Different Ch.7
Imported from SF2 with no description.
Melias stared at his reflection in his phone screen and took a deep breath. This was it. Time to tell Ro the truth. The truth about his body. The truth about his love.
He unlocked his phone. Three new notifications, all in the messages app.
[16:57:50] Ro: hey melias. i know you probably never want to talk to me again
[16:58:03] Ro: probably already blocked me
[16:59:14] Ro: i just wanted you to know that i'm so sorry. i completely freaked out. i wish i were a better person but i'm not and you shouldn't have to put up with me. sorry for fucking your life up and wasting all your time
Melias' eyes shot to the clock, and his heart dropped into his stomach. It was nearly six. These messages were sent almost an hour ago. Was Ro okay? Melias' confidence and motivation relapsed into anxiety as he typed a reply, but half-way through, he stopped. This was too important to do over text. He needed to hear Ro's voice, and he needed Ro to hear his. He called him, and waited. Five rings. No response. He'd let it ring a hundred times. A thousand times. A million times. But with each ring, his fears grew. Why wasn't Ro answering? What if he was attacked on the way home? Or worse—what if he hurt himself? Melias shot to his feet. He needed to go to Ro's dorm. He needed to make sure that everything was okay. He would not be the cause of—
And then the ringing stopped. No voice came. No 'hello,' no 'hey,' no acknowledgement at all. But he did hear something—the faint hiss of background noise. And that's all he needed to hear.
“Ro… I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. Are you okay?"
Still nothing, but he swore he heard a sniff.
“I'm sorry for biting you, and I'm sorry for not apologizing." He circled around his room over and over as he strained to find the words. “I had a bad reaction to… something, and I… I panicked."
Great. Still nothing from Ro. Was he even there?
Anxiety gave way to outright fear. “I'm… I'm sorry. Please, Ro… I want to see you again…"
No response. Even the background noise was gone. Melias looked at his phone, and nearly swallowed his throat when he saw that the call had ended. But wait—he had a new message. He swiped his finger across the screen so hard that he nearly launched it out of his hand.
[18:00:37] Ro: text instead
Thank god. Thank fucking god. But three dots bounced beneath the message. Melias waited breathlessly for whatever came next.
[18:00:51] Ro: i don't want you to hear me right now
[18:00:58] Melias: Why not?
[18:01:11] Ro: my voice is gone
Melias finally breathed. Just talking to Ro soothed his fraying nerves.
[18:01:36] Melias: Are you okay?
It was a rhetorical question.
[18:02:12] Ro: why don't you hate me
Because I love you.
[18:03:34] Melias: Because I don't.
[18:03:42] Ro: lol
[18:03:49] Ro: that's such a you response
[18:03:58] Melias: Is that bad?
[18:04:06] Ro: no
[18:04:13] Ro: it made me smile
[18:04:21] Ro: then it made me sad
[18:04:26] Melias: Sorry.
[18:04:36] Ro: i'm going to miss hanging out with you
Melias flashed hot. Ro wasn't going to do something dumb, was he?
[18:04:47] Melias: What do you mean?
[18:04:54] Ro: i should just stay away
[18:05:01] Ro: for your own good
No! He had lived his whole life without Ro, but now he couldn't imagine ever being without him. Just the thought made his eyes water again. He typed and erased and typed and erased, but everything seemed wrong. Melias rubbed his throbbing forehead. A hundred more responses formed in his mind, and none of them seemed right. One wrong word, one stupid statement, and he'd never see Ro again.
Melias reread Ro's message. For your own good… for your own good… that was it. Ro didn't want to hurt him, but that was one thing that would hurt the most.
[18:06:13] Melias: Please don't say that.
[18:06:24] Melias: I've been alone and miserable my entire life.
[18:06:41] Melias: But the time we spent together was the happiest I've ever been.
[18:06:49] Melias: I don't want to be alone again.
[18:06:55] Ro: you
Melias stared at the dots bouncing below that single word. Never before had a single message had so much potential to destroy everything. Time stretched on. The animation looped over and over and over, like a torture device designed to drive the victim mad.
[18:08:09] Ro: you're one of the best things that's ever happened to me. you treat me like a person and not some dangerous freak that needs to be put down
Melias exhaled and his head stopped spinning. Ro still liked him. Yet the dots continued to bounce. Was a 'but' coming?
[18:08:22] Ro: you protected me when i was attacked
[18:08:37] Ro: you took care of me when i was hurt
[18:08:54] Ro: and i repaid that by snapping at you and treating you like shit and making you mad
[18:09:03] Ro: so why don't you hate me?
[18:09:15] Melias: I wasn't mad. I was scared.
[18:09:25] Ro: of what
Was it finally time? Melias typed a response, then deleted it. No, that was why he called in the first place. It didn't seem right to tell Ro his secret over text. He wanted to be with him when he did it. He wanted to show Ro what he meant, no matter how scary it was.
[18:10:50] Melias: You… said something that I'm very sensitive about.
[18:10:56] Ro: oh
[18:11:02] Ro: sorry
[18:11:13] Ro: should have kept my mouth shut
[18:11:24] Melias: No, but I clearly should have.
[18:11:31] Ro: .
[18:11:39] Ro: okay that made me giggle
[18:11:44] Melias: :>
The levity eased the crow's racing heart—but just a little. He needed to see Ro again. He needed to see for himself that he was okay. He needed to hold him close. He needed to tell him everything.
[18:12:09] Melias: Can I come over?
[18:12:17] Melias: I want to apologize in person.
[18:12:22] Ro: ugh
[18:12:25] Ro: i
[18:12:37] Ro: i'm gonna be honest with you.
God, he hated messages like that. Anything could be coming. He stared once again at the accursed bouncing dots, fearing whatever they portended.
[18:13:00] Ro: i've been crying my eyes out the last hour. my voice is gone. i look like shit
[18:13:14] Ro: i don't want you to see me like this
Melias fell backwards onto his bed. So he did hurt Ro, even after he promised not to. Yet something felt strange. The urge to beat himself up, usually so automatic and subconscious, was absent. Where had it gone? He heard that strange voice—his voice?—again.
“You can do it, Melias. I believe in you."
That's right. He could do it. He had to do it! All he needed was to show Ro that he cared.
[18:13:28] Melias: I was crying, too.
[18:13:34] Ro: what?? no
[18:13:41] Ro: you didn't do anything wtong
[18:13:44] Ro: wrong
[18:13:50] Melias: Ro, it's okay. I'm fine now.
[18:13:51] Ro: please don't feel bad
[18:14:01] Melias: Just talking to you has made me feel so much better.
[18:14:06] Ro: i
[18:14:17] Ro: i'm sorry i made you cry
[18:14:37] Melias: I made a mistake. Maybe we both did. But all I really want is to see you happy again. You're my favourite person in the world.
The phone trembled in his hand as he re-read his last message. Did he come on too strong?
[18:15:16] Ro: Melias…
[18:15:26] Ro: that's very sweet of you
[18:15:39] Ro: i just feel like such a piece of shit
[18:15:51] Ro: i don't deserve your friendship
Melias' took a sharp breath. He didn't care if he was coming on strong. He would do anything—say anything—to keep Ro in his life.
