Maybe Hell is Not So Bad
Baphomet has problems. Remember to comment and vote. I love the feedback on these short stories that totally aren't part of a bigger series. *wink wink*
Deep in the depths of hell, Baphomet happily walks down the hellfire lit path from the cave he uses as an office and home. His muscular naked body is unusually clean for living in the pits of filth. The black fur of his goat head, tail, and legs are contrasted by the hairless creamy white human skin on his arms and torso.
Baphomet can choose to look however he wants, but after a relaxing vacation in the mortal realm, he stuck with the form that was particularly arousing to a certain anthro he met. His long uncircumcised human penis swings freely without shame.
The men and women in cages lining the sides of the path pause their screams of anguish to watch him pass. Baphomet gives his tail extra swish as they stare at his bare butt and the pentagram tattoo tramp stamp above it.
Not much mind is paid to the humans in cages. Baphomet is personally responsible for tormenting them, but they do that enough to themselves and each other.
Baphomet pauses as a voice cordially says, "Good morning, Lord Baphomet." Baphomet looks where it came from and sees one of the few anthros that made it into hell. God welcomes anthros into heaven pretty much wholesale, unlike the humans that are held to a higher standard. It really takes some effort for an anthro to get into the bad place.
The white tail deer leans against the bars of the too small cage with his legs hanging out. His fur is burnt and covered in the blood that drips constantly from his antlers. Regardless of how the deer holds his head, the blood always drips into his eyes and stings.
Wiping his eyes, the deer looks up at Baphomet wondering if daring to greet his tormentor was the biggest mistake of his afterlife.
Baphomet smiles and says, "Peter, I know you're new here and your attempt at pleasantries are admirable, but there are no day cycles, and we don't sleep." Peter points and says, "You live over that way, right? When you leave it's morning and when you come home it's evening."
Baphomet nods his head that it could be that simple. A voice from down the line yells, "Hey kiss ass, he's not going to be nice back." Baphomet snaps his fingers and the voice chokes. With a booming voice Baphomet says, "Who says I can't be nice? Every second any of you are not in complete agony is a gift from the heavens."
All the humans avert their eyes before they make contact with Baphomet's. Not a single one risked to draw Baphomet's attention. Baphomet looks down into the buck's bloody eyes as they look back at him.
With a smile, Baphomet touches the cage, and the bars disappear. Baphomet can feel all the eyes stare in glee that they are about to have some entertainment to distract them from their personal torment.
Peter crawls out of the cage and stands up. Baphomet's clean body is a stark contrast to the bloody white tail deer anthro's naked body. Peter proudly wears only his dirty fur unlike the humans who cling to scraps of filthy cloth. The humans will torment themselves over modesty with itchy flea cover clothes, making the job of tormenting them easier than it should be.
Baphomet asks, "You enjoy murdering humans?" Peter answers, "Yes Lord Baphomet." Baphomet sarcastically says, "Finally, an honest man in hell. I'll let you murder anyone here."
The buck's eyes shine with bloodlust. Peter doesn't hesitate and answers, "The one who insulted you." Baphomet admits to himself that he's suddenly taken a liking to Peter.
Baphomet walks down the line of cages and selects the human. Baphomet doesn't even remember any of the human's names or sins since they are so common in hell. He has a parchment work underling that keeps track of it in case an angel comes snooping around looking for an audit.
Touching the cage, it opens. The human wears a dirty tunic and pants. Setting a dirty bare foot on the ground outside the cage, the human pulls it back as it burns. The human chokes as he tries to object.
Baphomet kicks his hoof against the cage and says, "Get over there and fight him." The human rips the sleeves off his shirt and slides them over his feet like socks. The cloth burns apart after a few steps outside and the human dances from foot to foot as he squares up to the buck.
