Chapter Seventeen: Things We Can Forget (edit 3/20/2015)

Story by ScrambledCrackers on SoFurry

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#18 of Protecting Harmony Book 1: Pathfinding

I love the things you can do with dreams. They quite literally have no limits. They don't have to make sense. They don't have to follow a theme of a story very closely if you have a decent implementation. At least, that's my opinion. Dream sequences in stories are free to be unique unto themselves within a story and still mesh neatly because it's expected to be a self-contained world. :D

Edit 3/20/2015: Enhanced the conversation a bit and some stuff on why Luna turned into Nightmare Moon. Also a little more of my slow, secret process of reducing my use of pronouns not in speech.


With a slow and steady drift of awareness, I found myself becoming aware in the dream as a familiar sight greeted my unmoving eyes. Spread out as far as I could take in was a vast wild. A dense forest of huge trees with faintly twisting dual and triple half-merged trunks that seemed almost elegant, somehow not quite like redwoods or sequoia despite their size. The view stretched from one side of my vision to the other, rocky hills gradually leveling further away just enough to notice. Under the broad expanse of crystal blue skies, verdant green of the forest mixed with stalwart grey from the occasional bits of stone visible around the various somewhat jagged hills.

It was a sight I had seen many times in my sleep. My only real recurring dream. Allowing me to visit this place every month or so for a night with no rhyme or reason, having begun months apart and growing more frequent ever since I experienced that terrible night I risked my life to save that girl from monsters that had lost their humanity. The deep peacefulness was remarkable and carried into my day afterward each time it happened.

I merely smiled inwardly as I settled myself into the calming experience. For reasons I did not know, I had never moved a single muscle in this dream. Not even my eyes ever twitched to view anything beyond what I already saw. In a sense, it was a dream about a moment frozen in time. Unchanging and undisturbed, even as a gentle wind wafted through the trees I looked over from the cliff I was always perched upon.

As always, I could make out the faint sound of falling water not too far from where I rested in silence. It always brought to mind a beautiful waterfall, though I'd never seen the source of the sound. This was where I developed what I could only describe as dream meditations for lack of anything more creative to call it. Passing the time as I practically froze it from my perspective, experiencing my surroundings and releasing the stresses of the world amid the stillness. And with the day I'd had, it was a fortunate time for this dream to appear, letting myself sink into the sense of peace.

A short while later, something felt changed and as a presence gradually became known to my mind, I remembered inviting Luna to join me tonight. Though it had been somewhat brief, already I felt more at ease and the prospect of talking to her a little more did not feel frustrating now.

There was a subtle, deep ripple through my awareness when I guessed she properly entered my dream. Realizing I could sense her presence, in a way quite similar to how I felt Twilight's for whatever reason, I just let her approach. Not that I could move even my eyes anyway. Idly, I wondered why I never felt the wind in my hair, but always across my skin.

Luna's voice rang out clear, though it was curiously disproportionate in some way, like she was lower down and she was speaking from a distance. The note of interest in her voice caught my attention, "Greetings, my friend. I was certainly not expecting a dream of this sort the first time I paid you a visit. Your form is most...surprising. It is strange how yet another aspect of our divination spoke of you so directly when we had thought it another metaphorical representation and not literal. How are you faring now?"

While I would've liked to respond, and still tried anyway for a moment, this dream had never changed. I never moved, never blinked. I was, in a sense, trapped in my own head in my own dream, unable to move or talk. I mused about whether Luna could sense my thoughts, for it seemed the only response I could provide her.

After a somewhat lengthy pause, she spoke again, "Hmm...I have begun to suspect this particular dream leaves you frozen, does it not? That is quite alright, however. I am the Mistress of Dreams and we should speak for a time, regardless of the limits of this dreamscape. I will ensure you are given your proper freedom and not forced to wake in the process. Please try to move in a moment."

A strange sensation coursed through me after she spoke. Like tingles and pressing outward from within. As the sensation faded, I tried blinking. Once I did a couple times, I felt a rumble deep within my chest as the corner of my mouth, strange as it felt, curled a touch in amusement and slowly began to lift myself, now realizing I'd been laying on my chest. Things felt quite weird all over.

