Night
A school party is turning point for one closeted pup. But how will he cope with reality not quite conforming to his dreams? Possibly first of a few irregular chapters of these two.
I hated parties. I never knew what to wear, what to say, what to do. I was determined not be a total outsider nerd though, so I went, and faked it as best I could. I had just enough friends, just enough cred, and just enough social smarts to get away with it. If I stood in a corner and mostly just nodded and laughed at the popular guys, people left me alone. Or even more; after agreeing loudly with the biggest sports stud in our school when he held forth on the topic of those dirty refugees, I got a smile and a backhanded compliment that made me feel all warm and gooey inside.
"Hey, you know Ryf, you're not as big a nerd as I thought."
That was one for the scrapbook. I kind of gave him a big "aww shucks" look then slapped his shoulder and had a bit of a good natured wrestle and everyone laughed, not so much at me as with me for once though and I felt the glow of approval, even acceptance and liked it. I even got a pinch on the ass from Tess, that sex goddess of a tigress. Her boyfriend scowled, and gave me dirty looks, and I could tell she liked making him jealous and I played along with it of course.
Little did he know he had nothing to fear from me. Nobody knew.
I had kept the secret well, almost too well. One proof of that was the fact I was here, at the invitation of the birthday girl, Natalie, a popular bubbly mare who was a natural at netball and hockey and well everything it seemed. I really did suck at sport, though I could almost manage basketball so I played and spent most of the game on the bench, getting my obligatory five minutes when the game was decided and everyone was feeling generous.
Natalie liked me though, I think she even had a little crush on me, but she was too busy positioning herself for a tilt at Prime Minister to do anything too much about it. She had that "mare of the people" thing going on though, and everyone got an invitation to her party, even a dorky Collie pup in year eleven with minimal social cred and a woeful average as a point guard.
The mare was working the party, like she always did, making sure everyone was having a good time, plenty of drink, plenty of food, people to talk to. She had that caring façade thing going on, I could just see her down the track as a conservative MP for a safe inner suburban seat like her dear Dad, a warmer cuddlier conservative, to appeal to the Doctors' wives and the socially conscious ladies who did lunch. Hurtle Llewellyn-Browne was a master at the art, and Natalie Llewellyn-Browne had almost been born with the twinset and pearls.
Thankfully the Honourable Member was not present to see a bunch of his daughter's underage school friends nuding up under the influence of beer and weed and doing unspeakable things on their carefully manicured pool deck.
"Hey Ryf! How are you? So glad you could make it pup...great to see you out and about!"
I nodded and smiled, trying not to bristle at the condescension. She had invited me after all; though her social standing was such that she could probably have invited anyone and still be exactly as popular.
"Cool Nat. Thanks for inviting me and all..."
"Aww...such a sweet pup you are Ryf. All the girls say so...you really are a nice guy. If you were to ask some of them, I think you would find them interested, just between us..."
I gave my practiced embarrassed smile and waved a paw, sucking on a beer to buy me time. I needed to shut this down fast.
"Thanks Nat but, I'm a shy guy, you know that. And I don't know what to do...I'm embarrassed..."
"Awww, you are too sweet for words. Not like most of the Neanderthals here, that's for sure. That's part of your attraction by the way...but I wont pry. Just, believe in yourself Ryf. Plenty of others do."
I had a disquieting feeling as she smiled at me, as if she might know, but I dismissed the idea and skulled a beer. Maybe if I found the footy guys and agreed with their sexist rants I could dispel any lingering doubts that may have caught an echo in the bubbly mare's brain. I had done so well, no sense in letting the cat out of the bag.
Disengaging from the mare, I headed for the rubbish bin piled high with ice and beer, and grabbed another. A Crown Lager; it all tasted horrible to me, but I needed the protective cover, and something to get me through the boredom, so I popped the screw top and chugged. The acrid taste hit the back of my throat and I almost gagged, bent over as my guts rebelled, and I wiped a paw over my muzzle to clean off the sudden coating of beer froth that had shot out of the top of the stubby in my overzealous attack.
