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After some more sexings at my house me and John had to separate because we had different classes before lunch. He went to the potions class, while I went to the dark magic/occult class. This is obviously my favourite class, because it ha the coolest teacher in this whole fucking castle school: Johan Krauss! One of the very few satanist teachers in Hogwarts (though there are a lot of la veyan preps), was once an atheist philosopher (ew!), but converted to satanism in his visit to France and joined the nazi party in Germany with some dude called Hellboy. Eventually he grew tired of blowing christian, atheist and jew heads and went to Oireland, where he became the teacher he is now. He moved here to Hogwarts one or two months before I arrived, and we became good friends. Too bad he's reduced to a ghost in a walking suit, 'cos I'd love him to fuck me.

"Come in Rick, I've been vaiting for you! I could not start a lesson wizout my favourite student!"

I smiled and I went to sit next to some random prep from Griffindor. Today Johan Krauss was wearing his favourite suit, a magnificient black and red astronaut sort of thing. He had an inverted vatican symbol on the chest (confirming his status as a satanist cardinal) and inverted crosses on his arms and legs, with satanical hieroglyphs everywhere on his suit. His helmet was decorated with the words "Fook U!" and a badger and a snake killing a lion and an eagle, an homage to Hufflepuff and Slytherin.

"Attention class, today ve are studying something very important! Ve are going to learn how to summon ze Hogvarts Gods!"

"Really!?" I said excited

"You can bet your ass ve vill kiddo!"

"Yay!" em and the other satanists screamed in joy

When we did that many fucking preps stared at us confused or with "so-what?" looks. Mr. Krauss showed them his middle finger in name of us the Hufflepuffs and Slytherins. Then a very retarded hindu prep girl called Parvati Patil said:

"What are "Hogwarts' Gods"? Surely they are much less important than me"

This enraged Johan so much that smoke came out of his helmet's openings.

"VAT!? How do you dare being so rude!? If you knew anything you'd shut up you vhore!"

Stupid Parvati got sad and began to cry. Nobody (not even the other preps) cared.

"Anyvay, ze Gods of Hogvarts are a very important part of our history and I hope all of you understand zeir importance and significance. As you may know, Hogvarts vas founded by Satan when Jesus Christ vas born. After he built the castle he hired four random roman soldiers to guard ze castle and prepare the eventual arrival of the Anti-Christ. Zose soldiers vere Godric Motherfucker, Rovena Vhore, Helga Avsome and Oliveira Salazar. Zey served so vell zeir purpose zat ze Dark Lord turned zem into deities, and granted zem ze names of Gryffinfor, Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff and Slytherin. Now it is our duty to pay zem homage for zeir magnificient vork and zat's vy ve..."

Then we noticed that all the preps from Gryffindor and Ravenclaw had fallen asleep. How insolent! Poor Mr Johan sighed.

"Vy exactly zese ignorant preps/la veyans are velcomed into such a great school as Hogvarts I cannot understand. Vhen Hufflepuff and Slytherin vere mortals zey fought against ze atheists and christians, and yet ve allow zem into our noble school! Damned are you stupid Dumbledore! Scheiße!!!"

"Don't feel bad mister, we are still listening to what you say"

Saying that I got up and hugged Johan Krauss. And he hugged me back

"Oh, thanks Rick, you're ze best student a satanist can have!"

I smiled and I then returned to my sit. Happy and proud again, Mister Krauss opened a hole in his suit's middle finger and part of his essence came out as white smoke (he is still working on a way to turn it black, green or red), which passed through the air until it reached Parvati Patil's ear. It then went inside until it reached her stupid hindu brain. Suddenly, Parvati woke up and screamed on top of her lungs, waking the other preps that were sleeping. She then got off her sit and began running around like an ostrich. Everyone laughed, and then she took off her clothes and began masturbating with a pencil. She only stopped when the essence came out and returned to Johan's suit (but, of course, none of the preps noticed), leaving the student alone, but she was still naked. Everyone was laughing and some studs were masturbating at her sight, leaving her so embarassed she began to cry.

"Parvati I'm very disappointed at you" said Krauss, pretending he wasn't responsible

"But it wasn't me! It wasn't me..."

Parvati began to cry again, and then Snape entered the room. The sight of seeing an underage girl undressed made him horny and so he forgot about why he came to the room and raped Parvati, much to the dismay of other males who also wanted to rape her. Anyway, Johan Krauss wanted to continue the lesson, so he took everyone else outside. We stopped next to our satanist chapel, which looks like a typical pathetic christian chapel but it has an iverted cross, and some hieroglyphs and a large pentagram at its door. Out of it came the satanical nun Porra, also known as Po. She is the last of the teletubie race, one of the highest orders of demons prior to their near extinction at the hands of atheists. She greeted us.

"Hi guys, what are you doing today?"

"Hello Miss Porra, ve are going to summon Hogvart's Gods"

"Oh good! Here, come in!"

He entered the chapel; there a retarded baby sun appeared, but Po impaled him with a dildo and threw him outside. I was very excited; finally I would have a chance to meet with Hufflepuff!

