FSE

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formerly SoFurry search engine

A loud and very un-lady-like belch reverberated and echoed around the massive flame-lit cave. The sound died away to hyena-like giggles and snorting laughter. On the floor, lounging on sacks stuffed with pilfered clothes and finery for pillows, Kinj and Gnarl lay idle after their feast. Bones from goats, cows, chickens, and others from meats much more exotic mingled with the glittering gold and jewels from the pile along with upturned shields, helmets, and actual dishes filled with the remains of the meal.

"Nice one Kinj! Echoed right off the gods-damned walls!" Gnarl punctuated her laughter. As an afterthought to her comment, she took a pull of cringingly bitter ale from a massive jeweled tankard. Foam and dribbles of the beer spilled down her naked front as she carelessly and noisily drank. She then wiped her muzzle on the back of her bare arm and cut her own thunderous blast.

Kinj, well set by her own drink which was in a chalice meant for someone more than twice her size, doubled over in shrieking, yapping laughter. Her scaly tail thrashed, sending treasures beyond value skittering and rolling carelessly away. Already she'd had far more than was good for her and that left no thought for anything other than carefree amusement. This was stark contrast to her normally cold, reptilian nature.

Enough contrast that even a drunken gnoll might notice.

"Oy, Kinj!" Gnarl slurred, suddenly turning serious, "Y'oughtta lay-off," her words spilled out, "I think y've haddennuff."

Suddenly sensing that the mood had shifted, Kinj attempted to pull herself to her feet. Stumbling, barely coherent, she fell back onto her makeshift pillow as soon as she'd tried, scattering yet more of the treasure as the pieces shifted beneath her.

"Y'don' getta tell me_when I've had enuff... _YOU probbly had..." Kinj jabbered as she tried to right herself. She barely got her feet under and started to rise as she said 'had', quickly losing her balance again and falling with a surprised yelp onto her backside. Her yelp became a quivering moan that snapped Gnarl's drunken haze. Incoherent, yet excited words babbled from Kinj as Gnarl made her way over in a rush of uncharacteristic concern.

"YyyyaaaaiiiiI sat on summin'!" Kinj yelped at last, "An it went right in me!"

The little kobold rolled onto her stomach, pulling a surprising amount of treasure behind as a shaft of gold and platinum was yanked free from the pile. It stood, protruding at least two feet from between Kinj's legs, firmly embedded in her vagina. Gnarl couldn't help but laugh.

"Y'gotta pole in yer cooch!" She managed to say before howling with laughter again, "daaaamn that must've hurt!"

"Bugger you!" Kinj snarled, not amused at all, "Just pull it out will ya?!"

Still laughing, Gnarl reached out to take the handle and yanked. Almost effortlessly, the remaining foot-and-a-half of the heavily jeweled scepter slid free, leaving Kinj to gasp and shudder. As the light caught the head of the scepter, capped with a crystal orb as large as a grapefruit wrapped in filigree and surrounded with smaller gems, rainbows danced about the room and flickered as the firelight did. Gnarl was entranced.

"Didn' even hurt!" Kinj slurred as she recovered herself and looked at the invader, "Bloody buggerin' bitches... THAT didn't hurt at all!"

"I's that magic what did it," Gnarl said breathlessly, "Doesn't just work on dragon cocks. Doesn't just work on... arms... naah."

Gnarl lay back down on her makeshift pillow, spreading her legs wide, and slipped the scepter easily into her own slit without effort. She pushed, sliding the rod in until there was only a handhold left. A few steadying breaths, for the whole insertion had certainly felt real enough, found that she wasn't even particularly uncomfortable! All she felt was the sensation of a large, rigid something invading her nethers... and it didn't feel too bad at all. By all rights, it should be somewhere approaching her collarbone, but the dragon's magic had taken care of that too, it seemed.

"Oy!" Kinj piped up as she tore her gaze from Gnarl's perverted display, "I just... I had an idea... I think."

Gnarl only grunted in response as she began to extract the scepter once again. Dragon cock and fists were one thing, but pulling out something not attached to a body was quite another.

"Let's see what's the biggest thing we can get in us!" Kinj finished excitedly, "We could use that to get us out even more treasure than the big ol' bastard'll let us have! We just gotta hide all we can in'r cunts!"

"Brrillint!!!" Gnarl exclaimed, hefting the now-moist scepter high.