[18:16:09] Melias: That's not true. I want to see you. Can I come over?
[18:16:13] Melias: Please.
[18:16:16] Ro: mmm
[18:16:21] Ro: sorry, i just
[18:16:27] Ro: i don't want to hurt you again
[18:16:37] Melias: Losing you would hurt me more than anything.
And then he did it. He typed “I love you." His finger shook above the send button. He'd do it if he had to, but he still feared the consequences. Maybe he could wait to see what Ro had to say…
[18:16:52] Ro: …
[18:17:00] Ro: you don't have class on tuesday morning right
[18:16:49] Melias: Not until 1.
[18:16:54] Ro: well
[18:16:58] Ro: i guess
[18:17:07] Ro: we can hang out tomorrow morning
Melias' muscles relaxed all at once. He would see Ro again. He had to wait longer than he wanted, but he was willing to do it. Willing to do whatever his best friend wanted.
[18:17:23] Melias: Okay. Thank you. I'm sorry again for biting you.
[18:17:34] Ro: i'm sorry for freaking out like i did
[18:17:49] Ro: even though i deserve it, i'm glad you don't hate me lol
[18:17:59] Melias: I'm glad you don't hate me, either.
[18:18:08] Ro: i could never hate you
[18:18:16] Ro: never never never
[18:18:24] Ro: not in a millon years
[18:18:29] Ro: milion
[18:18:34] Ro: fuck whatever
[18:18:46] Ro: okay… i guess i'm going to go get cleaned up.
[18:18:53] Ro: talk to you soon
[18:19:03] Melias: Okay. Take care.
Melias let his arm fall to his side, and he stared at the ceiling. A kaleidoscope of emotions painted his mind, but the most vivid was relief. Deep, spiritual relief. For once, the world showed mercy. The sky would not fall on him—not yet. As he lay on his bed, his eyes quickly grew leaden. Without the adrenaline of panic and anxiety, he had no energy left. He opened his eyes long enough to send Ro a message, then crawled under the blankets. Almost immediately, warmth enveloped him, and the world faded away.
—
Melias opened his eyes and saw nothing but a blurry red glow at the corner of his eye. He heard nothing but a soft rumbling—the gentle snoring of an athletic orange tabby. He turned his head and blinked, and the red glow slowly formed into the display of his alarm clock. Barely past three in the morning. Ro would surely be asleep. He slid his phone off the bedside table and unlocked it, squinting as the powerful display blasted his eyes with much more light than they were expecting.
[18:33:49] Melias: Sleep night
He cringed. That's what he wrote?
[18:41:30] Ro: ?
[18:41:42] Ro: did you fall asleep?
[18:49:33] Ro: guess so… not a bad idea honestly
[18:49:54] Ro: sleep well, Melias. i'll see you tomorrow
[20:45:18] Ro: hey Melias, when you wake up, can you look around your room for my wallet? i can't find it anywhere but i know i had it there
[20:45:39] Ro: m hope i didn't lose it somewhere else ugh
Melias slid out of bed and tiptoed around his room, pointing his phone screen around like a flashlight. It didn't take him long to find a black wallet on the edge of his desk. He opened it and slid a card out. Ro's student card. That tiny, expressionless mugshot filled Melias with such joy. Ro was so beautiful. He glared at his clock, irritated that it showed him such an early, Ro-less hour. Why must he wait so long to see him again?
[03:11:54] Melias: Yes, it's here. I'll bring it this morning.
He slid the card back into the wallet and set it back on the desk, pulled out his laptop, and spent the next few hours quietly wasting time. Hours passed, and as he watched some mind-numbing video reviewing some computer hardware he couldn't afford, his phone vibrated.
[05:53:19] Ro: oh thank god
Merely seeing Ro's name immediately made Melias' heart throb.
[05:53:35] Ro: i thought i dropped it when i ran back or something
[05:54:02] Melias: Good morning. Did you sleep well?
[05:54:07] Ro: good morning
[05:54:17] Ro: uh, not really, tbh. but i also fell asleep pretty early
[05:54:26] Ro: not as early as you though lol
[05:54:37] Ro: kinda stuck inside until i get my card back
[05:55:20] Ro: oh since you have it, you can use it to get into my dorm so i don't have to go out there and unlock it for you
[05:55:25] Melias: Hang on.
[05:55:32] Ro: that's not actually allowed but i don't really care…
[05:55:36] Melias: How did you get back in if you didn't have your card?
[05:55:53] Ro: the door was open because people were going in and out
[05:56:05] Ro: happens all the time… didn't think anything of it
[05:56:18] Ro: didn't even notice it was gone until i messaged you last night
[05:56:25] Melias: Oh.
Melias looked again at the time. The sun wasn't even up, but he didn't care. He wanted—needed—to see Ro.
[05:58:13] Melias: I need to shower, but I can come over after.
[05:58:20] Ro: oh
[05:58:29] Ro: i didn't expect you so soon
[05:58:41] Ro: i'll take a shower too then
Oh no. Don't imagine him naked, don't imagine him naked, don't ima—too late. He closed his eyes, and visions of Ro, water running down his naked body, filled his mind. The soaked human smiled at him and extended his hand.
“Want to join me?"
Melias' groin tingled and his shoulders tensed. He swung around to reach for a toy, but froze when he saw the sleeping cat dangling half-way off his bed. Melias shook his head. His growing arousal was not strong enough to overcome his fear of the cat waking up while he had a dildo base-deep in his cloaca. And besides, maybe he needed to save himself for… no. No, no, don't think like that. He sent an affirmation to Ro, then went to shower—alone. When he was done and dry, he went back to the dorm, grabbed a bag of seeds for breakfast, then prepared to head out.
[06:26:18] Melias: I'm on my way. Which room was yours again?
[06:26:50] Ro: 128
Melias stuffed his phone into his pocket, grabbed Ro's wallet, and set off. As he had one foot out the door, he took another look at the sleeping tabby. Usually, Melias would leave without a second thought, but he felt he owed Xaza some courtesy for being there for him yesterday. He doubled back into the room, and scribbled a little note.
Xaza,
Thank you again for your help yesterday. I am doing better now. I believe Ro and I have resolved our conflict, and I am going to his room this morning to speak with him in person.
Melias
He placed the note on Xaza's table, then left the room, taking the shortest path he knew to Ro's dorm. Excitement bubbled inside of him, but so too did fear. He was nervous for all the normal reasons, but there was a strange, extra tension behind the thought of being next to Ro again.
As he crossed the campus, the early morning chill biting his beak, yesterday had fully sunk in. He and Ro… almost had sex. Not a fantasy, not a weird misunderstanding. They were both into it, and if Melias hadn't fucked up, he might well have lost his virginity. And they were going to be together again. Alone again. Yesterday's possibilities could become today's realities. His steps slowed as he stared into the sky, dark blue giving way to the orange of the early sunrise. The dawn of a new day… perhaps a new life. An opportunity to screw up and throw it all away, or to finally feel alive. To feel like he had a place in the world.
