as his heavy balls raised up against his body, twitching and jumping with every spurt of seed forced down the Dobermans throat. Finally letting her pull off his cock, only to catch the last couple spurts of his seed across her face.
"Asshole!" Marty coughed and spluttered, collapsing to the floor as she hacked up some of his mess and a fair bit of her own drool. Bryce's menacing glare went unnoticed however by both Marty and Mike as he knelt down beside her, laying a gentle hand on her shoulder as he made sure she was alright.
"Marty...." Mike began to say.
"I'm okay, Mike. It takes a real man to hurt me..." She almost spat out before turning to glare at Bryce whose response was an annoyed snort and to reach down and grip her by an arm, yanking her to her feet before pushing her back onto the table. Before Marty could try avoid it or at least prepare herself, Bryce had her legs up against his chest and over his shoulders, her vulnerable cunt exposed and level with his crotch, her eyes going wide with a pained snarl as he roughly bucked into her, stretching her cunt in one firm thrust. Try as she might not to show it, that thrust did hurt and he damn well knew it. The bastard didn't even let her adjust, his fingers digging painfully into her thighs to hold her in place as he withdrew a few inches from her, only to buck roughly back into her again. Where she'd managed to not yelp the first time, the second time she wasn't so lucky.
A part of Marty preferred it this way however, she didn't want any mixed feelings about Bryce and she definitely didn't want to give him the satisfaction of him knowing he'd actually brought her pleasure. But it wasn't to be, almost as if he had some sort of sick and twisted sixth sense, his thrusts would slow and become more evenly paced. Instead of trying to batter her aching cunt with his thick ebony shaft like a battering ram, he would instead stroke in and out of the tight Doberman cunt in a practiced and measured pace. Marty grit her teeth as she glared up at him when one of his hands reached down to grope at her breast, the other reaching down between her thighs to trap her clit between two fingers to gently pinch and roll in time to his thrusts. She'd hoped he was an inept lover, she'd feel better if he gave her only pain, but this was somehow worse as he got her hips to rock up against his touch of their own accord. Marty closed her eyes and turned her head aside, trying to picture Leon's face and imaging it was her husband doing this to her, giving her this pleasure. But try as hard as she might, she could hear and smell Bryce looming over her as he bucked hard enough into her that her smaller form bounced beneath him, her cunt betraying her as it squeezed down greedily on his cock.
It partially worked, though not quite how she hoped it would. A slow gradual upwelling inside her grew and grew until it burst free with a low long groan as she came around Bryce's cock. She didn't have to look up at him to see the no doubt smug grin as he felt her clenching and squeezing down on his shaft, her muscles tensing as she writhed beneath him. Bryce would keep her climax going though, as if to drive the point home that he could make her cum despite her best efforts, slowly fucking her and stirring her sensitive insides until she panted and whined, begging him to stop.
In an uncharacteristic move, Bryce did as asked and slowly withdrew his length from Marty. Finally her eyes opened and she looked up at the horse whom stood smirking down at her, noticing the muscles in his shoulder flexing and tensing, following his arm down to his hand wrapped around his still stiff cock as a heavy drop of precum formed at its tip, gravity claiming it when it fell to the floor below with a soft note of finality. Marty felt renewed dread as Bryce wasn't done with her yet it seemed, as if to confirm her fears he released his shaft to instead grip her by her waist, tugging her rump over the edge of the table before flipping and rolling the Doberman over so she would be standing on her feet with her hips against the edge of the table rather uncomfortably.
"Nice tramp stamp" Bryce commented as he saw the tattoo at the small of her back, a pair of angle wings either side of a halo with horns, the symbol of her and Leon's club. His mocking tone brought forth yet another growl from the bent over Doberman. Suddenly his breath caressed her ear, his weight pressing down against her back as he pinned her in place against the table. Bryce's lips close to her ear as he whispered so only she could hear, "This is for kneeing me in the balls back in High School, bitch..."
Marty yelped as Bryce had positioned himself under her docked tail, his slick tip wedged against her unprepared tail hole. Not that he cared, he wanted her to feel it as his blunt tip forced her open and he crammed himself past her protesting opening all the way to the hilt. He'd finally hurt her, Marty yelping and squirming between his hips and the table, pinned in place and unable to escape as he ground roughly against her ass and was quite obviously enjoying the tight clenches of her body trying to reject him. Once he heard her sniff and saw her close her eyes, he knew he'd won. Standing up straight behind her to grip her wrists and pin them up against her back roughly, as if restraining a suspect, only here his hips were pressed flush to her shapely behind now spread around his girth with her tail twitching painfully above it.