Peter wipes the blood from his eyes and lowers his antlers. The human puts up a valiant effort, but Peter swiftly gores him in the chest. The human slumps to the ground in what passes for sleep. Peter pulls back and admires his work. The buck has a raging erection from the thrill of being allowed to fulfill his violent urges. Peter strokes his cock slowly. The jeers and sneers of the disgusted humans become overpoweringly loud.
Peter looks at Baphomet but gets no indication he should stop. Torturing the humans by forcing them to watch an anthro unashamedly masturbate feels fitting enough. Baphomet crosses his arms and watches the buck masturbate himself to completion over the bloody body. The ropes of jizz hit the human in the face.
Baphomet says, "Now be a deer and throw him back in his cage." Peter rips off the human's shirt and uses it as a headband to soak up the dripping blood for temporary relief.
The human is dragged by an arm across the ground and rolled back into the cage. The cage snaps shut around the human and Peter walks to stand in front of his own. Baphomet says, "You didn't draw out the fight." Peter answers, "I went for the fastest way to shut him up, but what's the point if he's just going to respawn to taunt me again?" Baphomet answers, "It would have been entertaining to me." Peter replies, "I will remember that Lord Baphomet."
Peter looks around and asks, "Is this all there is to my eternal torment? Surrounded and heckled by humans that can't be silenced. I thought it would be worse than something I already lived through once." Baphomet answers, "Maybe I have been getting pretty lazy in my old age. Did you have some ideas that could make it worse?"
Peter steps back into his cage and says, "No, my lord." Baphomet grins and says, "I know what could really get under your skin." Peter waits expectantly for the answer but Baphomet turns and walks off. Peter looks at the missing door of his tiny cage as Baphomet gets further and further down the path.
The unknown of the situation frightens Peter. He remembers crossing a river and some other metaphorical bullshit after he died. It wasn't even that unpleasant of a journey being led by a demon to his cage. Peter has a distinct feeling that Baphomet is apathetic to his job.
Peter occasionally waves a hand outside the open door trying to figure out what kind of a mind game trick this is. The humans in the other cages heckle him louder than ever before when he doesn't take advantage of his situation. The headband eventually soaks through with blood and Peter leaves his cage in search of a way to relieve his minor irritation.
Baphomet reaches a crossroads and makes a turn towards his cousin's place. The line of cages beside the path start to become sparser and contain humans of a progressively younger age. A sign out front declares that the cave belongs to Krampus.
Out of all of Baphomet's goat demon relatives, Krampus is one of the only ones whose name has gained popularity in recent times. Baphomet walks right in and calls out, "Krampus, are you home?" Krampus calls out, "Cousin! I'm here." Baphomet makes his way around all the stone furniture and into a back room.
At a desk is a naked black goat anthro doing paperwork. Krampus looks up and says, "You are looking awfully clean today." Baphomet is usually covered in soot as black as his furred parts. Baphomet says, "I'm trying a new look. Do you like it?" Baphomet spins in a circle and Krampus takes in the details of the superficial scars across the bridge of the muzzle, the pentagram tramp stamp, and the tattoo of another one of Baphomet's forms on the shoulder.
Krampus jokes, "Yes, but if you keep walking around with those naked human parts, you are going to be attacked by a lust demon." Baphomet gives his penis a few flops and says, "Loin cloths are out of fashion. Just like in the Garden of Eden, I bare all before my fellow kin and have no impure desires."
Krampus laughs and says, "That line might work on others, but I'm the one in charge of the naughty list." Baphomet leans over the desk to look at the lists. Krampus grabs a scrap of parchment and writes, 'Baphomet: Naughty. Dereliction of duties. Revealing the existence of the afterlife to a mortal. Premarital sex with a centaur.'' Krampus picks up his magic quill before it can write anything else and stares in shock at the scrap.
Baphomet pulls the scrap away and says, "Like I'm supposed to marry outside my species." Krampus waves his quill and says, "Anyway… Why did you stop by?" Baphomet answers, "It's so boring in hell. We don't hang out anymore." Krampus puts the quill to the parchment and says, "With the exponential population explosion. The bureaucracy is stretched pretty thin. You should be busy with work."