No pressure.
His heart thumped as he climbed the steps to Ro's building. He fumbled with the wallet, pulled out the student card, and swiped it on the card reader. The lock clicked, and the door slowly opened. He followed the signs on the walls, moving quickly through the lobby until he arrived at his destination. Room 128. This was it. He took a deep breath and knocked softly on the door. After a few long moments, the door creaked open. He expected to see Ro, but instead, got a clear view into the human's room.
“Come in."
The voice was weak, shaky, and barely audible, even in the quiet hallway. But it was definitely Ro. Melias peeked around the open door, and the instant he laid eyes upon the downcast human, his own anxieties evaporated. Every part of his body screamed for him to storm around the corner and pull the human into a tight hug. The only thing stopping him was his chest injury.
“Melias," Ro whispered. “I'm sorry. None of this—"
His urges won out. Melias stepped around the door and wrapped his arms around Ro, though he resisted—barely—his desire to squeeze tight. “It's okay."
“But I hurt you."
“And I hurt you. I'm sorry."
Ro's soft, gentle hands came to rest on his shoulder blades, then pulled him close. God, what heaven. What bliss. He wanted nothing else. Ever.
Ro sniffed. “I… uh… god." Every word seemed to strain to get out of his throat. “Thank you." He let go of the crow and looked at the floor. “I'm so sorry for snapping at you."
“You didn't snap—"
“I did. I felt it." He walked to his bed, sat down, and sighed. “It's just that… some bad stuff happened to me when I was a kid… so I got really scared."
A pang of nausea twisted in Melias' stomach. Did he trigger a painful memory? “I'm sorry. You don't have to relive that."
Ro shook his head. “Melias… I want you to know, because… um… well, anyway, when I was a kid, I—holy fuck, this sounds so stupid in my head—but, uh, I had a bully—well, I had a lot of bullies, but—"
“Ro—"
“What? Sorry, sorry. I'm just… I…"
Melias smiled. “Take your time."
Ro bowed his head and grabbed his fur with both hands. “I… just… you saw it, right?"
“Saw what?"
Ro lifted his shirt. “This."
Melias looked at the bruise. It had turned a strange mix of purple and yellow, but he quickly realized that Ro was talking about the other side. Three pink, parallel scars. Melias stepped toward the human as though a land mine were hiding under the floorboards. “Oh, yes. I did see that."
“Got it a long time ago. There was a bully at my school. Big wolf guy… his name was Kataasho. He fucked with me a lot. Made fun of my name. Said I wasn't a wolf so I wasn't allowed to have a name like a wolf."
Melias stepped closer, but didn't know what to say.
“He'd always push me around. One day—ugh—one day, he slashed me so hard that it tore my shirt, and… well, yeah. But, that's not, I mean—fuck! I'm sorry."
The crow sat next to Ro and put his arm around his shoulder. “Please don't hurt yourself."
“I'm… I'm fine." Ro exhaled. “One day, he… he… pulled my pants down."
Melias recoiled. “I'm sorry. That's awful."
“It was just me and him, in the washroom. No one saw it, so he… he… grabbed my balls."
Melias pulled Ro closer. He didn't deserve any of this. How he wished he could just take all of Ro's pain into himself. “I'm sorry. I didn't know…"
Ro shook his head. “When I say grabbed… I mean, he had his claws out and everything. Told me he was going to… rip my 'weird boney' off. He… he almost did. I still have a little scar on my scrotum where his claws went in." The last sentence came out of his throat like it was being forced out of a pinhole.
A pang of guilt ripped through Melias. He was so wrapped up in his own trauma that he didn't consider Ro's.
“Ever since, I've just… had a fear, I guess. And having a sharp beak clamp down—" He shuddered. “I'm sorry. I should have… held it together better…"
“I shouldn't have bit you. I will never do anything like that again. I hope you can forgive me."
“No, no, no! You couldn't have known!"
“Ro, regardless, it's not okay to bite someone's balls."
Ro snorted softly. “Okay, I guess… I guess that's true. W-why did you even do it?"
“I don't know. I got excited and it just happened."
“Excited? Am I really that… uh… interesting?" Ro asked, looking away as his cheeks turned red.
“I… like balls." The base of Melias' feathers prickled as he listened to his own words. Was he really saying that? Silence hung in the air like thick humidity, with Melias stewing in his own embarrassment.
Ro fidgeted, then finally spoke up. “I can't believe we really… really, uh, I mean, that's… I… we, uh…" He gulped. “Anyway, I've been wondering. What did I say that was so sensitive?"
Melias took a deep breath. This was it, huh? The big moment. Ro had shared his trauma with him, but his was understandable. It made sense. Melias' was stupid and arbitrary. Would Ro understand? Would Ro just laugh at him?
“If you're comfortable, I mean—"
Melias shook his head. “I'm not." Ro shifted next to him and started to say something, but Melias raised his hand. “But I will never be comfortable, so I should just say it."
“You don't have—"
“I want to. I… want to tell someone, and I trust you."
Ro put his hand on Melias' thigh. “Aw… thank you, Melias. O-okay, what is it?"
The crow closed his eyes. “When you yelled at me, you asked me if I would like having my balls bit, or something like that."
“Y-yeah, I guess I did."
“It's just that I… I… don't have any."
Ro gasped sharply and crossed his legs. “Melias, oh no, I—"
“N-no, I didn't mean it like that."
The human's wide-eyed expression changed into a confused one. “What do you mean? You… oh, wait! You're transgender?"
The question sucker punched Melias. He hadn't considered that interpretation. He stared at the human as he tried to figure out a response.
Ro suddenly got giddy. “Wow, I couldn't tell at all! Aw, Melias, you didn't think I'd have a problem with that, didn't you? Of course I—"
Melias didn't want to interrupt the human. He loved seeing that energy, even if it was misplaced. But this was important, and he didn't want to mislead Ro. “No, that's not it."
Ro's confused expression returned as his enthusiasm deflated. “Wait, you're not? So… what did you mean?"
“What I meant was, uh, I do have testicles. They're just… inside of me."
Ro scratched his forehead. “I'm lost."
Melias closed his eyes and beak and took as deep of a breath as he could. “My testicles are internal. I do not have a penis. I have a cloaca."
There. He said it. No going back. He sat there, statuesque, as he awaited Ro's response, but none came. Had he fucked it up? Had he misjudged Ro? Had he come all this way, only to trip at the finish line? Why did he say it? Things weren't so bad before. They could have been just friends. It would have worked. All of this was—
“Okay, and?"
Melias' eyes sprung open and he gawked at the human. “What do you mean, 'okay, and?'"
Ro leaned back. “Er… like, where are you going with this?"
Where are you going with this? Where are you going with this? He had, at long, long last, finally confessed his deepest secret, and Ro said that? Melias' head creaked forward, and he stared through the wall. All that terror, all that anxiety, all that grief, and for what? He nearly lost the love of his life, and for what? Because of hole, not pole? Ridiculous. Absurd. Unreal. He slowly shook his head. Then his face twitched. Then he started laughing. Not the uproarious laughter of a hilarious joke, but the gentle laughter of profound relief. But perhaps he should have been cackling; the universe truly did play the perfect prank on him.