Suddenly, I froze in place as my eyes widened. My body felt very strange and trying to turn my head to look at Luna was quite off as I felt like my neck was far longer than it should be. Knowing it was a dream, I started wondering what my body was like out of curiosity, feeling little trepidation in the understanding this was all a mental expression and no physical matter.

Carefully and with growing interest, my eyes turned down to the arms I'd raised myself with and saw deep red scales covering my skin down the the red clawed handpaws. I felt my eyes widen, turning my head to look back at myself and seeing the form I'd thought was just imaginative fantasy all this time. Large leathery wings and a trail of spines along the middle of my back running down to the tail that seemed so normal to control.

My eyes turned to Luna, voice a bit wondering, noting my voice was unchanged, "Am I dreaming my form as I think I am? Shouldn't I be in my human body?"

She gave me a small smirk in return, "In this type of dream, to purposefully change your form would snap you awake, lest I induce possible harm by forcing too much upon your mind. It would seem that you held onto something from a very long time ago. Something in this vista meant a great deal to you in another life. That it left you more or less paralyzed tells me it was likely centuries, even millennia ago when you lived this. If you believe you are in the body of a dragon, then you would be correct. Is this so surprising?"

Even the arching of my brow felt different as I gave her a bemused look, "How did this happen? Does it mean something?"

At that, Luna's smirk grew a bit more, "Nay, it does not mean anything of much importance, though I believe your protective instincts may be more of a remnant than new in your current lifetime. Even dragons are yet mortal, in the end. As you are unlike any breed found in Equestria, I wonder what world you once lived in. The subtle tones of this dream vista tell me this was perhaps once your land, or something to that effect. I am afraid relics of your spirit will not have many answers. And in addition, we planned to speak on other matters this night."

The deep rumble in my chest sounded again, like a steady thrumming sort of chuckle, so far as I could fathom it. My eyes looked down at Luna, her form much smaller in contrast to this dream body of mine. I flexed a paw in the air as I looked at it, fascinated, but decided it was a recurring dream and Luna could likely help me explore things another time.

The feel of scales, the sharpness of the whole experience really, was so vivid even though a dream that I privately noted to ask her more about dreams some other time. Again I noticed she was small enough to fit in one paw with room to spare. Simply turning my head to her properly and feeling a little cheeky, I addressed her, "A possible home I once had. Interesting. So where would you like to start, oh tiny pony..."

Her brow raised slowly as the smirk spread across her face, "Do not taunt the Mistress of Dreams, for this is my domain. Even with the sights provided by your own mind."

While it was a move not unexpected, seeing her form grow equal in size to mine so readily was somewhat startling. She hadn't even visibly used any magic I could see. Her domain, indeed. Perhaps, I realized, I should be glad she didn't shrink me instead.

"My friend, this sight before us is a pleasant setting in which we might talk. Perhaps we shall do so again in the future." Luna said as her eyes turned out across the vast forest below us, settling on her haunches upon the broad cliff with a bit of visible inner discomfort, "Though you said as much, and that you still need some time, can you truly forgive Tia and myself our transgression?"

Settling in a sitting position not too different from hers upon the cliff, my long tail seeming to curl itself around my legs from the left almost on it's own. I stared at her for a moment longer before my eyes also turned out across the wild lands, voice somewhat quiet, "While I do need some time to actually work through it first, yes. In a sense, I suppose it means I have forgiven you both to an extent but am not yet ready to say it properly. Having cast the Judgement spell, why didn't you tell me at lunch the next day before Twilight and I left Canterlot the first time?"

"You had just endured a most troubling event. Forced to stare straight at the possibility of your own death. After Tia and I realized how deeply it had impacted both yourself and Twilight, we felt it best to delay speaking on the spell and allow you both to enjoy the relief. Knowledge of the Rose Window would not have changed anything about it and waiting for your next visit to remove it would have changed nothing of importance, if anything, from our perspective. We only placed it to ease your arrival in Equestria while permitting us enough time to observe your nature. In truth, we had already almost decided to remove it even before the Judgement spell. You had been nothing but honorable. With exception of easing the panic and stress of arriving in our world, the spell had very little reason to influence you the entire time. Yes, we could read how it affected you. As things return to you, you may find it all feeling shrouded a bit as if by a haze. I am truly sorry for the effects upon your memory. Even with our skills, the spell has variances for each recipient. I am certain that Twilight Sparkle has told you it will all return in due time." Luna said softly, the regret almost tangible.