A firm hand gripped me round the waist, and another patted my back.
"Careful mate. Don't want to let them know you can't handle a beer."
I turned to face my white knight, a little angry and a little embarrassed, but the anger died on my muzzle. It was Night; or at least that was his nickname. A pure black stallion, part quarter part shire, he was in year 12 and several sizes bigger than me. The stallion regarded me with a friendly eye though, but guarded. I could see the caution in his eyes.
My heart skipped a beat, and I could feel that feeling again, the one I remembered. I had it enough times when I saw him round school, on the running track, on the field. Even getting his lunch from the fucking canteen he was intriguing. I hoped to fuck he couldn't see that when he looked at me.
Night, or Grady as was his real name, was that rarest of rare breeds. Not horse breeds, though he was the only pure black equine in our school. He was out; gay, and openly gay. Nobody would even have known, but he admitted it himself one day as if it didn't matter, when he ended up in a huge punch up with one of his mates last year. It turned out his assailant's mother had found Night fucking his Dad, and shit had hit the fan in a big way. The big quiet stallion just shrugged his shoulders and admitted it when confronted, and it was on in earnest. The school gossip vine had worked overtime, and within a few weeks the story had grown wings, and everyone wanted to know but the stallion just ignored them, except to admit, quietly but firmly, that he was gay.
The reaction had been interesting to say the least. As a year ten at the time, I watched the goings on from a place of relative safety, sharing the gossip with my circle of friends and joking about pillow biting and fags along with the rest of them. Inside however I felt a terrible mix of feelings.
On the one hand, I was so pleased to see another guy like me. I had known for a while I was gay, that terrible secret I tried to keep from everyone , including sometimes from myself. At other times, I was almost jealous of him. Everyone knew; he could be himself. And secretly, from a distance, I found myself admiring him, and finding I had a teensy bit of a crush. Well, maybe more than that, if you count jacking off to the sight of him playing footy with his top off, and imagining him begging me for a kiss. He was strong, big, self confident, almost unaffected it seemed, a stallion sure of himeslf.
I was naïve, of course. The backlash came in a hundred different ways, but it came. Already something of a mystery figure, Night retreated further under the torrent of jibes, the exclusion, the gossip. Some said it was because of what he had done to his mate, but I could tell that was cover. They just didn't want the social risk of being round a gay guy. Even his footy mates kept their distance.
Now here he was, with his arm around me, my fantasy crush, and I felt the butterflies. I also felt totally tongue-tied.
"Are you ok? Not choking or something? About to pass out from the booze?"
He was looking at me a bit worried now, and I gave him a smile to reassure, though I had to admit I managed to smile mainly at his crotch as I couldn't avoid staring at his magnificent bulge as I did sometimes at school. Here it was though, up close, and I could almost think I saw the outline of his flare on the fabric of his cargo pants. I gave a slight whimper.
I felt his hand grip me and squeeze.
"We better get you inside and somewhere to sit."
Yes, that did sound like an excellent idea.
Here I was being escorted inside by my idol. I was exerting every ounce of control not to have a full on panic attack. I hadn't had one since my sister and her friends had locked me out of the house in my underwear, and I wasn't about to have another if I could help it, not with this studly horse next to me.
We made our way inside, and nobody seemed to show any interest. My saviour must have been hiding in a corner anyway, I hadn't noticed him there before. Probably Natalie showing how inclusive she was, inviting the dark horse (no pun intended), but he had the good sense to not cause trouble and stay away from some of his mates who still bore a grudge. He had seen me though...
The thought hit just as we found an empty bedroom. From the random junk, it looked like it belonged to Natalie's big brother. He was away at uni, and hadn't come home for the mere school kids party for his sister. What a douche...then again, I did remember the tall athletic horse, and he was hot. Maybe I wasn't angry on Natalie's behalf but more because I had wanted to perve.
Sitting on the bed, trying hard to breathe normal, I realised I had even better perve material right here, and that my crush had noticed me enough to care. That felt indescribably warm inside, and I managed a smile just for him, letting some of that warmth leak out. I even managed to look him in the eye and not the groin.