“Melias? What's so funny?"
“Where are you going with this…"
“Did I say something wrong?" Ro asked, his voice getting quiet.
The crow smiled at him. “No… I'm very happy you said that."
Ro swirled his fingers against his eyelids. “Melias… you're really confusing me."
“You don't care. In a good way, I mean."
“I… what?"
“Cloacas are very rare. Something like one in a hundred-and-fifty avians. It always made me feel like a freak."
“You're not—"
“I know, I know. I can't explain it. I just feel very deep shame, and it makes me scared to tell anyone."
“And you thought I'd think poorly of you? For something you can't control?" Ro's voice had a whine to it, as though the suggestion hurt him.
Melias shook his head. “No. I knew you wouldn't. And I wouldn't want a boyfriend who would judge me for that. I don't understand why I feel this way. It just feels like I should have had a penis like everyone else. I guess that is kind of like being transgender… maybe. It's not that I hate my cloaca, but…"
Why wasn't Ro responding? Melias opened his eyes and looked at the human. Ro was covering his mouth with his hand, his skin red like a roaring flame. Melias furrowed his brow. “Are you okay?"
The word came out as a shaky squeak, but there was no doubt as to what Ro said. “Boyfriend?"
A cold jolt shot through the crow. What? Why was he saying that? “I'm sorry?"
“You said… wouldn't want a boyfriend who would—"
Ro's lips continued to move, but Melias didn't hear the words; the sudden ringing in his ears drowned out his voice. He leaned forward and put his hands on his head. A completely involuntary movement. His body wanted to run away in every direction.
“What do you mean?" Ro asked, sound once again getting through to the crow.
Melias shook his head. His body shook more. “I… I… I mean…"
“Do you mean that… like… w-with me? Boy… friends?"
The crow's heart thundered, on the verge of exploding. “I didn't—I didn't—I didn't mean to say that. I…"
“Oh… so you don't want to…" Ro said, his voice suddenly going very flat.
“I didn't say that." Melias' mind raced for a way to save face, but a moment of clarity forced its way through the fear.
Wasn't this exactly why he came here?
Everything Melias wanted was sitting right next to him. All he had to do was grab it… grab him. The crow slid his talons up Ro's thigh and onto his hand before wrapping his fingers around it. God, it was so soft. It was so warm. It was so right.
Ro took a sharp breath, then put his other hand on top of Melias'. “Really?"
Melias swallowed. His whole body trembled, and his heart was one good beat away from leaving his chest. “I'm not good at reading people. Is this what you want?"
Ro threw his body into the crow's, wrapping both arms around him, then yelped and backed off, rubbing his chest.
“Are you okay?" Melias asked. But Ro's smile shone like the sun on the morning horizon, answering his questions without words.
But Ro had words anyway. “I've never been better." He leaned in for another—gentler—hug, and nuzzled the side of Melias' face. He slid his hands up and down the crow's back. “Oh, Melias…"
They held each other close, with Melias taking care not to squeeze too tight. Oh, but did he ever want to. He wanted to pull his boyfriend—oh, that sounded good—as close as he could, feel his chest rise and fall against his, hear his breaths, have their hearts beat as one.
“Oh, no," Ro said, his voice getting shaky. “I thought I did all my crying last night…"
Melias quickly let go. “Sorry, did I do something wrong?"
Ro sputtered a laugh. “No, you silly bird! I'm crying because I'm happy… I didn't think I'd ever find someone who cared about me…"
“I care about you. I…"
The words hung on the tip of his beak. Despite everything, saying them still felt scary. Still felt dangerous.
Ro rubbed his head on Melias' shoulder. “You what?"
“I… I really care about you."
“Well… thank you." Ro said.
Melias heard the faintest hint of disappointment in Ro's voice. He knew why, but something was, even now, keeping the words inside.
Ro pulled back and looked at Melias. “Have I ever told you that you're beautiful?"
A jolt shot through Melias' body. He and his stupid, wrong coloured feathers, beautiful? Wrong. Unbelievable. A lie. He looked away. “No, you haven't… and you shouldn't."
“Wait, why not?"
“I'm hideous."
Ro gasped and grabbed Melias' shoulder. “You are not! You're the most beautiful person I've ever seen."
Even when it came from Ro, compliments about his appearance stung. “I am a crow. Crows have black feathers, not white. Everyone stares at me, like I'm some sort of exhibit at a circus. Like I'm just a freak."
“No! I love your white feathers—"
“I see other crows and wonder, 'Why don't I look like that?' Why do I have to be so different?"
Ro took Melias' hand. “I'm sorry. I know what you mean. I'm pretty weird looking, too."
“I don't think you're weird looking."
“I mean, look. My fur barely even covers my body. Honestly, I sometimes wish I were a wolf like my parents. Then I wouldn't look so strange." He paused, and his voice suddenly got quiet. “Then people wouldn't think I'm evil."
The sadness in Ro's voice flipped a switch inside Melias. His own pain and sadness were irrelevant now. He twisted toward the human and squeezed his hand.
“Nothing about you is evil."
Ro looked at the floor. “I'm a human. Everyone thinks we're violent, untrustworthy, and selfish. No matter what I do, I can't escape that."
“Those are just lies. Humans aren't evil. You are gentle and kind and sweet and—"
“I don't know… I hurt you yesterday."
Melias shook his head. “I hurt myself. I thought I ruined another friendship. And then I thought I'd have to live my life without you." Just saying it loud made Melias feel like he was being pulled apart. “Being with you makes me happier than anything or anyone ever has."
“Melias…" Ro's voice shook as he spoke. “That's… that's exactly why I was sad, too. I don't ever want something to come between us."
“I don't want that either. Do you forgive me?"
“Of course I do! Do you forgive me?"
“Always, Ro."
“Melias…" Ro said, falling back into the crow, rubbing his face against his shoulder. “I think I know why you have white feathers."
“W-why?"
“Because you're the angel I used to pray for when I was a little kid."
Melias put his hand over his beak. If he could turn red like Ro, he would look like Pop right now. No one had ever told him something that sweet. Fuck, he loved Ro. He loved him in ways he never knew possible. He wrapped his arms around him and fell backward, and the two tumbled to the mattress. As they gazed at each other, Melias stroked the human's cheek again.
“I'm not an angel, but I want to be there for you whenever you need me."
“That's what an angel would say." Ro closed his eyes and smiled, and the two cuddled in sweet silence.
Melias may not have been an angel, but he was in heaven all the same. He slid his hands up and down Ro's smooth, warm face. The human turned red, as he always did, and returned the touch, kneading his fingertips through Melias' facial feathers. It was such a life-affirming feeling.
“U-uh, hey, Melly…"
Melias stiffened. The word reverberated around in his head like a horrible screech.
“Hey, Melly, you wanna come over this weekend?"
The voice was not the soft, soothing voice of his boyfriend, but the energetic, high-pitched voice of a young possum boy.
“Whoa! You're really good at that, Melly!"
“See you at school, Melly!"