Baphomet says, "Nah, people torture themselves and each other well enough that I hardly have anything to do." Krampus says, "Lucky you." Baphomet walks around the back of the desk and hugs Krampus from behind. Baphomet asks, "Want to have sex like we used to?" Krampus says, "I have work to do. So, unless you plan on crawling under the desk to pleasure me, I'm much too busy."
Baphomet gets down on his hands and knees to crawl under the desk. Krampus spreads his legs to reveal his well sized goat balls and sheath. Baphomet fingers the sheath and says, "I'm doing this for your own good as well as mine."
Krampus keeps writing and looking over lists like nothing is happening. Baphomet places the emerging penis to his mouth and suckles it gently. Krampus enjoys the stimulation. Baphomet's horns tap against the underside of the desk in a steady rhythm. The time flies and Krampus suddenly realizes he's out of lists of children to judge.
Leaning back in his chair, Krampus looks down at Baphomet's face pressed into his crotch. Baphomet looks back up, daring him to say something. Krampus smiles and says, "Fine. Bend over the desk, you fucking whore."
With enthusiasm, Baphomet spits out the twelve-inch goat cock and stands up. Krampus pulls Baphomet closer and kisses him on the mouth. Their tongues intertwine and Krampus tastes his own cock in his cousin's mouth.
Krampus pushes Baphomet away and bends him over the desk. Baphomet hikes his tail as Krampus lines his saliva-covered cock up. Grabbing two handfuls of Baphomet's hips, Krampus pushes all the way in with a single thrust.
Baphomet says, "Oh that's the spot. Really get rough with me." Krampus' thrusts are long and hard from the start. Baphomet moans in pleasure as demonic energy exchanges between them with every thrust.
Both the goat demons are quickly overcome with pleasure. Krampus slaps Baphomet's ass causing the demon to clamp down on his cock. Krampus hits his climax and the magical shock to Baphomet's prostate causes him to peak as well.
The floor is splattered with seed as the two ride out their pleasure. Krampus pulls Baphomet's tail a few times and says, "I hate it when you are right." Baphomet looks over his shoulder and asks, "Did you want to go again?" Krampus answers, "As good as that felt. I wasn't trying to brush you off when I said I am very busy." Krampus pulls his cock out and not a drop of seed leaks out.
Krampus takes the stack of finished parchment work and drops it in a file cabinet. He pulls open another drawer and seemingly grabs a thick stack of parchments at random. Baphomet asks, "How about you suck my dick while I do the writing? All you gotta do is, jot down whatever pops into your head when you see the person's name, right? Easy Peasy."
Krampus smiles and says, "The naughty judging the naughty? That sounds like a terrible idea." Baphomet grabs the quill and scrap of paper with his name. Under it he writes, 'Krampus: Nice. Too polite to say no to his family. Dedicated to his work.' Baphomet raises the magical quill and says, "Mother Fucker, you used to get into as much mischief as I did." Krampus waves the stack of parchments and says, "Idle hands are the devil's playground." Baphomet rolls his head and says, "Don't bring Grandpa into this."
Baphomet slides the parchment to the edge of the desk to let it flutter to the floor. The ink smears as it quickly leeches up Baphomet's spilled seed. Krampus sits down at his desk and says, "It was good seeing you though." Baphomet replies, "Yeah, you too. I'll see myself out." Krampus looks at an ink smudged handprint on Baphomet's butt as he walks out the door.
Krampus leans down to pick up the parchment beside his hoof. He smiles warmly as he sees the seed caused the ink to turn into a cartoonish drawing of Baphomet getting fucked by Krampus over the desk. Krampus blows on it to make the ink cum mixture instantly dry. He opens a desk drawer and carefully tucks the drawing away.
On the path home, Baphomet passes several limp naked human bodies inside cages. He slows down and asks, "What's been happening here?" One of the few untouched humans avoids eye contact and answers, "A blood covered demon stabbing people with its horns." Baphomet says, "Oh, that one."