He was looking back, with really deep brown eyes that looked kind of sad. He nodded once, and flicked his mane in an unconscious gesture.
"I'll get some water."
He stood and trotted casually towards a door in the far wall. When it opened, I realised there was a little ensuite bathroom in there; this house really did have it all. As the cheers and laughter came from downstairs, my stallion came back bearing a dirty glass filled with water. I took it gratefully and had a long sip.
"So...Ryf, isnt it?"
"Um...yeah..." Oh God, he knew my name.
"Yeah 11. You play basketball with the firsts don't you?"
I tried not to gush. I failed. "Yeah! Wow...you seen us play?"
"Once or twice. You have a decent shot on you mate. When you take it..."
It was one of my failings. Always pass, always pass...I had it drilled into me from a young age. Get the ball to someone who was good, unlike you. I remembered my captain saying it exactly like that, when I was promoted to the firsts, and I didn't even hate him for it, just nodded and did what he asked. I only took a shot if we were twenty up or twenty down and it couldn't possibly matter. But somewhere inside I hugged a secret pride from standing under a fucking hoop all night throwing baskets until I was passable, even better than passable. I was stubborn you see. And the stallion had noticed.
"Um...yeah, I'm not bad from the free throw line either..."
He gave me a pat on the shoulder and a hug. I melted. "Hey, if that unconscionable asswipe Jericho tells you otherwise, I will rearrange the stupid badger's muzzle for him."
That got me laughing. Our captain the terribly serious badger was a bit full on, and somehow I couldn't see him taking on the big stallion and winning. As I looked into his face again, I could see the signs of a few broken noses and other things, a scar above the right eye, one down the left cheek. The stallion had taken some hits in his time. Footy was a brutal game I guess.
"So...how long have you been perving on me?"
I snorted up my water, snorting it out my nose all over my lap then almost collapsing in a paroxysm of coughing. He calmly patted my back, and had the sense to take the glass off me before I dropped it on something hard and broke it. I noticed he had lit up a cigarette, then my eyes bulged harder as I realised it wasn't a cigarette, well not exactly, and the scent coming from it was more herbal than I had expected, rich and sickly sweet. He was watching me now with an appraising look, waiting for me to speak. I said nothing, and he just waited, then held out the joint with a wry grin on his muzzle.
The smoke burned my lungs, and I started coughing again, and felt like I might throw up. I had never even smoked a normal cig, let alone this before. I was determined not to look like a novice though, so I took another long drag and inhaled. I managed not to die this time, though my diaphragm tried to break free of my body in a fit of suppressed coughing.
"Smooth."
"Ahh...*cough*...yeah..."
"Do you like it? Special crop, get it from a mate. Rich with a long slow high and not too much afteburn...perfect for some long slow fucking..."
I felt like I was in some sort of surreal movie now, and at any stage someone was going to come through a wall an show me the camera. I could almost feel my heart beating, then I could feel it stop beating. Now I could feel my claws growing; I started at them, a little fascinated.
"Um...fucking...yeah..."
"So, how about it mate? You're gay, I can tell, and you want me, I can tell that too. I feel like a good fuck tonight, what about you?"
Suddenly it was very very real. I could feel my sphincter clench, anticipating the pains to come. My cock had its own ideas though, and it petitioned for its own rights.
Psst...Im hard. And you know you want him, you've wanted him for like ages, and here he is, wanting you...what are you waiting for you coward?
For some reason I looked at my groin, as if needing confirmation that my dick wasn't lying. It wasn't; I was sporting major wood, tenting my casually stylish jeans something fierce. I looked across at the stallion, leaning back on the bed, totally unruffled like he did this every day, slowly consuming the joint one smoke ring at a time as he looked at me with a kind of hungry look. He had the bulge too, though his was massively more impressive.
My tailhole wasn't convinced yet.
Hey, you there, virgin. This is probably going to hurt. And you know you wanted the whole romantic thing with like rose petals and undying love. Does this look like it to you?