“Um… Melly? Is that you?"
The voice was deeper this time, but it hurt the most. The voice that filled him with such sadness, rage, and fear. Was this all just the calm before the storm? Would Ro betray him, just like Chekmak did? Or would he be the one to hurt Ro… just like he hurt Chekmak?
“Melly?"
Why must the voice torment him? Why did it insist on dragging him down and stealing his happiness from him at his highest point? Why couldn't it just leave him alone? Why did it—
“Melias?"
Melias blinked hard. The voice was not in his head. It was very real, and very worried. He looked at the slack-jawed, brow-furrowed human, and his heart twisted in on itself. It was too hard. Friendships, relationships… he couldn't do it. It was too hard. It hurt too much.
“Are you okay? Did I do something wrong?"
Melias' demons skewered him with their pitchforks. Every thought, another hole in his flesh. Every emotion, another reason to run. But before they could land a fatal blow, another voice parried the strike.
“I ain't gonna let the past steal the future, you know?"
Like a ray of light smiting the wicked, the demons evaporated. Xaza was right. Completely, utterly right. And if he was strong enough to overcome his trauma, Melias could overcome his. He stared deep into his frightened boyfriend's eyes and took his hand. “I'm sorry. That nickname carries some bad memories."
Ro put his free hand over his mouth. “Oh, I'm sorry… I thought it was cute."
Xaza's words continued to bubble in his mind. He didn't want a single word to have such a grip on his heart. He wanted it to bring happiness, just as it did when he was a child. “Say it again."
“W-wait, what?"
“The nickname. Say it again." Melias softened his voice. “Please."
“But you said—"
Melias gently gripped Ro's wrist. “Please."
“O-okay… Melly," Ro said, cringing as though being forced to say a slur.
The name was like a whip cracked over his back, but he smiled through his clenched beak. “Again."
“Melly."
“Again!"
“Melly!"
Melias exhaled hard. The past would not steal his future. He would not let it. Not now, not ever again. He was in control now. He decided what did and did not hurt him. And 'Melly' was going to be Ro's. All Ro's.
And then he realized just how silly that was, and recoiled. “Oh, god. I'm sorry. That was so strange, wasn't it?"
Ro giggled. “A little. Um… are you feeling better?"
Melias nodded. “Yes. Thank you, Ro."
“What happened? I mean, why don't you like that nickname? Uh, if you're okay with saying."
“That was what a childhood friend called me. We had a falling out, and weren't friends anymore. Hearing that name again reminded me of him."
“Oh, I'm sorry. I won't use it—"
“No. I want to replace those sad memories with happy ones." He smiled. “Memories of you."
Ro slid closer to Melias. “Are you sure?"
“Yes."
“Aww… okay, Melly. I hope I can give you lots of happy memories."
“You already have."
Ro sat up, smiled, then fell onto Melias, rubbing his face against his chest. “And you've given me so many, too."
Melias wrapped his arms around his boyfriend and combed his talons through his fur. This is how life was supposed to be. No fear, no shame. Just two people, utterly safe together.
“Mmm… your chest is like a pillow…" Ro said, rubbing his head back and forth. “And…"
“And?"
“Um, well." Ro chuckled. “Oh man, this is so weird and embarrassing…"
“What is?"
Ro sat back up. “Could you, um, take off your shirt? U-uh, just your shirt! I want to feel you directly… and…"
“And?" Melias asked again as he leaned forward and grabbed the back of his shirt.
“I… ah…" Ro swallowed. “Well, you'll see."
Being less than fully clothed around others, even his parents, always made Melias uncomfortable. But he pulled his shirt off with no reluctance. Hell, he'd get completely naked if Ro asked.
But thinking too hard about that was dangerous.
As the shirt slid up Melias' body, his chest puffed forward, his white feathers no longer constrained by the fabric. Ro slid his hands through them, and Melias giggled as fingertips tickled his sensitive skin beneath.
“Mmm… you're so soft, Melly. And you… you…"
Ro stopped and closed his eyes.
“I what?"
“Melly… stop me if this is weird, but I can't resist anymore…" Ro fell onto Melias, buried his nose in his chest, and took a deep breath. And then another. And another. He let out a low growl as he snuffled up and down the crow's torso. With each huff, the groans grew more intense, more guttural.
“Are you… having fun?" Melias asked, very unsure how to react.
“Your scent… holy fucking god… it just… it makes me so…"
Melias smirked, stifling a laugh. “Do I really smell that good?"
Ro's eyes flicked up, not taking his nose out of the crow's chest. “Do my balls really smell that good?" he asked, his voice muffled by his mouthful of feathers.
The laugh escaped, and Melias' chest bounced up and down as the human motorboated it. “I hope my feathers don't smell like balls."
Ro giggled into Melias' chest, then sat up. “Oh, god… I don't even know what it smells like… just… like you, I guess. And you smell so good…"
Melias looked down and smiled. And then he spotted it. With a clear line of sight to the human's thin pajama pants, his eyes locked on to a very, very noticeable lump.
Ro's cock.
His throat tightened as he stared. But it looked so large! Before, the bulge was barely noticeable. And when Melias saw it yesterday, it was small, wrinkly, and floppy. Was that really his cock?
Ro seemed to catch Melias' gaze. He crossed his legs and turned away. “Sorry. Oh god."
“I-it's okay," Melias said. “Why… why is it so big now?"
“Um… what do you mean?"
“You… your… it wasn't this big yesterday."
“A-ah, you mean… right. Um, it's just that when I, you know." Ro cleared his throat twice. “It grows."
“Grows?"
“U-um, yeah. It… grows."
Melias turned his head. He didn't understand, but he wanted to learn. “Can I… um…" His voice dropped to a whisper. “Can I see?"
Ro squirmed back and forth. “Oh god… promise you won't think it's weird?"
“Yes, I promise," Melias said, the words tumbling out of his mouth.
“Okay…" Ro slowly pulled his pants down. They caught on the bulge, straining and stretching until finally, with a jolt, Ro's cock snapped out, smacking against his torso.
Melias' eyes went wide. Gone was the small noodle from last time. In its place was something much longer, much thicker, much stiffer.
And much hotter.
“Can I… can I touch it?"
Ro's cheeks lit up like a ruby. “Sure… just watch the talons, okay?"
Melias nodded, then gently wrapped his hand around the human's cock. He wasn't sure what surprised him more—how stiff it was, or how warm it was. “Wow… so it just… transforms?"
Ro groaned and closed his eyes. “I know, I know. It's weird, isn't it?"
“I don't think so…" Melias said. “So how do you… masturbate?"
“I just pull up and down."
Melias nodded, then pulled down. The skin gave way, revealing a large, red, shiny bulb at the tip. Melias' veins went cold, and he splayed his hand open and pulled back. “Oh my god! I'm so sorry!"
“Huh?"
“I… I ripped it! I didn't know that it—"
“Melly, you didn't rip anything." He guided Melias' hand back to his cock. “Okay, pull up. Not too hard, though."
Melias did so, and the skin, after a little resistance, hopped over the ridge of the bulb, almost fully enveloping it.