"Kay! We jus' gotta..." Kinj added, gesturing at the scepter, "Bigger'n'at."

The pair staggered through the piles, digging as best they could to find large, oblong, cumbersome objects. Staves and rods and long-handled weapons, statuettes and pedestals, vases and scroll tubes and any other curios that looked insert-able. Some were thin, but these came in bundles, while others were thicker than Gnarl's leg. Before long they had a pile of things in all description, gathered over centuries by their draconic host and tossed higgledy piggledy about the lair to be mixed in amongst the other loot.

Kinj started with a wooden club, thick and knobbly but shining with a lacquer sealant, sized for someone at least twice her size. She waved it tauntingly, not noticing the ease with which she hefted it. A grin that would be considered silly on a flatter face shone out at Gnarl as she eased herself onto her back and spread her legs wide.

"Hmmph, gotta start somewhere I guess," Gnarl sneered dismissively, "That big lizard's dick is way bigger than that."

Gnarl's words were lost on Kinj, who had already pushed the large end of the club up to her entrance. A bit of wiggling had stretched her lips apart, allowing the wide end to make its way inside. Kinj's breath quickened as the widest part of the weapon stretched her entrance, enjoying every minute of it without discomfort. Once the widest part was past, the rest of the club slid easily and quickly, disappearing into her as easily as a hand through water.

"You're thinking too small, just like a kobold would." Gnarl sniped. She pulled a golden statue of the chief gnome god forth to present to Kinj. The statue weighed hundreds of pounds by itself and was nearly five feet tall. "Now THIS is bigger'n that ol' dragon dong."

A thrill of horrid sacrilege coursed through her as she piled things around the statue to allow her to climb on top. The perversity of the act she was about to commit had her dripping wet despite herself, with drips of fluid hitting the top of the gnome god's golden head as she got into position. Balanced precariously, she used her free hand to pull herself open in preparation for the entry. The shock of surprisingly cool metal against her nethers caused her to shriek as her spread labia touched the gilded hair of the statue.

Gnarl grunted in delight as she felt her pussy sliding impossibly over the gnome's head. Her hips groaned in protest as the magic was challenged to make room for such a wide object so quickly. Giggling with a mixture of eagerness, greed, perversion, and morbid fascination, Gnarl gritted her teeth and pushed just a bit harder. Gnoll _babies_weren't so large as this thing's head, but as she felt her twat-lips close over the chin and jawline, she practically glowed with triumph.

Even as Gnarl was performing this act of desecration, Kinj was busy pushing a pair of smooth rods into herself. One was sliver, laced with colorful metals that defied identification, while the other was iron-grey and draped in chains. Both went in alongside the club-handle, stretching her further. As they settled in, she was yet pulling two more objects from her little pile.

Sliding down all the way, Gnarl stopped as she met the statue's shoulders. Try as she might, she simply couldn't orient herself in such a way as to fit them in. The shoulders were broad, the statue's arms akimbo, and acted as a perch. Gnarl suspected that had the statue been posed in a shrug, the angle might have been right, but for now she could go no further. Instead she straddled the statue, aiming to enjoy the ride rather than continue the game at the moment.

Meanwhile, Kinj was on her seventh and eighth object, this time a slender wand with a half-moon device at the top and an oaken staff roughly six feet long. The wand was more a novelty, but the staff was Kinj's true challenge. Stuffed as she was, it took a bit of doing to find space, though the magic adjusted to accommodate her. The staff sunk inside in increments as her inner walls clenched around the bundle, her muscles refusing to accept how much they'd stretched. Kinj let out little pants and gasps of pleasure as the sensation of fullness moved to an even greater plateau.

Finally the staff reached bottom, at a depth that should have had it coming out Kinj's skull!

An orgasmic shriek echoed around the chamber as Gnarl hit her climax, her pussy walls clenching so hard that she pushed the statue's head out of her, nearly toppling her off it. In shock, she let herself roll off the gilded idol and staggered back down onto the floor. She wanted to laugh when she saw Kinj and her inserted rods but her head swam mightily, causing her to swoon and half-fall onto the treasure.

Kinj had forgotten the game too, thrusting her bundle in and out as her own climax built. Of a sudden she shrieked, her peak finally reached. In echo of Gnarl, her pussy clenched, sending her objects squirting out. The things ricocheted about as she rubbed vigorously at her clit. One rod sailed straight into a wall.

And exploded.