"Ahh...I...um..." For some reason my muzzle couldn't work, possibly because my cock and tailhole were having an argument and left my brain to it, which had kindly turned to mush. My whole muzzle felt kind of numb in fact, and I ran a claw along my teeth searching for sensation. There was none. My muzzle had gone to sleep.
"No pressure mate, but if you want it, it's yours. Offer good for this night only."
"Umshityeah..."
It seemed that my cock won the battle for control of my muzzle.
"Great. Stand up then..."
I obeyed, in sufficient hurry that I almost fell over again. He gripped my hips, steadying me, and shook his head when I went to try and pull my top off.
"Nah...leave it on..."
Ok, I reasoned. This is new. I decided to leave it to him; after all, I had no fucking idea what I was doing, but he seemed to, so I would bow to superior experience. His fingers fumbled with my belt, finally undoing the clasp as I took a long drag on the joint and almost passed out. Then he slid my jeans down and I did black out a bit as he gripped my cock through my briefs.
"Ohh...fuckk....."
I shook a few times and unloaded into my briefs, flooding the pouch with a torrent of hot spoo. I hadn't jacked off for a few days, anxiety and fatigue combining to take away my libido. It had bounced back big time, way too big, and I couldn't bear to look at him in shame as he stroked my still twitching cock through the fabric.
"Cool....that's hot man..."
I never knew premature ejaculation could be so sexy, but his voice sounded sincere, and I looked reluctantly into his eyes to see them gleam with lust and not laughter. He inched my briefs off my cock, which was still achingly hard and now coated in cum, and he reached in for his prize.
My first blowjob, and the sensation was too much to describe. I threw back my head and howled, until he pulled off and gave me an angry look, and I gave a sheepish grin and clamped a paw over my muzzle. He opened wide and deep throated me, right down my shaft and further, his flexible equine lips effortlessly taking the bulge of my already swelling knot. I felt his lips rasp against my groin, the huff of warm breath on my pubes and into my navel. It tickled; it did more than tickle.
"Holy shit..." well, I never knew sex could be so good. And so far it was worth a good few holy shits, and then some.
One big equine hand cupped my fuzzy sack, teasing the hairs. My thighs locked, tensed, ready for another wild cum, and he seemed to sense it and backed off a bit, using his tongue on my tip instead as a finger slid behind my scrotum and up...
"Fuck...tight..."
"Yeah..ahh...AHHHH!"
He rammed in, hard, the bastard. I felt my poor tailhole spread and stretched the sensation a cross between a burn and a dull ache. He began to saw in and out, roughly, and I whimpered again, but his tongue felt so good on my cock. Then a second finger joined the first and I was begging him to be gentle, but that made him spread his fingers and really open up my ass. I was about to cry out when his muzzle covered mine and I lost the scream in a kiss.
He had stood while I adjusted to his fingering, and I hadn't noticed. Now I did; his muzzle devoured mine, tasting of beer and weed and lentilburgers with tomato sauce. I melted again, even with his fingers deep in my virgin hole.
Then he gripped the scruff of my neck and pulled back and I arched my neck and let out a submissive woof and my tail flopped everywhere at a hundred revs a second. I had a bit of poodle and spaniel in me, or so I was told, and it gave me a stupid sort of corkscrew shaped tail that kind of moved like a propeller rather than wagging properly. It was doing it now, as he locked down my throat and a part of me willed him to bite but he didn't.
Instead he used his grip on my scruff to frogmarch me to the door, while I tried hard not to trip thanks to the pants binding my ankles. I had a moment of panic as I thought he was about to throw me out of the room with my pants around my ankles and my dick out. Instead he rammed me against the closed door, and I faceplanted against Natalie's brother's poster for Eminem and I slobbered all over Marshall Mather's face which is something I never ever wanted to do to the real thing.
"You're in heat pup...like a good mare..."
"Oh shit...wait..." the fear started again, and the doubt. My dick had got me this far, now it was bailing out on me an leaving a scream of terror in its place.