Melias' chest relaxed. “Oh, wow. Does… does that hurt?"
Ro pulled down again, exhaling shakily and once again revealing the bright red tip. “N-no. It used to, a little… but not anymore."
Melias watched the motion of Ro's penis, mesmerized. The tip reminded him of a strawberry—though a strawberry never looked so tasty. Ro slowly stroked, and a bead of fluid leaked from the hole on the middle of the bulb. Oh, how Melias wanted to lick that up. Maybe he could just lean over and—
Ro put his free hand on the crow's lap. “So, um, I know you're really sensitive about it, so if you don't want to—"
“You want to see my cloaca."
The human nodded.
The crow closed his eyes. The tendrils of fear tried to coil around his heart, but something stronger protected it. Not arousal, not desire, not courage, but trust. Melias knew, not just with his mind, but deep in his heart, that Ro wouldn't hurt him now. He latched the top of his pants with his talons, and then pulled them down to his knees.
Ro giggled. “Wow, your legs are even fluffier than your chest. I had no idea you were so… well, fluffy. So, uh…"
Melias fell to his back and kicked his pants the rest of the way off. He spun himself around until his feet pointed next to Ro, then pulled his knees back to his chest and spread his legs.
Ro's eyes went wide as thrust his head toward Melias' groin. “Oh, wow… it's so hot."
Melias shuddered as the human's warm breath hit his sensitive hole. “T-thank you." His instincts told him to cover up, but he knew he was safe.
Ro swallowed. “So, um… how do you masturbate?"
“Like this." Melias slid his hand down his chest, across his torso, finally ending between his legs. He made a few swirls around his cloaca, and a tingle of pleasure shot down his legs. “This is how I start."
Ro's breath quivered. “Start? What happens next?" The human reached down and wrapped his hand around his cock. Each time he pulled the skin back, another drop of fluid oozed out of the bright red bulb, and every time he pulled it forward, that lovely nectar smeared all over, making the tip glisten like freshly-washed fruit.
Melias swallowed. His whole body filled with fire as he watched Ro masturbate, his cock grew slicker and slicker with each stroke. “My fingers usually aren't enough, so I get a toy, and I—"
“What kind of toy?" Ro asked, sounding nearly breathless.
The crow swirled his fingertip a little faster. “A dildo."
Ro pumped his cock some more. He dripped some more. Melias imagined himself lapping it up, and rubbed faster. Harder.
“I… I don't have any dildos for you to use."
Melias' whole body buzzed as he stared at the human's stiff length. This was it. This had been his fantasy for so long. A moment he never dared dream would come true. But it had come true, and all he needed was to take one last step. He wrapped his fingers around Ro's wrist and looked him in the eyes. “I don't need one if I have the real thing."
Ro trembled beneath the crow's grasp. His eyes slowly rose to meet Melias', and the colour drained from his face. “M-Melly… I… are you… oh god."
Doubt hit the crow. “If you don't want to, you—"
“Don't want to?" Ro turned his head and slammed his eyes shut. “I… I want to fuck your brains out!"
Melias gasped. Blunt words, but exactly what he needed. No ambiguity. Plain desire, clearly stated. Every part of him quaked. He was losing his virginity. He was actually losing his virginity. He was Ro's, in mind, in body, in soul. “I'm ready."
The human yanked his shirt off, then straightened up, standing on his knees. He pointed his cock, the tip slick and glistening with his leakage, toward Melias' cloaca. “O-o-okay. If I hurt you at all, p-please, tell me."
Melias nodded. His heart and head pounded with intolerable anticipation. He spread his legs further as Ro leaned forward and braced himself on Melias' thighs. A moment later, a wonderful, wet warmth kissed his hole, and he tensed up, threw his head back, and gasped. And then the feeling vanished. His head shot back up at Ro, whose dick was sticking up in the air, and, torturously, not pushing into his body.
“Sorry!" Ro said, a hand over his mouth. “Are you alright?"
“Yes. Keep going." Melias' voice carried a hint of desperation on it. He was so close. He needed this more than he needed air and water. He needed it more than he had ever needed anything.
Ro leaned forward once more, and Melias again felt that slick heat. Then, moments later, a stretch. His back arched as he groaned and dug his talons into the mattress. And then the pushing stopped. He looked up at Ro again, who looked back with a worried expression.
“Ro, please…"
“I'm really scared of hurting you…"
“I'll tell you if it's too much. Please, trust me…"
Ro nodded, then smiled. “Y-yeah. Yeah. I trust you."
And then the stretching resumed. Another grunt escaped his throat as Melias' insides stretched apart. Stretched more than they had ever stretched before. Every millimetre, a new burst of bliss as the human's leaky length forced him open. He remembered how much the human's cock dripped as he stroked it… and now that was all inside of him, lining his sensitive walls. His toys were nothing compared to the incredible warmth radiating from his lover's cock. And it kept getting better as Ro pushed deeper and deeper. Melias groaned and writhed as his hole strained to adapt to his lover's length.
Yet Ro kept pushing. How long had he been pushing for? Minutes? Hours? Perhaps Ro would push forever. The rest of Melias' existence would just be taking his cock ever-deeper, his pleasure ever-increasing. But there were signs that it was not meant to last forever. The pressure inside of him was more than he had ever taken before, and it was starting to be too much. His walls buzzed, then burned, much like the first time he had ever used his toy. But he clenched his beak, determined to take it all. Determined to be the best boyfriend Ro could ever ask for. The fire in his loins scorched him, but his love blazed hotter.
And then there was a tickle at the edge of his cloaca. Something pressed against his rump feathers, and the pressure stopped increasing. He took a deep breath and looked down at the human. He had taken all of Ro. The burning slowly subsided, but the ecstasy did not. He groaned and let his head fall sideways onto the pillow.
“You okay?" Ro asked.
“Fuck…"
“Is that a good fuck or a bad fuck?"
Melias looked up at the human and smiled. “You're almost too big for me." When Ro's expression widened, Melias quickly added, “Almost. It's perfect."
Ro looked to the side. “God, you were really moaning."
Melias had heard himself, but hadn't actually noticed until Ro pointed it out. He covered his beak and whined, as his face started to burn more than his groin.
The human giggled. “You must really like it."
“I love it." God… it was more than Melias had ever hoped for. But part of his joy was pleasing his partner. He spread his fingers apart, looking at Ro between them. “What about you?"
“It feels so good. You're squeezing me so hard." He let go of Melias' legs and fell forward, his hands landing next to the crow's head. “Can I… start thrusting?"
Melias nuzzled his beak against Ro's cheek. “Please." Another involuntary groan escaped him as the human's hips slowly pulled back. Melias' cloaca, never meant to stretch this way, eagerly snapped shut as the human's cock left him feeling so achingly empty. But he did not need to wait as the stretching began anew, and he took another sharp breath, digging his talons deeper into the human's poor mattress.
Ro whimpered and exhaled in shaky bursts, the warmth of his breath coating the crow's beak. “Melly… fuck…" He bottomed out again, then buried his face in Melias' chest. He took a deep breath and groaned loudly as he rubbed his nose back and forth. “Fuck, you smell so good. You feel so good." He looked up at Melias with a euphoric expression, then stuffed his face back into the feathers.