"Jesus boy, did you just...Marty?" Mike asked with concern as he watched in abject horror at the scene unfolding before him. As if to answer the question, Marty turned her face away from Mike as Bryce gave the old dog a victorious grin. Mike's hackles raised as Bryce began to withdraw a couple of inches and bucked back into the limp Dobermans behind, his hips slapping against her shapely behind again and again. "Boy, if you hurt her, there's going to be hell to pay. Not just from me, but you're going to start a war between the law and the bikers around here..." Mike growled at Bryce.
The draft horse just snorted, giving another rough buck into Marty as he spoke. "You're a big girl, right Marty? You can handle a dick up your ass, pretty sure it's not the first time..." came his mocking words, when she didn't reply or even so much as growl, Bryce turned to wink at Mike while saying "See, she loves a nice fat dick under her tail."
Some small part of Marty was even more thankful for the other night with her friends so this wasn't the first time she'd taken something that big under her tail, but she wasn't about to tell Bryce that. With tears forming at the corners of her eyes, Marty grit her teeth and bore the rough fucking, hating every pleasured grunt and snort of Bryce above her. Hated every tap of his heavy balls against her damp slit when he hilted her, the way he filled her so completely. She was sure he could feel her hatred of this moment and fed off of it, got off on it too thankfully. His breathing becoming labored and faster, so too did his thrusts into her. Her shoulders, arms and wrists ached from being twisted and pinned so high up between her shoulders, even more so as Bryce used his grip for leverage to drive harder into her. Finally with a loud whinny the bastard bucked one last hard time against her backside, his hips grinding against the curve of her rear before his balls tucked up against his body once more, twitching and bouncing with every thick jet of hot scalding seed he fired off under her tail. His climax seemed to last an eternity, Marty feeling uncomfortably full with both his cock and now such an obscene amount of cum inside her, but when he did finally withdraw, it forced an uncomfortable grunt from her as the now empty feeling felt alien from having been so stuffed full for so long. She could feel the warmth of his seed spill from her aching pucker, running down the cleft of her behind and touching her folds below before dripping to the floor between her feet.
"That was great, we should do it again sometime. If you ever need to pay a ticket, you're welcome to a repeat" Bryce mocked as he got dressed again, but not before giving Marty's bare and aching behind a harsh spank.
Marty slowly pushed herself up off the table, her legs trembling a little as she tried to stand. With a glare that would make any sane man quake in his boots, she turned to face Bryce. Padding over to stand before him, feeling his cum starting to seep from under her tail a little more down the cleft of her buttocks and inner thighs, further marking her with his disgusting scent.
"Did you enjoy fucking me in the ass? " Marty growled as she stood glaring up at Bryce.
"You bet your ass..." Bryce began to say, but was cut short as Marty gripped him by the shoulders to tug him forwards and into the knee she swung up hard to catch him square in the balls. The stallion whinnied in pain, doubling over and collapsing to the ground, sounding like he was going to throw up while muttering curses and threats at the sneering Doberman bitch.
"Can't say you weren't asking for that, kid. Suck it up and walk it off. Marty, pleasure doing business with you. Try keep it under a hundred at least from now on, yeah?" The Sheriff said with a grin at her, stooping down to collect his own clothing and getting dressed.
"If you ever try this shit again, there'll be hell to pay. This was the only time you will ever get to lay your hands on me, Bryce. Next time, you'll get gelded by my bare hands" Marty snarled down at the wheezing horse, stamping her foot to his shoulder to force him onto his back and look up at her. His arrogance vanishing as he meekly nodded up at Marty. Her anger starting to fade a little at seeing the fear and understanding in her tormentor's eyes.
"Mike, you should come around some time so we can catch up, it's been too long" Marty turned to say to the old dog with a fond smile. The wide eyed look Mike gave her nearly making her laugh, but he just winked at her and nodded in agreement before stooping down to help the still wheezing horse to his feet.
"Sure thing Marty, it was great seeing you again. Send my regards to Leon, you go on now. I'll clean 'this' up" Mike said with a note of finality as he stared down at Bryce. "Boy, I told you not to hurt her..."