Fuck you cock. How did you get me into this?
I felt him behind me, heard the sound of a zip, the soft whoosh of his cargos dropping to his thighs, the flap of his tail, freed from clothes, swinging like a battering ram back and forward. I felt the flick of stallion tail against me, on my thighs, my hips. His fingers left me, and I gasped, suddenly lost and needy without their massive weight under my tail, but it wasn't for long. He reached for his pocket, pulling something out I couldn't see. My head was flat against the door, and I tried to look back to see what he was doing but all I could see was the broad bulging chest of an equine still dressed in his polo top, and his ears twitching as he worked on something behind me.
I felt fingers again, but now slick, wet, cold...
"A bit of lube for you pup...don't want you too sore..."
"Ahhh..."
Then I saw him grip a plastic pouch between his teeth, and one dextrous hand worked to free the contents. I stared at the latex bundle, so small it seemed, and he at last noticed me looking back with fear filled eyes. He gave me a wink and reached down to slide the condom on his length. I hadn't even seen him yet...but I was going to feel him soon enough.
"Now relax pup..."
Easier said than done. I felt the heat of his tip, so flat and wide, and I panicked. I tried to cry out, but I felt his hand on my muzzle muffling my yells.
"I said relax..."
It hurt. It burned, and my tight ring tried to stop him entering but he pressed on and eventually I opened and his fat flare spread me so wide and I almost fainted. He didn't let up, even when I bit down on his hand, just nickered and huffed and pushed and I felt it slowly slide into me, even when I thought there could not possibly be any more. My eyes stung with tears, and then a blissful moment of peace as he waited, hot and throbbing inside me, and my ring which was in spasm began to slowly relax around his girth.
Then he pulled back, just a little, and thrust and I felt his medial spread me and I yelled into his hand again, no longer afraid of seeming like a coward.
His hooves kicked my ankles, spreading me wider and I felt the stretching as my ass tightened around him, and he licked my neck with long slow laps of his tongue. His muzzle found my ears, and he nipped the tips, making me woof, and whispered in my ear.
"You know what's hot pup? Fucking like this, up against a door, knowing people outside might know you are getting it, seeing the fucking door move each time you get stuffed...wondering if anyone is going to try and come in...do you think they are out there pup?"
"Mpfghhr!"
"Yeah, I bet they are..."
He pulled back, wiggling his hips teasingly, his flare still buried several inches deep in my ass and scraping over already overstressed skin, then he slid in slow, all the way, and I exhaled until I thought I could never breathe in again and felt his balls against me, hot and heavy and rolling against my crack. I whimpered, softly, and he kissed my neck again.
"Good bitch..."
He began to thrust, harder and harder. Every time I felt my whole body slammed against the door, my muzzle scraping over the poster, claws scrabbling on wood, cock on paper, the tip now leaking shamelessly. I could feel the excitement building even as I hurt, and I tried not to cry as he took me like a total rutting stallion bastard and I liked it and felt ashamed for liking it. I pushed back into him even though I hated to do it, and he spread me wider and bit my neck enough to draw a cry. His hand had left my muzzle now, and slid down to cup my hips for leverage as he fucked, letting out a long series of whinnies and snorts and horsey grunts that sounded hot as hell and I felt his tail flicking harder and his balls crushed against my taint.
Then he gripped my cock and stroked. I couldn't hold it, and I let out a howl as I sprayed the poor poster in lines of doggy cum and my poor ass clenched so tight around him I swore he could not move. He did though, thrusting and forcing me wide again until I felt him jab hard and he bit my ear painfully and huffed out his orgasm into my depths and I felt a spreading deep warmth in my ass to match the painful burn of being battered by a stallion in my virgin tailhole. He pressed me against the door, panting, and then pulled my muzzle round into a hot hard kiss.