Ro's bliss only added to his own. His sensitive walls stretched over and over and over as the human settled into a steady rhythm. With each slap of Ro's balls against his rump, the last of the burning subsided, replaced with pure pleasure. His soft chirps grew to moans, then to groans, and probably would have become screams if the human hadn't lifted his head and pressed his lips into his beak.
Magic. Melias could find no other word to describe his first kiss. Though their faces had entirely incompatible shapes, it didn't matter. Their lips, beaks, and tongues bumped sloppily against each other, but the primality of it only turned him on more. He put his hands on the back of Ro's head, combing his talons through his fur, and pushed his their faces together. Their tongues jousted as Ro thrusted harder and harder, and Melias lost himself more and more. “Fuck! Fuck!" He could no longer control his voice. He didn't care who heard him. His brain was in a haze, trying and failing to adjust to this new, incredible world of pleasure. The sensitive walls of his cloaca clung to the human's cock, sending shockwaves of ecstasy through his body every time that big red bulb stretched them apart. In and out and in and out, every thrust pushing him ever close to heavenly release.
“Fuck, Melly," Ro said, panting as his thrusting stopped. “My legs… no one told me this would be so hard on the legs…"
Melias was insatiable. If Ro needed a break, he would endure, but his body instinctively knew a better way. “I have an idea."
“Huh?"
Melias twisted, pulling Ro down to the bed. The human's cock slipped out, leaving Melias horribly empty. But it would not last for long. He rolled over, guiding Ro onto his back, and straddled his waist. “Let me do it."
“O-oh. Okay."
Melias reached back and grabbed Ro's cock, barely having the presence of mind to make sure he didn't scratch it. He shuffled back and lined it up with his cloaca, and began to sink. After he felt the bulb pop in, he plunged onto Ro's hips. Pleasure ripped through him, and he moaned loudly as his back and head arched back.
Ro gasped and squeezed Melias' thighs, his fingertips digging deep into the feathers.
Melias' head flopped forward, and he smiled at Ro. “Let me do the work now." He nuzzled Ro's cheek, and began moving his hips up and down. Ro moaned in his ear every time he slammed his plush, feathery glutes into his waist.
The room filled with two pairs of moans as Melias bounced up and down. He closed his eyes and imagined that big, leaky red bulb splitting his insides over and over and over. His hips gyrated side to side as he rode the stiff length, his motions more circular than up and down.
“God, you're perfect… you're so perfect." Ro's hips shook, and he thrust up, meeting Melias as he descended. The crow warbled in delight as the impact quaked his whole body.
“Fuck… do that again," Melias said as he licked Ro's cheek.
Ro obliged, and the two slammed into each other over and over and over. He groaned and put his lips to the side of Melias' head. “You're gonna make me go crazy…"
“Then go crazy," Melias said, his voice turning into a snarl. “Fuck me as hard as you can."
Almost as soon as the words left his beak, a shock of pleasure ripped through his torso as Ro rammed deep. Melias' dug his talons back into the bed, shredding the sheets. But he didn't care. He barely even noticed. Each thrust overpowered him, draining his head of thoughts, making his legs weak.
“Melly… oh my god, Melly…"
Melias managed to lift his head enough to look into Ro's eyes. God, he was so fucking hot. The way his skin glistened. The way his mouth hung slightly open as he panted. The way his cheeks glowed crimson, as though they were hot to the touch. Melias unsnagged his talon from the sheet and touched the human's face. It was hot to the touch. Ro gasped, turned his head, licked the back of Melias' hand, then wheezed and looked away.
“Sorry… I'm… I'm just so."
“So what?" Melias asked.
“I'm so fucking horny… you're going to make me cum soon."
Melias made a strange throaty noise and let his forehead drop onto the mattress. Yes, yes, yes. Fuck yes. Melias had dreamt of this for so long. This is what he imagined every time he climaxed. He needed to hear Ro moan. He needed to see the pleasure on Ro's face. He needed to feel Ro's cock twitch as it unloaded inside of him.
Their shared rhythm degraded and became choppy. Though they tried to stay in sync, Ro pulled back as Melias lifted up, and his cock slopped out. Melias reached down to put it back in, but Ro grabbed his arm.
“Roll over," Ro said. “I think my legs… can handle it."
Without a thought, Melias obeyed, tumbling off Ro and lifting his legs in the air. The human slithered back between his legs, lined his cock up, and impaled the crow. Each slow, powerful thrust was indescribably wonderful. Melias writhed and twisted as Ro's big, beautiful balls smacked his rump over and over. He wanted this to last forever, but knew it wasn't going to last much longer. The human juddered as he thrusted, and not long after, he uttered the words Melias had been torturously waiting to hear.
“Fuck, Melly… I'm gonna cum… should I pull out?"
Acting on instinct, Melias wrapped his legs around Ro's hips and squeezed. “Don't you dare."
“Ah!" Ro dropped his head into Melias' chest and huffed deeply. “Oh… oh…!" Another deep breath, then a long, high-pitched groan. “Fuck!"
And then, with a powerful roar, Ro crashed into Melias. The crow felt every leap and jolt of the human's cock, buried to the hilt, deep in his body. He was being bred. He was being claimed. He was being filled with the perfect load from his perfect lover's perfect balls. His legs quaked and his cloaca spasmed around its invader as a violent orgasm ripped through his body. Semen spilled down his tunnel, crashing into Ro's cock. The boys bucked, thrashed, squawked, and screamed as the twitching, jumping cock stirred their loads into a slurry inside the young crow's tunnel. Each of Ro's short, sharp thrusts birthed pleasure anew deep inside Melias as his own testicles, hidden deep inside his body, spilled every last drop of bird seed that they could muster.
As the twitching—both his and Ro's—grew slower, spaced further apart, and he descended from his climax, Melias' head was completely empty. An absence of action and thought. Nothing but pure, timeless bliss.
The room was still, save for the panting of two exhausted lovers. Their chests rose and fell against each other. Their hearts drummed against their ribs. Melias could feel Ro's even through his downy chest. And they lay like that, nothing in the world mattering but each other.
“See, I knew you could do it."
The voice. His voice. The one that had done nothing but berate and put him down, all his life. It was finally happy. He was finally happy.
At last, Ro disturbed the peace, and he pushed himself up just enough to look at Melias. The human was red like a fresh apple, and shining like one too. He smiled the softest, most loving smile the crow had ever seen, his eyes twinkling like the proudest stars in the night sky. Melias smiled back, and combed his talons through his beautiful red fur, then slid his fingers down his wet, slippery back.
“You're perfect," Melias whispered. “I love you, Guurolk."
Ro's face trembled, and he buried it back into the crow's feathery shoulder. “I love you, Melly… I love you, I love you, I love you…" His voice squeaked as he wept. “Please… stay with me forever. Please don't ever let me go."
“I won't. Never." Melias wrapped his arms around Ro's chest and squeezed tight. The human gasped as his head shot up, and Melias loosened his hug. “Sorry. I forgot."