A quiet sigh escaped me as my eyes closed a moment before opening again, "What about today? Of all times, why not in your magic lab while Twilight and I were alone with the two of you? Surely learning of it and having it removed then would have garnered far less trouble. I'd have still been rather angry, I admit, but it wouldn't have been like this past evening."

Luna scraped a hoof against the rocky cliff as her wings shifted from inner discomfort, more sadness in her voice now, "We knew with a fair degree of certainty of what we were going to have to tell you, my friend. It was intended to steal you away in the morning after you'd had a day to face that reality before needing to face another. Were you in Canterlot again sooner, we would have attended to the spell's removal much earlier. I apologize again for the error we made."

My eyes closed as my head lowered, the length of my neck in this dreamscape giving it a rather different feel. I was still upset with them, but at least I understood their thinking. I despised that they had toyed with my mental sanctity, but could see myself in their...er, hooves...and how it might seem like a sensible approach. It just added up to knowing after some time to accept it, I would move on.

On a lark, I tried moving one of my wings and after some hesitant figuring out of how, stretched it out and around Luna's back. Not pulling, but just resting on her back as if it were my hand on her shoulder. I felt her tense for several seconds before she relaxed again, my words coming out smoothly to her, "Luna...I have tried hard to remember to make the effort of thinking about other perspectives. I despise it no less, but I do see how your past experience could make it seem like a good idea. And how you felt you had reason to delay telling me. As I said, give me some time to work through it, to get all my memories back properly. After that, I believe I can let it go and let it rest. I bloody well know I've made some serious mistakes in the past. You and Celestia are all too aware of the worst ones already as it is. Just let me have some time and we'll let the Rose Window issue be forgotten too."

She mumbled a quiet thanks and leaned against me, otherwise quietly watching the forgotten world I must have lived in a very long time and another life ago. There was an even deeper feeling of peace in it all now as we sat together silently. Just two friends making amends. The wind casually wafted around us as the living moment in time from somewhere in the memories of my spirit carried on as much as it remained unchanging.

At another thought flitting across my mind, I spoke gently after a minute, "Luna, you said that yourself and Celestia had to endure centuries of the world fearing you and how it was from the display of your full powers as alicorns. What happened after she was forced to send you away to your moon? Or your return? Wasn't that another display of your power to the world?"

The Alicorn of Dreams was quiet for a while longer, though a faint note of relief was present as she began, "While it is true that attempting to throw the world into eternal night would have been a grand and terrifying display, it was something that happened in merely a single day each time. The common denizen of our world really only saw something not too unlike an eclipse. As it was the Elements of Harmony that brought me to task in my madness both times, there were no great visible events to mark the expression of power. Though of course It would not have remained so minor had it carried on longer. I cannot express just how thankful I am that I did not plan my attack upon my sister, that I suddenly flew into a rage irrationally. Had I done so, the cost would have been terrible and potentially led to breaking our vows not to wield our full power and brought about a second event. And before you ask, I am all but certain you are thinking it, my vow not to wield my full power was not broken, as I had cast a battery of specialized spells upon myself to enhance my power by fueling it with my own anger and distress. It is perhaps strange to hear for a mortal, even as understanding as you have shown yourself to be, but moving my moon is as simple as raising my own hoof. It is the same for my sister and her sun. To others, it is perhaps a great and grand task. For us, the task of guiding them is no more difficult than breathing and little of our real power required, such is our attunement to them."

Letting her words sink into my head for a time, I merely sat with her. A glance to the side as the thought crossed my mind revealed there was indeed a rather impressive waterfall nearby. Soon I found my words again, "You once wielded the Element of Loyalty. What was in that battery of spells you cast on yourself that made you go so far astray? Did the two of you garner fear those times?"

Her head tilted down a bit, "Tis true. I lost myself entirely. The various spells I used to enhance my power were many and complex. After study and hindsight, both Tia and myself discovered there was an uncorrected overlap in the spells drawing power from my emotions, causing a regenerative feedback loop I believe is a manner you will understand, that left me unable to restrain my fury. I had only meant to rail at my beloved sister, to vent just how hurt I was that she had kept dismissing the depth of my anguish. However, left in a terrible fury from my error in casting, blind to what I was doing, I tried to tear her apart. It will always weigh heavy upon my heart that I once tried to slay her. I remember every moment of my actions.