The feel of his withdrawl was the worst most empty feeling in my life. I suddenly felt shivers all down my spine, and my hole felt so sore now he wasn't there. I looked back, still plastered against the door, as he casually pulled up his pants. I got a view at least, at the massive horsecock that took my virginity, watching in awe at the pulsing throbbing mass as he calmly stripped off the condom with what looked like a litre of thick horse spoo in the tip. He did his belt up and took a drag on the butt of the joint while he tied off the rubber, then trotted into the bathroom to clean up.
When he came out I was sitting on the bed. I had got my own jeans up, though my arse felt sore enough that it actually hurt having my briefs on. Night looked pleased with himself, grooming his mane in the mirror before he gave me a wink.
"You are a sexy one pup, that's for sure."
"Thanks. I think..."
He could see my disappointment, and my distress I think, though I tried to hide it.
"What's wrong?"
"I dunno...don't we get to cuddle or something? Wham bam thank you man?"
He looked distressed, and a little angry, as if he realised something, but it wasn't going to change him.
"Nah...none of that lovey dovey shit. Cmon...you got what you wanted didn't you?"
"Well..."
"Sucked off...check...tailhole well stuffed with stallion...check...cum all over the place...check...one hot as fuck quick bit of fun..."
"Yes, but..."
"So what's the problem?"
"Nothing..." I died a little inside saying it. His ears perked up though, and his eyes shone, and I hated myself but liked the effect in him. He rubbed my ears, and then my chest, and gave me a long slow kiss.
"One day you will find someone who loves you and can be the Hallmark card pup. I'm not that guy...you knew that, right?"
"Sure, of course, studs will be studs right?"
"Exactly...so, do you think anyone knows?"
Well, if they didn't outside, chances were Natalie's brother was in for a shock when he came home to find his poster covered in lines of Collie spunk.
When the door opened, no one was there, and I didn't know if I was disappointed or relieved. Most guys were itching to tell their mates they lost their V-Card, so much so they usually made it up well before the actual deed got done. It was another of the things making me feel a bit maudlin after this; there was no one I could tell, and the only person who knew was suddenly looking very different in my eyes.
He pulled out another joint, and lit up, taking a long toke. He handed it to me, but I declined. The buzz was kicking in, and I felt kind of dizzy.
"Well...see you round pup. If you want another time...I'm up for it. You have one hot as fuck ass on you there..."
"Thanks...err...not staying?"
He closed his eyes, savouring the smoke. His face looked oddly peaceful like this, almost young and innocent. A stupid idea I knew, but I think I loved him a bit more when I saw him like that.
"Nah...heading out. Things to do tonight, people to see, shithead wannabes to avoid...and too many of those here."
"What about...what about Natalie?"
He looked a little pained then, and I wondered what it meant, but he shook his head as if to ward off something. "She's ok...most of them aren't, but she's ok."
He gave me a wave and trotted off into the night, ignoring the bunch of footy guys who had linked arms and were singing Khe Sahn off key while sinking bottles of Hahn light.
I stumbled into the back yard, finding a quiet corner to gather my thoughts. My ass hurt...I reached back to give it a tentative stroke through the denim and winced at the touch.
"You ok Ryf?"
The mare was back, looking concerned.
"Yeah...ok..."
"Where did you disappear to?"
"Um...off with Night..."
"You weren't in Donny's bedroom were you?" I saw her eyes go wide, the look, a nod. Well, that answered the question. Someone did know."Well..."
"Yeah..." and then I burst into tears and fell into her arms like something out of a bad chick flick. I used her mane as a tissue, mopping up the snot and tears, not caring how bad it looked.
"Hun...what happened..."
How do you describe that? When you had a crush, a secret love with thoughts of long slow gentle loving and loudly proclaiming how much you meant to each other and rose petals and candles and sensual kisses and it happened and...everything was different, like a parallel universe. And yet, part of me really liked it, and when I came I felt my body melting and pouring out my cock. Along with my heart...
"Nothing..."
"If this is nothing, I'd hate to see something Ryf. What did the bastard do?"
"Nothing, really..."
Just stole my heart, and my cherry, and left me with neither.
"Nat...I could do with another beer."
It seemed to work with the footy guys, not thinking about anything when you were drunk. Maybe it would work for me too.