“Me too," Ro said, rubbing his chest. “I didn't feel a thing during all that…"
Melias caressed the human's back. “Adrenaline is very powerful."
Ro smiled and collapsed back onto the crow, rubbing his face against his neck. “That was so incredible… I don't think I've ever cum like that in my life."
Melias chuckled as the human's nose tickled his neck. “I know I haven't."
“God, it feels like there's so much in there…"
“It's both of ours."
Ro, already a vibrant shade of red, seemed to become an even deeper scarlet. “Wait, I felt a—oh god, were you… cumming on my dick?"
“Yes."
“S-so it's all… mixed up together?"
“Yes."
Ro shuddered and made a strange sound. “That's the hottest fucking thing I've ever heard… oh my god. I'm gonna get hard again…" He shook his hips a little bit. Their combined fluids squelched between Ro's semi-soft cock and the walls of Melias' cloaca. “Oh god, that's an embarrassing noise."
“It means you did a good job," Melias said.
Ro laughed. “W-well, I couldn't have done it without you." He pulled back a bit. “Damn, uh… I think a lot's gonna come out."
“I hope so," Melias said, then he clasped his beak. Did he really just say that?
Ro smirked at him. “Oh, you like this part?"
“Yes," Melias said, groaning.
The human fell forward and whispered into Melias' ear. “You like feeling my cum inside of you?"
Melias gasped. “Y-yes." Where was this teasing while they were having sex?
The human's voice got deeper and breathier. “Do you like it mixing up with yours?"
“Ro."
The sexy rasp to Ro's voice disappeared. “Sorry. That was really weird."
Melias put his hand on the back of Ro's head. “No… in fact, um… if we do this again… can you talk like that while you're fucking me?"
“If? Melly, we're definitely doing this again." Ro nuzzled Melias' cheek. “You're so hot."
“You are."
“You are."
Melias giggled as Ro pushed himself upright. He looked at the human's thin form. The claw marks and the bruise on his chest did nothing to diminish his beauty. If anything, his imperfections only made him more perfect. Ro was right about one thing—there was an angel in this room. But it wasn't Melias.
“Okay, Melly… we should probably get cleaned up now."
The crow whimpered softly, but he knew Ro was right. “Alright." The human's cock flopped out of him, followed by the biggest, stickiest gush he had ever felt. His thighs tensed, wanting to squeeze his legs to stop the flow, but he resisted and let it drain out, feeling it running down into his tail feathers.
“Holy!" Ro said. “Here, let me just—"
Ro leaned over to his side table, stretching for a box of tissues, and Melias got a close look at Ro's now soft penis. It dangled off his body like a wrinkly worm, a glob of their mixed semen threatening to drip off the tip. And it was so small! How was it so big just moments ago? Humans truly were fascinating.
Ro leaned back, tissue box in hand, pulled one out, and went to work on the mess between the crow's legs. “There you go… oh my god." He pulled a bunch more out of the box and continued wiping. “Nah, this isn't going to be enough. We're gonna need to take a shower."
Melias went stiff. A shower? Like this? He stared at the window, the sun now shining brightly. People would be up now. They would be showering too. How would he get out there, totally covered in two loads? Oh god, the canines would smell everything. “I… uh, I, how do—"
Ro snapped his finger. “Right, you need a change of clothes!"
Oh god, Melias hadn't thought of that. He could throw his back on, but if he did, they'd get all sticky and gross before he could get to the showers. What could he do?
Ro hopped over to his dresser then looked back at Melias with a mischievous grin. He pulled out a pair of underwear and presented them. “I think it's time I repaid your favour from a decade ago!"
—
Melias sat at his computer with Ro sprawled out, completely naked, on the bed behind him. It was the first time they had been back to his childhood bedroom since they had become a couple, and certainly the first time they had made love in it. For reasons he didn't understand, his mind was rarely clearer than just after sex, with his boyfriend's semen—and his own—drizzling out of him. And now, the insights were coming faster than ever.
The past month had been the greatest of Melias' life. The world was still scary and hostile, but the crow and the human found strength in each other that they didn't know they had. Still, things weren't perfect. Trauma heals slowly, and, as Melias had learned, when some wounds heal, the ones left behind can hurt more than ever.
He just couldn't get away from his past. It no longer controlled him, but it still stung. He wanted to truly free himself from his resentment… and his guilt.
There was only one way.
He opened up social media, and searched for a name. One hit, and it was exactly who he was looking for. He really had become handsome. Not as handsome as Ro, of course—no one was or ever would be. But a close second place. His cursor hovered over the 'send message' button. This wasn't the first time he had tried this. Fear always won. But not today. He had strength now. He had security now.
The springs of his old bed groaned loudly. Melias turned around and looked at Ro, who had sat up, his feet dangling over the edge of the mattress.
“Whatcha doing, Melly?"
Melly. A name Ro had claimed, but one the past still hadn't fully let go of.
Melias twisted his head and looked at his boyfriend. “I'm finally going to write to Chekmak. I just need to… just—"
Ro hopped off the bed. “No, no, I understand, but… you're going to get cum on your chair…"
The crow spun around and spread his legs, then patted the towel he was sitting on. “I thought of that."
Ro laughed. “C'mon, let's go get cleaned up."
Melias cocked his head and scratched the feathers at the base of his beak. “No. I… I have to do this now. I'm worried that if I don't, I'll get cold feet again."
“Ahh, Melly." Ro smiled. “I get it. But if I don't wash the cum out of my dick, it starts feeling really weird and squishy. When are your parents getting home again?"
“Probably not for at least an hour. We have time."
Ro grabbed Melias' cheeks and kissed his beak. “Okay. I'll leave you to write your message. Good luck." He walked out of the room, then stuck his head back around the corner, wearing an impish grin. “But if I come back and find you wimped out, I'm grabbing your wrists and typing the message for you!"
Melias smiled back. “Thank you. That means a lot to me."
Ro laughed as his head again left the room.
The crow looked again at his screen. Send message. Yes, he could do it. He clicked the button and began typing.
Hello, Chekmak. It has been a long time. I hope seeing my name does not bring up painful memories, but if it does, I would like to apologize. I'm so sorry for lashing out at you the last time we spoke. Guilt has weighed on me ever since, and I would like to make amends. If you do not wish to speak to me, I understand. In any case, I hope your life is going well.
Melias Kova
He leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes. Was that good enough? Was this really a smart idea? Maybe he didn't have to do it. But no—he told himself that he would not back out. And besides, there was a very real chance that Ro's threat was serious. With a shaky hand, he gripped his computer mouse, and sent the message.
And that was that.
Maybe he would get a response. Maybe he wouldn't. It was out of his control now. He slid his hand under his towel and pushed it up against his cloaca, then stood up and waddled to the washroom. As he reached for the door handle, he heard a soft 'bloop' from his bedroom. He spun around and dashed—as much as one can while holding a towel between their legs—back to his computer. One new message. His throat tightened, and he clicked it.
[15:37:48] Chekmak Eshtak: Hi Melly!!! :)
The name brought such happiness.