"After our fight ended, Tia was given some praise after the initial panic passed of us two sisters engaging one another in battle. As I understand it, she endeavored to have the whole matter blamed upon an accident in powerful magic where she could, though she did not know the truth at the time. Tried to permit me to have an undeserved reason for compassion after allowing myself to fall so greatly. It was not enough, in the end. After a time, she merely let it fade during the intervening centuries so the very memory could be considered nothing more than an old pony's tale. My return was treated not so dissimilarly. It has been sometimes difficult, overcoming the popular imagination of my darker self, though with help from the Bearers and my sister when needed, I have made progress. What fears and worries linger from the brief extension of night are otherwise mine to bear alone. Tia tried, but I refused her attempts to aid me in this. I require some form of penance."

With a soft squeeze of my leathery wing in comfort, the two of us returned to watching the vast expanse again. The need for words felt done and settled. I wondered what else the future was going to bring, considering all that had taken place since my arrival. Most of all, I just felt more at peace with the reveal of the Rose Window and glad I did not do anything I'd have truly regretted once I was calmed. I really couldn't afford to give up friends now. I didn't have the time left anymore.

After a period of peaceful mutual silence, though it felt sooner than I'd have liked, Luna finally spoke up.

"My friend, I thank you for talking and sitting with me as you have. I will try to find other ways to offer recompense still. You will arise soon, as the dawn is growing near. Perhaps another night, I will even help you enjoy this relic of your own history as you seem rather intrigued by it." Luna said in a soft tone, moving to her hooves again and stretching a little. I had to wonder how stretching worked for a dream form. If it was a mere mental holdover or something more, I could not say.

"I think I'd like to try this under more relaxed circumstances another time. Just goof off or something. I hope you feel a bit more at ease after our talk. It has certainly helped me." I replied, looking to her again.

She nodded smoothly, "It has helped to ease the discomfort. Before I depart, was there anything else upon your mind?"

A moment passed and a thought came to mind, the corner of my mouth curling again before growing into a rather large, toothy grin, "With your assistance in this dream, I am basically a dragon, right?"

"You are, in your dream form at least. Why do you ask?" Luna inquired with a raised brow.

"Just a silly little wish I've had for years and I have a moment to try it out. My apologies if this is unpleasant..." I told her as I rose to my feet, all four of them, and drew in a deep breath.

I could only guess what Luna's reaction was as I raised my head and let out a tremendous roar. It was an incredible feeling. The sound was still hanging in the air as the dream rapidly shifted and I flew towards the waking world.

My eyes cracked open and I looked to the window, seeing the sky slowly brightening. The vividness of the dream actually stuck with me. Perhaps it was being so aware. Perhaps it was Luna's doing. It didn't really matter too much. We had talked, put things a little more to rest and likely even grown a little closer as friends.

Realizing the giddiness of getting to roar was going to drive me nuts if I didn't express some of it, in addition to talking about the dream chat with Luna, I began trying to make gentle nudges while I worked to rouse Twilight, her legs and wing clinging to me possessively in her sleep.

With groggy, half-aware mumbles, she slowly raised her head to look at me. She went through some odd expressions as I gave her a passionate kiss in hopes of helping her wake up.

She made a low growl in the back of her throat and started getting more forceful in returning my affection, her eyes narrowing even as they cleared. As she pushed back against me with force, I began to realize things were off. Twilight's tongue didn't just slip into my mouth, she stormed the shore with intent to conquer.

When she moved to straddle my hips and started to roll against me with clear intent, I realized she was in an infrequent but not at all unpleasant state we'd been through together a couple of times in the morning. A strange effect we sometimes had on each other when we tried waking each other with anything intimate. My giddiness soon transformed into something else as I matched her, fingertips sinking into her wing joints earning another growl. This time, I returned with one of my own. After the day before, we really needed this to let off steam.

Celestia and Luna both were going to so enjoy teasing us later. Hopefully we wouldn't be too late to breakfast.