"Okay kids, pay a lot of attention because I am going to show how to summon a god. First, you need four christians, three of them white and another black. Zen you shall sacrifice zem at ze altars of Hogvarts, which are four places: zis chapel, ze fountain, ze obelisk and ze church. Zen you shall kill zem according to ze god's demands. For example, to summon Ravenclaw you shall kill ze nigger in the obelisk by piercing his lungs, while to summon Hufflepuff you shall pick one of ze white guys and borrow him and suffocate him with earth. Before you kill your christian brand him wiz ze Illuminati symbol of Earth/Air/Fire/Water, depending on ze victim. Zen say "Fuck Dan Brown!" and your god shall appear. Good luck!"

"But how do we obtain our christians?"

"Nothing is as simple. Ve shall go to ze Bible Belt to collect out victims! Miss Porra, if you wish..."

"Sure! Suinus Influenza!"

And then a portal opened. It lead directly to the Bible Belt, one of the two countries USA was divided into after the WWIII (the other being the Divided Nations of Canada). We went through the portal and we end up in the middle of a town. It was absolutely digusting, with a primitive architecture that I swear it dates from the 30's and full of crosses and christian churches and other horrible things that thankfully are rare in the rest of the word. And then we saw the natives. They were fucking walking and talking vegetables! Two of them, an odd pair composed by a tomato and a cucumber, walked to us, both bearing a nauseous stupid look and smile! I actually vomited on them, and Krauss patted my back, trying to comfort me.

"I guess someone's not eating enough veggies!" said the cucumber smiling.

"Fuck, are you cannibals or what!?" I said, then vomiting again

"That wasn't very nice! You're a very rude boy" said the tomato, now upset

"As if I cared, shitball of salad"

"My name is Bob (and the cucumber is Larry, by the way), and if you continue down this path God will punish you"

I laughed, and once I stopped the stupid preps from Gryffindor and Ravenclaw looked at me with a pissed off face, completly agreeing with what the aberrations of nature had said. Krauss then showed them the middle finger, and so did Hermione and the other satanists that had come along. This signal hadn't passed unnoticed to the veggies.

"YOU'RE A SATANIST!? BURN IN HELL FAG!"

"Don't make me laugh salad!"

"Thou shalt be stoned to DEATH, as all infidels are!"

Saying that, the tomato, the cucumber and the rest of their friends tried to stone us, but then they realised they have no hands to throw us anything, so we simply killed them and turned them into salad. I only eat vegetables in my human form (as mustelids can't digest plant matter), but I always need cum to give it flavour. Thus, Krauss kindly caught an opossum and masturbated it on my salad, made out of Bob the tomato's remains. Then, once we finished eating the vegetables...

"WHAT THE HELL IS GOIN' ON HERE!?"

It was Chuck Norris, one of the few christians that pose a threat. I got scared, as I heard many rumours of how he caught satanists and atheists alike and gutted them. He is also famous for being a millitant homophobic and he noticed I was gay! He was coming closer, with a very angry look on his eyes, and I feared for my life. Secretly, many of the preps were cheering, and I showed them my middle finger. Then I noticed Chuck Norris was just a few meters away from me!

"Prepare to die fag!"

"Only under my rooten suit you Arschloch!" said Krauss while placing himself in front of me

"Fuck I hate germans! They deserve to die those atheists/satanists!"

That was it

"You did a very big mistake vhen you threatned my student, but you shall never, but never, MISTAKE AN ATHEIST FOR A SATANIST!!! And I don't like americans either!"

Chuck Norris got red in rage, and punched Krauss, breaking his helmet. Big mistake: the ghost possessed his body, and made Chuck Norris punch himself till he lost all conscience and became totally under Johan's control.

"Vell, vhat a nice body! Its a shame ve'll have to sacrifice it in name of our lesson."

"Well, while you are possessing that body, could you please fuck me?"

Johan Krauss looked confused.

"Don't you have a bf?"

"Well yeah, but he doesn't mind if I have sex with a teacher. Besides, I like you very much and I might never have the chance of having sex with you again, so..."

Krauss then kissed me passionately. Its rather ironic that the body that before wished to kill me was making me horny!

"Students, I'm going to show you how to properly fuck a ferret verewolf. Do not leave or else..."

Just to make sure they didn't left he made a spell that turned the legs of the preps into rock. The stupid idiots then began to cry, while satanists began anticipating what would happen; I would never allow them to fuck me, for I love my mate very much, but at least they could masturbate looking at me. Even Po got a christian cross to masturbate with!

"To be honest Rick I alvays vanted to have sex viz you. You're the best student I ever had, and if John didn't got you first I would claim you as my mate"

I felt very flattered, and I kissed my teacher's lips. Then I turned into my ferret form and I took off my clothes. Krauss simply ripped off his, as he was only temporarily in that body anyway. I the got myself on my knees, and I opened my mouth. With one swift motion Johan placed his erect cock in my mouth; they he garbbed my head and began thrusting on my tight muzzle. Chuck Norris has a small cock, but I enjoyed it anyway. He came after a minute or two. I swallowed all of his load, as I always do. After he released my head I turned around, rising my ass and tail high. He then rubbed his now lubed pole in my ass, and he fucked me. He grabbed my hips and thrusted hard and fast, and I moaned all along, my prostate on fire. Eventually he came and flooded my bowels, and my seed felt in the soil. A small plant germinated.

After we cleaned we managed to find the remaining necessary christians, and we returned to Hogwarts.