Wanting to reward the human for being helpful, Baphomet asks, "What's your least favorite flavor of ice cream?" The human is compelled to answer, "I once had some store brand licorice that tasted like satan's balls." Baphomet uses his powers combined with sleight of hand to produce an ice cream cone filled with three scoops of licorice ice cream.
Baphomet takes a lick, works the flavor around his mouth, and says, "I could see how you would think that." Baphomet holds the ice cream out and says, "You can have the rest." The human looks at it in disgust. Baphomet says, "If you don't want it, I'm sure the ice cream wagon will be around soon."
The human begrudgingly takes the ice cream cone, knowing that even the worst flavor of icecream is better than none. Baphomet licks his forked tongue around in his mouth as he follows the clues to where Peter went.
Drops of blood and deer hoof prints are easy to follow. Baphomet comes across Peter sitting in his open cage ripping clothing into strips. Peter looks up and says, "Good afternoon Lord Baphomet."
Baphomet chuckles and asks, "Did you enjoy your torture?" Peter wraps another strip around his bloody antler and answers, "No. I mean, yes. I mean, what is the correct answer?" Baphomet spreads his hands in a shrug and answers, "Who's to know. Hell is what you make it. Do you want that bleeding to stop?"
Peter asks, "You could do that for me?" Baphomet answers, "Nope. You need to remove them yourself." Peter exclaims, "Remove them? But I need them!" Baphomet asks, "Do you really?"
Baphomet silently smiles at Peter, as the buck works it out in his head. Peter asks, "Do you have a saw?" Baphomet teasingly runs his hands from the black fur on his neck down across his pale human abs, around to cup his bare butt, and then says, "No. You'll need to pull from the root." Peter exclaims, "That would mess up my pedicle. They would never grow back properly. I could get a brain abscess and die..." Baphomet gestures to the hellscape around them.
Peter grips his cloth covered bloody antler at its base and gives it an experimental tug. Peter is used to his antlers shedding naturally. An accidental bump on a door frame and one just falls off, quickly followed by the other. His potential victims, safe until next season.
Assuming this is another layer of his torture, Peter changes his grip to different parts and tugs at his head. Little progress is made as the constant flow of blood from the tips make his dirty hands slick.
Baphomet taps the rusty metal bars of the cage. They reverberate with a long, distressing musical ring as the idea forms in Peter's mind. Peter looks up at what passes for a sky and hooks his antlers between the grid of bars. Peter adjusts his antlers until they feel like they are locked in a good position.
With a loud bellow, Peter thrashes his head around violently. A crack sounds and Peter stops his movement. One antler hangs loosely and Peter reaches up to give it a few wiggles to finish pulling it away.
It clatters to the floor of the cage and Peter weakly says, "Halfway there." Peter twists his head and the other antler breaks off. Peter cries in pain as his head pulls free. He feels at the bloody nubs carefully. Peter presses bundles of cloth to his head to soak up the residual blood.
Baphomet reaches out to pick up the fallen antlers. The tips continue to drip with blood. Baphomet holds them up and says, "I'll hang on to these. I'm sure I could make a badass blood fountain out of these."
Peter takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly. He feels a tinge of regret for removing his natural weapons. They are his favorite way to kill.
Baphomet begins to walk off. Peter calls out, "Thank you Lord Baphomet." Baphomet looks back and says, "Don't mention it. Like seriously, don't tell anyone I helped you." Baphomet looks around at all the limp, bloody humans in cages around Peter and states, "If you wanted peace and quiet, there is a nice spot over that hill." Peter replies, "I'm a person of habit and this cage is all I know."
Baphomet continues down the path home wondering if the sudden freedom is torturing Peter as well as he calculated. Humans regain consciousness one by one with horrifying screams. The noise annoys Peter and he wanders over the hill to get away from it.